BAD BEHAVIOR IN SCHOOL
NISRINA NABILA SALMA 1SA02
1.1 Serious behaviour problems: Suggestions for teaching
staff
Children with behavioural diffi culties cause stress to those around them. As dealing
with students with diffi cult behaviours is stressful, make sure you have support from
colleagues. An effective discipline strategy needs to balance rules and consequences with
individual and specific support for positive behaviour. It is important to engage children in
learning and to build their belief that they can achieve at school. This can be achieved
through having frequent small successes.
5 Parenting Secrets for Improving Your Child’s Behavior
Being a good parent can be difficult. We are never really taught how to raise children
effectively, and generally tend to repeat behaviors we have learned from our own parents. If
we grew up in a dysfunctional environment, this can lead to our replicating the same
mistakes we witnessed and experienced as children when our turn to become parents
comes around.
Many parents who come to see me ask how they can learn better parenting skills. They
often feel ineffectual when trying to discipline their children, but do not know what they can
do differently. The following are some effective tools to use in order to bring about a little
more order in your household:
1. PRAISE YOUR CHILDREN
Any time you catch your child being good, make sure you let him or her know how
appreciative you are of his or her good behavior. Everyone responds in positive ways to
praise, children included, so this will encourage your child to behave in desirable ways.
2. USE BEHAVIORAL INCENTIVES
In order to inspire your kids to do their chores, put a chart or calendar up on the wall listing,
day by day, the tasks you want them to complete. This could include things such as taking
out the trash or setting the table for dinner, but you can also include behaviors such as
doing their homework, brushing their teeth, or being nice to siblings.
When the child performs the desired behaviors, he or she gets to put a sticker on the chart
for the day. As your child accumulates a certain number of stickers, he or she can earn
special incentives that are known ahead of time. These could be anything from choosing a
favorite dinner, going on a special outing, watching a movie that your child has been looking
forward to, or anything else he or she would enjoy.
For very young children, it can be helpful to break down the day into shorter periods in order
to reward desired behaviors more quickly. You may want to have them be able to earn three
stickers a day, for example—for the morning, afternoon, and evening. Even if they are not
successful for the entire day, they can at least be rewarded for shorter time periods and will
gradually want to earn more and more stickers and rewards.
3. USE CONSISTENT DISCIPLINE TECHNIQUES
When your children misbehave, they need to understand the specific behaviors you do not
want them to do. Let them know what they are doing wrong, then provide a warning. Your
explanations should be very clear and simple, so that they understand exactly which were
the problem behaviors.
When your children misbehave, they need to understand the specific behaviors you do not want
them to do.
If a child continues to misbehave, put him or her in a designated area away from the rest of
the family that has been chosen for time-outs. Make sure that the child remains in the
designated spot for the entire time-out period. The time-out should not last more than
several minutes, but the child should not be allowed to talk or play during this time.
At the end of the time-out period, reiterate to your child the reason that he or she was put in
time-out and ask for an apology. Consistency is very important when it comes to teaching
children appropriate behavior, so the time-out strategy should be used every time your child
misbehaves after having been given an initial, unheeded warning.
4. COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR CHILD
If your child is acting uncharacteristically poorly, attempt to find out what may be going on.
Children have a tendency to act out when they are being picked on at school or
sense tension within the family. Try talking with them to find out if they are upset about
something you are unaware of so you can address any potential problems.
5. MAINTAIN A STRUCTURED ROUTINE
Children respond well to structure, so try to have meals and bedtime at the same time every
day. When kids become overly tired, they may be more prone to acting out, so make sure
they are getting enough rest.
Using the techniques above can help to make for a more peaceful home environment. If you
are still having problems managing your child’s behavior or your child has recently become
more fearful, angry, or aggressive, meeting with a psychotherapist may be helpful in order
to explore the underlying reasons for the behaviors and to get your child back on track.
Stay calm, cool, and collected.
The initial communication and description of the “crime” can be like a punch to the stomach
for most parents. It’s important to stay calm. Remember that you did not commit the offense,
your child did. Try not to laugh it off as no big deal. Remaining cool and collected is the key
to dealing with the teacher or the administrator in an effective and proactive manner. It’s our
job, after all, to stay in control and not equate their mishaps with our own parenting
insecurities. Teachers and administrators don’t like making the call as much as we don’t
like receiving it.
Believe the teacher or the
administrator.
Hear the story. Get the facts. It’s important to entertain the possibility that your child may lie
through their teeth to get out of facing any consequences. Newsflash: All kids lie
sometimes. They will lighten the story to make it seem like it wasn’t a big deal. They will
stretch the truth and supply a multitude of excuses. Or they will exaggerate their lack of
involvement to get the desired lenient response. And they often simply omit crucial details.
Good kids do this because they do not want to disappoint their parents.
Get the facts and avoid entertaining the reasons why it happened. (You can talk about those
later.) The focus should remain on addressing the specific action or behavior.
Believe your child too.
It’s okay to hash out the circumstances, but we must demand honesty. Make your child own
their mistake. Accountability is a key building block of becoming an adult, and the time to
teach it is during these moments. Dismiss any other child involved from the equation because
it’s your child that you are concerned with, and your child is your responsibility.
Agree to the punishment.
It’s important to present a united front with children. If the teacher says no recess for a week,
with a written letter of apology, then that is exactly what your child must do — even if they
miss some fun things. No exceptions and no negotiations. You are not your child’s lawyer.
You can certainly add your own sanctions at home, but don’t go overboard unless the crime
is huge. Let the punishment stand at school. After all, your child didn’t commit the infraction
at home.
Talk about natural consequences.
If you are catching wind that your child isn’t exactly an angel, it’s a good idea to have a long
talk with them about natural consequences. When Billy brings up the fact that no one will
play with him at recess, remind him that maybe it’s because he hogs the ball all the time.
When Susie is upset that the other girls don’t invite her to play, remind her that maybe she
should stop teasing them. Do this lovingly, of course.
As much as we hate labels, people aren’t labeled as class clowns, liars, cheaters, or bullies for
absolutely no reason. Pay attention to how your child is acting in social situations. Natural
consequences for detrimental behavior may take a little while, but they do tend to work.
