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Dark Psychology:
Master The Secret Techniques of Manipulation
Covert Emotional, Sneaky Persuasion and
Control Mental

Por S.L. Moore

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INDEX
Part I: Understanding How the Human Mind Works

Chapter 1: The Psychology of Persuasion

Chapter 2: Masters of Persuasion and Emotional Manipulation

Part II: Methods and Techniques

Chapter 3: How to Implement Persuasion Techniques
Chapter 4: Defending Yourself Against Manipulators
Conclusion
References

© Copyright 2018 by SL Moore – All rights reserved.

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Part I: Understanding How the Human Mind Works

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Introduction
In our world today, persuasion has become established in almost every aspect of our lives. We see it in brightly
colored advertisements, in emotionally charged political speeches and even in communication with friends and
family. At first, we may not even have been aware that persuasion was being used, but through studying
and understanding persuasion, thus becoming better equipped, we are unlikely to fall victim to it and may even
use its techniques. for our improvement. To begin to understand persuasion, we must first define it. Persuasion
is the ability of a communicator (eg, advertising, politician) to convince a listener to change their behavior or beliefs
on a given topic.

The communicator uses different tactics that appeal to the listener's emotions, which in turn manipulates the
listener's way of thinking. The important thing to understand about persuasion is that it is not a form of mind
control, but a form of mind manipulation. Persuasion shapes and molds the other's mind to fit the communicator's
agenda. The agenda can be something as simple as borrowing a friend's car to something as complex as
running for political office. Whatever the purpose, persuasion is a talent that can be easily learned and achieved.

To better understand persuasion, we must look at its history. The study of persuasive speech began more than
two thousand years ago with the ancient Greek philosophers. Philosophers studied how politicians and speakers
used various approaches to communicate their stance on a specific issue very effectively.

The philosopher Aristotle at the time divided these techniques into three observable categories: ethos, logos
and pathos. He defined ethos as the credibility of the speaker. He noticed that audiences were more accepting of
a speaker's message if the speaker presented himself as an expert on the topic and if he also presented himself
with confidence. If the speaker showed any signs of weakness (nervousness, hesitation, stuttering), the
audience would ignore the message. This is an important tactic in persuasion because people tend to
respect those who show tenacity and resolve in their lives.

The next observable technique is logo, which means logic. Aristotle discovered that strongly persuasive
speeches needed an element of logical reasoning. Logical reasoning makes the audience think that they have
reached a conclusion on their own, and not through the prodding of the speaker on stage.

The last observable technique is called pathos. Aristotle defined pathos as the emotional resources used to
obtain the desired result from the audience. He realized that persuasion was an effective technique only if the
audience was in the right emotional state. The audience would then be more susceptible to the message.

These techniques laid the foundation for our modern forms of persuasion.

To clarify, persuasion is not a way to gain control over another person, but rather to shape that person's way of
thinking. A modern example of this can be found in the many advertisements we face every day. We can't
escape their catchy slogans, bright colors, and celebrity-endorsed products. We, as consumers, know that
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Ads are there to sell products, but we rarely stop and discuss how their tactics are slowly changing the way
we think.

For example, think about the last commercial you mindlessly watched the last few episodes of your
favorite trashy TV show. The ads, at first, sound like background noise as you silently contemplate yourself
paying more each month for an ad-free stream. Slowly, he sees himself watching commercials. Before
that point, he had no need for anything they were selling, but now the appetizing images of tacos or burgers
make him feel hungry, needy. You may not have been hungry before, but there's something about those pictures
that makes you want what they're selling. Or you notice that your favorite sleazy reality show character is
selling those products. He likes that character, so why wouldn't you like something he endorses? The ads can
then offer you something, something exclusive, something important, something you didn't even know you
wanted in the first place. That is persuasion.

Next, think about the last politician you saw giving a speech. Did they approach the podium with an air of
confidence and ease or an air of nervousness and discomfort? If the speaker was sure, did you hear what he
was saying? Did you notice his body language? Were they able to effectively control and manipulate the crowd
just by using certain gestures? If so, it is very likely that this politician has mastered the art of persuasion.
Politicians think about everything they will say and do during their speech. They plan every pause, every gesture,
every part of the speech (focusing on the political climate) to capture the audience's undivided attention. For
example, in today's political game, fear plays an important role in the art of persuasion. Fear shapes the way a
person thinks, speaks, and interacts with their environment. Even if you are not a politician, you can still use his
techniques in your daily life.

Finally, before we continue, I want you to think about a friend who can get you to do whatever you want, even
if you don't want to do it. If that friend is moving, you help them move. If they have a problem, you help solve
that problem. Thinking a little more about this friend, does he use guilt or any other emotional appeal to get
you to do what he wants? Or does he offer you something in return? They may do this based on the possibility
of a closer relationship with you to get what they want or offer something they know you need.

They rarely do it, but they make you think that one day you will achieve the goal they have set for you. This is a
form of emotional persuasion. The friend sees his weakness and takes advantage of it. Unfortunately, these
tactics are used not only by friends but by everyone in society. Persuasion is something you cannot avoid, but it
is something you can harness, utilize, and implement for yourself to effectively navigate the entire society.
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Chapter 1: The Psychology of Persuasion

Basic Principles of Psychology
Since ancient Greek philosophers' studies of persuasive speech, modern scholars have turned their attention
away from communication and have turned their gaze to the deeper psychological workings of persuasion.
Today's modern scholars focus their studies on how our minds react and use persuasion in our normal interactions.
One such study found that persuasive emotional appeals are something we can naturally do, even without being
aware of it. The researchers found that people subconsciously emphasize certain words to evoke an
emotional response from the other party to get the desired result. The interesting finding in the study was that
the speaker was unaware of the use of any kind of emotional appeal or even aware of changing the way
they deliver their request. What this study shows is that we all instinctively use hidden persuasive talents that
incorporate emotional manipulation to get something we need. From that case study, we have learned that our
basic instincts provide us with the ability to persuade. Before we can truly harness this power within us, we must
first be able to identify and define the psychological aspects of persuasion.

In this text, we will discuss ways to use persuasion to improve yourself while incorporating covert
emotional manipulation. Before going into more detail, we must first understand the underlying principles of
psychological persuasion and how we can use these tactics to get what we want.

To better understand the psychological aspects of persuasion, we must understand our own perceptions of mind
manipulation. If you believe that persuasive techniques and emotional manipulation will not work for you or
that others are more easily influenced than you are, you do not have the self-awareness to use
persuasion appropriately to your advantage. Being self-aware and in control of every aspect of how you think and
how you respond will give you the skills to use persuasive techniques to your advantage. You must be aware
that everyone can be mentally manipulated and no one is safe from such persuasive tactics. However, anyone
can learn how to use mind manipulation techniques to avoid becoming a victim, while also becoming a master of
persuasion.

As mentioned in the scenarios presented in the introduction, we are bombarded with persuasive tactics
everywhere we go. As you begin your journey to becoming a master of mental manipulation, begin
taking note of every piece of persuasive material or any persuasive person you encounter each day. Write down
the strategies used in each scenario to help you better understand how they are trying to manipulate your
thinking. Once you start focusing on those tactics, you'll be surprised how common manipulation is. Once
you realize this, you'll start to feel like Rowdy Roddy Piper in the '80s horror/sci-fi classic, They Live. In the film,
Rowdy has discovered a pair of sunglasses that reveal that humanity has been invaded by alien life forms that
control us with subliminal messages. Once the sunglasses are on, the audience sees that billboards, money,
magazines, and people are tricks that keep us ignorant and blissful, but still consuming. If you've never seen the
movie,
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I suggest you find a copy and observe the manipulation techniques used by those alien life forms.

The techniques used are not as out of this world as you may think. Marketing companies use subliminal
messages in their ads to get us to buy their products. If you know these tactics, you will be able to control your
mind and prevent someone from manipulating your way of thinking. Once you do that, you will no longer be a
victim of the lies that are presented to us every day. You will become more observant in your life and, in turn,
more powerful. People who persuade desire non-observers. The less observant a person is, the easier it is to
manipulate their way of thinking. By noticing these techniques in your daily life, you will be better prepared not only
to evade manipulation, but also to harness it for your own social benefit.

To better understand these persuasive techniques and their practical uses in society, we must first analyze
and dissect the writings of Dr. Richard Cialdini in his book titled Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion. Dr.
Cialdini, who is a Regents Professor Emeritus of Psychology and Marketing at Arizona State University,
published that text in 1984 and in it he focused on the aspects of psychological persuasion found in the world of
marketing. Since the publication of his work, many academics, politicians, and businesspeople have used Dr.
Cialdini's writings to understand the concepts of psychological persuasion and incorporate his findings
into their path to success. In fact, Donald Trump used Dr. Cialdini's methods in his presidential campaign that
ultimately elected him president of the United States of America. These steps are a great foundation for anyone
who wants to begin integrating persuasive tactics into their plan, to gain skills in mental manipulation. Dr. Cialdini
broke down the complexities of psychological persuasion into more digestible concepts with these six
characteristics: reciprocity, commitment and consistency, social proof, taste, authority, and scarcity.

Reciprocity: The first principle in Dr. Cialdini's text is that of reciprocity. Reciprocity is the action of the
persuader to offer something to the other party. What is being offered should be something the other party
might want or something they don't even know they want until they offer it. Once the persuader has offered a
need to the persuadee, he has already laid the foundation to begin the manipulation process. The
persuadee feels indebted to the persuader because whatever is offered makes the persuadee feel that the
persuader is motivated by a disinterested need, which is to help the persuadee. The important element for
the persuader to follow is that what is being offered must be something that the persuadee believes is exclusive,
unique, or something that makes the persuadee feel special or connected to the persuader.

For example, the scenario mentioned in the introduction to this text describes a friend who constantly
gets you to do what he needs. In that scenario, that friend has offered you something you want (it could be a closer
relationship) to help you get what you want. As a persuader in this situation, you feel that you are not only helping
your friend but, on the contrary, you are helping yourself. But the reality of the situation is that your friend is using
you for his benefit. She keeps him under her control because the possibility of a closer relationship is out of
reach, so she constantly works to acquire it; consequently, effectively keeping you under their control.

Even if nothing is ever given in the scenario, you will still feel indebted to that other person, because there is a
chance that one day you will receive what you have been offered.
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Psychologists have discovered that our minds are hardwired to want to return a favor when we are offered
something we want or think we want. We feel grateful to the persuader for offering something we want or need.
Originally, it may not have been something we even knew we wanted, but through the persuasion process, we
began to want it more and more. We believe that we are working towards an ultimate prize which in turn changes
our way of thinking. Using this concept can help you create a connection with those you want to convince. If they
win your debt, they feel they are obligated to follow what you say and what you do. Ultimately, once the offer has
been made, the process of mind manipulation has already begun.

As a demonstration, let's focus on a popular television series from the last decade, How I Met Your Mother. In
one episode, it is revealed that Ted is being held back by an attractive pharmacology sales representative. Ted
explains that there is a chance for a closer relationship, but he just needs to remain obligated to her, because
his patience will one day be rewarded. The woman constantly promises Ted that one day something can
happen between them, but it will take time. He thinks that's okay because he believes that one day he will
have a relationship with her. Unfortunately, for Ted, that's not the case. This is a persuasive relationship. The
woman is receiving something from Ted (emotional support) and she is offering him something in return (a real
relationship). Ted only walks away from this relationship when he identifies the tactics she is using. In that
scenario, both parties are to blame. The woman, for offering something she knows she will never give, and Ted for
not being attentive enough in this situation.
In persuasion, you must be aware, or you are very likely to fall victim to their techniques.

Commitment & Consistency: The next aspect mentioned in Cialdini's text is commitment and consistency. The
concept here focuses on winning the loyalty of the persuadee. As mentioned above, these aspects
are tailored for marketing, but can be easily incorporated into a person's everyday life. Commitment and
consistency looks at how people, once they have made a decision about something (even if other options are
available) will stick with it because they feel they are making the right decision about it. They are committed
to abide by that decision because a person does not want to change their mind and show that they have
made a mistake in their original decision.

It is in our nature as humans to disagree with being wrong. In the marketing world, that means getting your
clientele engaged with your business and having them show public support for your company and spread the
word about it to others. Now we are not a business, but we can use these concepts to relate to the
psychological aspects of persuasion. For example, going back and referring to the scenario involving your
friend, let's say you've already made the decision to commit to that relationship. You refuse to turn your back on
this friend because you know that one day you will receive what he is offering you, a closer relationship.
When other friends try to tell you that this friend is just using you, you will publicly defend him and tell them
that they don't understand your relationship, but in reality, you don't want to be wrong. Your friend has created in
you a commitment to him.

As a persuader, you must create a sense of coherence with your persuade. They need to want to choose
you. They need to know what to expect from a relationship with you. You can do this by setting certain limits.
Boundaries are important in any relationship because they give both parties relationship guidelines to follow. If you
are trying to persuade another, you must be the one to set the boundaries. To clarify, you should make
yourself available to the other person, but on your own terms. They need to know that your time is important and if
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you give them that time, they should feel like you've made them a priority in your life. When you make another
person a priority, they will feel compelled to continue the relationship. Remember, be part of their life, but don't
let them control yours.

Social proof: The third psychological aspect of persuasion mentioned in Dr. Cialdini's text is that of social proof.
Social proof, also known as informational social influence, plays on what is called herd behavior. Herd behavior is
our tendency as humans to follow the crowd. We will make a decision based on the decisions of others. If a
persuader is accepted by a larger group of individuals, it is easier for them to gain mental manipulation over others.
Humans tend to gravitate toward people and products that are highly coveted by those around us. We want what
is popular, because in turn it makes us feel popular and we feel accepted by the whole. In persuasive mental
manipulation, what is important to keep in mind is that the way of thinking is not only in the hands of the
persuader but also in the hands of the population.

But how does one person shape the mind of another with the help of society? The best way to help your social
proof is to use external sources (i.e. social media, coworkers, and friends) to achieve your goal. If the persuadee
sees that the persuader is accepted by everyone around them, then it is easier for the persuader's thinking
to form positively toward the persuader.

For example, imagine you are running for political office in your hometown. Before you can begin running
for office, you should take note of how you are perceived in the community. Do others know who you are? Are you
accepted? If not, what can you do to gain their acceptance? To get started, you can use the two steps already
mentioned in the text and expand them. Give constituents what they want, something that makes them feel
special. For example, offer tax cuts or a banquet with local celebrities to publicly praise their support. Second,
make sure they are committed to you and your cause. Ask them to talk to friends and family about your
campaign and explain what it can do for the community. Since you have already offered your constituents
something they want, they will feel compelled to talk about your character. Next, look for people in the community
who have high positions and who are seen as the upper echelon to promote your campaign. These tactics
will play directly into the herd mentality of your voters. If attractive, wealthy people show their support for
you, then more voters will be willing to vote for you, because they see you as someone who is respected and
has a high status in society. You can also gain followers by using social media as a platform to gain more support.
Social media can play an important role in gaining social proof because people can go to your profile and see
exactly how many followers you have. The higher the number, the more likely people are to believe they have
strong social proof. Once you have strong public support, then you have the social proof you will need.

For those readers who do not wish to run for political office, these techniques, if implemented correctly, can
work for you in your daily life. To illustrate, imagine that you are trying to get a date with someone you find
attractive. The person you want to date will be more willing to say yes if they have a strong, positive
reputation. They will also be more willing to go on a date with you if you have some kind of social media
presence. Think about a time when you were asked out on a date: what was the first thing you did? Checked
Their Social Media Presence If they didn't have a strong social media presence or even an account, you might
not even be interested in dating them because
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They could not judge their social position by the reactions of others. Although we may not be aware of it, we
are highly motivated by the opinions of others. Although we may not be aware of it, we are highly motivated by the
opinions of others. If you tend to be a loner with very few friends, branch out and meet new people. If you don't
have a social media presence, create new profiles and start connecting with other people. Being social is
extremely helpful in the persuasion process because people who like you are much easier to trust, and a
trustworthy person is better equipped to use that to their advantage.

Liking: The fourth psychological aspect of persuasion is liking. Liking describes how people can be
persuaded by another person simply by the fact that they like the persuader.
For example, imagine that one of your friends has just started a small business. You may not like what they are
selling and you think their products are more expensive compared to other companies, but you like your friend, so
you shop with them. This is the basis of taste. Now, you don't have to befriend everyone you want to persuade,
but you do have to get them to like you. Dr. Cialdini writes that people like it if they present themselves in an
attractive way while displaying an engaging personality. If a person does not present themselves in a way
that is attractive, the person being persuaded will be less inclined to like the persuader and, in turn, any
persuasive technique will fail. In your process of getting mind manipulated, be sure to start reassessing how you
present yourself in public. By doing so, you will be able to connect with and persuade others much more easily.

Dr. Cialdini writes that complimenting others is a great tool for increasing one's likability factor. Everyone likes to
be flattered and feel special. When you are in a social situation, start complimenting others. Do it in a way that is
believable and in a way that doesn't make them feel uncomfortable. Try not to focus your praise too much on the
physical, but focus on a person's internal qualities. For example, comment on how someone is thoughtful,
caring, or honest. Praise makes the persuaded feel that they are appreciated and taken seriously. If a person
is complimented, they may not even realize they are being persuaded, because they are so focused on the
positivity ahead. In Cialdini's text he analyzes that in this section of the process, the persuader needs to
make some kind of friendly connection with the persuaded. This doesn't mean becoming their friend, but
rather making sure you enter their lives in a positive way. The persuadee needs to see this relationship as
open and trusting, so that the persuader does not question the persuader's motivation. Give the
persuadee a reason to trust or they will not be able to follow your message.

You may wonder if a person can improve their likability even if they have already made a negative
impression on someone. Dr. Cialdini explains that a person can change the way others perceive them, but it
takes work and great self-awareness. For example, let's say you're trying to impress your partner's parents. You
may have already encountered them in the past and they have shown that they do not enjoy your company. You
can slowly change your perspective by being a supportive and loving partner to your partner. If they see that you
put a lot of time and energy into this relationship, they will slowly begin to change their perspective of you. You
can also use compliments in your interactions with them to influence them. What's important to keep in mind
is that you can retroactively change how others perceive you, but it will take time and effort.

Authority: The fifth concept discussed in Dr. Cialdini's text is that of authority. This psychological aspect
shows that human beings have natural inclinations to follow those who are in
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the power. We will not question those in authority even if there is a possibility of harm, because we believe
that there will be a positive result if we follow blindly. We blindly follow because we believe that those in authority
are motivated by their need to help and protect us.
Unfortunately, many times, that is not the case. If we look at our political environment, we see many politicians in
positions of authority who deliberately mislead the public for their own monetary gain. What's interesting is that
these politicians still have the support of their voters, because those constituents still believe that the politicians are
looking out for their best interest.

Cialdini comments that there are three concepts that affect the way we identify those in authority. The three
concepts are title, clothing and attire. Each focuses on the outward appearance of power and authority that can be
very useful in persuasion. Title focuses on the titles we are given in society. We tend to respect those who have
the title of doctor because we respect the hard work that goes into that profession. We will show respect for
those who have the title of senator or president because we respect those who work in government. If
you don't have a degree, don't worry, because there are other aspects of this concept that you can use to
your advantage. For Cialdini's concept of clothing, he writes that an individual must dress appropriately. We
are attracted to those who are well groomed. We tend to believe that those who are better dressed are smarter
than someone who wears sweatpants and crocodiles. We desire attractiveness because we want to be attractive.

For example, if a persuader is trying to get a date, they will not approach the unshowered, unshaven, and
unattractive individual. The persuader will approach the situation with intelligence, attractiveness, and a
general air of confidence.

The next concept that Cialdini discusses is that of cheating. Attire is a material possession that shows a person's
status in society. We tend to respect those with the best cars, the best clothes, and the biggest houses. We live
in a society where material wealth is more important than actual character. Again, if you are not blessed with
material goods, you can follow the steps below to help you on your persuasion journey.

The last aspect that Cialdini briefly mentions is that of self-confidence. Dr. Cialdini writes that without trust a person's
persuasive techniques will crumble. If you plan to persuade someone, you should act as if you have everything
under control. If you are an apprehensive person who scares easily, the persuadee may find it difficult to
follow your lead. If you are someone who finds it difficult to connect with your confidence, you need to reevaluate
yourself and find that confidence. People won't believe you if you don't believe in yourself. If you lack confidence,
work on your confidence by interacting with just one person. One factor that is very important to
remember in persuasion is that people are most susceptible to persuasion in one-on-one communications.
Slowly build your confidence by interacting with one person at a time. Once you've mastered that, you'll be able to
persuade anyone. Be aware of how you interact with that person and use language that puts the person at ease.

If a persuader uses volatile language and anger, the persuadee may begin to feel uncomfortable and shy away
from maintaining their commitment to the persuader. Remember that persuasion can be used in both our
actions and the way we speak. Laying the foundation for persuasion is time consuming, but once the tactic is
mastered, you will begin to see changes for the better.

Scarcity: The last concept presented in Cialdini's text is that of scarcity. People want things that are hard to get and
that other people want. If there is a limited supply, people will do everything
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everything possible to acquire that item. This relates to the psychological drain of persuasion by focusing
on the needs and desires of the persuaded. Cialdini says that when scarcity is introduced into a situation, our
brains go crazy. We must have what is offered to us, and we must have it now. We can't let someone else have
it because we want it. This is called anticipated repentance. Anticipatory regret is when we envision our future
without the product being offered. We need it so we won't have to feel this pain in the future.

If we do not use these tactics for marketing, we must find other commodities that we can use to get what we want
from the persuasive person. As a persuader, the best commodity you can leverage is your time. If you let the
other party know how valuable and scarce their time is, they will be more likely to fall victim to mental manipulation.
As a persuader, you need to make sure the other party knows and understands how desirable you are. In that
step, don't let your ego take control. You can clearly share how important your time is, but don't do it boastfully.
This can be very difficult because once we know that we are desirable, we will begin to change the way we
think about who we are and think that we are better than we really are. Remember to avoid ego when using
mental manipulation tactics, because people will ignore your message if they see you as presumptuous or full of
yourself. That doesn't mean that confidence can't play an important role in this step, because confidence is
different than ego. Ego is something that without control can be the downfall of the emotional manipulation game.
If you present yourself in a confident way that shows the other party that their time and energy is important, they
will most likely agree with you.

To illustrate scarcity, let's focus on the friend who makes you do what you need. Let's say this friend has
recently moved, but you still try to keep in touch with them. They tell you that with their new job they don't have a
lot of time to talk, but you make sure to find a time when they are available. You know that if you lose this time
talking to them, you may lose a closer relationship with them in the future. They tend to call him late at night,
which isn't very helpful since he works early in the morning. You sacrifice your time and sleep so that you
can only talk to them for a few minutes every few days. Your friend has shown you that his time is valuable and
instead of realizing how valuable your time is, you waste your time and sleep. This is the persuasion concept of
scarcity in action.

Summary: Throughout this chapter, we have discussed the history of persuasive communication and modern
studies of the psychological functioning of persuasion. We were able to identify how our brains can use
persuasive emotional techniques without our conscious effort because we were born with the innate ability
to use emotional manipulation. This has opened the door to a greater understanding of mind manipulation and
how to use it in your everyday life. Throughout the rest of the text, we will delve deeper into persuasive reasoning
to identify not only how others use these techniques, but also how you can use these techniques to acquire
those things in your life that you never thought you could have. If mental manipulation is something you strive
for, continue on your path to enlightenment. You must be aware that persuasion requires effort and study, and
without both you will end up failing. The text of Dr.
Cialdini gave us a great foundation for persuasion, and now throughout this text, there are case studies and
detailed steps to help you use your strengths to get into the minds of others.
Once you understand the concepts that follow, you will be more than capable of using persuasive techniques for
your own self-improvement.
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Chapter 2: Masters of Persuasion and Emotional Manipulation

Now that you have a basic understanding of the psychological aspects of persuasion, we can look at case
studies where figureheads in our society have used mental manipulation to gain their power and control. The
first case study we will focus on is the volatile 2016 presidential election. We will analyze the persuasive
techniques used by both presidential candidates: Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton. We will focus on Donald
Trump's use of Dr. Cialdini's text and Hillary Clinton's use of emotional manipulation. The next case study will
focus on the leading entrepreneurs in our society, focusing on media mogul Oprah Winfrey and Facebook creator
Mark Zuckerberg. We will discuss the tactics they have used to get to where they are today. We will highlight how
their manipulations have positioned them as two of the most powerful people and influencers of our time. The
last section will discuss how social media has incorporated the tactics found in Dr. Cialdini's writings to
keep us addicted and wanting more.

The 2016 Presidential Race: As mentioned in Chapter 1, politicians leverage their mastery of persuasion to gain
the commitment and respect of their constituents. They focus entirely on their public image to get the support
they want. They will cleverly find ways to use their speeches, interviews, and even campaign merchandise to put
themselves in the minds of the American public. To discuss this topic, we will focus on the turbulent presidential
race of 2016. We will focus on the persuasive tactics used by the leading Republican and Democratic
candidates: Donald Trump and Hillary Rodham Clinton. Both parties incorporated different manipulation
techniques to gain the support and respect of their voting public. Donald Trump used many of the tactics written in
Dr.
Cialdini while incorporating his own ways of communicating with his audience. He used his years working in the
business sector to help strengthen his campaign. Hillary Clinton focused not on social proof or likability, but instead
focused on her political achievements and attacking her opponent. It centered on the fear that an unqualified,
untested businessman would get the job of president. Their tactics focused primarily on fear, while Trump
focused on many different aspects that ultimately won him the presidency.

Nomination Process: Before we focus on the tactics used between both Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton, we
will focus on the political climate during this presidential race. Barack Obama, a Democrat, was finishing
an eight-year term as president. The Republican Party was ready to move toward the White House and
regain the control they had eight years earlier under George W. Bush. This was a volatile time in our history
because both parties were fighting to win the presidency. The Democratic Party pushed Hillary Clinton as a
favorite while heckled or silenced opponents running against her in the party. This, unfortunately, caused the
Democratic Party to lose any kind of momentum for the presidency, trusting a political figure that the American
public did not consider trustworthy even though she had been working in the political arena for more than thirty
years.

The Republican Party did not have a clear choice of candidate at the beginning of his race. Initially, there were
more than sixteen candidates to be the Republican candidate. The numbers soon dwindled, leaving twelve
during the Iowa Caucus. The Republican Party's tactic seemed to be to run as many candidates as possible and
hopefully one would stick with the American public. The candidates
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Republicans ranged from convicted politicians to doctors and media moguls. The Republican Party tried to pressure
candidates who were trusted politicians, but the American public had other ideas about it. The only candidate who
managed to beat the other candidates using his manipulation and fear tactics was Donald Trump, a man who was
known for his work in the world of business and entertainment, but not for his political savvy. He may not have had
a basic understanding of politics, but he did know how to brand and sell his image, an image that took
decades to establish.

Throughout the nomination process, the media clung to stories that focused on the controversies contained on both
sides. This, in turn, helped Donald Trump to capitalize on the confusion of the American public and become
President of the United States of America. He was able to show how the media and politicians already in office were
not focused on the working man and woman, but were instead focused on money and social status. The American
public believed the words of a billionaire over the words of journalists and politicians.

Donald Trump
As mentioned above, Donald Trump took advantage of the psychological concepts of persuasion presented in Dr.
Cialdini's text to obtain the presidency. The first thing he did was offer his constituents something they wanted:
security. In Donald Trump's campaign, he insisted on how dangerous the United States had become. He would
use misinformation to play on the public's fears by shouting about dangers coming from outside the country. Even
though most of the information presented was not fact, he was able to use his persuasive but childish way of speaking
to gain the respect of American voters.

Donald Trump may not have had a great understanding of public speaking, but he did have a great understanding
of what needs to be said to get the desired result. Throughout his campaign, Trump used vague and meaningless
statements that his voting public could, in turn, put their own spin on.
This is a powerful form of manipulation because even if Trump never said a certain thing, his voters could take his
words and translate them into what they wanted to hear. Trump was also very astute when it came to his brand.
Trump had been in the business world for more than forty years, where he quickly gained the public's attention and
admiration. He was shown as a man who worked from the bottom (a small loan of $1 million from his father) to
become one of the world's leading business magnates. Trump sold his image as one of luxury, exclusivity and
authority. It was an image that the American public wanted to buy. For the entire time he was running for office, Trump
was able to brand his campaign effectively. Trump coined the term “Make America Great Again” and even used
that term to sell his political merchandise. Trump was so calculating that he even had the hats produced in China
at a lower cost. The irony of the slogan "Make America Great Again" written on hats produced in China was
astonishing, but their branding worked. Now, the term "MAGA" is everywhere, on the news, t-shirts, hats, and even
YouTube music videos. Every time you hear that term, you automatically think of Trump.

Hillary Rodham Clinton

Hillary Clinton, a veteran politician, took her campaign in a completely different direction by focusing on fears of
a Donald Trump presidency. At this point in her career, Hillary Clinton is not
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He had a lot of public support. She was caught up with some controversies that caused the American public
to distrust her policies. One of those controversies was the bullying of the Democratic Party to oust other
candidates more palatable to the American public. These actions made Hillary Clinton a political puppet who
promised but failed to deliver.

Even though she had worked hard and did a lot for the American public, her likeability and social proof were
low. This was unfortunate, because at this point in her campaign, Clinton resorted to doing what Trump had
done throughout his entire campaign: name calling. She began looking at a man who had no political experience
and up until that point, was a supporter of the Democratic Party.
He noted that Trump could easily flip the script if money were involved. The American public did
not take kindly to these attacks and rejected them. Call her out for the outrageous amounts of money
she charged to go to a speaking engagement. He gradually lost his political respect and became a bully, just
like Donald Trump. She played on his fears of an unqualified artist by becoming president and began using
that in her political campaign. Instead of focusing on the issues at hand, Hillary focused on the possibility
of a Trump presidency.

Clinton, during her campaign, should have focused on her own social proof and likability. He needed to reinvent
his public image because his persuasive techniques were not working. The American public wanted to vote for
someone they thought they could trust. Unfortunately for Clinton, she wasn't the one.

Effective Strategy Used

The only strategy that helped catapult Trump to the presidency was fear. We will briefly discuss how the
fear aspect can help in the mental manipulation game. When we are afraid, we tend to lose all logical
thinking. The emotion of fear runs rampant in our minds, so we cannot think clearly, but if someone speaks and
says that they will help us or save us from this unknown assailant, we will be more inclined to listen to them and
trust them. This is exactly what happened during both sides' campaigns. Trump played on the public's fear of the
"other" coming to make a living. As mentioned above, this is not really the case, but since fear does not work
according to logic, Trump was able to easily manipulate the minds of his voters. Hillary, even though she didn't
win, had some luck with her fear, tapping into the minds of voters who didn't want The Apprentice host to become
the next president.

When using persuasion, keep in mind the power of fear. If you can control your fear, you will be better
equipped to help shape fear into others. This tactic is one that should only be used sparingly because once
fear takes too much hold of the mind, the mind can be hard to shape.

Entrepreneurs In this next section, we will discuss two very important entrepreneurs of our time. One is a
media mogul who has worked from humble beginnings to become one of the most influential people of our
time: Oprah Winfrey. The other is a man credited with creating one of the most popular and powerful social
media platforms to date: Mark Zuckerberg. The difference between these two people is how they use their
public image to gain their authority. These entrepreneurs used persuasive tactics that are best suited to
their personalities and their ultimate goal.
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Oprah Winfrey
It's safe to say that Oprah Winfrey has become one of the most influential women of our time.
He worked hard to build a strong reputation and incorporate his brand into almost every home in the United
States and many parts of the world. The only way Oprah Winfrey gained her place of power was not through
manipulation, but by creating a public image so strong that her opinion has become one of the most respected in
the nation. To go a little into her backstory, Oprah was born into poverty. She was born in a small town in
Mississippi where she faced many adversities: rape, physical abuse, and racial discrimination. She was
able to overcome these obstacles in her life to slowly work her way into the eye of the American public. She
started out as the youngest news anchor for a station in Nashville and from there, she moved up until she was
the host of her own show. Oprah was able to become a strong part of the American psyche by creating a new
form of talk show. Their talk show was a confessional show where guests could openly share their stories,
without judgment. Through all of this, Oprah was able to create a personality so strong and trustworthy that now
her word and opinions are more powerful than the president.

To focus more on his persuasive techniques, we will have to look again at Dr. Cialdini's text. One concept he
discusses is that of social proof and it is one that Oprah cleverly uses. Starting out, Oprah had smaller followers,
but through her ability to present herself as open—confessing issues she had with her weight, crying with her
guests, showing her vulnerabilities—her following began to grow. People related to his vulnerability and in turn
this led to more and more people pursuing his career. Once Oprah gained the support of the American public,
she turned her attention to gaining the support of other respected celebrities. As mentioned above, if a product is
appreciated by someone we admire, we are more likely to want that product. When Oprah started
having celebrity guests on her show, her ratings began to skyrocket and caused her social proof level to skyrocket.

Now that she has become the most influential person in the world, Oprah still uses persuasive techniques to
maintain her power. Oprah uses her authority tactic to continue to keep the American public engaged and
interested in her next projects, whether it be another book or a TV channel. For example, she uses her title
and brand (Oprah's Book Club) to help others sell their books. She may also use her title to take away another
of his social proofs, which became apparent when James Frey published his memoir, A Million Little Pieces.
At first, Oprah used her influence to get her sales, but when she discovered the book was mostly fiction, she
destroyed her public reputation. She also uses her material possessions (garments) for support. When her
TV show was still on the air, episodes titled "Oprah's Favorite Things" were Oprah's chance to market products
she claimed to own. Audience members would receive free products and the audience at home would want to
buy these products because Oprah said she used them. This is an effective manipulation strategy. We don't
need the products offered, but because someone we admire uses them, we want to use them too.

Mark Zuckerberg
Now that we have discussed a person with a strong public image, we will now discuss the manipulation
tactics of a public figure who does not have strong social proof, Mark Zuckerberg.
Mark Zuckerberg is a name that has only been in the public forum for the last thirteen years, but in
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In those years, Mark Zuckerberg created a powerful social media empire: Facebook. Originally created for
college students, Facebook has become one of the biggest social media platforms of our time, surpassing earlier
versions like Myspace and Friendster. Facebook gave the American public the opportunity to connect with
friends, family, and new friends from around the world. Now, Facebook has done a lot of good, but let's focus on
the manipulation tactics that Mark Zuckerberg and his coworkers use to stay on top of social media.

We will focus on the privacy controversy that has been a topic of discussion in the news and politics.

Since Mark Zuckerberg is now more visible than before, his personality has come under some scrutiny.
Many websites equate Mark Zuckerberg with evil and some even go so far as to label him a robot. One has to
wonder, how can someone with such a terrible public persona be one of the most powerful men in the world?

To start, we'll focus on Zuckerberg's personality style. His friends classify him as a conscientious person who
takes his time when answering questions. He is astute because he understands the power one can have over
our words. His way of speaking paints him as a calculating individual who is careful in everything he says
and does which describes him as untrustworthy. He is not charismatic or attractive in his presentation, but he can
manipulate the use of his product. If he had not created Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg would not be as
powerful as he is today. Even though Zuckerberg doesn't have a strong personality, he uses his astute
personality style to surround himself with those who do.

In an article written for MSNBC, a journalist shares his encounters with Mark Zuckerberg and Facebook staff. The
journalist writes about how he organized the meeting with staff and Zuckerberg to discuss privacy issues. As we've
all seen, Facebook has come under fire for how they use our private information. The government has begun an
investigation to see how far Facebook's clutches reach. When the journalist entered the meeting, he said he
was greeted by smiling faces and warm personalities. He said his level of discomfort decreased, and he found
himself relaxed and calm.
After leaving the meeting, he felt happy about his interaction with them and realized that they were not
doing anything wrong, but after a few days, he started thinking about the meeting. He began to look back at
the situation and reevaluated the information presented to him. He realized that his questions were never
fully answered, but the staff responded in such a way that he believed they had in fact been answered. For
example, when he pressed the staff about how our private information was being used, the staff reassured
him with a smile but never gave a clear answer. They talked about the topic and used phrases that
reassured the journalist. The staff acted as if there was nothing wrong, so the journalist couldn't help but feel
the same way. This is a form of manipulation. The workers created a safe space for the journalist, so he was
blinded by his own comfort.

Mark Zuckerberg may not have strong social proof, but what he does have is the ability to read others. You are
observant in social situations and use your own emotional intelligence and self-awareness to use this to your
advantage. Even if you are not able to present yourself as a nice person, you can use your personality traits
(conscientiousness, more detailed explanation in Chapter 3) to get the power you want.

Social Media
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Now that we have discussed the co-founder of one of the most popular social networking sites, Facebook,
we need to see how social media has slowly infiltrated our daily lives using simple persuasive techniques.
Throughout this section, we will address some of the techniques discussed in Dr. Cialdini's writings.
Understanding these concepts will help us better understand how social media can affect our thinking lives
and how we can use social media for our persuasion tactics.

First, we will focus on the concept of reciprocity and how social media uses this concept against us. As
mentioned above, reciprocity means that we are being offered something.
With social media, what's on offer is the ability to connect with millions of people around the world. We have the
opportunity to learn more from others and use these social media platforms to gain popularity and fame.
Before social media, we were easily able to survive without constant contact with other people, but now
our minds have been trained to constantly need that connection. We don't need social networks, but social media
platforms now make it difficult to live without them, because without them we feel disconnected from the world.
For example, if you don't have a Facebook account, you may not be able to keep up with local events in your area,
or if you don't have a Twitter account, you may not know what's happening in the news world. . Twitter has become
a platform for people to keep up with the inner workings of our president.

Donald Trump is not the first politician to use a Twitter account, but he is the first to use his account to share
important information about what is happening in the White House. Most politicians see this as ignorant because
everyone in the world can read the tweets, and some of the tweets share information that should not be put in the
hands of our enemies, but what these politicians don't see is the ultimate power that the networks now have in all
of us. Trump may not be smart, but he is cunning. He is able to see how powerful social media is (instant
connection with billions of people) and use that to his advantage. Social networks are now a new form of
communication that makes the user believe that their opinions are important and should be heard, even if
those opinions are unreasonable and illogical. Social media has effectively manipulated our minds into
believing that a strong social media presence equates to higher social status. For example, China now
uses an app that rates its citizens. The higher the social media score, the higher the person is in society. This app
convinces people to be kinder, more open and more aware of their actions, so they don't lose their social standing.
We may not have reached that point yet in the United States, but the way social media now equates to social
status, we're not far off.

One quality that social media incorporates is that of social proof and like. If a person is attractive and has
a lot of followers, we begin to value their opinions. People now gain fame and notoriety by using their social
media accounts. Take, for example, Instagram celebrity Dan Bilzerian. Dan, a self-described world traveler
and professional poker player, has over fifteen million followers. His images highlight his life of extravagance, and
his posts feature images of him surrounded by very attractive women in bikinis. Dan, in his posts, only
appears in high-end clothing and features his many expensive possessions. He is selling a reality that everyone
desires. Dan has capitalized on his fortune by using this platform to sell products. You now have companies
contacting you to use your products to advertise on their Instagram posts. The normal public sees his extravagant
lifestyle and automatically respects his opinions.
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because it has what we want. People strive to become social media famous because they see the power and influence
one can gain from it.

Social media also plays on our need for instant gratification. We live in a world where we can get everything we want by
simply driving to the nearest store, or if we don't want to leave our homes, we can buy products online. Society has become
a consumer paradise where everything we want and need is within our reach. Patience is a virtue that we no longer
celebrate in our society. We are constantly connected to everyone and if we don't receive the attention we want,
or think we deserve, we will react with anger. Social media platforms offer us the opportunity to like, share and comment
whenever we want. We get that gratification when we log in and see someone liking a status or retweeting something
we've said.

This instant gratification that social media offers us is manipulating our minds to want more. We hope to get reactions
from everything we do on social media because it, in turn, validates our opinions as important.

In the process of mental manipulation, we can use social media to our advantage if we understand how it
works. For example, let's say you're starting an online business. Their business focuses on making unique and
customizable souvenirs. This is a niche market, but one where there is a lot of competition. Nostalgia and memorabilia
have become one of the main marketable products of the last five years. Consumers who were children in the 1980s
and 1990s now want products that make them think of happier times. To capture your audience, you must first
harness the power of social media. Create a visually interesting website and promote your product as something
rare or exclusive. Explain how this is something every fan will want in their collection. You use not only the concept of
reciprocity but also the concept of

shortage.

You are playing on your market's anticipated regret. Once they have decided to buy the product from you, you now
have them obligated to your business. Now you can offer them special discounts if they share your website with
their friends and family. You give them this as a way to feel connected to your business. They have made the decision to
go with you and now you need to make sure that they do not regret the decision they made. Even if they find another
company that sells the same products for a lower price, they will feel obligated to stay with your company because you
have given them special privileges for being a customer. It's our basic need to feel appreciated, so if you make sure
your clientele feels appreciated, they will stick with your company. If you start to slowly grow your follower base, other
people will see all the followers you have and will be more willing to join in to help your business. If they see positive
comments and reviews, they will be more willing to buy your product. Your clients are not aware that you are using the
basic psychological concepts of persuasion to gain their support.

The important aspect of social media is that you can create your own persona even if it's not entirely true. Instagram
celebrities use lighting tricks and photo retouching apps to create images that say to the audience, this is what you want
and this is who you want to be. They are selling you a lie that you can't help but believe. Social media offers us an
escape from our lives and the opportunity to live through the lives we see on the screen. We feel an increase in
confidence
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when one of our messages receives more than ten likes because while we sit in our pajamas eating Cheetos, we want
to believe the lie as much as everyone else. Social media targets our need for acceptance and exploits it to keep us
addicted. It is the best manipulation because social media reshapes our thinking to desire constant feedback for everything
we do and everything we say.

Throughout the discussion of social media, what the reader needs to remember is that persuasion is about reshaping the
way we think and react. As mentioned in this section, social media changes our mindset to desire this instant gratification
found on sites like Facebook, Twitter, and SnapChat. We are able to put ourselves out there and get an automatic
response. We must remember that before this point in our history, the only way we could gain social acceptance
was to actually go out into society. We weren't as concerned with the lives and treatment of others, because we were so
focused on our own lives. Social media has now turned us into self-absorbed zombies struggling to achieve social standing
in a world filled with billions and billions of people.

Summary

Now that we have a basic understanding of how businesspeople, politicians, and social media platforms have risen
to power, we can use their persuasion tactics to get what we want in life. What we have learned from Oprah
Winfrey and Mark Zuckerberg is that we must adapt our persuasive tactics to our personalities. We must be able
to understand how our personalities work to manipulate each other's minds. In Chapter 3 of this text, we will delve into
the study of how to use our personality traits to better understand and harness the skills to successfully use
persuasion in our lives.
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Part II: Methods and Techniques

Chapter 3: How to use persuasion for your gain

Step 1: Control Your Self: Before a person can begin to successfully manipulate for profit, they must
understand their inner workings. A person needs to understand how their own mind works so that they can
effectively understand how they react to persuasion. Once a person has acquired this knowledge, they can use
it to better persuade and manipulate others.
People who understand how they think and how they respond to external stimuli are better equipped to use
this to their advantage in the manipulation process by having full control of the situation. Manipulation and
persuasion cannot be used by those who do not have control over their behaviors or at least understand them
because they have no idea how a mind responds to manipulation. Your tactics will be based on your own
point of view without considering the many external factors that are involved in manipulation. To help better
understand these techniques, we must first look at personality traits.

Basic Personality Traits in Psychology: There are five basic personality traits in psychology.
Each personality trait can be manipulated if the persuader has a working knowledge of how each personality
works. The personality traits discussed below highlight not only your strengths but also your weaknesses.

Openness: An open individual can easily connect with the experiences and points of view of others while also
being receptive to new experiences. They tend to engage more easily with others because they are excellent
listeners and tend to be more observant in their interactions. This quality is useful in the persuasion game because
an open person can connect with others and integrate into another person's life more easily than other
personality types. They can adapt to any social situation because they observe and understand the tone or
mood of the exchange. Conversely, this personality trait may also be susceptible to persuasive techniques,
because they are (as their name implies) open. Being open can be a weakness, especially if the information or
message being received is not carefully filtered. An open person can be a victim of mental manipulation because
they can understand how the other (persuasive) party can reach their conclusion, whatever it may be.

Awareness: A conscious individual can think about all aspects of their life. They are careful not to act out of
character. This person tends to be more calculated and less prone to spontaneity in their actions. They are
attentive and more focused on the task at hand than other personality traits. They are comfortable planning and
organizing, so they have a clear step-by-step plan outlining their actions. This personality trait is useful in the
manipulation process because people with it are cunning and can properly handle any situation, because they
have a set plan. They know how to manage their emotions and how to use their emotions to their advantage.
The weakness of this personality trait is the inability to deviate from the plan. Even the best plans can be seen
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affected by an unforeseen factor. A conscientious person may be better equipped to implement a

persuasion plan, but sometimes they are hindered by their own laser focus.

Extroversion: An extrovert is an individual who thrives in social situations and draws their energies from other
people. Extraverts gravitate toward community and generally act as gluers at social gatherings. They can easily
connect with any personality type because they don't let any social anxiety hinder their connections. They
usually give off an air of confidence and charisma, which most people find difficult to ignore. Extraverts tend
to acquire social proof and likability much easier than other personality types. As a result, they are considered
more trustworthy as well. Others are often captured by an extrovert's relaxed attitude and charismatic charm. This is
extremely useful in mind manipulation because people are more likely to follow someone with qualities that
they, in themselves, desire. The downside of extraversion centers on its tendencies to fall on the narcissistic thinking
scale. Extraverts tend to be selfish by nature, which can make it difficult to be critical of oneself, so they
cannot see their own character flaws. In persuasion, character defects can easily alter a plan of action by revealing to
the persuaded the tactics being used against them.

Agreeableness: A pleasant person is someone who can relate to those around them. Unlike one who is open, they
tend to connect on an emotional level. They can feel what another person is feeling just by talking to them and
even just looking at them. They are excellent at reading body language and discerning the communication styles
of others to find the deeper meaning behind actual communication. Kindness is a personality trait that can be
very useful in persuasion. People with this trait can read a person without being intrusive. They can connect with
another person without the other person feeling invaded or violated. Unfortunately, people who can empathize
have difficulty controlling their emotions. This can be a weakness that can and will be used against you. They can
be easily persuaded using emotional appeal tactics. People in this personality type tend to find the use of persuasion
for their personal benefit because they feel emotionally invested in the other person.

Neuroticism: A neurotic individual is one who tends to worry and overanalyze in every situation. They tend to
become obsessed with situations and focus too much on unimportant matters.
They tend to focus too much on the negative aspects of life as well. People who are neurotic are more
inclined to distrust others, so they are more difficult to persuade. They don't connect with others because they don't
trust others. Neurotic people tend to run on the thrill of worry motivated by fear. Fear can easily be used in manipulation
to reshape another person's mental point of view. A neurotic personality is easier to manipulate, but if they can
properly understand how fear works for them, they can use those tactics in manipulation.

Once an individual identifies their personality type, they can be better prepared for the mental manipulation process.
They are able to see their own qualities and focus on how they can use the strengths of their personality traits to
become a better persuader. For example, let's focus on the character Q. Q has been working in the same office for
the last ten years. He is up for a promotion, but there are many other candidates who, in Q's opinion, are better
suited for the position. Q tends to be a pessimistic person who focuses too much on the negative aspects of life.

Complains about not getting what he wants, even when he works for it. Q has already shown some traits
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personality negatives that fall within the category of neuroticism. In his pursuit of promotion, Q may
continue to focus on the negative, or he may use manipulative techniques to get the job he wants. Before his
first move, Q must understand his personality and how those traits can negatively affect his target.

As we know, Q is a neurotic person who over-analyzes a failure. One may wonder, how can a person like this
become a manipulator? Easy. You must first take control of your thinking. A person can control his thoughts by
taking an active response to how his mind works. For example, whenever Q focuses on the negative, he needs
to stop and change the way he thinks. This is a type of personal persuasion. He is taking his own hands in rewiring
his brain to focus on the positive and not the negative. He must also change the way he talks. You need
to be aware of the words or phrases you use in your daily life to make sure they are not imposing your negative
view of the world. For example, if someone asks Q about his promotion journey, he shouldn't respond with,
"Okay, I guess." I don't really think I'll get it," but rather respond with, "I feel like I deserve this promotion. I did the
hard work and I'm dedicated." The overall message you were trying to present has changed. Now, he has turned
something that was negative and turned it into something positive. This minor change not only affects the way Q
thinks and acts, but also how others react to Q. He, with his transition to the positive, opened the door to
persuasion.

People will start to see the change in Q and want to be around him. Q can use this to his advantage because,
as mentioned above, a person who likes him can be more easily persuaded.

Once he begins to take control of his own neurotic tendencies, Q is able to use his own negative tendencies
to manipulate the minds of his coworkers. One way you can do that is to plant the seed of doubt. The seed of
doubt in this situation involves using Q's own experience with fear to persuade others around him. For
example, when talking to his coworkers about the other candidates for promotion, Q may casually comment
on how he is unsure about attracting outside candidates, especially since they may not understand the inner
workings of the office. You can even mention a time in the past where an external candidate was brought in and
turned out poorly. Now, Q is not being negative, but he is expressing a valid concern he has for his
coworkers. His coworkers, since they already trust Q's opinions (thanks in part to Q's new configuration of his
mental perspective), may begin to see it from his side. They may begin to wonder why an external candidate
would even be considered for the position, especially given that such viable options already existed within the
company. Those coworkers would, in turn, express their concerns to the hiring committee, which could influence
their decision.

Q, by taking control of himself, was able to navigate through his thinking and use that to heighten the fears
and worries of others.

Now that we have discussed how personality traits can help the persuasion process, we can focus on taking
control of our communication by focusing on our body language. Body language is the non-verbal
communication that we all use in our interactions with others and that greatly influences the messages we try to
convey. For example, when a person is talking with their arms crossed over their chest, they unconsciously tell
others in the conversation that the interlocutor is closed. When we see this type of body language, we can
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walk away from the conversation. When using persuasion, it is important to know the body language that is being used so that it can be used
in the persuasion process.

Body Language Body

language is the form of non-verbal communication that we all use. Some people may be more animated with their gestures that incorporate
movements with their hands and arms, while others are more reserved. The three elements of body language that are important to focus on
during the persuasion process are eye contact, open posture, and active listening. These three components, if used correctly, can help a
persuader gain a foothold in the mental perspective of others.

Eye contact

Eye contact plays an important role in non-verbal communication. When one person is talking to another, eye contact shows that they are
engaged with the listener. If the listener's eyes are distracted by jumping around the room showing the speaker, they are not interested in what is
being discussed. Always provide good eye contact. Find a good balance of eye contact, because most people feel uncomfortable if someone is
giving them constant eye contact. The important thing to remember is to use your body language to make the other party feel comfortable
around you. The basics of persuasion begin by creating a positive environment that makes the other party feel inclined to be more open. A
person who is more open is more easily capable of being manipulated.

Open Posture

When communicating with another person, always keep an open stance. Refrain from crossing your arms or presenting an aggressive posture.
Stay in the neutral position, relaxed and free of tension, to create a welcoming environment for the other party. Connections with others can
easily be destroyed before they begin if body language is not properly controlled. Be aware of the other party's body language as well. If they start
to shut down, they may already be losing interest in what is being presented to them. If a person begins to close, he begins to mirror his
gestures.

Studies have shown that mirroring is an effective communication technique to get the other person to listen. Always keep body language in mind
because without it, persuasion cannot progress effectively.

Active listening

Active listening is the ability to show interest and engagement in another person's communication.
A person can show that they are actively listening by using body language (such as a head nod) or verbal response (such as a simple uh-
uh) to show the other party that they are being heard. When a person feels that they are being heard, they feel respected. Respect is
reciprocal. If you show respect for another, they will show you respect. Respect is a major player in persuading another individual to your
point of view. If the persuader has no respect, then they cannot infiltrate another person's way of thinking.

By using body language and understanding personality traits, an individual will be able to gain the knowledge necessary to better persuade and
manipulate in their daily lives. The important thing is to realize that persuasion, when done well, takes time and energy. It is not something that
can happen overnight, unless the other person is very susceptible to persuasion,
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which is rarely the case. If one wants to be able to persuade someone, one must realize that everyone reacts
differently to external stimuli. It is up to the persuader to not only know everything about his own inner workings,
but also the inner workings of others by using observation and communication skills.

Step #2: Promote Ourselves: We are drawn to those we find attractive, attractive, and interesting. We
don't want to be around those we consider negative, whiny, and openly manipulative, because who would
want to be around others who are the quintessential "Debbie Downer"? People want to be around others
who are attractive, engaging, funny, and self-sustaining. As mentioned in Dr. Cialdini's text, a person who
is agreeable will be able to handle the persuasion game more easily than a person who is not agreeable. In the
following steps, we will discuss ways to promote yourself and how to improve your standing in society.

Being Attractive: Studies have shown that people's brains react differently when making eye contact with an
attractive or beautiful person. The brain responds with a burst of activity that causes it to go through a slight
whirlwind of activity. Scientists have called this mental response "the social gift." This is in no way a sexual
response, but rather an unconscious response of the viewer feeling as if they have been chosen,
accepted into the social circle. As a persuader, you should focus on your own appeal and how you can use that
to your advantage to achieve your ultimate goal. Before we go any further, what needs to be addressed is that
everyone can be attractive. Only a small modification in style and wardrobe is needed. This step doesn't
mean eliminating your old style, but rather using elements of that style to gain an air of confidence. For example, if
you like to wear sweatpants, find a style option that exudes relaxation (i.e. a long maxi dress or linen pants), but still
makes you feel more attractive and comfortable in social situations. It's also important to find out which style
works best for your body type. If you're not sure how to control your style, try the many online mail-order programs
that pair you with a stylist for a small fee. If you can't afford a stylist online, start researching how to find the right
style for you. This will take effort, but in the end, it will add to your persuasion game. For this step, remember that
it is not about reviewing who you are, but about improving the elements that hinder your attractiveness. Don't
believe the lie that only some people can be attractive. Everyone can be attractive. It involves finding what makes
you feel secure and radiating that confidence. The attractiveness is not only external, but also internal.

The History of Q: Now let's focus on the history of Q and his promotion plans. Q has already taken control
of his personality, but now it's time to focus on his appearance. Q isn't an unattractive man, but he tends to
wear baggy suits from when he was thirty pounds heavier. He doesn't realize it, but uses the extra material to
hide his own insecurities about her body. It still feels like the beefy guy on the playground didn't get picked for
kickball. Q doesn't have time to worry about her hair either. Typically, you wake up, take a shower, and
let your hair dry naturally, allowing natural cowlicks to form. Q needs to get over her insecurities and find ways to
improve her attractiveness. Q notices that the other candidates for the promotion are wearing tight suits that
highlight their natural shape, and notices that their hair is not wild and is all over the place. Q decides to buy a
new, better-fitting suit and hair wax to calm his hair. The next day he enters the office and is greeted with
looks of acceptance and smiles. These reactions give him a boost of confidence, which only motivates him to fight
harder for the promotion.
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Fight Boredom: People get bored easily. With our continued addiction to social media, streaming sites and
entertainment, we are constantly being bombarded with information. Our attention span has fallen by the
wayside and we prefer short bursts of information where there is something to hold our attention. One may ask,
"How can I commit?" which is an important question to ask, but one that can be answered. Referring to our social
attention time, one should focus on not being boring. Sometimes we can't help but be boring, especially if the other
party has no interest in what we are talking about or we think we are being boring, because the other person is
looking at their phone or their eyes are dancing around the room. To avoid being boring, think about the
way you deliver messages or information to others. Are your stories long to the wind with little to no punch
of humor or drama? Do you tell stories related only to you and not to anyone around you? People like
short and sweet stories that leave them wanting more. Find ways to practice your stories in social situations and
find ways to amplify them and make them engaging. Also, when you talk to others, mirror their gestures. As
mentioned in the section on body language, if people don't relate to you, mirroring them will take them into account.
Also, be sure to ask the other person open-ended questions where you can openly talk about who they are.
People like to talk about themselves. Find ways to be a bit mysterious in your interactions with others. Do not
go into full details about yourself. Instead, give them enough that they want to ask questions and want to know
more. This tactic helps lay the groundwork for mind manipulation because it has already infiltrated the other
person's mind. They want to know more about you, which is not something anyone would do if they weren't
interested.

Q's Story: Q has treated himself to a sexy new wardrobe and noticed that people treat him very differently.
Many coworkers have said that they like the changes happening at Q and that the promotion committee would
be stupid to pass up a candidate like Q. But slowly, Q notices that his coworkers don't stick around to talk to him
for a long time. They tend to find ways to drop out of the conversation or appear uninterested in their stories.
Q begins to listen to himself and talk to others and notices that he is long and sloppy in his speech. Over
the next few days, Q begins to take notes of every social situation he finds himself in and then begins to adapt his
speech to each situation. He has noticed that now he is the one leaving the conversations and he is the
one in control. You have effectively redesigned the way you talk to others to make them see you for what you
are, an interesting and attractive person.

Have a Sense of Humor: The next step in marketing is to not take everything so seriously. Don't be afraid to laugh
at your mistakes and show others that you are just like them. People respect those who are not afraid to confess
their flaws, and ultimately those close to them will see it as a strength and be attracted to it. We all like to laugh too,
so finding a good sense of humor is very helpful in social situations. Adapt your quips to fit the social situation you
find yourself in.
For example, one would not tell the "aristocrats" joke to a class of fifth graders, because not only would it get
bombed, but the person telling it could be arrested. Being able to use your sense of humor to connect with
those around you and show them your human qualities is a solid quality to have in the manipulation process.

Q's Story: Q has become a very influential person in his office over the past few weeks.
People smile when they walk into a room and find that people are more attracted to them.
But today, when Q walks into the office, he accidentally spills his coffee on his new suit. Everyone in the office
sees this. Embarrassed, Q sheepishly runs to the bathroom, apologizing as he does so. When
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comes back from the bathroom, one of his office mates made a joke about how clumsy Q is. Q, instead of reacting
negatively to the comment, laughs and agrees. He adds to the joke until his office mate laughs with him. Q has
taken something that is embarrassing and disempowered his office mate.
When someone makes a joke against you, don't let them have the power in the situation. Agree with them and
let them know that you can see their flaws or mistakes and laugh. After all, we are all human and we all make
mistakes. As Q laughs with his office mate, one of the hiring committee members walks by and asks him
what's going on. Q impresses him with his carefree attitude and his ability to ignore the things in life that
don't matter. This was an opportunity that Q identified and used for his improvement.

Self-sustaining: People are attracted to those who can help themselves, those who can navigate life without
much help from others. Others envy this trait. They want this trait, but more importantly, they want to connect with
people who have it. People value connections with self-sufficient people because if they are asked to help the
other person, they feel honored to be able to help someone who rarely asks for help. This gives the person
an extra boost of confidence and a stronger connection to the self-sufficient person. To become a self-sufficient
person, start finding ways to control all aspects of your life. If you are one of those who has a closed circle of
friends who constantly help you, try to relax and handle situations on your own. Don't cut them out of your life,
but know that you are capable of handling situations yourself. If you are already self-sufficient, start using that to
your advantage.

Q's Story: Q has proven to be attractive, friendly, funny and an important guy in the office. He must show his
co-workers that he is self-sufficient. Q is asked to do an important project, which he has a lot of experience
working on. Other coworkers ask if he needs help, but he always answers confidently and shows them that
he is capable. He makes sure to thank them for the offer and tell them that it means a lot to him. This
creates a stronger bond between Q and his coworkers. As the project continues, you notice that the assistant of
one of the committee members has taken note of your work. Q has already made a connection with the assistant,
so he goes to the assistant and asks if he can get a clear view of his project. The assistant feels special to be
consulted about such an important project and Q knows it. You can use this to your advantage, because not only
have you found a way to get close to a committee member, but you also have another coworker who seems to be
impressed by your actions. This is power.

Have Your Own Brand: You have probably seen brands of your favorite fast food restaurant throughout your
life. Branding means taking a symbol and using it to remind the public that this symbol represents you. For
example, McDonald's uses the Golden Arches to brand its restaurant. All over the world, if someone sees golden
arches, they think of McDonald's. Branding yourself means finding symbols that make other people think of
you. These symbols can be anything from phrases to actual objects. Choose something that has importance and
also promotes a positive reaction toward the other party. What is important to remember is that whatever is
chosen for the brand, it should be something that can be easily incorporated into the person's life. For
example, if you want a person to think about you when you're not around them, give them a fun keychain or a
lighter. Something small, but still something the other person will keep on their person throughout the day.
Even when you're not around, just looking at the object will make the other person think of you.
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The Story of Q: Let's focus on our friend Q and see the ways in which he began to mark himself in the office.
To begin with, Q has begun using uplifting and inspirational sayings in his work with others.
They go around the office like "Qism." Every time someone uses one, they think about Q and the positive jobs
he's doing around the office. During the last office retreat, Q even purchased each worker's coffee mugs with
one of his inspirational sayings. He has effectively incorporated himself into the inner workings of the office by
using his sayings to gain influence. Q hasn't approached this in a way that is annoying to others, but in a way
that is helpful to those he works with. He has presented an engaging personality that only promotes
positivity throughout the office. He has managed to effectively work his way into the minds of everyone he
works with using minor mental manipulation tactics.

Step #3: Respect Self – To expand on the first two steps, one person cannot persuade another unless there is
some form of respect in the equation. The persuader must respect who they are and where they come from
before they can effectively manipulate another person. The person being persuaded also needs to have
some form of respect for the persuader, whether it be respect for their actions, personality, or social proof.
Remember a time in your life when you were interacting with someone you didn't respect for their character
or who they were. Everything they said you would question or dismiss because in your opinion it was not important.
He saw no value in this person. Everything they said was nonsense and had no impact on you or your environment.
Now think about a person you respect in your life and the qualities they have. What are those qualities?
Are they loyalty, honesty or could they be ruthless and cunning? Are these qualities you already have?

Qualities: The first step in self-respect is to outline the qualities of others you respect. Are these qualities what you
already have or are they what you want? For example, let's say you respect one of your teachers for his ability
to walk into any room and get everyone's attention. She doesn't have to talk. All you do is walk into the room,
keep your head up, and focus your attention on the task at hand. It's her body language and presentation that
makes everyone in the room turn to her. People in the room will even stop talking when you open the door. You
don't have to tell them to shut up, they already know that just by looking at your body language. If you want to
have this quality, the best option is to observe it in action. How does she support herself? How does she interact
with others?
Slowly begin to incorporate those qualities into your daily life. Or you may find that you respect someone who is
talented in a certain area of performance art. What you respect is not necessarily the performance art, but the
talent. What are you talented in? Do you have a talent for making people feel comfortable? Or do you have a
talent for building things? Find what you are talented at and use it to your advantage.

Q's Story: Q has reached a point in his fight for the promotion where he has gained a lot of positive leeway. He
still feels like he can do more in the situation. One night, Q sits down and writes down the qualities he respects in
other people. The two descriptive words he circulates are the words: cunning and vigilant. Q thinks of the CEO
of his company when he writes these two words. The CEO has proven that he is astute when it comes to
business, however, he is vigilant to ensure that the right decisions are made. Q then thinks of ways that have
demonstrated these qualities in their functioning. He realized that in the last few weeks, he changed his
presentation and ultimately changed others' perceptions of him to get something he wants. This is a sign of cunning.
Q is also careful not to be too manipulative in his interactions because he doesn't want to be
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discover. Q realizes that the qualities he respects most are qualities he already possesses. This will increase
Q's self-esteem, which is important when using manipulation tactics.

Be Honest With Yourself: This is important to respect yourself because you have to be honest with yourself not
only with your good qualities but also with your negative qualities. We all have flaws that we can improve. A
person cannot respect himself if he does not constantly find ways to improve his weaknesses. Don't lie to yourself
and tell yourself that you are perfect because perfection is not achievable, but the illusion of perfection is. In
social situations, don't be afraid of being corrected if you're wrong. If someone corrects you, thank them and move
on. This character trait will allow others to see that you are open to change and not cling to beliefs or ideas that
are not valid. Self-actualization can only be achieved if we constantly work to improve who we are. People will
see the change in you and be more likely to want you in their lives.

Q's Story: Looking back on Q, he has already slowly started to reinvent himself, but realizes that he tends to
take things too personally when interacting with others. He doesn't show that he's offended or hurt, but he does, and
his old neurotic tendencies rear their ugly head. Q is aware of this and begins to change the way he thinks and
reacts to others. He begins to realize that not everything is an attack directed at him, and if it is, there is nothing
he can do to stop it, but there is something he can do to deal with it. You can look at the negative and see if it's a
valid concern or one motivated by someone else's pettiness. If valid then this can help Q be more honest
with himself, if not then Q can ignore the negative.

Confidence in Decisions: No one likes a person who constantly changes their mind between decisions, as it shows
that they are indecisive and have no idea what they want in life. To respect yourself, you must be confident in your
decisions, even if those decisions go wrong. You made the choice, so there shouldn't be any second guessing.
Think about a time in your life when you were with a person who was indecisive about everything in their life.
You were probably exhausted from hanging out with them because their anxious energy was contagious. Now think
about a time when you were with someone who knew exactly what you wanted. They may have taken a moment
to think about the options, but once a decision was made, they stuck to their guns. Just like the energy of the
indecisive person, the energy of a decisive person is contagious. Their energy is more relaxed and
comforting, which makes interacting with them more intriguing than with someone who isn't. People are impressed
by those who can clearly make a decision because this shows that they are confident in their choices.
Confidence is something we all admire because we desperately want to be seen as confident. On the other
hand, those who tend to be more indecisive are easier to persuade. They just want someone to
tell them what to do.

Q's Story: As Q's journey continues, he notices that Bradley is rarely invited to lunch by his coworkers. Bradley is a
new employee, and everyone seems to like being around him, except during lunch meetings. Q eventually
asks one of his coworkers why Bradley isn't invited, and she comments, "I really don't know." Q suggests they
invite Bradley over, so he can see why people don't like being around him. As lunch begins, Q notices that
Bradley opens and closes his menu a total of ten times. Most people have already made up their minds,
but Bradley hasn't made up his mind yet. When the waiter stops by the table for the fifth time, everyone else
starts to order and Bradley waits until the end, still not entirely sure of his order. After lunch, Bradley can't decide if
he wants to take a cab.
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back to the office, the subway or traveling with one of the other co-workers. Q has already made the decision to
take a taxi back to the office, so he won't have to worry about traffic.

He sees Bradley's indecision as an opportunity to avoid traffic and get someone to share the fare with him. Q
tells Bradley that they will share a cab, and then he leads Bradley to the nearest cab. Bradley no longer has to
make the decision, so he sees Q's actions as helpful, which in turn will make Bradley respect Q's decisions. Q now
has a person in the office who will respond positively to any of the requests of Q. Bradley may even begin
to seek Q's opinion when making decisions. The important thing to remember about a persuasive relationship is
that they are everywhere, you just need to know how to identify them.

Overall, what is important to remember about self-respect is that it will take time and effort, especially if you suffer
from low self-esteem or self-esteem. Low self-esteem is not useful in any type of persuasive relationship. If you
constantly berate yourself and pick apart your weaknesses, you won't let yourself see the strengths you
have. Find out where this low self-esteem started and solve these problems. If you were bullied at school and
told you were ugly, stupid, or a slut, you should accept it and forget it. You shouldn't let other people define
who you are and what you do in your life. Once you come to terms with that, you will be more self-aware and
in control. People want to be surrounded by those who love themselves. Now, when I say love, I don't mean self-
absorbed, because no one likes a selfish, narcissistic personality. Those personality types can persuade, but after
a while, those who are being manipulated figure it out because a self-absorbed person refuses to evolve and
change for the better. If you don't respect who you are, how do you expect someone you're trying to persuade
to respect you?

Step #4: Incorporate: The next step in this process is to incorporate yourself into the life of the persuadee.
This does not mean stalking or harassing the persuaded, but putting yourself in a place of trust in their life. They
need to see you as someone trustworthy and respectable, and someone they believe offers important advice. To
put yourself in their life, you need to slowly build a bond with them. This bond does not have to be a friendship or
a close relationship, but there needs to be a connection. For example, if you're trying to get a new job, you
can make a connection with someone who already works there. You can use this connection to stay in touch with
new job openings or how the company is run. You can use your friendship to get a first-hand explanation of the
inner workings, so if an opening becomes available, you already have a reference and a basic understanding
of how the company works. In order to incorporate yourself into another person's life you must first learn
about that person and who they are. If you've already gone through the steps above, you should be able to
present yourself as a nice, level-headed, and respectable personality. You need to make sure that the other party
is comfortable with you becoming a part of their life. They should not feel threatened by your advances. If they do,
they'll drop out, and you'll have to start over to build their confidence.

Make the Connection: The first step in this process is to establish a connection with the person. If you already
have a goal in mind (i.e. getting a better rental rate), you'll know who to approach. So, let's say you know a
new department is opening in your building. You have seen the apartment and you know that it is larger than yours
and that it is less expensive because the previous owner is renting it.
You should establish an easy connection with the salesperson, casually greeting them in the hallway. If they
are carrying groceries up the stairs, be prepared to help them. If you have a meeting in your department,
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invite them. Make sure they feel connected to you in a genuine way. If you are a nice person, you are better
equipped to persuade and get that apartment. Keep in mind that you should not force the connection, as forcing
the connection will only make it harder for you to use your manipulation skills to get what you want. If a person
doesn't trust you, they will just ignore what you are trying to do.

Control the Connection: Once the connection has been established, it is up to you to control where the relationship
will go. If you want this relationship to be one where the other person feels obligated to help you, be sure
to offer them something they need, like help moving or even help with money. If they feel like they owe you
something, they will be more willing to follow along with you. Make sure the other person is comfortable in
this connection as well. Don't let them see your hidden agenda or it will scare them. The important thing to
remember is that you are presenting them with something they want or need. They must think this is what they
want, not what you want. For example, if you are trying to sell something to another party and they have already
proven that you need it, you can use that to your advantage and get the best deal possible. If you're selling an old
sofa, take flattering photos and use descriptive words that make them want to buy the product.
Remind them that you both need something: you need the couch and you need to get rid of it. Make them
believe that they are doing you a favor. That is the basis of all persuasive techniques. You make the other
person believe that they are doing well and receive all the benefits. Scam control that aspect of the connection,
and you can easily manipulate the situation in your favor.

Control every aspect of the situation by successfully anticipating the other party's move. You do this by
understanding their personality trait (openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism).
For example, if you are trying to control the connection of a person who is nice, you know that they are
empathetic. Use it to your advantage by making an emotional appeal to them. Make them feel for you, so you
can use this trait to get what you want. If they tend to be more neurotic, play on their fears to get what you want.
Don't make them feel unhealthy, let them know that their fears are valid and give them a solution to overcome
or protect them from these fears.

Gain Trust: An important part of persuasion is gaining the other person's trust.
You can gain confidence by going through what some may call "social hoops." Social rings are the little tests we
all give people to prove their character. These social rings can be tests that we actively create or that are created
organically. For example, if someone is going through a stressful situation, they are more inclined to trust someone
who knows how to get through the situation without losing focus and becoming a rat in a cage, running around
without clear direction. We unconsciously take their reactions and store them in our minds to remind us of their
weakness. You gain trust with the other person by making it through these social rings. If you follow the steps
included in the previous chapters, you should be able to easily jump through these hoops. The important thing
to remember is that these tests are out there, and you need to be on your feet to make sure you're prepared for
whatever they throw at you.

You can also gain a person's trust by avoiding any kind of abusive or negative communication. When a person
is interacting with you and they notice that you become defensive and attack when another party asks
probing questions, this can be a red flag to the other party. They will slowly equate your character with one who
gets angry quickly and another who they don't want in their life. Make sure you control the way you speak to others.
Refrain from being defensive if someone says something you don't agree with or if they say something that you
feel is a personal attack.
Now that doesn't mean you can't defend yourself when you're verbally attacked, it does mean you need to stay
calm and not become a negative force in the conversation. Another way to earn
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A person's trust is keeping their secrets. If they share important and confidential information with you, do not
share it. Let them know that what they have to say will keep it between the two of you. If a person sees that they
can share something with you, they will be more willing to share secrets with you.
Make sure you do this in every relationship you are in because if they realize you share other secrets,
they will be less likely to share their secrets with you.

Ask Questions: As simple as this step is, it is very important in this process of entering another person's life.
People like to talk about themselves, so when you're trying to make this connection, learn as much as you can
about the other person. Let them share their life experiences with you and make sure you give them your full
attention. Make sure you handle it in a way that doesn't feel like a fact-finding mission, but rather an honest
conversation. People, if they feel comfortable, will be more open about who they are. If they ask you questions,
be sure to answer them, because this back and forth will create a stronger bond between the two of you. Both
of you will begin to see the things you have in common and the traits you don't. Asking questions can also
help you identify what kinds of personality traits they have, so you can better tailor your persuasion plan to
suit how your mind works.

Find Your Circle: Another way to incorporate yourself into another person's life is to find their circle. This
means that you will meet their friends or go to places that you know they like to hang out. This does not mean
stalking this person, but rather having a better understanding of who they are. Find ways to organically connect
with your circle. If you know that this person and their friends like to walk and run, start finding time to go
for a walk and enjoy the activity. This will help you when you connect with them. Remember not to be too
enthusiastic in your connections. Don't go to their normal hangouts when you know they'll be there, just go on
your own time to find out why they like being in such a place. If this is a place they visit frequently, there is a good
chance that you will come across them naturally. If you see them, stay away from them. Let them see you and
let them make the connection. Don't get aggressive because that is borderline bullying and stalking is not what
you are trying to achieve here.
You are trying to improve yourself by using persuasive techniques to help you advance in the world, not hurt
another human being.

Use Social Media: Social media, as discussed earlier in the text, is a great way to make connections with
those around you. If you know the person has a social media account, add them as a friend. Make sure you don't
waste hours on their profile and comment on everything they post. This will automatically raise red flags and
the connection will be dropped easily. Social media will give you a little more information about the person's
personality, so you can use that information for your ultimate goal, whatever that may be. Social media tends to
be a place where people present their best possible version of self, so keep in mind that what they are presenting
may not be the absolute truth. Even if that's the case, you've still entered a small part of their life. Again, don't
use social media to harass the other person, because that is not the way to persuade someone. If you become
obsessed with the other person, you will have to stop doing what you are doing, because you are losing focus on
what you are trying to achieve. Obsession is a negative trait when it comes to mental manipulation
because you are no longer aware of yourself. You are so focused on the other person that your mind
becomes clouded and you are not able to persuade effectively.

Q's Story: Throughout the last few chapters, Q has been slowly gaining power over those in his office, but he
has yet to establish a connection with the person who has the authority to decide.
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about promotion: Q's boss. Those on the hiring committee have a say in who gets hired, but the final decision is
made by Q's boss. Q, as mentioned above, has worked at the company for last ten years. He has basically remained
under the radar until the last few months when he decided he wanted this promotion. Unknown to Boss Q has
slowly been manipulating his way in his life. He started slowly by improving himself and creating stronger bonds with
his coworkers. Everyone in the office sees Q as a respectable man, who has a good head on his shoulders. Q's boss
has noticed this change and has begun to realize that perhaps he was wrong about Q and should reevaluate his
original thoughts about the man. Before this point, the boss believed that Q was just another worker bee
who was happy to do enough to survive. Now the boss can see that Q is a dedicated individual who has
the ability to adapt when necessary. Q was able to use persuasive techniques without even talking to his boss. The
boss observed the positive changes he was making in life, and through those actions, Q's boss's outlook
completely changed. This is something important to keep in mind during this process. Others will observe the change
in you and their ways of thinking about you will change.

You may not even talk to those people, but they see your actions and can tell by those actions what kind of person
you really are.

Now, Q can join the bosses' lives by making appointments with the boss to discuss projects.
These meetings may start out as business, but then Q can observe the bosses' office to better understand who he
is. Q might notice that the boss is interested in sailing. At the next meeting, Q can casually comment on his knowledge
of navigation. This will make the boss more interested in learning more about Q. The important thing Q needs to
remember if he is not an expert on a topic, he should be open about it. If Q learned how to sail from Wikipedia, he
should mention that he's always wanted to sail more, but he doesn't have the time or the boat. If Q has successfully
created a strong bond with the boss, the boss might mention that he does have a boat and would love for Q to join him
for a weekend. This is a great opportunity to talk to the boss outside of the workplace. It is important to interact with the
person you are persuading outside of their normal environment. If they are coworkers, find a way to hang out with
them outside of work. People generally let their guard down when they are not at work. If you usually see the person
you want to persuade at a bar, try meeting them at a coffee shop or in a park. Choose a place that is not noisy and
gives you the opportunity to talk to him one on one. When persuading a person, it is important to find ways to be alone
with them in public places. They won't feel threatened, and they won't feel like you're trying to get something from
them.

Step #5: Adapt – If you have successfully followed the last few steps, then this step should be simple to follow.
You've already become more aware of your social interactions and your surroundings, so you have the skills
to persuade someone and manipulate their mind. Once you have become fully aware of your own
environment, you can use it to your advantage by tailoring your response in certain situations by considering the many
outside sources that can shape your environment. Adapting to yourself means being able to change and shape your
reaction to those specific situations and use those reactions to control the reactions of those around you.

For example, let's say you get into an argument with a friend. The friend is obviously upset and starts yelling and
acting out, throwing insults his way trying to get a reaction. One way you can handle this is to respond with anger
which in most cases will escalate the situation into something more serious. Or you can take control of your
emotions and respond with silence and show no reaction at all. Your friend will become confused and this
confusion will begin to decrease his
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anger. They will see your calm as something unexpected, a response they were not fully prepared for. Your
calmness will reveal to them how inappropriate and childish your anger is in this situation. Soon, your friend will
start to calm down because he won't get the reaction he wants from you. Stay calm and turn the situation in your
favor. Speak slowly and quietly so that they are more willing to listen to everything you have to say. In this
situation, you adapted a normal response of anger and changed it to your advantage. In interactions with others,
start taking note of how they present themselves and try to adapt to that situation as you see fit. This will take time
and effort, but if you follow the rules below, you will find that adjusting yourself will start to become easier.

Observe Social Cues: We should all be aware of the social cues that people use to interact with others. Everyone
has certain ways of showing that they are not interested in interacting with you. Some may answer your
questions in short answers, letting you know they are not interested in this conversation. If you are faced with
someone who refuses to engage in conversation with you, you should adapt that conversation to something that
may be more interesting. For example, if you're at a work party and you're talking to a boss who you know doesn't
appreciate you, find ways to praise them and present positive energy. You can personalize any conversation
to regain control by being aware of your audience. In conversations with people, be aware of where they place
your eye contact. People use their eyes to express their message, even if they are not aware of that fact.

For example, have you ever been in a conversation with someone and their eyes are not focused on you, but on
everything else in the room? They may find someone who they feel is more interesting than you to talk to or even
just want to get out of this conversation. Most people will look past this and continue talking without the other party
committing.

If you notice that someone isn't paying attention to you, find a way to bring them back into the
conversation. Watch where your eyes go and respond to that. If you look at another person, comment on that other
person. Do it in a way that doesn't call out to the other person, but reminds them that they're having a
conversation with you. Show confidence in who you are and let them understand that their time is
important and what you have to say is important. You can also leave them out of the conversation by
commenting on how they are focused on something else and you don't want to keep them. This tactic will cause
the other person to feel guilty for making you feel uninterested or uncomfortable. If blame is brought into the
situation, the other person will be more compelled to stick around and continue the conversation. Always look
for ways to use social cues to your advantage and tailor your response to fit the best outcome for you.

As mentioned in previous chapters, body language is an extremely important indicator of what the other
party is trying to communicate. Dissect their body language to better understand how they feel in a certain
situation. Do they feel uncomfortable talking to you? If so, how can you make them feel more comfortable in this
situation? Never corner a person, because most people when cornered will panic and find a way to excuse
themselves from the situation. When trying to persuade, you should never use intimidation tactics to get what you
want. You are welcome to use your confidence, but there is a big difference between showing your
confidence and intimidating the other party. Those who are intimidated will react with fear to the persuader.
Fear should only be used to focus on an external source, not the persuader, because the person will not trust
the persuader if they are afraid of them.
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Self-monitoring and Social Control: Remember the social commitments you have recently had. Were you
the one monitoring how you reacted or entered the situation saying and doing what you wanted? Sometimes that
can be okay, but if you want to be taken seriously, you need to monitor what you do to make sure you don't
present yourself in a negative light. Think about a social gathering at a bar. Who do you remember negatively?
Was it the woman who had too many daisies and became belligerent and annoying? Did she give up
normal social cues and set out to have as much fun as possible, ignoring whether she was being rude or not?
That woman left a negative presentation of herself in your mind. If you have other interactions with her after
this point, you still have that original impression of her in your mind.
Always be mindful of how you portray yourself to others. Self-monitoring does not mean falling back into the
crowd and being ignored, but rather being aware of how you can positively affect the situation. Always
remember, don't forget in a social situation. There's nothing worse than talking to a person you've interacted with
before and they don't even remember you. You can make yourself memorable by doing positive things. For
example, let's focus on the woman who drank too much. You can have a positive impact on others at the bar
by taking responsibility for calming down the drunk woman so others can have fun.
You can convince her to take a taxi and get some sleep. If others see that you are not taking
advantage of this woman and that your purpose is to take care of her, people will think highly of it. In this case,
you have successfully monitored people's reactions to you, taking the positive approach. In every social situation
you find yourself in, take note of who is there and where the event is taking place. If the event is held at a
friend's barbecue, you can let your guard down and have fun. He tends to use phrases and words that are more
relaxed and carefree. If the event is a work event where you know it will be your coworkers and bosses, introduce
yourself in a respectful yet jovial manner. Have fun, but also realize that what you say and what you do can
negatively affect your work life.
Always be in control of yourself, because if you are, people are more inclined to be attracted to you, because
they will see you as a balanced person who does not have extreme personality traits.

When focusing on social control, we need to look at how you can control what happens during social
interactions, not only your own but also those of those around you. You must control yourself in social
commitments. You need to make sure that you are adapting to whatever social situation you find yourself in. Social
control is a term used in sociology, which means how we are controlled by the society around us. It focuses not
only on the internal aspects of socialization (feelings and thoughts) but also on the external ones
(government). For the sake of our argument, we will focus on the internal aspects of social control. A sanction
that is used is called reward and punishment. In persuasion, this can be very useful because a person will
feel the need to work hard to get a reward from you and not a punishment. For example, let's say you're trying to
persuade a friend to help you move. The reward you can offer is to take that friend out for drinks and dinner, but if
they refuse to help you, you can slowly withdraw from that person. You can show them that their negative actions
towards you will result in punishment. This punishment will only work if you have already set that person up as
someone they need in their life. If you punish, make sure it is not obvious, or else they will respond angrily.
Don't use punishment as a way to negatively enforce the relationship, but use it as a way to strengthen the
relationship. If the other party realizes that their time and effort is important, they will follow suit in that way of
thinking.

Q's Story: Over the past few steps, Q has slowly changed the environment of his mind and office. Originally, Q
was a person who ran from fear and seemed forgotten by his coworkers. Now he has found a way to engage
with those around him and become a respected figure. Q has started to adjust to situations with everyone in the
office. When Q interacts
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With someone on the promotion committee, you are respectful and make sure they don't mention promotion,
because you don't want the member to see your ulterior motives for making the connection. Instead, Q creates a
friendly connection with the person who talks about their interests or what projects Q might be working on at the
moment. Q has created a strong bond with one of the members of the promotion committee. This member
has started going out of his way to talk to Q at least once a day. Q realized this and began incorporating a reward
and punishment system. Q sees the committee member's weakness in continuing this connection with Q, so
now he can use this information to help him get what he wants. If Q sees that the committee member is getting
closer to the other candidates, he can start to move away from the other member. He may say that he is busy
or not ready for a conversation right now. Slowly but surely this tactic will work. Unknown to the committee
member, Q is using subliminal tactics that make the committee member trust Q's friendship. The committee
member has noticed that more people in the office find him more respectful because he is in a relationship
with Q. Q , in this situation, you need to make sure that you are available only when you want to be available.
This will make the committee member realize that Q considers his time important, so if he talks to the
member, the member feels he is important because Q gives him time.

Now, let's focus on how Q has learned about control of a situation by focusing on a business dinner with a few
clients and another coworker named Stephen (who is also up for the promotion). Q should enter this
situation focusing on how he can present himself in an attractive way. Since you've now taken control of your style
and personality traits, you'll be able to enter the meeting in a calm and informal manner. Stephen, a competitor in
the promotion, is a good person, but Q has noticed that Stephen is an extrovert. Stephen likes to be the center
of attention and usually tries to direct the conversation towards him and his life. Stephen has had an interesting
life, but most people find his conversation tiring and slightly annoying. He doesn't understand social
input and tends to talk over other people.

This business dinner, Q knows, will be a challenge. To start, Q should arrive at the restaurant first, making
sure he is the one to greet the customers and Stephen. This shows the clients and Stephen that he is in control of
this social situation. If Q notices that Stephen has finished the conversation, Q should politely interrupt and
mention that there are other people at the table who would like to talk.
You should handle this situation in a humorous way, but in a way that lets Stephen know that his actions are not
welcome at the table. If he tries to pick up the conversation, Q should pull Stephen aside for a quick chat and let
him know how his actions are affecting the overall dinner. If Stephen responds angrily, Q should not show any
signs of retaliation. You should stay calm and let Stephen know that his anger is not appreciated. The important
thing is that Q needs to be in control. If an extravert notices that his tactics are not appreciated or noticed,
he will respond in one of two ways.
Stephen could react negatively and proceed to increase his extroversion, which would essentially interrupt the
dinner and let the customers see how unprofessional he was, or he could calmly respond by letting Q
take control of the dinner. Either outcome of this situation is positive for Q because it has had a positive impact
on customers.

The important thing to remember in this step is to stay in control. If you have followed the last few steps, you
should be able to adapt effectively in any social situation. Once you are in full control of the way you think and
the way you respond, you are more prepared to use persuasive techniques in every social situation you find
yourself in. Consider your environment, because that environment should
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dictate how it is presented. If you are in control of yourself, then no outside source can dictate what you do or
where you go. Remember, you want to be the controlling factor of others, not the factor being controlled.

Step #6: Control Emotions: Throughout the last few steps, we have discussed how a person can use persuasion
effectively to acquire a target, focusing on personality control and also external appearance. The last
step, and one of the most important, is to control your emotions. As mentioned throughout this chapter, an
effective persuader is one who has control over every aspect of the self. Emotions, being a part that can
hinder the process, are a facet of the self in which the persuader needs to have the most control. If you are
aware of your emotions and how you can control them and use them to strengthen your persuasive techniques,
you will find it much easier to dictate the emotions of others. In this final step, we will focus on how you can use
your emotional intelligence to gain the skills necessary to manipulate the mind of anyone you encounter.

Emotional Intelligence: In 1995, a New York Times science journalist by the name of Daniel Goleman
expanded on the concept of emotional intelligence in his book called Emotional Intelligence. Although the concept
of emotional intelligence had been around since the mid-1960s, this was the first text to dive into the complexities
of how individuals can control their emotions and use them for a better self. Emotional intelligence is the
ability to not only understand and control your emotions, but also those of others. A person with high emotional
intelligence is able to discern different emotions and label them to help guide their behavior and thinking.
Over the years, there have been many disagreements about what exactly emotional intelligence is,
but there is agreement on its three basic models. Through the writings of Goleman and others, emotional
intelligence has been divided into three models: ability, mix, and trait.

Ability: In this model, emotional intelligence is a person's ability to perceive and discuss emotions and use
them to improve the way a person thinks. Those who have the ability are labeled as empaths. An empath
is a person with the ability to identify emotions not only in themselves but also in the people around them. They
connect with other people's emotions because they understand them. The capability model is divided into four
different categories: perceiving, using, understanding, and managing. Perceiving is the person's ability to identify
a certain emotion, not only in themselves but also in others. For example, let's say you're waiting in line
for a cup of coffee. The line is out. Notice that the woman in front of you has tension in her shoulders and
crosses her arms. Occasionally he lets out a frustrated sigh. Without her, even speaking, you can see her body
language and vocal cues to say that she's angry about the situation. This shows your ability to perceive and
then label their emotion.

The next category is using emotion. This is a person's ability to understand that our emotions will change in every
situation we are in and how we can harness those energies to strengthen our speech.

To elaborate, let's say you're still waiting in line for that cup of coffee. You've already identified that the woman
across from you is upset, but you still feel very calm about the matter because you know this is a popular
coffee shop and the lines are a given. The woman turns to you and makes a negative response about waiting. You
already know that she is angry and you do not want to aggravate the
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situation, because having an argument with a middle-aged woman in a coffee line is not the best way to start the
day. Since you have already identified that she is angry, you can respond in the same way. Tell him you
understand his discomfort, but share that you know this coffee is worth the wait. She calms down slowly and due
to her reaction to his anger and the use of her own emotion, the situation is back under her control.

The third concept, understanding, is the ability to understand that emotions will evolve over time. The person must
be in complete control of their emotions to use this concept. Returning to the cafeteria, the woman is no longer
angry and is happy to wait. She turns around and you notice that her body language has changed. Now he feels
happy that he was able to save a high school barista from the angry words of a nervous middle-aged woman.
In this situation, the emotions changed and now affect all aspects of the person. The woman is no
longer full of tension, and now you are glad that you no longer have to deal with her anger. This reveals the
last concept, which is management. In this situation, you were able to handle, not only your emotions, but the
woman standing in front of you. You observed the situation and used that information about the emotion to keep
the situation under control. These techniques can be used in the persuasion process because if you have a solid
understanding of how your emotions affect others and how their emotions affect you, you are one step ahead in
manipulating their mind.

Mixed: The mixed model of emotional intelligence is one created by Daniel Goleman in his text. In his writing,
he separates people's emotional intelligence into five categories: self-awareness, self-regulation,
social skills, empathy, and motivation. Self-awareness is a person's ability to know their emotional strengths
and weaknesses. Like the previous step in this chapter on understanding your personality strengths and
weaknesses, understanding your emotions will also help in the persuasion game. By understanding how you
emotionally react to external factors, you will be able to control those responses. For example, if you know that
interacting with a certain person causes you anger, you are primed for that emotion. You can start slowly by
finding ways to control that angry emotion. Find the root of the problem and face it head on. Once you do
that, you have followed the second category listed which is self-regulation. You have controlled that negative
emotion and removed it from the situation.

The following two aspects can go hand in hand in the persuasive process. Social skill is your ability to
navigate through any social engagements you may have. If you have followed the steps so far, you should have
very strong social skills. Now, empathy is the ability to read another person's emotions and relate to them.
Social skills and empathy work together because, since you are persuading, you not only need the skills to
communicate with the person, but you also need the emotional skills to read the other person. If you can read
another person's emotions, you can determine where the situation is going.

To expand, let's say you've recently been issued a parking ticket. The ticket explains that you must go to court
to pay it. You are obviously upset, but you control that emotion.
As you approach the employee, you can see that he obviously hasn't had a good day. He frowns as you
approach the desk. You can frown back, or you can take matters into your own hands. One way is to approach
her desk with a smile and then ask her how her day was. Most workers are surprised when legitimately
asked how they are doing because most people approach with an attitude.
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He starts to relax a little. He shares a little about his day and you can respond in kind. This opens a connection with him.
You have already created a positive connection. You may notice that you have a banner for a sports team on your desk,
you can comment on that. You need to build a real relationship with him. Don't go into the situation trying to get out of the
ticket. See interaction as a way to make another person feel like their time is important. Don't ask if he can take care of
your ticket. Instead, manipulate the conversation so that you want to take care of your ticket. If you present yourself in a
positive way, most people will do everything they can to help you. You must be open to these situations, because there
are many opportunities for you to receive something in return. Persuasion is about presentation.

The last concept discussed is that of motivation. Motivation is what drives a person. In the situation above, your secret
motivation was to fix your ticket, but your presented motivation was to make the employee feel better about their
lousy day. In any situation, you may have multiple motivations, but the important thing is to know what those
motivations are before you begin. Once you know your motivation, you can use your emotions to support it.

Trait Model: The final model in emotional intelligence is the trait model. This focuses on a person's personality traits and
how they can learn to use their emotions. With reference to step no. you're an extrovert, your emotions probably run on
°
an 1, Focus on your personality traits and what emotions you are prone to. For example, yes
exaggerated scale. He tends to react bigger than most people because he has such a great personality. With the trait
model, your emotional intelligence comes from how you control those emotions. Again, it's important to understand
how your mind works before you can start manipulating the minds of others.

Now that we understand the different models used in emotional intelligence, we can begin to use emotions to persuade
others. As mentioned in previous chapters, anger can be a great emotion to use in mind manipulation. For example, you
can use anger to reveal to another person how important a situation is to you. If you use anger, never use violence. Just
let them know that you are having such a strong response because you feel deeply about what is happening.

You can also turn someone else's anger on their head by not responding or showing them that their anger is not justified.
Make them feel like their anger was misdirected and that they shouldn't have even responded the way they did. This will
make the person feel guilty about their emotional response. You can use this in your persuasive techniques because guilt
makes one person feel obligated to the other person. You may react hurt or confused by his anger. If they see they've
hurt you, they'll back off, and you'll be better equipped to manipulate their thinking.

What's important to remember is that you can't control another person's emotional response, but you can control how
their emotion is affecting the situation. You do this by controlling your response to your emotion. This takes practice, but
once you know your own emotional intelligence, you can use other people's emotions to your advantage. For example,
let's say one of your coworkers is upset about something you've done. They approach you with anger and annoyance.
You can control this situation by responding positively and apologizing. If they continue to be angry with you,
you can tell them that you have already done everything you can to rectify this problem and if they have a problem. If
they react with anger, just walk away, don't give them an answer. This will show others that you have handled
the situation maturely and that the other coworker is now considered unreasonable. This may have just been
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an interaction you had with the coworker, but as mentioned earlier in the text, your reaction has already imprinted
negatively on the minds of others. You have the power to do this if you can control your emotions effectively
in every situation you find yourself in.

Q's Story: Q has proven to be a loyal worker and a loyal friend to those in the office. He has become one of the
most respected individuals in the office. Now that you are in control of every aspect of your life, you can focus
on controlling your emotions. Q is now in the final stages of promotion. He confronts Stephen. Stephen, if you
remember, is the extrovert who ended up ruining dinner with the clients. Of course, Q is upset by this choice
because he believes that Stephen has not demonstrated the professionalism that Q has exhibited over the
past few weeks. Now, Q can use his anger to become petty and respond negatively. Let's say Q does this.

Everyone in the office notices that Q's demeanor has changed and every time he interacts with someone, he
has to share something negative about Stephen. This does not help your case at all. He is not in control of himself
and others can see that. Little by little he loses all the respect he worked so hard to earn. If Q decides to control his
emotions, he can use this to his advantage. For example, Q should make it his goal to interact with Stephen as
much as he can in the office.

If others see Stephen's exaggerated emotions compared to Q's controlled behavior, they will find Q more
respectable. Q won't even have to discuss his dislike for Stephen, but he can share with others how he
thinks Stephen's personality sometimes disrupts business meetings. Q should do this in a way that he is
speaking from a logical and not an emotional side. If he complains, others probably won't take what he's
saying seriously and think Q is weak. He can also control his emotions during the final interview. In the interview,
Q may be aware of the emotions that he needs to present for each of his answers. If you want to show the
promotion committee how dedicated you are to your work, you can change the inflection in your voice to show
passion.

People associate with those who show passion for something. We are drawn to those who seem to have a
clear motivation in life because we see them as strong individuals. Since Q has successfully used the steps
outlined in this chapter, he has just discovered that he has received the promotion. Q is now in a better place
mentally, emotionally, and financially, and can now use his title to persuade more people to help him get a higher
position in the company. Remember that in the game of persuasion, you should always find ways to improve your
social standing, because once you do that, you can manipulate the minds of more people. Be like Q and strive
to be better than you are.

Summary: Throughout this chapter, we have gained the skills and knowledge to use persuasive techniques in
any social situation we may encounter. We have focused on the importance of appearance and creating a persona
that people want to be present for. If you have a strong personality, you will be more easily accepted in society.
If you have strong social proof, you have a greater ability to persuade. We have also discussed how important it
is for one to be in control of not only how they think, but also how they respond, making sure that emotions
are kept in check. If you control your emotions, you will never be prepared for what happens in your life. Control is
the main component of mental manipulation. If you don't control who you are and how you react, you will
never be able to control those around you. You should now be more observant of emotional and mental
manipulation tactics in your daily life and be able to use those tactics to your advantage.
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own benefit. Persuasion is a process that requires time and a focused and dedicated mind. If you don't have a
focused mind, start taking control of it. Understand your own personality traits and emotional intelligence
so you can dictate what your mind does. You are in control of your mind. Nobody else. Don't let external
motivators reshape your mind, but use your own self-awareness to reshape the minds of others. Always focus on
ways to improve who you are and your social standing, so your persuasive voice reaches more people. If you
are not in a good social place, then move up or use the people around you to get to that state. In any relationship
you enter into, find a way to use that relationship to enhance your identity. If you are capable of this, you can use
someone for your own social well-being.

The important thing to remember about these persuasive techniques is that they will take time to master. We all
have weaknesses when it comes to being self-aware. Some are more aware than others, so they will be able
to understand these concepts more easily, and others may have difficulty getting through these steps. What you
need to keep in mind is that if you go through these steps, you will be able to manipulate the minds of anyone
you want. Hard work is worth it when the result can so easily change your life. Keep that in the back of your mind
as you incorporate these steps into your life. Don't be afraid to fail, because through failure you will be stronger
and more effective. Use your failures as references for what not to do on the next persuasive journey you may be
undertaking. Remember, you can achieve this by taking complete control of yourself, because once you
are in control, you will be unstoppable.
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Chapter 4: How to defend yourself against manipulators

Throughout this text we have discussed and defined how to use persuasive techniques to get ahead in life, but
now we will focus on how you can use your new knowledge to defend yourself and destroy those who try to
manipulate your ways of thinking. At this point, you should have a basic understanding of your personality traits,
and with that knowledge, you will be better equipped to handle yourself in any situation, setting, and
social environment. Always be aware and watch when you interact with others to avoid becoming a victim of
mind manipulation. You need to take into account everything about the other person: how they meet, how
they talk, and most importantly, how they interact with you and others. Throughout this chapter, we will
highlight and discuss ways to identify and destroy the manipulators in your life.

To get started, let's dig a little deeper into the definition of manipulation. Throughout this text, we have focused
more on persuasion and covert emotional techniques you can use to get what you want, but less on the tactics
found in manipulation. Manipulation is different from the concepts we have discussed because a manipulator only
wants one thing: absolute control over another person. In persuasion, the job is to make the other person believe
that they are coming to a conclusion on their own and not with outside help.

You are not forcing the person, but you are pushing them in the right direction. Usually in persuasion, when
you push a person, you are leading them to do something that is not meant to hurt them, but to help them. In
manipulation, a person is not pushed but led to the conclusion without any free will in the matter. Manipulation
may work for a while, but it doesn't have the same power as persuasion. In manipulation, the manipulated party
may realize over time that they are being controlled by an external factor. Once the manipulated person realizes
this, they are no longer under the control of the manipulator. In persuasion, the other party believes that what
they are doing is correct, because they feel they are in full control of the decision. That is the big difference between
persuasion and manipulation. Persuasion makes the other party believe that they are in complete control
and will not question your decision. Persuasion is more durable and will not crumble as manipulation tends
to over time. As we have discussed throughout this text, people with strong observation skills and self-awareness
are the most persuasive and also the strongest at avoiding manipulation.

They are in control of the situation because they see and are aware of all possible angles.

Body Language: Humans have the innate ability to read another person's body language without much
training. One study showed that humans, even without proper training in reading body language, can detect
the message being presented nearly half the time. Now, this doesn't sound like much, but it really is a great starting
point in your training to read body language. The thing to remember in this process is to trust your instincts in the
situation. You are equipped to do that job, but it is up to you to believe that you can do it.

Relaxation Pattern: Before we can dive into the signs of manipulation, we must first discuss how we can identify
when someone changes their emotions by using their body. What you need to focus on is what is called the
relaxation pattern. A relaxation pattern is how a person holds their body when they are relaxed and calm. A
person, when he is in his pattern of
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comfort, you will have no stress on your body and you will have a naturally open posture. Knowing a
person's relaxation pattern is important because you will be better equipped to know when they have a rapid
change in behavior. This is important in the handling process because if you are attentive enough, you will be able
to catch them in the act.

To start observing relaxation patterns, you need to start studying those around you. Look at your friends or family
members when they are in a quiet place. Look at your face first and see how each part of your face is positioned.
Did your eyes narrow? Do they blink less? Are your lips pursed? Then, move down your body and make a
mental note of what each body part looks like. Are your feet crossed? Are your shoulders slumped? Then go out
and watch people in public places. See how they react to their surroundings. To learn more, go to a bus stop and
observe those waiting. Find a person who looks comfortable and relaxed in their surroundings. You may be reading
a book or immersed in your own little world with your headphones. Notice how their body language changes when
they see the bus arrive. They can quickly throw their belongings into their bag and get up to walk to the bus.

While sitting, they must have had a relaxed position, perhaps shoulders slumped and head down. When the
bus arrives, they spring into action. His shoulders tense and his arms are held tight at his sides. They have gone
from relaxation to action. Try to find situations in which a person is comfortable and then you need to take
action quickly. How do their bodies change? Take note of the changes that occur. Also try to observe people
in situations where they may face high levels of stress. For example, watch the people waiting in a long line.
Notice how they can tense up when they see the possibility of someone trying to sneak in. Watch as they
quickly shift from a relaxed posture to one full of tension. The reaction may be minuscule, but if you take the time
and observe these reactions, you will be better prepared to read the body language of those around you.

Signs of Manipulation: Now that you understand relaxation patterns, you should be able to see when a person
moves from comfort to action. There are many different signs of manipulation that you should be aware of
when interacting with those around you. What you need to remember is to be very observant when interacting
with a person who you believe is trying to manipulate you. By considering their body language and vocal styles,
you should be better prepared to avoid being made a victim of manipulation.

Eye Contact: A person's eyes reveal a lot about who they are and what they are thinking. You can easily tell if
someone is trying to manipulate you by how they use their eyes. Manipulators tend to use eye contact as an
aggressive stance on the interaction. They will use their eye contact to make you feel uncomfortable or uneasy.
They won't break their eye contact with you, because they know it will make you uncomfortable with the
situation. Manipulators tend to stare at you too much and stare very intently when they are looking into your eyes.
Be aware of this, and even if it makes you uncomfortable, look back. Don't break eye contact with them so you can
let them know that you know exactly what they are doing. Even if it makes you uncomfortable, continue
eye contact. In the end, they will look the other way, because you have regained control of the situation. Manipulators
want to control and once they lose control, they will back off.
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Mirroring: As mentioned in previous chapters, mirroring another's gestures is useful in the persuasion
process. This is also the case when it comes to manipulation. Using mirroring calms the other party because their
movements are like ours, so we can read their body language since it is our body language. If you notice
someone mirroring your gestures, focus on ways to make them lose focus. Start changing your body language by
reacting differently than you normally would. If you tend to use a lot of hand gestures when speaking, hold
your hands at your sides and see if they do the same. If they do, you'll know they're trying to use your body language
against you. Always remember that if you can spot a handler early in your process, you will be better equipped
to shut them down before your plan even begins.

False Smile: Manipulators are cunning in the way they warp normal responses to get what they want. They
will take something as natural as a smile and turn it into something they can use to their advantage. Manipulators
will use fake smiles to make others feel comfortable around them. An unsuspecting person will look at that
smile and take it as genuine, but an observant person will easily detect that it is a fake smile. To differentiate
between a real smile and a fake smile, what gives it away are the eyes. When a person genuinely smiles, their
cheeks will wrinkle and lines will form around their eyes. These are so affectionately called smile lines, and they are
for a reason, and that is because they reveal whether or not a smile is real.

If you look at a person and they don't have smile lines, their smile is probably fake. Also, take a closer look at his
eyes and see if any emotion is found. You can see a fake smile if your eyes look dead, emotionless. At first glance,
you may not even notice it, but once you do, you can never ignore it.
Also, watch the corners of their mouths and see if they look relaxed or look forced and stiff. A real smile will be
motivated by real emotions, so a person's body will react accordingly. If there is no emotion, then the
manipulator must force his body to respond naturally, which makes the smile look abnormal or unusual.
The important thing to realize is that manipulators are great at hiding in plain sight, because they trust that others
won't realize their true motivations.

Voice Inflection: Another way to detect a manipulator is by dissecting their speech patterns. In our normal
speech patterns, there are voice inflection cues that help us better understand what another person is trying to
say. Voice inflection is the way a person emphasizes certain words while speaking. For example, if you are
trying to get a friend to help you move, you can add emotional stress to the words "help" and "big favor." These
emotional tensions will show your friend how important it is to help you. Manipulators use the same tactic
but will put emotional emphasis on the words to covertly manipulate you by attacking your sensitivities. Manipulators,
when speaking, will also emphasize different phrases and words that will stroke your ego. Manipulators know
that we are easily manipulated if we feel flattered in a situation. Manipulation is about the manipulator getting
something they want by harming the other party. They don't care about the other person and only want what
they can get from that person. To get a better understanding of voice inflection, start listening carefully to
everyone you're talking to. Watching how they deliver certain words will help you better understand how to
catch a manipulator.

False Intimacy: Another tactic manipulators use is false intimacy. False intimacy is the manipulator's
ability to create a sense of familiarity with you even if you don't want it.
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They will invade your personal space by tricking you into thinking they are being friendly. In an interaction with a
handler, they will do everything in their power to get into their personal bubble. They will lean on you and if
you take a step back, they will proceed to move closer. They may even touch your shoulder or arm to try to create
a sense of calm in your mind. The best way to counter their actions is to defend yourself. If they continually lean,
don't move. Make them come as close to you as they want and make them feel uncomfortable. If they try to touch
your arm or shoulder, walk away and let them know that you don't like being touched. Share how you prefer people
who communicate with their words and not their hands. Don't let a manipulator come into your personal space,
because if they do they will take it as a sign that they can easily maneuver you into your life. Manipulators use
that false sense of intimacy to make you believe that they want to be close to you and that they want to connect
with you. They want you to believe that they are there only for your support. In reality, they want to see how far
they can push you before fighting back. If you don't fight, they know you will be easy to manipulate and control.
Never back away when someone tries to invade your personal space. Don't let them make you feel guilty that
you won't let them in, because they have no right to claim ownership of your space.

Now that we have identified the ways a manipulator can use body language and speech to try to infiltrate
your life, we will focus on ways to destroy a manipulator. One thing we must always remember is that
manipulators are human beings and have the same weaknesses as all of us. Their difference is that they try to
hide their weaknesses by exploiting the weaknesses of others. You must remember that a manipulator simply
wants to manipulate, so if they are not given that opportunity, they will move on, leave, because they can't
get anything by bothering with you.

Ignore: As easy as that sounds, ignoring the manipulator can be one of the most difficult challenges to follow in
your plan to destroy them. If you want this step to work, you need to be in full control of your own emotions,
so the manipulator can't use emotional control to get under your skin and get a response. Manipulators only
want a response from you, because that is how they get their power. If they get the answer they need, the
manipulator knows that they have lost all control in the situation and they are now in control. Manipulators
want your full attention, so they can more easily control the way you think and act. If you completely ignore
their advances, they can have no power over you.

If you see them in social situations, ignore everything they say and do. Be sure to let the handler know that you
are ignoring them. If they call you, just apologize for them thinking you are ignoring them. If you attack them
personally, saying that they are too thin or simply shouldn't care that much, this can, in turn, get into the mind of
the manipulator. Once he's inside their minds, their control will begin to crumble and their plan will be lost as they
try to prove to him that he's ignoring them. If you laugh at it, this will only make the manipulator angrier. Respond
with a calm response and they won't have a way back into your mind. Manipulation focuses on emotion and if
you can get under their skin properly, you have already turned the tables on them.

Attack your Circle: Manipulators will try to slip into your life unnoticed and disrupt your way of life. They can turn
your friends against you and make you seem like you are the one who is out of control.
They will start rumors and play on your weaknesses. They know your weaknesses because they are observers.
That is the strength of a manipulator. They can infiltrate your lives so completely that they will know
exactly what to say or do to make you lose your cool. They will get between you and your friends, leaving you
alone with no support. If this happens, take a page out of your playbook
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and infiltrate and attack their inner circle. You need to figure out who they use as a close support system and use
that to your advantage.

You can slowly begin to insinuate yourself into their lives and by using the persuasive techniques mentioned in the
other chapters, you can effectively transform their views of the manipulator. Remember to start slowly and
don't let the handler know what you are trying to accomplish. Let the manipulator find out for himself when he
is invited to social gatherings with his friends. Act surprised when you find out that the manipulator also
knows that new group of friends you're hanging out with. The manipulator will begin to lose focus of their goal to
disrupt your life and focus on preventing you from doing the same. Try to hang out with your circle of friends
when they are not around and use that time to research information about the manipulator. Use the information
they share with you to find the manipulator's weaknesses. When you are around the manipulator, mention the times
you have gone out with your circle of friends when the manipulator was not there. Be sure to let them know that
you thought it was strange that the manipulator wasn't invited since the manipulator was friends with that circle of
friends first. Remember, manipulation is a mind game and if you can get into their mind they will not be able to
continue their attacks on you.

Clinging to Self: The main tactic manipulators use is to destroy your own understanding of who you are. They will
sneak into your way of thinking to change it and adapt it to your goals. They will paint you to be a suspicious
person who takes things too seriously. They will be using techniques to make others think you are a little
unbalanced. What is important to remember is that you must always remain true to who you are and what you
think. If others come to you with concerns about how you have been acting, be open and honest with them
about how you feel. Let them know that those reactions are legitimate and sincere. Let them see the real you. If
they have been your friends or colleagues for a while, they should be able to look past the tactics used by the
manipulator. A manipulator cannot change you unless you let him do so. You still have control over how you
are perceived.
Manipulators will try to shape your thinking and ultimately take control of who you are. You must have a solid
foundation to be able to carry out this step because, without it, the manipulator will be able to put its claws in
your mind and start pulling the strings, like a puppet.

Guilt is Useless: Manipulators will try to use guilt to get what they want from you. Guilt is a wasted emotion that
only reveals a person's weakness. A smart manipulator knows this and will use the blame against you. They will
make you feel bad for not helping them, even if you don't have to. If you find yourself in a situation where the other
party is using guilt to get you to make their offer, you need to reevaluate these feelings. Why do you feel guilty? Is
he coming from a legitimate place or is he just feeling guilty because they want you to feel guilty? You can tell
when people are using guilt because they will present body language and vocal styles that show hurt or
pain. They will try to play on your desire to help shame you into doing what they want. They will try to paint
themselves as the victim in the situation, so you will believe that you are doing the harm, which you are not.
They are the ones that hurt. They are manipulating your way of thinking so that you do exactly what they want
you to do. Be aware of this tactic, as it is extremely effective in the manipulation process.

We tend to see a hurt person and believe we should help them, so manipulators take advantage of our need to
help and use it against us. When you suspect that a person is using guilt to get you to do what they want,
take a moment to reevaluate.
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really what is happening. You will begin to realize that they are trying to use your emotions against you. If you call
them, they will most likely try to use more guilt to get you to ignore your own observations of the situation. Don't
let them do that. You must be strong when dealing with a person who uses blame as a manipulation tactic, because
it attacks our need to want to heal those who are harmed.

Don't Be Weak: Sometimes life can be very hard to handle. We face many stressors that can break our resolve
and make us vulnerable to attacks from a manipulator. We can be tired and confused by those stressors that
make our minds an open playground for anyone with time and effort. Stress can also make you listless with what's
going on in your life. You become disinterested and unfocused, so you don't have a clear direction in it. When
you don't have a clear direction in life, a manipulator will take this and use it to their advantage. They see a
weak mind that they can control. Always be aware of times in your life when you feel listless or fatigued because
manipulators will see this as an opportunity to gain a foothold. Be strong and focused in everything you
do, even when you don't want to. If you're feeling listless, tired, or lost, find ways to bring focus back into your
life. Find passions that keep you connected, that make you feel something, anything. Little by little you will begin to
regain that composure you once lost or lacked, and manipulators will not be able to infiltrate your mind.
Manipulators seek, they need a mind that is easy to control, and if they appear weak and apathetic, you
will be the main victim of their tactics.

Emotions: As we have mentioned in previous chapters, emotions play an important role in manipulating the mind.
If you don't have control over your emotions, manipulators can use your response to bend your reactions to
their benefit. For example, they may use your anger as a way to paint you as an unbalanced individual who
can explode at any moment. So if someone has ever seen you angry even if the anger was justified, they will begin
to see you differently. Their perspective on you has changed now, and it has changed to what the manipulator
presents. The manipulator can also use your anger to control who you are. They can make you feel
ashamed for expressing legitimate anger. Anger is a normal emotion that we all feel and we all have moments
in our lives where we have to express it. A manipulator will make you believe that your anger is not warranted
and that you shouldn't even be angry about the situation. What is important to remember is to control
that anger. He tries to calm down and logically thinks about the situation. If you can see that you are right,
then calmly discuss how you have every right to express yourself this way. If they try to make you feel bad,
shut them down and call them. Let them know that you will not allow them to take control of your healthy
emotional reactions. If they know they are aware of the situation and do not allow their actions to trigger another
emotional response, then you are the one in control.

Probe: When you meet a manipulator, put your full attention on them. Don't let them hide behind their fake
niceties. When you have a conversation with a manipulator, come back all about them. If they are asking you
questions to get information, ignore those questions and say that you are more interested in knowing them. If
they refuse, make them feel uncomfortable about the situation. You must let them know that you know their
tactics and you will not let them win. Find out all you can about them. Don't let them focus on you again. Manipulators
will try to focus the conversation on you so they can get as much information as they can use against you. If you
don't give them this opportunity, they won't be able to insert themselves into your way of thinking. Also, if
they want you to do something for them, ask them if they think
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that your request is reasonable. What are they getting out of this situation? More importantly, what are you getting
out of this opportunity? Be sure to let them know that you are aware of what they are trying to do to you.
Manipulators only want to go after those they can see as trusting and naive. Be sure to let the manipulator know that
your trust is not something that can be earned through manipulation tactics.

Setting Boundaries: When interacting with a manipulator, a sure way to destroy their tactics before they begin is to
set boundaries in the relationship. If you let them know what you expect from the relationship, they won't try to
force anything. If you try, remember not to compromise. A manipulator can use a compromise to their
advantage because if you give them an inch they will take it and run with it. All a manipulator needs is a small
opening and it will slide right in. Make sure you are clear about your established boundaries. If they don't respect
your boundaries, then this gives you one more reason to cut them out of your life completely.

Fight Uncertainty: A manipulator feeds on your doubt. If you are not sure of yourself, they will use it to feed into
your thought life. Don't let them see that you have any doubts or they will seize on that weakness to their
advantage. The first step in fighting this tactic is to stop doubting yourself. Focus on the fact that you don't owe
anyone anything for the decisions you make.
Make the decisions that work best for your life. Don't let others jump in and start making decisions for you, because
they will ultimately choose those that benefit them and not you.

Emphasize your flaws: manipulators run on your ego. They believe they are smarter and stronger than those
around them. When you identify a manipulator, find their weakness and use it against them. For example, if a
handler is wearing a strong cologne, let them know. Make it seem like your cologne is overpowering and smells
cheap. Manipulators run on charm, so when their charm is challenged, they will slowly back down. Use your observation
skills to find their weakness and use it against them. This will completely disrupt your game plan.

When you meet a manipulator, always remember that they want to control. Don't give him that control.
As mentioned earlier in this chapter, manipulators will take the smallest openings in your mind and exploit them. You
can prevent this from happening by being observant in every social situation and judging whether a person is
genuine or manipulative.
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Conclusion

Throughout this text, we've discussed how persuasion affects every aspect of our lives, including marketing,
politics, and our friends and family. We highlight how politicians and businessmen use these tactics to gain power
and authority in our society. You also learned that you can use those tactics to your own advantage. We have
also discussed how important it is for you to be observant in every social situation to help you become more
aware of the persuasive tactics of those around you. Hopefully, after reading this text, you'll have the skills
to identify and read body language and use that information to your advantage. We were able to dive into our
own personalities to reveal how our personalities can help or hinder the mind manipulation process.

We have learned that through a deeper understanding of ourselves, we are better equipped to control our
own social environments. Through Dr. Cialdini's writings and the steps aligned in Chapter 3, you are now
equipped to use these tactics to strive for improvement in your life. If you're working toward a new job or promotion,
you'll now be ready to face those challenges head-on. You will now also be prepared to protect yourself from
manipulative mind control by using your powers of observation to prevent anyone from becoming ingrained
in your way of thinking.
After reading this text, you should be a more well-rounded person who can navigate in any social circle and get
the admiration you deserve.

The main goal of this text is to show you the power you have to become a master of persuasive techniques,
all you need to do is take control of your own mind. If you are in control of how you think and react, no one will be
able to use manipulation against you. You will also be more than capable of using your mind to control and
persuade those around you. Once you have achieved self-actualization, you will have achieved the skills necessary
to use persuasion to propel you further into the social strata. Never forget that you can only gain control over
others if you have control over yourself.
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