The Last Airbender
(2010)
I can recall sitting in the car with my friend Tiffany, who was a huge fan of the animated show Avatar and asking her, So James Cameron is directing this anime film? and hearing her sigh, and explain that there were two movies named Avatar, and that Camerons clout would ensure that the other guys would have to change their title. Which wasnt fair as the cartoon predated Camerons work, but thats Hollywood. I was supposed to go see the movie with Tiffany, but she had gone first through impatience, and when we discussed it she sort of naysayed me. I figured if a fan of the source material didnt like it, I would be better off staying away (though this logic does not always follow). However, against Tiffanys better judgement, I finally got around to seeing this movie, which, despite her warning and general bad word-of-mouth, I was interested in because the trailer was neat. Youll see this movie placing on, if not topping off, most worst movies of 2010 lists, and I can assure you that those people are being kind. Last Airbender isnt just a bad film, its so bad that it could easily be the worst film of several years (and possibly the decade, but there were some pretty damn bad films out in the last ten years). I knew I was in trouble when I read directed by M. Night Shamalamadingdong, a man who has no business directing any film, let alone a fantasy action movie. It would seem another problem was trying to condense an entire season of television plots into an hour and a half, or trying to find people who could act, or having a decent script, or anything. The story roughly follows that there are villages in a mythical land sort of based around the four elements, and that the Fire people are getting all uppity and have started taking things over. Theyve just about wiped out the Air people, but they missed one kid who somehow went into hibernation or something for a hundred years, and now hes the last of the Air people who can bend (manipulate the elemental forces of) air, hence the clunky title. But this kid is also slated to become some sort of super-elemental wizard who will be able to work all four elements (which makes sense, not only because fantasy stories need a savior figure but because you want to show off all that hard work designing the other elemental villages). Unfortunately, the story unspools in the worst way imaginable, in that our young Avatar is discovered by two highly annoying kids, and so we have to travel around Elementville with three kids whom we can barely tolerate (and whose acting makes the kids in Narnia look competent). Added to the fact that the main villain is played by Dev Patel you know, the dude from Slumdog Millionaireexactly whom you think of when you think menacing evil and, well, you get a mess. But not just any mess. Almost all of the dialogue is used to tell you the story rather than show you whats going on (many conversations begin with, Ive enjoyed our time together these last few days/weeks/months), and rarely do they ascend above the level of poorly structured exposition. Thats not dialogue, thats two-part voiceover, and whatever it is, it doesnt work. Its really hard to like badly acted child characters, and even harder when they talk like they are reading from a Cliff
Notes synopsis of the story. The adults all have the same problem too, with the result that you can never really parse just what in the hell is going on even though everyone is very busy explaining it to you, mostly because there are NO characters in this movie, only Greek Chorus mouthpieces who step to center screen now and again. But wait, theres more. While the movie is visually interesting (there is some nice production design), thats about the only positive thing I can say, period. The bending looks like nothing so much as kids doing tai chi (tai chi saves the world?), and we get plotholes big enough to drive the monster-sized ships the Fire village soldiers use to attack the WATER village. Somehow I think if I were attacking people who could manipulate water, I would use anything other than a boat to do it. But, well, I think about things like plot and character and how it should all have to make sense, and obviously no one involved with this production did at any point in the year and a half or so they spent making the movie. You get the point. This is an atrociously bad film. Its not bad on the level of Shoot em Up as it doesnt actively make you angry (unless you paid for it or were a fan of the animated show), but it is a colossal waste of your time, which these days is a large enough sin. At all costs you should avoid this movie; its a shining example of how to make a movie badly in every single way. Dont let your curiosity get the better of you as I did. December 27, 2010
