HEISENBERG

1M, 1\(/.
by Simon Stephens
HEISENBERG
Arnidst the bustle of a crorvded l.ondon tr:rin station, Georgie spots Alex,
mtrch older man, and plants a kiss or.r his ncck. This electric encourltcr thrusts
a
BYSIMON STEPHENS
thesc rwo strangers into a f.rscinating ancl life-changing garne. Simon Stephcn!
sharply original HEISENBITR(} brings to blazing, theatrical life the uncerrain
and oftcn comical sparring match that is human connection.

"On its su(ace, IHEISENBIiRGJ is a sttifuingly seniintetfial, life-affrning

tnating dance betutcen two pcoplc ulto arc so utter[r dissirnilnr that of course thelr F'
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drc ,nddefor eaclt othcr. But iflou cltoose to tturc into thc quictcrJivqtrcncies, you'll LlJ

detcct the presencc of a probing worle that cottsiders the multiplicity of alternatiucs z
that could shape otn" liues d.t cuel)t tnontent, " NewYorkTimes F4
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"Stcpltcm's gt"eat inter"st ... is lnw our perccption of peoltlc and relationships I
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ahcrs dependirry ott tubat tuc krow, uhat we see and whosc sida rue see itf om. H
Seemingly sensclcss dctions t/trtt scent ineqtlicablc rcuenl rcasonable motiucs; Frl

solid frcx dissiptttc nnd disappetr. [HEISENRI|RGJ reruards utarching, both

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wherc it is and wberc iti goittg. The Guardian zv)
"[Simort Stepheml tells the simplc stzr! of tu)o pnfect strangus w/to cmbnrk on
an ffiir andfnd thcir liues cltangcs irreuocabll. Yoube seett this one beforc, yorr
say? Not likc this otrc, 1lu haucn't. ... Geotg'ic is a maruelotts credtio,x: a ruidc-
eyed, brutally honest id ... and Stcpbcns fgiucsJ full cotrntritrnent to these lost
souk through ltis touglt, brucing writing sqrlc. "
-Entertainment'Weeldy

Also by Simon Stephens ISBN:1)7tl *

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DRAMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, INC,
BYSIMON STEPHENS

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 HEISENBERG The world premiere of HEISENBERG was commissioned and
Copyright @ 2015, Simon Stephens
presented by Manhattan Theatre Club (Lynne Meadow, Artistic
All Rights Reserved Director; Barry Grove, Executive Producer) on May 19,20L5, as
part of the Harold and Mimi Steinberg New Play Series. It was
CAUTION: Professionals and amateurs are hereby warned that perFormance of
FIEISENBERG is subject to payment of a royalry. It is fully protected under the directed by Mark Brokaw; the set design was by Mark'Wendland;
copyright laws ofthe United States ofAmerica, and ofall counrries covered by the the costume design was by Michael Krass; the lighting design was
lnternational Copyright Union (including the Dominion of Canada and rhe rest o[ by Donald Holder; the sound design was by David van Tiegham;
the British Commonwealth), and of all countries covered by rhe Pan-American
Copyright Convention, the Universal Copyright Convention, the Berne the choreographer was Sam Pinkleton; and the production stage
Convention, and of all countries wirh which rhe Unired Srates has reciprocal manager was David Sugarman. The cast was as follows:
copyright relations. All rights, including without limitation profcssional/amareur
motion picture, recitation, lecturing, public reading, radio broadcasting,
stage rights,
television, video or sound recording, all other forms of mechinical, electronic and
GEORGIE BURNS Mary-Louise Parker
digital reproduction, transmission and distribution, such as CD, DVD, the ALEX PzuEST Denis Arndt
Internet, private and file-sharing nenvorks, information storage and retrieval
systems, photocopying, and the rights of translation into foleign languages are
strictly reserved. Particular emphasis is placed upon the matter of readings,
permission for which must be secured.from the Authort agent in wriring.

The English language stock and amateur stage pellormance rights in the United
States, its territories, possessions and Canada ior HEISENBERG are controlled
exclusively by DMMATISTS PLAY SERVICE, INC., 440 Park Avenue South,
New York, NY 10016. No professional or nonprofessional performance of the
Play may be given without obtaining in advance the written permission o[
DRAMAIISTS PLAY SERVICE, INC., and paying the requisite fee.

lnquilies concerning all other rights should be addressed ro Casarot(o Ramsay &
Associates, Ltd., Vaverlcy House, T-l2 Noel Strect, London, \WlF BGQ. Attn:
Mel Kenyon.

SPECIALNOTE
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SPECIAL NOTE ON SONGS AND RECORDINGS

For perlormances ofcopyrighted songs, arrangements or recordings rnentioned in
these Plays, the permission of rhe copyright owner(s) must be obtained. Other
songs, arrangements or recordings may be substituted provided permission lrom
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 CHARACTERS

GEORGIE BURNS is 42 years old. She is from New Jersey.

ALEX PRIEST is 75 years old. He is from Enniscorthy,

County -Wexford. HEISENBERG
PLACE Scene I
London.
p.u.
The forecourt of St. Panras railwalt station. 6:25

TIME
ALEX. It's fine.
The present day. GEORGIE. Itt not.
ALEX. it really is.
GEORGIE. Itt just weird. I feel awful.
ALEX. You mustnt.
The stage should be as bare as possible. GEORGIE. I do.
The walls of the theatre should be revealed. Dont tell me how I must or mustnt feel.
The lighting rig should be rwealed. ALEX. I'm sorry.
If any props are used at all they should be revealed and remain (They loob at each other.)
onstage throughout. GEORGIE. I'm going to go.
ALEX. Okay.
(They loob at each other.)
\flere you supposed to be meeting him here?
GEORGIE. No. \)7hat gives you that impression?
AIEX. Nothing. Just.
'Woman
GEORGIE. You're just joining the dots. walks up to man.
He's,sitting down minding his own business.
ALEX. You kissed the back of my neck.
GEORGIE. I know, right? "\(hat the fuck are you doing?"
(Beat.)
Kind of thing.
ALEX. That kind of thing, yes.
GEORGIE. I'm so sorry for swearing.
ALEX. Dont be.
GEORGIE. I swear all the time. Sometimes I dont even notice it.
Sometimes it just pops right out of my mouth.
AIEX. It doesnt bother me in the least. I like a good swear. ALEX. \Mhat?
GEORGIE. I have a complete inabiliry to control my own language. GEORGIE. Your smile.
ALEX. Ha. ALEX. \il/hat about it?
GEORGIE. I wasnt. Expecting to meet him. He wasnt going to GEORGIE. Can I take your photograph?
be here. Thatt not what I was doing at all. I think thatt why I was ALEX. Why?
so surprised. GEORGIE. I like to take peoplet photographs. I do it allthe time. I
ALEX. I see. do it with loads of people. I ve got millions of the things. Sometimes
GEORGIE. He died eighteen months ago. it's fun to take photographs of complete strangers. The idea is to freeze
He had a heart attack. He was all alone in our flat. Nobody found out them. Itt completely private. It's just something I do.
until I got home later that night. He'd been on his own for six hours. ALEX. I dont think that's a good idea, do you?
He'd been alive for about forry-five minutes after the heart attack. GEORGIE. 'Mhy not?
Flailing around. Tryirg to attract somebodyt attention. Failing. ALEX. I d really rather you didnt. Thank you.
I'm so sorry. \7as that an unnecessary act ofconfession? GEORGIE. Is it because you're a celebriry?
ALEX. Not, no. No. No. It must have been a bit of a surprise to ALEX. \X/hat? No. I'm not a celebriry. \Mhy would I mind having
imagine youU seen him again. my photograph taken if I was a celebrity? Isnt that kind of in their
GEORGIE. It was. It was. It really was. I'm Georgie. job description?
ALEX. Hello Georgie. Alex. GEORGIE. Is it because you're a very arrogant person?
GEORGIE. Georgie Burns. ALEX. No.
ALEX. Alex Priest. GEORGIE. Do you imagine yourself to be a little bit above people
GEORGIE. This is all very formal isn't it? like me?
ALEX. I suppose it is. ALEX. Not in any way.
GEORGIE. "Georgie Burns. How very nice to rneet you. Alex GEORGIE. You do,I bet.
Priest. Charmed, I'm sure." ALEX. I dont.
ALEX. Yes. GEORGIE. Then why wont you let me take your photograph?
GEORGIE. Dont panic. I'm going now. It's because you're shy. Isnt it? I can tell. I can read you like a flipping
ALEX. I wasnt panicking. book. Thatt one of my skills. Readir-rg people. Itt a professional
GEORGiE. I like it here. characteristic. It comes with my job.
ALEX. Yes. ALEX. \Vhat job do you do?
GEORGIE. I like train stations on the whole. Are you waiting GEORGIE. I'm an assassin.
for somebody? I'm not really.
ALEX. No. AI-EX. Arent you?
GEORGIE. Are you waiting for a train? GEORGIE. No. I'm a waitress. Gosh. I bet that's a rather over-
ALEX. No. powering disappointmenr isnt it. "Crikey," he thinks, "a real assassin.
GEORCIE. You're just sitting here. You don't meet an assassin every day of your lifel Oh no. Shet not
ALEX. That's right. an assassin. Shet a fucking waitress."
GEORGIE. That's good. I like that idea. Itt good, sitting, isnt it? ALEX. I didnt think that.
ALEX. It is, I think. GEORGIE. Yeah you did. You lying fucker. Sorry. I didnt mean
GEORGIE. Thke the weight offyour feet. that to be quite as rude as it must have seemed.
(He smiles at her.) ALEX. I like waitresses.
Gosh. GEORGIE. Do you?
ALEX. Some of them. Not all of them. That would be absurd. ALEX. lVhy are you talking to me?
To make a blanket generalisation like that. Some waitresses are GEORGIE. I'm sorry. I m really weird. I know. You dont need to
really lovely. tell me. I'll go.
GEORGIE. I work at Ottolenghi's. Itt just. Days like this. Theret something about them isnt there?
ALEX. Terrific. AIEX. I honestly have no idea what you're talking about.
GEORGIE. Do you know it? GEORGIE. I miss every single bit of him.
ALEX. No. ALEX. I see.
GEORGIE. It's on Upper Street. In Islington. It sells a fusion of GEORGIE. Itt like I miss him in my skin and my bones and my
continental, North African, and oriental food, driven by a scientific blood. I miss him on a cellular level.
determination to pursue culinary excellence to its highest lwel. \7e never had children. \X/hich is one thing. I dont regret it. I do redly.
ALEX. Magic. I live in Islington too. Bet you wouldnt think that to look at me,
GEORGIE. I like science. would you? I bet youd think I lived somewhere like, I dont know,
AIEX. Yes. Acton or something.
GEORGIE. So I ve seen your type before. ALEX. Y/hy Acton?
ALEX. Right. GEORGIE. Because I look normal. I dont look extremely bloody
GEORGIE. The shy, brooding, intellectual rype. You come in. You rich. But let me tell you there are parts of Islington that are still,
sit down. You order a croissant. You read a fucking poem. Or some- even now, affordable.
thing. Youte too shy to smile. Youre too shy to tip. You leave. I'm ALEX. Great.
right aren't I? Ive got you down to a tee. Dont you try and think GEORGIE. I love it there. I wander up and down Liverpool Road.
youVe got the measure of me, mister man. 'Cause on the contrary, Go into the shops. Rummage about. Go to work. Go to the theatre
I have the measure of you. there. Go to the cinema there. Theret something about cities that
ALEX. I never said for one second that I thought I had the measure just makes me really fucking h"ppy. It's the monumental amount
ofyou. of people. The gaps in between them creates this crackle.
GEORGIE. Some of the food we make is astonishing to me. It's I do like the countryside too though, by the way.
like it sets offa small explosion in my mouth. It's transformative. It ALEX. Good for you.
transports me to places I've never been to. It takes me to the corners GEORGIE. I like sitting in silent rooms in the countryside. I like
of Europe in my mouth. It takes me to areas of northern A-frica. silent rooms. I like silent rooms and the electric crackle of most
Have you ever been to Africa? given cities.
ALEX. I've never been anywhere. \Vhat job do you do?
GEORGIE. IU love to go to Africa. I dont think I've been to ALEX. I'm a butcher.
enough places in my life where things could happen to you that are GEORGIE. No you're not.
completely unpredictable and which could honestly and properly AIEX. Yes I am,I'm afraid.
just kill you. Do you like food? GEORGIE. fue you?
ALEX. Yes. Yes. Yes. I like food perfectly well. ALEX.'$7hat?
GEORGIE. I have been to Thailand though. GEORGIE. Really?
ALEX. Jolly good. ALEX. Yes.
GEORGIE. My husband took me to Thailand for our honeymoon. GEORGIE. A butcher?
-We '!7hat's
drank cocktails in pools with bar stools actually in the pools. And AIEX. Yes. so strange about that?
had massages on the beach. It was sublime. GEORGIE. Is that really your job?
He was English. He was the reason I came to London. ALEX. This is getting a bit cyclical.
GEORGIE. 'Wow. ALEX. Nice word.
ALEX. \il/hat? GEORGIE. Thank you. Ha. "Nice word." Patronising fucker.
GEORGIE. You have a very unusual vocabulary for a butcher. I've I'm not really a waitress.
never met a butcher in my life that has complained that a conversation lied about that.
was getting cyclical. You're not a butcher at all are you? made it up.
ALEX. I'm going. do that kind of thing quite a lot.
GEORGIE. You're lil<e a professor or something. A librarian. You I dont work at Onolenghit. I've never even earen there. Only toast.
run an antiquated bookshop. liTheret your shop if you're a butcher? I ve had toast there b"6r.. And hot chocolate. But never anfhing
Ifyoure a butcher, Mr. Butcher, where's your butchert shop? more expensive than that. I've certainly never worked on their waitinf
ALEX. Goodbye.
1atr Not there_or anywlere in fact. I've neverwaited tables in mylifel
GEORGIE. Don't go. Not even on school holidays. Ifyou took me now from where we are
ALEX. 'Why not? and put me in the middle ofa busy or even a semi-busy restaurant and
GEORGIE. I .iust enjoy having you here. told me just ro get on with it, I wouldnt know where io ,t*rt. I mean.
I could hazard a guess. But thatt all I d be depending on. Guesswork.
Entirely. I dont live in Islington. I live in clapton. irrhi.h is close to
Islington, to be fair, but in many ways a very differenr area altogether.
Scene 2 I've never even been inside the theatre. Oi that particular cinlma. I
mean I've been to lots of cinemas. But rr.u.., .r.. that one. Never. I
work as a receptionist at a primary school. St. pault. Behind the
Fiue days later. Alex Priesti shop. Hollingsworth Estate. I really enjoy it. I like the children and their
parents. I have no idea why I didnt just admit that right out.
I've never been married. I ve never been to Thailand. I think itt
ALEX. '$7hat are you doing here? probably best ifyou assume that werything I told you when I sawyou
GEORGIE. That's not very friendly. lastweek was. a complete fabrication. I love it. Mj.ing thi.rg, ,.rp. 'B,lt
ALEX. No. I left you behind and I thought that I really enjoyJ *.J.irg yo,r,
GEORGIE. "Oh hi Georgie, how are you? I've not seen you for and I kind ofwanted tomeer you again and i though,, .r.rr,trjly irt
days. You're looking well. I like your top. \7hat about all this going to get unsustainable. I might as well track you down and tefl
weather we've been having, eh?" you, you know, the truth about me and who I am. If you want to
ALEX. How did you find out where I worked? shout reallyloud swear words at me at rhis point I can honestly s"y
GEORGIE. How do you think? that I wouldnt hold that against you in ,ny r.rr..
ALEX. I honestly have no idea. (Some time. He stares at her. He thinhs.)
GEORGIE. I googled you. ALEX. I dont.
ALEX.'What? GEORGIE. Don't you?
GEORGIE. I googled you. Alexander Priest. Butcher. London. Easy. AIEX. No.
ALEX. I dont know what to say about that. GEORGIE. You should. I would if I were you.
GEORGIE. There's something I need to tell you. AIEX. You're not me.
ALEX. Itt like youre spying on me. GEORGIE. Clearly. I mean clearly. I mean that would just be
GEORGIE. I am. I'm not really. I am kind of. weird. Either if I actually was you or if I was labouring under the
ALEX. My privacy has been violated. illusion that I was you. That would be weird too. Are you a bit
GEORGIE. "Violated" is a bit strong. "Violated" is a bit hyperbolic. freaked our now?

l0 11
ALEX. A little. GEORGIE. Do you find me exhausting but captivating?
GEORGIE. In a bad way or in a kind o[, "Oh this is interesting, I (He loohs at her.)
wonder what's going to happen next," kind of way? (He tbinbs.)
ALEX. \Xrhy did you enjoy meeting me? \(hat do you like best about being a butcher?
GEORGIE. I have no idea, really. I think I must be just drawn to (He looks at her.)
your shyness. Is that a bit crazy? It m1y well be. I think l may well (He thinkl)
be, half of the time' But life is a bit fucking crazy too sometimes' ALEX. I like the animals.
Don't you think? Don't you think Alex? GEORGIE. The animals?
I do. ALEX. I like the way animals join together. I like that they have seams.
ALEX. I'm not shy. GEORGIE. Seams?
GEORGIE. Dont you think? AIEX. Joining them together.
AIEX. I'n-r not. GEORGIE. Animals have seams? Like, like, like clothes?
GEORGIE. You might not feel shy, but believe me, Long John ALEX. Precisely. I like very much the idea that a cow has a seam
Silver, I know a shy man when I see one. and knowing exactly where that is.
ALEX. I hate that idea. GEORGIE. lVell. Animals have seams. I'm a little bit staggered by
GEORGIE. \(hich idea is that idea? that idea I have to confess.
ALEX. The idea of "feeling" shy. People are so obsessed with feelings AIEX. I like knives.
nowadays. It's all anybody err.r talks-about. It's ludicrous' You cant GEORGIE. Do you?
go anywhere without these fucking wretched conversations about ALEX. Alot.
F.eling, being shoved down your throat. Literally down your throat. GEORGIE. \What's your favourite knife?
\Tith"clenchid fists. I feel my clothes and the wind on my face' I ALEX. I used to have a Forschner boning knife. That was terrific.
dont feel. I fucking think' GEORGIE. It sounds it.
(She looks at him,) AIEX. Itwas.
(She smiles.) GEORGIE. I like your fingers.
GEORGIE. Itt very quiet in here isnt it? ALEX. Mywhat?
ALEX. It is rather. GEORGIE. I can't help noticing your fingers. They kind of leap
GEORGIE. Is it always like this? out at you.
ALEX. Sometimes' Not alwaYs. ALEX. My fingers?
GEORGIE. Am I the first customer you've had all day? GEORGIE. Is that an unnerving observation?
ALEX. Not the first, no. ALEX. I dont know about "unnerving."
GEORGIE. And I ve not even bought anything yet' GEORGIE. I bet youre really good at tickling people arent you?
ALEX. I noticed that' ALEX. i dont really know. I ve not tickled anybody in a really terribly
GEORGIE. If I'm completely honest, I'm not entirely sure.I'm long time.
tWhatt your.best GEORGIE. Thatt a shame. Do you play the piano?
even going to. I wouldnt know where to start..
meatfuo."Don't answer that. \7hat did your other customers buy? AIEX. No.
No, dont answer that either. Do you like running your own shop? GEORGIE. Are you a really skilled finger-clicker.
ALEX. I do sometimes. It can be a little demanding' AIEX. Not really. Not. No.
GEORGIE. I fucking bet it can. Do you have to keep this place GEORGIE. Youre wasting them.
immaculately clean? AIEX. Am I?
ALEX. You do, yes'

12 13
 -What
GEORGIE. You're blessed with a skeletal peculiarity and you're GEORGIE. do you do with your days offwhen you have them?
basically, you know, pissing it up the wall. I did use the word "pissing" ALEX. I go for walks
on purpose just then by the way. Because I know how happy my GEORGIE. Forwalks?
swearing makes you. ALEX. Yes. \7alks.
The things I do for you. I ve not even known you a week. GEORGIE. lVhere?
You know what you should do? ALEX. AII over London.
ALEX. lMhat? GEORGIE. London?
GEORGIE. Thke me out. ALEX. Thatt right.
ALEX. Ha. GEORGIE. Just London?
GEORGIE. That wasnt meant to be the funny bit. That was meant ALEX. Hm-hmm.
to be the serious bit. You werent meant to laugh at that line. Shit. GEORGIE. But you live in London, Alex. You dont go to Brighton
This weather. or anphing like that?
Itt uncharacteristically warm. ALEX. No.
ALEX. It is. I dont trust it. GEORGIE. You dont go to the countryside.
GEORGIE. \Mhat? AIEX. I've never really been a huge fan of the countryside.
ALEX. The weather? GEORGIE. You are a very strange man Alexander Priest.
GEORGIE. Is weather something that it's possible to trust now? ALEX. I'm not in the least bit strange.
ALEX. This is how the end of rhe world will happen, you know GEORGIE. You are. You're stealthy. You creep up on people. You're
that, dont you? a_canny mover. I bet secretly you're a wily old fox. I bet you're a great
GEORGIE. -Mhat? I'm sorry. dancer. Arent you? Are you? My God you are, arent you?
ALEX. It won't end through a cataclysmic nuclear explosion. It ALEX. I am as a marter of fact.
won't see people tearing into the streets. It won't involve an atomic GEORGIE. I knew you would be.
catastrophe. People will just notice, bit by bit, how itt getting ever ALEX. I'm fucking brilliant.
so warmer, a little bit warmer every day, and eventually they'll start (She smiles at his swearing.)
to become so warm they wont be able to move properly. GEORGIE. Cool. I love dancing. Itt one of my absolutely world-
GEORGIE. Do you work here on your own? class top-time all-time favourite things to do in the world.'
ALEX. I do yes. ALEX. I tango.
GEORGIE. There's nobody else? GEORGIE. Do you? Do you really? \Tillyou teach me?
ALEX. No. ALEX. No.
GEORGIE. I'm not surprised. If I had a shop and it was as quiet as GEORGIE,. \7hAt?
this I'd work on my own. Out of embarrassment as much as anything. ALEX. I dont teach. I dance with other dancers. Go and learn.
rMhat do you do when you want a day ofr llen come back and ask me again.
ALEX. I close the shop. GEORGIE. Are you being serious?
GEORGIE. Yes. That's logical. Stupid question really. Duh Georgie. AIEX. Don't I look serious?
\7hat about when you want to go on holiday? GEORGIE. Is this you laying down a gauntlet? Are you setting me
ALEX. I dont go on holiday. a challenge? You do realize that it's a challenge predicated on the
GEORGIE. 'What do you mean you dont? idea thaisecretly you would like me ,o .o.ri. fack and see you
ALEX. I've never been on holiday. again, dont you?
GEORGIE. Never? I promise to buy a surprising amollnt of meat next rime,
ALEX. Not for, well, not since I was a child. I'm tired.

14 15
I've not been sleeping. I cant keep my eyes closed at nighttime. I could never decide if that was massively complimentary or just a
wake up.
'With the clearest most horrible sense of falling. bit fucking, you know, rude.
\fhat are the things that you think I should know before we go out I've never spoken about this before. I've never spoken as honestly as
on our date? this about anything before. It feels a bit like having an electric
ALEX. Our date? I'm sorry. I never agreed to go on a date with you. shock. It feels very strange.
GEORGIE. Not yet, you havent. Do you think you'd enjoy that?
ALEX. I haven't agreed to go on a date with anybody. ALEX.'What?
GEORGIE. I ve got a son. Thatt one thing about me. And that is GEORGIE. Speaking in a made-up language with me?
absolutely the total God's-honest truth. He's nineteen. He hardly ALEX. Not really. No. No.
'We
comes home. Ever. GEORGIE. could just shift a few letters round.
In fact he never does. ALEX. No.
I want him to. I dont knowwhat I'm supposed to have done wrong. GEORGIE. \7e should cust lift a few jetters around.
I dont know what I did to upset him. He wanders around with his AIEX. I have no idea how you expect me to respond to that.
head in his technology all the time. I think it must be that. GEORGIE. I nave ho idea yow hou expect re to mespond to that. I
It'llpass. AII this. This technology and this money and this illness wish I spoke another language properly. Can you speak any languages?
and this exhaustion. It has to. \7e can't carry on at this rate. Maybe ALEX. No.
itt not a bad thing. The technology will close down. The shops will GEORGIE. None?
close down. The banks will all fail. Our money will disappear. And ALEX. No.
the really interesting thing about that is what do we do then?'What GEORGIE. God, youte actually a lot more boring than you seem
happens next? in real life arent you?
ALEX. \Vhat?
GEORGIE. I'd love to go and see him. Jump on the Eurostar. Find
the fucker. I d punch him in the face. I have no idea if het still in
Scene 3 touch with Jason. I'd love to find out. I wouldnt dare.
ALEX. Jason?
GEORGIE. Our boy. My son.
A Turhish restaurutnt in Holborn. 11 p.u. That food was lovely.
ALEX. Yrs.
GEORGIE. I liked the bread, especially.
GEORGIE. I loved him, I did. I never married him but I did love ALEX. The fatbread?
him, honest injun. I did. He lives in Amsterdam now. I have no GEORGIE. Yes. And this wine is fucking terrific.
idea what he does with his life. I imagine he smokes a fair amount ALEX. It's Lebanese.
of marijuana. \Vho could blame him really? Living there. You may GEORGIE. Is it?
as well. ALEX. Yes it is.
He's a very gentle man. Het very imaginative. VeU speak in a kind GEORGIE. And I like the art. On the walls. And the music. And
of code together. \7e spoke in a made-up language. I do think he your eyes. Quite a lot, actually. Your eyes are betrer than the wine
kind of saved me from my parents. It was just that after a few years and the music and the art and the flatbread put together. \7as that
he kept saving other girls from various situations too. He got a real an amazingly embarrassing thing to say?
taste for it. Especially if they were quite a bit younger than he was. AIEX. No.
Every girl he went with always looked a little bit like me and I GEORGIE. How old are you?

r5 t7
AIEX. I'm seventy-five. together and they completely agreed on that. If you pay attention to
(She gets the giggles,) where it's going or how fast it's moving you stop watching it propedy.
\[hyt that funny? I watched him all the time. He took me completely by surprise.
GEORGIE. I'm sorry. I'm not trying to be rude. Seventy-five? Are Every man I meet looks exactly like him. They have the same hair
you really? and the same eyes. They move in the same way. Theyve got the
ALEX. Yes I am. same breathing.
GEORGIE. You're unbelievably old. You were like thirty-three You dont though. Remind me of him. You're exceptional, in that
when I was born. Oh my God, Thatt amazing to me. sense.
I'm sorry. Tell me something. I feel like all I ve been doing all evening is
I'm calming down now talking. I always do. Itk because I'm terrified of what people really
There. I'm calm. think of me. In the end I do know that people will reject me so I
There. I'm so sorry. try to behave in a way that just speeds the whole process up, but
ALEX. Dont apologise. It's actually surprisingly nice. I really want this to be in some way different. I really do. I do.
GEORGIE. li7hat is? Largely because ofyour eyes.
AIEX. \Watching you giggle. ALEX. I cant think.
lVhatt Jason like? GEORGIE. Please. Throw me a line. Just a tidbit. Give me something
GEORGIE. Do you want the honest answer to that or a made-up to hold on to. Surprise me.
one? I'll give you an honest one. I have absolutely no idea. I've not ALEX. I find this kind of thing a bit tricky.
seen him for rwo years. GEORGIE. I know.
Two years ago he went back to the U.S. He went to live with a ALEX. Just thinking up things to say. It feels a little random. A
girlfriend in Chicago. He told me he was sick of me. He told me he little arbitrary.
was sick to the back of his teeth with me and my ways and that I GEORGIE. Just try. Just for me.
was an embarrassment and that he found me mortifying and he ALEX. I'm going to sell my shop.
wanted to go back home and see what that was like. GEORGIE. Gosh.
He wanted to get in touch with his North American roots. Dick. ALEX. \Mhat?
I had a letter from him. Eighteen months ago. He wrote to me from GEORGIE. I wasnt expecting that.
NewJersey. He said he'd met another girl. He was very happy. He was ALEX. No?
in love with her. They married each other without telling anybody. GEORGIE. I was expecting something a bit more personal if I'm
They were talking about one day having children. He very much being really honest with you, Alex.
wanted me to know that he didnt want to see me again. He wasnt ALEX. I see.
going to ever come home. He wasnt going to invite me over to see GEORGIE. Not just concerned with the functioning, pragmatic
him. He was breaking offall contact with me and had no intention of elements of your working life.
establishing that contact again. I thought I'd go and try and find him. AIEX. I'm sorry.
ALEX. \7hY? GEORGIE. Thatt all right. I forgive you completely and with
GEORGIE. Because het my son. immediate effect. ril/hy are you going to sell the shop?!
ALEX. Yes. AIEX. Because itt losing so much money.
GEORGIE. If yor,r watch something closely enough you realize you GEORGIE. fught. Better. Good. \[hy's it losing so much money?
have no possible way of telling where it's going or how fast itt getting AIEX. Because nobody buys their meat from butchers anymore.
there. Did you know that? That's actually the truth. That's actually GEORGIE. See you've gone all boring again, now. Have you got a
scientifically been proven as the truth. By scientists. Th.y all got lot of money that you can afford to lose?

18 19
ALEX. Some. You dont know anybody who wants to buy some GEORGIE. I cant decide if that's the saddest thing I ve ever heard
shop space do you? Ideally a butcher. But not necessarily. Itt fitted or just abit lazy.
out for butchery at the moment, but that could all change very ALEX. No.
quickly. I'm too old for the struggle. I'm losing my spirit of fight. GEORGIE. Dont you have any nephews or nieces?
Nobody comes in. Not very often. Occasionally for sausages. Not ALEX. No I dont.
really though. I can spend hours sitting there. Staring out of the GEORGIE. Dont you have any brothers or sisters?
window. I'm not altogether sure that it's good for me. ALEX. I had a sister. She died when I was eight years old.
GEORGIE. Dont you have any children you could hand it down to? GEORGIE. Fucking hell.
AIEX. Children? Of course not. \fhy would I have children? ALEX. \fhat?
GEORGIE. I dont know I dont know anything about you. Literally GEORGIE. Youie not exactly very lucky are you?
nothing. Did you never have children? ALEX. I know.
AIEX. No. GEORGIE. tVhen was that? You unluclry bastard.
GEORGIE. Did you never get married or anything? AIEX. Just after the end of the war. l947.1here was something
ALEX. No. rather ironic about it. All over the world people were celebrating the
GEORGIE. Never? fact that their children had survived. I dont remember a great deal
AIEX. No. about the time when she died but my parents told me afterwards that
GEORGIE. Shit. I didnt speak for three weela. I didnt say a word to anybody.
ALEX. \7hat? I think about her every day.
GEORGIE. Seventy-five. Never been married. Itt just a little bit I dream about her.
fucking, what, drab? Sorry. That was another example of my inabiliry I talk to her in my dreams sometimes.
to keep my stupid fucking mouth shut even at the best of times GEORGIE. \What do you say to her?
wasnt it? ALEX. 'Well I say I talk to her. She talks to me, mainly.
AIEX. Yes, it was rather. GEORGIE. Yeah. That figures. \[hat does she talk to you about?
GEORGIE. I'm so sorry. ALEX. She tells me what its like to be dead and she tells me about
ALEX. I nearly did. outer space and she tells me about the universe. I think it's largely
GEORGIE. Nearly? becausi of her that I have no fear of death. My family moved over
ALEX. A.nd then I didnt in the end. There was a girl called Joanne to London from Ireland when I was eleven. I think part of their
Downey who I knew for a short time in my twenties and although we reasoning was to help me get over the sadness. I'm sorry to say that
were very young we did talk about getting married to one another. At it didnt ieally work and it kind of had the opposite effect.
'When
the time I was rather committed to the idea of marriage and she was GEORGIE. you go for your walks is there part of you that
too, I think. But she became more committed to the idea of marrying thinks you might bump into her?
somebody else and without announcing anything to suggest that it \flhat about yo.t. p"t.tttt? Are they still alive? No. Of course they're
was likely or even possible, she broke offour engagement at the end not. You're sevenry-five. That would be mental. \Vhen did they die
of the fifties. is what I really meant to ask, and I would have asked if I d thought
GEORGIE. Bummer. about it for more than a few seconds'
ALEX. Quite. ALEX. My mother died when I was seventeen.
GEORGIE. The fifties? GEORGIE. Shit.
ALEX. Thatt right. ALEX. She was diagnosed with lung cancer and died within two
GEORGIE. And that was the last? weeks. My father take it. He lived for five more months'
"o,rld.r't
ALEX. Yes. It was.

20 2t
And then he just died. He crumpled up and folded himself into a AIEX. Yes I am.
GEORGIE. You're not so much a creature of routine as a psycho-
coffin. He couldnt bear it.
pathic raging monster of it.
GEORGIE. \(hat did you do?
And then I come along.
ALEX. I joined the British Army' \7hich was maybe unusual for a
ALEX. If I said to-.thittg to you do you think you would mind it?
boy from Enniscorthy.
GEORGIE. It depends what it is.
GEORGIE. The Army? Good thinking!
A-LEX. I went to Suez.
ALEX. Itt a compliment. If thatt what you're worried about.
GEORGIE. \7hat did you do at Suez? GEORGIE. Thatt exciting.
AIEX. I spent most of my time there listening to Gene Vincent ALEX. You smell just lovely.
GEORGIE. Thankyou.
records. Wi-ti.h was about the most constructive and worthwhile
ALEX. You smell musky.
activity I'd engaged with up to that point.
GEORGIE. Yes.
GEORGIE. GeneVincent.
ALEX. Yes. ALEX. I didnt notice you wearing perfume before.
GEORGIE. Is that the kind of thing you notice, whether or not
GEORGIE. Cool. Do you still listen to music?
people are wearing perfume?
AIEX. Yes I do.
AIEX. I think a lot about the smell of things. It's because I worry
GEORGIE. \7hat kind of music do you listen to?
all the time about getting the smell of meat offmy skin.
ALEX. I listen to all kinds of music.
GEORGIE. You dont smell of meat.
GEORGIE. Everybody says that.
ALEX. I larow. But with me itt true. I started with rock and roll. And
ALEX. I rather do, I'm afraid.
GEORGIE. I love perfume. It's like dressing up.
then I moved onto rhythm and blues. Gospel music. Country and
ALEX. Yes.
\7estern. And mod music. Garage rock. Pqychedelic. Hippy music. Jazz
GEORGIE. Next time I dress up like this will you bring me some
mtsic. Funk. String quartets. Operas. Symphonies. Heavy metal. Disco
flowers?
music I liked. Rather a lot acually. Motown. Electronic music' German
noise music. Punk music. Electro. New Romantic. Rap music. Indie pop.
AIEX. Okay.
GEORGIE. I like it when men bring me flowers. It doesnt happen
The music that came out of Manchester in the end of the eighdes. Acid
very often.
music. Soul mtuic. Deep soul music. Gchno' House' Grime. Dubstep'
Every night I finish work and I walk home. And on the way home I ef'pX. I have a problem with crying. There. That's something else
about me. That's a line. Thrown. I have a problem with crying.
sit on benches. In parks. And I listen to music.
GEORGIE. With crying?
GEORGIE. Youwalk?
ALEX. Is that very strange?
ALEX. Thatt right.
GEORGIE. It depends what kind of problem it is.
GEORGIE. To ClaPham Common?
ALEX. Sometimes I burst out crying for no real reason. I can stop
ALEX. Hm{mm.
exactly as suddenly, but sometimes it just starts like that.
GEORGIE. How long does that take?
GEORGIE. \7hat are you doing wo*ing as a butcher? For goodness
AIEX. It takes an hour and a half,
A man like you, you should be' you should be, you should be
GEORGIE. Every day?
sake.
ALEX. lMhat?
-
AIEX. I like it. I like walking' 'We
live once. You do know that dont you?
GEORGIE.
I compose little poems in my head. I m like a deranged septuagenalian
ALEX. Of course I know that.
Pooh Bear with an unusual love of DJ Zinc.
GEORGIE. Once. You cant go frittering it away. You can't go round
\7hat else am I going to do? Stay inside and eat fucking biscuits?
wasdng it.
GEORGIE. Youre quite habitual arent you?

23
22
ALEX. I'm not wasting it. GEORGIE. Yeah you had.
GEORGIE. You are. You are. ALEX. I dont think I dared.
\7ould you like to sleep with me? GEORGIE. Didnt you think about it? Didnt you look at me and
AIEX. I would like that very much. think, "I wonder what it would be like having sex with her?" I bet
GEORGIE. You know when I say "to sleep" that I dont actually you did. You better have. 'Cause can I tell you I wondered that
mean to sleep dont you? about you from within about two minutes of meeting you.
ALEX. I do know that. I do understand that. Are you blushing? You are. My God. You're so cute. You're seventF-
GEORGIE. Although sleeping together is quite nice. five years old and you're fucking cute. Are you cold?
ALEX. Yes. Yes. Yes. It is. Yes. i AIEX. No.
GEORGIE. Are you hungry?
i ALEX. I'm okay.
GEORGIE. I am. I always get hungry after sex. I could eat a fucking
Scene 4 big breakfast right now I could eat a big fucking steak. An entire
tuna fish. I could eat you. Every bit ofyou.
"Stop talking Georgie. Savour the fucking moment for God's sake."
Alex Priesti bedroom. 4 a.tt. \7as that the first time you've had sex in ages and ages?
ALEX. It has been quite a long time.
GEORGIE. I bet it has. How long? No. You dont need to answer
GEORGIE. Move over. Thank you. that if you dont want to. But I am really, really interested, in case
Are you okay? you were wondering about that.
ALEX. I am yes. ALEX. I think itt probably better thinking in terms of years, say,
GEORGiE. Ha. than months.
Me too. GEORGIE, I thought so. So there was a lot of build-up in there.
'lVbll
Me three. Me four. Me five. Me six. Me a million. ALEX. no. Itt not like I've been storing it up. I'm really quite
I like sex. Don't you? skilled at masturbation. Itt easier than having sex.
ALEX. I do. You know. I really do. I do. I do. GEORGIE. Do you think so?
GEORGIE. I like your bed. ALEX. Less negotiation involved. Less clumsiness.
ALEX. Thankyou. GEORGIE. Less actual contact with another human being.
GEORGIE. It's a good size. rWhy have you got such a big bed? ALEX. There is that, but I dont know whether or not that's overrated
ALEX. I like sleeping diagonally. really. More often than not I just end up being disappointed with
GEORGIE. Do you? other people.
ALEX. Rolling about. GEORGIE. Are you disappointed with me?
GEORGIE. Ha. I Alex?
Are you happy? ALEX. No. Do you know? I'm really. I'm not.
ALEX. Yes. I am. Are you? l GEORGIE. Thatt good. That's a reliefl,
GEORGIE. Dont I look it? AIEX. 'ilZhat are you smiling about?
'Was
that what you wanted it to be? GEORGIE. Itt one of my favourite things.
ALEX. I dont know what you mean. ALEX. lilZhat is?
GEORGIE. \7as it what you envisaged it would be like? GEORGIE. Having sex with somebody whot not had sex for a
AIEX. I'm not sure I'd envisaged anything in particular. long time.

24 )\
ALEX. Really? American roots because there are no North American roots.
GEORGIE. Yeah. Definitely. I like the way they get clumsy. It Have you got your breath back yet?
makes it a lot less like a show-jumping competition. And then they ALEX. I think so.
kind of remember a lot of their old tricks. Can I tell vou? You have GEORGIE. Dont go to sleep.
some very impressive old tricks. ALEX. I won't.
AIEX. A show-jumping competition? GEORGIE. If you do I'll keep prodding you until you wake up.
(Georgie does a sudden, delighted, fairly lengthy scream.) AIEX. Good thinking.
GEORGIE. Sorry. I just wanted to do that. I'm nor really that GEORGIE,. Do you *r.rt pillow fight? No. Better not. I'd beat
sorry. Is that going to get your neighbours really mad? "
you so easily it would just be embarrassing for both of us.
ALEX. It might do. (Some time.)
GEORGIE. Y/hat are they like, your neighbours? ALEX. I like this time of day.
ALEX. I have no idea. They change all the time. I never meet GEORGIE,. Yes.
them. I ve completely lost track of who they are. ALEX. I like the light in London at this time of day.
(Georgie giua dnother dclighted scream.) (Some time.)
GEORGIE. Your house is lovely by the way. GEORGIE. \7hat was she like?
ALEX. Thankyou. Tell me one thing about her.
GEORGIE. It's very tasteful. It's very beautifully painted. Did you Please.
paint it? Sorry. I didnt mean to pry. Have I completely ruined the moment
ALEX. Yes I did. now? I have, haven't I?
GEORGIE. Youve done a really terrific job on it. Did it completely break your heart when she left?
ALEX. Thankyou. ALEX. I dont remember.
GEORGIE. Do you think aboutJoanne Downey all the time? GEORGIE. Yes you do. You big fat liar.
(He looks at her before he ansuers.) AIEX. I dont, you know. I keep a diary. It'Il be in there. I can
AIEX. No. check it for you.
GEORGIE. Do you think about her every day? GEORGIE. How long have you kept a diary for?
ALEX. No. ALEX. For sixry-seven years.
GEORGIE. Every week? GEORGIE. Sixry-seven years?
AIEX. M"yb. every week. ALEX. That's right.
GEORGIE. I like your skin. I like all its folds. It smells of beer and GEORGIE. Holy shit.
tobacco and tea. That's amazing to me. kt like Europe. ALEX. I've written in it every day. Itt rather an odd diary. I ve
ALEX. Europe? written fifry words a day on it, exactly, for sixty-seven years. Fifty
GEORGIE. Yes. 'Cause itt old. I mean it as a huge compliment by words exactly. No more. No less' Every day. Is that a bit eccentric?
the way. GEORGIE. I dont know about "eccentric."
AIEX. Then I'll take it as a huge compliment. ALEX. Bull-headed.
GEORGIE. Europet fucking brilliant. GEORGIE. \7eird, maybe. It might be a bit boring. To read. A
ALEX. All of it? bit limited.
GEORGIE. It's so excitable. Because it's so old, it gets excited by \7hat do you want for breakfast?
new things. America's a fucking hole. It's a fundamentalist hole ALEX. Isnt it a bit early for breakfast?
full of fundamentalist idiots. It's a shitry new country pretending GEORGIE. I'll go and find something. Have you got any porridge?
to be old. There's no point getting in touch with your North ALEX. I dont think so.

26 )7
GEORGIE. Should I go and buy some? I love porridge. That's the secret that nobody knows about music.
(She leaues. He watches her go. He starts crying. He xops crying. He Music doesn't exist in the notes. It exists in the spaces between
?ats some music on.) the notes.
(Sbe comes back. Shei got a bar ofextremely experuiue chocolate with hen) (She rests afnger on his nose.)
This is all I could find. In the whole house. GEORGIE. Your nose.
'S7hen
ALEX. Yes. was the last time you spoke to your sister?
'When
GEORGIE. You've got a really big house. Especially for a man living ALEX. you went out of the room.
on his own. An unnecessarily big house in fact. And I looked in the GEORGIE. Really?
fridge and all the cupboards I could find, and all I could find was this. ALEX. Really.
ALEX. Chocolate! (She loohs at him)
GEORGIE. Iin really disappointed. GEORGIE. She was ten.
ALEX. How can you be disappointed by chocolate? ALEX. Thatt right.
GEORGIE. Right. GEORGIE. And when you talk to her now how old is she?
ALEX. Seriously. I'm tremendously enthusiastic about chocolate. ALEX. Shet older than ten.
This is very, very good as well. ICs got ginger in it. Tiy it. GEORGIE. I should think so.
GEORGIE. Ginger? ALEX. She was rwo years older than me. So she still is. Shet always
ALEX. Itt good isnt it? two years older than me.
GEORGIE. I was hoping for something a bit meatier. GEORGIE. Do you just make up what she looks like? Do you
AI-EX. Hmrn. imagine it all? And her voice and things like that?
GEORGIE. From a butcher! I was hoping for like a black pudding \7hen you imagine her, face does it ever change between imaginings?
at least. Or is it incredibly consistent?
I think you rnight need to take me out and buy me something a bit ALEX. It's consistent.
'S7hat
more substantial. Lil<e a big sandwich or something. Sorne kind of egg- GEORGIE. were you talking to her about?
based breakfast. And we can sit in a cafe eating egg-based breakfast ALEX. I asked her about you.
things and you could read the newspaper to me in your Irish voice. GEORGIE. Right. \X/hat did she say?
You have ayery, very fucking sexy voice. Itt sonorous. ALEX. She didnt say anything.
"I'm tremendously enthusiastic about chocolate." \Thenever itt a decision that probably I need to make for myself
\Mhat's this music? she just disappears. It becomes very hard to focus on her any more.
ALEX. Itt Johann Sebastian Bach. GEORGIE. -What decision do you need to make?
GEORGIE. k it? \,X/hatt the decision that you need to make Alex?
ALEX. The Sonata for Violin and Piano. In B Minor. AIEX. I'm a bit scared.
'What
GEORGIE. Is it? GEORGIE. are you scared oP
ALEX. It is. Yes. ALEX. I have a horrible feeling, I'm afraid that there is a bit of me
GEORGIE. Great. I'm starving. Itt very plinky-plonky. that's ..,
ALEX. You're not listening to it. GEORGIE. Spit it out.
GEORGIE. I am. ALEX. That's falling in love with you and I dont want that to happen.
ALEX. You're not. You can hear it. Thatt not listening to it. Thatt I won't let that happen. In no sense is that allowed to happen. I'm
different from listening. stopping it from happening. Here. Now. Right now. Im going.
You need to follow it. The melody. Thy to predict what will happen GEORGIE. This is your house.
to it next. It will completely take you by surprise. ALEX. Iknow.

28 29
GEORGIE. Theret nowhere for you to go.
ALEX. I know.
GEORGIE. \7here are you going to? Scene 5
ALEX. I have no idea.
GEORGIE. Stupid old fucker.
ALEX. Yes. A rather scrffi commurual park area in Clapton.
(She loohs at him for d aer!, ueryl long time. So long iti lihe a blinhing
contest.)
GEORGIE. \Mhen I was rummaging around your kitchen cupboards GEORGIE. Is this a bit embarrassing for you?
I made a decision. ALEX. In no sense.
ALEX. Oh yes? GEORGIE. I just like it here.
GEORGIE. I decided I was going to come back up here and ask ALEX. I like it too.
you to give me fifteen thousand pounds. GEORGIE. I dont believe you.
I need to go to New Jersey. I need to find Jason. It's all I ever think ALEX. I'm not asking you to believe me.
about. It's an ache in my belly thatt like having a rumour or GEORGIE. You are with your eyes. You're looking terribly earnest.
something. I haven't got any money. You have. I come here to get away from the kids.
I had no idea you were going to start saying stufflike that about you AIEX. I thought you said you liked the kids.
being fi'ightened about falling in love with me. If I'd known that I GEORGIE. I do. But sometimes they overwhelm me a little.
might have thought again. But to not ask now would be like a big lie. ALEX. I can imagine.
N7hat are you doing? GEORGIE. You can't. Youve no idea.
ALEX. I'm getting dressed. It's the way they look at me when they bring me their notes from
(He gets drused. She uatches him.) home. And their questions about money. I just wanr ro give them
\7hen did you know? \7hen did you know, really, you were going a good shake. I just want to warn them.
to ask me? ALEX. 'What about?
\fas it really when you \Mere in my kitchen or have you been planning GEORGIE. Oh. You know Life. They can't see me here.
this for ages? It's not very Clapham Common is it?
'Was
it really when you were in my kitchen or have you been planning ALEX. There are areas like this in Clapham Common.
this for ages? GEORGIE. No there arent. You fucking liar. Theret nowhere else
GEORGIE. It was really when I was in your kitchen. like this anywhere else in the world. I'm sorry. I dont mean to be
ALEX. -Was it? so aggressive. It's because I'm embarrassed. I didn't expect you to
GEORGIE. Yes. come here.
AIEX. \7as it? ALEX. I noticed.
GEORGIE. No. I ve been planning it for ages. GEORGIE. You took me completely by surprise.
ALEX. Since you first saw me? ALEX. I rather enjoyed that.
GEORGIE. Yes. No. Yes. Reallyyes. GEORGIE. You little fucker.
ALEX. Did you decide you were going to do this before you even AIEX. I like your office.
saw me? Did I just fit the bill? GEORGIE. \Xrhy?
GEORGIE. No. I only just decided in the kitchen. Yes. Ive known ALEX. It seemed energetic.
I was going to do this for months and months and months. I'm sorry. GEORGIE. Itt not. It's organised. The energy comes from the kids,
not from the office.

30 31
ALEX. Is this your lunch break? GEORGIE. Have you?
GEORGIE. It is, yes. \7hat have you been doing?
ALEX. Havent you got any lunch? ALEX. Oh. You know.
GEORGIE. I've got a Miiller fuce. GEORGIE. Little bit of butchering.
ALEX. You can eat it if you want ro. AIEX. Thatt right.
GEORGIE. Thank you. GEORGIE. Couple of lengthywalks.
Miiller Rice out of her
(She takes a bag and a teds?oon. She starts eating ALEX. That kind of thing.
Milller Rice.)
the GEORGIE. I missed you.
ALEX. How is it? AIEX. Oh yes?
GEORGIE. Itt delicious. I think they're really underrated. The GEORGIE. I did.
combination of soft fruit and yoghurt and rice is really satisfying. ALEX. Ha.
\Would you like to try some?
GEORGIE. \Mhat?
ALEX. No thank you. AIEX. Nothing.
(He watches her eat.) GEORGIE. No, what?
Youve changed your hair. ALEX. You have the most remarkably persuasive eyes. For the
GEORGIE. I wear it up at work. This is slightest second I almost believed you.
ALEX. lMhat? - GEORGIE. You should believe me. Itt the truth.
GEORGIE. Very strange. ALEX. Yes.
ALEX. \XThY? GEORGIE. I missed your quietness. Everythingt so noisy when
GEORGIE. I didnt expecr to see you. I'm completely thrown by it. youie not around.
I can feel myself having ro reinvenr myself to make sure I'm not Did you call the police?
confirsing you with who I am. I always think that I'm a different ALEX. No.
person when I'm at work. I always think I ve got a different personality. GEORGIE. You could have.
ALEX. You haven't. ALEX. \7hy would i call the police?
GEORGIE. How do you know? I might have. GEORGIE. To tell them youd been the victim of a financial fraud.
ALEX. There's no such thing. ALEX. Had I?
GEORGIE. As what? GEORGIE. No. But nearly. Not really.
AIEX. As personalities. They dont exist. People always get it wrong. ALEX. AII you did was ask me for some money.
Personalities are just the sum of the individual things that people do. GEORGIE. You know that and I know that, but they dont know
And the path that connecrs between them. Theyre never fixed. They that. They might look upon my behaviour from an entirely different
can always change. They mean nothing. perspective.
(She looks at him. She looks au)ay.) (He smiles uery gently at her for quite a long time. He looks away.)
(She puts her empl packet back in ber bag. She lichs her (He chuchles a bit to himself)
Eoon and
puts that back too.) ALEX. I brought it for you. Your money.
(Some time.) Here.
CEORGIE. How has your week been? Itt in fifry-pounds notes. Is that okay?
ALEX. It's been good. It was quite exciting, withdrawing it all from the bank. I liked it
GEORGIE. How have you been? because the person behind the counter had to really try his hardest not
AIEX, I ve been good. I ve been good. I ve been good. I ve been great. to look surprised or excited. Every Friday morning for the past twenry-
two years I ve been to the same bank on Clapharn High Street, taken

32 33
out rr_ry cash for the week. I always prefer going to rhe counter. I always we imagine we're sharing, dont we? I never go back there. Idid
withdraw sixty pounds. Theyve come ro expect it. "Iheyve probably yesterday. I had this
sense, completely, that she was going to walk
given me some kind of 'tixry pounds"-related nickname. Actually, past me on the canal, under the bridge. She didnt.
thinking about it, they probably havent. This morning I rather took GEORGIE. I read about that.
them by surprise. Here. Thke it. Quick. Before some hoodlum comes ALEX.'What?
and nabs it. GEORGIE. In your diaries. You wrote about that day. I read it.
GEORGIE. Dont give me this. ALEX. \)7hat do you mean, you read it?
ALEX. \Thyever not? GEORGIE. \(hat do you think I mean? I read your diaries. You
GEORGIE. Alex you dick. I can't rake this. I dont mean that. I wrote about that day. I read that entry.
do really. AIEX. You-
ALEX. I knew you'd say that. I knew youd try and stop me. You're GEORGIE. Yeah. Sorry. Is it very bad? You went to sleep in the living
much more predictable than you think you are, you know? Do you room. I looked for them. I found them in the drawers under youi
honestly think there's any chance I m going to walk away and not bed. I stayed up all night and read them. I didnt leave your house
leave you the money. You're kidding yourself if you think that. until I had to come to work. Can I tell you, they're not that good?
You're deluded. I like that word. "Deluded." You need to promise ALEX.'What?
me thar you're going ro use rhis money to buy a ticket to go to New GEORGIE. I thought theyd be better. I thought you'd be a better
Jersey. You need to promise me that you're going to try yolr hardest writer. You're not really, are you?
your son. I mean clearly I cant hold you ro your promise,
l" fi14 just You use too many adjectives. It makes it seem like youte trying
but I'd like you_to make it anryay.Is that clear? You need to go too hard.
and see him. Peoplg should do these things. They should. lhiy ALEX. I never gave you permission to read them.
should. They should. GEORGIE. No.
(She takes the money She sits uery, uety still.) ALEX. You never asked me.
(She oTens_ the eruuelope. She loohs inside itfurtiuely, as though to try to
GEORGIE. No.I know.
auoid embarrassment.) ALEX. You had no right.
(She closesit again.) GEORGIE. Theret sixty-seven years worth of diaries in there. I'm
GEORGIE. I dont knowwhat to say. not going to not read them. Only an idiot would do that.
ALEX. Say "Thank you, Alex." It was like reading the entire century. 'What was amazing was the
GEORGIE. Thankyou, Alex. amount of important shit you left out.
ALEX. Yesterday I went somewhere I d not been for years. I went Like Vietnam. That was an omission I think.
to a place I normally avoid. The sun was shining. For a reason rhat ALEX. It didnt seem that important to me at the time. I think
I'm not entirely sure I understand, I decided to walk from the shop people have overestimated how important it was, actually.
to my old house, the house where I lived after the war. I walked GEORGIE. Out of everything in it, some of the pages about her
down the side of the canal. I walked past the place where, years and are good.
years ago, on her birthday, I was with Joanne, when the two of us ALEX. Oh.
get caught in this rainfall. \7e were both of us terribly shy about GEORGIE. But not all of them. Do you ever read them?
kissing one anorher i_n public. But we did shelter under thii bridge ALEX. No.
and we did hold each other very dghtly and watched the rain fall GEORGIE. You never get them out to have a little reminder.
onto the canal. It was in the last week before she told me that she'd ALEX. No.
fallen in love with somebody else. She musr have known that by GEORGIE. To check with yourself to see how you were feeling.
then, of course. 'We hold very different perspectives on experiences ALEX. Fuckoff.

34 35
GEORGIE. You felt sad. In case you were interested.
AIEX. I'm not.
GEORGIE. Yeah you are. Scene 6
Do you really regret giving me this now? 'Cause youre definitely
not having it back.
You were really in love with her. A spot ouerlooking tbe Hachensach Riuer Lincoln Park, Jersey
Do you know what I think, sometimes? Sometimes I look at the City. 11 a.*r.
universe and I think about the scale of it with all of the planets and
the forces and the energies and the elements and the size of the thing
spreading onwards and onwards around into the most astonishing GEORGIE. \7here did you get it?
.ur't., and just think, this world is not in fact a world in which ALEX. I bought it.
people stand up straight on a flat ground. Itt a circling whirl of GEORGIE. \lThere?
gravity and matter in space. The idea of standing up in the face of all ALEX. I went back to sleep after you left. I woke up and I went for
that is bewildering, frankly. a walk and I found a shop selling jackets and it was twenty dollars
You know what you should do, dont you? and I went in and I bought it. I've always wanted to wear a denim
'What
AIEX. who should do? jacket. I've never worn one before.
GEORGIE. You. You fucking idiot. \7ho else am I talking about? GEORGIE. How does it feel?
Elvis fucking Presley? You know what you should do. ALEX. It feels like a bit of misfire. It feels like I've made a bit of a
ALEX. \fhat should I do? mistake. Itt
bit embarrassing.
a
GEORGIE. You should come with me. To NewJersey. \We should GEORGIE. Thke it off, then.
go together. You could be my helper. You could be my Sherpa. You ALEX. In a bit.
could carry my bags. You could read the maps. You could fill the GEORGIE. Itt stopped raining.
water bottles up. You could pack the Miiller Rice. Dont you think ALEX. Yes.
that would be good? I like this spot.
ALEX. No I really dont. The Hackensack.'S7hat a completely brilliant name for a river. I
GEORGIE. It would be. It would be amazingly good. It would be like words that have their own little rhyme in.
good for you and it would be good for me. It would just, on the And I like that bridge. That is a remarkable bridge.
whole, be fucking good. GEORGIE. The Pulaski Skyway.
lbure looking at me with the look of a man whose number has AIEX. (Sauouring the sounds of the words.) The Pulaski Skp,vay.
been called. Youre looking at me with the look of a man who has (He looks at her.)
just been completely fucking rumbled. liflhat did they say?
ALEX. I'm looking at you in the way that I often look at mad people. (She loohs at him. Loohs at him again.)
GEORGIE. This might be the last chance you get. You know? And GEORGIE. Theyd not even heard of him. Theyd not even heard
with a girl like me, we dont make offers like this every day. And his name. I'm not sure they could understand what I was trying to
with the catastrophic track record youve got Alex. You may as well, say. They kept smiling really broadly and saying, "No. No' No." It
mate, is all I'm saying. felt a little contradictory.
How many more Christmases have you got in you? How many ALEX. How long had they been living there?
more times will you have an Easter Egg? How many more times GEORGIE. Ten months.
'W'as
will you hold somebody's hand for the first time? Or kiss somebody ALEX. he definitely the last tenant?
on the lips. GEORGIE. They have no idea.

36 37
AIEX. He left no forwarding address. GEORGIE. Thankyou for coming.
GEORGIE. No. ALEX. k's okay.
AIEX. \7hat did they say at the post office? GEORGIE. Is this the strangesr thing that two people have ever
GEORGIE. lheyd not been told anything.They had no record. done in the history of the world?
AIEX. \7e can ask the neighbours. Find out who the landlord is. \We ALEX. I think it might be amongst the strangest things but, you
should ask in bars.'We could go into shops. There are shops around know, people have done some very strange things.
here he would definitely have gone into. He'd have needed to buy GEORGIE. I find your face very reassuring. It's good to have it
milk and toilet paper and he would have gone for the occasional beer around. How's NewJersey compared to London?
maybe.'Was he religious? AIEX. \7ell. Its very peculiar isnt it?
GEORGIE. No. I dont know I dont think so. Maybe. Fuck. GEORGIE. How?
Thatd be really awful. AIEX. Everything seems so new. Everythingt very clean. I like all
ALEX. Because if he was religious he rnight have been a member the funny shops. Itt very green.
of a church or something like that. Churches always remember GEORGIE. I hate it.
people, I bet. I bet they have fastidious memories of the people AIEX. Yes. I rather thought you would.
who used to go there. GEORGIE. It's a fucking Republican back lawn. It makes me
-Me
could go to the police. Somebody cant just disappear. want to set the place on fire.
GEORGIE. There is a quarter of a million people in this city. AIEX. Dont.
AIEX. Yes. I read that. GEORGIE. I wont.
GEORGIE. How did you sleep? AIEX. If we find him, I have to say I'm rather worried I might give
ALEX. Very deeply. I didnt have any dreams. It felt like Id fallen him abit of a clip round the ear.
asleep before I'd even closed my eyes. \7hat about you? GEORGIE. I think I might just punch him square in the fucking
GEORGIE. I didnt sleep at all. jaw. $7ith a claw hammer. Break his nose.
ALEX. Didnt you? Kiss it better. I feel so much sadness it could fill a well.
GEORGIE. I couldnt. (He looks at her.)
AIEX. \X/hat did you do? (He touches her nose.)
GEORGIE. I read. I walked around the room. I watched you ALEX. \Vhy do you think he left?
sleep.I thought about a lot ofthings. (She loohs at him for a long rime.)
ALEX. You can't not sleep, Georgie. GEORGIE. I dont know.
GEORGIE. You were very still. You were completely silent. You ALEX. No?
didnt snore or fart or scratch or move or roll over or steal the sheets GEORGIE. No. I dont. I dont. I'm sorry. I dont.
or anything. I rn'as convinced you were dead. I did have to have a (Some time,,)
tWe could train. Go over to Manhattan if you'd like to.
very close listen at one point. Just to be sure. get on a
Howt your body clock? ALEX. Gosh.
ALEX. Itt rather roundly disorientated. I have absolutely no idea GEORGIE. Itt an hour away. At most. It gets straight into Penn
what time it is at all. How about yours? Station. \We could go down 34th Street. \flould you like that?
GEORGIE. I pretty much never have any idea what time it is. You AIEX. It sounds thrilling.
were funny on the plane. I ve not seen anybody over ten that excited GEORGIE. \7e could go up the Empire State Building. Thatt the
about travelling in a plane. last good thing left to do in the whole of New York. The entire rest
ALEX. They have free alcohol and free fihrrs and free little socks. ofthe island has been turned into a tasteful shoe shop.
Only an idiot wouldnt be excited about that. Look at you.

3B 39
ALEX. '!f.hat about me? GEORGIE. I'm not that young.
GEORGIE. You look all. ALEX. You are. Compared to me you are. You're practically a
.What?
ALEX. fucking teenager.
GEORGIE. Like you're full ofwonder. GEORGIE. Yeah.
ALEX. That's probably just my retinas. I wouldnt read too much AIEX. Dont laugh.
into it. GEORGIE. No, sorry. I'm just hrppy.
GEORGIE. Your retinas? ALEX. People worry far too much about what they are, you know.
ALEX. There are dead cells floating around the back of my retina. They should be thinking about what they do.
\We could spend some time together for example. \7e could do that.
They're a constant distraction. They make me look as though I'm
being profound when actually I'm just a bit confused. I do rather like having sex with you. I think thatt just terrific and a
GEORGIE. I was thinking last night about what it'll be like when really unexpected boon at my time of life and I d definitely be up
you die. That was one of the things I was thinking about when I for doing some more of that, and I m a big fan of the cuddling and
was walking up and down the room and watching you sleep. I the sleeping and I'm very interested in rubbing your feet while we
made myself cry imagining it. It was really surprising. I m going to watch television or loading your dishwasher without even asking
be so sad. Fuck. I ve known you six weeks. Itt fucking absurd. you if I should or not or allowing you to make me soup and all of
How long should we give it Alex? those things. I m good at gardening. I could do some gardening.
AIEX. What do you mean? Maybe every so often I could pick you up from work without even
GEORGIE. How long should we look for him for? asking and the people you work with wouldnt make a big deal of
ALEX. For as long as you want to. it. It would just be something that's normal. It would just be the
GEORGIE. Yeah. kind of thing that we just do. I'd very much like to perfect the art
'We of knowing exactly when you want a cup of coffee and making one
ALEX. should spend some time trawling the shops.'We should
go into the bars. We should ask in the churches. It is worth asking for you without asking. I'd do that. I have no idea how long I'll be
rhe police. Theret no point coming all this way and not doing that, able to do it for. The older I get, I have to say, the more aware I am
is there? Is there really? There's not. of how very brief everything is. It's terribly brief, life. It seems a
GEORGIE. No. Do you thinkwe'll find him? little unfair. I cant help feeling that I'm only just getting the hang
ALEX. No. of the bugger.
'$Tillyou GEORGIE. Stand up.
GEORGIE. be my boyfriend?
ALEX. tVhat do you mean? ALEX. lVhat?
GEORGIE. I mean properly go out with me and look after me and GEORGIE. Stand up. Come here. Stand up. Give me your hand.
do things like make me soup somctimes or give me a foot rub watching ALEX. Here?
the television and when we have sex sometimes you could stay or just GEORGIE. Yes, here. Now.
hold me or let me lie on you for a bit, would you do that? (The1, dance together. They finish.)
ALEX. No. I don't think so. No. (She kisses hls cbeeh.)
GEORGIE. No? Thank you. That was lovely.
ALEX. No. ALEX. 'Where did you learn that?
GEORGIE. Right. GEORGIE. I had lessons. I went for lessons. I had three. It was
ALEX. Of course not. amazing. They amazed me.
GEORGIE. No. I missed the point about everything didnt I?
ALEX. You're far too young to be my girlfriend. I'm far too old to ALEX. 'What do you mean?
have a girlfriend in the first place.

40 41
GEORGIE. If I asked you to stay another week you'd stay with PROPERTY LIST
me, wouldnt you?
ALEX. Yes, I would Expensive bar of chocolate
GEORGIE. If I asked y9." jo go, you'd go somewhere else with me, trrttiller Rice and spoon
t9-go,back hom.e, you'd do that too, wouldnt you? 'Wouldnt you? Envelope with pounds sterling inside
9q
ALEX. Yes I would do that too.
GEORGIE. That's all I need. To know that. That just suits me
down to the ground. Thankyou. SOUND EFFECTS
End of Play Bacht SonataforViolin and piano in B Minor

42 43
 NESTPLAYS
* MOTHERS AND SONS byTerrence McNaIly. At turns funny and powerful,
MOTHERS AND SONS portrays a woman who pays an unexpected visit to the
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* THE HEIR APPARENT by David Ives, adapted from Ir llgataire Universel

byJean-Frangois Regnard. Paris, 1708. Eraste, a worthy though penniless young
man, is in love with the fair Isabelle, but her forbidding mother, Madame fugante,
will only let the two marry if Eraste can show he will inherit the estate of his rich but
miserly Uncle Geronte. Unfortunately, old Geronte has also fallen for the fair Isabelle,
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rich Uncle Geronte isnt dead at all and is more than ever ready to marry Isabellel
The multiple strands of the plot are unraveled to great comic effect in the streaming
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ever after. t4M, 3\X4 ISBN: 978-0-8222-2808-0

* HANDLEIflTH CARE byJason Odellwilliams. Circumstances both hilarious

and tragic bring together a young Israeli woman, who has little command of English,
and a young American man, who has little command oF romance. Is their inevitable
love an accident. ..or is it destiny, generations in the making? 'A hilarious and heart-
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fearlessly adorable and a tiny bit maglcal." -Naples News. [2M, 2\flJ ISBN: 978-0-
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* LAST GAS byJohn Cariani. Nat Paradis is a Red Sox-loving part-time dad who
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to the west. \Vhen an old flame returns to town, Nat gets a chance to rekindle a
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t4M, 3\X4 ISBN: 978-0-8222-3232-2
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* ACT ONE by James Lapine. Growing up in an impoverished Bronx family * I'LL EAI YOU LAST A CIIAI I(zITH SUE MENGERS byJohn Logan. For
and forced to drop out of school at age thirteel), Moss Hart dreamed of joining more than 20 years, Sue Mengers' clients were the biggest names in show 6usiness:
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* THE VEIL by Conor McPherson. May 1822, rural Ireland. The defrocked
Reverend Berkeley arrives at the crumbling former glory of Mount Prospect * PUNK RocK by simon stephens. I. a private school oumide of Manchester,
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a
to be married offto a marquis in order to resolve the debts of her mothert estate. through the day while preparing for their A-Level mock exams. vith hormores
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* AN OCTOROON by Branden Jacobs-Jenkins. Winner of the 2014 OBIE 8222-3288-9
Award for Best New American Play. Judge Peyton is dead and his plantation
Grrebonne is in financial ruins. Peyton's handsome nephew George arrives as heir * THE COUNTRY HOUSE by Donald Margulies. A brood of famous and
apparent and quickly falls in love with Zoe, a beautiful octoroon. But the evil longing-to-be-famous creative artisrs have garhered at their summer home during
overseer M'Closky has other plans-for both Terrebonne and Zoe. In 1859, a fa- the \flilliamstown Theatre Festival, when the weekend takes an ,n.*p..t.d tu.n]
mous Irishman wrote this play about slavery in America. Now an American tries everyone is forced to improvise, inciting a series of simmering jealousies, romantic
to write his own. 'AN OCTOROON invites us to laugh loudly and easily at how outbursrs, and passionate soul-searching. Both witty anJ compelling, THE
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* MNOV translated and adapted by Curt Columbus. In this flascinating ISBN: 978-0-8 222-327 4-2
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out o[debt and out ofprovincial boredom. \7hen the local doctot Lvov, informs OF.KIBEHO is an exploration of faith, doubt, and the power and consequences of
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ailing wife, Ivanov falls deeper into crisis, heading toward inevitable tragedy. [8M,
"Hall's passionate play renews belief in what theater can do.,,-Timebur [ZM, g\f,
8\ifl ISBN: 97 8 -0-8222-3 1 5 5 -4 I boyl ISBN: 978-0-8222-3301-5
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