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Golden Ivory (1954)
The Brits must be crazy
Quick and colourful African western concerning English settlers getting to grips with the perils of native Kenya. Essentially a glorified faunalogue in which reluctant hunters on horseback stalk the savanna in search of game, whilst mild romantic undertones simmer in the background.
Urquhart is the more amiable of the contracted hunters, trying his best to manage his alcoholic brother (Dobson) and the attentions of a nubile female passenger (Stephen, whose rather revealing moment bathing in a river late in the movie appears to have been missed in the editing room). Local beauty Maureen Connell also appears in her film debut before becoming an occasional female lead in Britain in the late 50s.
Tussles with leopards, lions and snakes offset by lighthearted moments admiring giraffe and tree monkeys, but there's tension on the horizon as the intrepid adventurers attempt to cross a treacherous river and must survive local tribes unhappy with colonialist encroachment.
Economical British safari is generally well acted standard fare, akin to any number of traditional second-bill westerns of the 50s, although there's an unexpected twist at the climax before justice is served. No frills, just the usual threats punctuated by inert-looking wildlife and tepid romance.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Highwire (1992)
Does a burger come with that shake?
Steve has the best dialogue, and his retort to Andrea enquiring whether boys undress her in their mind promotes a pearler of a response from Steve (part of which seems improvised judging from the reactions of Priestley and Green) and is an absolute cracker. In fact, the cheeky twinkle in his eye is regularly on display throughout this episode as he offers to support David with a visual memory he can't seem to shake.
SATs mean tertiary entrance time on 90210 but there's more on the minds of some, with a somewhat awkward tightrope analogy emphasising the fear of the unknown as they each contemplate the vast options that might be available to them. Complicating matters are their individual grades and financial situations which influence decision-making and threaten to separate the usually tight-knit group.
Pretty decent early season three episode also features the new recurring characters Mr. Myers (call me 'Gil') and Brandon's latest love interest Nikki (Barron) in a minor role, along with another appearance by future 'The Nanny' co-star Nicholle Tom as the ill-fated Scott Scanlon's wayward sister.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Meeting Mr. Pony (1992)
The night the Peach Pit lost its innocence
Brenda gets the jitters following a scary armed robbery leading concerned friends to suspect she may have developed PTSD as a result of the ordeal. The pressure amplifies amid the backdrop of the mid-term exams, which prompts the need for intervention.
Generally well-developed plot includes some existentially violent flashbacks/ hallucinations, and a tense climax in which Brenda is encouraged to confront her anxiety.
Doherty delivers a decent performance that's not too over the top with the emotions, although the 'business as usual' approach of everyone else seemed unrealistic given the circumstances. The only curious aspect was the closing scene in which Brandon appears to be wearing scrubs, until I realised it was just nineties wardrobe I hadn't encountered.
Beverly Hills, 90210: U4EA (1991)
Crazy 90210
Brandon, Emily and co learn the hard way that illicit drugs make you lose your inhibitions and do stupid things you'll later regret, if not worse. We also learn that not everyone deals with rejection well, invoking some 'Fatal Attraction' vibes (which Brenda duly notes), creating some of the most uncomfortable moments in the series to date.
It's surprising just how well everyone reacts to the increasingly threatening behaviour, but of course just when things become really menacing (the potential for an almighty fireball no less), we're let off the hook with a rather superficial expose on emotional wellbeing and mental disturbance.
Still despite the casual resolution, it's tense for a while and there's a funny scene in which one of our favourites discovers the pitfalls of consuming too much alcohol, much to everyone's disgust and amusement. There's also the ubiquitous visible boom mic for those who enjoy goof spotting; having already made so many appearances in the series thus far, it really should receive credit as a recurring character.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Necessity Is a Mother (1991)
Hawaii 90210
Season two's use of bigger name actors continues with ex-Hammer horror / Dynasty alumni Beacham debuting the much-anticipated character of Dylan's long-absent mother, a Hawaii based hippie now trying to raise her son following an extended period of estrangement, finding that Dylan has not yet reconciled his feelings of abandonment.
Beacham is gregarious and not nearly as whacky as expected, Dylan's defiance seems to stem more from the past than the present, and the Walsh's warm to her as an extended family. Despite their reunification and semblance of family forming, Dylan is struggling with the adjustment and may soon self-destruct if someone doesn't help him to see the error of his ways before it's too late.
Sincere and genuinely heart-warming episode benefits from Beacham's obvious experience, and whilst the ending is true to form 90210 'at your convenience', it's good to know it won't be the last time Beacham visits the LA postcode, providing us the opportunity to see how they're fragile relationship evolves over time, and whether Dylan is able to overcome some of his lingering resentment.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Ashes to Ashes (1991)
Love thy neighbour
It was only a matter of time before 90210 visited the race issue, and after an initially terse introduction, Brandon and Sherice (Fox) develop a mutual interest that transcends racial boundaries but find that society at large remains covertly prejudiced.
Coming not long after the infamous Rodney King video surfaced (the eventual aftermath of which plunged LA into a days-long deadly riot), this episode depicts Brandon's attempts to investigate alleged racial-profiling mistreatment by a heavy-handed security patrol, but finds that the issues might be much more entrenched than he understands.
The appearance of John Shaft himself (Roundtree) might be the biggest guest name 90210 had hosted to this point, and the characters that appear with him as family (an attractive yet angsty teenage daughter, a budding photojournalist son) almost make it look like a back-door pilot for some form of spin-off concept.
Occasionally heated, the story still manages to find light at the end of the dark tunnel with an optimistic albeit conveniently handled climax and conclusion. Whether that ending trivialises the subject might depend on what you want to get out of such entertainment, suffice to say it's lightweight even by 90210 standards.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Anaconda (1991)
Know when to fold 'em
Weak episode concentrates on an apparently longstanding poker game tradition (looks like 5-card draw poker) in which Brandon, Steve and Dylan find themselves over their head when the venue hosting their illicit gambling club becomes the scene of an audacious crime.
There's the usual red herring and a moving defence of innocence, but the storyline really doesn't add up to much. Gaping plot holes and contrivances (why would anyone pawn their most sentimental belongings before household items?) leave a shallow impression, with little substance of sense.
The only appealing part of this episode is the optimistic conclusion, giving the audience a feint hope of eventual reconciliation for its central romance. Otherwise, this was a below-average outing.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Beach Blanket Brandon (1991)
Where there is David, there should be Scott
Season one ended with hope, season two begins with despair as Brenda and Dylan face their defining moment.
Brenda is off to the medical practice again, and Cindy & Jim are once again anxious parents, whilst Kelly is on hand to offer support and words of wisdom (Dylan on the other hand offends everyone when he suggests what many of us were already thinking).
Brandon and Andrea decide that friends with benefits might be complicated to manage and the new intro whilst rockin' harder than series one, is conspicuous in its omission of Douglas Emerson (Scott, David Silver's shadow) which hopefully will be addressed sooner rather than later.
Beverly Hills, 90210: The Party Fish (1991)
Grunions, parasols & soap operas
Veteran character actor James Sloyan (who most memorably played the ill-fated bag man in the 'The Sting') co-stars as an ageing tennis pro of the prestigious Beverly Hills surf club where Brandon has taken a higher paying job (as a kabana boy no less) in the hopes of purchasing a '65 Mustang of which he's become envious.
Per usual, the opportunity turns out to be too good to be true, even despite a supportive boss (Pickens) who happens to have an unusual affection for soap operas.
Guarded Goodrich plays Brandon's older love interest who's arrived at life's crossroads, and there's sparks of a different kind also flying between Brandon and a despondent Dylan, as he struggles to get to grips with his new chapter.
Overall it's an entertaining episode, elevated by the quality cast (Sloyan, Pickens and Goodrich especially) and a solid way to ease into season two shenanigans over the Spring break.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Home Again (1991)
Minneapolis beckoning
Season one finale isn't an especially tense affair although it does leave it tantalisingly close to decide the fate of the Walsh family's living arrangements when Jim is made a job offer he can't refuse.
Veteran film & TV actor Linden Chiles appears briefly as the feared Mr Powell whose presence usually signals lay-offs, placing everyone under a pall.
There's also a slightly uncomfortable sub-plot between Brandon and Andrea which doesn't really work, and seemed almost surreal all things considered. I guess we'll have to wait until season two to find out what becomes of the brokenhearted not to mention a major cliffhanger between Brenda and Dylan which flew out of the box in the closing seconds.
Solid final instalment is occasionally moving, ending with some heartfelt reflections from the main characters as the Walsh's begin to realise the positive impact they've had on the West Beverly community since they arrived from Minneapolis almost a year ago.
Time to saddle up for season two, beginning no doubt with Brenda and Dylan's big dilemma.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Spring Dance (1991)
Night to remember
The girls and boys frock up for a good time at the annual Spring dance except Steve who's still struggling to get over his messy breakup from Kelly.
Special mention also to David Silver and his slick dance moves (which look exhausting), I'm not sure how many takes he needed, but full credit to his flexibility and stamina, he's a machine on the dance floor.
It's a fairly typical coming of age school dance situation with all the usual motifs and plot devices from homecoming king & queen, hip flasks filled with angry juice, deep angst, disappointment and first time euphoria for a lucky few.
Lots of hormones, groping, face-munching, self-loathing and regret, except for the aforesaid David who moves like a professional back-up dancer to claim his long awaited 'prize'. As harmless as David seems to be, his obsession with Kelly has officially entered the creep zone, although no one seems to take him seriously enough to ever admonish his perverted fantasies.
Despite one or two serious revelations, the tone is mostly light, casual, occasionally comical (e.g. Donna) and mildly entertaining but certainly not amongst the best in season one.
One of Our Aircraft Is Missing (1942)
Tally-ho it's time to beat the Boche
Stiff propaganda film features six servicemen from a RAF bomber crew forced to crash land in occupied Holland where they're aided by the local resistance to defy the Nazis and escape back to England, if they can survive the unwanted attention.
Good cast features exotic-looking British stage actress Pamela Brown as a resistance leader, Googie Withers also a Dutch ally, and then small but not insignificant roles for a much trimmer looking Sir Peter Ustinov in his first credited appearance playing a clergyman, and Sir Robert Helpmann as a sanctimonious Nazi supporter who stumbles upon the group sitting down to lunch necessitating his capture to avoid the Germans being alerted (although his choice of LPs snookers him somewhat).
Occasionally tense with elaborate set design and a fitting soundtrack, this WWII era war film is a rollicking rearguard made to spur on the allies in their darkest moment, with an epitaph that signals relentless, dogged determination to stay the course, serve with distinction and prevail against the sworn enemy.
A Star Is Born (1937)
Three remakes, but no match for the original
Depending on your vintage, you possibly saw the Judy Garland version first, then Babs & Kris and if you were feeling vulnerable or distracted, the much-hyped Lady Gaga remake might've found its way in front of you. But none of those, not even Garland and Mason hold a candle to twin titans Gaynor and March.
March is superb as a chronically inebriated bachelor whose time in the Hollywood sun has set. Gaynor, her youthful exuberance and 'nice, normal' girl look and posture briefly revive his profile but it soon becomes apparent that he's holding her back.
Impeccably sharp dialogue (some purpose built for parodying e.g. 'I'm afraid my mouth's not quite big enough') delivered by consummate professionals; Menjou as the sage, cynical yet still sympathetic studio head offset by the rather crude Stander character, a bullying publicist who has all the right answers when all the questions are wrong.
Bittersweet, poignant portrayal of ambitious but ultimately fragile folks exploited by a system which ultimately breeds disappointment and insecurity, efficient in protecting its reputation but negligently slow to support those displaying obvious signs of personal crisis. Near flawless and a great shame (and touch of irony) that March didn't get the gong for this masterclass.
Beverly Hills, 90210: One Man and a Baby (1991)
Daddy daycare 90210
Brandon becomes a glorified babysitter with Steve as the pair discover the pitfalls of caring for a baby whilst Brenda and Kelly contemplate jumping out of a plane and overcome a fear of the unknown.
This early season one episode is still trying to find the right tone, and as such the plot deviates between lighthearted, trivial humour (channeling the contemporaneous hit 'Three Men & a Baby') and more serious themes like teenage pregnancy and post-natal depression.
Too-easily resolved, but nevertheless mildly entertaining with some decent dramatic acting (Dattilo in particular who went on to have recurring roles in 'The Chris Isaak Show' and 'Dexter'), and a few chuckles.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Spring Training (1991)
Stray dogs and first base bullies
90210 takes to the diamond as Brandon and Steve assume coaching duties of a little league baseball team when Jim's over-zealous bat swing leaves him incapacitated. As anticipated, they soon find that the attitude of some of the players isn't at the standard expected which causes tempers to fray, including those of the overly invested parents living vicariously through their spoilt children's competitive sport.
In the companion storyline, Brenda is accosted by an apparently stray dog whose incessant barking and generally disobedient behaviour increases Cindy's stress as she also contends with the bickering father and son, made worse by Jim's painful injury (Potter's naturally thick NY accent coming through much more noticeably when she has a meltdown amid the chaos).
It's a low-risk episode of little consequence, serving only to further cement Brandon's innate dislike of elitism and desire to address persecution and disadvantage whenever he encounters it, irrespective of the consequences (having not yet learned to pick his battles).
Brenda's character is shown to be no-less well-meaning albeit a little more haphazard in her execution, as a litany of failed pet experiences attests (poor Mr Pepper).
Beverly Hills, 90210: April Is the Cruelest Month (1991)
College pressure
Brandon is assigned to write a student profile on West Beverly's ace tennis player (Perry) but he soon finds that Roger is not the success he seems, as the contents of concerning screenplay gradually reveal.
Roger's interest in firearms and fast cars suggests a reckless streak which Brandon feels compelled to help treat. Meanwhile the girls are concerned about Donna's sudden change in attitude which is out of character for the usually low-risk teenager and maybe indicative of a personal crisis.
Perry's intense performance allied with his ensuing
fame and then tragic demise immortalises this sombre series one episode, the plot for which is mostly compelling but the execution of both strands superficial and unsatisfying.
The climax in both instances feels rushed, and the resolution seemed a little casual considering the heavy content with uneven acting /performances to match. Might've worked better had they separated the two stories, as Perry's storyline in particular needed its own episode to ventilate properly.
The Gold Rush (1925)
Rags to riches
Chaplin as the little tramp in Alaska during the gold rush, discovering the lovely Georgia (Hale) and her unlovely friends who tease and torment him relentlessly until his partner (Swain) stakes a huge claim.
Chaplin is the master of movement, and he showcases his unique ability to climb, leap, bend and contort as he's pulled from pillar and post in a trademark physical role whether it's evading the ire of a dance hall thug, or trying not to slide off a mountain cliff.
Timing is usually everything in slapstick, although the humour here is a bittersweet reflection of his character's loneliness and destitution, an outsider with limited prospects either in love or in life. Blends comedy, tragedy and romance effortlessly in a slightly overlong but nonetheless touching rags to riches story.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Fame Is Where You Find It (1991)
Hollywood 90210
Brandon finds himself in the right place at the right time when Hollywood beckons his photogenic talents, but he quickly learns that show business can be brutal. As the aspiring actress of the family, Brenda is quite upset at her brother's big break, and decides to use the opportunity backfilling his Peach Pit job to showcase her acting talents.
Doherty does an amusing job with her Boston/NY styled accent and sassy 50's-era waitress routine, and as a consequence of the situation, Joe E. Tata gets a little more screen time than usual which is good to see.
There's a number of 'in-jokes' and references to the perils of filmmaking which the characters lament (being acutely aware of these issues themselves no doubt), and the ex-West Beverly student who became a Golden Globe winner before the age of sixteen (Kaplan) isn't a total cliche, whilst she's not immune from displaying entitled behaviour, 'Lydia Leeds' does at least appear to appreciate that the attention she enjoys being a teen idol will be short-lived once her star inevitably fades.
Overall an easy-viewing episode with some fun insights on the experience of making television in which the cast gets to indulge in 'hyper-reality' versions of themselves.
Mortuary (1982)
Five funerals and a wedding
You've seen this movie before perhaps in a different setting - rejected introvert's jealousy for an unrequited romantic interest becomes a murderous obsession, in this instance, one he attempts to galvanise through his unique embalming skills honed from working at his father's mortuary.
Thin storyline attempts to pad things out with some weak and disconnected satanic rituals, and the plot contains little depth or imagination although the film manages to hold the interest when it focuses on the genre fundamentals.
Future film star Paxton performs his first leading role with apparent conviction albeit little assistance from the banal dialogue, whilst veteran movie couple Lynda Day (stunning in a particularly low-cut negligee) and Christopher George sleepwalk through their lead roles, headlining a competent cast that also includes Alvy Moore and co-producer Marlene Schmidt playing Wallace's parents.
Schmidt and husband Avedis ('The Teacher', 'The Fifth Floor') demonstrate they understand the formula well enough to make a passable slasher film, although the suspense doesn't always work; the climax in particular seemed poorly orchestrated with a lacklustre resolution (although possibly redeemed somewhat by the surprise ending) whereas the lengthy confrontation at McDonough's house is well-staged and delivers a few well-timed scares.
McDonough has a physical role notwithstanding a body double in the more revealing moments, Wallace as her concerned boyfriend has a natural ease about him and handles the lighter moments well although his character isn't as effective in the action sequences.
Between the scenes of frenzied mayhem (no exaggeration) there's disco roller boogie and the familiar college humour synonymous with slasher movies, but overall 'Mortuary' is mediocre and almost as soporific as it's expired residents.
Beverly Hills, 90210: It's Only a Test (1991)
When art imitates life
Intense episode hits a little close to home when Brenda performs a self examination on her breast tissue and discovers something of concern. The episode then explores her escalating fears as she undergoes the range of tests to determine its pathology (which is reflected by her mother's consternation, whose younger sister we learn succumbed to the disease several years earlier).
On a lighter note, Steve and Andrea find an unlikely common interest in preparing for the upcoming SAT exams, a source of great anxiety for subsequent college entrance, especially amongst those vying for an Ivy League offer.
The performances are mature in deference to the sensitive subject matter, with a very brief appearance by veteran actor Bart Braverman in Brenda's dream sequence which contemporaneously might've seemed corny, but in retrospect now seems dark and poignant.
It's hard to watch this episode now, and impossible not to be moved knowing that Doherty was performing a rehearsal for an encounter with the disease that would prematurely claim her life.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Stand (Up) and Deliver (1991)
You, me and my dad's hot tub
Lighthearted episode with Brandon reluctantly convinced to run for school president and Brenda seeking to find herself through creative expression, discovering that life in the big, wide world is not all it's cracked up to be.
West Beverly presidential elections are a hotly contested affair, and Kelly is enlisted to add her marketing flair to Brandon's campaign with mixed results.
Carol Burnett's daughter Hamilton guest stars as a struggling comedienne, showing Brenda that artists scrounge to make a living, and the comforts and controls of home are often better than the alternative.
Not the strongest episode, but Hamilton is realistic and the dialogue is occasionally priceless, David and Kelly enjoying the writing spoils with their trademark awkward romantic overtures (although I suspect David's hot tub fantasies will remain just that).
The Toolbox Murders (1978)
Driller killer of Camelot
Bloody and twisted are two words I'd use to describe this psychological thriller which spends too long in the mind of the sicko killer (and his precious doll), with not enough action nor storyline to maintain any sort of momentum.
Mitchell does what he does best (being versatile and affordable means he basically plays anything he's paid to perform) whilst Eure whose more closely associated with children's TV in 'Land of the Lost' plays an against-type character and Mitchell's unstable nephew. Tim Donnelly ('Emergency') also co-stars in his older brother's movie as a clueless detective.
Slow-moving with stilted dialogue and an uneasy underground feel is unable to mask the fact that there's clearly not enough material to sustain a feature length film. Consequently a large portion of the runtime (particularly the second half) is pointless padding including a lengthy ending staged with an apparent avant-garde intention, whilst on-screen text goes on to explain the subsequent events including the revelation that everything we just witnessed was allegedly fact.
Low-budget and amateurish although not without some creative interest, director Donnelly's vision is potentially too sadistic for a mainstream audience.
Beverly Hills, 90210: A Fling in Palm Springs (1991)
Advice for the young at heart
Palm Springs promises to be the big weekend on the social calendar but for Steve, David, Kelly and co it becomes a sage lesson on relationships when David's grandparents unexpectedly share their wisdom on long and successful unions. Meanwhile Brandon is learning an important life lesson in humility, and Brenda and Dylan discover that timing is everything after another coercive encounter.
The chemistry between Brenda and Dylan seems very genuine, and it's apparent their characters (and perhaps the actors playing them) are becoming familiar with one another's timing to the extent they're becoming quite an endearing couple (their final scene almost seems like Perry might've fluffed a line that they successfully managed to cover with some lighthearted banter).
Overall it's a fun, uncomplicated and reasonably lightweight episode with reliable support from veterans Yohn and Ruscio, a couple of chuckles, lots of skin, and a poignant moment each for Brandon and Dylan upon which to reflect.
Beverly Hills, 90210: Slumber Party (1991)
Car tricks and sleepover secrets
Secrets and lies dominate this early season one episode with Brandon and Steve roaming the nightlife in search of some innocent fun, instead picking a pair of vixens (McCullough & Aronson, both familiar faces from 80s horror movies) who might be more than their adolescent egos (and maturity) can handle.
Meanwhile Brenda is hosting a rather puerile sleepover at which the high-maintenance, ultra obnoxious Amanda (Abrams who had a prominent role in the 'Buffy' movie as a cheerleader) is a somewhat unwelcome guest of Kelly's, constantly bemoaning the fact that she's missing out on a frat party, whilst her allegedly juvenile friends indulge in ice-cream and school-yard gossip.
Things obviously get a bit heavier in both storylines, the girls sharing some uncomfortable truths whilst the boys rue their missed opportunities, and overall everything is resolved on a generally light-hearted note.
Beverly Hills, 90210: East Side Story (1991)
Latino 90210
Cutie Karla Montez (Montana) from East LA with a Mensa grade intellect transfers to 90210 for suspicious reasons piquing Brandon's romantic interest but he soon discovers she's forbidden fruit.
Montez is an enigma throughout most of the episode, and the intrigue it creates is basically the exclusive storyline with Brenda and co relegated to minor, incidental roles.
A little uneven in tone, it touches briefly on themes like migrant exploitation and racial stereotypes but the plot is fortunately not as haughty though it is resolved much too conveniently. A high energy and entertaining dance scene, exotic Montana and then an unexpected cameo by Debbie Gibson are highlights in this solid series one episode.