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 C h ild ren 's P e rc e p tio n s o f P a ren ta l Roles
by

C h ristin e L essuck N am er

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A D octoral P ro ject S ubm itted in P artial F u lfillm en t o f th e R equirem ents

fo r th e D egree o f D octor o f Psychology in th e D e p artm en t o f P sychology
a t Pace U n iv e rsity

New Y ork
1997

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 UMI Number: 9816325

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UMI Microform 9816325

Copyright 1998, by UMI Com pany. All rights reserved.

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 b PACE
. • 111111 I UNIVERSITY PSYCHOLOGY DEPARTMENT
PSY.D. PROJECT
FINAL APPROVAL FORM

(Please type all information)

NAME : Christine Lessuck Namer

giTT*T.T? OF PROJECT* Children's Perceptions of Parental Roles

DOCTORAL PROJECT COMMITTEE:

PROJECT ADVISOR: Dr. Barbara A. Mowder

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(Name)

Professor of Psychology at Pace University

(Title) (Affiliation)

PROJECT CONSULTANT:
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Dr. Florence Denmark
(Name)
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Professor of Psychology at Pace University
(Title) (Affiliation)
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FINAL APPROVAL OF COMPLETED PROJECT:

I have read the final version of the doctoral project

and certify that it meets the relevant requirements for
the Psy.D. degree in School-Community Psychology.

rject s Signature )

.blhunu-o--\J\.
(Project Consultant's Signature) (Date

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 I would like to dedicate this doctoral project to m y m other

Lillian Patricia Sondej Lessuck

1928-1974

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Every d a y o f her life, she dem onstrated the importance of good
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parenting through love, humor and com m itm ent to her five children.
She will always be the source o f m y inspiration, and I will always
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miss her.
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 A cknow ledgm ents

I w o u ld lik e to acknow ledge th e follow ing p e rs o n s for th e ir

c o n trib u tio n to th is p ro jec t:
My a d v iso r, Dr. B arb ara M ow der, for h e r c o m m itm e n t to re se a rc h in th e
a re a o f p a re n ts a n d c h ild re n . I a m g ratefu l fo r h e r in sig h t, en co u rag e m en t,
a n d g u id an ce th ro u g h o u t th is p ro ject.
My c o n su lta n t, Dr. F lorence D enm ark, fo r h e r th o u g h tfu l suggestions

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re g a rd in g a sp e c ts o f th is re s e a rc h .
My h u sb a n d , M ichael, fo r his tim e an d p a tie n c e , a n d his p rid e a n d
su p p o rt o f m y w ork. IE
My sons, M atthew a n d Luke, fo r d e m o n stra tin g to me the im p o rtan c e o f

listen in g a n d c arin g . T h e ir in te re s t a n d e n th u sia sm th ro u g h o u t th is p ro je c t

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c o n sta n tly re m in d e d m e o f th e im p o rtan c e o f th is w ork.
Mr. F rank De S tefano, fo r w elcom ing m e in to th e G reenw ich Village
School, a n d en ab lin g m e to w ork w ith the stu d e n ts.
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S ister K ath le en M u rp h y , fo r taking a n in te r e s t in this p ro jec t, o fferin g

h e r in sig h tfu l im p re ssio n s, a n d en ab lin g m e to w ork w ith stu d e n ts a t th e

Stella M aris School.

D avid H azan, fo r his c re ativ e c o m p u ter ta le n ts, a n d his frien d sh ip .
Finally, all o f th e c h ild re n w ho p a rtic ip a te d in th is project. T h eir
e n th u sia sm m ad e th is p ro je c t en jo y ab le for all.

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 TABLE OF CONTENTS

Page

Acknowledgm ents............................................................................................................... ill

A bstract..................................................................................................................................vii
CHAPTER I In tro d u c tio n ..................................................................................1
T he P a re n ta l Role
How th e Role Evolves

The Im p o rta n c e o f E arly E xperience

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C ognitive D e v elo p m en tal T h eo ry
P a re n t Role C h a ra c te ris tic s

CHAPTER II
R esearch Q u estio n s IE
Review o f th e L iteratu re ............................................................. 16
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In tro d u c tio n
C h a ra c te ristic s o f th e P a re n ta l Role

Bonding
D iscipline
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Education
G eneral W elfare a n d P ro te ctio n

R esp o n siv ity a n d S e n sitiv ity

CHAPTER III M ethod............................................................................................56

Child R esponse P a re n tin g Q u estio n n aire (CRPQ)

P a rtic ip a n ts
In s tru m e n t
C o n cep tu alizatio n a n d D evelopm ent o f th e In stru m en t
P ro ced u re

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Page

CHAPTER IV Results............................................................................................67
Q ualitative a n d Q u antitative A nalyses
CHAPTER V Discussion..................................................................................... 73
References..........................................................................................................................82

Appendices.........................................................................................................................91
A: L etter to P aren ts o f th e G reenw ich V illage School

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B: L etter to P a ren ts o f th e S tella M aris P ro g ram
C: Child R esponse P arenting Q u e stio n n a ire (CRPQ)
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D: Responses to O pen Ended Q jiestion- Sam ple, Age 4

E: Responses fro m Boys a n d Girls in K in d e rg a rte n

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F: Responses from Boys a n d Girls in T h ird G rade
G: Responses fro m Boys a n d Girls in Sixth G rade
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List o f T ables

T able 1 F requencies fo r G ender, G rad e, a n d Age of C h ild re n

T able 2 P erce n tag e s o f C h ild re n 's R atings o f P a re n t Role C h a ra c te ristic s

fo r M others (M) a n d F a th e rs (F)

T able 3 Percentages o f C hildren's R esponses to O pen E nded Q uestions

Table 4 Frequencies o f C hildren’s R esponses b y G rade to O pen E nded

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Q uestion

Table 5 M ean F acto r Im portance S core T ow ards M o th er (M) a n d F a th e r

F ig u re 1
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(F) by G rade a n d G ender o f C h ild ren

D iscipline, P rotection, a n d R esp o n siv ity A cross G rades

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 A b s tra c t

P aren tin g m ay be c o n sid ered o n e o f th e m ost difficult task s th a t

h u m a n s h a v e to p erfo rm ; fo r p eo p le, u n lik e o th e r anim als a re n o t b o rn

know ing how to b e p a re n ts. W hile o th e r a n im a l species e x h ib it in stin c tiv e

p a re n tin g b e h av io rs, h um ans do n o t. T h e n e ce ssa ry skills a n d k n o w led g e fo r

p a re n tin g m u st b e acq u ired th ro u g h a p ro c e ss o f m odeling, e d u c a tio n , a n d

e x p erien c e. Yet, it h as long b e en a so c ie ta l belief th a t p a re n ts h a v e a n

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in h e r e n t u n d e rs ta n d in g of how to p a re n t, a n d th a t th ey w ill in s tin c tiv e ly

p e rfo rm as p a re n ts . Psychologists, e d u c a to rs , a n d p a re n ts th em selv es, o n ly

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re c e n tly h av e b e g u n to stu d y th e e d u c a tio n a n d psychological w ell-bein g o f

c h ild re n . T hus, th e overall grow th o f p a r e n t/c h ild re la tio n sh ip s, h o w th e

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p a re n t role develops, changes, a n d a d a p ts o v e r tim e, and th e com p lex ity

in v o lv ed in p a re n tin g is ju st now being a d d re ss e d .

In o rd e r to exam ine th e com p lex ities asso ciated w ith p a re n tin g ,

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re s e a rc h e rs o fte n view p are n tin g as a so c ial ro le th a t is to be p e rfo rm e d by

p a re n ts. A social ro le refers to a c a te g o ry o f p eople, a societal re la tio n sh ip , a n d
a set o f ex p ec ta tio n s o f how p eo p le in th e c ateg o ry should act. P a re n t Role
D evelopm ent T h eo ry (PRDT) has b een d e v e lo p e d to exam ine how th e p a re n t
ro le sh ifts a n d c h an g e s over tim e, a n d h a s id e n tifie d th e follow ing p a re n ta l

c h a ra c te ristic s: b o n d in g , d iscip lin e, e d u c a tio n , general w elfare a n d

p ro te c tio n , resp o n siv ity , a n d se n sitiv ity .

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 vii i
T he c u rre n t stu d y c o n trib u te s to o u r u n d e rs ta n d in g o f th e im p o rtan c e

a n d com plexities a ttrib u te d to th e p a re n t role fro m th e p e rsp ec tiv e o f th e

ch ild . Q uestions fo r in v estig atio n w ere:

1. Do c h ild re n acknow ledge th e im p o rta n t p a re n ta l c h a ra c te ristic s th a t
h a v e b e e n id e n tifie d fro m th e re s e a rc h lite ra tu re ?

2. Do c h ild re n view th e ro les o f m o th e rs a n d fa th e rs sim ilarly? Are

m o th e rs a n d fa th e rs eq u al p ro v id e rs o f p a re n ta l c h a ra c te ristic s to th e ir
c h ild re n ?
3. How a re g e n d er d ifferen ces in c h ild re n re fle c te d in th e ir re sp o n se s

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c o n ce rn in g im p o rta n c e o f p a re n ta l c h a ra c te ristic s? Do boys a n d girls d iffer
in w h a t th e y th in k p a re n ts do?
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4. Do c h ild re n p erceive p a rtic u la r c h a ra c te ristic s of p a re n tin g as
sh iftin g o v er tim e relativ e to th e ir ow n d e v elo p m e n tal stages? For exam ple, d o
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affectional needs, a n d needs to be p ro te c te d a n d c a re d fo r assum e lesser
im p o rtan ce, w hile aspects o f d iscipline, a n d /o r e d u c a tio n assum e g re a te r
im p o rta n c e w ith ch an g es in d ev elo p m en t?
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5. Do c h ild re n view th e c h a ra c te ristic s o f re sp o n siv ity a n d sen sitiv ity

(w hich en co m p ass p a re n t-c h ild c o m m u n ica tio n a n d e m p a th y ) as d ecrea sin g

o v e r tim e?
An a d a p ta tio n of th e P aren t Role Q u estio n n aire (PRO), a n in stru m e n t
d e sig n ed to assess p a re n ts' p e rc e p tio n s o f p a re n ta l c h a ra c te ristic s a t

c h ild re n 's d ev elo p m en tal levels was d ev elo p ed fo r u tiliz a tio n w ith c h ild ren .
This in stru m e n t, th e Child R esponse P arenting Q u estio n n aire (CRPQ), assesses

c h ild re n 's p e rc e p tio n s of th e im p o rta n c e o f p a re n ta l c h a ra c te ristic s a t th e ir

d iffe re n t d ev elo p m en tal ages. T he CRPQ em ploys v isual re fe re n ts to p o rtra y
p a re n ta l c h arac teristics, a n d is c o m p rised o f tw o p a rts. T he first p a r t asks th e

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 ix
ch ild to id e n tify his o r h e r age a n d g en d er a n d a n sw e r a n o p e n e n d e d q u estio n

a b o u t th e im p o rta n t th in g s p a re n ts do w ith th e ir c h ild re n . P art two displays

p h o to g ra p h s o f m o th e rs a n d fa th e rs in te ra c tin g w ith th e ir c h ild re n , a n d

p ro v id es d e fin itio n s o f p a re n ta l c h a ra c te ristic s th a t th e y p o rtra y . T he ch ild is

th e n a sk ed to ra te th e im p o rta n c e o f each p a re n ta l c h a ra c te ristic b a sed o n a

fo u r p o in t Likert ty p e scale ran g in g from v e ry im p o rta n t to n o t im p o rta n t.

S eventy c h ild ren , 35 boys a n d 35 girls in k in d e rg a rte n (ages 5,6), th ird

g rad e (ages 8,9), a n d sixth g rad e (ages 11,12) fro m a New York City Public
School w ere interview ed. R esults from th e o p e n e n d e d q u e stio n id en tifie d th e

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six p a re n ta l c h arac teristics, in a d d itio n to a n "o th er" categ o ry . T he "other"

categ o ry id en tifie d p la y a n d re c rea tio n a l a ctiv ity , a n d w as th e m ost

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fre q u e n tly re p o rte d c h a ra c te ristic cited by p a rtic ip a n ts , a t 76% across all age
levels. For th ird g rad e rs, th is was th e m ost im p o rta n t k in d o f p aren t-ch ild
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in te ra c tio n a t 33%. T he n e x t im p o rta n t p a re n ta l c h a ra c te ristic , educatio n ,

was cited b y c h ild ren acro ss all age levels a t 51% . T h e p a rtic ip a n ts found

m o th e rs to be sig n ifican tly m o re involved in c h ild re n 's e d u c a tio n th a n

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fath e rs, b u t th a t m o th e rs a n d fa th e rs w ere e q u a l p ro v id e rs o f th e rem ain in g

five p a re n ta l c h a rac teristics. G irls felt th a t e d u c a tio n w as m o re im p o rta n t

th a n boys. D iscipline w as th e lea st fre q u e n tly c ite d c h a ra c te ristic by both

boys a n d girls, b u t sig n ific an tly less so by boys th a n g irls.
In te rm s o f f u r th e r g e n d e r d ifferen c e s, g irls c ite d re s p o n siv ity as

sig n ific a n tly m o re im p o rta n t th a n boys. S e n sitiv ity in c re a s e d in im p o rta n c e

fo r girls o v e r tim e. B onding, as d e te rm in e d b y fre q u e n c y o f resp o n se s, was th e

o n ly c h a ra c te ristic to be c ite d m o re often by b o y s th a n girls.

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In re sp o n se to s ta n d a rd fo rm a t q u e stio n s, g e n e ra l p ro te c tio n a n d

w elfare was fo u n d to be "very im p o rtan t" fo r m o th e rs a t 91% , a n d fo r fa th e rs

a t 82% . C h ild re n in k in d e rg a rte n re p o rte d s ig n ific a n tly g re a te r im p o rta n c e o f
g e n e ra l w e lfa re a n d p ro te c tio n th a n d id six th g ra d e rs. T h e im p o rta n c e o f th is

c h a ra c te ristic w as fo u n d to shift, o r d e c re a se o v e r tim e. D iscipline w as th e

o n ly p a re n ta l c h arac teristic to be re p o rte d a s o n ly "som ew hat, o r n o t
im p o rta n t" a t a c o m p a rativ ely h ig h e r r a te th a n th e o th e r five p a re n tin g
c h a ra c te ris tic s .

R esults o f this stu d y c o n trib u te to o u r u n d e rs ta n d in g o f w hat good

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p a re n tin g is b y u n d e rs ta n d in g c h ild re n 's p e rc e p tio n s o f p a re n tin g a n d w h a t
c h ild re n b eliev e to be effective p a re n tin g . R esu lts p ro v id e a focus fo r fam ily
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assessm en t, b ro a d e n co m m u n icatio n a n d u n d e rs ta n d in g betw een p a re n ts a n d

c h ild re n , a n d h e lp ev alu ate fam ilies' stre n g th s a n d n eed s, as well as e sta b lish
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a p p ro p ria te in te rv e n tio n goals.
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C h a p te r I

A ccording to K arl M e n n in g er, "Being a p a re n t, w h e th e r f a th e r o r

m o th e r, is th e m ost d iffic u lt ta sk h u m an s h ave to p e rfo rm . People, u n lik e

o th e r anim als, are n o t b o rn know ing how to be p a re n ts. Most o f us stru g g le

th ro u g h " (Karl M enninger, c ite d in C arter & McGoldrick, 1989, p . 235).

M e n n in g e r refe rs to th e in s tin c tiv e p a re n tin g b e h a v io rs o b se rv e d in n o n ­

h u m a n anim als th a t a re n o t b eliev ed to be p re se n t in hum ans. H um ans m u st

a c q u ire th e n e ce ssa ry sk ills a n d know ledge fo r p a re n tin g th ro u g h th e p ro c e ss

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o f m odeling, e d u c a tio n a n d ex p erien ce. Yet, it has long b een th e so c ietal b e lief
th a t p a re n ts have a n in h e r e n t u n d e rs ta n d in g o f how to b e a p a re n t, a n d th a t
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th e y in stin ctiv ely p e rfo rm as p a re n ts. M owder (1995) w rites th a t o n e o f th e
d ifficu lties in w orking w ith p a re n ts is d u e , in p a rt, to th e overall a ssu m e d
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n a tu re of p aren tin g . H illary R odham C linton (1996, p. 69) w rites, "C h ild ren do
n o t co m e w ith in stru c tio n s." P aren tin g is su ch a p re v a le n t activ ity , w ith m o st
h av in g h a d a p a re n t, th a t m a n y m iss the com plexity o f th e p a re n t ro le a n d
re la te d p a re n tin g a ctiv itie s. T h ere is a n a ssu m p tio n th a t we know w h a t g o o d
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a n d p o o r p a re n tin g e n ta ils .
W ith reg ard s to p a re n tin g , B ro n fen b re n n er q u o te s G oethe, "W hat is th e

m o st difficult of all? T h a t w h ich seem s to you the easiest, to see w ith o n e 's

eyes w h at is lying b efo re"( G oethe, cited in Belsky, 1984, p. 92). T h erefo re,
p a re n tin g w hich h a s lo n g b e e n c o n sid e re d a n a tu ra l a n d sim ple p ro c e ss is
n o w being u n d e rsto o d in te rm s o f th e com plexities in h e re n t to th e p ro c e ss.
T h u s, th e overall g ro w th o f p a re n ts over tim e, a n d th e com plexities in v o lv e d
in p a re n tin g are ju s t n o w u n d e r in v estig atio n (G alinsky, 1987).

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F u rth e rm o re , th e c u rre n t social clim ate c o n trib u te s to th e ch allen g es
th a t p a re n ts fac e to d ay . Pugh (1984) m aintains th a t being a p a re n t in th e

second h a lf o f th is c e n tu ry is o fte n a lonely, difficu lt a n d d e m a n d in g

e x p erien c e. W hile h u m a n s h a v e b ro u g h t u p c h ild re n sin c e th e b e g in n in g o f

tim e, o ften u n d e r c o n d itio n s o f considerable h a rd sh ip , th e y h a v e n o t d o n e so

in th e iso la tio n o f to d a y 's n u c le a r fam ily. P arents face th e jo b o f ra isin g a

fam ily d u rin g th e ra p id technological, social a n d econom ic c h a n g e s th a t we
c u rr e n tly e x p e rie n c e .
G o rd o n b elieves th a t p a re n ts receive little tra in in g fo r th e ta sk o f

p are n th o o d , b u t a re b lam ed if th e ir children are n o t m o ld ed in to m odel

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citizens (D onnelly, 1992). W hile p a re n ts receive no special se t o f in stru c tio n s,
th ey a re o fte n h e ld re sp o n sib le fo r th e ir c h ild re n 's a c tio n s, p a rtic u la rly w h en
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th e a re n eg ativ e . C oncerning h is view of the p a re n t ro le G ordon (1 973)
w rites, " M illions o f new m o th e rs a n d fath ers take o n a job e ach y e a r th a t
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ran k s am ong th e m o st d iffic u lt th a t an y o n e can have, taking a n in fa n t, a little
p e rso n w ho is a lm o st to ta lly h elpless, assum ing full re sp o n sib ility fo r his
p h y sical a n d psych o lo g ical h e a lth a n d raising him to becom e a p ro d u c tiv e ,
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c o o p erative, a n d c o n trib u tin g citizen. W hat m ore d ifficu lt a n d d e m a n d in g job

is there?" ( p .l ) .
In o r d e r to ex am ine the com plex topic o f p a re n tin g , m an y
p sychologists, sociologists, a n d e d u cato rs view p a re n tin g fro m a social
learn in g th e o ry p o in t o f view. From this p erspective, th e social ro le s o f
p a re n t a n d c h ild a re key. In g en eral, a role is c h a ra c te riz e d b y a re la tio n sh ip ,

refers to a c a te g o ry o f p eople, a n d provides expectatio n s fo r how p e o p le in th e

category sh o u ld act (Shonkoff & Meisels, 1990). Papilia a n d O lds (1988) define a
social role as a set o f b eh av io ral expectations fo r p eo p le o f p a rtic u la r social
positions.

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M ore specifically, w h at is th e ro le o f a p a re n t? M owder (1991) d efin es a
p a re n t as a n in d iv id u a l w ho recognizes, a cc ep ts, a n d p erfo rm s th e p a re n ta l
role. T he p a re n t role re p re s e n ts how in d iv id u a ls a n d societies co n cep tu alize

th e p a r e n t p o rtio n o f a p a re n t-c h ild re la tio n sh ip a n d , d ep en d in g o n th e

c u ltu re , ty p ic ally in c o rp o ra te s th e e le m e n ts o f b o n d in g , discipline, e d u ca tio n ,

g e n eral w elfare a n d p ro te c tio n , resp o n siv ity , a n d sen sitiv ity (M owder, 1991).

A ch ild , o n th e o th e r h a n d is a n in d iv id u a l w ho is th e receiv er o f p a re n tin g in

a p a re n t-c h ild rela tio n sh ip (M ow der, 1991).

W hile m any p ro fe ssio n a ls view th e p a r e n t ro le as a social ro le w ith

im p licit so cietal o b ligations, p a re n ts th em selv es m ay co n sid er p a re n tin g to b e

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o n e o f life 's m ost rew ard in g , y e t ch allen g in g e x p erien c es. It is also a full tim e
jo b th a t re q u ire s know ledge, p a tie n c e a n d c o m m itm en t. W hether view ed as a
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role, e x p erien c e o r job, it is o n e th a t h isto ric a lly h a s re q u ire d no special skills
o r p ro fessio n al train in g . M ow der (1992) n o te s th a t being a p a re n t is seldom
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th o u g h t o f in term s o f a v e ry com plex social ro le, o r as a n equally com plex
re la te d se t o f expected activities. P aren tin g is a social ro le th at is in d iv id u ally
in te rp re te d (M owder, 1991). It is a n in d iv id u a l c re a tio n in th at p eople brin g to
th e ro le th e ir ow n p rio r e x p e rie n c e s fro m th e ir ow n p a re n t child re la tio n s.
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B razelton (1981) believes th a t learn in g to be a p a re n t is likely to be a com plex

p ro cess fo r m o st people. P a ren ts a re le a rn in g a b o u t them selves as th e y le a rn

a b o u t th e ir ch ild ren . T he ro le is a d e m a n d in g o n e a n d req u ires a k in d of

d e d ic a tio n fo r w hich we h av e a lre a d y b e e n sh a p e d b y o u r own p a st

e x p erien c es o f being m o th e re d o r fa th e re d .
Yet, th e re a re several w ays th a t p a re n ts evolve, develop a n d re d e fin e
th e p a r e n t role: T hey d ev elo p a n a w aren ess o f p a re n tin g practices in
p rev io u s tim es, th ey u n d e rs ta n d th e im p o rta n c e o f e a rly childhood

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e x p e rie n c e s, a n d fin ally , th e y re ly o n a d v ice a n d books fro m c h ild c a re

p ro fe ssio n a ls.
P a ren t E ffectiveness T rain in g ( PET), a c o u rse d e sig n e d b y G o rd o n in

1962, w as in itially m e a n t to h e lp p a re n ts w ho w e re hav in g d iffic u lty w ith

th e ir c h ild re n (D onnelly, 1992). T his c o u rse la te r e x p an d e d to p ro v id e

p re v e n ta tiv e tra in in g fo r p a re n ts b e fo re th e d iffic u ltie s b e g an . W hile G o rd o n

(1 9 7 3 ) believes p a re n ts re ly a lm o st u n iv e rsa lly o n th e sam e m e th o d s o f raisin g

c h ild re n u sed by th e ir p a re n ts a n d g ra n d p a re n ts , h e feels th a t w ith a sp ecial

ty p e o f tra in in g , p a re n ts can im p ro v e th e ir effe ctiv en e ss. A bove all, G o rd o n

em p h a size s th at p a re n ts m u st b e ta u g h t to a c c e p t, a n d co m m u n ica te w ith th e ir

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c h ild re n . W hen p a re n ts d e m o n s tra te a feeling o f a cc ep tan c e to w a rd th e ir

c h ild r e n , th is feeling c a n be in flu e n tia l in th e c h ild re n 's le a rn in g to a c c e p t

th em selv es (D onnelly, 1992).

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"A Job For Life" (Pugh, G., Kidd, J. & T orkington, K. 1982 ) a p a re n t
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e d u c a tio n m anual, focuses o n th e life cycle a p p ro a c h to p a re n t e d u c a tio n . It

n o te s th a t to d ay 's p a re n ts a re m o re a cu te ly a w are th a n th e ir ow n p a re n ts a n d
g r a n d p a re n ts of th e c ru c ia l ro le th a t th e y will p la y in th e ir c h ild re n 's

d e v e lo p m e n t. T hey a re also c o g n iz an t o f th e h ig h e x p ectatio n s th a t society

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p laces o n th em to do th e ir jo b well (Pugh, 1984). P arents m u st be ab le to fulfill

th e ir e d u c a tio n a l ro le in face o f o fte n c o n flic tin g ad v ice fro m c h ild c a re

e x p e rts a n d p ro fessio n als. T h ere fo re , th e re is a n e e d fo r a c tiv itie s o fferin g

p a re n ts p re p a ra tio n , e d u c a tio n , a n d s u p p o rt so th a t th e y m ay c o n tin u e to

b rin g u p th e ir c h ild re n w ith g r e a te r se lf-c o n fid e n c e , in c re a s e d k n o w led g e,

u n d e rs ta n d in g a n d e n jo y m e n t (Pugh, 1984).

T he im p o rtan c e o f e a rly ex p erien c e h a s b eco m e a n e sse n tia l a sp e c t in

u n d e rs ta n d in g c h ild d e v e lo p m e n t w ith in th e fram e w o rk o f p a re n t-c h ild

re la tio n s. Early c h ild h o o d ex p erien c es a n d th e social c lim ate o f th e fam ily,

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in c lu d in g values, a ttitu d e s , a n d b eh av io ral styles, h a v e b e en id e n tifie d as

im p o rta n t c o n trib u to rs to a c h ild 's d evelopm ent (B ro n fen b re n n er, 1974; H unt,

1961; R utter, 1985, Shonkoff & Meisels, 1990). W hat we do early in life lays th e
fo u n d a tio n fo r all th e re s t. T h e e a rly y ears c a n p ro v id e a basis fo r a long,

h e a lth y life-sp an (S h onkoff & M eisels, 1990).

T h e im p o rta n c e o f e a r ly exp erien ce w as s tre sse d by F reu d ian

p sy c h o a n a ly tic th e o ry a t th e sam e tim e th a t b e h a v io rism w as sw eeping th e

c o u n try (B ettleheim , 1987). P sychoanalytic th e o ry stre sse s b o th th e

in tra c ta b ility o f m u ch o f o u r e v o lu tio n a ry in h e rita n c e a n d th e im p o rta n c e o f

e a rly ex p erien ces. T h o u g h w e a r e u n a b le to a lte r a n y o f th is in h e rita n c e ,

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e a rly ex p erien ces m odify th e w ay th e y fin d e x p re ssio n in a n in d iv id u a l's
p e rso n a lity . Psychoanalysis a d d s to th e th e o ry o f e v o lu tio n th e id e a th a t ju s t as
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th e e m b ry o in th e m o th e r's w om b re p e a ts in it's g ro w th c e rta in stag es in
an im al evolution, so do th e in fa n t a n d sm all child re c a p itu la te th e im p o rta n t
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stag es o f th e h isto ry o f m a n k in d (B ettelheim ,1987). How in h e rite d

c h a ra c te ristic s will be s h a p e d d e p e n d on a p e rs o n 's life ex p erien ces. A nalytic

in sig h ts in to th e sig n ific a n c e o f th e in n e r life of c h ild re n h av e s p a rk e d a
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v irtu a l explosion in to th e sy ste m atic study o f ch ild h o o d (G alinsky,1987).

T h e im p o rtan c e o f b e in g ra ise d well h a s b e en ex am in e d by n u m e ro u s

c h ild specialists. B ettelheim (1 9 8 7 ) w rites th a t a p e rs o n w ho h a s b e e n raised

w ell p o ssesses a n in n e r life w h ic h is ric h a n d re w a rd in g , a n d w ith w h ic h sh e

o r h e is satisfied. Having b e e n ra ise d well e n h a n c e s o n e 's a b ility to c o p e w ith

th e m a n y h a rd sh ip s, a n d th e se rio u s d ifficulties sh e o r h e is likely to

e n c o u n te r in life, p rim a rily b e c a u se o f feelings o f s e c u rity a n d self-w o rth .
G row ing up in a fam ily w ith g o o d in tim ate re la tio n sh ip s b etw een p a re n ts a n d

c h ild re n fo sters o n e 's a b ility to fo rm lasting, satisfy in g , in tim a te re la tio n s to

o th e rs , w hich th u s gives m e a n in g to th e ir lives (B ettleheim , 1987).

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Spock (1 9 8 8 ) w rites th a t feelings o f love a n d tru s t fo rm th e fo u n d atio n

o f a ll th e c h ild ’s fu tu re d evelopm ent a n d fu tu re re la tio n sh ip s. F raiberg (1959)

n o te s th a t lo n g b e fo re th e ch ild d e v e lo p s his in n e r re s o u rc e s fo r overcom ing

d a n g ers, h e is d e p e n d e n t u p o n his p a re n ts to satisfy his n e e d s, to reliev e him

o f ten sio n , to a n tic ip a te d a n g er a n d to rem ove th e so u rce o f d istu rb an c e.

A tta c h m e n t a n d p a re n tin g a re n o t sim p le m a tters o f carin g , b u t a re also

p ro cesses o f le a rn in g how to d eal w ith a n g e r, fru s tra tio n a n d th e w ish to

escape th e ro le (B razelton, 1981).

T h e w ay s in w hich p a re n ts ra is e th e ir c h ild re n p o w e rfu lly in flu e n ce

how c h ild re n dev elo p a n d who th e y becom e. It is u n d e rs ta n d a b le th e n th a t

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p a re n ts seek th e a d v ice o f experts, p a rtic u la rly w hen th e y c a n n o t d e c ip h e r
th e m ea n in g o f th e ir ch ild 's b e h a v io r o r th e y a re an x io u s a b o u t h is o r h e r
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fu tu re . D u rin g th e p a s t few d ecad es p a re n ts have in c re asin g ly so u g h t an d

com e to tr u s t th e advice provided by c h ild rearin g books a n d articles

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(B ettelh eim ,1 9 8 7 ). Spock has o b se rv ed w om en's g re a te r w illingness to take

advice fro m p ro fessio n als as on e o f th e basic differences betw een th e sexes

(Eyer, 1992). G oldberg (1983) notes th a t w hen p rofessionals w hisk th e baby

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aw ay in th e d e liv e ry room , th e y c o n v ey to th e p a re n ts th a t th ey
(p ro fessio n als) a re co m p e te n t to c a re fo r th e baby, w h e rea s th e p a re n ts are

n o t. M uch o f th e tra d itio n a l h o sp ita l sy ste m fo r n e w b o rn c a re c a rrie s th is

m essage. F u rth e rm o re , w hen p a re n ts a d h e re to e x p erts a d v ic e th e re is a n ear-

u n iv e rsa l b ia s in o u r society tow ard th e id e a th a t th e re is o n ly o n e rig h t way

to d o so m eth in g , w hile all o th ers a re w rong (B ettelheim ,1987). C onsequently,

p a re n ts feel o b lig a te d to use th e c o rre c t a p p ro a ch . W hile th e o rie s o n child

re a rin g a n d p ro fe ssio n a l advice a re h e lp fu l, p a re n ts m u s t re m a in objective,

a n d n o t a d h e re rig id ly to one a p p ro a c h . T hey m ay allow them selves to be

g u id e d by view s th a t fit in to th e ir life sty les a n d s u p p o rt th e ir view s o n

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h e a lth y c h ild rea rin g . For exam ple, a p a re n t w ho h as b e e n a d v ised to place
h e r in f a n t o n a rig id feeding sc h e d u le , w hile sh e h e rs e lf is u n c o m fo rta b le
w ith rig id sch ed u les, m ay choose to d o w h at is m ore re a listic fo r h e r as a
p a re n t. By ch o o sin g m ore flexibility, sh e can re s p o n d im m e d ia te ly to th e
in f a n t's n e e d s, w hich in tu rn m ay r e s u lt in a h a p p ie r m o re fulfilling
i n f a n t /p a r e n t re la tio n sh ip . T h e re fo re , w hile e x p e rt a d v ic e m a y be

in c o rp o ra te d in to th e decision m aking pro cess o f p a re n tin g , p a re n ts m u st

o fte n re ly o n th e ir own sense o f w h a t effective p a re n tin g m ea n s to them .
G alinsky (1987) w rites th a t th ro u g h o u t h isto ry , p a re n th o o d has been a
p e rs o n a l saga o f im ages failed a n d ach iev ed . It is a h is to ry o f passing th ro u g h

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stag es, led b y o u r c h ild ren 's grow th. O ver th re e h u n d re d y e a rs ago ch ild ren
w ere se e n a s m in ia tu re ad u lts, sm aller, b u t n o t th a t d iffe re n t (Galinsky, 1987)).
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Je an Ja c q u e s Rousseau was th e first to in tro d u c e o u r m o d e rn n o tio n of
ch ild h o o d (Elkind, 1988). He c riticized e d u catio n al m eth o d s fo r presenting
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m a te ria ls fro m a n a d u lt p ersp ectiv e, reflectin g a d u lt v alu es a n d in terests.

R ousseau w rote, "C hildhood has it's ow n w ay o f seeing, th in k in g a n d feeling,

a n d n o th in g is m ore foolish th a n to try to su b stitu te o u rs fo r theirs." (Elkind,
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1988, P.4).
K ennell (1980) w ho h as b e en c re d ite d w ith Klaus fo r developing th e
th e o ry o f m a te rn a l in fan t bonding in th e 1970's w rites, "Are we in th e m idst
o f a rev o lu tio n ?" refe rrin g to c u r r e n t ra d ic ally a d v a n c e d m e th o d s o f ch ild

re a rin g . K ennell w rites th a t fo r m illio n s o f y e a rs h u m a n s h a v e w atch ed a n d

stu d ie d th e sta rs move across th e h eavens, apples fall fro m trees, a n d w ood
b u m . O ver a sim ilar sp an o f tim e, h u m a n beings h a v e o b se rv ed the b irth of
b ab ies a n d th e ir n u rsin g a n d n u rtu r in g u n til th e y w ere re a d y to lead
in d e p e n d e n t lives. Yet, K ennell asks if fac to rs a ffectin g h u m a n d e v elo p m en t
h av e re c e iv e d th e scru tin y , in v e stig a tio n a n d e v a lu a tio n th a t h as b een

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d ire c te d to th e stars a n d p la n e ts a n d p rinciples o f c h e m istry , p h y sics a n d
m a th e m a tic s. Kennell n o te s t h a t th e r e have b een a n a c c e le ra te d n u m b e r o f
p o w e rfu l in flu e n ce s o n c h ild re a r in g p rac tic es, w h ile th e r e h a s b e e n a
sh iftin g a n d ch an g in g o f c h ild re a rin g th e o rie s fro m re s tric tiv e a n d a d u lt
o rie n te d , to child c e n te re d a n d m o re perm issive.

An exam ple o f a p o w e rfu l p a re n tin g in flu e n c e w as th e th e o ry of

b e h av io rist Jo h n W atson in th e la te 1920's. B ettelheim (1 987) w rites th a t the

b e lief th a t all is possible, p ro v id e d o n e applies th e c o rre c t scien tific m ethods,
fo u n d it’s expression in te n e ts o f W atson's b eh av io rism . W atson b elieved in th e
" ta b u la rasa ", a co n cep t d e v e lo p e d in th e six teen th c e n tu ry b y p h ilo so p h er

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Jo h n Locke. Locke sp o k e o f th e c h ild as a b lank sla te u p o n w h ich life
e x p erien c e is w ritten . W atson a d v o c a te d a rig id a p p ro a c h to c h ild rea rin g a n d
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a d v ised p a re n ts to im p o se s tric t sch ed u les on th e ir c h ild re n fo r feeding,
to iletin g a n d alm ost e v ery o th e r activity, including loving. He a d v ise d m o th ers
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n o t to kiss th e ir c h ild re n b e c a u se kissing in te rfe re s w ith th e g la n d u la r system
(K ennell, 1980). He a d v ise d n e v e r to hug c h ild ren o r le t th e m sit in y o u r lap.

W atson b elieved th a t d e p e n d in g o n th e co n d itio n in g to w hich a ch ild was

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su b je cted in his early y e a rs, h e c o u ld be tu rn e d in to a n y ty p e o f rad ically

d iffe re n t p e rso n .
In c o n tra st, Piaget v iew ed th e c h ild 's in te lle c tu a l d e v e lo p m e n t as p a rt of
th e ongoing larger p ro cess o f b iological a d a p ta tio n (E lkind, 1985). Piaget's

(1936, 1952) account o f d e v e lo p m e n t relies up o n th e active processes of

a ssim ilatio n an d acco m m o d atio n ; th e developm ental m o d ificatio n s o f
s tru c tu re s a lre a d y p re s e n t c o m e a b o u t th ro u g h a c tiv e o rg a n ism -e n v iro n m e n t
in te ra c tio n s (A insw orth, 1 9 6 9 ). P iag et's in te re s t in h o w c h ild re n c o m p re h e n d

th e w o rld led to his b elief th a t know ledge is a p ro ce ss r a th e r th a n a state

(M iller, 1989; S antrock & Y ussen, 1989). Piaget th e o riz e d th a t cognitive grow th

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is m u c h lik e e m b ry o lo g ical gro w th ; an o rg a n iz e d s tru c tu re becom es m o re a n d

m o re d iffe re n tia te d o v e r tim e. C ognitive d e v elo p m e n tal th e o ry em p h a size s th e

d e v elo p in g c h ild 's ra tio n a l th in k in g a n d sta g es o f th o u g h t. T h o u g h ts a re th e

c e n tra l fo cu s o f d e v e lo p m e n t, th e p rim a ry d e te rm in a n ts o f c h ild re n 's a c tio n s.
In te llig e n ce is view ed as a d a p ta tio n to th e e n v iro n m e n t. T h e re fo re ,

e n v iro n m e n ta l e x p e rie n c e s fro m P iaget's p e rsp e c tiv e a re th e fo o d fo r

c h ild re n 's c o g n itiv e m a c h in e ry (M iller, 1989).

C ognitive d e v e lo p m e n ta l th e o ry p ro ce ed s th ro u g h a se ries o f stages.

Piaget e m p h a siz e d th a t co g n itiv e ch an g es in c h ild re n 's d e v e lo p m e n t c a n b e

e x p la in e d b y th e process o f a d a p ta tio n a n d its two subtypes: assim ilatio n a n d

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acco m m o d atio n , a n d o rg a n iz a tio n a n d e q u ilib ra tio n (S antrock & Yussen, 1989).
A c h ild 's e ffectiv e in te r a c tio n w ith th e e n v iro n m e n t is c a lle d
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a d a p ta tio n . T his in te ra c tio n is a cognitive o n e as it involves th e c h ild 's u se o f
th in k in g skills. A d a p tatio n is d iv id e d in to assim ilatio n a n d acco m m o d atio n
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w hich o c c u r to g e th e r. In a ssim ila tio n , th e c h ild trie s to in c o rp o ra te fe a tu re s
o f th e e n v iro n m e n t in to a lre a d y existing w ays o f th in k in g a b o u t th em . In

acc o m m o d atio n , a c h ild in c o rp o ra te s new fe a tu re s o f th e e n v iro n m e n t in to h is

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o r h e r th in k in g b y slig h tly m o d ify in g existing m o d es o f th o u g h t (S a n tro c k &

Yussen, 1989).
C ognitive o rg a n iz a tio n re fe rs to th e te n d e n c y fo r th o u g h t to c o n sist o f

system s w hose p a rts a re in te g ra te d to fo rm a w hole. Iso lated b e h a v io rs o r

th o u g h ts a re g ro u p e d in to a h ig h e r-o rd e r, sm o o th e r fu n c tio n in g sy stem .
E q u ilib ratio n ex p lain s how a c h ild shifts fro m o n e stage to th e n e x t. T he goal
o f o rg a n iz a tio n is to re a c h a m o re lasting sta te o f b a lan ce a n d th o u g h t. B efore

a n ew stag e o f th o u g h t c a n b e re a c h e d , th e c h ild m u st face th e in a d e q u a c y o f

th e c u r r e n t o n e . T he c h ild w ill e x p e rie n c e c o g n itiv e co n flict, o r u n c e r ta in ty

a n d th e re fo re e x p e rie n c e e q u ilib ra tio n .

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In th e L ockean fo rm u la tio n , th e c h ild is c o n stru e d in p h y sic a l ra th e r
th a n biological te rm s (Elkind, 1985). T he c h ild is seen as raw m a te ria l to be

m olded a n d sh a p e d by p a re n ts, e d u c a to rs a n d social in stitu tio n s. Elkind views

th ese c o n tra stin g p rin cip le s as m e ta p h o rs fo r childhood th a t w e h av e
trad itio n ally em p lo y ed (Elkind, 1985). T hese two m etaphors a re th e child as a
grow ing o rg an ism w ith it's ow n e m e rg e n t id e n tity , versu s th e c h ild as

m alleab le m a te ria l aw aiting im p rin tin g .

T herefore, in o rd e r to u n d e rs ta n d c h ild re n w ithin th e c o n te x t o f
p a ren tin g , p a st a n d p resen t, it is im p o rta n t to u n d e rsta n d th e m an y aspects of
th e p a re n t role. T hose w ho becom e p a re n ts create, as well as re s p o n d to, and

W
m odify th e role (D onnelly, 1992). W hile p a rt o f this role is in d iv id u a lly
created , a n o th e r p a r t is im posed b y social norm s th a t have a lre a d y been
IE
e sta b lish e d by th e c u ltu re w ith in w h ic h o n e lives. In c u rr e n t so c iety th e re

a re e x te rn a l fo rces as well im p o sin g ru le s in reg a rd to p a re n tin g , th a t are

EV
m an d a te d to p ro te c t the h e a lth , w elfare a n d rights of c h ild re n .
C hild fo cu sed p ro fessio n als, as w ell as the g eneral p u b lic , o fte n reg a rd
th e p a re n t role as som ething a b o u t w h ich th e re is consensus (M ow der, 1991).
PR

P reviously c ite d ex am p les h a v e b e e n a b o u t how p a re n ts le a rn c h ild -re a rin g

practices from th e c u rre n t lite ra tu re a n d c h ild specialists. G o rd o n (1973)
believes th a t p a re n ts rely alm o st u n iv e rs a lly on th e sam e m e th o d s o f raising
c h ild re n a n d d e a lin g w ith p ro b le m s in th e ir fam ilies th a t w ere u se d b y th e ir
p a re n ts a n d g ra n d p a re n ts. Spock (1 9 8 8 ) believes th a t y o u n g c h ild re n lea rn to

be p a re n ts th ro u g h th e process o f m o d elin g a n d im itation. A sm all boy im itates

h is fa th e r's a c tio n s a n d m a n n e rism s, to n e o f voice a n d p h ra s e s . A girl learn s
to be w om an a n d m o th e r by w atch in g a n d m odeling th e b e h a v io r o f h e r own

m o th er. Ideas a n d th o u g h ts a b o u t p a re n tin g a n d w hat it m e a n s b eg in w hen

one is v e ry y o ung (D onnelly, 1992). E lkind (1976) explains th a t pre-school

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