Coaching Philosophy Through years of education and experience, I have developed philosophies that have served as the foundation
of my approach to coaching. My perspectives were formed from a broad range of sources psychology, sociology, philosophy, coaching theories, and spiritual concepts as well as from wisdom gained through my personal and professional experiences. I have included a few of these ideas to provide some insight into my viewpoint and approach. Whole Person Be-Do-Have Model Clutter-Free Living Baby Steps Self-Sufficiency Whole Person I approach coaching from a holistic perspective. While it is possible to focus on one area, like career for example, it is important to recognize that you are not living in a vacuum and that every sector of life affects every other money, health, relationships, self-image, and the list goes on. It is because of this that I look to coach the whole person. While we will have "primary focus" areas in the coaching experience, we will continually examine all sectors of what I call The Wheel of Life. Back to top Be-Do-Have Model As humans, we are action-oriented and tend to place emphasis on all that we are doing and accomplishing. There is nothing wrong with this of course, as it allows us to accomplish a great deal. However, when we are focused on the do as the starting point for all we can have and be in the world, our do-have-be orientation traps us in the belief that we must fix and solve and achieve to get results and be of value. We have the power to design our lives, careers, and businesses. I believe that who we are in the world must start with asking who we are and whats important to us based on our wants, needs, values, and goals. By first becoming clear about who and what we want to "be, we are better able to consciously make choices ("do") and produce outcomes ("have") that are in alignment with our core selves. This is the "Be-Do-Have Model," an approach that achieves far greater results, and is ultimately easier and more satisfying.
For more on this topic, review this post on my Judah Buddha blog: Taking Action: Before You Do, Start with Be
Back to top Clutter-Free Living Physical clutter crowds our space, mental clutter crowds our minds, emotional clutter crowds our hearts and psyches all distracting and disempowering us from living our fullest, best selves. If our homes are cluttered or our relationships are messy, our time and energy can often be wasted on attempting to maintain the status quo, make "it" better, or avoid responsibilities. I have developed and instituted a practice of "clutter-free living" in my daily life and encourage it with my clients. By taking time and focused action to reduce and eliminate these distractions and time/energy drains, it is possible to start focusing on what is most important to you. To read more, take a look at the Judah Buddha blog piece, titled: What Are You Tolerating? Back to top Baby Steps Making changes in life or tackling big projects can feel very daunting especially when juggling a busy schedule, various relationships, and multiple priorities. If approached systematically, however, it does not have to feel like an all-or-nothing situation. At the outset, it is important to get clear about the purpose for what you want to create or accomplish, and then envision the desired outcomes. You then identify key milestones along the path and break the project down into smaller, more manageable bite-size chunks. Action can then be taken gradually in "baby steps" on a daily or weekly basis, helping you move toward what you want with a sense of accomplishment and pride. By identifying a motivating context and clear structure, you feel inspired and pulled toward your end goal rather than feeling like you are in a constant push toward the finish line. For an expanded discussion on this topic, see the Judah Buddha blog post called: Baby Steps Get You There Back to top Self-Sufficiency
As a coach, I strive to form a collaborative partnership that fosters self-sufficiency, not dependency. While the coach guides and supports, it is you, the client, who ultimately takes the actions to get where you want to be. Because they invested the time and energy into the process, they know that they are the source of their growth, learning, and success. My goal is to assist the client in identifying and mastering a set of tools for their toolbox that they take with them when the coaching relationship ends. This instills confidence in their own strength and resourcefulness, and empowers them with the knowledge that any challenge is surmountable, and any goal can be attained through conscious, self-generated action. Back to top
Friday, January 7, 2011 Taking Action: Before You Do, Start with Be As the clich goes, we are notoriously human doings. We are action oriented, and evaluate ourselves daily on how much we are doing, producing, and achieving. We have to-do lists and goals and resolutions and "shoulds." We tend to place priority on problem solving and accomplishing tasks (do), so that we can yield some sort of outcome (have), and then be something or someone in the world.
When we are in this Do-Have-Be orientation, we often are evaluating our actions and whether or not we are worthy, valid, successful, productive, or [insert judgment here]. How many of you out there do your work/career, so you can have the money to create/maintain the life you want, so that you can be happy and fulfilled?
Our intentions are not bad; rather they are misguided. What would life be like if we were clear about who we are and whats important to us, and made choices in alignment with that? It would seem our actions would flow more naturally and be better suited to what we really want todayas opposed to this continual tackling of to-do lists and email requests, and shoulds and have tos. Perhaps we would no longer feel like we are pushing a boulder uphill. Perhaps we could feel energized knowing that our actions are based on a solid foundation that is a reflection of the person we are now, not what we were in the past or believe we should be in the future. Our perspective and approach to what we are up to in our lives is just as (if not more) important to the outcome as the actions themselves. We tend to be happier and more satisfied when our actions are grounded in a sense of purpose and are aligned with our values. Rather than enacting the Do-Have-Be approach, consider instead the Be-Do-Have Model -- a cycle of
thought and action related to making, enacting, and evaluating choices.
BE Rather than focusing first on the action and the "Do," lets start with who we are and whats important to us, or the BE. While it is important to create structures, accountability, and targets, how often do we take a step back and ask ourselves why we are doing what we are doing? We get so caught up in the gogo-go of daily life and all the responsibilities that go along with it, we neglect to ask ourselves on a regular basis about:
Purpose/Calling: Who am I? What am I passionate about? Who do I want to be in the world? Values: Whats important to me? What do I stand for? Motivators: What turns me on and off? What keeps me going? Influencers: What am I capable of? What do I really want?
How clear we are about the why has a huge impact on our levels of commitment, engagement, and satisfaction with the experience. It also affects our effectiveness, innovation, creativity, and ability to
maintain and sustain the action over the longer term. DO We are experts at this part. However, when we are clear about who we are and what is important to us, the choice to act is much simpler. While we might need some assistance in figuring out the best actions to take, the bigger picture goal is self-evident. We know we want something and are willing to take the steps to move us in that direction. HAVE Whether we are happy with the results or not, we get something. Perhaps its something tangible, or maybe its a feeling. Whatever the case, we are in a position to evaluate our outcomes and choose whether we want to continue on the same path, cease what we are doing, or reevaluate how we are going about it. When we reevaluate, it is important to cycle back through BE to confirm whether our self-assessment was accurate. If so, we analyze what worked and didnt work in our previous effort to identify where our actions need to be repeated or tweaked. You are free to approach your experiences in whatever way you choose. Greater happiness and satisfaction in work and life come from being conscious of who you are and whats important to you as a foundation for what you choose to do and create. If you are interested in learning more about this, I am happy to share the Masters thesis I wrote at Northwestern University titled: The Quest for Happiness: An Exploration of Values, Vocational Choice, and Meaning in Life and Work. Email me and Ill send you either the full thesis or an executive summary.
