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Kleo (2022)
If Nikita went to Lillihammer..
It's tongue is very firmly in its cheek, but what results is a wonderfully dark, 80's era spy series, with solid cast, good pacing, and plenty to like.
Yes, the story requires you to accept the ridiculous, (unless you want to review the series as "unbelievable" or "not making sense"), but if you are happy to accept that little bit of a ridiculous, its an enjoyable, bingeable, spy romp.
La noche más larga (2022)
Thoroughly enjoyable bit of escapism
I see a lot of reviews saying the Longest Night is "unrealistic".. so is Game of Thrones, so is Hannah, so is every single James Bond movie ever madeor Jon Wick. It doesn't stop them being great television.
Yes, its far fetched and obviously has no basis in truth. But its got good pacing, it explores selected characters to a decent degree, and overall its a fun watch.
Oh, and If you don't like "dubbing" simply watch it in Spanish with subtitles on. Like any non-english show it is far better watched in original language with subtitles if you need them.
The Gringo Papi (2022)
Special
So, doing 20 minutes at an open mic night and then posting it on Youtube constitutes a "Special"?
A 20 minute blend of not so subtle racism, mostly aimed at his wife who he clearly hates, and some jokes and mannerisms stolen from other people.
This is actually, by some margin, worst than his first.
Outer Banks (2020)
First season, OK, but rapidly becomes nonsense
If we ignore the fact that the cast are 16 year olds being played by actors touching thirty, the first 3/4 of season one was ok. But then it rapidly degenerates into nonsense.
Probably the worst element is the laughable investigation skills of the police. They launch a wide-scale manhunt for one person based on the oral testimony of a second, and despite several people accusing the real perpetrator of the crime publicly, the police feel fit to not interview him and just take his word for it that his daughter is bipolar and that is why she is accusing him.
Unfortunately what started so well, like a modern day Famous 5 story, rapidly falls into completely unbelievable nonsense.
Mortal Kombat (2021)
Nothing we haven't seen before
I ended up giving up on this about 35 minutes in.
It was just too predictable, the story has been told 100 times before, and really brought nothing new to the table.
The opening fight scene was good enough, and the special effects are 2020, but outside of that, it is basically any Jean Claude Van Damme movie repackaged with worse fight scenes and better effects.
Got boring fairly quickly.
Loco por ella (2021)
Surprising such a low rating
Sure, it's no Saving Private Ryan or One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest but it isn't trying to be.
What it is is a solid romcom that does an effective job of exploring mental health issues and the difficulties of relationships involving people suffering from them. As others have said, you either get it or you don't. Anyone who has struggled with their mental health or has close family or friends who do will 100% "get it"
Rogue (2020)
Pick a plot, stick to it, this is all over the place
Day one: Watched approximately the first 40 minutes of this film before I decided it was trash and gave up on it.
Day two: Decided to give it a second chance, watched from around minute 30 to just over the hour mark, and again, gave up on it.
There will not be a day three. This film is just horrible, and one of the worst action films I have ever seen.
In short a group of mercenaries (who we know nothing about and therefore have no feelings towards or empathy for) rescue a girl (who we know nothing about, nor is it ever explained who she is, why she's important and therefore like the mercenaries we care nothing about her) from some bad guys (who yes, you've guessed it we know nothing about and so don't care about either) and then get chased across Africa
Then it strangely morphs into a cross between a low budget horror, Tiger King and an endangered species awareness film.
It's just incredibly badly made. The plot seems to veer from one topic to another and it hasnt even seem to have worked out what story it is trying to relay, the acting is pretty poor, the action scenes laughable (did they even have anyone on set teaching them how to hold weapons?) and the special effects b-grade.
Maybe something happened over the final 30 minutes that redeemed this utter botch job. I will live the rest of my life not knowing I guess.
Barkskins (2020)
Solid series let down by a rushed final episode
Overall I really enjoyed it and binged it over the course of a few days. Good character development, wide range of characters and some historical stuff.
Only disappointment was the final episode. Apparently it was originally scheduled for 10 episodes and was cut to 8 because of filming issues and it REALLY showed. The final episode felt rushed and don't even get me started on certain characters that just completely vanished into nowhere.
If there is a season 2 I will certainly watch it, if only because there are a lot of loose ends from season 1
Sex Education (2019)
First season great, second season, hugely dissapointing
The first season of Sex Education was refreshingly candid, with decent enough storyline and while it did address important topics for teens, these topics did not dominate the show keeping it enjoyable for those who have left their teenage years behind. (Season 1 was a solid 8/10)
The second season however has been hugely disappointing as Netflix go overboard on the "education" at the expense of plot and ongoing storyline. Rather than developing characters and where there are issues to discuss going into to them in depth and in an interesting way, season 2 has just become "how many sexually transmitted diseases, contraception stories, and sexual preferences can we cram into one episode".
Now instead of being a drama that still managed to address important issues, it comes over as a government sponsored sex education video from the 1990's.
Yes, its important to address teen pregnancy, homosexuality, lesbianism, vaginismus, syphillis and whatever else but in a convincing manner, but taking characters from a heterosexual relationship and suddenly flipping them into a gay relationship (despite no background on the characters leanings), in fact a lesbian relationship that progresses to a full blown sexual one literally before the first date is just checking boxes at the expense of any character development or reality.
Kill Mode (2020)
You will either love it or hate it.
If you loved "Molly" then this prequel offers more of the same. Dodgy dialogue and off the wall plot points linked by various (at times utterly ridiculous) fighting sequences that draws elements from multiple b-movies of the past.
It does a passable job of answering some of the things not explained in Molly, where her abilities came from (although a lot of things in kill Mode don't totally line up for me).
If you like hammy b-movies that at times try a little too hard, you will love every minute of it (but watch Molly first). If you don't, you will hate it.
6 Underground (2019)
Does exactly what you would expect.
Some of the reviewers here must have gone into this film with really peculiar expectations. This film achieves everything it sets out to.
Is the plot a bit weak, sure. Is it going to win any awards, no. Is the acting at times mediocre, yes. Are large parts of it ridiculous and cliched, hell yes.
But is it a fun, no brain power required, easy to watch film with some decent and over the top action sequences? In every way, yes.
It achieves everything it sets out to do. Be a fun, over the top, waste of a couple of hours.
Grisse (2018)
Gritty, Gory, Great
Honestly, the best western TV series since Deadwood. A western you say? Yes, to all intents and purposes thats what it is. Questionable "good guys", even more questionable (and borderline insane) "bad guys", and gritty narrative set in a small town that isnt a million miles from Deadwood. At times its a bit hammy, it borrows aspects from the great spaghetti westerns and ninja movies, but thoroughly entertaining.
Really hope that HBO give this a wider audience by showing it on the main US network. It deserves it.
Molly (2017)
Everything a low budget B-movie should be
B-movie heaven.
Bad acting, hysterical accents, nonsensical plot, terrible fight sequences (I feel ike they did them in slow mo and then sped up the film to normal speed), totally unbelievable lead (but hey, shes cute), I'm literally finding it impossible to say anything bad about this movie.. its ridiculous.
I think you either "get" what this film is trying to achieve or you don't. If you do you will love it. I got it. Best B-movie I have seen since "They Live" (and the overly long, crazily choreographed fight scenes reminded me very much of that)
Now You See Me (2013)
Starts well, goes downhill from there
This showed promise, encouraged by some positive reviews, a decent line up and a reasonable rating I decided to give it a go.
It started well enough, the initial background was sort of OK, the plot looked like it could be interesting. The first half an hour or so had an intelligent approach, was filled with humor, but from the half way mark it rapidly went downhill.
The last half hour was hugely disappointing, the finish was, frankly dire, and seemed rushed. A twist at the end was anything but surprising, seriously, it was almost as if the writers wrote the screenplay, the film was completed and somebody suddenly thought "we need a twist" and bodged together the quickest twist that they could. The characters were barely developed, a romantic liaison that frankly was ridiculous and totally unexplored. Totally forgettable.
Under the Dome (2013)
On the whole, shockingly bad
I've made it to episode 10, and I still just cant make my mind up on this. The premise is good, it has the potential, if scripted well, directed well, with strong actors to turn into a highly entertaining and interesting series. Unfortunately so far its failed on all counts. They are cut off from civilisation by a dome, great, but that gives opportunity to explore the characters, look at how they cope under these circumstances, but after ten episodes we know next to nothing of the characters. They seem to have completely forgotten about their family members trapped outside the dome, new characters pop up at random from where I don't know, hell they've all been trapped for weeks, where are we finding new people from. What makes it worse is the acting. Two in particular stand out. Junior is thorough unlikable, and badly acted, I've been wanting him dead since episode one, and Colin Ford as Joe, the kid considering he has such a key part in the series is totally unconvincing. Britt Robertson is probably one of the better young actors but she really needs to talk to her agent about the shoddy roles he's getting her. The secret circle was scrapped after one season, and Im frankly amazed that Under the Dome has been renewed for a second.
Pusher (2012)
Fails to deliver
Rarely have I got to a film feeling so little about it. I don't hate it, I don't love it, I'm just completely and utterly indifferent to the 90 minutes of droning nothingness.
I haven't seen the original so I cant compare, but the plot is incredibly thin, just an endless chain of events, that follow on from each other with no particular cohesion. An ending that leaves you feeling frankly conned, and some situations that even in the realms of the movie word are unbelievable.
The worst part is the complete lack of exploration of the characters and events. Despite the small cast you come out feeling you know very little about the characters, and equally you care very little for any of the characters. There are no real good guys, no bad guys, just a whole bunch of indifference. Too much is not explored, where did the police come from and why? How is it possible that no word got out that he had been arrested, leading to the belief that he had ripped off the bad guys in some way.
The film ended with you feeling that there was so much more that could have been explored, so much more that you could have been told about the characters, the locations and the events. The trouble is, I came out feeling that I didn't really care enough anyway to even want to know more.
Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011)
Great CGI do not a good film make.
To see reviewers say "the most emotional planet of the apes film" or "a masterpiece" makes me wonder if they have seen a different film to me.
Firstly, I must admit, I am a huge fan of the original films, when I say original, i do not mean the Tim Burton catastrophe of 2001, but he original series of films.
What those films had and what set the apes franchise apart, was strong scripts, extensive plots, social messages, and plenty of twists. Rise of planet of the apes, sadly has none of those.
The storyline, is basic at best, for the first half an hour it felt like a Disney movie, as they explained the blatantly obvious to the viewers. They almost completely fail to explore the characters, James Franco's relationship with Pinto, his relationship with his father, even his relationship with Cesar seem barely explored. Jacobs seems to flit from bad guy to good guy quicker than you can say Jacobs. And the lab tech, who was so memorable I cant even remember his name, what happened there, are we supposed to care about his fate, did the other characters in the movie even care about his fate? Is it a good film? Its OK, it really has very little to do with Planet of the Apes and probably shouldn't even say Planet of the Apes in the title. The plot is pretty thin and the whole film feels like its missing about 30 minutes of background and relationship scenes. That said, it was tedious and slow enough for the first hour without the extra scenes. The CGI is great, although claims that Cesar is the greatest moment of cgi in cinema history are well off the mark. Its good, but most of the time its pretty obvious its cgi.
Is it better than the Tim Burton film, the jury's out. Is it better than the original films, no chance.
Plus Points: Great CGI Downsides: Formulaic plot, no character development
Predators (2010)
Watch the original instead..
I give this a very generous 2, it gets 2 points just because the special effects were reasonably good. The rest, just a blatant copy of the original film, similar characters, similar weapons, which just makes you think you've seen it all before. Some of the characters even manage to get killed in similar circumstances.
If you've seen the original film, and want to watch something almost identical with even worse acting, then this is the film for you. I will be brief with the review, as I actually went to sleep 40 minutes into it. The last hour might have been amazing, I will never no, I have no intention of watching the rest.
If you've seen the original don't bother with this. If you've not, then its probably worth a look.
Reds & Blues: The Ballad of Dixie & Kenny (2010)
Simply Awful.
After reading IMDb for several years, it has taken a film of such amazing awfulness to persuade me to put figurative pen to paper.
I had high hopes for this film. Liverpool over the years has been the breeding ground for some comedy legends, and the combination of scouse humour, and the rivaly between Liverpool and Everton seemed like it could be a winner.
How wrong I was. Poor jokes, that didn't even raise a laugh in the room, cheap gags that seem aimed at people with an iq below 40, and acting as bad as I have ever seen. No plot, No Jokes, No Point.
I turned off after 20 minutes. The least funny film I have ever seen, and I've seen a few, and desperately sad that this is the best they could come up with. There are funnier cabbies in Liverpool than any of the writers involved with this film.