TEXT GAME TALK
Download my free ebook, Decibel’s Text Game Primer at puafieldguide.com.
Why text?
To get her out. Duh.
How do you get her out?
When a girl agrees to meet up, she’s complied with a big hoop. If you ask her to comply with
such a request without first getting her on board, she won’t.
How do you get a girl on board?
Give her positive emotions. Use these spikes in emotions to gain compliance.
How do I do that?
Mostly by spiking her buying temperature or emotional state.
How do I spike her BT?
Make her laugh
Tease her
Play games with her
Demonstrate the traits of an alpha, sex-worthy, fun guy
Control the frame
Stay positive
Push-pull
Exaggeration
Flirt, use words like “baby” and “sexy”, make innuendos
What else helps?
Build rapport. Do this by mirroring her punctuation, emoticons, slang, humor, etc. See below.
Attraction and comfort also can work, but I usually shy away from that stuff til later in the
relationship. Instead of trying to gain A and C through text, DO IT ON DAY 1.
SO. Here’s what you do. Open her by spiking her BT. Keep her BT up. When you sense she’s
on board, go for the meet up. If she declines, change the subject for a bit, then end on a
positive note. If she agrees to the meet up, work out the logistics.
How do I open?
KEEP IT RELEVANT to your interaction, her life (see her FB profile) or your life.
I usually will send a text the day/night of our meeting. Something brief and flirty. If you can use
call-back humor, do it. If you can go direct, do that. Any random stuff will hook. Here’s a few
examples:
Kinda bored. What’s the haps 2nite?
I’m turning into a text junky! OMG I think I need help :(…
OMG those sexy elbows!! Uh oh this is bad
Are u causing trouble??
Hey poncey…
Basics of Text Game
- Get an iPhone or any device which can store an indefinite number of texts.
- Text as many girls as you can, even ones you don’t want to see again; it’s all practice.
- Field test shit just like you would in the real world. Don’t be afraid to lose sets.
- Take your time to respond, don’t worry about length between your responses. Time in the
realm of text game is usually irrelevant.
- What time should you text? Really doesn’t matter, though texting before 11 AM (noon on
Sunday) to me shows you waited up all night thinking about her and couldn’t wait to send the
text.
- Calibrate to your target’s age, education, style, language, ethnicity, etc…and mirror her text
style to some degree.
- Much of this seems super nit-picky, but it’s not. ALL the punctuation, phrasing, use of words
is CRITICAL. Pay VERY CLOSE attention to not just what but how a girl says something in
her text (that is, the SUBtext), and use that to guide your responses. You know where you
want to lead her; she will help tell you how to get there. YOU MUST BE PRESENT TO
CORRECTLY PERCEIVE AND INTERPRET HER SUBTEXT.
- Learn from girls. Start using the phrases or punctuations in your texts that girls use with you,
like cute comebacks you can use on other chicks.
- Keep up with pop culture. Be cooool at all times.
- Is she putting thought into her responses? Is she a texter?? If she’s giving you brief answers
without any thought, then don’t put too much effort into your responses. It’ll end up lowering
your value.
- Move the interaction forward. Where are you going with the thread? What’s your goal with
that exchange? Know the answer to that before you send a text. Text game can address
rapport, attraction, intent, logistics, etc. I’m never just texting for the sake of it. That’s called
fluff and it’ll put you in the friend zone.
- Chill the fuck out! Many times girls have shit going on, and if you’re the guy who keeps
texting to dead air it reveals your insecurity and need for attention. You do need to often give
girls time to respond.
- Use call-back humor. Sift through your day 1 interaction or textings and think about
something sly you can employ.
- Ask her out in a non-needy way, with the assumption that she is already on board. I call
these implicit invitations…
dB: I had a hard day too. Lets grab a beer. We deserve it
dB: Been running around all day. Feel like having a movie nite 2nite
dB: Gonna be with the bros til 9. I can pick u up afterwards
So you’re communicating that you have shit going on, and while you plan on doing something
it would be great for her to join. Not putting her on the spot or making her feel essential to
your happiness. You’re also not overtly saying “tag along with me” which undermines your
intent. No, you want alone time with her because you like her and want to get to know her; but
if she’s busy, it’s no biggy.
- Show intent early and often. Call her sexy, adorable, cute. Don’t fawn over her, but get it out
on the table quickly.
- Use sexualizing wisely. You can assess her sexual comfort level, but if you sense she’s not
comfortable then back off. You don’t want to trigger ASD, and you don’t want her thinking
you’re a horndog. Girls will go dead air on you if ASD goes up. Sometimes all it takes is a
winky emoticon or ellipse (…) to make your intent known.
- Use emoticons wisely. Don’t overuse smilies and winks, but if you use them strategically,
you can really add another layer of meaning and help calibrate the verbiage (esp harsh or
sarcastic words).
- Likewise, use punctuation wisely.
dB: Hey girl!! Are u up?!?!? We’re going hiking!! Where u at??? Wake up!!!!
Too much of that shit is like TYPING EVERYTHING IN ALL CAPS. Eventually the reader gets
irritated or numb and the punctuation loses its impact.
The ellipse (…) can be used to tie together two sentences, thereby creating and then
resolving tension. You can put it at the end of a sentence to create tension that she will need
to resolve. You can soften something you may think is too harsh as well. Example:
dB: Lets hang out
dB: Lets hang out…
dB: Lets hang out…free tonight?
- Often times, less is more. Sometimes a simple “Yup” or “Riiiiight” or “Ooookay…” can do
oodles to maintain control of the frame and still be humorous.
- She’s a girl. Remain illogical and fun, just like when you talk to a young girl in person.
Anytime you are tempted to run a logical thread, take a step back and ask yourself if there is
a way to get to a better place by not going down the logical route. There usually is.
- Don’t be too intellectual or brainy. Don’t put that much “thought” into your responses (well
do, but don’t let her feel like you did). Keep em light and loose.
- Get a sense of each girl's baseline. You have to know what her norm is regarding response
time, accuracy of punctuation, length of responses, emotional content, emoticon use and
value invested, so that when she deviates from the norm you can detect a shift in her state.
- BE PRESENT WITH HER EMOTIONAL STATE. Calibrating to her emotional needs is
absolutely critical.
What does it mean to be present?
Be in touch with her emotional state. Respond to that in a way that guides the interaction
towards your goal. It’s like texting while you drive.
What cues can I use to be present?
How long she takes to respond to you
How brief or long her responses are
Punctuation
Use of (or lack of) humor, sarcasm
Game playing
Emoticons
Exaggeration
Capitalization
Grammar and misspellings
Abbreviations
Nick names
Is she present with YOU?
Is she giving you value?
Dangling Threads.
A thread is a line of conversation. You can ask a question or make a comment that provokes a
response.
Rule one: Only dangle one thread at a time.
dB: What's up? Working hard? Let's chill 2nite
You just dangled two threads and she could grab onto the wrong one. As a caveat I do
sometimes run 2 threads, but send out 2 separate texts at once.
Rule two: Some threads don't look like threads.
dB: Hey knucklehead pick u up at 9?
HB: Wtf??? Knucklehead?!
By calling her a knucklehead, I've just dangled a tease thread. Instead of answering my invite,
she goes off onto the second thread and takes offense (even if jokingly) to my tease. This
means at some point I need to re-state the invite, which I never like doing.
Rule three: Always dangle a thread.
dB: I had steak last night
Who the fuck cares?
Rule four: Dangle threads that have the purpose of meeting your goal.
She may not take the bait, but envision a text exchange before you send something.
Goals
When you run a text exchange, you can meet a few different goals:
1. **** GET THE MEET-UP ****
2. Seduce
3. Spike BT (buying temperature)
4. Attraction
5. Comfort/rapport
Playing Games
In texting, you can create games for her. If she chooses to play along, she gets rewarded with
a big BT spike. I illustrate game-playing in several of the case studies in my book. Examples:
role playing, call-back humor.
dB: Proly b more like 645
HB: Y
dB: Z
HB: W
HB: …hatever
dB: W
dB: …iseass
D: OMG those sexy elbows!! Uh oh this is bad
H: Haha I know they are hard to resist
D: Argh I knooooow ;) hey I’m hanging out with the boyz tmrw til 9ish. Let’s go barhopping
after!
H: Yea we will see what’s up. I will oil up my bows for you
D: Perfect I like my bows slippery ;)
D: Whew what a night! Vegas will never be the same
H: what the F did u do to vegas?
D: Uuuuuuuggghhhh
H: That tells me nothing.
D: I’m sure you’ll hear it from Vegas.
H: Nope. Me n vegas had a bad break up. We don’t talk.
Name-Calling
Texting is a great way to show attitude. You can convey a lot by calling her names. Using
words like “brat”, “weirdo”, “missy” and “lameo” get them riled up without being offensive
(most of the time). If they’re being cool, then reward with loving terms like “cutie”, “shorty” or
some call-back name from day 1. A common term of endearment is “baby” and “babe.” These
can come across as sleazy or condescending so use appropriately.
Abbreviations
There are a few abbreviations you need to know about. Some are listed in the ebook.
Dead Air
Dead air is the text equivalent of the back-turn a girl gives you in a nightclub, basically telling
you to go away. Dead air sucks. There are some things you can do about it, which I call
“unclogger texts.” If a few days pass without a response, try out one of these verbatim.
dB: OMG wtf lolz did u get kidnapped into white slavery or sumpthin?? Holla back gurl!
dB: Wassup not feeling cute today?
dB: Ur not your usual texty little self today
dB: What did you do with the old Clarisse? She was waaay more fun
Sometimes you will need to employ dead air to punish a girl for misbehavior. If a girl insults
you or IODs in some way, cut off communication for a while. It’ll hit her when she isn’t getting
the emotional rewards you were just providing. Do NOT dead air a girl who is responsive. You
will just train her not to invest in the text exchange. If a girl is responding like you want, keep
going until you meet your goal.
Mirroring
One of the best ways to create rapport is the old NLP method of mirroring. Instead of
reflecting a girl's body language or words, you can use her style of punctuation, abbreviations,
grammar and smilies. You never want to mimicking exactly what she's doing, but use this
technique periodically, and always look for ways in which she may be trying to mirror you.
Facebooking
Facebook is essential. Have a good site. Full of great pics of chicks, friends, things you do.
Put thought into your bio. Songs, movies, books you like showing that you’re eclectic. State
you’re single.
Why Facebook?
She can do a background check on you. Make sure you’re cool, have friends, girls, etc.
You can do a background check on her. Make sure she’s single, check her status updates.
Girls will post anything and everything, giving you a back door snapshot into their lives. USE
THIS TO YOUR ADVANTAGE.
Usually low-investment on her part (girls like orbiters). You can work her to give you her #,
then move to text game.
You can post clever things on her wall, respond to her status updates (even if just with a
“Like” response).
Some girls are unresponsive to texting though it seemed ON, and you see on her page she’s
dating someone or even married. Or she changes from dating to single. Or she complains
about the men she’s dating. Some girls write married as a joke (they marry another girl); if
there isn’t the same dude in a bunch of pics, she’s probably just kidding.
How to get the Facebook exchange?
When it’s going well, IN THE VENUE, have her add you.
“So, are you a Facebooker? Okay, where’s your phone? Add me.” She searches for your
name, adds you, then you ok her request.
You can do it the other way where you add her, but it’s not as good since this leaves you at
her mercy of approving you.
Alternately, you take her name and add her later. Problem is there may be 1000 girls with her
name, and again she may not approve you. Or you can give her your name/email to add later,
but this almost never works. So…
DO IT IN THE VENUE.
Later, after chatting a bit more, say “hey, text me…but make it funny. No lame texts.” She’ll
take your number and send you a text, then you can respond with something funny or simply
“Got it! ;)”
So what you’ve done here is created a compliance ladder, going from the easier FB add to
the number exchange which involves a little more compliance. Always drop these in mid-
interaction, and keep on gaming afterwards.
How to use Facebook?
In addition to the above, there are two ways:
1. Wait for her name to pop up on the chat column in the lower right corner. When she does,
hit her up. This will usually be a quicky. Get in, ask for her number or a date, then logoff. Don’t
spend all day IMing her or opening her every time she shows up, since she’ll think you’re
stalking her.
Girls will leave FB on and walk away from their computer, so as with texting, CHILLLLLL.
2. Send her a message. Make it short and sweet. You can add your number if you didn’t do
the exchange in person. Should be phrased like “hey, here’s my number: xxxx. Shoot me a
text!” Having her send you a text via this route isn’t as reliable as catching her when she’s in
the chat column in real time.