Lirio,
I am sorry. My heart grieves for you. I was there, but I did nothing…
I was there the day you were born. I witnessed the day when the butterflies swarmed your
house to welcome you as Nanay Rosa gave birth to you. I felt that Tatay Manuel was the
happiest man in Barrio Jardin that day. With a daughter so lovely and pure white, Tatay Manuel
dashed you out of the church with pride the day you were baptized. I saw everything. Yes, I was
there.
I was with you, when you went to school the first time.
I felt how you were so happy and comfortable when you met Yasmin. I know she was your
friend, your only friend. And how heart-broken you were, yes, in your eyes, I saw, when Yasmin
left you alone. And so you turned to your garden for solace.
You were in your solitude when you met Noli. You were in love. Yes, I saw that. I know you
were so much in love with him, that you cried for three months when he left you. They left you.
Yasmin…and Noli…but I was there, I was the only one left. I felt your brokenness, but I kept
quiet, kept it to myself.
I was the first to be shocked when you married Itik Lugay.
You didn’t show any signs of love for him before the marriage. But, you chose him. Why?
I wanted to tell you of Lugay’s habits, his manners and exploits, but I remained silent. I think I
was wrong.
Nanay Rosa and Tatay Manuel whispered to me your name when they died.
Again, I was the only one there for you. But my silence seems to be the only crack in your wall. I
am sorry for being silent…all these times. Your cries are my tears. You wailed silently that only
my ears can hear. But I kept it to myself.
And now, you were badly beaten, almost half-dead. I am seeing all these…yet I cannot call for
help. I wanted to shout for you, but I couldn’t. I wanted to heal your wounds but I am
forbidden.
You cried for help in a deafening silence. I am seeing all these. I am hearing all these.
But I am forbidden to say all these. Yes, if only I could.
When the butterflies turned you into that sweet lily, I saw it all. The fragrance in the air coming
from your wounds enveloped me that I cried a bucket of tears. You left. And I remained silent…