2005 B
2005 B
Introduction ................................................................................................................ 7 Why Most Guys are DEAD WRONG In The Dating Game ........................................ 7 Learning These Smart Dating Tactics Does NOT Make You Manipulative Person.................................................................................................................... 8 Dont Let Your Old Beliefs Limit Your Success..................................................... 11 Chapter 1 ................................................................................................................. 14 The Smart System of Dating .................................................................................... 14 Non Love .......................................................................................................... 14 The Different Kinds Of Love Explained ................................................................ 15 The Smart Dating System Used In This Course................................................... 16 The Three Components Illustrated ....................................................................... 16 The Triangular Components Broken Down .......................................................... 17 Passion ................................................................................................................ 17 Passion Is The Most Important............................................................................. 20 Our Definition Of Attraction .................................................................................. 21 Ex-Force............................................................................................................... 22 My Love Balance Scale ..................................................................................... 22 For Love .............................................................................................................. 22 Attraction Cuts Through Everything...................................................................... 25 Case Studies ........................................................................................................ 26 Chapter Summary ................................................................................................ 27 Chapter 2 ................................................................................................................. 29 Basic Smart Dating Rules ........................................................................................ 29 Smart Dating Rule #1: Its Not How Much You Like Her, But How Much She Likes You That Counts! ................................................................................................. 32 Smart Dating Rule #2: You Need Permission To Advance .................................. 33 Smart Dating Rule #3: Stay Objective .................................................................. 39 Smart Dating Rule #4: Attraction Cuts Through Everything ................................. 41 Smart Dating Rule #5: Attract, Not Chase............................................................ 43 Smart Dating Rule #6: Be A Challenge To Create Passion.................................. 44 Summary of the Smart Dating Rules .................................................................... 45 Quick Self-Test: Are You Following The Smart Dating Rules?............................. 46 Chapter 3 ............................................................................................................... 49 Chapter 3: Attraction Secrets Exposed .................................................................... 49 Myth #1: Women Only Like Jerks ...................................................................... 49 Quick Self-Test: Are You Following The Smart Dating Rules?............................. 50 Myth #2: Opposites Attract................................................................................. 51 Myth #3: Women Arent Sexual By Nature......................................................... 51 Social-Biological Conditioning .............................................................................. 52
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Ego, Superego, and Id ......................................................................................... 54 The Smart Dating Systems Attraction Model ....................................................... 55 Emotions, Desire, and Action The Three-Step Approach Of The Smart Dating System ................................................................................................................. 57 Section Summary................................................................................................... 58 A Quick Summary Of The Smart Dating System ..................................................... 58 Chapter 4 ............................................................................................................... 61 How Women Check You Out................................................................................ 61 Improve Your Looks Overnight............................................................................. 63 Other Things To Watch Out For............................................................................... 65 Hit The Gym ......................................................................................................... 65 Getting A Tan ....................................................................................................... 66 Chapter 5 ............................................................................................................... 67 Bad Attitude #1: The Im Afraid Of Rejection Attitude ........................................ 68 Creative Persistence ............................................................................................ 69 How To Avoid Rejection ....................................................................................... 70 Bad Attitude #2: The But Shes The Only Girl Ill Ever Love Attitude ................. 73 Quick Self-Test: Are You In Love? ....................................................................... 73 Nobody Cares About Your Love Life .................................................................... 74 Bad Attitude #3: The I Dont Need Women Attitude ........................................... 75 Bad Attitude #4: The Shes Too Beautiful Attitude ............................................. 78 Good Attitude #1: The Playful Attitude ................................................................. 79 Good Attitude #2: The I dont Care Attitude ....................................................... 81 Good Attitude #3: The How Far Can I Go? Attitude ........................................... 83 Good Attitude #4: The Truth And Dare Attitude ................................................. 85 Chapter 6 ............................................................................................................... 86 Insecurity and Neediness ..................................................................................... 86 How To Be More Masculine ................................................................................. 91 Become a leader: ................................................................................................. 92 Pump Iron............................................................................................................. 92 Hold Eye Contact ................................................................................................. 92 Never Settle For The Second Best....................................................................... 93 Lead, Not Push Or Ask......................................................................................... 93 Learn To Say No................................................................................................ 93 Dont Take Any Bullshit ........................................................................................ 93 Be More Adventurous........................................................................................... 93 Walk Tall .............................................................................................................. 94 Be Ambitious ........................................................................................................ 94 Have Charm: ........................................................................................................ 94
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Be Sexual: ............................................................................................................ 94 Other Attractive Traits: ......................................................................................... 94 Chapter 7 ............................................................................................................... 96 Body Language Basics......................................................................................... 97 Postures ............................................................................................................... 97 Good Sitting Postures .......................................................................................... 98 Movements........................................................................................................... 99 Voice Tone ......................................................................................................... 102 Chapter 8 ............................................................................................................. 110 What Kind Of Women You Should Date............................................................. 110 Where To Meet Women ..................................................................................... 111 Expand Your Social Circle.................................................................................. 113 Before You Approach ......................................................................................... 114 Direction Of Approach ........................................................................................ 116 Grab Her Attention With The Eye-Contact Test.................................................. 116 What If Nobody Notices You .............................................................................. 118 Your Opening Line ............................................................................................. 120 How To Start A Conversation ............................................................................. 121 The Four-Steps To Approaching A Woman ....................................................... 123 Step 1: Eye Contact and Smiling........................................................................ 123 Step 2: Use An Opening Line ............................................................................. 123 The Situation-Opener ......................................................................................... 123 The Compliment-Opener .................................................................................... 124 The Question-Opener......................................................................................... 124 A Quick Side Note .............................................................................................. 125 Step 3: Ask A More Specific Question................................................................ 125 Step 4: Introduce Yourself .................................................................................. 126 Chapter Summary .............................................................................................. 126 Chapter 9 ............................................................................................................. 128 The Point Of Conversation ................................................................................. 128 What To Talk About............................................................................................ 129 Topics To Avoid.................................................................................................. 130 How To Keep A Conversation ............................................................................ 131 TECHNIQUE #1: Ask Open-Ended Questions ................................................... 132 TECHNIQUE #2: Active Listening ...................................................................... 133 TECHNIQUE #3: Being Empathetic ................................................................... 134 How To Develop A Conversation Through Subject Words................................. 134 How To Establish A Verbal Connection Quickly ................................................. 135 General Conversation Techniques: .................................................................... 136
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Always Put The Spotlight On The Girl ................................................................ 137 Do Not Brag........................................................................................................ 137 From Emotions To Desire .................................................................................. 138 Using Her Desires To Your Advantage .............................................................. 140 Adding You To the Picture ................................................................................. 142 And Right When Shes Starting To Desire You............................................... 143 Chapter 10 ........................................................................................................... 144 How To Stimulate Love With Your Eyes............................................................. 145 How To Get Sexier Eyes .................................................................................... 146 Mirroring ............................................................................................................. 147 How To Induce Mirroring .................................................................................... 148 The Actual Mirroring ........................................................................................... 149 Touching ............................................................................................................ 150 Ways To Touch Her ........................................................................................... 150 Touching Technique #1: The Handshake........................................................... 150 Touching Technique #2: Touch Her Arms When Shes Funny........................... 150 Touching Technique #3: Read Her Palm ........................................................... 150 Touching Technique #4: Massage Her............................................................... 151 Prepare To Be Touched ..................................................................................... 151 Chapter 11 ........................................................................................................... 152 What to Compliment On: .................................................................................... 152 Your compliment should reflect the ideal self-image of the girl. Before you compliment her, think about what she would want you to compliment her for. What would she most like you to recognize her for? Her intelligence? Her sense of honesty? Or her humor? .................................................................................... 153 Details, Details, Details! ..................................................................................... 155 When and How Often ......................................................................................... 155 Mean What You Say: ......................................................................................... 157 Complimenting a Stranger: Hit And Run ............................................................ 157 How to Receive Compliments: ........................................................................... 158 Chapter 12 ........................................................................................................... 160 The Dangers Of Just Connecting With A Woman Emotionally ........................... 160 If You Lack This, Youre Doomed ................................................................... 160 Flirt For SkirtRight From The Beginning ......................................................... 161 What Flirting Means ........................................................................................... 161 Your Playful Attitude........................................................................................... 162 Test The Waters By Flirting ................................................................................ 163 Basic Flirting Techniques ................................................................................... 164 How To Tease Women .......................................................................................... 166
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How Little Boys Tease Little Girls....................................................................... 167 Busting Her Balls................................................................................................ 168 How To Be Funny: A Quick Lesson.................................................................... 169 Tip #1: Dont Laugh At Your Own Jokes ............................................................ 169 Tip #2: Dont Be Afraid To Be A Man ............................................................... 170 Send Mixed Feelings.......................................................................................... 171 Teasing Examples:............................................................................................. 174 Chapter 13 ........................................................................................................... 179 Advanced Flirting Tactics....................................................................................... 179 Technique #1 - Romantic Intents Signaling........................................................ 179 Practice Phrases ................................................................................................ 179 Practice Verbs .................................................................................................... 180 Technique #2 Act Like Shes Hitting On You................................................... 182 Technique #3 Steal Her Frame ....................................................................... 182 Technique #4 The Whisper Compliment ......................................................... 183 Chapter 14 ........................................................................................................... 184 From Desire To Physical Action............................................................................. 184 Chapter 15 ........................................................................................................... 186 Golden Rules On Getting Digits ......................................................................... 187 Chapter 16 ........................................................................................................... 191 Your First 10 Dates ................................................................................................ 191 Where To Go For The First Date........................................................................ 191 How To Set Up The Date ................................................................................... 193 What to Wear On A First Date............................................................................ 194 The First Date..................................................................................................... 194 Dinner................................................................................................................. 196 The Second Date ............................................................................................... 199 A Few General Rules ......................................................................................... 200 Chapter 17 ........................................................................................................... 202 How Women Tests You And What You Can Do About It....................................... 202 Why Women Test Men....................................................................................... 202 Category 1: Asking You Questions..................................................................... 202 Category 2: Breaking Agreements ..................................................................... 204 Category 3: Challenging Or Disrespecting You .................................................. 205 Category 4: Trying To Change You / Dominate You .......................................... 205 Category 5: Sex Withdrawal ............................................................................... 206 Punisher Technique The Silent Treatment ...................................................... 206 How To Test Women.......................................................................................... 208 Intimacy.............................................................................................................. 209
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Commitment ....................................................................................................... 209 Chapter 18 ........................................................................................................... 210 From Desire To Action: Getting Physical With Women.......................................... 210 If Youre Interested In A Long-Term Relationship............................................... 210 If You Just Want A One-Night Stand .............................................................. 212 Holding Hands.................................................................................................... 212 First Kiss ............................................................................................................ 214 Going Indoors..................................................................................................... 214 How To Satisfy A Woman Physically.................................................................. 216 How To Kiss ....................................................................................................... 216 Cuddling ............................................................................................................. 218 Touching ............................................................................................................ 219 Smelling and Licking .......................................................................................... 220 Talking Dirty ....................................................................................................... 220 Erogenous Zones - Where To Kiss, Touch, Smell or Lick .................................. 222 The Keys To Arousing Her Anticipation and Denial......................................... 223 Chapter 19 ........................................................................................................... 225 How To Keep A Beautiful Girlfriend ....................................................................... 225 Stage 1 The Courtship (First Date To Will You Be My Girlfriend?) ............... 225 Stage 2 The Honeymoon Period (First 1-3 Months Of Being Together).......... 227 Stage 3 The Getting To Know Each Other TOO well Period (3-12 months).... 227 Stage 4 The Were Married Period (1 Year And On)..................................... 228 The Key To Keeping A Relationship Healthy Keep Her Attracted To you ....... 228 How A Woman Breaks Up With A Man .............................................................. 230 Breakups Do NOT Happen Overnight ................................................................ 230 Warning Flags .................................................................................................... 230 How To Play The Love Cop ............................................................................... 231 Surviving A Breakup........................................................................................... 232 Decide Whether You Want Her Back Or Not...................................................... 233 Should You Want Her Back ............................................................................ 233 Move On............................................................................................................. 234 Chapter 20 ........................................................................................................... 236 Closing................................................................................................................... 236 Appendix A How To Turn A Friend Into A Girlfriend............................................ 237 Appendix B What Women Really Mean .............................................................. 239 Appendix C Tongue Twisters .............................................................................. 242
Introduction
From the desk of: Marius Panzarella, Lead Staff Writer
and makes up some lame excuse for a refund. I usually give these suckers a refund right away because I dont want anything more to do with them. (Theyre going to die lonely because their women are going to find out they are cheapskates sooner or later!) The Mr. I Know It All!: The third type of loser is the guy who reads my materials once, feels enlightened, and then throws everything out the window. This is the type of guy who bumps into the same wall and makes the same mistakes over and over again. Not very smart. The I Can Stop Now Guy: The last type of loser is the guy who takes the time to study the materials and practices the techniques until he scores a hot babe. But as time goes on, he gets cocky and begins to let his guard down. Well, guess what? Hes going to find himself single again not before long! Listen, success with women is like success in any other area of life. You must put effort into making it happen and that means work. This course can give you the potential to become successful with women, but it is ultimately up to you to integrate the knowledge into your life and master the information into your experience. No pain, no gain. Get it?
Learning These Smart Dating Tactics Does NOT Make You Manipulative Person
Even though I trust you do not belong to the four categories of men listed above, I am sure you must have a few doubts on the tactics taught in this course. According to a survey I conducted not so long ago, the most common objection to learning and applying my dating tactics is, Isnt this stuff manipulative?
No. Its no more manipulative than the things youre already doing right now!
Think about what the Average Joe does when he bumps into a girl he likes: 1) He tries to win her heart by sending her flowers and buying her gifts. 2) He tries to impress her by boasting about his own success and achievements. Do you think Mr. Average Joe is a manipulative person? After all, he is using bribery and flattery. He is pushing a girl into sleeping with him by buying her expensive dinners. So is Average Joe really being himself when he tries to bribe women with flattery and gifts? By the way, what does being yourself mean? We always hear from women that we should just be ourselves when were around them, but what does being yourself mean? For Mr. Average Joe, it means stuttering and sweating his palms and tensing his body because hes nervous. Not very attractive, is it? Sowould you like to be yourself around women? Or would you rather be a confidant, masculine man that wins all the womens hearts? Heres the thing: you could be yourself and still attract womenif you could just follow some simple rules and tactics of dating.
These rules and tactics by no means make you a manipulative person. Youre not going to be any more manipulative than the loser guy trying to talk his way into a girls pants. Youre not going to be any more manipulative than the Average Joe sending Miss Right flowers and cards. Heck. Youre not going to be any more manipulative than the computer geek putting on a nice shirt and brushing his teeth before he goes out. Here's the bottom line: there are many different ways of doing things. Some work better; some don't work as well. What I teach is another system of attracting women one that works better. Just because this system is different than what youre used to doing doesnt mean it is evil or manipulative. Granted, youre going to learn dating tactics that might be a bit different than the things youve done in the past. But just because these tactics are different does not mean they are manipulative. Heres your first assignment: I want you to walk down the magazine aisle of any grocery store. Check out all the headlines on the magazines. Note how all of the womens favorite magazines such as Cosmopolitan and Glamour always have headlines such as How To Attract Men And Keep Them or 25 Ways To Get Him To Propose To You. Does that mean women are manipulative? No. It just means they are smart. Women actually see the power of learning, and thats why they usually have a HUGE advantage in the dating game. Unlike guys, they are PREPARED for battle. They even get together and girl-talks about how to handle their men. This is exactly why most guys get slaughtered by women in the dating game: Women know what they are doing, men dont.
But dont worry. Im here to help you. By the time youre done with this course, youre going to know all the tactics youll ever need to know to have great success with women.
The best way to learn these new tactics would be to read the whole book from beginning to end. Try to digest and integrate the information into your own experience. Remember to practice often; and if something isnt working out for you, then go back to the book and re-read the related topics again. Dont just read the book once and forget about it. As a matter of fact, dont stop reading my book until you feel you are absolutely positively using the techniques! Print it out, keep it on your bookshelf and come back to it often. Heres my guarantee to you: If you spend the next 3 months working hard, everything will come to you naturally. You wont even have to think twice before you strike up a conversation with a beautiful woman. Whenever you hit a wall or feel discourageddrop me an email and ask for some advice. Ill do my best to work everything out with you. Remember: your problems wont go away unless you tackle them. In time, you will be very successful in the dating game! Remember to email me with your ideas, comments, and suggestions at mariuspanzarella@datebeautifulwomen.com. I am always in the process of updating my works, and I want to know what you think! Sincerely,
Intimacy
Passion
Should any of the three components go missing, true love wont occur. Together, these three components form eight different kinds of relationships. Intimacy Non Love Liking Infatuated Love Empty Love Romantic Love Companionate Love YES YES YES YES YES YES YES Passion Commitment
YES
YES YES
YES YES
Intimacy
Passion
Intimacy
Commitment
Passion
Intimacy
Passion
Passion
Were going to focus on passion throughout the course because it is the most important of the three. Passion basically means sexual attraction, and without sexual attraction, there can be no relationship.
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Passion is what you feel when youre with someone youre really attracted to. I like to call it the discomfort zone of a booming relationship. This discomfort zone is based on two things: Desire and doubt. As humans, we tend to want what we cant have. We also tend to take things for granted. From this, we can derive our first principle of attraction: Behavior Rule #1: People Want What They Cant Have Have you noticed how the less available someone is, the more well want them? And the more needy someone is, the less well like them? Thats why its ALWAYS important to remain a challenge when it comes to the dating game. If were too easy, were going to die lonely. Sowe know that being a challenge can cause doubt, which is an important part of the equation for building passion. But what about the other variable, desire? Desire comes from our subconscious mind. For example, we hope we will get a good job because we WANT a good job. Desire is therefore based on our emotions. Its like buying a new Porsche. When we buy a new Porsche, are we buying a new Porsche because of its powerful engine or nice gear? Ha. Thats what you tell your parents. But deep inside, you know you bought it because you wanted to buy it and youre now only justifying your feelings by coming up with logical reasons to backup your decision.
Behavior Rule #2: People Make Conscious Decisions Based on Subconscious Feelings A good thing to remember is that love is based on feelings, not logic. We dont choose to love at a conscious level. We only feel were falling in love. In short, in doesnt matter how logical it may seem that a woman should be in love with you. If a girl does not feel attracted to you, than no amount of convincing her that youre the right one will do. This is also why you cant really ask girls to explain why they are in love with a certain man. The things they saylike hes funny or hes a nice guy are only EXCUSES theyve come up with to explain the decisions theyve made based on their feelings. This is exactly why if you would like to be good with the ladies, you should attack their FEELINGS instead of their logic. We will learn to do this with the tease to please and flirt for skirt methods later in the course.
Intimacy:
Intimacy is the reciprocal bonds between two people. Think of it as the friendship between a couple. Intimacy relies on: 1) Giving How much your lover is prepared to give to you. 2) Self-Disclosure How much your lover is willing to open up for you. 3) Flexibility How flexible your lover is going to be around you.
Commitment:
Commitment is the degree of a persons willingness to commit to a relationship. It relies on:
1) Respect How much respect your lover has for you. 2) Integrity How honest your lover is. 3) Loyalty How loyal your lover is.
Were naturally drawn to people that exhibit a high level of independence, such as leaders. At the same time, we tend to pull away from people that are very needy. The more needy a person is, the less respect we have for them. This goes with Behavior Principle #2: We want what we cant have. The less someone needs us, the more respect we have for them. And the more someone is available to us because they depend on us, the less respect we have for them. Since respect is the only variable under commitment and intimacy that we can control and since it really falls under passion, were going to focus on just passion throughout the course. We will learn how to use the C Factor (The Challenge Factor) and the D Factor (The Desire Factor) to attract women by increasing their passion for us.
Ex-Force
The Ex-Force is a term weve come up with to represent the negative external forces that are influencing your relationship. Basically, it represents the forces of the obstacles that have a negative impact on your relationship. Here are a few examples: 1) Your age gap 2) A competitor (like another guy) 3) Your height 4) Your bad looks 5) Your skin color 6) Your lovers childhood traumas (Rape, abuse, etc) 7) Distance 8) Fear of commitment 9) Religion 10) Family
Examples:
Example 1: Your girl stops dating you because the attraction is not great enough for her to work out the age gap.
Example 2: Your girl stays and ignores the age gap because shes too attracted to you to do anything else.
Example 3: Your girl leaves because the other guy is much hotter than you, even though youre the nicer guy.
Example 4: Your girl stays with you because youre more attractive than the other guy even though he has a better job and more money than you.
convince that they are much better. They try to beg, whine, cajole, and plead. When they should have been attracting the girl all along. Understand this concept will already put you ahead of most guys. Remember, guys: attraction IS everything.
Case Studies
Weve just gone through an awful lot of information that will probably take a few weeks for you to digest. (Its easy to READ this information, but much harder to apply these concepts to EVERY aspect of your love life.) Our Smart Dating Method is a VERY powerful system that can solve whatever dating problems youre having. Unlike most approaches that cover only one-night stands or long-term relationships, this system covers everything that is related to your love life. To show you some of the things it can do, were going to study a few sample cases. (Note: The names of the individuals have been changed to protect their identities.) Case Study #1: John, Age 20 John was dumped by his girlfriend. But instead of getting upset, he followed the C Factor and acted happy about the breakup. His girlfriend broke down and tried to win him back over the next few weeks. Case Study #2: Mark, Age 23 Mark had had a secret crush on his best friend since he was 16. After reading my materials, he realized that he was missing the one thing that made a relationship a romantic relationship instead of a friendship: passion. He
followed my flirting advice and got his best friend to ask him out. Case Study #3: Tim, Age 51 Tim fell in love with a young woman (30) and was worried of the age gap. Then he looked at the love balance scale model and emailed back, A-ha! Case Study #4: Bruce, Age 36 Bruce was feeling miserable because his wife was drifting away. After using the love triangle to diagnose his relationship, he realized that his relationship was lacking respect and passion. He used the C Factor to pull back and his ignited passion in his relationship again.
Chapter Summary
So farweve learned the three basic components of love: intimacy, commitment, and passion. Intimacy consists of flexibility and self-disclosure, and giving. Commitment consists of respect, integrity and loyalty. Passion consists of desire and uncertainty. Together, they combine into attraction, or the magnetic force that pulls two people together. But since we cannot always control intimacy and commitment, we can cancel them out, which leave: Passion = attraction.
This attraction cuts through everything and overcomes any Ex-force (resistance) such as family and religion. Rules To Remember: Behavior Rule #1: People Want What They Cant Have Behavior Rule #2: People Make Conscious Decisions Based on Subconscious Feelings Based on these two rules, we can see the importance of: Attracting women instead of using logic to convince them. (The D Factor) Giving them enough challenge to keep their interests for us. (The C Factor) Nowlets talk more about attraction and debunk a few conventional rules of dating
>THERE WAS THIS GIRL I MET SOMETIMES BACK. SHE IS >THE MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY >LIFE BUT I HAVE NEVER TOLD HER THIS CUZ I DONT >KNOW HOW SHE IS GOING TO FEEL. HONESTLY I DONT >KNOW HOW TO TELL THIS GIRL I LOVE HER. I AM AFRAID >OF TELLING HER I LOVE HER PLZ KINDLY HELP ME OUT >CUZ IF I DONT GET TO HAVE THIS GIRL I MAY DIE > THANKS!
Subject: Something About Love
>Hey man. There is a problem. The girl I love is unfortunately someone >elses girlfriend. I try to forget about her but cant. Every time I see her I >just cant resist her. Is there any way of making her come to me and >dumping her boyfriend? >Hoping to hear from you!
>Hi there Marius you may have forgotten about me but I have not. >About a week ago I was dating this girl, well we were kinda dating we >talked on the phone everyday and we were exchanging e-mails (but we >never went out because she is busy on my days off and I am busy on her >days off.).I know she loves me because she said it. Ok about 4 days ago I >went to visit her we talked and then when I was leaving she told me to >call her because she had something to tell me, So I called her later and >she told me that she needed some time off because she just broke up >with her old boyfriend (they were dating for 3 years), and that we were >going too fast. She asked me to give her some time to think about our >relationship. But here is the catch she told me 2 times she was going to >call me but she never did. First time I called her then she said she would >call me, but she didnt. Second time the same. Is she playing with me or is >she serious? My question is: what can I do to make her love me more or >call me? I really love her and she broke my heart went to said that she >should stop seeing each other
Subject: Help!
>I have recently broke up with my girlfriend. She said that she had too >much on and that it was not fair on me. All that I want to do is get back >together with her. How do I go about doing so?
Do you see a trend among these mails? About 90 percent of these emails contain questions such as: Why isnt she answering my calls? I love her so much but shes ignoring me. Why? Why did she cancel the date? Why did she say I am too good for her? Why doesnt she want to go out with me anymore?
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Interestingly enough, these guys always try to analyze everything to bits with logic. They always fantasize in their heads about all the possible scenarios of why a girl isnt returning their phone calls. Often, they come up with creative reasons such as: Maybe she isnt answering my calls because her father is in town and she has to spend time with him. Maybe she is ignoring me because she doesnt know how much I love her. Maybe shes just playing hard to get. Maybe she cancelled our date because she has to work tomorrow morning. Maybe she said I am too good for her because deep inside, she loves me and wants me to be happy. Maybe she doesnt want to go out with me anymore because of childhood trauma. She just cant trust nice guys like me anymore. Well, I am sorry, but if a girl is ignoring you or breaking up with you, theres only one reason: SHE ISNT ATTRACTED TO YOU ROMANTICALLY. Remember the love balance scale from the previous chapter? When a girl does not want to go out with you, it is NOT because of the external forces, it is because her attraction for you is not strong enough. It has nothing to do with a busy schedule or childhood trauma.
It also has nothing to do with how much you like her. You could give her all your love and she would still reject you. Your love for her really does not mean anything to her. Heres my first dating bombshell for you
Smart Dating Rule #1: Its Not How Much You Like Her, But How Much She Likes You That Counts!
Most guys let their feelings blind them as soon as they meet a hot chick. They start fantasizing about spending the night with her or even building a future with her - when the girl is not even showing ANY romantic interest in them. In some cases, the girl doesnt even NOTICE them. Heres the bottom line: SHE HAS TO LIKE YOU FIRST BEFORE YOU CAN START ANYTHING WITH HER. Sadly, most guys do NOT realize this. They think: Since I think she is the most wonderful person in the world, she must feel the same way about me! Uh-huh. Wrong! She does not care about how much you love her; she only cares about how much SHE likes you! Think about it. If a fat chick with a black beard tells you she loves you, are you going to marry her on the spot? No way! The same thing is true for women. If a girl does not like you, then youre just like the fat chick with a beard. No matter how hard you try, shes not going to marry you because she is not attracted to you at all. You can buy her a house, give her flowers, take her to Paris, and shower her with tons of other gifts. She may take your gifts, but shes not going to make you happy at all because she does not like you in the first place.
On the other hand, if you have a girl who loves you with all her heart, she will try her very darn best to make you feel happy. There are NO limits to what a girl would do for the man she loves. She could be working a 60-hour job, but shes still going to find time to go out with you if she likes you enough. Every once in awhile, you hear on the news about a bad boy who beats up his wife or girlfriend. The guy hits and abuses the poor girl every day, but when the police finally take him away, the girl stands up for him in court, cries for him, and even waits for him to get out of jail. Why? Because the girl is super-attracted to him! See what I mean when I say its not how much you like the girl, but how much the girl likes you that counts?
Comparison Chart
Average Frustrated Chump Smart Dater - Thinks that a girl should - Understands that his own like him back because he feelings have NOTHING to loves her. do with the outcome of the situation.
When it comes to dating, women are the choosers. Men pick, but women choose. At each step of the dating game, a girl has to give you the permission to advance before you can take things to the next level. (Otherwise, its called sexual harassment.) Let me show you what I mean:
If she likes your style or looks, she will let you approach her. If she likes your approach, she will let you talk. If she likes the conversation, she will give you the phone number. If she likes the first date, she will give you a second date. If she likes you holding her hand, she will let you kiss her. If she likes your French kiss, she will let you
Get it? Okay. Heres a classic scenario: A guy meets a hot blonde at work and its love at first sight but only on his end. He starts following the girl around like a puppy and soon becomes her new best guy friend. He hides his feelings for a couple of months until he cant take it anymore. One day, he just snaps and tells the girl that he loves her. The girl freaks and says, Im flattered. But please dont ever bring this up again! Why is the girl reacting in such a negative manner? Because she never expected this to happen in the first place. She never gave you the permission to hit on her. Think about this: if a really ugly friend of yours suddenly told you she loves you all of a sudden, would you marry her? I think not! Remember: a girl must give you permission before you can take things to the next level. Otherwise, youre just invading her personal space and she wont be too happy about it. You cant just walk up to a woman and kiss her. Thats called sexual harassment. Women want safety and comfort. So if you surprise her with a I love you when shes not even remotely interested in you, youre just setting yourself up for rejection.
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If a girl wants you to advance, she will let you know. Women DO give out subtle clues to guys they are interested in. Some these clues are included in their body language:
Common Signs That Show A Woman Likes You (Body Language)
Smiling Blushing Touching Winking Flipping or playing with hair Playing with button/shirt/accessories Intense Eye Contact
While it is useful to recognize these body language signs, I find it much easier to keep everything simple. A lot of love experts tell you a woman must like you if her ankles are positioned in a certain way and her neck is tilted at whatever angle and shes looking at you from whatever angleblah blah blah. Guess what? I dont agree at all. I actually think it is dangerous for these experts to mislead their students with these body language signals. Why? Because most guys EXAGGERATE the amount of interest a woman may have in them. After reading about some body language tips from a love doctor, they see a FRIENDLY smile from a woman and immediately think, This girl wants my dick! This is fatal - especially in a professional environment. A lot of women are merely being nice when they smile at
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you. And the failure to recognize nice from niiice can cause you a lot of embarrassment. So how do you tell if shes interested? Well, its quite simple. You test the waters and ask yourself the following question: Is she receptive of my advances? For example, lets say youre meeting a girl at a club. You begin by smiling at her. If she turns away and stares at the other guys, then shes NOT interested. If you still approach her without her permission, youre only going to embarrass yourself, get it? But lets say she smiles back sweetly. Then you can nod and smile again. If shes still receptive, shes giving you permission to approach her. See how this little trick can save you a lot of embarrassment? You can use it to screen out all the cold women! The same principle can be applied to the rest of the dating game. If she touches you, she will probably let you hold her hand; if she lets you stroke her hair, she will probably let you kiss her. Get it? I know how much we guys love real life examples. So let me give you a couple of real life examples:
Signs A Girl DOESNT Want You To Advance.
1) She ignores you when you smile at her. 2) She keeps turning AWAY from you when you try to approach her.
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3) She seems to be bored when you talk to her. Like she makes absolutely NO effort in talking talk to you. Or maybe she just answers your questions politely when her mind is clearly elsewhere. 4) She keeps checking out all the other guys while you make small talk. 5) She hesitates when you ask for her number 6) She doesnt return your calls
7)
1) She smiles back when you smile at her. (Shes giving you permission to approach!) 2) Shes interested in talking to you. She asks you questions, comments on whatever youre saying, and answers your questions. (Shes giving you permission to get to know her!) 3) She touches you. (Shes giving you permission to touch her!) 4) She gives you her phone number. (Shes giving you permission to ask her out!) 5) She goes on a date with you. (Shes giving you permission to take things to the next level!) 6) She lets you hold your hand. (Shes giving you permission for more physical contact possibly a kiss!) 7) She lets you stroke her hair. (Shes giving you permission to kiss her!) .
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8) She lets you into her house. (She TRUSTS you and therefore gives you permission to advance!) 9) She lets you sit on her bed. (She MAY be giving you permission to cuddle! 10) She keeps grinding her hips on you. (Shes giving you permission to show her your prowess!)
As a man, your job is to learn to recognize these signals and make good use of them.
Dating Tip: Always Test The Waters First!
Dating is 50% leading and 50% reacting. Always TEST THE WATERS and watch the signals she sends you. Decrypt these signals and use them to determine whether you should advance or retreat. You will save yourself a lot of embarrassment this way!
A lot of times, guys are so blinded by their own lusts and emotions that they fail to see any of the signals women are giving them. Thats why they have no idea when they should advance and when to back off. Dont make the same mistake. Stay objective.
Comparison Chart
Average Frustrated Chump Does not seek permission. Invades a girls personal space. Does not recognize any rejection signals or buying signals. Moves too fast. Makes a girl feel. uncomfortable
Smart Dater Tests for signs of attraction before advancing. Does not invade a girls personal space. Moves slowly. Gets permission from women before advancing. Makes a girl feel comfortable and safe
38
It is extremely important that you stay objective while youre dating a woman. Most guys tend to project their own feelings onto their dream women. For example, they think that just because they like a girl, a girl should like them back. And when the girl doesnt, they get very upset. Heres a general rule: never try to read a womans mind. Why? Because you are probably going to be wrong. Whenever we try to read a girls mind, we're not actually reading her thoughts. Were actually explaining her action in a biased way in order to justify our opinion of what she should be thinking about. For examplewe might think She probably doesnt want to get into a relationship with me yet because shes still hurting from her past relationship. Bullshit. If you were the guy she REALLY wantedshe would be DYING to have you. Similarly, you should never believe a womans words 100 percent especially if shes playing mind games. Im going to teach you one simple trick you can use when youre not sure if a girl likes you or not, or if youre getting lost in one of her mind games. I call it the action compass.
Next time you talk to a woman, never mind her words just focus on her action. I can bet you money that a woman ALWAYS has a certain intention in mind when she throws a tantrum or plays mind games. They play mind games because mind games can usually help them get what they want. And very often their intention will show through their action. A woman can make up stories to tell you, but she cant make up her actions. Let me show you what I mean: 1) If a girl tells you she loves you verbally but shes being a bitch to you otherwise, then shes just lying about her love for you. If she truly loved you, she shouldnt be acting like a bitch, would she? If a girl whines about something stupid, watch her action closely. Chances are she is just using the something stupid to get something else. Dont be annoyed by the something shes telling you about. Does her action show shes trying to get attention from you? Or maybe approval? If a girl hesitates when you ask her out, even if she says yes you know youre in trouble because her tone and body language shows shes just being nice. Unlike most guys, who will be VERY happy cause theyre blinded by their feelings and dont realize that the girl is only going out with them to be polite, you know you have to work extra hard during the date to impress her. A girl is calling you names and hitting you on the chest. But is she being playful about it? If so, then it doesnt matter if she calls you
2)
3)
4)
5)
the biggest jerk on earth! Her actual action shows she likes you quite a lot. A girl agrees to go out with you but doesnt show up at the date. Well, no matter what excuses she makes up after, her action still shows shes a bitch!
With a little bit of practice, you can use this action compass to navigate your way out every time you get lost in one of her mind games or tantrums.
Dating Tip: The Action Compass
Always use the action compass whenever you get lost in a womans mind game or tantrum. Dont bother to stick around and get all emotional with her. Remember: you cant beat a woman in her own game, so just get the hell out!
Comparison Chart
Average Frustrated Chump Projects his own feelings onto a girl. Focuses on what women SAY instead of what they DO.
Smart Dater Remains objective. Focuses on what women DO instead of what they SAY.
According to the love balance scale, attraction cuts through everything. It doesnt matter how strong the exforce is - as long as the attraction is stronger. So stop whining about your height, skin colour, or baldness. Dont cry about your girl cheating on you with another guy. Dont complain about your girls shyness. At the end of the day, attraction cuts through everything. If your girl were more attracted to you, these problems would be solved automatically. She would stop cheating on you. She would stop flirting with other guys. She wouldnt care about your height, age, or skin color. She wouldnt care about her familys opinion. Heck. She might even elope with you if she liked you enough. Sojust stop whining about things you cant change and work on her attraction for you instead. Keep your girl attracted to you, and she will stay with you for life.
Comparison Chart
Average Frustrated Chump Whines about his age, height, looks, job, wealth status, baldness, and just about everything else.
Smart Dater Focuses on keeping a woman attracted to him because at the end of the day, attraction cuts through everything.
Since attraction is based on feelings, not logic, it is very important that you attract instead of chase. Attracting a woman means communicating with her sexual feelings and building a connection with her directly. Chasing a woman means using logic to convince her that you would make a suitable mate for her. This is what most guys do. Unfortunately, if a girl is not attracted to you romantically, no amount of chasing will make her stay. Sure, she might use you for a short while, but shes going to leave you sooner or later for another guy because she wasnt attracted to you in the first place. If you look around, you will see that the guys that are really good with women are the guys that communicate with women sexually. They arent the guys that shower a woman with attention. They arent the guys that beg and push a girl into going out with them. They are the guys that
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know how to tease to please and how to flirt for skirt. Well teach you these techniques later in the course.
Comparison Chart
Average Frustrated Chump Communicates with women logically. Tries to chase women. Showers a woman with gifts, flowers, and compliments.
Smart Dater Communicates with women sexually. Attracts women. Knows to tease to please and flirt for skirt.
Heres something you can do right now to stand out from most guys out there: be a challenge. Everybody enjoys a challenge. Nobody likes a mate whos too easy. Think about it: As men, we might sleep with sluts, but we never stick around after. Wussy guys are the male equivalent of sluts. Women might exploit them when they are between boyfriends, but theyre never going to marry or stay with a guy whos not a challenge. Remember the formula we learned in chapter 1: Hope + Uncertainty = Passion The quickest and easiest way to stir up someones romantic passions is to create some uncertainty by acting like a challenge. It will raise the stakes higher on the womans part and make her work harder to keep you. If you never act like a challenge, why would a woman have to worry about losing youever? She already knows that you
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will always like her. She already knows that you will be there for her no matter what. She already knows that she has you wrapped around her little fingers. Jeez. How boring! Furthermore, sane women dont want you to act like they are the only thing in your life thats important. They want you to actually have a life. You arent being Duan Juan when you put a woman above everything else in your life; you are just being pathetic. I can guarantee you one thing. If you dont act like a challenge, a woman will lose her attraction in you sooner or later and go for somebody else.
Comparison Chart
Average Frustrated Chump Gives no challenge. Makes a woman the central part of his life. Acts really needy. Afraid to leave a relationship. Tells a woman that he loves her too early. Tries to please a woman . Seeks approval.
Smart Dater Acts like a challenge. Has a life outside the relationship. Independent. Not afraid to walk out of a relationship any time. Focuses on keeping a woman attracted to him because at the end of the day, attraction cuts through everything.
Smart Dating Rule #4: Attraction Cuts Through Everything Smart Dating Rule #5: Attract, Not Chase Smart Dating Rule #6: Be A Challenge To Create Passion
11) Worry about your race? YES____ NO____ 12) Worry about your _______? YES____ NO____ 13) Do you chase women with gifts, flowers, and compliments? YES____ NO____ 14) Have you ever given a woman a gift or flowers on the first five dates? YES____ NO____ 15) Do you do everything she asks you to do? YES____ NO____ 16) Do you tell her your feelings about her? YES____ NO____ 17) Do you wear your heart on your sleeve? YES____ NO____ 18) Do you try to impress her? YES____ NO____ 19) Do you seek her approval? YES____ NO____ 20) Do you try to please her? YES____ NO____ If you have answered yes to any of the questions, you dont understand your game yet. In that case, you should go back and study this chapter again. Go out and practice the seven dating rules. They are rules that you must follow at all times, with no exceptions. Memorize the rules and do the self-quiz every week, until you have the discipline to follow the rules rigidly. Remember: every time you break one of these rules, it means you have made a mistake with a girl and lowered her attraction for you, whether you know it or not. Make a few more mistakes, and youre going to be out of her life forever.
attraction:
more mature more responsible more successful more hardworking more determined more intelligent more interesting more independent more confident more exciting more sexual
4) Are you very sexual? YES____ NO____ (Explanation: Most of the really successful people and greatest lovers in history were very sexual. A real man is not afraid to embrace his own sexuality. He sees it not as something embarrassing, but as a great force of motivation that can push him towards success.) Not matter how well or how poorly you scored on the self-test, I want you to understand that you can become a more masculine man without becoming a jerk. You can pick up all the masculine traits without becoming an abusive jerk. We will talk more about this in the next couple of chapters.
If you look around you today, you will probably notice that most guys have been poisoned by the media and by the own mothers to believe in the nice guy culture. Everybody on T.V says women want to find a good man that they can love. Women go onto talk shows to cry about how they cant find a non-abusive partner. Everywhere, women talk about meeting their soul mates. Lastly, according to New-Age feminists, guys are supposed to control their sexual urges and pretend they want everything from women except sex. But you know what? A few decades of talk shows and misinformation arent going to change 5 billion years of evolution. What women want today hasnt changed much from what women wanted millions of years ago. Sex is still the key to reproduction the reason were here on earth. Dont buy into the garbage that women dont like sex. Talk to any attractive women, and you will see that the bestlooking women always have REGULAR sex. Think about it. If they hate it so much, why are still they doing it?
Social-Biological Conditioning
Soif women love sex, why dont they admit it? The reason most women SAY they dont like sex is because they are afraid of being labeled as a slut. Society has conditioned women into thinking that sex is only for tramps and whores, and that you should never sleep with a guy until you know him really well. As a result, a lot of women repress their sexuality for fear of being branded as a slut or ho.
In short, as humans, our sexual urges have been repressed by our social conditioning. Some scientists have suggested that despite its potential for immense physical pleasure and the crucial role that it plays in propagating the species, sex nevertheless is sometimes a source of anxiety, shame, and disgust for humans, and is always subject to cultural norms and social regulation. In todays modern society, sex is threatening because it makes us acutely aware of our sheer physical and animal nature. (Goldenberg, Pyszczynski, Greenberg, & Solomon, 2000) But once again, a couple hundred years of modern social conditioning cannot undo five billion years of natural evolution. No matter what society tells us, we still respond to the same sexual signals as our ancestors did billions of years ago. Let me give you a quick example: Imagine a girl standing of you, wearing a small, blue mini-skirt that just manages to cover her small tight ass. Her white crop top stretches sideways to cover her ample breasts. Her soft golden hair flows beautifully over her perfect shoulders. She smiles at you as you look into her deep, blue eyes. Lets say youve just met this girl at a party, and you know NOTHING about her yet except that shes one of the most beautiful girls youve ever met. Ask yourself honestly: Would you feel at least a bit attracted to this girl? Next, imagine a fat, ugly chick in front of you. Her fat legs are sitting on a pair of old, stinky sneakers. Her hair is all messy and gross. Theres fat squeezing out of the old dress shes wearing. As she smiles at you, you can tell she is missing a front tooth. Would you feel attracted to her at all?
Nowlets say that this fat, ugly chick is the BEST wife you could ever have. The girl cooks like a chef, works like a farmer, and sucks like a hoover. She promises to do all your chores for the rest of your life and to never nag, lie, cheat. She loves sex too. Every day you get home from work, you will be find your oversized princess lying in bed, dressed in her plus-sized lingerie, winking at you seductively with her fat knees up over her head. As for the more attractive girlthere are always tons of guys flirting with her and she cant cook at all. She also gets upset when you dont give her enough attention and she whines when you dont call her enough. Which girl are you more attracted to now? Probably still the prettier girl. Why? Because you cannot control your DNA. Logic tells you that the fat woman would make a better wife, but your genital tells you the skinny girl would be better in bed.
ID
The id is completely unconscious and contains your instincts including your libido (sex drive). The superego contains the rules and restrictions of society. Think of it as your social conditioning. The ego is the logical self the part of the mind that controls your behavior. It acts as a mediator between the id and the superego. When it comes to love and romance, a womans libido tells how she should be feeling. Just like you cant control your attraction for a beautiful girl, a woman cannot control her attraction for a masculine guy.
In the middle of the attraction egg is a malleable yolk that represents a womans sexual state, or how horny she is for you. Outside the yolk is her resistance. This is an impenetrable wall of resistance that you cannot infiltrate with any kind of physical power. However, it does let one thing go through: feelings. To attract a woman, what we want to do is to send feelings through her resistance wall and into her sexual state. As more feelings build up within the malleable yolk, it will have no choice but to expand
Sexual State
Sexual State
At this point, her attraction for you should overcome whatever social conditioning that has been imposed on her.
Emotions, Desire, and Action The Three-Step Approach Of The Smart Dating System
The Smart Dating System follows a strict three-step approach to attracting women: Emotions, desire, and action. When we first meet a woman, we calibrate her emotions. We drive her fear away and make her feel comfortable. We then arouse her curiosity and match our feelings with hers to create a bond between us. Using the techniques shown in this course, we then convert her feelings into desire and anchor onto her desire in order to amplify it. Finally, we take physical action to advance things to the next level.
Smart Dating Rule #4: Attraction Cuts Through Everything Smart Dating Rule #5: Attract, Not Chase Smart Dating Rule #6: Be A Challenge To Create Passion Women like masculine men that are sexual in nature, although their social conditioning tells them otherwise. But just like a man cannot control his attraction for an attractive girl, a woman cannot control her attraction for an attractive man. To attract a woman, we send feelings through her resistance in order to arouse her sexual state. We can do this with the three-step approach. The three-step approach consists of: 1) Calibrating a womans emotions. 2) Anchoring and amplifying her desire. 3) Using physical action to advance things to the next level.
Chapter 4
Once a guy catches their attention, they begin to check out his 3) Face The hair Is it messy or is it cool? Pimples Are there just a few? Or does his face look like a volcano? Eyes Do they look smart and confident? Glasses - ARE THEY CLEAN? Do they fit the guys face? Cleanliness - Is the face dirty? Cuteness - Is the face cute? As soon as they are done checking out the face, the next part they check out is *SURPRISE, SURPRISE* not the abs or biceps, but: 4) The shoes. Are they clean? Do they fit? And only when theyve finished examining the above do they turn their gazes to 5) The shoulders, the chest and the butt. Do you see a pattern in all of this?
Women look at the opposite of what men look at when men check women out. While men go right for the tits and arse, women go for the accessories such as the hair and glasses. The good news is, these are things we can actually control.
example, if you have a big face, dont wear a pair of tiny glasses. By the way, make sure your glasses are clean all the time. Girls hate smudged glasses. Of courseyou will get to enjoy the ladies a lot better if you dont have to view them from a dirty window! 3) Wash Your Face Wash your face often to keep it pimple free. A few pimples are fine, but a big volcano on your face is just plain scary. 4) Shoes Make The Man Wear clean shoes wherever you go. Make sure your socks match your shoes. By the way, runners are for running, not dating. 5) Dress Nicely Dont overdress because some girls find that gay, but at least pay a tiny bit of attention on what youre wearing from now on. Women love details, so keep that in mind when you dress! And if youre absolutely clueless in this area, watch a soap opera and see what the actors wear. 6) Try to wear a shirt 7) Lips If youre planning to kiss women, you better keep your lips soft. Use lip balm.
7) Teeth Go to the dentist at least twice a year. Brush your teeth and floss daily.
generally have more control over their lives. Girls know this too. Remember: You have to be able to love your own body before girls can love it too. Carrying two hundred pounds of excessive fat on your body isnt going to help you. Its just going to send a pretty clear message to the ladies that youre a lazy slob. So get off the couch and get onto a treadmill! Having a lean, healthy body can do wonders to your confidence. Exercise can make you healthier and you will be able to enjoy the ladies longer. Most important of all, working out at the gym releases the natural testosterone you need to be a strong, masculine man.
Getting A Tan
By the way, a tan can do wonders to your body. It can make you much leaner and more attractive. If you dont like sunbathing, consider purchasing one of those self-tanning lotions on the net.
Chapter 5
person's attitude towards a situation can greatly affect its outcome. Heres an example:
Dating is the same. You must learn to fail before you can learn to succeed. Lets face it. Youre not going to get everything right the first time. Youre not going to strike a home run on your first try. But if you learn something new every time, youre making progress. The key here is to have creative persistence. Without creative persistence, Thomas Edison would never have invented the light bulb or the battery. Without creative persistence, you wont ever get better with women.
Creative Persistence
Creative persistence is more than just staying the course no matter what. It is the ability to make adjustments and corrections before trying again. If you learn from your mistakes with women, youre going to be ahead of most guys already. Most guys out there never bother to learn from their mistakes. They just make the same mistakes over and over with different women.
Comparison Chart
Average Frustrated Chump Is afraid of rejection. Whimpers and cries silently after a rejection, only to make the same mistakes again later on with another women. Never gets anywhere.
Smart Dater Sees rejection as the key to success. Persists creatively. Learns from his mistakes and never makes the same errors again. Improves every time.
Furthermore, keep in mind that there are numerous reasons as to why a girl might be turning you down. Real life isn't like Sex And The City. Not every woman you come across is going to be on the make. Most are going to be married, in a relationship, or simply not interested in meeting anybody at the moment. (70 percent) Some are going to be lesbians. (Around 5 percent) Of the 25 percent who are left, some have just been hurt greatly by other men and will need time to heal. Some are just cold and antisocial. And some just don't see you as their type. Don't be offended by the last. Every woman has her own ideal image of a guy. There is no reason to take things personally. All right. So she doesn't see you as a potential lover. Whats the big deal? Move on. There are lots of other fish in the sea. Remember, while you might be devastated by a rejection initially, in a few years you will only laugh when you think about it. Think about the first time you were rejected. How devastated were you back then? But do you still feel the same now?
and see how she reacts. If she flirts back, theres a chance she might like you. But if she ignores you, she probably doesnt like you at all. As you flirt with a woman, make sure youre just flirting for the sake of bringing her pleasure, NOT for the purpose of picking her up. Only flirt with women because youre a natural flirts who likes to make all the women around you to feel GREAT, but NOT because you want anything in return. This is an almost foolproof way to avoid rejection. After all, if youre just flirting casually and not trying to pick up anyone, nobody can really reject you, right?
A good way to lower your chance of rejection (and your fear of it) is to test the waters first. Remember the bombshell from chapter 1: Its not how much you like a girl that matters; its how much she likes you that matters. So if you can make sure shes interested in you before you even ask her outthe bumpy road to love is going to be a lot smoother. Always test the waters first before asking a woman out by flirting with her casually. Examine her response in an objective manner. Is she responding in positively? Or is she giving you the cold get lost look?
Psychologists use something called desensitization to help clients overcome phobias. For example, if you are afraid of spiders, they show you pictures of spiders and eventually get you to touch them until youre not afraid of them anymore. Basically, they try
to shock your system until you stop responding to these triggers as threats. We can use the same technique to help you overcome your fear of rejection. The first part is to overcome your fear of asking someone out. Next time you talk to an attractive woman in a non-romantic situation, I want you to think about asking her out on a date. Your fear of rejection is going to kick in and youre going to start feeling that fear in your chest. Hold yourself in this state for as long as you can bear before you stop. Keep pushing yourself closer and closer to actually asking her out verbally. You will be able to do it eventually. The good thing about this exercise is that it is all internal. Nobody will know what youre thinking except you!
Once you are more comfortable with the feeling of asking a woman out, try to ask a woman out everyday from now on. She may be a girl from work, a new girl you are going to meet on the bus, a girl youre going to meet at the club, a total stranger or whatever. Who cares? Just ask somebody out. Or at least get her phone number. "But I want to wait for that special someone!" You may argue. Well, if you just hang around and do nothing now, youre not going to know what to do when your dream girl finally shows up on your doorsteps. So do yourself a favor: Start practicing now.
The point of this exercise is to get rejected as much as possible. Since this is your objective, you won't have to worry about being turned down or embarrassed! Just go out and have fun. Who knows? Maybe you will even land yourself a date?
Bad Attitude #2: The But Shes The Only Girl Ill Ever Love Attitude
By now, you might be crying, But I LOVE the girl I want. I only want HER. I dont want to flirt with any other women. She is my world. She is the only girl Ill ever need. Were soul mates!!! Get off you high horse. Here are a couple of hard truths for you: Reality #1: If you dont practice before you approach the girl of your dreams, youre probably going to screw up. Reality #2: There will always be other women in this world. Reality #3: She might not like you at all, and its not how much you like a girl, but how much a girl likes YOU that matters. Reality #4: Youre probably just infatuated with her, and infatuation is not love.
1) Have you been going out with her for more than 6 months? YES____ NO____ 2) Do you know all of her faults? YES____ NO____ 3) Do you know her favorite food movie, band, and colour? YES____ NO____ 4) Have you met her family? YES____ NO____ 5) Do you know all of her friends? YES____ NO____ 6) Do you know any of her secrets? YES____ NO____ 7) Do you know her greatest dreams, fears, and ambitions? YES____ NO____ 8) Does she even know who you are personally? YES____ NO____ If you have answered No to any of the questions listed above, sorry, its not love. Heres the bottom line: If youre centering your whole world on a certain girl, youre way too obsessed with your love life.
universe out there? Most important of all, how important do you think this girl really is, compared to the billions of stars out there? Does the universe care about you? Or the fact that youre crazy about a girl you dont even know? Youre right nobody cares.
when deep inside youre feeling so good you feel paralyzed. If you do suffer from this mindset, then maybe you were raised in a family that did not believe in showing affections in public. Here are some of the exercises you can use to purge this unhealthy powerful loner mindset:
Dating Exercise: Meditation
Over the years, Ive realized that while hiding behind a wall may keep a guy from getting hurt by a woman, it will also stop him from getting women. Spend some time meditating on this concept. Decide if you want to put away your powerful loner faade and admit that you DO need women. It is something that you must decide for yourself. I cant force you to make the change for the better. YOU must make the decision for yourself. Remember that love is a fair game. If you choose to play it, then you must open yourself to the possibility of getting hurt No pain, no gain. Get it?
Keep a journal so you have a place to spill your guts. Listen, you DO have feelings so just accept them, okay? Blogs are good too!
Force yourself to reach out and make new friends. Share your experiences with your friends. No man is an island so stop acting like a hermit.
Dating Exercise: Make More Physical Contact
Powerful loners usually keep their hands to themselves. Its time to change that. You need to admit you need physical contact too! Hug all your girl friends. Work on getting a girl to hold your hand on a date. Make out as often as you can. (I will show you how later in the course.)
Dating Exercise: Let Your Horniness Control You For Once
Powerful loners usually keep their feelings under control. They never want to be horny in front of other people because they think theyre above the average guy. Well, if you do want to get laid, then its time to let your horniness control you for once. I want you to stop masturbating until you get laid. Im serious. Buy a cheap calendar and hang it on your wall. Every time you slip and play with yourself, mark a big X on the calendar. See how long you can go without getting a new X. From now on, the only way you will get off is with a woman, okay? Let your animal instincts give you the primal drive to overcome your fear of women!
76 Copyright 2004 - Marius Panzarella - All Rights Reserved
Visualize the girl in her underwear when you see her. Actors love using this trick at auditions!
Visualize the girls face after five MASSIVE orgasms. She doesnt look so intimidating anymore, does she?
Dating Technique: Focus On Her Flaws
If you have trouble maintaining eye contact with her, just stare at the bridge of her nose.
Dating Technique: Dissociation Technique
I learned this from an actor friend. Here is what you do: Visualize yourself floating outside your body and watch the conversation from a third persons point of view. Youre going to be much more objective with the conversation!
Now that weve looked at the attitudes you should avoid, lets look at the attitudes you should pick up.
Am I wearing the right shirt? Where should I touch her now? What is she smiling at? How do I impress her? What am I doing wrong? Does she like my car? How do I hold her hand? Can I go for a kiss now? Do I ask for a second date now? As you can see, the average guy worries too much about the whats and hows of dating. Listen, dude. Your mind cant be on so many things at once. If you start thinking too much on a date, youre going to end up screwing up your own game. Herere a couple of techniques that can help you become more playful with women:
Dating Technique: Care About Adventure, Not Outcome
Next time youre out on a date, focus on the wonderful experience of being out with a woman, not on getting a second date. If a woman thinks going out with you is fun, you will automatically get a second date!
Dating Technique: The Playfulness Generator
1) How much fun can I have tonight? 2) How far can I make this girl go? 3) How wet can I get her? 4) What do I find interesting about this girl?
Good Attitude #2: The I dont Care Attitude
Most guys worry too much about getting results. As you probably know already, guys usually do better in the dating game when they arent expecting to fall in love. Women swarm all over you when you dont want to date them. But when you do, they reject you. Why? Because youre probably so worried about impressing your date that youre acting all needy and desperate and losing your natural male charm as a result. Women like powerful men. And a powerful man never has to worry too much about a particular woman (at least not early in the dating game) because he has TONS of women chasing him, get it? So if you pick up the I dont care because I am already a player attitude, women are going to find you much more attractive.
Dating Technique: Act Like a Player!
Whenever youre around women, walk tall and act like youre already getting five blowjobs from five supermodels every week! Girls will start seeing you as more attractive.
Furthermore, if you worry too much about results, then you will never have the guts to take any risks and thats the worst thing you can ever do because you will be limiting yourself.
Failure always comes before success. You MUST learn to fail before you can succeed. If youre swinging a baseball bat for the first time, youre probably going to miss. Dating is like baseball. You must try and try before you get it right. Some guys think that failure is not an option because they are madly in love and cannot stand rejection. This is quite sad, as in many of these cases the girls they are in love with dont even like them at all. These guys dont understand the fundamental dating rulethat its not how much you love like a girl, but how much a girl likes you that counts. Once again, guys MUST learn to let go before they can experience success with women.
Dating Technique: No Day But Today
From now on, I want you to go out and live like today is your last day on earth. The world is going to end tomorrow so you better be adventurous and do all the things youve only dreamt of doing. Go out, flirt with strangers, hit on hot chicks and do all the wildest things youve never done before. I know youre probably afraid of what people may think. Well, who cares about what other people think if its your life? And to be honest with you, people secretly admire adventurers. You will probably get more attention and respect for doing crazy things than for sitting at home doing absolutely NOTHING. Listen. Players dont care about consequences. They are in the game for the ADVENTURE, not the outcome. You cant predict the outcome so just enjoy the experience, get it? Trust me. Just go out and be crazy and do crazy things and I guarantee you will get laid like crazy!
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1)
Initial Meeting Phone Number Date Hold Hands Kiss Cuddle Touch With Shirt On Hands under Shirt
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2) 3) 4) 5) 6) 7) 8)
9) 10)
Foreplay Sex
To go to from step one to ten, you will have to keep advancing. The trick to doing this is to keep working and working to get her ready for the next level. For example, if she isnt ready for a kiss, keep flirting with her till she wants one. If she doesnt want to take her bra off, sniff her neck and cuddle with her till she puts your hands on her breasts. Shes worried about sex? Turn her on more with foreplay till shes begging you for it. Heres a good one. Tease her by saying, All you have to say is please. If she says no, go back to cuddling and touching. Eventually she will be screaming YES. Dont worry if you hit a few obstacles. Every time you bump into a wall, just see it as an opportunity to find out more about the girl. This is all information you can use later. See it as narrowing down a list of what she might like. Eventually you will find her sweet spot. No pun intended.
Dating Tip: Always Keep Advancing!
Always keep advancing! And if you encounter resistance, dont confront it head on. Go AROUND it instead!
By the way, if you dont advance when a girl expects you to, shes going to lose interest in you sooner or later. Like if shes been expecting you to ask her out but you never do, then in a couple of weeks shes going to say screw this guy and mack with another guy. Or if she keeps grinding her hip on yours but you still do not make sweet love to her, shes going to think youre gay. See why you must keep advancing?
Remember how you used to play truth or dare as a kid and did the craziest things with your friends? Have the same mindset when you're hitting on women. Always be DARING. If you're shy, chances are you aren't daring enough. So take this as a challenge and dare yourself to keep pushing the boundaries. DARE yourself to say hi to her. DARE yourself to hold her hand. DARE yourself to kiss her and touch her. As for the "truth" part, always tell yourself at the back of your head that she does like you. And it's up to you to uncover that truth. Your ultimate goal is to make HER tell YOU that she likes you. Even when you can sense she does like you, don't quit until she actually says it and proves it to you!
Chapter 6
In many ways, a needy guy is a girls worst nightmare. My friend Betty once went out with a needy guy who would phone her like every hour. Bad, bad, bad. She almost suffocated from the whole experience. While there are SOME girls that like playing mommy, most girls see neediness as a big no-no in a guy. After all, she cant feel safe in your arms if youre not even strong enough to be secure about yourself. To a girl, the insecure guy is like a fat chick to a guy - very unattractive! Most women can detect insecurity from five miles away. Some example traits of an insecure and needy guy include: 1) Being over-possessive. Always give a woman some breathing space! She cant like you if she does not feel comfortable around you.
Dating Technique: Always Leave Some Breathing Room
Hot women break up with their boyfriends all the time because they are too needy. As soon as a needy guy ends up dating a hot chick by luck, hes scared of losing her and starts doing all sorts of stupid things like calling her 10 times a day. Well, guess what? You can never really possess a woman physically, you control freak. The more you try to possess her physically, the faster she will break up with you, get it? I dont care how hot your new girlfriend may be. Just dont be over-possessive. If you do, youre going to be single again very soon.
2) Being showy. Lots of men try to show off, act cool, or simply say or do things just to attract attention or
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compliments. Wrong. If youre truly confident, you should radiate charm. You dont have to bring it up every five minutes. Remember the golden rule show, not tell.
Dating Technique: Hide Your Bottom Card
When you play Poker, you always hide your bottom card so nobody knows what it is. Dating is no different. Dont ever show your bottom card to a woman. Let me show you what I mean. For example, if youre the owner of a construction company, you can just tell her youre in construction. Dont tell her youre an entrepreneur with a Porsche, get it? Women love playing detective and getting information out of you so let them. Dont ruin their fun by offering information about yourself. If you tell them too much about yourself, they are going to find you boring by the second date and dump you by the third. You want to remain mysterious! Furthermore, hiding your bottom card will let you come across as MUCH more powerful and dominant. In Poker, if everyone knows what your faced-down card is, then there isnt any point to playing since you cant bluff. In dating, if a woman knows everything about you already, youre going to appear as a lot less powerful. Powerful people are powerful because nobody knows just how powerful they are. Cult leaders never reveal anything about themselves. Politicians never let you know about their backup plans. Armies always hide their true strengths until they attack
Do the same with women. Dont boast too much. Let her find out things about you. This way, she has absolutely no idea about how exactly powerful you are, so she will just think youre a real powerhouse or guru, get it?
3) Being negative and speaking badly of others. And were not just talking casual funny remarks. You know how some men ramble on and on about people and events? Dont do it.
Dating Technique: Dont Act Like A Whiny Bitch
Has a beautiful woman ever ruined a date for you because she acted like a whiny bitch even just for once? Just not so long ago, I went out with this beautiful girl. We were having fun until she bumped into some girls. After talking her friends, she turned towards me and said I hate those bitches! Ouch. Whos the bitch here? Listen. Talking about other people ALWAYS creates a negative atmosphere, and thats the LAST thing you want on a date. So just dont talk about any negative or unhappy stuff, okay? Do not say ANYTHING bad about other people in general and try to stay cool the whole time. I dont care if someone scratches your car or if the waiter forgets to bring the cheque. The assertive man never loses his temper. So neither should you.
4) Being indecisive. Dont be the wimp who always asks her what to do. Make up your own mind. Be in control. She cant feel safe around you if you cant even make decisions for yourself!
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Women love it when their men are in control. Its their secret fantasy. So dont act like a little wimpy going out with his mother when you go out with a woman, okay? When you walk into a restaurant, choose where to sit. Just say Lets sit over there and take her hand. If she makes a suggestion about where to sit, say something like No. Lets sit over there. It seems like a nice spot and just take her there. No further questions. I am not asking you to be a control freak. I just want you to start acting more assertive. Most guys are too weak in this area. Women love to surrender completely to a guy. So make their darkest fantasy come true!
5) Being pushy. Confident guys dont need to push their way into a date or into the bedroom. Remember: the more you push, the more a woman pulls away! 6) Trying too hard. Its easy to tell youre a needy person if youre always too over-eager. 7) Being defensive. Some guys tend to get pissed in response to a womans questions of negative mood. A major sign of weakness. 8) Boring. Insecure guys are usually boring because they never talk about anything fun. 9) Asexual. Insecure guys are usually afraid of showing their urges because they are afraid of ruining their powerful loner self-images. Well, if a woman didnt
want sex, she would be dating a rag doll instead of a man, wouldnt she? In short, instead of being needy and insecure, you need to be ASSERTIVE, which means youre confidently aggressive.
Dating Technique: How To Be Assertive 101
1) Do not express anger and annoyance while on a date. Always remain calm, even when you total your car, okay? 2) Speak up and learn to say NO. Women tests guys all the time even at a subconscious level. They act like little brats and see if you will let them get their way. If you do, they will see you as a wimp and dump you. But if you dont even budge, then they will have more respect for you. Have the You dont have me fooled for a minute, dear attitude every time a girl throws a tantrum. 3) Look at people when you talk to them. Stare at her eyes, not at her boobs! 4) Ask for help if you need it. The real man realizes hes not allpowerful and isnt afraid of asking for help. 5) Be in charge. Youre taking the woman out, not the other way around!
Start acting more assertive, and the women will notice a difference in you almost immediately.
Become a leader:
Masculine males are natural leaders. They are the alpha males of the pack. Here are some ways to become a leader: Take on protges. Teach other guys one of your strengths. Let others see that you can be respected. Treat everyone good. The most successful CEOs are the ones that treat everybody (including the janitor) good. Be approachable, and others will come to you. Learn some effective communication skills. Take some public speaking classes. Make other guys feel good. Compliment and thank them whenever you can. Acknowledge their accomplishments. Take initiative. Dont be afraid to step up to a task. Do not wait to be told to do something, simply do it. Share the credit and shoulder the blame. Dont be afraid to be wrong.
Pump Iron
During intense weight training, your body further stimulates the release of testosterone. In other words, pumping iron at the gym can help you increase your testosterone and become more of a man.
Learn To Say No
The masculine man knows how to say no. In contrary, saying NO can be very difficult for wussy guys with low self-esteem because they think they have to meet the expectations of everyone. Be a man, and learn how to say no to a woman.
Be More Adventurous
The masculine male is always adventurous. Hes never afraid of trying new things. Here are a few ideas on how you can expand your comfort zone and be more adventurous: Break out of your daily routines. Drive home a different route every day for a week and shop at a completely new grocery store every month. Learn a new sport. Learn a new hobby. Travel more. Learn a new language. Go sky-diving.
Walk Tall
If you want to be a real man, then you have to walk like a real man. Lift your chest up whenever you walk!
Be Ambitious
Real men are ambitious guys that shoot for the moon. Insecure men set goals that are really small because they are afraid of not reaching them. (Thats if they set any goals at all.) The masculine male likes to aim high and sets goals that are seemingly impossible to achieve. Then he works hard until his dream becomes reality.
Have Charm:
Casanova had charm. Kennedy had charm. James Bond had charm. By charm, I mean being attentive in a smooth way. People who are charming always know where they are going. This is a big turn on for women because they can just lay back and savor the moment. If you still dont know what I mean, rent a James Bond movie and watch him closely.
Be Sexual:
The real masculine male is a sexual beast. He knows he has a great sex drive and when he sees a girl he wants, he knows he will have her.
Sensual: Women love details. So be sensual and attentive. Thoughtful: Remember that a girl wants to feel special. She wants to know youre thinking of her. Remember the golden rule: Show, not tell. A gift is just a symbol that youve been thinking of her. Just make her feel special, and she will be yours. Romantic: This involves appealing to a womans five senses and making her feel as if shes in paradise. Romantic men always know what a woman wants and how they can give it to her. Mysterious: Women love trying to figure a man out. Stay mysterious! Intelligent/Educated/Cultured: Intelligence is always a bonus. The truth is, lots of women nowadays think brains are more important then looks. This is due to the fact that resource gathering in the modern world is more associated with intelligence then mere strength. Of course, who would want to go out with a barbarian?
Chapter 7
Postures
When you walk, always walk upright with your head held up and your shoulders back. Be proud. Dont hunch.
Dating Exercise: Good Standing Posture Stretch
1) Stand straight with feet together. 2) Put your hands behind your back, with your fingers interlocked and your palms facing upwards. 3) Turn the palms down and notice the twisting movement at your elbows. 4) Inhale deeply. 5) Bend forward while exhaling. At the same time raising the arms until they are stretched out.
Note: Do not bend your elbows. They should remain straight throughout. Keep your head down and keep stretching your arms a bit higher and higher. 6) Remain a moment in this position, holding your breath. 7) Return to the standing position slowly, without unlocking your fingers. 8) Repeat this exercise a couple of times.
It is very important to stay in an open position while youre sitting during a date. Avoid the following positions: 1) Hands behind neck. Guys love putting their hands behind their neck. But guess what? Its quite disrespectful on a date because it shows you think youre superior. 2) Crossing arms across chest: If you cross your arms across your chest, youre closing yourself and not listening very well.
3) Elbows on table, hands rubbing nose. This is the most offensive position you can ever use. It basically means you think you know much more than the girl youre talking to.
Movements
Try to slow down your movements as much as possible. Remember that you can create mystery and intrigue by simply slowing down. People who are in control do not have a need to hurry. They are always relaxed because they know they are in charge of the situation. Every movement a confident man makes is slow and almost calculated. He just knows when to pick up his cup and when to making a tasking motion with his hand. You know what I mean. The opposite of this is flaming, which has long been associated with homosexual men. A lot of women find this disgusting. So dont do itjust slow down. If you dont know what to do with your arms, simply leave them relaxed and uncrossed. Dont start waving all over with them!
Dating Technique: Slow Down!
Next time you meet a woman or go on a date, I would like you to try the following: slow down as much as possible. When you talk, talk slowly. When you move, move slowly. Why? Because slowing down will make you come off as a much more confident and mysterious person. Dont believe me? Heres your assignment for this week: rent any old James Bond movie. Really observe the way Bond moves. See if hes ever in a rush when there arent any bombs exploding around him.
Remember, a man who is in control has no reason to be in a hurry. They are always relaxed because they just KNOW they are in charge of the situation. Every movement a confident man makes is slow and almost calculated. Just like James Bond, he just knows when to pick up his cup and when to raise an eyebrow. Women know this, and thats why they go for the strong, silent type. Want proof? Okay, heres a more recent example. Remember Joe Millionaire on TV? Not the smartest guy, is he? But women find him dead sexy. Hes not exactly what I would call the most articulate person in the world, but all the ladies (including my own mother) dig him because of his body language. If you observe the way Evan moves on TV, you will find that hes just about the slowest guy on earth. Want more examples? Okay. Just watch any episode of Blind Date or the 5th Wheel. The strong, silent and slow type ALWAYS win and get picked at the end. As for the hyperactive goofballs, they almost never get the girls. Now, who would YOU rather be? The stud or the goofball?
You can also do wonders with your facial expressions. Always keep your facial expressions serious and mature. There is no need to laugh out loud. You may have a nice mature smile, but dont start acting all goofy because it shows a sense of insecurity. (Hiding behind jokes and body gestures.) But smiling slightly is good. Women love men who are happy and positive. Try to keep your head a bit tilted horizontally. (Chin towards neck.) This always makes you seem more mysterious and mature yet down to earth. You will be able to make wonderful eye contact in this position too. You may do
small things with your brows such as squinting them a bit and then raising an eyebrow to show some interest. But try to keep things simple as less is always more. Heres a quick exercise for you to practice your body posture and movement.
1) Stand up and walk slowly. Remember to walk tall with your head up and shoulders back. 2) Practice turning your head slowly in this direction. Count how many counts it takes you to fully turn to the side and then try out other speeds. Like if you find 4 counts too fast, go for 5. See what speed works with you the best. 3) Make eye contact with various objects in your room as you walk and turn your head. Try out various patterns such as: 4) Turning your head to make eye contact without stopping. 5) Stopping to turn and make eye contact. 6) Make eye contact and then start walking towards the object. And so forth. 7) Walk over to a chair slowly and sit down. Remember to open up and keep your body back. 8) Go out and practice. Next time you go to a mall, walk slower and turn your head slowly as you check out the window displays. Who knows? You may catch a glimpse of the reflection of a girl checking you out!
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Remember that if you master the art of body language, a whole new world of communication will open up for you. You will become a far more accurate interpreter of what other people are thinking and feeling, and appear as a much more sensitive person then most men. Something I like to do is to watch the television with the sound muted. I love to study actors and analyze their body language. I also love to mirror their movements for practice.
Voice Tone
If you want to turn a woman on right away, you better have a deep, sexy voice. Your voice always creates a first impression with every girl you meet. Most players have a FABULOUS voice and very good communication skills. They can talk their way into anything especially into a girls pants! Here is what marks a deep, sexy voice: Resonance How well your mouth resonates your voice. Musicality How musical the tone is. Is it all flat and boring, or does it sound rich? Articulation How well your articulate your words. Or do you just babble a lot? Here is how you can improve your voice, no matter how whiny or high-pitched you may sound: By talking slower and deeper. Draw in a deep breath before you say something. And talk SLOWLY. I cant emphasize this enough. It will definitely help your articulation a lot.
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Also, remember that slow means confidence and power. Women will find you much more mature because you are thinking before you speak. Break off your sentences with pauses often. The women will be holding their breath and dying to see what you have to say next. Remember, anticipation is the key! You may combine this with serious looks for even better results. For example: Have you ever met someone whos just(pause) as (serious look) venerable as you are deep inside?
Great speakers know how to build anticipation in their speech. They know when to pause such as right before important words and ideas. Film actor Harrison Ford is a great speaker. Watch his interviews. You will find he speaks VERY slowly almost as if hes searching for his words. And guess what? Women find him sexy!
Now lets work on your voice a bit:
Dating Exercise: Tape Recorder
Get a tape recorder and record yourself speaking. This way you can hear yourself as women hear you. By the way, if you havent done this before, it may be very freaky to hear yourself on tape. The voice you hear is probably going to sound VERY different than the voice you hear in your head!
You can also use a tape recorder to tape yourself speaking with your friends. This way you can hear yourself speaking natural, unstructured dialogue. What do you think of your voice? Do you have a deep, round tone that women find sexy? How clear are your consonants? Is your voice pleasant to hear?
Here are a couple of simple exercises you can try to improve your speech.
Your optimal pitch is your natural speaking pitch and the pitch you should use with a woman because its deep and sexy. However, this is a note that is lower than the note we usually speak during the day. We tend to lose our optimal pitch because the voice has a tendency to drive itself up. For example, when were excited and use more energy to project our voice our pitches goes upand gets stuck up there. You can discover your optimal pitch by saying the word he fast and hard. Kinda like when youre coughing. Just repeat it and attack it as if youre coughing. Thats your optimal pitch. Another way to find it is to say an exaggerated uh-uh as if you mean no way. If you have trouble finding your optimal pitch, try this one last method: Take a big yawn and let your voice slide down. Your voice should become rounder and more pleasant near the bottom. Thats your optimal pitch.
Once youre reacquainted yourself with your optimal pitch, practice speaking down there. You will find yourself with a much rounder tone. You may need to find your optimal pitch over and over because we all tend to lose it throughout the day. But reacquainting your voice with it should be no problem because this is a very easy exercise.
Dating Exercise: Resonance Exercise
For a start, try to feel your chest resonate when you speak. Inhale and take a big yawn, and as you go down, let out on a long vowel or a consonant-vowel sequence (e.g. aaah, oooh, eeeee, mmmaaaa, mmmoooo, mmuuu, baaa, beeee,). You can even do this in the car!
Some of you may have a very nasal voice. If you have heard yourself on a tape recorder and think your voice is too nasal, then your soft palate is probably being lazy, remaining dropped and therefore blocking air from reaching your mouth. In that case, you need to learn to lift your soft palate when you speak. To find your soft palate, imagine youre singing the highest sound you can sing. Dont actually sing it. Just IMAGINE it with your mouth closed. You will feel an area lifting up at the back of your mouth. Thats your soft palate. Now, try this again in front of a mirror, with your mouth open, to see your soft palate lifting up. Pretty cool huh?
Now add an ah behind every word as you read the following phrases. Really emphasize on the ah and open fully when you say it. King Kong becomes King-Ah-Kong-Ah Ding Dong becomes Ding-Ah-Dong-Ah Bing Bong becomes Being-Ah-Bong-Ah Ling Long becomes Ling-Ah-Long-Ah Now record yourself saying these sounds. Do you sound less nasal? Incorporate the same technique to your everybody speech and with practice, you WILL be able to sound less nasal.
As for the musicality of your voice, I must say that it is a shame that most of us live in North America. Standard American English is simply not as musical as more romantic languages such as French. However, there are a few things you can do to develop musicality in your voice.
Dating Exercise: How To Work On Your Tone
Try putting a slight emphasize on important words, including 1) The name of the person youre talking to 2) .Verbs, adverbs and nouns that are associated with color and imageries such as love, beautiful, red. A word of warning though, remember to keep your voice DEEP as you do this. The last thing you want to do is to sound too feminine. Daaar-liiiinng. How beeeeeaaaautiful! You know what I mean.
A lot of guys sound boring because of their fading tone. They run out of breath before they finish their sentences! Practice counting 1 to 10 while gradually increasing your volume as you speak. Repeat this until you know just how much breath you have in your body. This way you will know when to pause to take breaths Next, substitute words for numbers. Read out simple sonnets and nursery rhymes. As you get more comfortable, work with other materials such as newspaper articles.
Dating Exercise: Practice Sonnet Shakespeares Sonnet 18
Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Thou art more lovely and more temperate. Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, And summer's lease hath all too short a date. Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines, And often is his gold complexion dimm'd; And every fair from fair sometime declines, By chance or nature's changing course untrimm'd; But thy eternal summer shall not fade Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st; Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade, When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st: So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.
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Articulation means clarity of speech. You can improve your articulation (and stop stuttering in front of girls) by doing tongue twisters. For my favorite tongue twisters, please see Appendix A at the back of the book.
Dating Exercise: Sample Tongue Twisters
You need unique New York. The lips, the teeth, the tip of the tongue. Topeka, Bodega. The sixth sick sheiks sixth sheeps sick. Red leather, yellow leather. Rubber baby buggy bumper. Sushi chef.
If you are serious about developing a sexy, irresistible voice, you should go look for some speech training tapes or CDs. Practice really makes perfect when it comes to speaking.
Part 3: EmotionsDesireAction!
Chapter 8
Write Down: 1) 5 things about the physical attributes youre attracted to. 2) 5 things about the personality of your dream girl 3) 5 hobbies she may be interested in.
You should also figure out what type of women youre attracted to. Do you like sporty chicks? Or do you like classy,
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professional workers? Or maybe you want a teacher who loves working with children? This is quite essential to the next part: where to meet women.
If you like a specific kind of women, then go to places where they may hang out!
Generally, you will put yourself in a higher probability if you go to places where women outnumber you like 10-1. My personal favorite is the dance class. Be it jazz or ballet or ballroom, you will probably be the only guy in the whole class. And guess what? All the women will be hitting on you.
Dating Technique: Let Women Outnumber You!
To increase your chances, go to places where women outnumber you 10 to 1. This happens a LOT in dance classes.
Dating Technique: Volunteer Your Way Into Paradise!
Most volunteer jobs have females outnumbering guys 10 to 1. Also, today most volunteers are younger college students, etc who are there to pick up work experience. This means they are going to be young and cute! These girls should also make nice girlfriends because no cold, lying, cheating, bad girl who enjoys playing guys would waste time volunteering! They would rather spend all their time cheating on guys instead! When you volunteer, try to find a volunteering job you actually enjoy. Do you like art? Work at the art museum. Keep in mind that the volunteers who work at your destination will probably share the same interests as you. What a great basis for a relationship!
The same goes for the city you live in. Always be looking out for more opportunities. If you are from a small town, you may want to move to a big city. An excellent location is LA, where every waitress looks like a future Oscar winner. Be creative as you search for your hunting grounds. Dont be afraid to pick up women in ordinary places such as the supermarket. Remember that girls love the idea of meeting their soul mates accidentally and being swept away by the moment.
From now on until you have a girlfriend, I want you to go out at least ONCE every weekend with friends. If youre already going
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out with friends every weekend, then good for you. But if youre a couch potato, then its time to get out of your shell and meet some real people! Try rotating between different groups of friends. You will expand your social circle in no time.
Comparison Chart
Average Frustrated Chump Tries to hunt for women at just one location. Never goes out. Doesnt have a social life.
Smart Dater Meets women anywhere. Goes out with his friends all the time. Meets new girls through his friends.
Unless youre Tom Cruise, you cant just walk up to a woman and start macking. You have to take small, measurable steps and make sure she feels safe and comfortable. Similarly, you cant just walk up to a woman on the streets and surprise her by hitting on her. Shes going to think youre a freak. Remember: no girl likes to have her personal space invaded by a stranger. Lets say youre walking down the streets on a bright, sunny day, minding your own business. A man suddenly pulls up besides you and says, I really like the shirt youre wearing. Hi, my name is. What are you going to think? How are you going to feel? Probably something like, This guy is creeping me out. What a weirdo! This is exactly why you cant just approach a girl and hit on her on the street. Yes, there are some rare occasions when a guy can succeed, but its probably not going to happen for most people. (I may write a more advanced textbook on street pickups in the future.) Sohow can you meet women anywhere if you cant interrupt a stranger? By becoming part of their world. Lets say there are two people walking on the streets. Theyre not part of each others world. They are in their own little bubbles. In this case, theres no way for them to build a connection with each other. But if the two people are sitting togethersaylike at a bus stop, then it makes MUCH more sense for one of them to start chatting with the other person.
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Soif youre a college kid hoping to get a girl, dont go drooling around campus and approaching every girl you see. Instead, approach girls that are sitting down or waiting in line with you. Approach girls after class, at the bus stop, or on a bench. But dont just walk up to a girl randomly to ask for her phone number. Always wait till a girl has stopped before you approach her. If a girl is walking, it means shes trying to get somewhere and does not have time to chat. By the way, if one of your friends know the girl you want, always get your buddy to introduce you to her whenever possible. This way, you wont be a stranger and she will feel much more comfortable already.
Direction Of Approach
When you approach a woman, always approach her from the front. Let her see you first. Women do NOT like surprises from strangers. Remember the first time a stranger called you or tapped you on the shoulder from behind you? Did you get more cautious usual? You dont want this reaction from a woman when you approach her. You want her to feel safe and comfortable with you.
her direct view. Then make direct eye contact with her and smile slightly. If she smiles back, you know she acknowledges your presence. If she looks down or blushes lightly, wait for about forty seconds and see if she steals another glance at you. If she does, it means you can approach her. But if she avoids your eye contact and looks away, it means she does NOT want you to approach her at all. This simple eye contact test works fabulously because unlike using a pick-up line, it does not put anyone on the spot. By respecting the girls personal space and being subtle about your pick up attempt, you can now approach women without the fear of getting rejected.
Simply look at her and hold your eye contact for at least five seconds. Dont look away until she does. A woman usually lowers her eyes when a man looks at her because shes shy, or feigns interest in something else in the room because she is so darn coy. But this does not mean she is not interested in you. Research has shown that if she looks up again within 45 seconds, shes onto you! If she does look at you again, smiles at her slightly and give her a friendly nod. If she smiles back youre halfway there. Some outgoing women may even strike up a conversation with you or at least say, Hello.
As soon as you meet a girl youre interested in, MAKE YOUR move. If youre too afraid to approach her, at least meet her eyes and catch her attention. Women LOVE spontaneity. They love
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to feel like a romance has just happened out of nowhere. Furthermore, if you dont let your presence known a.s.a.p, she may think youre a stalker when you suddenly appear out of nowhere later. So make your first move now even if its just a smile and a nod.
Whenever you approach a woman, approach her FROM THE FRONT. Let her see you as you approach her. Do not ever approach her from the back. You dont want to surprise her and make her think youre creepy!
Its VERY important that you test a woman with eye contact before you attempt to pick her up. Remember the golden rule: Its not how much you like her, but how much SHE likes you that counts. If you try to pick up an ice queen, youre setting yourself up for embarrassment!
case, just wait for a better situation. The smart dater knows there are tons of other opportunities out there. 2) You arent demanding enough attention. Heres an example: Two guys walk into a house party. The first guy rushes his butt to the corner to sit down and sits down alone. Half an hour later, hes still wondering why all the girls hes trying to make eye contact with are not responding to him. A second guy shows up at the door. There, he pauses and says, Hello, everybody. Having fun? Then he checks out the room quickly and makes quick eye contact with everybody in the room with one clean sweep. His gaze finally stops at a guy talking to two beautiful women in the center of the room. He looks at the guy in the eyes and approaches him slowly, walking tall and moving with confidence. Long time no see. How are you doing, buddy? He smiles as he shakes hands, while keeping his eye contact until the other man looks away. All around him, women are whispering to each other, Whos this guy? Listen. If you act timid, of course youre going to get ignored. If you want attention from women, then you should start demanding attention. Be the guy that women talk about. Here are a couple of tips on how you can get more attention from women at a house party or at a club: 1) Stop at the door when you enter: Stage actors do this when they get onstage. By stopping at the entrance, you will make your entrance more dramatic.
3) Walk straight to a destination in the middle of the room: If you have buddies with you, lead them and let them follow you. 4) Approach the hottest guy: Approach the hottest guy in the room if you know him. Give him a firm handshake and eye contact. Dont look away until he does. 5) Walk tall: Walk with confidence. Lift your chest when you walk. 6) Stay in the center of the room: Dont go off to the sides until you can isolate a woman into coming with you.
Comparison Chart
Average Frustrated Chump Is afraid of attention. Gathers enough courage to approach women. Surprises a woman.
Smart Dater Demands attention. Makes eye-contact with a woman instantly. Tests for permission before the approach.
So heres the bottom line: CHEESY PICK-UP LINES DO NOT WORK! Use them, and you will end up like most guys: Lonely and sexually frustrated! Examples of bad pick up lines: 1) Are you accepting applications for your fan club? 2) Can I flirt with you? 3) Want to taste my dick? (What!?!) I said, "do you want to taste my drink?" 4) You knowyou're so hot, your ass is on fire. 5) Havent I seen you somewhere before? You get the idea.
1) Test the waters: If she doesnt even want to answer back, you know its a waste of time to talk to her. 2) Break the ice: A woman must let you into her personal space before you can calibrate her emotional state with yours. 3) Establish a mutual emotional state: Whatever you say can greatly affect a womans mood. Lets say a woman is feeling neutral and relaxed at the bus stop. If you walk up to her and say something negative like, I hate this transit system. Ive been waiting here for an hour! shes going to quickly switch from a neutral mood into a negative one. She will associate you as a whiner and a negative person to be around. Another example is nervousness. If you approach a woman while youre very nervous and tense, shes going to feel the awkward energy in the air too. On the other hand, if you approach a woman in a cheerful manner, she will probably feel a little bit more cheerful as well. 4) Make her feel comfortable: A woman must be in a relaxed or slightly curious state in order for her to open up to you. Thats what the opening line is for: to get her to open up to you. For example, if you introduce yourself or ask for her phone number right away, shes going to be scared. But if you say something nice that makes her laugh first, then shes not going to mind talking to you. 5) Open up conversation: A good opener can help you to lead a woman into further conversation, where true emotional bonding will take place.
The Situation-Opener
The situation-opener is a great place to start for beginners. Basically, its making small talk with women. Simply pick something out of your environment and comment on it: Example #1: Nice day, eh? Example #2: I love this song Example #3: Great party!
Example #4: Pretty busy here tonight isnt it? Example #5: Quite a crowd. Example #6: Its nice to see the sun. Example #7: Great concert.
The Compliment-Opener
This one is harder to pull off for the beginner. Compliment her on something tiny. Stay away from her beauty and looks. Example #1: Thats a nice book youre reading. I read it last month. Example #2: Nice shirt youre wearing. I think it suits you. (If its a shirt with letteringlike Diva.) The best way to pull the compliment off is by doing a hit and run. Give a woman a compliment and then leave to do something else before she can react. She will probably pay more attention to you from that point on.
The Question-Opener
The last kind of opening line is the question. Here are a few examples: 1) Enjoying the concert? 2) What did you think about the show? 3) Been waiting long? 4) Cabbage for tonight, eh?
something in common! Once youve found something in common, it should be easy to start a conversation with the girl.
Chapter Summary
Where To Meet Women: 1) 2) 3) 4) 5) Hang out at places where women out-number you. Expand your social circle. Let your friends introduce you to a girl if they know her. Do not hit on women that are busy or walking. Always demand attention.
When you go to a party 1) Stop at the door when you enter. 2) Do a quick scan-around. 3) Walk straight to a destination in the middle of the room. 4) Approach the hottest guy.
5) Dont break eye-contact until the other person looks away 6) Walk tall. 7) Stay in the center of the room. The 3 Kinds of Opening Lines: 1) The situation opener 2) The compliment-opener 3) The question-opener The 4 Steps To Approaching Women: Step 1: Eye Contact and Smiling Step 2: Use An Opening Line Step 3: Ask A More Specific Question Step 4: Introduce Yourself
Chapter 9
personality.
our first conversation must be electrifying if you want to ignite a relationship with a woman. This is the time you want to radiate her with your
Remember the personality traits weve learned earlier? It is time to use them! As you talk to her, inject your special personality traits into the conversation to make you seem different then the rest of the men out there. It is very important that you appear as a confident man. Remember that you want to come across as unique, original, interesting and most important of all, desirable. You should also try to make her laugh whenever you can. Of course, you will need to tease her like there is no tomorrow. We will talk more about flirting with women in the next chapter.
1) Make a list of your hobbies. 2) Make a list of your favorite movies. 3) Make a list of your favorite T.V. shows. 4) Make a list of your favorite food. 5) Make a list of your favorite CDs. 6) Make a list of whats important to you 7) Make a list of what you enjoy ding with friends.
It is very important to discover what kind of topics can engage your girl in a conversation. To start off with, you should always discuss your environment. (Think of this as an extension of step 3 in the 4 steps to approaching women.) After awhile, you can talk about: 1) People you both know 2) Your favorite television shows 3) Your favorite movies
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4) Your favorite music 5) Your favorite hobbies And so on. Here are some examples of the lines you can use: Example #1: So whats your favorite band? Example #2: What do you like to do in your spare time? Example #3: Are you a big Sex In The City fan? The key is to find common ground in these trivia topics.
Topics To Avoid
Here is a list of things you should avoid talking about with a woman: 1) Sex 2) Politics 3) Gore 4) Computers 5) Sports 6) Her past relationships / other men 7) Anything negative
8) Money
The first technique is to ask "open questions" instead of "closed questions". Closed-questions are questions that request a "yes" or "no" answer, such as a question beginning with "do". Open-ended questions are questions beginning with "who", "What", "why", "when", "where", and "how". Unlike closed-questions, an open-ended question makes women talk and go into more details. It also shows a woman you CARE about what she thinks. And most important of all, it helps the conversation develop. If you ask a woman a closed-ended question such as "Do you like ice-cream?" you will simply get a "yes/no" answer. And guess what happens after? DEAD AIR. But if you ask her "What kind of ice cream do you like?", she will have to answer something like "Vanilla", which will give you something else to talk about. Here are some examples of open-ended questions: Example #1: "What do you think about the movie?" Example #2: "Who was your favorite actor?" Example #3: "What do you like about the food?" With a little bit of practice, you will be able to have "never-ending conversations" with the women you meet.
Most women like men who actually LISTEN, because very few guys are good listeners.
Think of it as an interview. Youre the host who is interviewing a girlto see if shes good enough to become your girlfriend. (Yeahthats the right attitude, buddy!)
Almost every sentence has a subject word that can be led to the next sentence. Just look for any interesting subject matters that come up when she talks. Here is an example: Girl: Yeah. I know. Its such a sunny day. I wish I could be out on the beach instead of being stuck indoors. You: Oh? Do you go to the beach often? Girl: Sometimes. I like walking by the water. You: Oh? So do I! I love walking by the water and In the first sentence, the subject is the beach. And thats why you ask about the beach. In the next sentence, the subject word is water, which is why you make a comment about it. This method is quite powerful because it can turn any normal opener into a stimulating conversation. With this method, you could start out by talking about some trivial events and then lead a girl into a deeper conversation with you. This is going to build a good foundation for the next step transiting from emotions into desire.
1)
Use a lot of wes: A good way to build connection is by using a lot of wes when you talk.
2) 3)
Repeat her name: Try to say her name whenever you get the chance. Ask them how they feel: Girls LOVE to talk about feelings. Whatever she tells you, make sure you let her know you feel the same way. This will make her think youre the most sensitive man on earth. Combine this with a little bit of teasing, and she will think youre a masculine man whos really sensitive on the inside!
1) Use A Lot of Details: When you talk to a woman, elaborate on all the interesting details. Women LOVE little details. Give her all the sensory details, such as the smell, the sound, and the texture. Paint a pretty picture in her mind! 2) False Choice Questions: This is a technique that a lot of salespeople use. Basically, you phrase a question in such a way that it will be impossible for the girl to say no. Examples: Would you like me to kiss you softly or kiss you passionately? Would you like to go out Thursday night or Wednesday night? Come up with your own examples!
Do Not Brag
No matter how successful you are, if you brag in front of women, she will see you as a little man because the real successful men have no reason to brag. Real successful men are confident without telling everybody about their fancy sports car. Besides, you will appear MUCH more powerful if you let a woman figure you out. Women LOVE to play the detective and find out more things about you - so do not volunteer information up front. Talking to a woman is a lot like playing cards. You DO NOT want to show your hand because once you do, the game is over. She has found out everything about you, so she has no reason to stay!
Dating Technique: Dont Show Your Bottom Card
Dont brag or reveal too much about yourself so: 1) She will think you're even more powerful because you're so mysterious. Just remember, if she doesn't know what your
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bottom/face-down card is, she doesn't know the "limits" to your power. 2) She will enjoy digging information out of you. Women love playing detective - and if you keep your mouth shut she's going to find you really intriguing. (In other words, hot)
Here is an example: What do you like to eat? Ice Cream? Wow. So do I. What a coincidence! I like chocolate the best. What? You like Strawberry eh? Oh. My sister loved strawberry too. Say. Do you have any siblings too? No? Youre an only child? I guess your parents must like you very much then. Oh I am sorry to hear that. Remember that youre going to have to seem very interested in the things she says.
As you talk with her, try to focus on her desires. Remember that human beings all have their own desires. Try to go deeper and deeper until youre at her roots. My personal favorite is to try to inquire about her childhood to bring the little child out of her. Try to ask her to explain why she likes something. And then why she likes the something that makes her like something. Let me give you an example: You learn that a woman likes tall men. So you ask her why. She tells you because she feels safe around tall men. And then you ask her, So you dont feel safe when youre alone? She then admits that sometimes she feels a bit alone. Then you give her a big hug. Or take this for another example: You learn that she is a great Star Trek fan. So you try to inquire more about the subject. Pretty soon, you learn that she likes science fiction. And why does she like science fiction? Because she has always wanted to go into space. And why does she want to go into space? So that she can be free among the stars.
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As you get to understand her, you should begin to formulate a list of her deepest desires in your head. Desires such as: Seeing the world. Flying. Returning to childhood. Etc...
There is actually a very easy to tell what category your girl belongs to. Simply observe her eyes when she talks. Visual thinkers like to look up when they try to remember or figures things out, listeners tend to look from side to side/ear to ear while touchers like to look down. Once you know what type your girl is, you can adjust yourself to her system of operation. If your girl is visualoriented, then use a lot of visual imageries by using phrases such as It looks like and You see If she is a listener, use It sounds like and I hear you, etc. If she is a feeler, use physical contact combined with phrases such as sensation, I feel, Do you feel, feeling and so on. Now, lets look at several techniques you can use to recreate her desires. Remember that you can choose to work with visuals, sounds or sensations in these techniques.
Conversation Tip: Confirm What She Has Just Said
The most basic technique would be to repeat what she has just said. Youre bound to hit the right spots. Example: So you would like to get onto a spaceship and travel aimless among the stars
Conversation Tip: Ask Her A Question
This is when you lead her on and talk about a similar experience. Example: Wouldnt it feel nice to launch yourself up into the stars in a little spaceship?
Conversation Tip: Make a Suggestion
Example: It would be nice to travel across the galaxy and see different worlds.
Conversation Tip: Quote Something
This is when you repeat something from a third source. (Your creativity?) Example: I once read a book about a woman who saw a spaceship traveling in the stars and
Let the girl know that you are interested in the same thing as her. In this case, describe YOURSELF going through the experience. Example: If I could somehow just get off Earth and into the galaxy, I would be.
Imply to her that you will still be with her 6 weeks or 6 months or even 6 years from now.
Example: Maybe a few years from now, we will actually get the chance to explore the galaxy together. After all
Conversation Tip: Let Her Know How Special You Are
Let her know how lucky she is to have found you! Example: Isnt it exciting to learn that after all these years, you have finally found somebody who can truly understand you and is just as exciting about going off into space as you are?
Chapter 10
Eye contact is directly related to love and attraction. We enjoy gazing into a cozy fire or an attractive person, while we turn away whenever we see something ugly or disgusting. When we are intrigued or in love with a woman, we want to gaze at her for all eternity. But when we are bored, we begin to look away to avoid her eye contact. It is quite common knowledge that people who are deeply in love usually gaze at each other much more when talking and are slower to look away when something disrupts them. Go to any bar and you will see couples with their eyes locked onto each other. The whole ceiling could come crashing on them and they wouldnt notice a thing because they are so locked up in their own little perfect world.
In order to fool a girl into thinking she is already in love with you, you will need to increase the eye contact with a girl to about eighty percent of the time when you talk to her. Try to look deeply into her eyes and even through it. Of course, you dont have to count how many seconds you have to look at her. Simply let your eyes be glued to hers a little longer, even during the silences; and when you finally must look away, drag your eyes away slowly as if youre feeling quite reluctantly, and look back at her again as soon as you can. This will shoot the energy level way up to the outer space!
To keep your pupils big and sexy, just look at the most attractive spot on her face.
You may also practice the following exercise to enlarge your pupils at will:
The Charming Glance/Passionate Gaze
Find a mirror and relax. Now, try making different expressions with just your eyes to see its power. Try joy, love, passion, shock, cunning, sadness, joy, etc. Basically, just try to explore the power of your eyes.
Now, close your eyes and think deeply at someone who attracts you. Wish that person is standing in front of you as you open your eyes to look into a mirror. Imprint the image on your mind. Close your eyes and relax for a minute, without thinking about anyone. Now, open your eyes and try making the charming glance again. Let the attractive person cross into your mind so your pupils will grow, making you a much more charming person. Eventually, you will be able to project that charming look in your eyes, making you a very sexy man.
Lastly, you can look into a womans eyes and access how much she likes you. If she keeps breaking off eye contact and shifting her gaze to other parts of the room, then she is probably not interested in you. (Or she just wants to change topics). If her eyes roll up while she talking, shes probably thinking. If she winks at you, then shes definitely flirting with you!
Mirroring
Mirroring is when two lovers move in synchronicity with each other as though they are confirming their newfound affection for each other. You can see it in a singles bar or restaurant all the time. Two lovers reaching for their drinks or lifting their forks at the same time. They laugh together. They frown together. Once a newly met couple has reached this state of complete synchronization, they tend to stay in synchronicity until the outside world intervenes and force them to stop. If you see a new couple mirroring each other, you can almost be certain there is going to be a second date.
While most people would think you could achieve the same results by forcing synchronization (meaning you copy whatever she is doing), it is important to stress that mirroring is mostly the results of sexual chemistry. While you can induce mirroring somewhat, you must already have a fairly strong bond with a girl before you can do it. You must have a good conversation with a girl before you can start mirroring with her. Think of it as going from emotions (talking and sharing feelings) to desire (building a connection) and to action (the physical action of mirroring each other).
her. Follow up by leaning just a BIT more forward. If she leans forward with you BINGO.. .Shes catching on! If not, then move back as if you were just repositioning yourself to be more comfortable. A good safe. 5) Keep strong eye contact. It is ESSENTIAL that you keep good eye contact with her as your mirror her. Look deeply into her eyes for as long as possible every time she speaks!
To test if a girl is interested in you, adopt her body position. For example, if she has one hand on the table, put a hand on the table as well. If she changes her body position right away (subconsciously) to break away from your match, then you still need to do some more work on her!
Once youre in mirroring mode, you will be isolated from the rest of the world. It will be just you and her and time will fly. The next time you glance at your watch, you may notice hours have gone by already!
Touching
Lovers often touch each other, either deliberately or accidentally. However, bonding is also a very touchy subject. There are women who do not like to be touched. There is why you should always wait for a woman to touch you before you touch her. Never touch a woman more than she touches you. Even if she is touching you all over, you should only touch her on her hands, arms, shoulders, and knee. Do NOT touch her thighs, torso or feet.
Girls love that stuff! You could even joke around by twitching an eyebrow and then saying in a serious tone, Hmm. Interesting. It looks like youre going to be meeting a new friend tonight
Prepare To Be Touched
Lastly, if women dont touch you often, then you should prepare yourself mentally to be touched. How you respond to a womans touching is even more important than touching her. If you stiffen your muscles while she brushes you lightly across the arm, she may interpret it as a sign of rejection. So be prepared and be relaxed.
Chapter 11
Making Compliments
veryone loves compliments. Some may be modest or like to play modest, but deep inside, everyone wants to be loved. This is especially true in the Western culture, where every girl is taught they are special and unique, and that no matter how ordinary they may appear to be, deep inside they are the most fascinating person in the world. This is why if you learn how to make a woman feel good by complimenting her the right way, she is going to be very happy. However, massaging a womans ego requires mastery. Its not just a matter of telling her how beautiful she is whenever you see her. Most guys make the mistake of sucking up to a woman, which actually does more harm then good since it will come across as meaningless flattery in the womans eyes. However, there are several keys to making a successful compliment that can make you stand out from the other guys.
Usually its what the girl WANTS to be, rather then what she already is. For example, I can almost bet you money that attractive women are used to compliments on their looks. If she really is beautiful, she already knows it. She doesnt need another ass-kisser to tell her she is hot enough to be a model.
Dating Technique: Dont Compliment A Beautiful Woman On Her Looks
Never compliment a beautiful woman on her body. She already knows how hot she is. Compliment on her intelligence instead.
Dating Technique: Always Compliment An Ugly Woman On Her Looks
If you compliment an average-looking or ugly woman on her looks, she will be flattered as long as you do it in a sincere way.
Your compliment should reflect the ideal self-image of the girl. Before you compliment her, think about what she would want you to compliment her for. What would she most like you to recognize her for? Her intelligence? Her sense of honesty? Or her humor?
Dating Technique: Compliment On Her Ideal Self-Image
It works better to compliment someone on what they WANT to be, rather than what they are. For example, if you already know you have a cute face, it wont be a surprise to you if a girl calls you cute. You may be a tiny bit flattered, but not that much. But if youve always wanted to have a nice set of abs but dont believe that you do, if a girl compliments on your nice stomach, youre going to be flattered.
Chances are, you are not going to know too much about the girl because you have just met her. No problem. Over the years, Ive come to realize that most attractive women want to be praised for intelligence and insights, while less attractive women want to be told how good looking they are. Remember that giving a compliment is a way of showing your approval. Every woman wants to be loved, so if you approve her or something that has never been approved by any other men before, she is going to dig you.
Dating Technique: Show Your Approval
Women are always seeking your approval. Always give it to them. When a girl asks, Do you like my earrings? do not put her down or ignore her. It only takes a moment to say Yes, darling, I love your earrings.
It is also vital that your compliment is about something the girl is responsible for. For example, if you do compliment on a girls looks, dont tell her she has a nice body. If you do that, you are really just complimenting the Creator, not her. Rather then complimenting her on something shes born with, compliment her on something she has accomplished herself such as how nicely her blouse matches with her skirt.
Dating Technique: Compliment On What She Has Accomplished Herself
Let me show you show you a couple of examples: I really like the little inscription on your necklace. Where did you get it? I think I would really enjoy working with you because you seem like the sort of person who would be able to give some intelligent insights on a situation during a crisis while other people wimp out. I love these shoes. They match really nicely with the top youre wearing today. Your blue eyeliners look really nice with the skirt youre wearing today, you know. What nice handwriting you have! I love the way your write your T, I think it reflects your personality (Then I go on) You get the idea!
every minute, after a short while she will become immune to your compliments.
Dating Technique: Do Not Over-Compliment
Do not compliment a girl too often. Your compliments wont mean anything to her anymore if you compliment her too much!
I personally compliment girls only every once in awhile, and when she least expects it. A compliment is always more powerful when the woman is not expecting it. I tend to draw little details out of nowhere and compliment her on it. I also like to mix it with a bit of flirting. For example, she may be cutting some vegetables in the kitchen when I walk in and spank her lightly on the butt. And before she can say it anything, I give her a quick peck on the kiss and say, That was for doing such a good job with these mushrooms. They look so good. Women love it.
Dating Technique: Compliment Her When She Least Expects It
Your compliment will be much more powerful if she never saw it coming!
Every once in awhile, give a girl a reward when you compliment her. Give her a spank here, a hug there. It works like magic!
Do not use false flattery on a woman. Women are very good at picking out the bullshit!
Try this trick. Make eye contact with a woman. Smile. Approach. Then give her a very good compliment and then LEAVE. She will try to figure out who you are or even watch you from afar as you go back to your friends. And when you re-visit her later in the evening, shes going to be much more open to you.
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If you make a woman feel good about complimenting you, shes going to want to compliment you again! But if you make her feel bad about compliment you, then she will never want to do it again!
These types of responses are very hurtful or even insulting to a girl in some cases. The Not really type of response is especially bad, since the man is actually denouncing the perceptions of the girl. And guess what she will do if you keep giving her a negative response every time she compliments you? She will see you as a little man who is not worth complimenting at all. Rather then saying you as modest, she will see you as impolite and insecure. So what should you do instead? Turn the compliment around! Say something to make her feel good for complimenting you! Some examples are: Thats very kind of you! Thanks, You remembered!
Oh! How nice of you to notice! If you can make her feel really good for complimenting you, she will try to find more excuses to praise you in the future. And guess what? During the process, she may suddenly realize shes in love with you!
Chapter 12
nothing more than her best friend. Shell just see him as the guy she goes to when she is between boyfriends. She will date every guy around her except Average Joe, as she just does not feel that way about him. When Joe finally breaks down in front of her and tells her that he loves her, Miss Right will simply say something like I am not ready for a relationship yet or lets just be friends.
other around or even wrestle each other playfully before they suddenly get down to business and start mating. For example, squirrels and dogs love to chase their mates around before they mate. They also like to wrestle and mock-fight. Even though these mock-fights might look pretty violent to a third-party like a human, the squirrels or dogs always know they are just playing. Like all other animals, humans know if they are just playing when they flirt. Women understand flirting much more than guys do, so you can almost guarantee that they always know if youre flirting or not. This means you should never have to worry about offending women or scaring women away when you flirt. As long as you keep it playful, women will know youre just flirting and they will play along.
But if she flirts back, then there is a slight possibility that she likes you. It doesnt mean that she likes you for certain some girls are just big flirts but it means that she doesnt hate you. In that case, tune up the flirting to build up the sexual chemistry. If you keep up the flirting, one of the following is going to happen: 1) She stops flirting: In this case, you know that the girl is just a big flirt. Its better to know it now than later. She becomes attracted to you: If you keep on flirting and a girl does not resist, sooner or later shes going to feel really attracted to you.
Comparison Chart
2)
Average Frustrated Chump Never flirts. Is always serious. Just bonds with emotionally instead of emotionally and sexually. Tries to befriend women. Never tests for attraction before he does something stupid.
Smart Dater Loves to flirt with everyone. Is always playful. Bonds with women emotionally and sexually. Flirts with women from the beginning. Always tests for attraction before going for phone number or date.
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Flirting Technique #1: Make Eye Contact: Most of flirting is done with your eyes. Keep good eye contact on a woman when you talk to her. Just keep your eyes focused on her bit "too long." Flirting Technique #2: Say "Hello" With Energy When you approach a woman, say "Hello" in a flirty way. It will make her think you e sexier than the average geek who walks up to her and gives her a shy "Hi". Flirting Technique #3: Shake Her Hand A Bit Too Long When you shake her hand, let your hand stay on hers for a bit too long and then brush against her hand as you pull back. Do this while smiling and looking into her eyes sincerely. You dont want to come off as a pervert. Flirting Technique #4: Repeat The Womans Name As you talk to her, repeat her name as much as you can. Say her name slow, softly and sensually each time you say it. Example: "Hello, De-bbie, I am very glad you came here..." Flirting Technique #5: Stir Your Drink Stir your drink with a rhythm as you talk to her. The effect can be "hypnotizing" under the right atmosphere. Flirting Technique #6: Lower Your Volume
Lower and lower your volume so she has to lean towards you to listen. Flirting Technique #7: Whisper When she gets close enough, whisper to her. This works well in a bar, when the music is so loud you have to talk in each other ears. Flirting Technique #8: Be Playful Ask yourself the following questions: 1) How much fun can I have tonight? 2) What sorts of interesting things can I find out about this girl? Flirting Technique #9: Use Nicknames When you get closer to a woman, make up a cute nickname for her. Flirting Technique #10: Touch Her Back If she starts touching you, then touch her on the shoulder or arm when you laugh. Increase the frequency of touching as the night goes on. Flirting Technique #11: Wink and Wave Next you meet a woman, wink at her, smile and wave. Flirting Technique #12: Exaggerate Her Movements When a woman does something, do the same thing but exaggerate it. For example, if she raises one eyebrow, do the same thing but exaggerate it. Flirting Technique #13: Leave Her Wanting More
Do what strippers do the guys. Get a girl all hot and then leave her wanting more! Flirting Technique #14: Laugh At Her Jokes Laugh at her jokes whenever she makes one. Touch her on the arm lightly when you laugh if shes already touching you. Flirting Technique #15: Listen To Her Stories Pay attention to what she says. Be focused on her, not on the hot waitress. Flirting Technique #16: Drop A Compliment Drop her a compliment every once in awhile. Not too often though! Flirting Technique #17: Tease Her Incorporate teasing into your flirting. Tease her til she's wet! Flirting Technique #18: Get More Personal Ask her more and more personal questions as the evening progresses. Things about her childhood, etc!
Why? Because teasing is the magical formula that can: 1) Release the little girl inside every woman.
2) Bring out a womans insecurity and desire to be loved. 3) Make women want what they cant have even more. 4) Tame a spoiled woman by breaking down her barrier. 5) Let women know that their men are in control. 6) Create a sexual tension between a man and a woman. 7) Challenge a woman and demonstrate selfconfidence at the same time. Quite powerful eh? So do you tease women properly? By doing what little boys do to tease little girls on the playground.
These tricks work when the girls are 8 years old, and guess what? Women love them even more when theyre 28. So how do you tease a woman? You: 1) Bust her balls as much as possible. (Make fun of her) 2) Send mixed feelings by giving it to her and then pulling back. (Giving them toys and then taking them away)
even see you as a challenge and want to seduce you just so she can dump you and boast to her friends later. (But like shes going to get a chance!) However, notice that there is a HUGE difference between teasing and being plain rude. Telling a girl one of her earlobes is lower than her other is considered teasing, but telling a girl shes a worthless tramp with an ugly face is just plain RUDE. It will get you blacklisted so fast that it wont even be funny. So how do you tease a girl without offending her? By using humor. After all, she cant hate you if youre laughing with you. Right?
result! Remember: your jokes will lose power if you laugh at your own jokes. Let her wonder if youre serious or not.
Another good way to tease a woman is to give her special feelings one moment and then take them away the next. Women like to have their goodies taken away from them every once in awhile. Besides, they cant appreciate how great something truly is until theyve lost it! So make them horny, and then stop. Then go again. It will drive them wild.
For example, you are making out on the couch with a girl. You suddenly stop and then look away. Your girl looks up and sees you staring out the window. She pulls your face towards hers, but you just pull away and continue to stare at the night sky. Knowing that you have something in your mind she sits back and wonders if you like her as much as she likes you. Then without any warning, you turn around and pin her to the coach. And so on. Teasing Technique #7: Stop And Go Lets say youre making out with a girl and shes clearly enjoying what youre doing to her. STOP and pull back. Shes going to want you to continue and start touching you, etc. Ignore her for a few minutes and then start making out with her today but only this time, go further than you were going earlier. If you do this right, she will let you go further because she doesnt want you to stop again. The best thing about this trick is you can do it over and over! Remember that with a woman, you have to keep moving. And just because she wont kiss you and let you touch her boobs doesnt mean she doesnt want to. She just wants more foreplay first. Women love foreplay, remember? If she says stop, simply tease her some more until shes hot enough to advance to the next level. Just keep teasing her until shes begging you to take her. (Remember: NEVER force a woman. Its illegal and plain stupid. Just take things slowly, okay?) If you want a safe shortcut, then cuddle with her. Women love to be cuddled. Remember that women love to
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have feelings taken away from there. So stop and go while you cuddle. And try to refrain from anything too sexual. Simply keep smelling her neck and smelling her neck, but dont kiss her or anything even if shes begging you to. And by the time you actually kiss her, it will send complete pleasure throughout her whole body. Teasing Technique #8: Build Anticipation A good way to tease a woman is by building anticipation and by giving her what she wants. For example, if you touch her AROUND her boobs but not on them, shes going to feel MUCH hotter when you finally play with them. Use this to anchor onto her desire before you finally transform it into physical action. Teasing Technique #9: Send Mixed Verbal Signals Another good way to tease a woman is by sending mixed signals verbally. You do this in old time movies a lot, when the characters say something but really mean something else. Never say I love you to a woman. Always imply it through something else. This will always make them wonder. Or simply say one thing but do another thing instead. For example, you may hold her hands and then drop it as you say Nah. No holding hands this early. But then you take it again. The woman will be too busy to figure out whats happening to put up any defense. She will be delighted to see that there is an inner battle within you as you try to make out your feelings for her. It may even turn her on to think that shes seducing a real man like you into falling for her. Teasing Technique #10: Delayed Gratification
Another method used to send mixed feelings is to never give her anything she wants until you feel like giving it. This is called DELAYED gratification. For example, when she asks for a kiss dont give it to her. But kiss her when you feel like to. Let her know that you wont spoil her like all the other men because youre special and unique. And when you finally give something to her, make sure she knows that youre sensitive and thoughtful enough to remember she wanted so-and-so. Teasing Technique #11: Make Her Say Pretty Please Every once in awhile, tease a woman by making her say pretty please when she wants a favor from you. You can also do this when youre making out. Make her beg you a bit (playfully) before you give anything to her.
Teasing Examples:
Example #1: Instead of telling her you like her, you say "you really like me" in a teasing manner. If you say "I really like you", she may reject you on the spot because it's direct and blatant. But if you say "You really like me" PLAYFULLY, then you can get away with it because you're just joking. You may also accuse her of hugging you or kissing you a lot. And then you give her a hug or kiss back. This will leave her wondering if you're really attracted to her or not. Women love MINDGAMES. They love to pick petals off a rose and say, "He loves me, he loves me not" Example #2: You can make fun of something small about her (don't overdo it though). For example, say one of her earlobes is
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lower than the other PLAYFULLY. (Being PLAYFUL is the key) She will probably go like "No it's not!" Then you look into her eyes and say, "It's all right, you're still pretty." Example #3: Give her a personal nickname or tease her about something that is special to both of you. Like if something funny or interesting happens while on a date, use it to your advantage.
Example #4: Some women like to touch a guy while they talk. When a woman touches you on the leg, say in a serious tone, "May you stop touching my leg?" Then when she seems thrown off, say "Well, if you want to touch me, I would enjoy it even more if you would touch me a little bit closer..." Example #5: Let's say you're cuddling or making out with her, try to smell her neck, kiss her, etc but then SUDDENLY STOP. She's going to be all hot and bothered and ask you what's wrong, etc. She may even put her arms around you to try you to get back to it. After a few seconds, start making out with her again...but more fiercely this time. This is a VERY good way to advance through her boundaries. Example #6: Be unpredictable. While sitting on a bench on a date, suddenly pull her up and then give her a hug. Then you say "I just wanted to hug you." If she asks you why, say "Cause I felt like it" playfully or "I wanted to see if you'd feel good to hug." If she asks you if you think she's good, just say "Well, I think I need a second try first..."
Example #7: Give her your arm French style. Then walk with her for a while. Then stop and look at a window or something. Then when you walk again hold her hand. See how see reacts. If she seems to enjoy it, rub it a little bit. See how she reacts. If she likes it, then continue. But while you're doing this, act like you think she's your best friend. (This will REALLY make her wonder if you do like her or if its all "in her head") Example #8: Ask her about her love life. Then ask, "Do guys find you so beautiful that they are afraid to approach you?" If she says "yes", then say, "Do you let it go into your head?" Example #9: Lets say youve been talking to a woman for a while at a club. Find an excuse to leave her for a bit and then get out onto the dance floor. Dance for awhile, make sure she sees you dancing with your friends, then go back to her and say playfully, What you are still doing here, wallflower? Lead her onto the dance floor. Example #10: A woman needs you to do a minor favor. You smile a smug smile and say, Only if you say pretty please. Whatever she says after, if its not pretty please, just smile say pretty please playfully. Repeat until she gives in. Example #11: Lets say you are making out with a woman and youre kissing her neck and kissing her neck. She seems to be loving it. Pull back, stroke her hair, and ask, Do you like it when I nibble on your neck? If she says no stop, say
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fine playfully and dont neck with her again as a punishment. But if she says yes, ask, Do you want some more? If she says yes, tell her to say pretty please. Example #12: Lets say a woman drops a piece of food onto the table by accident. Shake your head and shake your finger and feign disappointment. Then start talking about all the starving children in Ethiopia. Finally, say, Youll have to make up for the food you wasted. When she asks you how, tell her to give a piece of something to this poor Ethiopian child (while pointing at yourself) from her plate. Example #13: While on a first date, if a woman is clearly interested in you, joke about hooking her up with a guy if she needs any help with men. Example #14: If a girl is clearly interested in you, you can tell her playfully that you have liked her in the past, but do not anymore. If she asks you why, make up a funny excuse, like Because you are too mean to me or Because Ive just come out of the closet. Dont forget to be PLAYFUL when you say the line. Example #15: If a girl is wearing high heels, say something like If youre any taller, you could be an Amazon. One last thing: Remember that a big part of teasing is to be unpredictable. So dont get too comfortable by getting into any set patterns. Be creative with your teasing rather than having the same response every time. Just put yourself
in the proper playful mindset so that you can react to your environment and do the "right" thing at the "right" time.
Practice Phrases
1) Hi 2) How are you doing? 3) Whats the story behind that?
Practice Verbs
aid allure amaze amuse anticipate approach arouse assess assist bait beckon beguile bewitch blame bless bluff boost bribe cajole call catch challenge chastise cheer clarify command conceal condemn confirm confuse consider contest convince correct corroborate court criticize crush dare defy delight direct displease divert dominate dramatize draw duck ease educate elevate elicit enchant endear endure enlighten entangle entertain entreat eschew estimate evade evaluate excuse execute feed force free frighten frustrate
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gag help jumble humiliate humor hurt hypnotize imitate induce indulge inspire insult interview intrigue invite judge lead lecture liberate lure magnetize manipulate mend mimic motivate mystify oppose orient panic patronize please
pose propose purify reject release satisfy scold sedate seduce settle shake shame sicken soothe spoil still stretch suggest summon support suppress surprise tease tempt tickle tolerate understand warn worry worship
Once you have mastered using your voice tone to communicate, you can flirt with women by adding another layer of subtext to your verbal communication. For example, you can say something perfectly normal and innocent and have it mean something else. This is a more advanced form of sending mixed signals.
With practice, you will be able to project your sexual thoughts WITHOUT talking about them verbally at all.
Or, you could ask, Sowhere do you work and how much money do you make a year? In case you havent noticed, I am one of those high-maintenance very shallow men that only care only about that what they can get from a woman. *pause* Youre not like me, are you? Oh, too bad. We could have gone shopping together.
Dont move too fast: Dont rush. Let your girl feel comfortable with each step before you lead her to the next one. Remember: If a girl becomes uncomfortable at any point, she will pull away and you will lose all your chances. Dont move too slowly: At the same time, dont be too passive. If you are too slow, youre going to lose your window of opportunity. Remain in control: Always keep your backbone and remain in control. The moment you let a woman whip you around, shes going to lose all respect and attraction for you. Lead, not push: The more you push a girl into doing something, the more she will pull away. Thats why you lead a woman instead of push her. Use anticipation: Dont forget to stop and go every once in awhile to create anticipation. Be a challenge: Continue to be a challenge and be unpredictable. Continue to surprise your girl.
Chapter 15
Next time you ask for a girls number, I want you to examine her reaction. If she hesitates, then she may not be interested. If she freaks out for a second and then smiles, then shes just being polite
If she seems really happy and blushes, etc, then she probably likes you.
Golden Rules On Getting Digits
First of all, dont leave your phone number and ask her to call you. Some guys think that makes them special because the women have to call them blah, blah, blah but seriouslythis is stupid. There is a dating manual out there that teaches men to hand out business cards to as many women as they can because a few of them are bound to call. Stupid. As soon you turn your back, your business card is going to get trashed. Digits Rule #1: Never offer your phone number instead of asking for hers. If a chick asks you for your number instead when you ask for hers, do not fall for it. Shes going to throw it away. Digits Rule #2: Do not let a girl take your phone number instead of giving you hers. Here are some counters for women who want to take your number: Counter Technique #1: Just smile and get her to trade. Its only fair. You can even do it jokingly, Oh come on. Im only going to call ten times a day. Most women dont want to give out phone numbers because its a big invasion of their privacy. And thats why if you can see through this and joke about it, you will break down some of her barriers.
Counter Technique #2: Bust her and say Oh come on. Youre just going to show it to all your girlfriends and then toss it away. In theory, you should ask for her number AFTER youve talked to her for a while. (And got along) If she sees you as an interesting person, she will probably want to give you her number. And if you dont click with her, theres no point in getting her digits anyhow. Remember: its always easier to give a number to an interesting new friend than a stranger youve met for 30 seconds. As soon as the conversation get REALLY interesting, tell her you have to leave but would like to continue talking to her at another time. There. Youre almost guaranteed to see her again. But if she clearly does not like you and you still keep on asking for her digits, youre just setting yourself up for rejection, get it? Digits Rule #3: Only ask for a girls number after youve talked to her for a while AND got along. Also, remember getting the digits is not your only option nowadays. Dont forget email and instant messenger nicknames. Women give out emails much easier becauseif you turn out to be a freak, they can just block your address or get another hotmail account. Digits Rule #4: Try to get her email and IM nicknames. As soon as you get her number or email, get lost. I mean it. Thats no point in hanging around since you have her contact info. Hanging around more could mean messing up and losing your chance with her. Digits Rule #5: Leave as soon as you get her number.
How long should you wait before you call? At least five to six days. Why? So shell be wondering why you havent called yet and be even more eager when you finally do. DO NOT call her right away. It will make you seem desperate. Good thing only comes to those who wait, so have patience, young Jedi! Digits Rule #6: Wait at least 5-6 days before you call her! When you call herplease do not leave any messages on her machine. My friend Jenny once told me how she got home after a short trip one weekend and found 5 messages from the same guy on her machine. Needless to say, she was very annoyed. Digits Rule #7: Do NOT leave any messages on her machine or send her any text messages. Call her from a pay phone if you dont want your name to show up on her Caller ID. DONT call her too often! Also, dont call her to talk. Only call her to ASK FOR A DATE. Guys only get phone numbers so they can ask for dates, and women know it. So do not call her just to talk. She will think youre the biggest wimp on earth.
Digits Rule #8: Only call her to ask her out! THINK about what youre going to say BEFORE calling her. Have the time and location ready before you ask her out. In fact, have two times ready. Say Lets have dinner Wednesday night or Friday night at eight. What day is better for you? This way it will be less likely for her to run into time conflicts and you will still be in control.
Digits Rule #9: THINK before your call. Have at least two times ready for the date in case she cant make one of them. If she turns you down, really listen to what she says. If she makes a counter-offer, like Sorry I am busy on both days. How about we go out on Saturday instead? then everything is still all right. But if she says something like Im busy, but how about some other time, thats a rejection. You can forget about her and toss her number away. Digits Rule #10: She either counteroffers or she doesnt go. Another trick women may use to fool you is the Can you call me the night to confirm. Ha! Shes just using you! Shes either not interested at all or just using you as a back-up plan. If she cant find a REAL date that night, THEN she will go out with you so you can pay for dinner. Digits Rule #11: Dont fall for the Call me later to confirm trick. Finally, shut your mouth and hang up as soon as she agrees to go out. You dont want to mess up. Save everything you want to say for the big date. Digits Rule #12: Shut your mouth and hang up as soon as the date is set!
"Club dancing" is 10 percent skills and 90 percent attitude. Most people who look great on the dance floor do not have training in ballet/jazz or anything. A lot of them can't even count, actually!
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But these guys are still admired because they always look like they are enjoying themselves. They are the people who can just get up to the dance floor and "go crazy". Dancing is a form of expression, so as long as you learn to EXPRESS YOURSELF through dancing, you'll look like you can dance well! Lastly, keep in mind that most guys are ridiculous dancers. Actually, I take that back. Most guys do not dance at all - so going onto that floor will already score you A LOT of brownie points, no matter how bad you are!
You should try to stay away from normal dating locations such as going to the movies at all costs. Movies are a waste of time. You should be talking to her instead. If the movie is bad, she will blame it on you. And if the movie is great, then she forgets about you. Also, it is much more interesting to do something together than going out on a date. Sometimes going on a date sounds stupid. Know what I mean? Make it something else. Like hiking or dancing. Just dont call it a date.
Dating Technique: Youre Just Hanging Out
Do not take a girl out on a traditional date. Instead, hang out with her as friends while flirting like crazy and having a good time. In fact, when you ask girls out, ask them to come hang out, not go out!
In short, when choosing a location for a date, consider the following rules: Dating Rule: How To Pick A Date Location
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If you follow these rules, then the environment will be working in your favors! Dont forget to make creative suggestions. If she absolutely hates an idea, she will let you know.
If the girl hesitates or doesnt want to answer, then joke and tease her about it. A nice Am I that scary eh? should do the trick.
Dating Technique: When To Go Out
When you first meet a woman, only go out with her on weekdays. This will set you up as an important person who has a social life on weekends. If she asks you about what youre doing
on the weekends, always tell her youre busy even if youre actually just sitting at home!
Lastly, make it clear to a woman that you just want to make friends. This lets her know that youre not a needy, insecure kind of guy. You perfectly understand that the world will still revolve without her! It lets her know YOU are picking her, not the other way around!
case her apartment is hard to find or there are no parking spots, but do not knock on her door until youre right on time.
Dating Technique: NO Gifts Please!
Do not give a woman any gifts on a first, second, third, fourth fifth, sixth, or even seventh date! (Or until she is your girlfriend!) Dont scare her off by making her feel she has to give something back (like love) in return!
After Ive talked to her over coffee and were now good friends, I can then take the girl somewhere else as the second part of the date. The location will really depend on the girl. At this point, I start to tease her more and more while being her friend. I also try to have as much fun as I can with her. This is extremely importantas the whole point of going on a date is to have fun! (aside from getting laid)
Dating Technique: Send Mixed Signals
When youre hanging out with a woman, act like you just want to be friends WHILE youre flirting with her. This will make her wonder, Does he like me?
While I am always being funny, I also always make sure I act chivalrous throughout the date. This includes things such as opening doors for her and walking on the roadside of the pavement. This is to protect her from being hit by a car. If she doesnt know about this you can tell her. She will probably find it very cute. Yes, its true that there are crazy women out there who feel insulted when you open a door for them. Stay away from these crazy feminazis!
Heres how to be a classy gentleman: 1) Offer her your arm. 2) Open doors. 3) Always walk on the outside of the pavement 4) Select the table at a restaurant and pull out her chair. Dont ask her for permission to do any of this stuff. Listen, YOURE taking her out! Be in control!
I also make compliments and tease my date like crazy to drive her mad for me.
Dinner
I usually take my date to dinner only after a first date. (So I dont have to waste any money on a bad date.) There are several rules I go by when I take a woman out for dinner: Choose the right restaurant: I always make sure I can go to a place where I can pay for the most expensive item on the menu. I always try to find a place where the atmosphere is great. This doesnt mean it has to be an expensive restaurant. It just means it has to be special somehow. One of my best dinner-dates happened in a tiny, tiny seafood restaurant near the ocean with just the two of us. Needless to say, we had a nice time at the beach after.
Cruise the restaurant before the date. Take a look at the manual and make sure your face wont cringe when you order. Pay attention to the atmosphere. (Too loud or too quiet?) See if there are any particular tables you want.
I always put on my best manners. No talking with my mouth open, make sure my teeth are clean, etc. Basically, the things your grandma would make you do.
Dating Technique: Table Manners 101
1) Do not play with the table utensils or crumble the bread. 2) Do not put your elbows on the table, or sit too far back, or lounge 3) Do not talk loud or boisterously 4) Be cheerful in conduct or conversation 5) Never cough or sneeze at the table. 6) Never tilt back your chair while at the table, or at any other time. 7) Do not talk when the mouth is full. 8) Never make a noise while eating. 9) Do not open the mouth while chewing. 10) Dont scramble or mix food on the plate. Its sick. 11) Eat soup with the side of the spoon, without noise.
By the way, I always tip the waiter handsomely. Here are a few more rules for a first date:
Dating Technique: Do Not Tell Her Your Love
Never tell a woman on a first date that you like her. It ruins everything.
Dating Technique: Be A Good Listener
Listen to what the lady has to say. She will think youre a sincere person even if youre not!
Dating Technique: Look For Subtle Clues
When a girl asks you Would you like to do whatever, shes not asking, shes implying she wants it.
Keep the crazy driving in the arcade. Do not scare her on the road!
Dating Technique: Keep Your Cool
Keep your cool no matter what happens. Never get angry in front of a woman until youre married. Losing your temper will only make you look stupid.
Good things only come to those who wait, so work on your self-control!
1) Dont talk about politics or religion. She may not share the same view. 2) Dont check out ANY other females. Leave that waitress alone! FOCUS YOUR ATTENTION ON YOUR GIRL! 3) Dont talk about your past relationships. In fact, dont talk about yourself too much at all. Remember the golden rule: keep the focus on HER! 4) Dont make any offensive jokes. Humor is good, until feelings get hurt. (Then its hilariousjust kidding!) Seriously, be FUNNY but not offensive or rude. 5) Dont talk about your sexy kinks. Unless you know sheshmminto the same stuff. (Like unless she tells you first and it happens to be the same thing you like) 6) Dont get into ANY sort of argument with her. Seriously, its going to ruin the whole evening. 7) 8) her! Dont kiss her ass. Dont tell her you love her. Dont even tell her you like
9) Dont be late on the first date. Dont show up an hour early and then wait for her either. BE ON TIME.
10) Dont act like this is your first date in your entire life. Try to play it cool!
1) Do groom yourself properly before you go out. Dress nice! 2) Do flirt with her and tease her like there is no tomorrow during the date. 3) Do buy some fresh condoms AND clean up your room, house or apartment before the date. Just in case! 4) Do give her a big hug as soon as you meet her. Why? A little physical touching right off the bat can be a good start! 5) Do advance through her boundaries and limits subtly. Holding her hand? See if you can get a kiss next, and so on. 6) 7) 8) Do have a stimulating conversation with her. Do act like a gentlemen and open doors for her, etc. Do compliment her. (Not too much though!)
9) Do only go to a place where you can afford to order the most expensive item on the manual. 10) Do relax and have fun!
Chapter 17
1) Are you seeing anybody else? / Hows your love life? This is a VERY common question that women ask on a first date, and also a question that most guys screw up on. A lot of guys freak out when a woman asks them this question. They think, Oh no. If I answer yes, she will think Im a player. So they answer something stupid like, No. Youre the only girl I like. Stupid. Proper Response Examples: Well, I have a couple of prospects right now. (Then wink at her and smile.) Why? Are you hitting on me?
2) How much money do you make? / So what do you do? Most guys will start bragging about themselves at this point. Dont be the same. Good women dont care about how much you make. Only gold diggers do. Just reflect the questions. Proper Response Examples: Enough. (Smile smugly at her.) Why. Are you one of the really shallow women that only care about how much a guy makes?
I am an exotic dancer. But I dont really like it when women treat me like I am a piece of meat. *pause* I have feelings too, you know. Im a gigolo. Im a very shallow man who only likes rich women. So how much do you make, dear?
1) Pouting because of your friends or hobbies Some women will try to get you to choose them over your friends and hobbies because theyre jealous of anything that displaces them. (Football, music, friends, beer, cars, music, etc.) Dont let them. Solution: Try to include her in your activities early on. If she doesnt like them, too bad. She will either have to be flexible, or shes not the right person for you. She must accept the fact that you DO have a life outside of dating women.
2) Complaining and finding fault with your clothes, hair, etc. Solution: Be like, Too bad, I like it.
Application: When you go out with a "diva" that gives you the "This is so boring. I can't wait till you get me home" attitude and doesn't seem to be enjoying your first date, just keep your enthusiasm and be really friendly with her. Keep EVERY moment devoted to HER. But about 15-20 minutes before dropping her off, CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE 180 degrees. Stop paying attention to her and be TOTALLY aloof. Don't talk to her, don't smile at her, and don't respond to her. Don't look at her, period. Heck, pretend you're thinking about ANOTHER girl while you're at it. She's going to think, "Shit. What did I do wrong?" and subconsciously tries to make it up to you. She's going to be MUCH friendlier to you and asks you, "What's wrong?", etc. She may even start complimenting you like crazy. The tide has turned around. YOU have COMPLETE control now! 2) When your girlfriend is turning into a "spoiled brat" Application: Instead of arguing with her, try to just give her the silence treatment instead. Trust me, it will work MUCH better than trying to argue with her. If you argue with her or try to ask her to "change", she's just going to get all defensive and fight with you. But if you show her you mean business by giving her the silence treatment, she's going to freak and try to compromise to make you happy again because she does not want to lose you. 3) When your girlfriend is losing her interests in you. Application: Give her the silence treatment after a date to make HER feel you're losing interest in HER. Humans are always afraid of losing what they have, so she'll probably freak due to her fear of losing you. See...this is a very powerful technique that can TURN YOUR RELATIONSHIP AROUND!
A few warnings about this "silent treatment" technique: 1) It's extremely powerful. Don't abuse it. Use it ONLY on girls that are acting like spoiled brats. Remember that this is a "punisher" - meaning it should only be used when a girl is MISBEHAVING, such as acting like a spoiled little diva or flirting with other guys. Don't give them the silent treatment unless they actually DESERVE it. 2) It's important to have SELF-CONTROL and not break the silence yourself. You're probably going to feel VERY uncomfortable with the silence too...but don't worry...just keep in mind that she's probably feeling even MORE uncomfortable than you are because she does not know the silence is intentional. JUST HAVE SELF-CONTROL AND DO NOT ATTEMPT TO RE-START THE CONVERSATION AT ALL!
Intimacy
Flexibility: She should be flexible and willing to compromise. If she only wants to do things her way, sack her. Self-disclosure: She should be willing to disclose herself to you. If she doesnt tell you anything, sack her. Giving: She should be willing to give as much as she takes. If she takes all the time but never gives, sack her.
Commitment
Respect: She should be giving you the respect you deserve. If she doesnt, sack her. Integrity: She should have integrity and doesnt lust after material goods. If shes shallow, sack her. Loyalty: She should always be loyal to you, as you are loyal to her. If she cheats or screws around behind your back, sack her.
To make a woman lust after you, tease her and tempt her to get intimate with you but do not actually give it to her. Remember the classic rule strippers go by: Tease guys about something they want, and then dont give it to them!
But make sure you give in a little every once in awhile, or else she will lose interest. For example, if she is grinding her hip on your crotch and rubbing you through your pants, then you may want to let her have her way!
This is the path you should take if youre interested in a long-term relationship with a girl. I dont care about what other experts say. They can call me stupid and claim that you should only date a woman after youve slept with her. I will just laugh when they breakup with a girl or end up dating a slut who blows every guy on the street. Remember: The faster you get together, the faster you breakup.
Dating Technique: Delay The Relationship
To build a more solid relationship, do not get together with a woman as soon as you meet her. Play it slow to keep her wondering if you like her. For your first few dates, go out with her as a casual friend while teasing her and flirting with her. After a month or so, crank the chemistry on by dropping compliments every now and then. Then accelerate until she is your girlfriend.
Getting a one-night stand is NOT hard. In fact, I have a bonus report that teaches you how to sleep with girls. I have NOTHING against having casual sex with women I just dont think you should do it with a girl you may love because having sex on the first date change the dynamics of the WHOLE relationship.
Always kiss a girl before you head to her place to avoid the awkward moment when you start making out.
Holding Hands
No matter if youre in it for a quick one-night stand or a long-term relationship, this is an essential step you have to go through before you can kiss her. I will say it again: you must hold a womans hand before you can kiss her! Think of holding hands as a set-up for the big kiss later.
There are many techniques I use to start holding hands with women. Here are some of my favorites ones:
Dating Technique: Hold Her Hand By Teasing Her
Sometimes I take the initiative and take her hand and hold it for a few seconds. Then I take it away and tell her that we shouldnt be holding hands this early. Then awhile later I hold it out as if I am asking her to take it. When she does I take it away and say the same thing. I keep repeating this in a playful heir. And when she finally stops reaching for my hand, I simply grab her hand and hold onto it.
Dating Technique: Read Her Palm!
Sometimes I comment on the shape of a womans hand. Then I use it as a launching pad to give her a palmistry session. And after thatI just dont let go.
Dating Technique: Give Her a Hand Massage
Another alternative is to give her a hand massage right there. This can also lead to a neck massage and shoulder andyou know what I mean. =)
Dating Technique: Rub Her Hand
If youre holding a womans hand, try flirting with her by squeezing her hand or her fingers. Or rub your thumb on her hand. See how she reacts. If she likes it, she will reciprocate. Good now you can flirt with her while walking or watching a movie!
First Kiss
Once youre holding hands with the girl, it should be much easier to get a kiss. Remember, never ask a woman for a kiss. 9 out of 10 times, they will turn you down just to play hard to get. Simply do it. However, if she resists, stop immediately.
Dont ever ask, Can I kiss you?. A real man just goes for it.
Dating Technique: How To See If She Is Ready For A Kiss
Heres a nice trick to see if a girl is receptive to a kiss or not. Stroke her hair lightly and look into her eyes with the passionate gaze. Tell her she has lovely eyes. Or soft hair. Or whatever. If she smiles and seems receptive, move the hand to the back of her head and reach down to kiss her. (I am assuming the girl is shorter then youonce I dated a tall, tall blonde who was 6ft 1 and kissing her was a bit of a challenge!) If she pulls away, then you will have to tease her and work her up some more before you can try again. After the kiss, look deeply into her eyes again. There. Youre one step closer to spreading her legs.
Going Indoors
A good way to invite her into your house would be to show her something. Maybe it is your CD collection or
Always invite a girl home by telling her an excuse. Do not ever tell her to go back to your place so you can sex her up. I am not suggesting that you lie to women. Its just that no woman want to be thought of as a slut. She already KNOWS why youre inviting her back to her place. So make her comfortable by giving her an excuse to go to your place!
To get yourself invited into her house, you will have to play a bit hard to get. My favorite technique is to tell her that I have to go to bed early since I have work the next day, blahblahblah, but then I tell her that I could stay for 15 minutes while I lead HER into her own house.
Dating Technique: Get Yourself Invited Into Her Place
After you take a woman home, tell her that you have to go to work tomorrow and cant stay. But then say you can hang around for a drink for 15 minutes or you have to go to the bathroom. If shes interested at all, she will let you in.
Once youre inside the house, hers or yours, do not make any moves at all for the first 20 minutes or so. Remember that women want to feel safe, so you MUST act like a complete gentleman when youre inside her place. After 20 minutes or so, you may move closer and kiss her on the cheek and then move back away. Then cuddle with her and turn her on. Remember the key to this path is to keep advancing. If she lets you hold her hand then kiss her. If she kisses you back then try to take off something. If she resists then kiss and cuddle some more. Repeat till she has all her clothes off and you get the idea.
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How To Kiss
According to a recent survey, more than half of all women consider their men to be lousy kissers. You cant really teach a person how to kiss as it comes from experience. However, here are some general tips:
Dating Technique: Kissing Rules
Keep your breath fresh. Keep your lips moist. Tilt your head the OPPOSITE way the girl is tilting. Keep your lips soft, tender and open.
Here are a couple of kissing techniques you can use. Remember to vary them to keep things exciting!
Kissing Technique: Triumverat
Kiss her lightly between the eyes, then on the tip of the nose, and finally on the lips.
Kiss her on her top lip, then the bottom lip, and finally both.
Kissing Technique: Lick Her Lightly
Run the tip of your tongue slowly along your girls lips.
Kissing Technique: Kiss Her Earlobes
Gently kiss, nibble, and suck on her earlobe. This trick can drive a woman WILD.
Kissing Technique: Kiss Her Neck
Trace the sides of her neck with your lips and tongue.
Kissing Technique: Front OF Neck
Kiss the front of her neck with your lips and tongue.
Kissing Technique: Tease And Denial
Kiss everywhere but her lips, until she pulls you to their lips. You can also use this trick on other sensitive spots. For example, you can tease one of her nipples by kissing AROUND it until you finally kiss it.
Kissing Technique: The Sensual Kiss
Look in her eyes and whisper you want to kiss her. Press your lips gently to theirs', caress their lips with yours and give her a passionate kiss.
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Rub your forehead with your girl gently and kiss her.
Kissing Technique: Cheek Rub
Make a small "O" with your lips. Press your lips against your girl's skin and suck softly. Lift your lips off a little, move over slightly, and repeat over and over.
Remember not to limit your lips to her lips. There are lots of other places you can kiss. Her neck, her ears, basically any part of the body can be kissed. Just member to drool all over her dedicate body. Remember girls like sensual men.
Cuddling
Cuddling is another crowd pleaser. Women love men who would take the time to cuddle with them. Trust me. Some women can get so turned on from cuddling that they suddenly attack you out of the blue. Dont believe me? Do some field-testing. Next time you get a chance to go on a date, cuddle with the girl. Just
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give her a hug and then cuddle with her like theres no tomorrow. You can also smell her neck, lick her earlobes and whisper sexy things in her ears while youre at it. Just dont stop cuddling. Let me tell you a real story, not long ago I met this new girl and I told her how much I loved to cuddle. Heck, I think I like it even more than sex. I joked casually. Her eyes brightened up and asked me if I would like to cuddle with her. I said yes and we went out the back to the fire exit. We just sat on the stairs and started cuddling endlessly. After about 30 minutes, she was so turned on that she climbed onto me and basically raped me right there. We were lucky we didnt get caught! Trust me, cuddling works wonders in getting into a womans pants. You gotta try it sometime!
Make Out Technique: Cuddle With Her
Next time you get to make out with a chick, cuddle with her till she rapes you!
Touching
Women love to be touched and stroked. Here are a few general rules for touching:
Make Out Technique: How To Touch Women And Make Them Purr Like Pussy Cats
1) Touch her softly and slowly. 2) Constantly change the way youre touching her. Do not keep touching her the same way for more than one minute.
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3) Apply different pressure with your hands. For example, linger your fingers softly on her chest and then suddenly rub it hard for a few seconds and then touch her softly again. 4) Touch her as you would touch a pussy cat. 5) Imagine white light coming from your hands and use this light to heat her body up. 6) Dont ever lose contact completely as your change from one hand to another. 7) Enjoy what youre doing. Admire her body and caress her sensually.
Smell her neck and shoulders for 15 minutes. Simply run your nose and lips over her shoulders and neck smelling her while telling her how great she smells. The same thing with licking. Slightly run your tongue lightly against her earlobes and other parts for 10 minutes. See her as an ice-cream cone and tease her with your tongue. Make sure you dont drool all over her though.
Talking Dirty
You may choose to talk sexy to her. Remember to include lots of details, and try to stimulate her senses with
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your words. Drive her wild with your imagination! You may also describe what youre going to do to her next, and how great it will make her feel when youre doing it. It will drive her crazy for you. Here are a couple of good techniques:
Make Out Technique: Describe Whats Happening
Describe whats happening as youre making out or having sex with her. Remember to use a lot of details. The whole point of this is to paint an erotic picture in her mind! Example: I love the way you smile when I kiss your neck. It really gets me hot to see you so happy.
Tease her with playful questions like Youre a horny princess, arent you?.
Make Out Technique: Make Her Beg
A good way to tease a woman during sex or a make out session is by getting her to beg for it. For example, while youre making out with her, you can say All you have to say is please. Keep doing this until she is screaming PLEASE!
Make Out Technique: Release Her Horny Side
Theres a horny little princess inside every girl. Learn to release it by saying things like: 1) You know you want me to make you feel good.
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2) You enjoy being told what to do by a man. 3) You know you love the feeling of surrendering to your man. 4) Tell your man what you want him to do to make you feel good
Make Out Technique: Command Her
Women love to surrender to a strong man. Try commanding her in the bedroom by saying things like: 1) Spread your legs wide. 2) Kiss my chest..
Do not try to talk dirty until shes very hot and horny. And most important of all, WATCH HER REACTION. If she gets angry, then stop!
Buttocks, anus and perineum (area between vagina and anuslick it to drive her wild!) Arms, elbows and hands Her vagina
Whenever a woman seems to be REALLY enjoying what youre doing to her, STOP. This will make her want you to continue. She will probably put her arms around you and try to get you to go back to doing whatever you were doing earlier. Ignore her. After awhile, go back to whatever you were doing but advance a bit further this time. For example, if you were fondling her boobs over her shirt before you stopped, try to slip a hand under her shirt this time. You can use this trick over and over until you hit home base.
Make Out Technique: Avoid Sensitive Areas
If you avoid touching her most sensitive parts of her body like the breasts, crotch and anus, she will be even more turned on when you finally get to them. For example, circle her nipple with your tongue for a while before you lick it directly. She will squirm when you finally do!
Make Out Technique: Blindfold Her
Blindfold your girl with something like a bra. This will make her anticipate or even fantasize about what youre going to do to her next. It will also stimulate her senses tremendously.
Chapter 19
When you first start dating a woman, dont go out with her too often. Once a week is enough, twice at most!
Try to stall her as long as you can before you ask her to become your girlfriend. Remember: the faster you get together with someone, the faster you breakup.
Relationship Tip: Stall Her!
Do not give a woman too much attention at the beginning. Tease her and flirt with her and do all the usual things, but dont let her know you like her yet. After 5-8 dates, start turning up the romantic chemistry until one of you asks or hints the big question naturally: So are we together? THEN you can ask her to become your girlfriend. I know 5-8 dates may sound like a long wait, but if you are serious about having a long-term relationship with someone, then it is defiantly worth the wait.
Some keys to keeping a girlfriend at this stage: 1) Capture her attention 2) Remain a challenge 3) Stay mysterious 4) Make her laugh a lot 5) Send mixed signals
2)
Stage 3 The Getting To Know Each Other TOO well Period (3-12 months)
After a few months, the Lets have sex 3 times a day chemicals become the Lets settle down chemicals and this is when some serious problems may occur. You may find that some of your fundamental values are different. You may also find that the blonde goddess youre dating may not be so special after all. Flexibility is the key to this stage. Unless both parties are willing to be flexible and compromising, the relationship will fail. If you end up dating a selfish, inflexible woman who never compromises, you should consider ending the relationship. (Actually, end it WAY before like after a first date!) Love is a two way street. If shes not willing to be good to you too, then things are not going to work out.
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Always keep in mind that if a lady TRULY loves you, she will be flexible because she wants to please you. (Just like you want to please her!) This is why it is very important to keep a woman ATTRACTED to you. Some keys to keeping a girlfriend at this stage: 1) Remain a challenge. 2) Be flexible. Compromise. 3) Keep her attracted to you.
As long as a woman is very attracted to you, shes not going to cheat. This is why it is very important to keep her interests level high. Here are some ways to keep the interest level up: Fun and Romance: Well, first of all, if you have used my techniques to attract the girl, you should keep it up. Tease her, flirt with her. Remember how I taught you to tease her till shes blushing in deep red? Or how to drive her crazy with my few moves thats guaranteed to turn her on? Keep applying the techniques to relive the romance. Dont be afraid to love her. Be attentive: Sorry to say this, but most guys do start to slack off after a while. They stop paying attention to their women and end up losing her. Please dont make the same mistake. Notice the details. Do thoughtful things. Leave little messages that say Ive been thinking about you. from time to time. Compliment her when she does something good. Talk to her: Have at least one good talk every week. Maybe before bed. Maybe when youre walking in the park. This will help you solidify the bond with her. I dont care how busy youre with work. If you cant even spare an hour on your girlfriend once a week, then its really your fault if the relationship turns sour. Remain in control: Another big thing. Some guys use the techniques Ive taught them to seduce a sexy girl theyve always wanted, and then after awhile they just give up their control and start kissing the girls ass. Remember: everything Ive said about remaining in control of a relationship still applies after the initial courtship! Never lose control! Be a man!
IMPORTANT NOTE: Under NO, NO, NO circumstances should you be attempting to please her with money and physical gifts. Money and wealth is NOT an alternative for love. Money can buy you sex, but it cant buy you love. I dont care how rich and busy you are. Never, never pamper a woman with money. The last thing you want is a spoiled girlfriend! It will lead you quicker to a breakup/divorce, as the relationship will only become more hollow every time you attempt to bribe her with cash.
Warning Flags
Here are some warnings flags that hint your relationship may be deteriorating: Mood Changes / Irritability: Your girl may be edgy and often in a bad or depressed mood. She may act
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like they are irrigative, touchy, sensitive, argumentive, and hypervigilent. And worst of all, she may not stop nagging about the smallest details on earth. She may also start fights without any reasons. Contact: Is contact between you and your girl trailing off? Is she always too busy to go out with you now? Secretive: Can you sense your girlfriend being more secretive, as if shes hiding something? Routine: Are you falling into a routine with your girlfriend? Have you stopped being adventurous? Separation: Are you more separate than before? Do you plan separate activities instead of doing activities together? Communication: Is she avoiding in depth conversations, especially questions about your relationship? Criticism: Is she suddenly acting like a nagging bitch? Is she over critical of you? Does nothing you do please her? Intuitive: Do you have a gut-feeling that tell you something may be wrong? Distance: Does one or both partners seem to be distant, distracted, or miles away in their thoughts? Is one or both partners daydreaming more than usual?
Look at her actions, not her words. Women's words cannot be trusted because they are not "direct" speakers like we men are. They like talking in circles and going through a thousand places before they finally make a point. And of course, a lot of time they are masking how they REALLY feel. So in short, their words may not necessarily represent their thoughts. For example, a woman may tell you she loves you while sleeping with other guys behind your back. Or she may say, "I hate you" playfully and mean "I love you!" This is why you should ALWAYS look at a girl's actions, not her words. Watch her attitude/facial expressions/actions. How is your girlfriend treating you? Remember: her actions cant lie!
Surviving A Breakup
As a smart philosopher once said, sh* happens. And most of us do end up breaking up with a girl or two some time in our lives. Ive personally encountered a few painful breakups myself. They do suck, dont they? Nowadays, its usually me who leaves a girl, but I have been ditched a few times too when I was younger. Anywaythis is a couple of steps Ive gathered from my personal experiences. ALWAYS figure out what went wrong: Do you know why she dumped you? I don't want to stir up any painful memories, but I think it is necessary to know why you were dumped. If youre attentive, you should probably know the answer already. Also, keep in that what she tells you is not necessarily the truth. But from my own
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experience, the truth is probably already inside you you just have to have the courage to search within yourself for an answer. If she has left you for another guy, always see what he did. Dont just enter into a jealous rage. Is there something the other guy could give her that you couldnt? If so, it must be one of your weaknesses. So how do you fix that up? Remember, if theres anything not working with the tactics you used this timeyou can certainly fix it so you wont have to make the same mistakes next time around.
Remember we humans like to ask ourselves the following question: Whats in it for me? Youve just broken up with her. So whats in it for her if she gets back together with you? You will have to give her temptations. Let her miss the things she lost when she broke up with you. Show her how much you understand her. And tempt her with new things. Flirt with her again. Make HER want to get back together with you. Remember, whatever she will be getting from this new relationship MUST outweigh the problems of the previous relationship. And even then, you will still have to work very hard, together with her, in solving the problems you two had in the past.
Move On
If youve decided to move on, here are a couple of general tips. Workout: Trust me, it works wonders when you do some physical activities to get her off your mind. Of course...seeing all the nice little buns on the treadmills will help too... Get involved with some new hobbies:. Again to take her off your mind. Socialize: with your friends. Meet people, etc. They are going to introduce you to many new girls! Start dating: other women as soon as you feel ready. Remember going out is very casual nowadays. If there are many other chicks that like you cause you're
cute and nice, why not hang around with them for a while? Polish your skills: Re-read my eBooks and really polish your skills for the next round. Remember, practice, practice and practice!!! Remember, breakups hurt is because youre used to a living certain lifestyle and suddenly your whole world has changed. So take a cold shower and try to start afresh. Use this as an opportunity to get into a NEW lifestyle. Lastly, now that youre free of the ball and chains, think about all the exciting, beautiful women youre going to meet!
Chapter 20
Closing
But now, everything is up to you. You can put this book on your bookshelf, tell yourself that youve become a great womanizer, and forget everything Ive taught you. Or you can go out now and practice the stuff. I sincerely hope you will choose the latter. Attracting women is a skill, and just like any other skill it needs to be practiced. So I urge you to please go out and start applying the techniques you have learned from this book. In time, you will see your success. And when you do, please do me a favor and email your stories. As a matter of fact, email me now and tell me what you think of the book. Please give me both the good and the bad. The main reason I wrote this book is because I want to help other men. So if there is a particular part of the book that worked or did not work for you, please email me. I can be reached at mariuspanzarella@datebeautifulwomen.com. Good luck and never give up!
ve done what I can to teach you how to meet, attract, and date beautiful women.
And that's why you should NOT risk embarrassing yourself! Also, men who "gather the courage" to "suddenly tell the girl he loves her" usually do it at the "wrong" time, like when a girl least expects it. Surprises are scary and women don't know how to react. Their NATURAL reaction is to turn you down on the spot ("I have a boyfriend" or "I am not looking for someone right now", etc) just to be safe - even if they regret it later. So, instead of putting the focus on your feelings and worrying about how you can tell her you love her, I want you to focus on getting HER to tell you she likes you. Now, the biggest difference between a friendship and a relationship is that there is sexual/romantic chemistry, and that's why I want you to start flirting with her and drive the chemistry up. It's time to ATTRACT her, not to chase her. Your goal is to get HER to fall for you and eventually ask you the "Are we together?" question. Lastly, flirting with her will allow you to see if she likes you or not. If she ignores you or doesn't respond well to the flirting, then she's not interested in you. But if she flirts back, she may want you!
We have chemistry. I really like him. Would you like to <whatever>? I want to <whatever> NOW. So are we together? Please. Ask me to be your girlfriend now. Do you like me? I like you. Were too different. The door is that way. I want a sensitive guy. I want a guy whos dominant and sensitive. I want to feel safe. I want a real man. I dont like money. Sure, thats why I brought it up. I cannot figure you out. Youre a real challenge. I really like you. Fine. Conversation over. Now shut up. Maybe. - No. I need some space. Without you in it. I am not looking for a boyfriend I am looking, but I dont want to date YOU. I don't know; what do you want to do? - You have nothing planned? Loser. We need - I want It's your decision. You know what I want.
Nothing when you ask, Whats wrong? Everything. What do you like? I want to please you. Its getting late. You arent coming to my bed tonight.
Six thick thistle sticks. Six thick thistles stick. Is this your sister's sixth zither, sir? A big black bug bit a big black bear, made the big black bear bleed blood. The sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick. Toy boat. Toy boat. Toy boat. One smart fellow, he felt smart. Two smart fellows, they felt smart. Three smart fellows, they all felt smart. Pope Sixtus VI's six texts. I slit the sheet, the sheet I slit, and on the slitted sheet I sit. She sells sea shells by the sea shore. The shells she sells are surely seashells. So if she sells shells on the seashore, I'm sure she sells seashore shells. Mrs. Smith's Fish Sauce Shop. "Surely Sylvia swims!" shrieked Sammy, surprised. "Someone should show Sylvia some strokes so she shall not sink." A Tudor who tooted a flute tried to tutor two tooters to toot. Said the two to their tutor, "Is it harder to toot or to tutor two tooters to toot?" Shy Shelly says she shall sew sheets.
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Three free throws. I am not the pheasant plucker, I'm the pheasant plucker's mate. I am only plucking pheasants 'cause the pheasant plucker's running late. Sam's shop stocks short spotted socks. A flea and a fly flew up in a flue. Said the flea, "Let us fly!" Said the fly, "Let us flee!" So they flew through a flaw in the flue. Knapsack straps. Which wristwatches are Swiss wristwatches? Lesser leather never weathered wetter weather better. A bitter biting bittern Bit a better brother bittern, And the bitter better bittern Bit the bitter biter back. And the bitter bittern, bitten, By the better bitten bittern, Said: "I'm a bitter biter bit, alack!" Inchworms itching. A noisy noise annoys an oyster. The myth of Miss Muffet. Mr. See owned a saw. And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw
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Before Soar saw See, Which made Soar sore. Had Soar seen See's saw Before See sawed Soar's seesaw, See's saw would not have sawed Soar's seesaw. So See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw. But it was sad to see Soar so sore Just because See's saw sawed Soar's seesaw! Friendly Frank flips fine flapjacks. Vincent vowed vengeance very vehemently. Cheap ship trip. I cannot bear to see a bear Bear down upon a hare. When bare of hair he strips the hare, Right there I cry, "Forbear!" Lovely lemon liniment. Gertie's great-grandma grew aghast at Gertie's grammar. Tim, the thin twin tinsmith Fat frogs flying past fast. I need not your needles, they're needless to me; For kneading of noodles, 'twere needless, you see; But did my neat knickers but need to be kneed, I then should have need of your needles indeed. Flee from fog to fight flu fast!
Greek grapes. The boot black bought the black boot back. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? He would chuck, he would, as much as he could, and chuck as much wood as a woodchuck would if a woodchuck could chuck wood. We surely shall see the sun shine soon. Moose noshing much mush. Ruby Rugby's brother bought and brought her back some rubber baby-buggy bumpers. Sly Sam slurps Sally's soup. My dame hath a lame tame crane, My dame hath a crane that is lame. Six short slow shepherds. A tree toad loved a she-toad Who lived up in a tree. He was a two-toed tree toad But a three-toed toad was she. The two-toed tree toad tried to win The three-toed she-toad's heart, For the two-toed tree toad loved the ground That the three-toed tree toad trod. But the two-toed tree toad tried in vain. He couldn't please her whim. From her tree toad bower With her three-toed power The she-toad vetoed him. Which witch wished which wicked wish?
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Old oily Ollie oils old oily autos. The two-twenty-two train tore through the tunnel. Silly Sally swiftly shooed seven silly sheep. The seven silly sheep Silly Sally shooed shilly-shallied south. These sheep shouldn't sleep in a shack; sheep should sleep in a shed. Twelve twins twirled twelve twigs. Three gray geese in the green grass grazing. Gray were the geese and green was the grass. Many an anemone sees an enemy anemone. Nine nice night nurses nursing nicely. Peggy Babcock. You've no need to light a night-light On a light night like tonight, For a night-light's light's a slight light, And tonight's a night that's light. When a night's light, like tonight's light, It is really not quite right To light night-lights with their slight lights On a light night like tonight. Black bug's blood. Flash message! Say this sharply, say this sweetly, Say this shortly, say this softly. Say this sixteen times in succession.
Six sticky sucker sticks. If Stu chews shoes, should Stu choose the shoes he chews? Crisp crusts crackle crunchily. Give papa a cup of proper coffee in a copper coffee cup. Six sharp smart sharks. What a shame such a shapely sash should such shabby stitches show. Sure the ship's shipshape, sir. Betty better butter Brad's bread. Of all the felt I ever felt, I never felt a piece of felt which felt as fine as that felt felt, when first I felt that felt hat's felt. Sixish. Don't pamper damp scamp tramps that camp under ramp lamps. Swan swam over the sea, Swim, swan, swim! Swan swam back again Well swum, swan! Six shimmering sharks sharply striking shins. I thought a thought. But the thought I thought wasn't the thought I thought I thought.
247 Copyright 2004 - Marius Panzarella - All Rights Reserved
Brad's big black bath brush broke. Thieves seize skis. Chop shops stock chops. Sarah saw a shot-silk sash shop full of shot-silk sashes as the sunshine shone on the side of the shot-silk sash shop. Strict strong stringy Stephen Stretch slickly snared six sickly silky snakes. Susan shineth shoes and socks; socks and shoes shines Susan. She ceased shining shoes and socks, for shoes and socks shock Susan. Truly rural. The blue bluebird blinks. Betty and Bob brought back blue balloons from the big bazaar. When a twister a-twisting will twist him a twist, For the twisting of his twist, he three twines doth intwist; But if one of the twines of the twist do untwist, The twine that untwisteth untwisteth the twist. Untwirling the twine that untwisteth between, He twirls, with his twister, the two in a twine; Then twice having twisted the twines of the twine, He twitcheth the twice he had twined in twain. The twain that in twining before in the twine,
248 Copyright 2004 - Marius Panzarella - All Rights Reserved
As twines were intwisted he now doth untwine; Twist the twain inter-twisting a twine more between, He, twirling his twister, makes a twist of the twine. The Leith police dismisseth us. The seething seas ceaseth and twiceth the seething seas sufficeth us. If one doctor doctors another doctor, does the doctor who doctors the doctor doctor the doctor the way the doctor he is doctoring doctors? Or does he doctor the doctor the way the doctor who doctors doctors? Two Truckee truckers truculently truckling to have truck to truck two trucks of truck. Plague-bearing prairie dogs. Ed had edited it. She sifted thistles through her thistle-sifter. Give me the gift of a grip top sock: a drip-drape, ship-shape, tip-top sock. While we were walking, we were watching window washers wash Washington's windows with warm washing water. Freshly fried fresh flesh. Pacific Lithograph.
Six twin screwed steel steam cruisers. The crow flew over the river with a lump of raw liver. Preshrunk silk shirts A bloke's back bike brake block broke. A pleasant place to place a plaice is a place where a plaice is pleased to be placed. I correctly recollect Rebecca MacGregor's reckoning. Good blood, bad blood. Quick kiss. Quicker kiss. I saw Esau kissing Kate. I saw Esau, he saw me, and she saw I saw Esau. Cedar shingles should be shaved and saved. Lily ladles little Letty's lentil soup. Amidst the mists and coldest frosts, with stoutest wrists and loudest boasts, he thrusts his fist against the posts and still insists he sees the ghosts. Shelter for six sick scenic sightseers. Listen to the local yokel yodel. Give Mr. Snipa's wife's knife a swipe. Whereat with blade, with bloody, blameful blade,
250 Copyright 2004 - Marius Panzarella - All Rights Reserved
he bravely broached his boiling bloody breast. Are our oars oak? Can you imagine an imaginary menagerie manager imagining managing an imaginary menagerie? A lusty lady loved a lawyer and longed to lure him from his laboratory. The epitome of femininity. She stood on the balcony inexplicably mimicing him hiccupping, and amicably welcoming him home. Kris Kringle carefully crunched on candy canes. Please pay promptly. On mules we find two legs behind and two we find before. We stand behind before we find what those behind be for. What time does the wristwatch strap shop shut? One-One was a racehorse. Two-Two was one, too. When One-One won one race, Two-Two won one, too. Girl gargoyle, guy gargoyle. Pick a partner and practice passing, for if you pass proficiently, perhaps you'll play professionally.
Once upon a barren moor There dwelt a bear, also a boar. The bear could not bear the boar. The boar thought the bear a bore. At last the bear could bear no more Of that boar that bored him on the moor, And so one morn he bored the boar-That boar will bore the bear no more. If a Hottentot taught a Hottentot tot To talk ere the tot could totter, Ought the Hottenton tot Be taught to say aught, or naught, Or what ought to be taught her? If to hoot and to toot a Hottentot tot Be taught by her Hottentot tutor, Ought the tutor get hot If the Hottentot tot Hoot and toot at her Hottentot tutor? Will you, William? Mix, Miss Mix! Who washed Washington's white woolen underwear when Washington's washer woman went west? Two toads, totally tired. Freshly-fried flying fish. The sawingest saw I ever saw saw was the saw I saw saw in Arkansas. Just think, that sphinx has a sphincter that stinks! Strange strategic statistics.
Sarah sitting in her Chevrolet, All she does is sits and shifts, All she does is sits and shifts. Hi-Tech Traveling Tractor Trailor Truck Tracker Ned Nott was shot and Sam Shott was not. So it is better to be Shott than Nott. Some say Nott was not shot. But Shott says he shot Nott. Either the shot Shott shot at Nott was not shot, or Nott was shot. If the shot Shott shot shot Nott, Nott was shot. But if the shot Shott shot shot Shott, then Shott was shot, not Nott. However, the shot Shott shot shot not Shott -but Nott. Six slippery snails, slid slowly seaward. Three twigs twined tightly. There was a young fisher named Fischer Who fished for a fish in a fissure. The fish with a grin, Pulled the fisherman in; Now they're fishing the fissure for Fischer. Pretty Kitty Creighton had a cotton batten cat. The cotton batten cat was bitten by a rat.
253 Copyright 2004 - Marius Panzarella - All Rights Reserved
The kitten that was bitten had a button for an eye, And biting off the button made the cotton batten fly. Suddenly swerving, seven small swans Swam silently southward, Seeing six swift sailboats Sailing sedately seaward. The ochre ogre ogled the poker. If you stick a stock of liquor in your locker, It's slick to stick a lock upon your stock, Or some stickler who is slicker Will stick you of your liquor If you fail to lock your liquor With a lock! Shredded Swiss chesse. The soldiers shouldered shooters on their shoulders. Theophiles Thistle, the successful thistle-sifter, in sifting a sieve full of un-sifted thistles, thrust three thousand thistles through the thick of his thumb. Now.....if Theophiles Thistle, the successful thistlesifter, in sifting a sieve full of un-sifted thistles, thrust three thousand thistles through the thick of his thumb, see that thou, in sifting a sieve full of un-sifted thistles, thrust not three thousand thistles through the thick of thy thumb. Success to the successful thistle-sifter!
254 Copyright 2004 - Marius Panzarella - All Rights Reserved
Thank the other three brothers of their father's mother's brother's side. They both, though, have thirty-three thick thimbles to thaw. Irish wristwatch. Fred fed Ted bread, and Ted fed Fred bread. Cows graze in groves on grass which grows in grooves in groves. Brisk brave brigadiers brandished broad bright blades, blunderbusses, and bludgeons -- balancing them badly. Tragedy strategy. Selfish shellfish. They have left the thriftshop, and lost both their theatre tickets and the volume of valuable licenses and coupons for free theatrical frills and thrills.
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