1. Find two business letters and bring them to class.

Be prepared to identify
and comment on the various parts of a letter discussed in this chapter.
o Heading - Contains sender's address and date. Located at the top of the letter.
o Inside Address - Name and address of the recipient.
o Salutation - Greeting like "Dear Mr. Smith:". Followed by a colon.
o Body - The message of the letter. Organized into paragraphs.
o Complimentary Close - Sign off phrase like "Sincerely," aligned with the date and
sender's name.
o Signature - Handwritten or electronic signature of sender.
o Identification - Name and title of sender typed below signature.
o Enclosure Notation (optional) - Indicates attachments like "Enclosure" or "Encl."
2. Find a form letter that is addressed to “Dear Customer,” “Postal Patron,”
or “Dear Resident,” and rewrite it to make it more personal.

Original:

Dear Postal Patron,

Our records indicate that you have not voted in the last two elections. Voting is a vital
part of civic responsibility. We urge you to fulfill your duty by voting in the upcoming
primary and general elections.

Do not neglect this important obligation. Go to the polls and let your voice be heard.

Board of Elections

Revised Personalized Letter:

Dear Mr. Johnson,

Our records show you have not voted in the past couple elections. As a valued member of
our community, we would love to see you at the polls this season.
We know life gets busy, and it can be tempting to sit out an election. But we want to
remind you that your vote really does make a difference in choosing leaders who will
represent your interests.

You have a unique perspective that would benefit our community's decision-making. We
sincerely hope you will consider participating in this year's primary on August 2nd and
general election on November 8th.

If you have any questions about the voting process or need help getting to your polling
place, please don't hesitate to call me personally at 123-456-7890. I'm happy to help
ensure you can exercise your right to vote.

We look forward to seeing you at the polls soon!

Sincerely,

Donald Le

Board of Elections

3. Correct the following inside addresses:

a. Dr. Ann Clark, M.D. 1730 East Jefferson Jackson, MI. 46759
b. To: Miss Tommy Jones Secretary to Mrs. Franks Donlevey labs Cleveland, O.
45362
c. Debbie Hinkle 432 Parkway N. Y. C. 10054
d. Mr. Charles Howe, Acme Pro. P.O. Box 675 1234 S. e. Boulevard Gainesville,
Flor. 32601
e. Alex Goings, man. Pittfield Industries Longview, TEXAS 76450
f. ATTENTION: G. Yancy (Mrs.) Police Academy 1329 Tucker N. O., La.
3410–70122
g. David and Mahenny Lawyers Dobbs Build. L.A. 94756
h. Barry Fahwd Man., Peninsular, Ltd. Arabia
a. Dr. Ann Clark, M.D. Jackson, MI 46759
1730 East Jefferson
b. Tommy Jones
Secretary to Mrs. Franks f. Ms. G. Yancy
Donlevey Labs Police Academy
Cleveland, OH 45362 1329 Tucker
New Orleans, LA 70122-3410
c. Ms. Debbie Hinkle
432 Parkway g. Messrs. David and Mahenny
New York, NY 10054 Lawyers
Dobbs Building
d. Mr. Charles Howe Los Angeles, CA 94756
Acme Products
P.O. Box 675 h. Mr. Barry Fahwd, Manager
1234 S.E. Boulevard Peninsular, Ltd.
Gainesville, FL 32601 Arabia
e. Mr. Alex Goings, Manager
Pittfield Industries
Longview, TX 75650
 4. Write appropriate inside addresses and salutations to (a) a woman who
has not specified her marital status; (b) an officer in the armed forces; (c)
a professor at your school; (d) an assistant manager at your local bank; (e)
a member of the clergy; (f) a government worker.

a. Ms. Jane Doe d. Ms. Amy Lopez

123 Main Street Assistant Manager
Anytown, NY 12345 Local Bank
Dear Ms. Doe: 789 Bank Blvd.
Anytown, NY 12345
b. Captain John Smith Dear Ms. Lopez:
United States Army
123 Army Way e. Reverend Ann Black
Anytown, VA 12345 Local Church
Dear Captain Smith: 987 Church St.
Anytown, NY 12345
c. Professor Mary Johnson Dear Reverend Black:
Department of English
Local University f. Mr. Michael Brown
456 College Ave. United States Department of Agriculture
Anytown, NY 12345 1234 Government Way
Dear Professor Johnson: Washington, D.C. 20000
Dear Mr. Brown:

5. Rewrite the following sentences to make them more personal.

a. It becomes incumbent upon this office to cancel order #2394.

b. Management has suggested the curtailment of parking privileges.
c. ALL USERS OF HYDROPLEX: Desist from ordering replacement valves
during the period of Dec. 20–30.
d. The request for a new circuit board has been honored; it will be shipped to
same address soon.
e. Perseverance and attention to detail have made this writer important to
company in-house work.
f. The Director of Nurses hereby notifies staff that a general meeting will be
held Monday afternoon at 3:00 p.m. sharp. Attendance is mandatory.
g. Reports will be filed by appropriate personnel no later than the scheduled
plans allow.
Here are the rewritten sentences to make them more personal:
a. We regret that we must cancel your order #2394.
b. The company has recommended limiting parking privileges.
c. Please do not order any HYDROPLEX replacement valves between December 20-30.
d. We have shipped the new circuit board you requested, and it should arrive at your
address shortly.
e. Your dedication and attention to detail have made you a valued member of our team.
f. I am calling a mandatory staff meeting this Monday at 3:00 sharp. Please be sure to
attend.
g. Please submit your reports by the deadline indicated in the schedule.
6. The following sentences are discourteous, boastful, excessively humble,
vague, or lacking the “you attitude.” Rewrite them to correct those
mistakes.

a. Something is obviously wrong in your head office. They have once more sent
me the wrong model number. Can they ever get things straight?
b. My instructor wants me to do a term paper on safety regulations at a small
plant. Since you are the manager of a small plant, send me all the information I need
at once. My grade depends heavily on all this.
c. It is apparent that you are in business to rip off the public.
d. I was wondering if you could possibly see your way into sending me the local
chapter president’s name and address—if you have the time, that is.
e. I have waited for my confirmation for two weeks now. Do you expect me to
wait forever, or can I get some action?
a. There seems to be some confusion in your office about the model number I requested. I
would greatly appreciate it if you could please send me the correct model, number
568XX.
b. I am writing a paper for class on safety regulations in small manufacturing plants.
Your expertise as a plant manager would be invaluable. I would greatly appreciate any
information you could provide to help me understand the key safety issues.
c. I am concerned that there may have been a misunderstanding about your company's
services. I would welcome the opportunity to discuss this matter to resolve any issues.
d. If it is convenient, I would appreciate if you could please send me contact information
for the local chapter president. This information would be very helpful for a project I am
working on.
e. I am following up about the status of my confirmation. It has been two weeks, and I
want to make sure it was not overlooked. Please let me know if you need any additional
information from me. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

7. The following letter, filled with musty expressions and in old-fashioned

language (legal- ese), buries key ideas. Rewrite and reorganize it to make
it shorter, clearer, and more reader-centered.

Dear Ms. Granedi:

This is in response to your firm’s letter of recent date inquiring about the types of
ad- ditional services that may be available to business customers of the First
National Bank of Bentonville. The question of a possible time frame for the
implementation of said services was also raised in the aforementioned letter.
Pursuant to these queries, the following an- swers, this office trusts, will prove
helpful.
Please be advised that the Board of Directors at First National Bank has a
continuing repu- tation for servicing the needs of the Bentonville community,
especially the business com- munity. For the last fifty years—half of a century—
First National Bank has provided the funds necessary for the growth, success, and
expansion of many local firms, yours included. This financial support has bestowed
many opportunities on a multitude of business own- ers, residents of Bentonville,
and even residents of surrounding local communities.
The Board is at this present writing currently deliberating, with its characteristic
caution, over a variety of options suggested to us by our patrons, including your
firm. These op- tions, if the Board decides to act upon them, would enhance the
business opportunities for financial transactions at First National Bank. Among the
two options receiving attention by the Board at this point in time are the creation of
a branch office in the rapidly growing north side of Bentonville. This area has many
customers who rely on the services of First National Bank. The Board may also
place a business loan department in the new branch.
If this office of the First National Bank of Bentonville might be of further helpful as-
sistance, please advise. Remember, banking with First National Bank is a
community privilege.
Soundly yours,
M. T. Watkins
Public Relations Director
Dear Ms. Granedi:
Thank you for your recent letter asking about new services First National Bank may offer
business customers like yours. I'm happy to provide more information.
As you know, for 50 years First National Bank has helped Bentonville businesses like
yours grow and thrive. We take pride in understanding and meeting your financial needs.
Currently, our Board of Directors is exploring two options based on feedback from
valued customers such as yourself:

o Opening a branch in north Bentonville to serve that rapidly growing area. Many
current customers live in that vicinity.
o Adding a business loan department at the new branch location. This would provide
more convenient access to lending services.

I will keep you updated on the Board's decisions about expanding services. Please let me
know if you need any other information about First National Bank's offerings for your
business. We appreciate the opportunity to serve the Bentonville community.
Sincerely,
M.T. Watkins
Public Relations Director
The revised version is shorter, gets to the point more directly, uses "you" language, and
highlights the key information about potential new banking services relevant to the
reader. The tone is also more personal and less formal.

8. Either individually or in a small group, write a business letter to one of the

following indi- viduals and submit an appropriate envelope with your
letter.

a. your mayor, asking for an appointment and explaining why you need one
b. your college president, stressing the need for more parking spaces or for
additional databases at the library
c. the local water department, asking for information about fluoride
supplements
d. the editor of an online magazine, requesting permission to reprint an article
in your
e. company’s blog and stating why
f. the author of an article you have read recently, telling why you agree or
disagree
g. with the views presented
h. the director of food services on campus asking for more ethnic meals
i. a computer vendor, inquiring about costs and availability of a specific
software package; explain your company’s special needs
March 1, 20XX
Ms. Jane Smith
Account Manager
ABComp Software
123 Technology Lane
Silicon Valley, CA 98765
Dear Ms. Smith:
I am the IT manager for Acme Corporation, a manufacturing company based in Chicago.
We are interested in purchasing your company's Project Planning software suite to help
manage our operations more efficiently.
Currently, our project managers use a variety of spreadsheets and standalone systems that
do not communicate with each other. This leads to duplications of effort and makes it
difficult to get an overall view of project status. We believe your integrated software suite
would streamline our processes.
I would like to schedule an online demo of the features and capabilities of the Project
Planning suite. In addition, please provide me with pricing options for a company our
size. We have approximately 150 employees across three locations that would need
access.
As a manufacturer, we have some unique needs in terms of supply chain integration and
manufacturing resource planning. I would like to discuss how your software can be
customized for our industry and environment. Please let me know if you need any
additional information from me.
I look forward to learning more about how ABComp Software can meet our project
management requirements. Thank you for your time and consideration. I look forward to
your reply.
Sincerely,
Donald Le
IT Manager
Acme Corporation

9. Rewrite the following letters, making them appropriate for a reader whose
native lan- guage is not English. Identify the intended reader’s cultural
heritage. As you revise the letters, pay attention to the words,
measurements, and sentence constructions you em- ploy. Be sure to
consider the reader’s cultural traditions and avoid cultural insensitivity.

1. Dear Mr. Wong,

It’s not every day that you have the chance to get in on the ground floor of a deal so
good you can actually taste it. But Off-Wall Street Mutual can make the difference
in your financial future. Give me a moment to convince you.
By becoming a member of our international investing group for just under $250,
you can just about ensure your success. We know all the ins and outs of long-term
invest- ing and can save you a bundle. Our analysts are the hot shots of the business
and always look long and hard for the most propitious business deals. The stocks we
select with your interests in mind are as safe as a bank and not nearly so costly for
you. Unlike any of your undertrained local agents, we can save you money by
investing your money. We are penny pinchers with our clients’ initial investments,
but we are King Midas when it comes to transforming those investments into pure
gold.
I am enclosing a brochure for you to study, and I really hope you will examine it
care- fully. You would be foolish to let a deal like Off-Wall Street Mutual pass you
by. Go for it. Call me by 3:00 today.
Hurriedly,
2. Dear Mr. Bafaloukos,
My firm is taking a survey of businesses in your part of the world to see if there is
any likelihood of getting you on board our international computer network, and so I
thought I would see if you might like to take the chance. In today’s shaky world,
busi- ness events can change overnight and without the proper scoop you could be
left out in the cold. We can alleviate that mess.
Not only do we interface with major exchanges all around the globe, but we make
sure that we get the facts to you pronto. We do not sit on our hands here at Intertel.
Check out our website on who and how we serve and I have no doubts that you will
email or ring us up to find out about joining up.
One last point: Can you really risk going out on a limb without first knowing that
you have all the facts at your fingertips about worldwide business events? Intertel is
there to save you.
Fondly,
Letter 1 (revised for a Chinese reader):
Dear Mr. Wong:
I am writing to tell you about an investment opportunity from Off-Wall Street Mutual
that could benefit you. This group helps people invest their money wisely for the long-
term.
By joining for about $250, you can work with investment experts to choose stocks that
are low risk but have good potential to earn money over time. Off-Wall Street Mutual
analysts research investments thoroughly before recommending them.
This group can save you money on fees compared to other investment companies. They
carefully watch your initial investment and help it grow successfully.
I have enclosed a brochure that explains more about Off-Wall Street Mutual. Please look
it over and let me know if you would like to join by 3:00 today. I would be happy to
answer any questions.
Sincerely,
Letter 2 (revised for a Greek reader):
Dear Mr. Bafaloukos:
My company is surveying businesses internationally to see if they want to join our
computer network. I thought your company might be interested.
With our network, you can get business news from around the world very quickly. This
helps companies make smart decisions when markets change suddenly.
Please visit our website to learn more about the companies we work with globally. I think
you will want to contact me after you see how we can help your business get worldwide
data right away.
I would be very glad to provide more details if you might like to connect with our
network. Please let me know if you have any questions.
Sincerely,
The revised versions use shorter, simpler sentences, avoid idioms and slang, and have a
more neutral, less pushy tone. The words and phrasing are clearer and easier to
understand for non-native English speakers.

10. Interview a student at your school or a co-worker who was born and
raised in a non- English-speaking country about the proper etiquette in
 writing a business letter to someone from his or her country. Collaborate
with this individual to write a letter to an executive from that country—
for example, a sales letter or a letter asking for information.

Dear Mr. Nguyen,

It was a pleasure speaking with you about business letter writing etiquette in Vietnam.
Based on your recommendations, I have written this letter to introduce myself and my
company in a way that respects your cultural traditions.
Let me first express my hope that you and your family are happy and well. I understand
that in Vietnam, it is important to inquire about one's family before conducting business
discussions.
My name is Donald Le and I am the sales manager for ACME Corporation, a
manufacturing company in the United States. Our company makes high-quality machine
parts that we believe could benefit your operations at Nam Phong Industries. We have
been supplying parts to companies in Vietnam for over 10 years and have many satisfied
customers.
If you would be open to discussing your manufacturing needs, I would be honored to
schedule a video call at your convenience. Please let me know if morning or afternoon is
better for you. I am available most days.
As a gesture of our esteem, I have sent a small gift along with this letter. I understand that
exchanging gifts is an important custom in Vietnam when establishing new business
relationships.
I look forward to building a successful business partnership based on mutual trust and
understanding. Please contact me with any questions.
With respect,
Donald Le
Sales Manager
ACME Corporation
I incorporated your advice about showing respect for the reader's family, scheduling
flexibility, sending a gift, and building trust. Please let me know if you have any other
suggestions to improve business communications with your culture. I appreciate you
taking the time to help me.
 11. In a letter to your instructor, describe the kinds of adaptations you had to
make for the international reader you wrote to in Exercise 10.

Here are some of the key adaptations I made in my letter to respect Vietnamese business
culture:

 Used a formal salutation ("Dear Mr. Nguyen") to show respect

 Inquired about his family's wellbeing before discussing business, as family is very
important in Vietnam
 Emphasized building a relationship of trust and understanding, not just making a
sales pitch
 Offered flexibility for scheduling a video call at his convenience, since
Vietnamese culture values accommodate others
 Sent a small gift along with the letter to follow Vietnamese custom
 Used polite, formal wording and avoided idioms or colloquial phrases
 Structured sentences simply without complex grammar to ease understanding
 Explained my company's experience doing business in Vietnam to establish
credibility
 Suggested translating documents to Vietnamese to facilitate communication
 Signed with my full name and title to indicate my status and expertise
 Did not assume he would use my first name, even though I used his, due to
hierarchy

Making these careful adaptations required researching Vietnamese culture and business
norms. But it shows respect and will hopefully lead to a productive relationship.

12. Assume you work for a large international corporation that has just
opened a new office in one of the following cities:

a. Dar es Salaam, Tanzania

b. Istanbul, Turkey
c. Caracas, Venezuela
d. Manila, Philippines
e. Kiev, Ukraine
f. Beijing, China
g. Warsaw, Poland
h. Mexico City, Mexico
i. Amman, Jordan
j. Perth, Australia
k. Lagos, Nigeria
l. Prague, Czech Republic
Write a short report (one to two pages; see Chapter 14) on the main points of letter
etiquette that your boss will have to observe in communicating with the non-native
speaker of English who is the manager at the new office. In researching your report,
pay attention to such cultural differences such as those discussed in “Respecting
Readers’ Nationality and Ethnic/Racial Heritage” (pages 176–177).
To: CEO
From: Yen Nguyen, Cultural Affairs Specialist
Date: March 1, 20XX
Subject: Letter Etiquette for Vietnam Office
As we open our new branch in Hanoi, Vietnam, it is important that communications from
corporate headquarters follow proper Vietnamese business etiquette. Here are some key
points to keep in mind when writing letters to Mr. Tran, our office manager:
Salutations - Address him as "Mr. Tran" rather than his first name, even if you have met
him before. Vietnamese culture places high importance on hierarchy and respect for
authority.
Tone - Adopt a formal, polite, and respectful tone. Avoid colloquial expressions and any
language that could be perceived as impolite or confrontational.
Sentence Structure - Use short, clear sentences rather than long, complex ones. This will
make your letters easier to understand for non-native English speakers.
Paper - High-quality stationery and envelopes are expected for formal business
correspondence in Vietnam.
Avoid Idioms - Vietnamese culture has many idioms that do not translate literally into
English. So it is best to avoid using idioms and instead stick to simple, direct phrasing.
Gifts - Small gifts are customary when first establishing a relationship in Vietnam. You
may want to send a small item along with an introductory letter.
Meetings - If visiting Hanoi, schedule meetings well in advance and reconfirm a day
ahead. Punctuality is valued.
Translations - Offer to have any complex documents translated into Vietnamese to
facilitate communication and build trust.
Please let me know if you need any other guidance on communicating effectively with
our new Vietnam office. I am happy to help ensure we get off on the right foot.

13. As a collaborative project, team up with three other students in your class
to write sepa- rate letters tailored to executives in each of the following
cities:
a. Riyadh, Saudi Arabia
b. Tokyo, Japan
c. Munich, Germany
d. Nairobi, Kenya

Assume you are selling the same product or service to each reader, but adapt your
com- munication to the culture represented by the reader.
Turn in the four letters, and explain to your instructor in an accompanying memo
how you met the needs of those diverse cultural audiences in terms of style, tone,
level of content, format, and sales tactics. Describe the research tools you used to
find out about your reader’s particular culture (and communication protocols) and
how you benefited from using those tools.

 Split into groups of 4 students. Each student picks one of the cities/cultures to focus
on.
 Conduct research on business letter writing etiquette for your assigned culture. Good
resources include:
 Online articles, blogs, forums discussing that country's business culture
 Books on intercultural communication at the library
 Speaking with someone familiar with that culture
 Checking if your university has an international business center
 Draft a sales letter tailored specifically to an executive in your assigned city. Adapt
the content, style, tone, format, and sales tactics based on your research.
 Share drafts with your group members and get their feedback. Revise your letters
based on their suggestions.
 Submit the 4 final sales letters along with a memo explaining how you adapted each
one for the cultural audience. In the memo, discuss:
 What research sources you used and what you learned
 How you incorporated that knowledge into your letter (examples of wording, tone,
formatting, sales tactics, etc. that fit the culture)
 Benefits of researching the audience's culture before writing
 Anything you found challenging or wished you had known more about