evermore

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/42900144.

Rating: Explicit
Archive Warning: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Category: M/M
Fandom: NCT (Band), SuperM (Korea Band)
Relationship: Lee Taeyong/Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten
Character: Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten, Lee Taeyong, Jeong Yuno |
Jaehyun, Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung, Kang Seulgi, NCT Ensemble
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Dystopia, Future, 2100s, Strangers to Lovers, Exes
to Lovers, star-crossed lovers, Military, Military Academy, Canon-
Typical Violence, Gun Violence, Urban warfare, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff,
Heavy Angst, Happy Ending, Bigotry & Prejudice, Terrorism, side jaedo,
Smut
Language: English
Collections: taeten wondrous miztopia multiverse
Stats: Published: 2022-11-06 Completed: 2022-12-15 Chapters: 39/39 Words:
69137

evermore
by mizrosecat

Summary

In the militarized country of Corinth, Ten is a Dawi refugee who fled from war. Like every
eighteen-year-old, he must attend military school. There he meets Taeyong, a rich boy who
never looked at him before. But, contrary to first impressions and despite coming from
different worlds, Ten and Taeyong build an unexpected bond.

Notes

i have arrived.

with another taeten fic.

✨ ✨ evermore✨ ✨

this story spans around 7 years in the lives of the characters. it starts
with ten at 18. despite the scary tags, a lot of this story is very romantic, my usual brand of
taeten fluff. it gets more angsty as the fic progresses.

ignore the age differences of the real idols, because here at the start of
the story they are either 18 (first year students) or 19 (second year students).

about the graphic depictions of violence warning: i decided to use it

despite only a couple of scenes where things get ugly. none of it reaches gore levels but it's
plain that they are hurting, so i decided to err on the safe side to warn people upfront.

the characters here go through military school and the conditioning

that comes from military training. they are stronger than their real-life counterparts (girls
included). not in a hollywood marvel movie type of way, but more muscular yes. picture for
reference if you don't know what i mean here. you can see they are strong but all look
different because there are many ways to be muscular.

this is set in a fictional world i made up! here's the map! i made one
because i figured it might aid understanding the geopolitical implications that are in the
story.

when i describe taeyong as a blond with gray eyes here i mean he is a

natural blond with natural gray eyes. it's an alternate world with alternative phenotypes. this
aesthetic choice obviously comes from real life taeyong wearing light colored lenses and
bleaching his hair though. visual aid of what they look in the fic:
 the playlist for this fic is taylor swift's album "evermore". like literally
LMAO i found this album at the beginning of writing the story and it just set the mood for
me! all chapters are quotes of lyrics from the album.

anyway i think that's it for author's note! i had fun writing this and i hope you enjoy reading

See the end of the work for more notes

 hey, december
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

It is winter break. Ten and his best friend Jaehyun are in Delphi, a small town on the borders of
their military boarding school, the Spartan Academy. The settlement serves as a getaway for the
students that attend the enormous academy. The eighteen-year-olds are covered in thick coats,
gloves, and faux-leather boots, staving off from the snow. They get into a candy shop that sells a
diverse range of colorful sweets. Jaehyun immediately grabs Ten’s hand and pulls him inside. The
store is packed with people, though, and this makes Ten bump into a black silhouette.

“Sorry,” he murmurs at someone’s back.

“Hm.” The blond-haired person just turns and leaves.

Ten frowns as Jaehyun keeps pulling him, and Ten allows himself to be taken to wherever his
friend wants him to go.

“Look!” Jaehyun beams, excitedly. “Soda pops. So many flavors.”

He looks like he’s salivating, but Ten understands him. In the Academy, they aren’t allowed
snacks inside. The food isn’t bad but even the desserts can’t compare to the sweetness they might
purchase at the shop. And when you spend months without it, you start to crave it badly.
Especially Jaehyun. He decides to buy four cans. They step out into the windy streets, looking for a
quiet place to sit.

They find a bench near the edge of the city and get as comfortable as they can. Jaehyun takes the
cans from the plastic bag and examines them.

“Which one do you want?” he asks.

“Any.”

He gives Ten the strawberry and cola. Ten pops one open, the fizzing sound satisfying. He drinks
it.

“Let’s crack the ring tab off after?” Jaehyun asks, taking a sip from his. “You know, the tradition.”

“What tradition?”

“You pull and push the tab back and forth,” he explains. “With each move, you say a letter of the
alphabet. When it comes off, a person with that initial will fall in love with you, if you keep the
ring tab.” He starts shifting his. “A, B, C, D—” It breaks. Jaehyun stares at it.

Ten thinks this sounds terribly silly, like a childhood game. He’s never heard of it, maybe because
he grew up in Daw. He moved to the Sovereign State of Corinth when he was thirteen, running
away from the war that broke in his home continent. He is a refugee here, but he still needs to
attend the mandatory military school, because everyone, regardless of gender and sex, is supposed
to. Over a hundred years ago, with the rise of global conflicts and warmongering, Corinth became a
stratocracy—a government run by the military, with a selected Chairperson at the head—and all its
citizens are supposed to have at least basic training.

Ten sees the innocent glint in Jaehyun’s eye. Maybe the fantasy of a love is not a bad one to have,
when the world is literally falling apart around them. Food deserts, water shortage, pollution, the
rise of fascism, loss of civil rights. Countries aren’t blowing themselves up with nuclear bombs
because it would be mutual assured destruction. But this doesn’t stop everything from descending
into chaos. Ten’s home continent is now a war-ridden, annihilated wasteland. He is lucky he
escaped to the Vast North and was granted entry in Corinth. Not everyone had the same fate.

So Ten will indulge his friend and play, too.

He met Jaehyun right as he got put into school when he arrived, and they quickly became friends.
Jaehyun never looked down on him for being Dawi, which is something that happens a lot.
Xenophobia runs rampant, not only in Corinth, but everywhere in the world. Refugees like Ten
struggle to adapt because of that and are told to go back to where they came from. With the years,
Ten got used to it. He is glad that, at least with the years of lesser sun exposure, his skin became
paler, so he isn’t so glaringly foreign anymore. He also worked very hard to not have an accent
when he speaks Corinthian. Here in the Academy, no one besides Jaehyun knows his true status,
not even the staff. The records of his nationality were sealed after he got Corinth documents and a
new name, ‘Ten Lee’.
Jaehyun cracks his second ring tab. “J.” He smiles giddily, his eyes crescent moons, puffy bottom
lids, dimples showing. “This one is for you.”

Ten rolls his eyes and averts his face, so Jaehyun won’t see him blush with the jab. Ten has a crush
on Johnny, the guy who’s one year ahead of them. He’s one of the few who has ever shown some
kindness towards Ten. He and Jaehyun are sort of outcasts socially speaking. From the few times
they interacted, Ten could see Johnny was tall and muscular, with a brilliant smile and sense of
humor. So obviously Ten developed a thing for him, but it’s nothing serious. He’s not in love with
him.

“Take it,” Jaehyun insists, putting the red tab in front of Ten’s face. “Come on!”

“Alright,” he concedes, pushing it inside his pocket.

Ten finally finishes his drink and decides to do the game. Jaehyun watches with an excited smile.

“A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K,” Ten goes on, pushing and pulling lightly. “L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S,
T—”

Crack.

“Finally,” says Jaehyun.

Ten pockets the silver ring tab. He opens the second can of soda—this one has a black tab—and
gulps it all quickly.

“Okay, another one. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L—” Crack.

Jaehyun hums.

“Who has T and L initials?” Ten asks, trying to comb his memory through the people he knows.

“Lee Taeyong,” Jaehyun answers quickly.

Ten makes a surprised face. “Only him?”

“Probably not. But he’s the one I can think of,” says Jaehyun.

Lee Taeyong is one year ahead of them. He’s Johnny’s classmate. With distinct platinum hair and
gray eyes, he never looked at Ten twice. He is the teacher’s assistant in Ten’s firearm class. What
Ten knows about him, from gossip—first-years love to talk about their seniors and will do it
publicly and loudly—, is that his family is wealthy. He probably considers people like Ten as
second-class citizens.

“Keep them,” Jaehyun says.

Ten grimaces.

“Oh, come on. It won’t hurt.” His friend smiles.

To please him, Ten pockets the tabs as a gush of wind hits his face, ruffling his pitch-black hair.

“It’s getting late,” says Jaehyun. “We should get back to the Academy.”

“Okay.”
They trail to the main road that will take them back to the school grounds. A lot of the students are
already there, also returning. In between them, Ten notices a group of second-year students. He
recognizes Johnny and his classmates Kim Doyoung, Nakamoto Yuta, Kim Jungwoo, Moon Taeil,
and—there he is—Lee Taeyong. His blond hair is fluttering in the wind. Ten stares at him from
afar, his side profile sharp as he smiles and talks to the others.

Ten trips, but Jaehyun catches his arm before he falls.

“Careful, Tennie.”

“Thanks.”

Ten straightens himself, and they keep walking. When his eyes land on Taeyong again, he’s
watching Ten. The icy breeze grazes Ten’s face, and he breaks eye contact.

Everyone keeps walking back to the academy on the beat road covered in snow, the wind howling
stronger, the sun setting. Ten re-wraps his red scarf around his neck. He grew up in warmer
weather than this, and his body still struggles to adjust sometimes. Jaehyun has his cheek flushed as
he steals glances at the group of second-year students from afar. Ten wonders who caught his
attention.

The massive concrete walls of the Academy rise all around the enormous grounds. There are
patrols all around it, and a security post at the gate. The students make a line and are slowly let in
after their fingerprints are identified in the system. Ten is getting hungry while they wait for their
turn. It’s almost dinnertime. He’s longing for a full belly and the warmth of his dorm.

They pass security and continue to the enormous main building that houses most of everything in
their school. Dormitories, cantina, kitchen, classrooms. As Ten and Jaehyun cross inside towards
the refectory to eat dinner, they pass the group of second-year students again. Ten notices
Taeyong’s eyes on him. Again. This makes him nervous for some reason. Taeyong has never
noticed him once, and now he looked at him twice in one day?

“…party.” A girl is saying to them, not really trying to be quiet.

Illegal parties and gatherings take place in the school all the time. Probably because it’s the
students themselves who are tasked with monitoring the halls. And probably because the ones
throwing these parties have enough money to bribe people to look the other way. They manage to
smuggle alcohol in too. Ten has no idea how. He’s never been to one—never been invited.

Ten and Jaehyun get their trays and servings of food and sit at the long table side by side.

Ten has got his mouth full when suddenly Johnny approaches and sits in front of them, his elbows
on the table. He opens a wide smile at Ten, who hurriedly chomps and swallows his food.

“Hey, guys,” says Johnny.

“Hi, Johnny,” says Jaehyun.

“Hey,” says Ten.

“So… I wanted to invite you too to a party tonight,” Johnny says.

Ten widens his eyes. Did he hear him right?

“Yes. We would love to,” Jaehyun answers quickly.

 Ten shoots a glance at his friend, still too stunned to say anything.

“Where?” Jaehyun asks.

“Basement A. Midnight. See you there.” Johnny winks at them and leaves.

“Oh, my God!” Jaehyun murmurs excitedly. He turns to Ten and shakes his shoulder. “You have
some sauce on your chin.” He points.

“What?” Ten wipes his skin, flustering. He was just in front of Johnny all dirty like that. His face
gets hot.

After dinner, they head to their dorms. It’s a bare space with bunk beds. Ten and Jaehyun share
one, Jaehyun taking the top one and Ten the bottom one.

“Are you sure we should go?” Ten says, chewing his finger.

“Of course we should!” Jaehyun smiles. “It will be fun.”

“How do you know that?”

“I don’t know how I know, but I know.”

“What are we supposed to wear?” Ten asks, suddenly worried about his appearance.

It’s not like he has many clothes. Apart from a few pairs of briefs and thermal wear—provided by
the government—, he has three sets of the charcoal uniform, one thinner for warm weather and two
for the harsh northern cold, all given by the Academy when he was admitted. The uniform also
includes a heavy coat, scarf, gloves and hat, faux-leather boots. For his civilian clothes, which were
all second-hand purchases from goodwill, he owns one pair of black jeans, two t-shirts and a light
jacket, nothing fancy. His family doesn’t have money to waste on more.

“I can lend you a nice shirt,” Jaehyun says gently. He and his family are wealthy.

“Alright.”

But as midnight approaches and they get ready, Ten is still nervous. He finishes buttoning the
black shirt that is a tad big on him. Jaehyun looks him up and down and fixes his bangs for him.

“You look great,” says his friend.

“You look better,” Ten teases.

Jaehyun is a pretty guy, tall with broad shoulders, making everything he wears look amazing.

“Let’s go.” Jaehyun smiles, tapping Ten’s back.

Chapter End Notes

the game with the soda tab is a real thing from my young teen years! have you ever
played something similar?
 no crowd of friends applauded
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten and Jaehyun stalk the empty and darkened halls of the school, light on their feet. There are
monitors that patrol all night, and they are careful not to bump on anyone, making sure to check
before they cross the corridors.

“Lee Taeyong looked at me twice today,” Ten blurts out in a whisper.

Jaehyun squints at him.

“What?”

“He’s never looked at me in the past half year. Today he looked at me twice.”

Jaehyun grins. “I told you the ring tab game works.”

“Shut up.” Ten rolls his eyes.

They go downstairs to Basement A. Jaehyun knocks on the door. A girl opens up.

“Come in.”

There is music and colorful lighting in the space. It’s not big by any means, and there aren’t a lot of
people. Almost everyone has a cup on their hands.

“Jaehyun! Ten!” Johnny shows up suddenly.

Ten smiles nervously. Johnny pats their shoulders.

“Wanna meet my friends?” Johnny asks.

“Sure!” Jaehyun answers.

Ten just follows them to a corner of the room. There is a small group of second-year students there,
but Ten notices Taeyong isn’t.

“This is Doyoung, Yuta, Taeil, Jungwoo, Seulgi, Irene.” Johnny points at them casually, and some
nod back at Ten and Jaehyun.

“Let’s do shots,” says Yuta.

A bottle of vodka appears in his hand, and he fills the plastic cups one by one. Jaehyun accepts one.

“No, thank you,” Ten says. He doesn’t want to drink. He never did, and he’s not sure it’s a good
idea.

Everyone makes a circle, and they all bring their cups together before downing them.

“Another!” Taeil shouts.

They laugh. Ten looks at Johnny, who’s smiling, and feels his cheeks get a bit warm. He turns to
Jaehyun who drinks a second shot. He’s bumping shoulders with Doyoung, and Ten notices he’s
giving Jaehyun a side-eyed glance. Ten wonders if maybe there is a water somewhere for him to
drink. He scans his surroundings and finds Taeyong leaning against a wall, talking to a girl. He’s
dressed in black, the sleeves of his shirt folded and revealing his strong forearms.

After a couple more drinks, Jaehyun has a silly smile on his face.

“You big fool,” Ten teases, shaking his head.

“Shut up,” Jaehyun laughs. “Have fun!” He takes Ten’s hand and makes him twirl around. Ten
laughs along.

Ten eyes Johnny curiously. He’s talking enthusiastically with Taeil, far enough that Ten can’t hear
them over the music. Some people are dancing.

“Hey.” It’s Doyoung, striking a conversation with Jaehyun. He’s peering into him with his dark
eyes. He’s very pretty, with his fair skin and black hair.

“Hey. I’m Jaehyun.” His friend is smiling like a fool.

Ten wants to roll his eyes but stops himself. This is good. Let Jaehyun flirt and have fun. Their
lives revolve solely around strict discipline and difficult classes. It’s good to have an escape from
the dire reality they exist in. Ten decides to leave them alone and gingerly trails to Johnny’s side.
He stares up at him, at his brown hair combed back. He’s so sexy.

Time passes and Ten tries to mingle, although he’s still a bit shy around these strangers. He can be
very relaxed after becoming friends with someone, but before that not really. Especially because of
his status as a foreigner, he’s afraid to open up to new people, like someone might find out about
his truth.

His eyes travel the room, and he sees Taeyong and his lady friend are going at it against the wall.
His big hands are on her ass, their bodies and mouths glued together.

“Okay,” Ten mutters to himself, averting his eyes.

“Well, Taeyong is going to fuck someone new tonight,” Johnny announces to the group casually.

They all laugh, except for Ten.

“Nothing new under the sun,” says Jungwoo.

“He’s a whore,” says Seulgi.

“We love a whore, though,” Johnny offers.

“We do,” says Yuta.

Ten searches for Jaehyun. He’s a couple of feet away, and Doyoung is talking in his ear. They are
incredibly close, and whatever Doyoung says is making Jaehyun laugh. Ten chuckles at the scene.
He decides to go to the restroom. When he comes back, Jaehyun and Doyoung are kissing. He
takes this as a hint that it’s time to go. Jaehyun can find his way back to the dorm after.

Ten doesn’t say goodbye to anyone, just cuts through the people until the exit. He climbs the stairs
slowly, watching his feet.

“Already leaving, Lee?”

The low voice startles Ten, who looks up to find Taeyong in the corridor, leaning against the wall
with his arms folded over his chest. His gray eyes are peering into Ten curiously. How does he
even know Ten’s last name?

“Yes,” Ten says simply.

“Isn’t it too early?”

“I’m not a big party person,” Ten answers coldly.

“Too bad.” And Taeyong smirks. “You look good out of your uniform.”

Ten’s heart does a dance inside his ribcage, his face flushing red. But he gets himself together.

“I’m flattered.”

With that, he turns around and leaves towards his dorm.

What the hell just happened?

Something heavy jumps on Ten’s bed, waking him up. It’s Jaehyun.

“Hm, go away.” Ten hides under the pillow.

“Wake up!” Jaehyun shakes him.

“I don’t want to,” Ten whines. “We are on winter break. We don’t have mandatory wake time.”

“But I got to tell you everything that happened.”

Ten groans and sits up, taking his bangs out of his eyes. Jaehyun is smiling from ear to ear.

“God, you look silly,” Ten says.

“Shut up and listen,” Jaehyun says. “Did you see what happened? Doyoung kissed me.”

“I saw that.” Ten can’t help but smile at his friend’s excitement, too. “How was it?”

“It was perfect!” Jaehyun throws himself back on the bed dramatically. Ten knows this was his
first kiss.

Jaehyun sits up again.

“But then Sejin, she…” Jaehyun lowers his voice. Sejin is their classmate. “Apparently, she likes
Doyoung. So she threw a fit and badmouthed me to anyone who would hear.”

“Seriously?”

Jaehyun nods. “I don’t care, though. Nothing can taint the memory. Doyoung is an excellent kisser.
I’m pretty sure he practiced before.”

They giggle.

“Also, Johnny kissed a girl last night after you left,” Jaehyun adds, scanning for Ten’s reaction.
 “So?” Ten tries to remain impassive.

“Don’t you care?”

“Why would I?”

Jaehyun pokes him.

“Because you like him.”

“Shut up,” Ten says. “It’s just a silly crush. It isn’t serious.”

“If you say so. But you would have a chance if you tried.”

“Let’s go eat breakfast, I’m hungry.” Ten changes the subject.

They dress in regular clothes and head to the cantina.

“Taeyong got together with someone too,” Jaehyun says.

“I saw it,” Ten answers. “He talked to me, actually.”

“What?!”

Ten nods. “When I was leaving, he said I looked good in civilian clothes.”

“Are you serious?” Jaehyun squeals, grabbing Ten’s sleeve and shaking it around.

Ten just laughs. “Whatever. I don’t care what he thinks.”

“Hm. There will be another party this Friday,” Jaehyun says. “More private. Doyoung invited us.”

“And you need me to go?” Ten whines.

“Of course you should go,” Jaehyun insists. “We are on winter break, after an entire semester of
doing nothing but training and studying. Please, Ten, come have fun with me!”

“Alright, alright,” Ten concedes. “What won’t I do for you?”

“I love you.” Jaehyun passes an arm around Ten’s shoulder. He fits under his arm perfectly
because of their height difference.

“I love you too,” Ten says sincerely. He does. What would he do without Jaehyun?

After breakfast, they get up.

“Gardens?” Jaehyun suggests.

“Okay.”

Chapter End Notes

taeyong is bisexual here btw so don't worry about him hooking up with women
before he realizes ten is right there (although taeyong did acknowledge him already!)
this is not a slow burn but there is some build up needed before they get together!
 this dorm was once a madhouse
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

The grounds of the Academy are huge. There is a vast field of white in between the buildings and
the training center, where they practice combat, conditioning, and weapons training. Now that they
are on a break, the grass and scattered trees are used for students to lounge on. Ten and Jaehyun sit
a few meters away from the group of second-years students. Sejin and four of her friends are also
there, and as they see Jaehyun, they start shooting daggers at him with their eyes. Jaehyun keeps
his cool.

Ten steals a quick glance at Johnny. No. He doesn’t care. It’s just a silly crush.

“They could be less obvious,” Jaehyun sighs.

“I know. Don’t let them intimidate you.”

Ten observes the people around them. He sees Taeyong among his friends, talking to Doyoung,
and not far from him, the girl he was kissing the night before is obviously staring at him.

“What’s the name of the girl Taeyong hooked up with?” Ten asks Jaehyun.

“Kim Ari, I think,” Jaehyun supplies.

Ten hums. When he glances back at Taeyong, the man is staring at him with those gray eyes. A
harsh gust of wind hits Ten in the face, who looks away from him.

Suddenly, Doyoung comes up to them.

“Hey, guys,” says the second-year student, smiling.

“Hey,” Jaehyun answers.

“Hi,” Ten adds.

“Can we talk?” Doyoung asks Jaehyun.

“Sure.”

They get up and leave. Jaehyun shoots a glance back at Ten, who lifts his thumb at him, grinning.

Then Ten realizes he’s alone in the middle of this battle of looks.

He watches as Sejin walks up to Taeyong and strikes up a conversation. They laugh together and it
makes Ari visibly pissed. Taeyong is smiling, flirtatious, and runs a hand through his blond hair.
Ten has to admit he’s kind of charming. Sejin lands a hand on Taeyong’s shoulder.

Taeyong’s eyes flick towards Ten for a second and go back to Sejin. This flusters Ten, realizing
he’s there only staring at others. Maybe he should find Jaehyun. He gets up and starts walking in
the direction where they had gone to, towards the training grounds.

He passes a group of girls gathered around someone. Ten hears sniffling.

“I can’t believe him,” Ari is saying.

“Sejin is a total slut,” one of them says.

“You knew Taeyong is whore,” comes an accusation.

Ten just widens his eyes and hurries, wanting to get away from whatever is happening. Still, Ten
can find sympathy for Ari and the situation she is in. Maybe she likes Taeyong. Ten imagines what
would be like if he got together with Johnny only to be ignored the next day and see him flirt with
someone else. That would definitely suck.

Getting to the training grounds, Ten searches around for Jaehyun and Doyoung. Maybe they are in
the lockers. It’s probably the only place open right now. Ten decides to peek through the windows
of the men’s restroom. They are tall, so he hangs from the metal rim and pulls himself up, putting a
foot against the wall. Straining himself, Ten sees nothing but hears laughter.

“Lee?”

The scare makes Ten slip and fall on his ass. At least the snow cushions it. He stands and turns
around, finding none other than Lee Taeyong, whose eyebrow lifts.

“What are you doing?”

Ten flusters. “Nothing. I was just looking for my friend.”

“Did you find him?” Taeyong asks in his unwavering tone.

“No.”

Taeyong looks him up and down.

“Are you sure you’re dressed for the cold?”

“What do you mean?” Ten crosses his arms over his chest.

Taeyong says nothing, just purses his lips, checking Ten’s clothes. They are old and second-hand
garments, worn out. His black jeans have a torn on the knee. Ten huffs.

“Why do you care?” Ten unfolds his arms and starts walking back to the gardens. He stops
suddenly. “What were you doing there, anyway? Did you follow me?”

Taeyong, who was walking behind Ten, snorts a chuckle. “As if. I was looking for Doyoung.”

Ten just squints at him angrily and turns back around, foot in front of the other. Why is Taeyong
getting under his skin?

He keeps walking until he hears shouting. Ten looks up and sees Ari and Sejin arguing with each
other. Then Ari snatches Sejin by the hair, making her yelp. Ten bolts towards instinctively. He’s
the first to grab Ari’s arm and try to pull them apart. Soon Johnny joins him in the effort to diffuse
the fight. They manage to separate the two girls.

“Bitch!” Sejin barks at her.

“Walk away,” Johnny tells Ari. “Or I’m calling our superiors.”

The threat is enough to make them give their backs to each other. Ten breathes in deeply. Johnny
lands a hand on his shoulder.

“Thank you for stepping up,” he says.

Ten blushes under his kind stare. “It was nothing.”

Snow starts to fall.

“I should go inside,” Ten mutters, leaving.

As he walks, he notices Taeyong is making his way to the main building. He passed the fight
between the two girls like it was nothing. Ten’s blood boils, and he feels like running after
Taeyong only to berate him. Instead, he just shakes his head and sighs. What Taeyong does is none
of his business.

Next day, Ten and Jaehyun step inside the library together to study. They talk in indoor voices.

“I want details,” Ten whispers. “I didn’t even see you come back to the dorm last night.”

Jaehyun stifles his giggles, hand covering his mouth.

“We spent hours talking. And kissing. It was amazing.”

His friend sounds excited, and it makes Ten excited for him.

“He said I’m a good kisser,” Jaehyun adds.

Ten hits his arm playfully. A couple of students pointing and whispering to each other catch their
attention. Ten turns his head and sees Taeyong making out with Sejin next to the vending
machines. His hands are on her ass, their tongues standing out even from afar. Ten rolls his eyes
and looks away from the scene.

“They can’t seem to keep it in their pants,” Jaehyun remarks. “The library, out of all places.”

It is true. And making a poor job to hide it. If the student monitor or staff witness this, they will get
detention. Or maybe rules don’t apply to rich boy Lee Taeyong.

“Well, you got Doyoung,” Ten says playfully.

“I did.” Jaehyun smiles. They find an empty table and sit. “But do you care?”

“Care?”

“About Taeyong making out with Sejin?”

“No.”

“You’re the one that keeps track of how many times he looks at you.”

“Jaehyunnie, shut up.”

His friend chuckles. They hook their portable study tablets in the designated place on the table
station, where it connects to a keyboard and charges.

“He criticized my clothes yesterday,” Ten says. “He’s a huge snob.”

 “So you two are talking?”

Ten flusters. “No! He’s an asshole that keeps playing with other people’s feelings.”

“Well, everyone knows he sleeps around. What were they expecting?”

“He’s a scoundrel,” Ten insists.

He is. Lee Taeyong is a dirty scoundrel and Ten will never like him.

Chapter End Notes

did you hear him, besties? he'll never like him. NEVER

ah yes. taeyong is a hoe, but he isn't pretending to be something else either. it's good to
point out. he's not offering his D with a false pretense of commitment at all. okay?
okay.
 how evergreen, our group of friends
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

The day of the second party arrives. Ten is conflicted. He wants to be there for Jaehyun, but he
feels like he’ll be a third wheel now that his friend has a thing with Doyoung. They will obviously
hook up tonight and what will Ten do?

“You should hang out with Johnny,” Jaehyun insists.

The friends are sitting in the common area of their dorm, chilling out. Ten sighs quietly. He and
Johnny. Can that ever be a thing? Johnny is friendly, but he’s never paid that much attention to
Ten.

“Maybe,” Ten offers. “Or maybe I shouldn’t go.”

Jaehyun huffs, feigning outrage. “I can’t let my best friend miss the most exclusive party of the
year!”

Ten laughs and rests his head on Jaehyun’s shoulder.

“You have to hook up with someone,” says Jaehyun.

“Why?” Ten whines.

“Because you have never been kissed. Do you want the world to end before that happens?”

“I wanna kiss someone I like,” says Ten.

“Well, you have to talk to people to like them.”

“Meh.”

Jaehyun takes Ten by the shoulders, so they are looking at each other.

“Johnny is a cool guy,” he says.

“You don’t even know him that well,” Ten argues. “He is probably like Taeyong. They all are.
You said so yourself he kissed someone at the last party.”

“You know who knows him? Doyoung.” Jaehyun smiles triumphantly, letting go of Ten.

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No, Jaehyun, please don’t do that.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s embarrassing.” Ten hides his face behind his hands. “If I promise to go to the party
and talk to Johnny will you drop this?”

“Yes.” Jaehyun nods.

It’s done. They get ready and after midnight, head towards the location of the party in Basement A.
The place is fairly lit, soft music, people chatting and lounging around. It’s less crowded than last
time. They immediately head towards Doyoung and his group of friends.

“Hey, you two,” Doyoung greets them gleefully. He gives Jaehyun a peck. “How are you, Ten?”

“I’m alright.” He tries to smile.

“Drinks?” Doyoung asks.

“Yes,” Jaehyun answers.

They head to a table filled with bottles. Doyoung pours three shots of vodka. Ten decides to drink
just this one. He gulps it all, liquid burning his throat. He makes a face. Jaehyun grabs his hand.

“Let’s dance.”

“What?” Ten babbles.

But Jaehyun pulls him anyway, a couple of feet towards the middle of the room. There are others
dancing, but Ten is self-conscious. The last time he danced was when he was a child. He used to
put on shows for his grandmother, who cheered him on. Jaehyun is swaying, staring at Ten.

“Come on, Tennie.” He winks.

Ten stands there. Jaehyun puts his hands on Ten’s hips and helps him move. Ten thaws a bit and
lets his friend’s hands guide him. He doesn’t look away from Jaehyun because he wants to pretend
no one else can watch him.

“Feel the music,” Jaehyun says kindly.

“I am.”

“Move your ass.”

“Jaehyun!” Ten chides him, making them laugh.

“Did you notice Doyoung hasn’t taken his eyes off us?” Jaehyun notes.

Ten glances at Doyoung, who’s standing afar with a cup in his hand.

“I see. Maybe he’s jealous you’re not dancing with him.”

Jaehyun takes Ten’s hand and twirls him around. That’s when he sees that Taeyong and Sejin have
arrived.

“Oh, look who’s here. Your man,” Jaehyun teases.

“He wishes.” Ten shakes his head. “That poor girl.”

“Who?”

“Sejin. And any person that gets with him.”

“Why?” Jaehyun asks, genuinely puzzled.

“Because he uses people,” Ten explains.

“He uses them?” Jaehyun lifts his brows. “They use him right back. Have you seen him? He’s hot.
And they say he’s good in bed.”

“Where did you hear that?” Ten doubts.

“The people in our dorm and Doyoung's friends gossip very loudly.” Jaehyun says.

Doyoung shows up at their side. He and Jaehyun lock eyes.

“I’m gonna get a drink.” Ten smiles and excuses himself, giving them privacy. He’s not actually
going to get a drink, but the walks towards the table with the bottles, anyway.

He stands around, checking the labels. He picks up a bottle of vodka.

“You know what? Fuck it.” He mutters to himself and pours a shot on a cup.

Ten sniffs it, scent piercing his nose. He takes a small sip. It is strong, but not awful. Ten twists on
his heels and watches Jaehyun and Doyoung dance closely. They look cute together. Ten searches
the place for Johnny. He stands out with his height. He’s among his friends. Ten musters courage
and walks towards him. He casually stops beside Johnny.

“Hey, Ten,” he says and smiles. “Nice to see you around.”

“Yeah. This is fun.” A lie. It’s not fun at all. But he’s damn trying. “Does this happen often?”

“Not that much during the semester,” Johnny explains. “But now that we are on winter break, we
try to squeeze as much as we can.”

Ten sips his vodka, the liquid warming his stomach. “And you never got into trouble?”

“No. With the right amount of money, people turn a blind eye. We just need to keep out of serious
trouble while we party.”

“Oh, I see.”

“Johnny!” Jungwoo appears, whining and throwing his arms around Johnny’s neck, who falters
and laughs.

“What?” he answers, holding Jungwoo back.

“I’m drunk,” says Jungwoo, and by the sound of his voice he really must be. “I want a kiss.”

Jungwoo puckers his lips and aims for Johnny’s mouth. He doesn’t dodge and then they are
kissing. Watching Johnny kiss someone else makes Ten’s chest ache uncomfortably. He bolts away
to the nearest restroom. He struts in and leans against the sink, having trouble breathing.

As he comes back to reality, Ten hears sounds. He doesn’t understand what they are until he raises
his head and sees, through the mirror, two people inside a stall with the door ajar enough to expose
what they are doing. Fucking. They are fucking. Ten’s eyes widen as he takes the scene in. It’s
Taeyong, holding someone up and against the stall wall, thrusting his hips back and forth. Ten
recognizes Sejin before he escapes the restroom as inconspicuously as he can.

Flustered, he tries to find Jaehyun in the crowd, but he’s nowhere to be seen. He’s with Doyoung
and that’s fine. But Ten needs to leave. He rushes out the door and up the stairs, making his way
back to the dorms.
 When he lies down his head on the pillow, the images of Johnny kissing Jungwoo and Taeyong
fucking Sejin are burned into his brain.

Chapter End Notes

everyone is getting some except for ten

taeyong's courage to approach ten is currently loading btw. wait until chapter 6!

ah. nod to our very own TEN LEE being awkward dancing because he didn't have a
normal childhood because he was busy, you know, surviving and fleeing from WAR
and dealing with that trauma. no big deal i tried to build ten and taeyong's
characters around the circumstances of this new cruel world they live in, which means
some of their real person traits don't make a lot of sense. both of the characters dealt
and will deal with a lot of trauma. it all gets explained more and more as you read the
story. plus the concept of idol doesn't exist in corinth and all few
celebrities/entertainers are rich. it's not a career poor people can strive for.
 rough on the surface, but you cut through like a knife
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“Did you talk to Johnny?” Jaehyun asks first thing in the morning, obviously excited.

Ten exhales, sitting up in bed. “I tried. He kissed Jungwoo.”

“What?”

“Yeah. It was awkward,” Ten vents. “I don’t wanna think about it.”

“Okay.” Jaehyun nods.

“I also… saw Taeyong fucking Sejin in the bathroom.”

Jaehyun widens his eyes and his jaw drops.

“How?!”

“They were inside a stall and left it open,” Ten explains. “They clearly didn’t care.”

“Maybe it’s their kink.”

“Maybe. We shouldn’t judge.”

“We shouldn’t.”

They burst out cackling. Ten holds his belly and gathers his breath.

“Maybe you should just use him for sex,” Jaehyun says.

“What? Use who?”

“Taeyong.” Jaehyun smiles deviously.

“You can’t be serious.”

“I am not. I’m joking. Or maybe I’m a bit serious.”

“Jaehyun…”

“Hear me out,” he interrupts. “We are gonna graduate in two years and if we don’t get into the
Peitharchía, we’ll most probably get drafted to the army, and who knows what will happen then.
We have to make the best out of life while we are young.”

Jaehyun has a point.

“But Taeyong? I will literally fuck anyone else,” Ten insists.

“I just think he’s easy to access,” Jaehyun explains. “He clearly is open for business. With a huge
sign that shines ‘first come, first served’.”

Ten snickers into his hand.

“On that, we can agree.”

Maybe Jaehyun is right. Maybe Ten needs to get good while he can. But not with Taeyong. His
mind floats back to Johnny.

Even with the cold winter weather, Ten and Jaehyun leave to walk the grounds of the Academy,
because staying cooped inside is claustrophobic sometimes. They spend so much time with their
noses glued to their study tablets during the semester that they want to see the sky, feel the wind on
their faces. Ten is mindlessly strolling, hands in his pockets, when he realizes the ring tabs from
the soda cans have been inside it all this time. He takes them out to stare at them, the J, the L, and
the T. Aluminum rings, red, black and silver respectively. He stuffs them back the pocket, not
paying them any mind.

Near the training grounds, there is a group of people hanging out, a mix of first and second-year
students. Ten and Jaehyun approach them. Ten can distinctively see Doyoung among them,
because a giggling random girl tries to jump on his lap. This makes him fall back on the ground
and she is on top of him. She leans in for what can only be an attempt to kiss him, but Doyoung
puts his hands over his face.

Ten and Jaehyun are both paralyzed when they watch this, jaws dropped. Ten shoots a glance at a
reddened Jaehyun. Taeyong is the one that pulls the girl off Doyoung, who stands up flustered.
This is when he notices Jaehyun there and his face falls. He cuts his way to Jaehyun hurriedly.
Jaehyun clears his throat and schools his expression.

“She’s just drunk,” Doyoung says quickly.

“It’s okay,” Jaehyun says. “It’s not like we have anything.”

Ten’s heart clenches watching this. He wants to move away but can’t seem to do anything.

“We do,” Doyoung says.

“W-what?” Jaehyun stutters.

Doyoung takes Jaehyun’s hand.

“Come on, Jaehyunnie. You must know I like you.”

Ten smiles beside himself.

“You like me?” Jaehyun says slowly.

“Of course I do.” Doyoung gives him a peck. “Do you wanna get out of here?”

Jaehyun looks at Ten, who nods encouragingly.

“Okay,” Jaehyun says. He waves at Ten and leaves with Doyoung.

Ten stands there watching his friend go, intertwining his hand with Doyoung’s. Ten’s smiling to
himself, feeling silly.

“They look good together.” Someone startles Ten.

It’s Taeyong. Ten’s mood sours. He doesn’t answer.

“Do you want a sip?” Taeyong offers a bottle of vodka.

“Day drinking?” Ten asks, raising an eyebrow.

Taeyong shrugs and sips it. Sejin has hawk eyes on them from afar.

“I think your girlfriend misses you,” Ten says.

Taeyong huffs. “I don’t have a girlfriend.”

“Are you sure? She’s drilling a hole into your back.”

Taeyong peers into Ten with his gray eyes. From this close, under the sunlight, they look like
diamonds. Damn. He is pretty. The thought of fucking Taeyong that Jaehyun put in his head earlier
comes to the forefront of Ten’s mind. A flash of their bodies together, Ten getting lifted and fucked
against a wall. Would that feel good?

Ten clears his head and takes the bottle from Taeyong’s hand, drinking a couple of gulps of the
strong liquid. Oddly, Taeyong smirks. He gives the bottle back.

“Ten! Join us.” Johnny suddenly appears at their side.

Ten smiles a cracked smile, thinking back to Jungwoo kissing him last night. Ten knows Taeyong
is ogling him, can sense his eyes directed at his face.

“Sure,” Ten says.

The three rejoin the group. Ten stands by Johnny and Taeyong goes back to Sejin’s side, which
seems to please her greatly. She burrows herself under his arm. Jungwoo is here too, drinking like
the others. Ten analyzes him. He’s very handsome. His skin is much paler than Ten’s, lips fuller,
eyes bigger. Ten gets self-conscious about his own looks. It’s obvious why Johnny would rather
make out with Jungwoo than Ten.

Still, he pushes this aside and tries to pay attention to the conversation. Many people talk at the
same time, on different topics.

“What we need is people in charge that know what they are doing,” someone says. “Other
countries are closing their borders and gearing up for war right now while we sit on our asses.”

“As they should.”

“What do you mean, sitting on our asses? We are literally being groomed for war,” Johnny says.

“Not hard enough.”

Some nod in agreement. The conversation continues. Johnny turns to Ten and offers vodka. Ten
accepts and sips it.

“Did you have fun last night?” Ten asks in a spur-of-the-moment decision. He instantly regrets it.

“Yeah, I did,” Johnny answers. “Why?”

Ten passes him the bottle.

“Nothing.”
 “Did you?”

“Oh, yeah. Lots.”

Ten sneaks a glance at Johnny, biting down his lip. Maybe he should ask him to hang out one on
one, maybe…

“…disgusting refugees.”

Ten’s insides freeze. People in the group laugh.

“It’s not our responsibility to take care of them,” someone adds.

“They are illegals.”

It’s clear by the way they talk that they don’t know Ten’s nationality or status. He feels ill.

“I gotta go. Thanks for the drink, Johnny.”

Ten gives them his back and strides away. His eyes water against every ounce of his will. He
shouldn’t let these comments affect him.

He’s about to cross the door when someone comes through it, and they bump forcefully against it
each other. Ten falls on his back.

“Lee?”

Of course. What is Taeyong doing here of all places? Ten didn’t even notice when he left the
gardens.

Ten just keeps his face down as he gets up.

“Are you alright?” Taeyong asks, and his voice sounds borderline worried.

“I’m fine,” he mutters

Ten leaves without looking back.

Chapter End Notes

do you hear him besties? ten will literally fuck ANYONE else but lee taeyong
and in the next second he's picturing it LMAOOOO talk about eating your
words TEN LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

taeten interacting more closely next chapter!!!!!!!!!!!

 i can feel you sneakin’ in as if you are a mythical thing
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Winter break ends and the studies and training resume. The lack of sleep settles into Ten’s bones in
the first couple of weeks back. Their course load is heavy, both intellectually and physically
demanding. They study Corinthian and World History, Political Science, Sociology, Military Lore
and History, and Strategy. On top of that, they have a First Aid course during the first year of
school. And they have combat, cold weapons and firearms training. Ten isn’t as big as some of the
other students, but he’s agile and hard to hit. Whenever he got struck, it hurt like hell, so he avoids
that as best as he can. Needing to make a stop at the infirmary means losing classes.

Ten’s worse skill is certainly handling a gun. Even after a semester of school, he still gets jittery
around them, and misses most of his shots.

“Lee, you haven’t improved one bit over the break,” his teacher berates him during class.

“Yes, sir.”

“You need to log in hours at the practice range. Mandatory.”

Great. Now he’ll need to make time for that, probably cutting his hours of study short. But there is
no other way around it, he needs to get better.

Late at night, Ten gets to the shooting range, which is mostly empty. He logs out a weapon and
sets everything up at a booth. He puts the googles and headphones in, loads the gun. He aims and
fires a couple of shots. They are scattered on the target, everywhere but in the center. What a mess.
He keeps shooting until the clip is over. He loads another one.

“That doesn’t look good,” says a faint voice.

Ten turns around and finds Taeyong there, his charcoal uniform pristine, black faux-leather boots
polished, blond hair pulled back. Ten removes his headphones.

“What are you doing here?” he asks.

“I monitor the range some nights a week,” Taeyong explains. “Do you want some help?”

“No.”

Taeyong smirks. Ten fumes.

“I’m really good at it,” Taeyong says. “I can give you some pointers.”

Ten wants to shout at him to leave, but why is he having such a brash reaction? Ten takes a deep
breath. He is awful at this. He needs help.

“Alright.”

“Okay. First of all.” Taeyong approaches, taking the gun from Ten’s hand and putting it down. “I
get what you’re trying to do, but your posture can be improved.”

Ten bites back his tongue. Taeyong holds him by the hips and readjust him, doing the same for his
shoulders.

“Relax.”

Ten exhales loudly at the command. He stretches his neck, keeping his eyes on the target.

“You need to be balanced. What we want is stability,” Taeyong says. “Take the weapon.”

Ten obeys.

“Don’t be afraid. The gun is an extension of your arm. Think of it as part of you. Recognize its
weight, get familiar with it.”

Ten nods. Taeyong analyzes him.

“Hand higher on the handle. As high as you can.”

Ten does this. No one ever mentioned that detail to him before. Taeyong puts his arms around him,
his chest coming flush against Ten’s back. He places his hands on top of Ten’s, his face so close to
his nape Ten can feel his warm breath there.

“You know your breathing timing?” Taeyong asks.

“Yes.”

They lift their hands together.

“Aim,” Taeyong orders. “Take your time.”

Ten keeps breathing, and it syncs with Taeyong’s, their bodies moving together. He focuses his
eyes on the front sight.

“Okay,” Ten whispers.

“Shoot.”

BANG. The bullet hits under the center circle. Ten gapes. That’s the best shot he’s ever taken.

“Keep going. Empty the clip.”

Ten complies, refocusing on the task. As he finishes, there is a cluster of holes in the target. He’s
shocked. Taeyong steps back and Ten turns to face him. He realizes he misses the steadying
warmth of Taeyong behind him and scolds himself.

“Well done,” Taeyong says, his enigmatic gray eyes on him.

“Thank you,” Ten says sincerely. “I mean it. I am terrible at this.”

“You did great.”

Ten blushes slightly.

“I have to continue the rounds,” Taeyong says. “Good practice.”

He leaves.
“He did what?”

“Yeah. He helped me out, better than the teacher did,” Ten explains to Jaehyun.

“Wow. See. Maybe he’s not so bad.”

Ten rolls his eyes. “Just because he’s good with guns doesn’t mean I should sleep with him.”

“It shouldn’t? He handles barrels well,” Jaehyun says pointedly.

Ten laughs. “Are you sure he hooks up with guys, too?”

“He does. Doyoung told me.”

“Don’t tell me you were talking about that with him.”

“Not about you. We were just commenting on his friends.”

“Okay.”

In the next firearm class, the teacher praises Ten, and he steals a glance at Taeyong, thinking back
to his assistance.

February comes around and hushes of a party start making the rounds between some students.

“I can barely wait,” Jaehyun says.

“You just want to see Doyoung again,” Ten points out.

The two have been busy with their course load lately.

“Obviously,” Jaehyun huffs.

They arrive at Basement A. The place is crowded with music and loud chatter. Jaehyun pulls him
to the table with cocktails and pours them shots of vodka. Ten doesn’t hesitate now, just gulps it.
They drink another shot and pour a third.

“Hey, Jaehyun.” Doyoung appears with Taeyong and Seulgi by his side.

Jaehyun smiles and greets him with a kiss, while Seulgi scavenges through the bottles for
something to drink. Ten’s eyes stop at Taeyong for a moment. Seulgi whispers something in his
ear and they laugh. Taeyong doesn’t acknowledge Ten, even if he’s right there. This annoys Ten,
and he gets upset with himself for even bothering.

Jaehyun and Doyoung fall into their little world, trading kisses and caresses. Ten just sips his vodka
quietly, looking down.

Until a hand with a bottle shows up and fills his cup. It’s Taeyong. Ten looks at him, puzzled. First
he ignored him, now he gives him a drink. What’s his deal? Seulgi disappeared in the meantime.

“What do you want?” Ten asks.

“Just being a gentleman.”

Ten snorts a laugh. “Alright. Gentleman.”

Taeyong’s expression is impassive. Unaffected by Ten’s mockery. Ten finishes his drink and pours
another.

“What’s your deal?” Ten blurts out.

“What?” Taeyong frowns.

Before Ten can continue, Sejin magically appears throws herself at Taeyong, lips on his. Ten just
rolls his eyes and gulps down another shot. He turns his back to them and looks around. In a corner
of the room, he can see Johnny sitting with Jungwoo on his lap. Ten’s stomach gets heavy. He
moves away and gets lost in the crowd of people.

Ten keeps drinking vodka, not minding the burn it causes in his throat and stomach.

When he realizes he’s drunk, for the first time in his life, it’s too late to revert it. He’s losing his
balance, everything is spinning, he has a hard time focusing his gaze. He can’t find Jaehyun and
realizes he needs to go back to his dorm.

Ten stumbles through the people on his way to the door and makes his way up the stairs. It seems
so far away. On the last step, he trips forward.

“Hey.” Hands grab his arms and pull him up.

Ten is faced with a man he’s never seen, taller and stronger than him.

“What a pretty face,” he says, palms tightening on Ten’s flesh.

“Stop. Let me go,” Ten says, slurred.

“Wait just a second, beautiful.” He pulls Ten close.

“Stop!” Ten struggles against him, panic pulsing in his veins.

“Get off him.”

The man and Ten both look to the side from where the command came from. Taeyong.

“He said ‘stop’,” Taeyong states. “Fuck off, Choi.”

They know each other. Choi lets go of Ten.

“My bad, Taeyong.” And he is gone.

Ten realizes he’s shaking, feet rooted to the ground. Taeyong closes the distance between them.

“Are you alright?”

“No,” Ten says. He’s too drunk to lie.

“Let me take you back to the dorms,” Taeyong says.

Ten nods faintly. They start walking side by side, in silence. Ten hugs himself in a vain attempt to
regain control of his body. He feels almost unaware of his surroundings.

“How are you feeling?” Taeyong asks after a while.

“Sick.”
“Too much to drink?”

“Yes.”

Taeyong sighs. When they arrive at the dorm door, Taeyong opens it and follows Ten inside.

“Let’s go to the bathroom,” Taeyong says, and guides Ten there with a hand on the small of his
back.

They get to a stall and Taeyong helps Ten kneel.

“I’m gonna make you throw up,” Taeyong informs.

“What?” That sounds absurd.

“You’ll feel better. I promise.”

Ten tries to think, but his thoughts are jumbled. “Okay.”

He grabs the seat and leans his head towards it. Taeyong slides two fingers all the way into his
mouth. Ten heaves once, twice. On the third, everything comes up and Taeyong moves away from
him. Ten vomits.

When he’s done, he sits back down, panting. Taeyong offers him pieces of toilet paper. Ten cleans
his mouth. They stay there, seated across from each other, cramped in the tight space. Ten slowly
feels less shaken and lost. He sobers up, his mind clearing.

“Thank you,” he finally says.

“It’s no problem.”

“I’m serious,” Ten says. “I was too drunk to escape that guy.”

“I know. Do you feel better now?” Taeyong sounds genuinely worried.

"I do." Ten nods.

They fall silent again and a moment passes.

“How can I repay you?” Ten asks.

Taeyong studies him.

“Go out with me on the fourteenth.”

Ten’s jaw drops.

“What?”

“It’s a Saturday,” Taeyong says. “We can hang out in the afternoon.”

Ten is still processing this information. February fourteen is Valentine’s Day. Does Taeyong know
this?

“You just saw me vomit, yet you are asking me out? On a date?”

“Yeah.” Taeyong nods.

 “Is this your thing?” Ten asks.

“My what?” Taeyong smiles.

“You save helpless people and get sex in return.”

Taeyong laughs loudly. “Okay, first of all, who said anything about sex? Second, there aren’t
really that many helpless people around, so I wouldn’t bet my chances to have sex on that variant.”

“Okay. I will.”

“You will?”

“Let’s go out.”

Fuck it. Fuck Johnny. He is there with Jungwoo doing who knows what. Taeyong is here in front
of him and wants to hang out on Valentine’s Day, so why not?

Chapter End Notes

we are in! taeyong never misses his shots, besties, unless he wants to and he's not
missing out on taking this cute boy he's been noticing on a date

just a clarification though, since we don't get taeyong's pov: he was going to ask ten
out regardless of this drunk event. it would have happened eventually. but this was the
first time they were alone without ten being blatantly hostile towards taeyong
 if it’s all in my head, tell me now, tell me I’ve got it wrong somehow
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“He disappeared last night.”

Ten is sitting in the common room reading on his study tablet when he hears Sejin talk to her
friends.

“Maybe he just went to bed,” one of them says.

“What if he hooked up with someone else?” Sejin puffs.

“Well, it’s Lee Taeyong.”

Ten feels embarrassed both for himself and for Sejin. Because he’s agreed to go out with Taeyong.
And Sejin apparently is invested in a known fuck boy.

He makes a point to move away from them, sitting on another couch. He doesn’t want to continue
eavesdropping, as it will be hard to focus on his studies if he’s around them talking about Taeyong.

Later, Jaehyun shows up, yawning, his face puffy from sleep.

“Good morning.” Ten smiles.

“Good morning, Tennie.” He pats his head.

Jaehyun takes his side and Ten shuts the screen of the tablet.

“Did you have fun last night with your boyfriend?” Ten teases.

Jaehyun instantly blushes. “He’s not my boyfriend.”

“It’s just the matter of label now. He had no qualms admitting he likes you, in front of me no less.”

“I guess… Whatever. What about you?” Jaehyun changes the subject. “What did you do at the
party?”

“I…” Ten trails off and looks around. Sejin and her friends are gone. He lowers his voice to a
whisper. “I drunkenly accepted to go out on a date with Lee Taeyong on the fourteenth.”

Jaehyun drops his jaw and smiles, a mixture of glee and shock.

“Did you possess any intellectual faculties at the time?” he checks.

Ten sighs. “I was sober enough to remember everything. And that’s not the only thing that
happened.”

“Tell me,” Jaehyun urges.

So Ten just unloads everything. “I kind of crossed my drinking limit and got very drunk. When I
was leaving, some guy snatched me and wouldn’t let me go. So,” Ten says his name almost
inaudibly, “Taeyong showed up and rescued me. He told the guy to let me go. Then he escorted me
back to the dorms, helped me throw up. He stayed by my side through it. I’m so fucking
embarrassed.” Ten shakes his head.

“He asked you out… after seeing you vomit?” Jaehyun checks.

Ten hides his face in his hand. “Yeah. Did I make a mistake? Should I have not said yes?”

Jaehyun smiles softly, dimples showing. “Ten. That was actually very sweet.”

“You think so?”

“Yeah. Who knows? Maybe Taeyong has a heart of gold under all that lewdness.”

Ten laughs. “That doesn’t sound right.”

“Well? Are you going out with him or not?”

Ten worries his bottom lip.

“I guess I am.”

“You can always back down,” Jaehyun assures him. “But maybe giving him a chance won’t hurt. If
he just wanted you for sex, I don’t think he’d go out of his way to ask you on a date. That doesn’t
seem to be his style.”

Acknowledging this makes Ten nervous. But he thinks back to the night before and how it wasn’t
uncomfortable hanging out with Taeyong in the bathroom stall, even if it didn’t last long.

“I don’t wanna back down,” he affirms, more to himself than anybody. “And if he only wants sex, I
can just say no and move on with my life.”

“Or you can, you know, use him for sex like everybody else.” Jaehyun pokes at him, grinning.

“Stop.” Ten chuckles and grabs Jaehyun’s hand. “Maybe you should have sex.”

Jaehyun raises an eyebrow. “Who says I won’t?”

Ten gapes and they burst out laughing.

“I am honestly dying to try it out,” Jaehyun confesses. “Literally anything Doyoung does lights my
skin on fire.”

“Jaehyunnie, you horny slut,” Ten says affectionately.

Jaehyun puts a hand over his chest and gets serious. “I am a horny slut for Kim Doyoung.”

They laugh.

“Join me,” Jaehyun says. “Be a horny slut for Lee Taeyong.”

“I will do no such thing.”

“We should bet on it.”

“Bet what? I don’t have money.” Ten waves his hand around.

“Bet that you’ll do my Sociology homework for me for a month if you sleep with Taeyong.”
“Deal.” Ten offers his hand.

They shake on it.

After catching up on their studies, Jaehyun convinces Ten to go on a walk with him. Obviously he
wants to go see Doyoung, so Ten just complies. They find a group of second-year students in the
gardens, and Doyoung joins Ten and Jaehyun as they sit on the grass. The sky is cerulean, the wind
is soft. The weather at this time of the year is pleasant, not too cold, but not hot. Although Ten
sometimes misses his homeland’s scorching sun.

Jaehyun is explaining to Doyoung about how his birthday is on the fourteen, and Doyoung
suggests they spend the day in the town nearby. Ten is half paying attention to it, half looking
down at the green grass, spacing out.

Until someone sits by his side. Taeyong. He’s looking right at Ten, his gray eyes glinting under the
sunshine like two diamonds.

“How are you feeling?” he asks.

“Much better,” Ten answers.

“No hangover?”

“Not really.”

“Good. Have you eaten well?”

What’s with all the questions? Ten feels his belly flutter.

“No. I just snacked.”

Taeyong takes something red from his pocket and extends to Ten. It’s choco pie, a famous snack
that is prohibited on campus. Ten stares at it dumbly for a second but accepts it. Does Taeyong just
walk around with sweets on him all the time? The package has two choco pies. He opens and gives
one to Taeyong.

“No, it’s for you.” Taeyong denies it with a gesture.

“Come on, let’s share.” Ten smiles softly.

This tugs the corner of Taeyong’s mouth a bit, in a small but sweet smirk. “Okay.”

They eat their choco pies in silence as Jaehyun and Doyoung continue their conversation in their
own world. They are so obviously in love. Ten is happy about that. From afar, Ten notices that
Sejin is blatantly staring at their group. Ten wonders if Taeyong told her he’s going on a date with
someone else. But maybe that’s not their relationship? He is curious, but doesn’t want to butt in.
It’s only a date after all. It’s not like Ten is going to let Taeyong kiss him or take things further.

“Thank you for the sweet,” Ten says, turning his attention back to Taeyong.

“You’re welcome.” Taeyong nods politely. “So, I was thinking we could hang out together at the
gardens on Saturday. Is that okay?”

Ten imagined they would go to Delphi just like Jaehyun and Doyoung, maybe have something
special to eat, and not stay inside the Academy grounds. Ten quickly thinks about the implications
of this—does Taeyong want to be near a room where they can fuck? But then, why pick the
gardens, a very public place?

“Sure.”

“Two pm at the entrance hall?”

“Yes.”

They hold eye contact for a moment, not saying anything. A gust of wind ruffles their hair.

“Taeyong!” Someone shouts after him. They both turn their heads to see Yuta beckoning him over.
“Come play with us.”

Taeyong doesn’t respond or move until Johnny waves at him.

“Come on, Taeyong,” he says.

Ten hears Taeyong sigh and his lips flatten into a line.

“I’ll see you Saturday,” he tells Ten, gets up and heads towards the group of people.

Ten decides to just get back to the dorms after this. It’s getting late, and he’s tired. He wants to
lounge around on the common room for a while, maybe do some more reading.

The fourteen rolls along and as Ten wakes up, he’s immediately nervous. To make things worse,
Jaehyun climbs down from his bunk and sits on Ten’s bed with an apprehensive face.

“I have something to tell you,” he whispers.

Ten rubs the sleep out of his eyes.

“Sejin asked Taeyong out.” Jaehyun keeps his voice low enough that only the two of them can
hear.

Ten’s stomach drops. “What?”

“Doyoung was there when she did and he told me last night before I came back to sleep,” Jaehyun
explains. “And Taeyong said no. He said he already had plans for the fourteen with someone else.”

Ten just gapes, somehow not believing this.

“She didn’t react well and wanted to know who he was seeing.”

Ten bites down his lip nervously.

“He only said a first-year student,” Jaehyun continues. “The problem is, as I was sneaking back
into our room, I heard her talking to her friends. She said she’ll figure out whoever he’s seeing.”

Ten grimaces. “Oh, shit. Shit, shit, shit. What have I gotten myself into?”

Jaehyun pats his shoulder. “It’s okay. Just keep things on the down low.”

“How? People will eventually find out. Maybe I should call it off…” Ten’s pulse spikes.

“Why? Why are you afraid of her?”

 “What if she finds out I’m Dawi? And spreads it around? What if she beats the crap out of me?”

“Beats the crap out of you?” Jaehyun raises his brows.

“It’s not like I’m gonna fight a woman smaller than me,” Ten points out the obvious.

“She’s not that smaller than you,” Jaehyun says, motioning at Ten’s short body. Yes, he isn’t the
biggest dude on the planet.

“Even if she was a guy. It’s wrong.”

“She’ll get expelled if she attacks you,” Jaehyun insists. “She has nothing on you. She’ll just look
ridiculous no matter what she does, because Taeyong has no commitment to her.”

Ten weighs his friend’s words. Maybe he’s right. Maybe Ten is overthinking, letting panic
dominate him. He exhales hard.

“Come on, Tennie. Let’s get ready for the day and have fun.” Jaehyun smiles kindly.

Ten gets himself together. “Alright.”

Chapter End Notes

this is the start of the choco pie era

 when we were younger, down in the park
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten just came back into his dorm after a shower when he hears Sejin talk to her friends.

“I still can’t believe he asked someone else out after all the times we got together,” she is saying.

“You said you didn’t care,” one of them says. “You are going out with Yuta, anyway. Forget
Taeyong, he is a whore.”

“He is literally doing the same thing to you that he did to Ari.”

Ten tries to tune out their conversation as he gets dressed. Jaehyun lent him the nice black shirt that
is a tad large on him, but it’s better than anything he owns. He runs his fingers through his damp
hair and puts on his coat, leaving to have lunch with Jaehyun before his friend heads to Delphi.

“Happy birthday,” Ten says as he meets Jaehyun. They hug and Ten kisses his cheek.

“Thank you!”

They get their food and sit down to eat.

“Are you nervous?” Jaehyun asks, smiling, dimples on display.

“Kinda,” Ten confesses. “Are you?”

“Not really. Doyoung makes me feel comfortable.”

“You’re being too cute for lunchtime, you’ll make me hurl my meal,” Ten teases.

Jaehyun chuckles. “I am choosing to believe fate will show you the same kindness.”

“What do you mean?”

Jaehyun shrugs theatrically. “That you and Taeyong will get along.”

Ten shakes his head.

“Wouldn’t it be nice, though?” Jaehyun says. “The two of us, best friends, dating them, who are
also best friends.”

“Jaehyunnie, we are not in a drama.” Ten rolls his eyes.

“Whatever. Let me cling to nice things.”

“Okay. Just because it’s your birthday.”

They say their goodbyes and Ten goes back to the common room, which is empty, like most of the
Academy grounds. Apparently the majority of students are taking the opportunity to celebrate
Valentine’s Day. Ten entertains himself with his study tablet, and when it’s almost two pm he
heads to the entrance hall of the main buildings. He stands with his hands in his pockets, waiting
for Taeyong to show up.
Someone taps his shoulder. He turns around to find Taeyong there, gray eyes locked on his. Ten’s
breath hitches, but he quiets his reaction to Taeyong’s proximity, even if his sharp features are so
beautiful up close.

“Hey,” Taeyong says.

“Hey.”

“I brought you this,” Taeyong takes out a choco pie package from his pocket.

Ten purses his lips, trying not to smile. “Thanks.”

They stroll outside and towards the gardens as Ten opens the treat and bites into one of them.

“Is it good?” Taeyong asks.

“It’s great.” Ten offers his half-eaten choco pie to him.

Taeyong accepts and eats the rest. Ten saves the second one for later. He raises his eyes at
Taeyong, his side profile. The angles of his nose and jawline are so appealing. Ten has never seen
someone who looks like that. It’s almost like Taeyong is carved out of marble.

Distracted by Taeyong’s looks, Ten trips on a rock he doesn’t notice. Taeyong is fast to grab him
before he falls.

“Careful,” he says softly.

Ten blushes. “Thanks.” He straightens.

Taeyong takes Ten’s hand and starts pulling him along. “Come with me.”

Ten just follows, willing his cheeks to stop burning. How embarrassing to be so affected by
someone else helping him and holding his hand.

They reach a large tree and turn towards each other. Taeyong lets go of Ten.

“Can I ask you something?” Ten says before he stops himself.

“Sure.”

“Why me?”

“Why I asked you out?” Taeyong frowns slightly.

“Yeah.”

“Because I started to notice you.”

Ten keeps his expression still. “Notice me?” Taeyong nods. “Why?”

“If I tell you, you can’t judge me,” Taeyong says half-smiling, and Ten thinks he looks adorable
like that.

“I won’t judge you.”

“Promise?”
“Promise.”

“Well, it was during winter break,” Taeyong starts. “I was in Delphi with Doyoung, and he insisted
we do this stupid game with the soda tab rings.”

Ten is floored, paralyzed, astonished.

“You know about that game?” Taeyong asks.

“Yes.”

“Anyway. I got your initials,” Taeyong explains.

Ten panics. “Which initials?”

“T and L.”

This placates Ten’s despair. For a second he thought Taeyong knew his old name, the one he used
before he fled from war. When he got to Corinth, he made new documents and got a Corinthian
name, but Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul is still in the government files.

Taeyong continues. “I know it’s just a silly children’s game, but it made me… see you.”

“See me?”

“See you in a different light.”

“O-okay.”

They stare at each other in silence. Ten debates telling him about his own ring tabs, the ones sitting
in his pocket right now. Wouldn’t it be funny? But he can’t bring himself to do it for some reason.
It finally clicks that they have the same initials, T and L.

“What did you see?” Ten asks. “When you saw me.”

Taeyong studies Ten’s face, which makes him lose his breath.

“Something different. Someone different.”

Ten’s stomach churns. This sounds alarm bells in Ten’s mind because it makes him think about his
appearance and if he looks too Dawi, and if Taeyong knows his refugee status. He can’t know, but
still.

Dawis share some phenotypical traits with Corinthians, like slanted eyes. People from Daw like
Ten have strictly darker shades of hair and eyes, while Corinthians can have that too, but also
lighter shades of hair and eyes, like Taeyong—blond with gray irises. And Corinthians are usually
paler.

Maybe Ten is overthinking, and it has nothing to do with looks or his nationality, and he’s losing
his mind.

“Can I be frank?” Taeyong asks.

“Yes.” Ten’s voice is weak.

“I am sure you know about my reputation,” Taeyong says. “Because, well, everybody does.”
“Yeah, I do.” Ten nods.

“I fuck around,” Taeyong admits. “As do a lot of people here. I’m not ashamed of that. I’m honest
about what I want from people whenever it happens. I am safe, and we are all chipped.” The chip
is the government mandated birth control applied on males when they turn thirteen, which halts
spermatozoid production completely, reversible and one-hundred percent effective. Females are
also chipped when they get their first period. “But what I wanna say is, this isn’t what I’m doing
now with you.”

Ten processes this. “It… isn’t?”

“No.”

“What is it that you want from me, then?”

Taeyong chuckles. “What do you think I want?”

“I have no idea anymore,” Ten says honestly.

“I’m curious about you. I wanna get to know you,” Taeyong says this with the kindest eyes Ten
has ever seen on him yet.

Ten almost lets out a sigh but controls himself. “Okay. I’m up for that.”

Taeyong smiles. “Then sit down with me.”

They do that, leaning against the tree, shoulders bumping.

“Well, it’s my turn to be honest,” Ten says, pulling his knees against his chest and putting his
palms over them.

“Shoot.”

“You’re actually nicer than I thought,” Ten admits.

Taeyong laughs.

“I guess I did judge you for your… sexual history.”

“I get that,” Taeyong says.

“And because people say you come from money,” Ten adds.

“Yeah. I do.”

Ten steals a glance at him.

“I’m dirt poor,” Ten confesses, and it pains him a little to say it out loud.

“I don’t care,” Taeyong says.

This placates some of Ten’s nervousness around the subject.

“What do you plan on doing after you graduate?” Ten asks.

“Continue my studies,” Taeyong says. “My parents can afford to put me through Peitharchía.”
The Peitharchía Institute. You can only attend if you have the money or get a grant at the end of
the Academy—either way, you need an amazing track record. The top five students of each
graduate class get scholarships. The Peitharchía is where you specialize in Military Science, and
pledge a field, like National Defense, Engineering, Cybersecurity, Strategy, Policy, Intelligence
and Counterintelligence, etc. It’s where all the military leaders and politicians in the country come
from. Corinth became a stratocracy decades ago, and because of that the power rests in the hands
of the ones that go through the training in the Peitharchía. The culture surrounding this portrays the
system as a meritocracy, but basically only the wealthy can attend the Institute, so it’s a skewed
structure. The ones that finish the Academy without a grant or chance to go to Peitharchía either get
drafted into compulsory military service, get regular jobs or attend regular university. But the
whole point of Corinth is getting every citizen three years of basic military training, no matter what
career you may want after the Academy.

“I’m vying for a grant,” Ten says. “Otherwise I’m probably getting drafted.”

Taeyong is staring at him with those curious gray eyes. Ten regards him.

“What do you think about the Academy?” Taeyong asks.

“It’s tough. But I try my hardest.”

“How is your shooting going?”

This makes Ten blush, smile, and lower his face, trying to hide, as he remembers the time Taeyong
helped him with his firearm practice. Taeyong gently places his index finger under Ten’s chin and
lifts his head back up.

“Don’t hide. You look pretty when you blush.”

Ten just flusters further, rendered speechless. Taeyong smirks.

“We can practice more if you want,” Taeyong offers, taking his hand back.

“I’d would love that,” Ten answers honestly. He needs all the help he can get, and he won’t mind
spending time with Taeyong. He’s realizing he likes his company.

They fall silent. Ten looks ahead, taking in the greenery around them, the enormous concrete
building in the distance. Suddenly he feels an arm wrap around his shoulders and his stomach and
skin alight. He fits well next to Taeyong, whose palm closes on him comfortably. Jaehyun has
hugged Ten often, but this feels different. Ten risks looking at Taeyong and realizes he’s staring
back at him. With those gray eyes, his expression relaxed. Taeyong takes in all of Ten’s face, from
his lips back to Ten’s eyes. Taeyong’s hand climbs up to Ten’s neck, giving him goosebumps. This
close, Ten can see Taeyong has a scar near his eye. His lips are so full and pretty. Maybe…

Taeyong leans in. Ten’s breath hitches, and he allows Taeyong to close the distance until their
noses are touching. Ten’s eyes fall shut.

“TEN!”

The scream startles them apart. Ten looks for the source. It’s Jaehyun, marching in his direction,
with Doyoung in tow. Jaehyun looks rattled, his hair all over the place, and he’s heaving. He
probably ran all the way here. Ten stands and rushes towards him.

“What happened?” Ten urges.

 “Delphi was attacked.”

Chapter End Notes

i am dying to know what you think of this side taeyong is showing now also loving
the comments you are leaving!!
 the sight that flashed before me was your face
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“Delphi was attacked.”

Ten processes what Jaehyun said. “What?”

“A bomb went off,” Jaehyun explains. “Not far from where we were.”

“Jaehyun.” Ten grabs his arms and realizes he’s shaking. Ten rubs him up and down, then pulls
him into a hug. They cradle each other, and Ten can feel Jaehyun letting out a quiet sob. Ten’s own
eyes are filling with tears, terrified at the idea that he could lose his best friend.

Meanwhile, Taeyong and Doyoung stay quiet.

When Ten and Jaehyun finally pull apart and he checks his surroundings, he notices how Taeyong
and Doyoung are locked in a weird staring contest, both expressions dark.

“We should head inside and see if we can help with anything,” Ten suggests. The Academy is the
closest thing to a hospital in the area, with a well-equipped and large infirmary, and all students
have first-aid training.

Everyone nods and starts heading back to the main building. Doyoung passes his arm around
Jaehyun as they walk, and Taeyong gets beside Ten, but no one says anything.

There are a lot of students gathered in the entrance hall, many scared faces and panicked chatter.
They stand around there waiting for a faculty member to come talk to them.

After an hour, they are informed no one survived the attack. Six people died, two students. A video
was sent to the media where the neofascist group Red Stain claimed the responsibility for the
attack.

Ten gulps, cold sweat pooling on his nape. This triggers all the alarm bells in Ten’s mind. The Red
Stain is an extremist group that has been on the rise, and their purpose for existing is demanding
the Corinthian government to stop accepting refugees, immigrants, and patrol their borders better
so illegals can’t cross. Their reason is their country shouldn’t make room for outsiders, especially
when Corinth has such strict policies on natality. To achieve their goals, the Red Stain spreads
terror. Part of the people of Corinth may dislike foreigners and want them gone, but most will
compromise to accept—albeit ostracize—the ones like Ten that have been there for years and are
legally documented. The Red Stain, however, is the epitome of radical xenophobia, with violent
ends.

Suddenly Taeyong intertwines their hands, and this brings Ten back from the spiraling mess that
was possessing his thoughts. He tries to pace his agitated breath.

Everyone is sent to their dorms. At night, Ten can’t sleep. Knowing people like the Red Stain are
out there petrifies him. They are the ones that hate and execute people like Ten, that claim Corinth
should be pure-blooded. They are fascists.

Days pass and fear seems to cling to Ten’s gut. He tosses and turns, only getting superficial sleep
that does nothing to placate his exhaustion. Whenever he looks at Jaehyun, he needs to stop himself
from bursting into tears, horrified at the idea that his best friend was near the attack’s site. He can’t
lose Jaehyun.

Something that surprises Ten is his next firearms class. When he picks up his Glock and shoots, he
gets a release of everything that’s been piling up inside him. He empties his entire clip, without a
blink, without taking a breath. The emotional discharge sends a ripple effect through his body, and
he finally feels less tense. This makes him go to the shooting range every night after his studies,
where he unloads bullet after bullet on the target.

“You are much better.”

Ten turns around to find Taeyong there, standing with his hands behind his back, combed blond
hair and perfectly pressed charcoal uniform.

“Thanks,” Ten says.

“It’s almost midnight,” Taeyong points out.

“Oh. I didn’t notice.”

Taeyong steps closer, his eyes on Ten’s face.

“How are you feeling?” he asks.

“I—” Ten can’t go on. He can’t say he’s fine, but can’t admit how scared he’s been. He just falls
silent.

Taeyong studies him. “Come with me.”

“Where?”

“Trust me.”

Ten is surprised by the fact that he trusts Taeyong enough to accompany him. So he does. He logs
the gun back in and they leave the shooting range together, going back to the main building. They
are silent, but Ten doesn’t mind. He’s too tired to talk. They make their way to the dorms but take a
turn to a different corridor until a door. Taeyong grabs a key from his pocket and unlocks it.

Ten steps into the dark room first. Taeyong comes next, closing the door behind him, and turns on
the bedside lamp. Ten checks the place out. It’s a bedroom, not too big, but not small. It has a
double bed in a corner, a desk, and a wardrobe.

“What’s this?” he asks.

“My room.”

“You have your own room?” Ten frowns.

“Perks that come with being a teacher’s assistant,” Taeyong explains. “You can sit.”

Ten sits on the bed. Taeyong has stripped off his boots and his uniform shirt, revealing a white t-
shirt underneath. He kneels in front of Ten.

“May I?” He points at Ten’s boots.

Ten finds the request strange but just nods. Maybe Taeyong doesn’t like dirty soles in his room.
Taeyong unties the laces and removes the shoes, setting them aside. Then he lies down on the bed.
Ten looks at him curiously. Taeyong taps the place beside him.

“Come here.”

Something awakens in Ten’s core, which had been dormant since the terrorist attack. He hesitates,
but ultimately complies. Taeyong lands his palm on Ten’s arm, massaging the flesh. They stare
into each other’s eyes.

“You’re safe here,” Taeyong whispers.

The words seep into Ten and reach his heart, producing a calming effect, like magic. Immediately
Ten’s eyelids droop.

“You can sleep,” Taeyong says. “I’ll be here.”

Under the careful ministration of affection on his arm and Taeyong’s gray eyes, Ten lets himself
fall into the abyss of slumber.

“You slept in his bed?” Jaehyun screeches.

“Be quiet!” Ten says through his teeth as they eat breakfast. “No one can know this. Specially…”
Ten nods to Sejin who is sitting a couple of feet away. “But yes. I did.”

He blacked out last night, the type of sleep that leaves you completely refreshed. Ten feels much
better than he has in days.

“I think it was the most intimate thing I ever shared with someone that wasn’t a friend or family,”
Ten confesses in a murmur.

“Tennie!” Jaehyun smiles and pinches his cheek, making Ten laugh. “I’m happy for you.”

Ten clears his throat. “Have you heard if… if Taeyong hooked up with anyone lately?” As he asks
this, Ten feels stupid. He knows they have no commitment to each other. But he’s curious,
anyway.

Jaehyun smiles knowingly. “I asked Doyoung, actually.”

“And?”

“Apparently Ari sneaked into Taeyong’s room and waited naked in his bed for him.”

Ten almost chokes on his food and starts coughing.

“W-what?!” Ten blushes.

“Yeah.”

“Why didn’t you tell me that?”

“I just found out about it,” Jaehyun explains. “But he kicked her out.”

“He did?”
 Jaehyun nods. “You have mashed potato on your face.”

Ten wipes his mouth quickly. Jaehyun is watching him through a squint.

“You like him,” Jaehyun says.

Ten gulps. Does he?

“He caught my interest,” he admits.

Jaehyun chuckles. “I’m gonna win our bet.”

“Oh, fuck off!” Ten pushes him away playfully and they burst out laughing. “Actually, with
everything that happened, I forgot to say something crucial.”

“What?”

“Taeyong told me he and Doyoung played the soda ring tab game during winter break, and he got
my initials. T and L,” Ten says. “I know it’s not my birth name, but it’s been my official name
since I was thirteen years old.”

Jaehyun is gaping. “No way.”

“Yeah. I mean, why would he make that up? He has no idea we did the same thing. Right?”

“I never mentioned to Doyoung,” Jaehyun assures him. “I can’t believe this. I also don’t believe
it’s a coincidence.”

“Jaehyunnie, don’t be delusional. It’s just a game.” Ten dismisses him with a wave.

“There are no such things as coincidences.” Jaehyun beams.

Maybe.

Chapter End Notes

non-sexual intimacy we love that for them.

 showed you all of my hiding spots
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“A party?” Ten is in disbelief.

“People just wanna drink to forget what happened,” Jaehyun says.

“Denial,” Ten says.

“I guess. We should go, though. Live life to the max until something takes it away.”

Now the threat that something might happen to actually end their lives is teeming. Maybe drinking
their sorrows is not that bad of an option. Ten just can’t drink as much as he did last party.

Ten and Jaehyun reach Basement A, grab drinks, and mingle with the usual crowd. There aren’t
many people around tonight. Ten sips his vodka for a while until he sees Taeyong cutting through
the room in his direction, eyes fixed on him. Ten perks up. His feet are moving towards Taeyong
before he can think twice.

But something halts Taeyong and pulls him around. Ten stops in his tracks.

“What?” he hears Taeyong ask.

“Why are you acting like this?” It’s Seulgi.

“Like what?”

“Doing charity cases. Do you pity him or something?”

Ten’s stomach drops.

“Seulgi…” Taeyong chides.

“He’s not at your level, Taeyong, and you know that. It’s okay to fuck around with anyone, but
why waste time getting to know him?” she continues relentless, but her voice is steady, rational.
“Are you doing this just to spite your father?”

“I don’t give a shit about my father,” Taeyong objects. “Now go fuck Irene and leave me alone.”

With that, Taeyong gives her his back. Ten tries to school his expressions as Taeyong closes the
distance between them.

“Hey.” Taeyong smiles.

“Hi,” Ten says weakly, trying to smile too, but he’s faltering.

“Do you wanna dance?”

“W-what?”

“Come on. This song is fun.”

Taeyong takes Ten’s vodka and finishes it in one gulp, leaving it aside on a table. He grabs Ten’s
hand and pulls him towards the middle of the room. They stand in front of each other and Ten
doesn’t move, still processing what was happening.

“Need a pair?” he asks, pulling Ten close by the waist.

Their bodies come together and Ten loses his breath. Taeyong moves and Ten moves along with
him. Ten takes a second to react but puts his hands on Taeyong’s shoulders.

They are dancing, glued together, in front of everyone that cares to pay attention to them. What if
Sejin sees something? Or Ari? Still, looking into Taeyong’s gray eyes, Ten can’t seem to worry too
much about that anymore.

As they dance, Ten relaxes in his arms. Taeyong catches his hand and turns him around, bringing
chest and back together. He puts his hands on Ten’s hips as they sway. Ten can feel Taeyong’s
face next to his nape, and this sends a shiver through his body. Ten wants to shut his eyes and let
the moment take him away, but something prevents this from happening.

Taeyong’s nose brushes against the curve of his neck, and Ten thinks he might melt into nothing,
his flesh all mushy. He never felt anything remotely like this. Ten turns again and they face each
other, close, his arms wrapping around Taeyong’s neck.

“Taeyong—”

Someone bumps into them, and they jump apart, liquid spilling all over Ten’s shirt—actually
Jaehyun’s.

“Ops.”

Ten finds none other than Sejin.

“I didn’t see you, I’m sorry,” she says in a fake but sweet voice.

Ten is speechless. Taeyong is glaring at her, and she won’t just leave.

“Taeyong, long time no see,” she continues.

“Do you need anything?” Taeyong finally asks. When Sejin takes a while to answer, Taeyong
grabs Ten’s hand. “Excuse us.”

He pulls Ten away towards the exit of the basement. Ten is still too shocked to react, but he’s on
board with leaving this place after what happened. They climb the stairs and stop.

“Are you okay?” Taeyong asks.

“Yeah, just wet.”

“Do you wanna get out of here? We can head to my room.” Taeyong suggests.

“Yes,” Ten answers without hesitation.

So they leave together. It doesn’t take long until they are in the privacy of Taeyong’s room. Ten
starts untying his boots.

“You’re wearing uniform boots on a weekend,” Taeyong points out as he takes off his pair of
loafers. He probably noticed before, but never said anything.
Ten blushes. “It’s my only pair. I had to throw out my tennis because they had a hole in the sole.”

“Oh. Do you want to borrow a t-shirt?”

“That would be great, thanks.”

Taeyong picks up a black tee from his wardrobe and hands it over to Ten, who quickly strips the
wet shirt and gets dressed again. Taeyong sits on the bed and stares at Ten, who’s still standing by
the door. Taeyong gives him a small smile. Ten remembers how they were just dancing, molding
together like two parts of the same thing, and his belly flutters. He sits beside Taeyong. A moment
of stillness passes.

Until Ten turns his body to him and leans in slowly, taking in his sharp features, his gray eyes, his
combed blond hair. He decides to just take a leap and see how Taeyong reacts. He will give him
ample space to reject him. Ten lands one hand on Taeyong’s knee, their noses almost touching,
Ten’s lids almost falling shut. He stops there, waiting for Taeyong to fill in the gap between them.
Taeyong’s fingertips brush Ten’s cheek tenderly before he seals their lips together. Taeyong’s
mouth is warm, steady, while Ten is colder, trembling. As they kiss, Ten’s flesh is overtaken by
goosebumps. He’s floating into space. Taeyong sucks Ten’s lips softly, and Ten reciprocates. Their
tongues carefully drag on each other, wet and smooth. Taeyong hooks his hand on Ten’s nape,
upping the intensity of the kiss. Ten allows Taeyong to guide, and surrenders.

Taeyong stops the kiss, and they part to look at each other. His thumb caresses Ten’s neck.
Taeyong smiles.

“Was that okay?” Ten asks in a hoarse voice.

Taeyong smiles wider. “Yes. Was this your first kiss?”

“Yeah.” Ten nods.

“It was perfect,” Taeyong says earnestly. He gives him a peck. “Lay down with me.”

They move around and get on the bed, side by side. Taeyong runs his hand through Ten’s black
hair, a calm-inducing touch. Ten reaches for his cheek and caresses it—his skin is so soft. They
trade gentle affection for a while. Everything about this is brand-new to Ten, and he relishes it.

“Tell me something about you,” Ten breaks the silence.

“What do you want to know?”

“Anything.”

“I love animals,” Taeyong says and Ten is happily surprised.

“I have two cats back home. Adoptees I got off the streets.”

Taeyong smiles. “I wanted to be a veterinarian.”

“Why won’t you?” Ten wonders.

Taeyong sighs. “Because I have obligations.”

“What kind?”

“My father wants me to work with him. He owns a lot of businesses. But I plan to convince him to
let me go to Peitharchía.”

“My dad is a cook,” Ten says. They used to own their restaurant in Daw, but now his father works
in a small shop and doesn’t make a lot of money. He won’t reveal this to Taeyong, though. “My
mom is a cleaning lady.” That’s the only job she managed to get in Corinth as a refugee. They were
way past the age to get into the Academy, and that’s why they didn’t. “I think they’ll just be happy
with any job I’m content doing.”

“My mother was in the army, but had to retire for medical reasons,” Taeyong says. “I had a sister.”

Ten stills. “Had?”

Taeyong nods. Ten’s mind does a turn. “Me too.”

“What?” Taeyong asks.

“Yeah. She passed when I was eleven,” Ten says. She died as a consequence of the war that
plagued his home continent. He grieved her for so long, still does, still misses her every day, and it
is still weird to say it out loud.

“Mine when I was eight,” Taeyong explains. “The four of us were in the car. The other driver was
drunk. She died. My mom was disabled. I got this.” He points at the scar by his eye.

“Taeyong…” Ten murmurs. He hugs him. “I’m sorry,” he says against his neck.

Taeyong holds him back tightly. “I’m sorry too.”

What a sick coincidence that they both lost their sisters in a tragic way. Ten can’t imagine the
survivor’s guilt Taeyong must endure until now.

“The world can be a cold place,” Ten whispers.

Taeyong exhales, long and loud. “It can. Your hug makes it better, though.”

Ten smiles and burrows himself into Taeyong. He is right. The hug makes things less awful.

They spend hours talking and fall asleep in each other’s arms.

When Ten wakes up, he sees Taeyong is already alert, staring at the ceiling, but still tangled up in
Ten.

“Hey,” Ten calls his attention.

Taeyong turns to him and smiles softly. Leans in for a peck. “Hey. We missed breakfast.”

Ten’s stomach is empty.

“I have a solution,” Taeyong says and reaches for the bedside table. He grabs a choco pie.

Ten chuckles. They open the package, and each gets one.

“You have a stock of them?” Ten asks.

“Yes. I have a sweet tooth.”

They smile at each other. After the snack, they lounge on the bed, lying on their backs, hands
intertwined playfully.

“What do you like being called?”

“I like my name,” Ten answers. “Jaehyun calls me Tennie sometimes.”

“That’s adorable.”

“What about you?”

“People usually call me Taeyong. I like Yongie, though. But only Doyoung does that, not often.”

“Yongie. I like that. Can I use it?”

“As you wish.”

“Tell me something weird about you.”

“I have mysophobia.”

“What’s that?”

“Fear of contamination and germs. I wash my hands and my clothes a lot.”

“Your room is very clean,” Ten points out. “Very organized.”

“Thank you. I try. Now you tell me something.”

“I am a terrible cook,” Ten confesses and laughs. “I know, it’s ridiculous. My dad tried to teach me
as I grew up. But I always end up messing it up. It’s a disaster.”

Taeyong chuckles. “I don’t cook often, because I never really have to, but when I do people give
me compliments.”

“Who did the cooking in your house?”

“The staff.”

Ten looks at him. “Staff?”

“Yeah. Why?” Taeyong looks back at Ten.

“That sounds fancy.”

Taeyong shrugs.

“You really are wealthy,” Ten points out.

“I am.”

That makes Ten nervous for some reason. He feels a bit inadequate. Taeyong pulls him close.

“I promise I’m very down-to-earth,” he says.

“You seem like that,” Ten admits.

Taeyong gives him a peck. “We should head to lunch. Unless you want to live off choco pies.”
 They laugh.

“Okay. Let’s go.”

They kiss before getting up and ready to leave.

Chapter End Notes

first kiss!!!!!!!!!! and some trauma bonding bc why not

 but there was happiness because of you
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

When Ten and Taeyong arrive at the refectory, they soon spot Jaehyun and Doyoung eating
together. They get food and join them.

“Where have you two been?” Doyoung asks, humor in his voice.

“Hanging out,” Taeyong answers. “How was the party?”

“Alright,” Doyoung says. “You’ll be happy to know Sejin finally hooked up with another guy.”

Ten tries not to show any reaction to this. Taeyong also keeps a chill expression while he eats.
Jaehyun is grinning, though, looking from Ten to Taeyong and back.

“Johnny invited us to hang out at the gardens,” Doyoung says. “Do you two want to go?”

Ten and Taeyong trade looks.

“I don’t mind,” Ten says. He just needs to study later.

After the meal, they serve themselves some steaming black coffee and head out. They sit near the
training grounds. They chat about nothing in particular, classes and homework. Soon, students
show up and gather around. Johnny and Jungwoo come up to them.

Ten has the realization that whatever feelings he had for Johnny have evaporated completely. It’s
funny. It really was just a silly crush.

Everyone is talking, but Ten keeps to himself, too distracted. He’s going over the events from the
last hours with Taeyong, how good it felt to hang out and open up to each other.

After finishing his coffee, Ten needs to use the restroom. The lockers from the training grounds are
near and open, so he heads there. Ten grabs the red soda ring tab that represents the J that has still
been in his pocket all this time and throws it out.

He’s washing his hands when the door opens. Who he sees surprises him.

Seulgi. The girl has long brown hair with bangs, built smaller than Ten but not weak by any means.
Her face is a blank mask. They both know this is the men’s room, yet she’s here, obviously came
looking for Ten. So he just stays quiet and stares at her.

“I don’t know why Taeyong is wasting his time with you,” she starts. “What I know is that you can
barely afford the clothes on your back. And Taeyong is rich.”

She looks him up and down. Ten just focuses on not letting his emotions show in any way.

“Also, I asked around,” she continues. “And you’re…” she smiles, like it amuses her so much. “A
virgin.”

She tilts her head.

“I feel sorry for you. Taeyong is after one thing and one thing only. He commits to no one.” A
pause. “You’re not gonna get anything out of this, except get hurt. So for your own good, walk
away.”

With that, she leaves.

Ten takes a deep, trembling breath, shutting his eyes. He just had his ass handed to him by Seulgi.
He didn’t even protest. But what would he say? That no? He’s not poor? He is. That Taeyong isn’t
rich? He is. That Ten isn’t a virgin? He is. Ten is just glad she doesn’t know he’s a refugee,
otherwise it would add to the pile of ‘insults’.

What Ten wants to believe is that she’s wrong about Taeyong wanting only one thing. Sex. He
could have easily made a move on Ten by now. They kissed—only after Ten made a move—,
shared a bed twice, yet they spent significantly more time talking. Taeyong can have anyone he
wants, that much is clear by now. If what Jaehyun said was true, Ari obviously would fuck
Taeyong again. Sejin purposely spilled a drink at Ten last night just because he was dancing with
Taeyong, so it clearly bothers her losing Taeyong’s attention. Taeyong isn’t busy spinning a yarn
with these girls, convincing them to get in bed with him with lies of commitments or feelings. It
isn’t his modus operandi. So if he only wanted sex, why would he waste his time bonding with Ten
when there are suitors readily available to get in bed with him?

Ten isn’t completely oblivious. He’s seen affection before. He’s seen the way his parents treat each
other, how they hug and laugh together. Even after all the adversities, they love each other, and
Ten was taught what true love is like by watching. He knows he and Taeyong aren’t in love, but he
also knows that the way Taeyong chooses to treat and touch him shows he cares about him.

Whatever thing that sparked between Ten and Taeyong is enough for him to trust his gut about
this, to give it a chance. If he gets hurt eventually, well, that’s what people get for putting
themselves out there. If he’s old enough to hold a firearm, he’s old enough to pursue a relationship.

Ten comes out of the restroom with an impassive expression. He heads towards Taeyong.

“Hey. I’m going back to my dorm,” he says.

“Oh.” Taeyong gets up. “I can walk you.”

They say goodbye to the people around and leave.

“Did something happen?” Taeyong asks when they are out of earshot.

Should he tell him?

“For the sake of honesty, which I think is a good precedent for us to have, yes.”

“What?” Taeyong asks, sounding worried.

“Seulgi came to see me while I was in the bathroom.”

Taeyong sighs, frustrated. “I’m sorry. She thinks she’s being protective.”

“Do you need protection?” Ten asks.

“No,” Taeyong says. “What did she say?”

“The obvious. That I’m poor, you’re rich, you just wanna use me for sex.”

“You know that last statement is not true, right?”

 “I do.” Ten nods. “Why would you pursue a broke virgin when you can literally have anyone in
this school.” It isn’t even a question.

Taeyong laughs. “Who says I can have anyone?”

“Oh, please. You know you can. If people aren’t attracted to your looks, the fat wallet must be
sexy. Plus, you always seem to have sweets stuffed in your pockets.”

“I only share my sweets with one person,” Taeyong says.

Ten smiles, silly. “It’s your most attractive quality.”

They chuckle. Taeyong passes an arm around Ten’s back.

“I don’t care if you’re rich or not, by the way,” Ten feels like he needs to make it clear. “What I
value are kind and hardworking people.” The sad truth is he got used to living with little to no
material possessions. There are so many things worse than not having money. He would trade all
the money in the world to have his sister back, to not have his home country ravaged by war. The
Dawi currency is literally extinct by now.

“Thank you for saying that,” Taeyong says. “I won’t stop feeding you choco pies, though.”

“Sounds like a great deal.” Ten grins.

When they get back to Ten’s dorm, Taeyong cups the younger’s face in between his hands and
kisses him. They linger there, not taking it deeper. They shouldn’t kiss or show much affection
inside the main building where people patrol the halls—it’s against student conduct.

“I’d love to spend more time with you, but I have to study,” Ten explains when they part.

“Maybe we can study together some time,” Taeyong suggests. “Just keep each other company.”

Ten smiles. “I’d be up for that.”

After one last kiss, they say goodbye, and Ten walks inside, feeling terribly giddy.

Chapter End Notes

cutieeeeeeees

i swear seulgi is a nice person. but she is skeptical as fuck and you'll know why later.
 sorry for not winning you an arcade ring
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Months ago.

“Ten who?”

“Ten Lee,” Doyoung repeats himself.

The best friends are in Delphi during winter break, sitting on a bench after drinking sodas and
playing the ring tab game because Doyoung insisted. Taeyong stares at the aluminum tabs on his
palm that resulted from it. They are black and silver.

“Who’s Ten Lee?” he asks.

“He’s Jeong Jaehyun’s friend,” Doyoung explains like it’s obvious.

“Who’s Jeong Jaehyun?” Taeyong frowns.

Doyoung rolls his eyes. “You’re such a shitty friend.”

“I am not,” Taeyong protests and smiles. “I taught you everything you know about sex.”

Just theoretically, but by what Johnny and Yuta said, Doyoung did very well.

“Shut up,” Doyoung says. “Jaehyun is the freshman I am crushing on, you idiot.”

“Oh! Yeah, I remember you mentioned him. I just forgot his name.” Taeyong shrugs.

“The only thing you seem to remember is where to put your dick in,” Doyoung taunts.

“What, like it’s hard?” Taeyong deadpans.

Doyoung starts laughing, shaking his head, and Taeyong giggles along.

“Anyway. Why did you make me do this stupid game?” Taeyong asks.

“Just because. Keep them.”

“No, it’s trash,” Taeyong motions to throw them out, but Doyoung snaps his wrist.

“Don’t litter,” Doyoung chides him. “Just keep them in your pocket until we are back to the
Academy at least.”

Taeyong acknowledges he should do that and complies, shoving them in his pocket mindlessly.

“We should head back,” Doyoung says.

They get up and start the walk towards the school.

“I’m gonna tell Johnny to ask Jaehyun and Ten to the party tonight,” Doyoung explains.

“Oh, so you are making a move on him?”

“Of course I am. He’s the hottest person I’ve ever seen.”

Taeyong chuckles. “Good for you, brother.”

“Maybe you should chat Ten up. He’s not bad looking.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen him before,” Taeyong says.

“You just don’t remember him because you only pay attention to the long queue of people lining
up to suck your dick,” Doyoung argues.

Taeyong just flattens his lips and raises his shoulders defensively. It’s not like his life revolves
around sex—his studies are his priority. But the Academy is stressful, and fucking is a good stress
reliever.

They find their classmates and get in line to enter the Academy. Everyone is chatting when
Doyoung elbows Taeyong.

“There he is,” he says. “The one with the red scarf and black hair, beside the tall one with brown
hair.”

Taeyong looks for the person with that description. He finds him easily because Ten just tripped
and Jaehyun caught him. When Ten straightens, he looks at Taeyong, but soon breaks eye contact.

“So, what do you think? Your next victim?” Doyoung jests.

Taeyong just keeps watching Ten from afar.

“What? Taeyong has a next victim already?” Johnny asks. Everyone laughs. They all fuck around,
but somehow Taeyong is always the butt of the joke on the subject.

“Shut up,” Taeyong answers, finally pulling away from Ten.

They eventually get inside the Academy grounds and into the main building, where they stand in
the entrance hall talking. When Taeyong sees Ten come inside, they trade another look. Now that
Taeyong saw him closer, he realizes Ten is gorgeous. Something about him stands out to Taeyong.
He doesn’t know what exactly, though. Maybe he needs to look again to figure it out, but Ten soon
disappears towards the cantina.

Present day.

After a busy week, Ten and Taeyong finally get to meet on a Saturday. Ten is waiting for him in
the entrance hall when Taeyong arrives, a big smile on his face. Ten smiles back like second
nature.

“Hey. How are you?” Taeyong asks as they start walking out.

“Tired. But glad we can hang out,” Ten says. “How are you?”

The day is beautiful, with cerulean skies and warm weather comfortable enough to forgo coats.
“I’m good,” Taeyong answers. “Happy to see you.”

Ten blushes and looks down. “I’m happy to see you too,” he admits.

Taeyong grins. They make their way towards the training grounds.

“I’m actually so sore,” Ten complains. “Training is kicking my ass.”

“Sore? Where?” Taeyong says.

“My thighs.” He touches his quads.

“Let me carry you then,” Taeyong says and stops.

“What? Taeyong!”

He easily grabs Ten and puts him over the shoulder. Taeyong keeps walking like it’s nothing as
Ten laughs. He’s not surprised by Taeyong’s strength, though. He did see him holding Sejin
against the wall once.

When they reach the training grounds, Taeyong sets him down on the bleachers. Ten rests back
and Taeyong stays standing, hands propped on Ten’s sides. Taeyong is smiling so beautifully, his
blond bangs falling over his eyes, the sun as a backdrop. Ten’s eyes roam his face, landing on his
plush pink lips, the tiny mole Taeyong has under them. Taeyong realizes this and leans in for a
kiss.

Instantly, Ten’s core alights. The touch is meek but not less enticing. They move slowly against
the other. Taeyong sucks Ten’s lips and licks them. Ten parts his mouth to welcome it inside. His
hands go to Taeyong’s waist, sliding until to his back. They kiss until Ten forgets his surroundings,
forgets everything besides Taeyong’s touch.

He has no frame of reference, but he deduces Taeyong is an excellent kisser. They just fit together
without even trying.

Taeyong drags his lips to Ten’s cheek, then nibbles his earlobe. He kisses down his neck. Ten
tightens his hands on Taeyong’s shirt and loses his breath, throwing his head back. Taeyong does it
all in the softest way imaginable, and still it makes Ten’s belly churn.

“You smell really nice,” Taeyong whispers suddenly.

Ten giggles. “I don’t really use perfume,” he confesses.

Taeyong kisses his skin some more. “I know. You have your own particular scent that I can’t
pinpoint. Besides the Academy’s toiletries.”

“You smell nice too,” Ten offers, noting on his blackberry and bay scent.

Taeyong comes back to kiss him on the mouth, his eyes half-lidded. They look at each other up
close like that, their noses touching. Taeyong cups Ten’s cheek, thumbing stroking it gently. When
they are like this, Ten wishes they had more time to spend together without all their obligations.

“Here,” Taeyong says, taking something out of his pocket.

Ten laughs. Of course it’s choco pie. He takes it and Taeyong sits beside him. They each get one.
Ten enjoys the sunlight on his face and Taeyong’s presence beside him.
They spend the afternoon talking about nothing in particular and trading sweet kisses, then head
back to the cafeteria for dinner.

“You know I have a gel for muscle soreness in my room,” Taeyong says as they are going towards
the dorms.

“Okay.” Ten nods.

He takes a shower and puts on a fresh set of his uniform before heading to Taeyong’s room.
Jaehyun is nowhere to be found, probably enjoying his time with Doyoung.

Ten knocks on Taeyong’s door, which opens shortly after. Taeyong is barefooted, with a white t-
shirt and gray sweatpants on, his blond hair damp. Ten steps in and sits on the bed, removing his
boots and socks and leaving them aside. Taeyong comes to him with a tube of cream. Ten
undresses from his uniform shirt and pants, down to his white undershirt and briefs.

“Can I?” Taeyong asks, kneeling in front of him.

Ten looks into his gray eyes and nods. Taeyong coats his right fingers with the gel and places his
hand on top of Ten’s thigh. He starts massaging it up and down, in broad circles. It gives some
relief to Ten’s soreness already. Taeyong continues kneading the muscle gently, passing to the
other leg, eventually. Ten watches and enjoys the warmth of Taeyong hands, the care he applies.
It’s a simple thing, but feels so intimate. No touch ever felt this way.

“There you go,” Taeyong says, looks up at him, corners of his lips tugging up softly.

Ten leans in and puts his lips on Taeyong’s. They move slowly.

“Thank you,” Ten says.

Taeyong leaves to wash his hands in the bathroom while Ten gets in bed, feeling tired. Taeyong
soon joins him and pulls him closer. Ten gladly settles in the embrace, Taeyong resting his chin on
the top of Ten’s head, arms around each other. They fall asleep like that.

The next day, Ten and Taeyong spend the day studying in the library with Jaehyun and Doyoung,
eventually going to dinner together.

The couples say their goodnights, and each go to their respective dorms.

“How was your Saturday?” Jaehyun asks, filled with glee.

Ten sighs content. “It was pretty amazing. By your face I can tell yours was too.”

They chuckle. Jaehyun puts an arm around Ten’s back, and they walk like that. The gesture makes
Ten think back to Taeyong and how being in his arms is different. Ten feels the affection Jaehyun
has for him and feels comfortable being touched by him. But with Taeyong, it has something else
attached to it. Another layer. Like a teeming surface being broken through, delving deeper into the
unknown.

Ten is glad to discover what lies under those waters.

 As Taeyong rests alone in his bed waiting for sleep to overtake him, he thinks back to the winter
break when he didn’t even know Ten Lee existed.

He smiles to himself now that this changed completely.

Chapter End Notes

taeyong's first pov! what do you think?

the line "what, like it's hard?" comes from legally blonde lmao

this chapter was all about cuteness. like i said in a reply, this is the calm before the
storm, so enjoy it
 where’s that man who’d throw blankets over my barbed wire?
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

In the weeks that pass, Ten and Taeyong continue to hang out. They are both diligent with their
studies, so the time is limited, but whatever moment they have together is filled with laughter,
affection, choco pies, and endless conversations about any possible thing they can come up with.

“What is your favorite childhood memory?” Ten asks Taeyong as they lounge on his bed one
night.

“My dog Ruby,” Taeyong says. “I loved her very much. She passed of old age. What about
yours?”

Ten immediately recalls being on beaches with his family back in Daw, how the scorching sun
made him tan, drinking fresh coconut water, playing in the ocean.

“Going to the beach with my family.” Ten spares the details, after all, Corinth has a coastline.

Ten and Taeyong are walking to Basement A for a small get together, hand in hand. The students
there are sitting on the floor, no music playing, just a handful of people. They approach their group
of friends and take a seat in front of Jaehyun and Doyoung.

“How’s it going?” Jaehyun smiles.

“Tired,” Ten sighs. “Is there something to drink?”

“I’ll grab you something,” Taeyong offers. “What do you want?”

“Some vodka will be good, thanks.”

Taeyong kisses him before he gets up. Jaehyun and Doyoung trade a look and smile at Ten.

“What?” he asks.

“I’ve never seen Taeyong holding hands with anyone,” Doyoung says, pointing his plastic cup at
Ten.

Ten flusters while Jaehyun grins.

“So cute!” his friend squeals.

“Shut up.” Ten just wants to hide his red face and his smile behind his hand.

When Taeyong doesn’t return, Ten looks for him. He’s beside the drinks table having what can
only be a heated argument with Seulgi.

“What’s her deal?” Ten asks Doyoung.

“Well,” he says. “They know each other from before the Academy. They went to the same middle
and high school. And they were each other’s firsts.”
“Firsts?” Ten mutters.

“First kiss. First sexual experience,” Doyoung explains, keeping his voice emotionless.

Jaehyun is gaping, his eyes moving from Doyoung to Ten to Taeyong and Seulgi. Ten just gulps,
ignoring the discomfort he feels.

“Maybe that’s why she hates me,” he says, trying to be light about it.

“She doesn’t hate you,” Doyoung comforts him.

“She does. To her I’m nothing but a gold digger.” Ten sighs. “I’m gonna use the restroom.”

He stands and walks towards the bathroom. Ten washes his face in a vain attempt to bottle down
his feelings. He leans over the sink counter, with his eyes closed, breathing in and out. He stays
there for who knows how long until the door creaks. Ten lifts his eyes to see who came in.

It’s Sejin and her four usual friends.

Well, this can’t be good.

Ten straightens. He is just going to remove himself from this situation. But as he makes his way to
the door, the five of them stand in front of him.

“Can I just—” he tries.

Ten is interrupted by a kick in between his legs. The pain is blinding. Someone pushes him to the
ground, where he curls up, holding his aching balls, a silent groan stuck in his throat. His eyes
water as he evens out his breathing.

“What a little bitch,” one of them says. They laugh.

Another kick, this time in the ribs. Ten flinches under the strike.

“This is what you get for reaching out of your league, Lee.”

More kicks come, all over his body. His instinct is to protect his face and head. These girls aren’t
weak, they’ve been under military physical conditioning for months. But how the hell is Ten
supposed to fight back when they are women, or escape when they outnumber him? Ten feels
himself dissociating from everything around him, the pain, the blows, the laughter.

“HEY!” A shout. They stop hitting Ten. “Get the fuck away from him.”

Ten keeps his eyes squeezed shut, afraid to look. There are sounds of a commotion.

“Or else I will hit you in the fucking face.” Taeyong’s voice is the most dangerous thing Ten’s
ever heard.

“Tennie?” Jaehyun kneels beside him and puts a hand on his shoulder gently.

“Get out of here before I call someone.” It’s Johnny who says this.

Ten finally opens his eyes. Jaehyun is over him, a worried look on his face. Taeyong, Doyoung,
Johnny, Jungwoo and Yuta are all here too, glaring as the girls leave. Ten can’t stop shaking and
realizes his cheeks are tear streaked. He wipes them self-consciously. Taeyong kneels beside him
and immediately cups his head, examining him. His eyes are terribly tormented, but his expression
is caring.

“I’m okay,” Ten groans, trying to sit up. Jaehyun and Taeyong assist.

Taeyong begins a quick exam of Ten’s body, checking for broken bones.

“We should take him to the infirmary,” Doyoung says.

“No, please,” Ten protests. “It’s nothing. They didn’t hit me for that long.”

Taeyong closes his fists until his knuckles are white. Ten grabs it.

“Help me up,” he asks.

Ten stands with Taeyong and Jaehyun’s help. Although his body is sore, there is no acute pain.

“I just wanna lie down,” Ten begs. “Let’s forget this.”

“They can’t get away with this,” Taeyong says, voice strained.

“What’s the alternative? How can we explain what we were doing here at this time of the night?”
Ten says. “Not without exposing all of us to disciplinary action or worse.”

Taeyong exhales harshly. “Okay.”

“Thank you for standing up for me,” Ten tells all of them.

Ten and Taeyong walk slowly back to the dorms.

“Please, stay with me tonight,” Taeyong pleads.

Much better than to go back to the dorm he shares with Sejin and her friends. So they head to
Taeyong’s room. Ten undresses down to his underwear. His skin is marked red in various spots.
Taeyong is bringing him a t-shirt when he stops and sees this. Taeyong’s face becomes scarlet,
fuming with anger.

“I’m fine,” Ten insists weakly.

Taeyong comes in front of him and his fingers touch Ten’s ribs, where a hematoma is forming.

“This is all my fault,” Taeyong mutters.

“It’s not.”

Taeyong shakes his head. “I’ll do something about this.”

“Taeyong…” Ten pulls him close by the waist.

Taeyong carefully and slowly puts his arms around Ten, not holding tight.

“Promise me you won’t hurt them,” Ten whispers.

“I won’t. Not physically.” Taeyong looks at him, running his knuckles on Ten’s cheek. “Let’s get
you in bed.”

He helps Ten with the t-shirt and they lay down, side by side. Ten huddles close, searching his
warmth, his touch, his affection. And Taeyong gives it all to Ten.
What happens in the next days is the slow social ostracism that Sejin and her friends suffer. In the
cantina, people will literally get up if they sit next to them, without saying a word, and leave to sit
somewhere else. If they approach a group of students to talk, they pointedly ignore them like they
are invisible. Ten is surprised at how deep Taeyong’s influence in the Academy runs. Maybe his
family really is a big deal.

Ten has bruises for days and is generally sore, but he manages. He is being built to be a soldier
after all; he isn’t weak. Over the course of the months, he learned how to curb the pain that came
from the physically demanding training of the Academy. Now it works for this situation.

Taeyong insists Ten spends the nights over in his bedroom, and Ten agrees, because he is still
afraid to meet Sejin and her friends in his dorm. He gets used to the comfort of Taeyong’s arms
very easily. According to the rules, Taeyong isn’t supposed to have guests over, but they still do it.

Seulgi is still being a bitch about Ten and Taeyong’s relationship. When they are in the same
space, she often glares, or calls Taeyong to argue with him. Ten doesn’t understand her. Is she in
love with him or something? And if she is, why didn’t she just do something before Taeyong met
Ten? This frustrates Ten more than he’d like.

The end of the semester approaches, and finals with it. This means extra time studying and
reviewing their subjects, as well as time spent practicing their physical and weapon skills. Ten and
Taeyong are often at the library with tall cups of coffee, cramming, or at the shooting range. They
also started to spar. Taeyong is very good at it. They are taught a mix of martial arts that was
developed especially for the army.

On the training grounds, Ten and Taeyong raise their hands. They are both panting, sweating,
flushed after hours of practice.

“Come at me,” Taeyong says.

Ten advances. The objective is to immobilize Taeyong. Ten launches at his legs, trying to topple
him over so he can dominate him on the ground. They struggle and end up on the floor, all over
each other. Ten exhales, having a hard time against Taeyong’s strength and skill. Taeyong is not
only one year ahead of him at school, but he’s been taught martial arts since he was a kid.

Ten ends up in a chokehold and taps Taeyong’s arm, who lets him go. They stand.

“You’re too good for me,” Ten says, wiping his brow on his sleeve.

Taeyong strips off his shirt, throwing it aside. This reveals his chiseled and strong physique. Ten
watches the muscles on his back, the width of his shoulders, his fair skin. Taeyong is so attractive,
it’s insane. Ten is biting his bottom lip unconsciously when Taeyong turns around.

“That’s the ideal for you to get better,” Taeyong says with a smile.

“You have a point,” Ten says, focusing on the subject and not on Taeyong’s naked chest and abs.

“You improved, by the way. You’ll totally pass your evaluation,” Taeyong says kindly. “I’d
probably demolish most first-year students in a second while you manage to put up a struggle.”

Ten blushes. “Aren’t you going too easy on me?”

“Of course not. I want to help you.”

They can’t kiss right now, although Ten really wants to.
 “I’m done for the night. Why don’t we take a shower and get into bed?” Ten suggests.

They do just that, and in the privacy of Taeyong’s sheets they make out before falling asleep in
each other’s arms.

Chapter End Notes

i tagged hurt/comfort because of this chapter lmao. cuz literally ten gets hurt and
taeyong comforts him

they are so sexy sparring together though lmao i love that for them
 if it’s all in my head, tell me now, tell me i’ve got it wrong somehow
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

The final exams come and last for two weeks. Ten does well in all of them, including the practical
ones. And he has Taeyong to thank for the latter, who taught him to shoot better and took the time
to spar with him.

To celebrate the end of the semester, they obviously throw a party. Sejin and her friends are
nowhere to be seen, and this makes Ten relax much better. He’s sipping his drink, laughing with
Jaehyun, when he sees Seulgi sit on Irene’s lap not far from them. The girls trade caresses and
kisses. Ten watches, confused. If Seulgi is all over Irene, why does she care about Ten and
Taeyong? It doesn’t make sense.

“She loves her,” Taeyong says suddenly in Ten’s ear.

He startles. “What?”

“I know what you are thinking,” he continues. “You think Seulgi is in love with me. But no, she
loves Irene.”

Ten studies him. “Then why is she so vocally opposed to us?”

“She thinks we are together for the wrong reasons,” Taeyong explains. “In the world she and I
were brought up, we don’t entertain a relationship with someone outside of our class. Unless it’s
just sex.”

Which is the farthest thing from their relationship. They have been going out for months and never
done anything more than kiss.

Taeyong passes an arm around Ten’s back and pulls him close, kissing his temple for a long time.

When they are back in Taeyong’s room, Ten thinks they are just gonna fall into bed and enjoy
sleeping together one last time before they have to part for the summer. They aren’t allowed to
have their personal phones or other devices in the Academy, but they will trade numbers so they
can chat during the break, maybe even meet up. Both live in the Capital, although Ten obviously
lives in a highly populated and poor area, and Taeyong lives in the outskirts of town on an estate.

“I wanna talk to you about something,” Taeyong says, sitting in bed.

“Okay,” Ten sits in front of him.

“We’ve been seeing each other for a while.” His expression is relaxed, gleeful.

“We have.” Ten smiles.

“And I want to make this official. I want you to be my boyfriend, Ten.”

Ten opens his mouth to say yes. But something stops him. His smile falters.

He wanted to hear these words so much.

Except, there is a problem.

Taeyong doesn’t really know Ten.

He does but doesn’t. He doesn’t know Ten’s true status as a refugee, doesn’t know he’s Dawi. And
Taeyong is a born and raised, pure-blooded Corinthian with a wealthy, influential family. What if
Ten reveals the truth and Taeyong shows his hatred for Ten’s kind just like most of their classmates
do? What if he outs him to the entire school?

Ten has been lying by omission. Because he’s afraid. He feels he can’t disclose his nationality and
the reasons he lives in Corinth. But he also can’t be in a committed relationship with someone who
doesn’t accept him for who he is. So he’s caught between two impossibilities. Can’t admit, can’t
commit.

At this point, Taeyong looks worried, because Ten has been silent for a while.

“Can I think about it?” Ten manages to say.

“Sure.”

Ten’s stomach is churning. He didn’t have much to drink, but he thinks he’s gonna hurl.

“Actually, I should go pack my bag,” Ten says, forcing a smile on his face and getting up. “Talk to
you tomorrow?”

Taeyong stands too. “Okay.” He kisses Ten softly.

Ten leaves. In a second, he’s running. His eyes are watering. When he arrives at the bathroom, he’s
already sobbing. And then he’s vomiting and crying at the same time.

He knows that soft, sweet kiss was the last Taeyong will ever give him. And this crushes him
whole, crushes his soul, his heart. He wants to run back into Taeyong’s arms and fall asleep in that
known comfort, the security of his embrace. He wants to kiss him harder than he ever did before,
wants to strip and give himself to Taeyong in any way possible. But he can’t. He can’t risk saying
the truth.

He’s up early in the morning to catch the 7 am bus back to the Capital. His things all fit in his
trekking backpack. He boards and sits by the window. He fiddles with his thumbs while he waits
for the departure.

The bus starts.

Ten lifts his head and looks out the window.

He freezes.

Taeyong is on the nearby grounds, his eyes searching for something. They land on Ten. Taeyong
starts walking towards him. Ten just watches as Taeyong picks up speed until he’s running. But the
bus accelerates. Ten’s eyes water, his entire face twisting with the pain that is cutting in his chest.
He touches the glass.

He’s bawling his eyes out, hiccupping, as the bus leaves, Taeyong left behind until he disappears
from sight.

Ten curls up towards his lap, hiding his face into his hands, sobs rippling across his entire body
violently.
Chapter End Notes

ngl i cried writing the part where the bus left

 should’ve kept every grocery store receipt cause every scrap of you would be
taken from me
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten is happy to see his parents again. Happy to be home. Happy to have his phone back, even if
it’s just to watch stupid dramas and listen to music, but not much else. The network access in
Corinth is provided by the government, and you can only use public wi-fi, which tracks any
activity you do, all your private messages and searches and content consumed. There is a firewall
that prevents you from accessing most international websites. The only ones that can have full
access to foreign content are the ones with a permit for it, like scientists, diplomats, government
officials and military personal, and they use a separate network for that.

Ten thinks about Taeyong. Ten aches for him. He has sleepless nights when he can recall how
perfectly they fit into one another, their sweet kisses, their afternoons at the library studying, their
nights at the shooting range. He misses him so fucking much. But he needs to forget him.

Ten texts Jaehyun throughout the weeks. They decide to meet up to talk in person, because it’s
creepy that people read their messages and Ten doesn’t want to pour his broken heart to a third
party. Since Ten’s neighborhood is sketchy, he goes over to Jaehyun’s, a nicer part of the Capital.
He’s dressed in his only battered black jeans that have a torn over the knee, his academy boots, and
his white t-shirt which has some holes in it. When Ten arrives at the café, Jaehyun is there smiling
at his phone.

Ten sits. “Hey.”

“Tennie!” Jaehyun looks at him. “Wait, you look like shit.”

“Thanks.”

“What happened?” Jaehyun puts a hand on Ten’s forearm, which is over the table.

Ten breathes in and out deeply. “Taeyong asked me to be his boyfriend. I said I’d think about it.
But I just… left. I left him behind.”

Ten gets choked from the words. He can’t even meet Jaehyun’s eyes.

“Ten… Why?”

“Because I can’t tell him the truth about my status,” he whimpers, trying to keep himself together.
“I can’t risk it. And it’s not fair to any of us to be in a relationship when I’m lying to him.”

Jaehyun moves spots and sits next to Ten, pulling him into his arms. His best friend’s embrace is
comforting and a relief to Ten’s pain.

“It’s okay,” Jaehyun whispers, his chin leaning against the top of Ten’s head. “I get it. You don’t
have to expose yourself to anyone you don’t want to.”

Ten is so relieved to hear those words. He’s been driving himself insane all this time, wondering if
he was exaggerating or not. They stay like that for a while until Ten calms down completely. He
moves to look at Jaehyun.
“Thank you, Jaehyunnie,” he says. “I love you.”

He kisses Ten’s forehead. “I love you too, Tennie.”

Jaehyun insists on buying Ten a cup of iced americano. They sip their drinks.

“Tell me something good,” Ten says. “How is Doyoung?”

Jaehyun smiles. “He’s fine. We’re really good. He came over to my house.”

Ten gapes. “He did? He met your parents?”

Jaehyun nods.

“So are you officially together?”

His smile turns into a grimace. “Yeah. We don’t need to talk about it—”

“Don’t let my problems taint your happiness,” Ten insists, taking his hand. “Tell me all about it.”

“Okay,” Jaehyun nods. “We… did… things.”

“What?!” Ten widens his eyes.

Jaehyun giggles. “Not all the way. Just hand stuff, you know.”

“How was it?” Ten whispers.

“It was amazing.” Jaehyun sighs, dreamy. “I’m head-over-heels. It’s ridiculous. I eat on the palm
of his hand.”

Ten laughs.

“Which means he can crush me in a second,” Jaehyun concludes.

“He won’t,” Ten protests. “He really likes you. Plus, one of us deserves to be happy.”

“You’ll be happy, Tennie. I promise,” Jaehyun says kindly. “You’ll get that grant and you’ll ace
Peitharchía. You’ll get a great job and buy a nice house for your parents.”

Ten smiles earnestly. Feels good to have someone cheering you on. Ten lands his head on
Jaehyun’s shoulder.

As summer progresses, Ten’s heartbreak lessens. He still thinks about Taeyong every day, but he
manages to sleep at night. It’s not an excruciating torment. Ten convinces himself he can survive
this. He survived worse. He survived war, the death of his sister, losing his homeland. This is just
plain heartbreak, he tells himself.

Ten keeps up the conditioning exercises to maintain his shape. But he has no one to spar, he can’t
really afford a gym, and most of all he misses having a gun in his hands and unloading a whole clip
on a target. Maybe that would help him sort through his feelings.

The days until his second year at the academy gets closer and closer. With that, the nervousness of
knowing he’ll see Taeyong again settles in his core. The closer to the date of departure, the more
anxious Ten gets.
There is nothing he can do about it except pack his bag and get on the bus back to the Academy at
the start of the fall semester.

By a stroke of luck, Ten doesn’t see Taeyong the first day back. He sits in the cantina with
Jaehyun, Doyoung, Johnny, Jungwoo, Yuta and Taeil, but Taeyong is nowhere to be seen.

He sees Sejin though, sitting alone with none of her old friends. She looks awful. Ten tries not to
pity her, remembering what she did to him.

A week goes by with no sight of Taeyong. Ten refuses to ask Doyoung about it, and Jaehyun won’t
do it either. Classes are harder than before, with heavy workloads. But Ten appreciates the
distraction. This is what he’s here for, not to pine over some guy.

Until some guy appears in the corridor as Ten is heading to dinner. Jaehyun met up with Doyoung
earlier, so Ten is alone. Ten freezes as they look at each other from across the space, other people
walking, oblivious to what is happening between them. Taeyong marches in his direction, his face
a mask of impassiveness. Ten widens his eyes, takes a step back, thinking he’ll make a run to
escape. But Taeyong is there in an instant, his big hand grasping Ten’s upper arm and pulling him
along.

Taeyong takes them into an empty classroom, turning on the lights and shutting the door behind
them. He drags Ten inside, putting him against a desk. His gray eyes are piercing into Ten, like two
thundering clouds. Ten just stares back in silence. Taeyong doesn’t let go of his arm.

“Why did you shut me out?” Taeyong asks in a low tone. “Why did you disappear?” Taeyong
waits for an answer, but it doesn’t come. “You could have just said no, and I would have accepted
that. I’d be heartbroken, yes, but at least I would have moved on.” His voice gradually raises in
volume. “These last three months were torture.”

Ten is just gaping, trying to get his voice to work. Taeyong is so close to him, too close, and it’s
distracting to have his body next to his again.

“I can’t stop thinking about you,” Taeyong mutters.

Ten loses his breath and sees it clear as day. Taeyong’s eyes carry everything in them. All the
affection he feels for Ten, all the longing is there, so plain to bear witness. Taeyong must see
something in Ten too, because the next thing that happens is they are closing the distance in a
second, mouths clashing together. Ten immediately parts his lips to welcome Taeyong’s tongue
inside. Taeyong clutches him by the waist, their bodies coming flush. Ten holds him by the
shoulders, fingertips digging into the flesh. They kiss faster and harder than they ever did before.
It’s almost brutal, the force in which they do it, in an attempt to make up for all the time lost, all
the hurt of being apart. Taeyong’s palms explore Ten’s body, kneading, daring to cross into places
it never had, his ass, his chest under his uniform shirt.

Ten sits on the desk and Taeyong leans against him. Ten wraps his legs around his waist.
Taeyong’s hand climbs up Ten’s spine until the roots of his hair, and he clutches it strongly, pulling
Ten’s head back.

“Ahh—” Ten whines.

Taeyong kisses down his neck, dragging his lips, his tongue, his teeth all over the skin, unafraid to
brand Ten as his. Ten is panting, his cock hard in his pants, he doesn’t want to ever let go.
 “Taeyong.”

He calls his name in a plea, a plea for forgiveness, for the world to fade away, for endless nights
under starlight together.

“I missed you,” Taeyong whispers against his wet neck, his voice heavy with lust.

Ten sobs beside himself. Taeyong stops the kisses to look at him.

“Ten? Tell me what’s wrong.”

He just hides his face on Taeyong’s chest, his watering eyes, his pained expression. Taeyong holds
him close in those perfect powerful arms. Ten eventually calms down. Taeyong moves to cup
Ten’s face in between his hands.

“Look at me,” Taeyong asks.

Ten opens his tearful eyes and sees Taeyong’s beautiful gray irises, his pupils dark and blown.

“Talk to me,” Taeyong is begging.

“I missed you too,” Ten finally speaks. “I’m sorry for what I did.”

“Did I scare you away? What did I do wrong?” Taeyong asks.

“You were perfect. I’m the problem.” Ten sniffles.

Taeyong kisses his forehead, lingers there. “You aren’t. You’re the one who’s perfect,” he
mumbles against the skin.

It pains Ten to hear that because he’s not. He made this mess in the first place and he’s here
making a mess again. But he can’t tear himself away from Taeyong, can’t run, can’t hide. He
wants him so badly it hurts.

“Come to my room,” Taeyong says.

Ten nods. They disentangle themselves and Ten wipes his face on his sleeve. He puts the hem of
his shirt inside his pants again before they leave. They walk in silence back to Taeyong’s bedroom.
It’s a new place, basically the same layout as the old one, but there is a door that leads to a
bathroom. They get out of their boots and strip down to their white undershirts and underwear.
Taeyong pulls Ten towards the bed and they lie down together.

They regard each other in silence.

This is it.

Either Ten chooses to trust Taeyong or lie to him for the rest of their lives.

Chapter End Notes

 were you waiting at our old spot in the tree line by the gold clock? did i leave
you hanging every single day?
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Either Ten chooses to trust Taeyong or lie to him for the rest of their lives.

Ten takes a deep breath, allows his fingers to explore the softness of Taeyong’s cheek. He’s so
handsome, his gray eyes so attentive and kind. Taeyong takes his hand and kisses Ten’s knuckles.

Ten needs to follow his gut.

“If I tell you something in confidence, do you promise to keep it a secret from everyone? Even
Doyoung? Even your family?”

“Of course. Any of your secrets will die with me,” Taeyong assures him.

It’s a gamble. He’s all in. Ten either wins or loses it all.

“I wasn’t born in Corinth. I’m a Dawi refugee. I came here when I was thirteen because of the war.
That’s how I lost my sister.”

Ten can see the understanding dawn on Taeyong’s face. Ten gives him a moment to process
everything.

“This is why you ran away from me?”

“Yes. I wasn’t ready to say it, and I didn’t think it was fair to start a relationship omitting
something like that,” Ten explains. “And I was afraid that maybe you’d… reject me.” Ten gulps.

“I would never reject you for that,” Taeyong says. A weight lifts off Ten. “But your fear is
founded. I’m aware of how refugees are treated here.”

Ten exhales. He can’t believe that out of everyone, Taeyong is the one that doesn’t discriminate
against him.

“I don’t care where you were born,” Taeyong continues. “I only care that I got the chance to meet
you. And be with you.”

Ten smiles. He feels so seen, so accepted, so embraced. It’s like standing under the sun. He can
breathe much easier now. They share a kiss.

Taeyong moves to grab something from his bedside drawer. He brings a choco pie. Ten laughs.
Taeyong opens the package and gives them one each. Somehow they taste much better than last
semester’s.

“So, can I call you my boyfriend now?” Taeyong asks, with a teasing smile.

“Yes. Boyfriend.”

They kiss and their lips taste like chocolate.

Ten spends the night in Taeyong’s arms.

Next day, Ten pulls Jaehyun aside between classes and explains everything that happened in a
hushed voice. Jaehyun hugs him tight.

“I’m so proud of you, Tennie. And I’m so happy Taeyong is a decent man.”

Ten nods cheerfully.

“Who would have thought? Remember when you hated him?” Jaehyun jokes.

Ten laughs nervously. “I didn’t hate him. Just disliked him at first glance.”

“Well, now look at you. Infatuated.”

Ten playfully slaps Jaehyun’s arm. “Let’s go to class.”

During the first months of the semester, everything is great. Classes are engaging, training is going
well for Ten, he sees Taeyong during mealtimes and usually spends Friday and Saturday nights in
his room. They are too busy during most days to hang out, but often they study in the library,
practice combat and firearms together. Taeyong’s third year in the Academy is the hardest of all,
and Ten doesn’t want to risk getting in the way of that. Even if Taeyong’s family can afford the
Peitharchía, he needs top marks to be considered.

It happens sometimes for Taeyong to be a good friend to Doyoung and lend him his room so he can
have privacy and comfort with Jaehyun to do… whatever they are doing.

Ten quickly hears about it.

“And then he just kept swallowing and swallowing,” Jaehyun continues in a whisper.

They are in the common room and Ten is trying to stifle his chuckles with his hand but failing.

“And then, boom! He drank all of it.”

At this point, Ten is bending in half, while they laugh. He gets himself together.

“Was is good?” he inquires curiously.

“The best thing I’ve ever received,” Jaehyun says with assurance. “I wonder what the next part
feels like.”

“I think it hurts,” Ten wagers. He lowers his voice. “I mean… it’s your ass. Will it even fit there?”

“Of course it will!” Jaehyun mutters. “You just need to prepare.”

“But do you think it will feel good?”

“Yeah.” He makes a gesture with his index and middle fingers, pushing them up in the air.
“Prostate.”

“Still. When I imagine it, I find it weird.”

“Wait until Taeyong puts a finger up in there.”

Ten pushes Jaehyun, who bursts into giggles.

“When are you going to do anything besides kiss the man?” his friend asks.

“I don’t know.” Ten has a shy smile on his face. “I’m a bit scared.”

“Why? It’s good, I promise,” Jaehyun argues. “And based on Taeyong’s track record, he knows his
way around a body.”

“Are you sure? I only know about women he fucked.”

“He fucked Johnny,” Jaehyun reveals.

“What?” Ten’s jaw dropped.

“Doyoung told me,” he explains. “He also fucked Yuta and other guys from his year when they
were all freshmen.”

“When you say he fucked them, you mean he was the one putting the thing in them?”

“Yep.” Jaehyun snaps his lips.

Ten ponders. “Okay, maybe you’re right. Maybe Taeyong knows what he’s doing.”

“Maybe you should ask Johnny for a rating. One to five stars.”

“Shut up!” Ten whines, pinching Jaehyun’s arm lightly.

Jaehyun cackles. “You love me.”

“I do. That’s why I hear your endless babble about cock sucking.”

“You love me babbling about cock sucking.” Jaehyun elbows him gently.

“Yeah. You caught me.” It is actually fun listening to it. Ten can learn by proxy, maybe prepare
himself for whenever he and Taeyong take that step.

As if on cue, next Friday night things get heated with Taeyong. They are in bed making out,
Taeyong on top of Ten. The kiss is propelling Ten up to the skies on a cloud. His lips are puffy
from all the kissing, his cock is hard in his underwear, and he can feel Taeyong’s erection pressing
against his groin. He likes knowing that he has this effect on Taeyong, even if they don’t take
things further.

Taeyong’s palm is kneading the back of Ten’s thigh, sending a pleasant and heady sensation
throughout his entire body. Then Taeyong drags his hand to Ten’s hipbone. Slowly, he moves it
towards Ten’s crotch. When he realizes where it’s going, Ten snatches the wrist to stop it. Taeyong
halts the kissing to look at Ten.

“Sorry,” he says, intertwining their hands and landing them on the mattress.

“It’s fine, I’m just…” Ten says. “Not ready yet. Is that okay?”

“Of course it’s okay. Your body, your rules, your pace. I don’t wanna rush you,” Taeyong says. “I
just figured you might want me to make the first move.”

“That makes sense. I wouldn’t know where to begin.”

Taeyong smiles and kisses Ten’s chin, then lips.

“You can touch me anywhere you want,” says Taeyong. “I just don’t get that much pleasure when
I bottom.”

“Oh. Why is that?”

“I don’t know. I’ve tried it a couple of times, but it doesn’t work that well for me,” he explains.
“So I focused on becoming a decent top.”

Ten thinks back to what Jaehyun said.

“Do you think you please them well?” he asks, curious.

“I have gotten praises,” Taeyong says. “No complaints.”

“Okay. I’ll accept your word for it.” Ten smiles.

“You can ask around. Any guy from my year.”

Ten blushes. “I won’t do that.”

Taeyong laughs. “By the way. I wanted to mention something I think is important.”

“Tell me.”

“I got tested during the summer and I am clean,” Taeyong says. “And I haven’t been with anyone
else ever since. I thought it was worth doing it even if we wear condoms. Better to err on the safe
side.”

“Well, I was clean when I tested to get into the Academy,” Ten says. They screen for many things,
including STDs. “And I am still a dumb virgin so…”

“You aren’t dumb for being a virgin.” Taeyong looks at him softly with his gray eyes. “It’s just not
the reality for most of us. We usually become sexually active during high school here, especially in
the Capital.”

Although part of the population of Corinth has a prejudiced outlook on foreigners, they have open
views on sexuality, including queerness. Same-sex marriage is legal, and those who want and
qualify can apply for surrogates or adopt. Sex and gender education is mandatory at school at an
early age, birth control is funded and distributed by the state—mandatory until people reach their
thirties when they are allowed to try for kids, maximum of two per household, and some groups of
people can’t ever have the chips removed if they are deemed inadequate by the government. Single
people aren’t allowed to try for kids in Corinth.

“I wasn’t really popular in high school,” Ten says. “And I’m Dawi, so maybe I’m don’t fit the
norm.”

“And that’s perfectly fine.” Taeyong gives him a peck.

Ten wraps his arms around Taeyong’s neck. “Thank you for respecting my timing.”

“It’s the bare minimum, Ten. Don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise.”

Ten smiles. He’s so happy with Taeyong.

 But things take a turn for the worse, and it’s out of his control. He’s eating in the cantina when
someone close to him brings up another alleged Red Stain attack. This time, it was mass shooting
at a center where refugees stay before they get permanent housing.

“The problem is they keep harboring these potential criminals,” someone is saying. “While also
keeping our reproductive rights hostage.”

“If they want to control the population, maybe they should stop allowing these people into our
borders,” another agrees.

Ten just drops his fork, stunned. Can’t these people hear themselves? They are justifying a
terrorist attack. Ten grabs his tray and stands, returning it. He lost his appetite completely. He
feels ill.

He rushes to the nearest restroom and hides in a stall. He’s shaking. Ten hides his face in his
hands, trying to recompose himself, but hearing something that disturbing just makes him want to
wail.

“Ten?”

He hears Taeyong call faintly. Ten opens a slit of the door. Taeyong approaches and slips inside.

“Come here.” Taeyong brings him into his arms. “They are racist jerks.”

Now that Taeyong is here, Ten can’t hold himself back anymore. He sobs as quietly as he can, and
his boyfriend holds him through it.

When his cries subside, Ten speaks up.

“The worst part is being helpless. There is nothing I can do about this. I can’t leave. This is my
home now. There is nowhere to go back to.” He keeps his eyes shut, face resting on Taeyong’s
chest. “I can’t speak up against my peers. I can’t stop the Red Stain. I’m fucking useless.”

“You aren’t. You’re surviving the best you can in a hostile environment.”

“Why doesn’t it feel like enough?”

“It is. I promise,” Taeyong whispers, cupping the back of Ten’s head gently.

The only thing can do, realistically, is get into the Peitharchía and earn a position of power in the
government after. Maybe that way he can fight harder to implement laws that will educate people
and dismantle all the ingrained xenophobia in this country. Laws to protect foreigners. Or maybe
he can pledge National Defense and help hunt down the Red Stain.

That night, Ten chooses to spend the night in Taeyong’s room, seeking the comfort of his arms. He
just wants to forget what he heard.

Chapter End Notes

 all your closets of backlogged dreams and how you left them all to me
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Winter break arrives, with it heaps of snowfall, and a much-needed break after a demanding
semester. Ten and Taeyong still have homework but spend as much time together as they can. One
night, they wrap themselves in their warmest clothes and leave for the gardens, because Taeyong
wants to show him something. When they are sufficiently far from the main building, Taeyong
intertwines their gloved hands together and pulls him along, across the training grounds and even
further away.

They are almost near one of the vast walls that enclose the Academy property and it’s getting
pitch-black dark.

“Where are we going?” Ten wonders.

“Here.” Taeyong stops. “Lie down with me.”

They do that, over the fluffy snow.

“What are we doing here?” Ten asks him, trying to make out Taeyong face.

“Look up.”

Ten complies. That’s when he sees.

The sky.

A vast darkness littered with stars. They shine as bright as Ten has ever seen. Used to city lights, he
never noticed how the Gála Galaxy cuts across the sky like a magnificent, gleaming wound.

“How did you find this spot?” Ten asks.

“I find comfort in the peace nature provides,” Taeyong explains. “I grew up in a large estate where
most of it is fields of green. I’d spend hours as a kid lying on the grass and stargazing. When I
came to the Academy, there were too many lights. So I explored the grounds until I found the
perfect spot.”

Ten takes Taeyong’s hand in his. “Thank you for showing me this.”

“There is something else I want you to see.”

“What?”

Taeyong lifts their hands together, stretching his index finger. He traces a triangle on the sky, and
Ten tries to follow with his eyes attentively.

“Those three bright stars. Can you spot them?”

Ten squints, slowly making it out, connecting the dots.

“I do.”
“They are called Altair, Vega, and Deneb. There is a story that ties their constellations together,”
Taeyong explains quietly. “Altair represents a peasant boy. Vega, a highborn maiden. They fall for
each other, but their love is forbidden because of their class. The girl is engaged to someone of her
stature.”

Ten plays close attention to his soft voice while he gazes at the sky, rapidly entranced in
everything about this moment.

“But they refuse to part and keep meeting in secret. Because of this, the girl’s parents take her
across a treacherous river and destroy its only bridge, so they can’t reach each other,” he continues.
“The boy and girl weep over their separation. But one day, a flock of magpies witnesses their
heartbreak and takes pity. They fly down to create a bridge so they can meet. They keep doing this
once a year. Deneb represents the magpies.”

Ten peers at Taeyong through the darkness.

“Star-crossed lovers,” Taeyong says. He looks at Ten.

“That’s a beautiful story.”

Taeyong leans in and kisses him.

They gaze at the stars for as long as they can until the cold becomes too much to bear.

The next day, Taeyong surprises Ten again. This time, with a package.

“What’s this?” Ten asks, sitting on the bed with it on his lap.

“Open.” Taeyong is standing in front of him.

Ten rips the plastic, which reveals a shoe box. Ten opens it. A brand-new pair of sneakers.

“Taeyong…” He doesn’t know what to say. “You—you shouldn’t have.”

“You only have one pair of boots,” Taeyong says. “I know it must be hard to wear them all the
time.”

“But.” Ten holds up one shoe. They are pristine and laced, black with small white and red accents.
The sole is sturdy. This is high-quality gear.

Ten lifts his eyes at Taeyong, trying not to cry.

“Thank you,” he manages to say.

“Did you like it? I can trade it for another color if…”

“I love them. Really. Thank you so much.”

Ten puts the sneakers aside and stands to hug Taeyong tightly.

“I’m sorry I can’t give anything in return,” Ten laments.

Taeyong cups the back of his black hair, gently stroking. “Don’t worry about it. My gift is having
you with me.”

Ten lets out a shuddering breath and relaxes in Taeyong’s embrace. He never thought Taeyong
owed him any material things just because he’s rich and Ten isn’t. He wasn’t even considering it.
But to realize Taeyong put the thought to gift him something he actually needed, something that
would bring him comfort and ease his day-to-day life, makes Ten feel cared for. It’s not about the
gift per se, it’s about the gesture.

Another Red Stain bombing, although smaller and without any casualties, results in students not
being able to go to Delphi, the town nearby. This means everyone stays cooped up inside the
Academy until break is over.

Ten resumes his classes and training. First-year students learn the starters of firearm handling and
how to use handguns of all kinds. Now in his second year, it’s time for shotguns and rifles. They
have an entire year to get to know the many subtypes. Taeyong is still the firearms teacher’s
assistant, now of the second-year grade, so whenever Ten has classes, he is there. They don’t
actively hide their relationship from people, their close friends know. But they are never overly
affectionate in public because it’s against the student code of conduct. So maybe other students
don’t know about them.

Ten is lying belly down on the ground, a SNSD rifle in his hand. The gun is propped up by the
spiked feet. The metal feels cold and comforting against the skin of his finger resting near the
trigger. He’s looking at the target, which is three-hundred yards away, through the scope. His
heartbeat is slow, his breath even. The motto of a sniper is one shot, one kill. So Ten takes his time.
He connects to his own body, connects with the rifle in his hands, like it’s an extension of him. Just
like Taeyong taught him to do last year. Ten minds the milliradians, hash marks inside the scope,
which determines the wind’s effect on the shot.

Ten prepares to shoot. He takes a couple of breaths, conscious of his natural respiratory pause, that
comes right after he exhales. That’s the steadier moment to take a shot, and Ten is training himself
for it to become second nature and take advantage of that. He fires. The bullet hits the center of the
target, a perfect shot.

“Ten Lee.” He hears his teacher call from behind.

Ten stands. “Yes, sir.”

“Well done. I’m glad to see you improved,” he says. “Keep up the good work.”

“Thank you, sir.”

When the man gives him his back, Ten can’t help but grin from excitement. He instinctively
searches for Taeyong. Surprisingly, his boyfriend is not that far, standing and watching him with a
small proud smile on his face. He wants to dash across towards him and give him a hug. He can’t,
though.

What happens is someone grabs Taeyong by his sleeve. It’s Ari.

“I need help,” she tells him.

“Okay,” Taeyong nods.

She’s a student in the class like Ten, and Taeyong is the teacher’s assistant, so of course it’s normal
for her to ask for his assistance. But the way her hand lingered there on Taeyong’s uniform, the
way she smiles at him as they walk back to her lane, the warm pitch of her voice, it all makes Ten
deflate. He remembers watching Taeyong making out with Ari last year. But he shouldn’t be
 jealous of Taeyong’s past because he trusts him. So Ten just scolds himself and gets back to
practice.

He will put this out of his mind.

Chapter End Notes

the tale about the stars is inspired by the real stories about it! there are many versions
of it, i just created my own take that fits the narrative of the fic - especially taeten's
romance.

also ten is getting good at the pew pew gunslinger ten!

 it was real enough to get me through
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Taeyong watches his boyfriend across the table. They are in the library, studying. Ten has dark
circles under his eyes, his pitch-black hair is rumpled from him running his fingers through it. He
looks tired as he types on his study tablet, which is attached to the table that provides a keyboard
so they can work easily. Ten yawns, shutting his eyes for a moment and rubbing his lids. Even
through the exhaustion, Taeyong finds him beautiful.

“We should call it for the night,” Taeyong suggests.

“You’re right. It’s late.” Ten nods.

They grab their tablets and empty cups and head out, walking side by side through the nearly
empty halls. Silence between them is comfortable.

“Spend the night,” Taeyong says before he can stop himself. It’s not Friday or Saturday, but he is
craving Ten’s warmth in his bed.

“Are you sure? We shouldn’t risk people noticing my absence too much…”

“No one wants to be a snitch here,” Taeyong says. “That’s an invitation for social ostracism.”

Taeyong is a master of societal norms, especially those surrounding the military institutions of
Corinth and the upper class. Not to brag, but he’s been navigating these waters since he was an
infant. He was born into it, disciplined under it, had it ingrained into his brain, bred influence
because of it, built relationships through it.

“Okay,” Ten smiles, and this sends a wave of infatuation all over Taeyong.

He never knew what being in love was until he met Ten. He doesn’t really know what hooked him
first, but he knows he fell hard. The more Taeyong watched him, the more they got to know each
other, the deeper his feelings ran. It isn’t just that Ten is beautiful. Taeyong has been with his share
of attractive people before, and never fell for any of them. He laid with men and women, and no
one made him lose his breath. Even Seulgi, the person he spent years fucking and who he likes as a
friend, never exerted the influence Ten has on him.

In Taeyong’s bedroom, they take turns showering. Then they lie down together and Taeyong cups
Ten’s head, stroking softly. His boyfriend’s eyelids are heavy as they stare at each other.

“Sleep, beautiful,” he says.

Ten sighs, closing his eyes. He’s asleep quickly. He’s been so tired lately.

Taeyong watches his chest go up and down, his pink lips slightly ajar, his cute nose, his long dark
lashes, his damp black bangs.

The world is a cold place. The circumstances that brought Ten to him were cruel. If Taeyong had
to choose between never meeting him, spending his life without knowing his caring touch, but
saving Ten from the trauma he endured, Taeyong would give him up without a second thought.
Ten is here, though. So what Taeyong chooses to do is make sure he’ll always protect him.
Because Ten makes his world warmer. He makes his life brighter. Ten is his safe space.

Taeyong is walking the halls in between classes when someone steps in front of him suddenly and
he bumps into them.

“Oh, hey!” It’s Ari.

“Sorry. I didn’t see you,” Taeyong says politely. He’s about to step around her when she grabs him
by the sleeve of the uniform.

“So I haven’t seen you around at the parties,” she says.

Taeyong pulls back his arm to free himself. “I’m busy.”

“Third year kicking your ass?”

Taeyong nods curtly. “I gotta go.” With that, he marches off.

It isn’t unusual for Taeyong to be approached by people like that. He used to thrive in it. Made his
life easier, when everything he needed was a fuck, a release. But since he started dating Ten, he’s
assumed the distant but polite posture. He and Ten don’t broadcast their relationship to the rest of
the school, because it’s not their business. But he also doubts knowing his commitment to Ten
would stop people from accosting him. It’s not common for people to date at this age in their
culture, because the focus is heavily placed on their military training and careers. The norm is
casual sex. Dating is saved for the late twenties, after you’ve established a military or civilian
career, and marriage follows. In the upper class, marriages are arranged by families solely for
power and influence and with the goal of continuing their bloodlines. Which is why rich people
rarely wed same-sex partners. This is why most of upper class have affairs—it’s widely spread and
known.

The fact that both Taeyong and Doyoung found people to fall in love with and actually commit is
an anomaly among their peers. Even Seulgi, who loves Irene, doesn’t admit to herself or to Irene
that. Taeyong only knows this information because one time during their first year Seulgi got too
drunk and babbled to him about her feelings when he was holding her hair as she vomited. Seulgi
blacked out that night and Taeyong never brought it up, because he knew it would embarrass her.
And Irene isn’t poor like Ten, but she’s middle class—which means the Kangs won’t let Seulgi
marry her, because the Baes bring no wealth or connections. Seulgi knows this. Which is why
Taeyong thinks she was so opposed to him dating Ten—she’s projecting her own unresolved
feelings and hang-ups. Seeing Taeyong date Ten just reinforces that she can’t date Irene. Doyoung
is the luckiest one out of them, because Jaehyun is also upper class, so their marriage would be
socially acceptable.

Lower-class folks still marry for love. But if you are born upper class, you bottle your feelings up.

That explains why Taeyong has a hard time articulating his love for Ten. He never actually said
the words. He hasn’t heard them much, not even from his family. Never from his father. His
mother occasionally. And his sister isn’t alive to say it.

He tries to show his love in other ways. With his touch, his care, his affection, his time. He’s
making do with the tools he has. Slowly, he’s trying to come up with a voice that will express what
he feels. Soon.

He doesn’t know what the future holds for them. Maybe when he graduates they’ll be apart, and
 this can cause hardships for them. Maybe they’ll stick it out. Taeyong isn’t sure. He doesn’t know
how to navigate this field, he never learned. But if the years pass and they make it, he’s going to
propose. He doesn’t give a fuck about his father’s reaction, even though he knows he’ll opposed it.
If his bloodline is so important, they can hire a surrogate and inseminate with Taeyong’s sperm.

As Ten steps out of the bathroom after a shower, Taeyong is waiting for him, sitting in bed.

“Do you know what day it is?” Taeyong asks.

Ten glances up at him. Then he smiles. “You remember.”

“Of course I remember.” Taeyong smiles too.

Ten comes to his side and sits on his lap, as Taeyong puts his arms around his waist.

“The fourteen. One-year anniversary since our first date,” Ten says, pleased.

“Exactly.”

Ten cups Taeyong’s face between his hands and kisses him. Their lips meet softly. Ten is warm
and smells of the Academy shampoo. Taeyong’s palms tighten around him, bringing their bodies
closer. Taeyong nibbles his bottom lip and Ten produces a quiet whimper. That, along with the
kissing and the proximity, is enough to spark a reaction out of Taeyong’s cock.

“You’re beautiful, did you know that?” Taeyong whispers, trying to distract himself from his own
arousal.

Ten giggles. “It’s what you tell me. I don’t know if I believe you.”

Taeyong knows he’s only joking. He smiles. “Too bad we didn’t have time to have a choco pie
under the tree like we did last year.”

“Maybe we can have a choco pie now.”

“You already brushed your teeth,” Taeyong teases.

“I can brush them again. For choco pie.”

They laugh and Taeyong pulls a package from the drawer. They each get one.

“Cheers,” he says.

“Cheers,” Ten smiles.

Chapter End Notes

i hope this clarifies some things always nice to see taeyong's pov too
 your touch brought forth an incandescent glow
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

It is a Saturday afternoon. Ten and Taeyong are hanging out outside, far from the main building, in
the spot Taeyong took him to look at the stars during winter break. But now they are here during
the day, because, well, Jaehyun and Doyoung are in Taeyong’s room. So they decided to enjoy the
outdoors and breathe in some fresh air.

Taeyong is sitting with his legs stretched, Ten’s head on his lap. Taeyong gently strokes Ten’s
pitch-black hair while they talk about nothing in particular, their classes and how their week went.

“So yeah, I basically got another A+ in my Strategy paper,” Ten is telling him.

“You only get A’s,” Taeyong points out.

Ten blushes. “I guess.”

“And you’re at the top of class in firearms training.”

“I am not,” Ten protests and giggles.

“You are. Remember, I am the teacher’s assistant.”

Ten locks eyes with him. Taeyong is smiling.

“Are you serious?”

Taeyong nods. “If you keep this up, you’ll get that Peitharchía scholarship.”

That’s all Ten wants.

“And then… that means we’ll be in the same place again,” Ten realizes.

“I know,” Taeyong nods, fingers caressing the top of Ten’s head. “Wouldn’t that be great?”

“It would.”

They never talked about the future before. Ten is afraid to mention it or think about it. He knows
Taeyong is graduating this semester and Ten will continue his studies, so they’ll inevitably be
apart.

“Is that something you want?” Ten risks asking.

“To have you around?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s what I want most.”

Ten’s belly flutters. He sits up.

“Taeyong…”
His boyfriend regards him. Ten pushes him against the grass, hands on his chest, and kisses him
firmly. He wants to show how much he means to him, wants to give him his affection. Taeyong
cups Ten’s nape. Their lips part and tongues meet, familiar and heated. Taeyong licks into him and
Ten lets him steer the touch. They kiss until Ten is breathless.

Taeyong suddenly flips them around, not all the way on top of Ten. Taeyong’s hand explores the
curve of Ten’s chest over the uniform shirt, until the waist, clutching it hard. Then it slides back up
leisurely, savoring, and rests over Ten’s neck, his thumb grazing the jawline. Taeyong slows the
kiss until he stops, and Ten opens his eyes to realize his boyfriend is staring at him, his pupils
blown against his gray irises. Ten wonders what goes on in his head.

Taeyong opens his mouth, but Ten deposits his index finger over it.

“Kiss me harder,” Ten says the words in a hoarse voice.

His gray eyes glint. Taeyong softly kisses the tip of Ten’s finger, then grabs his hand, interlacing
their fingers and landing them together on the grass. After piercing into Ten with his enigmatic
stare, Taeyong finally obeys. He kisses the skin of Ten’s neck. He nibbles and licks it while Ten
bites his bottom lip in a failed attempt to stifle his noises. Something about Taeyong’s touch feels
different, sweeter.

“Ten.” He whispers near his ear.

Ten whines. He can feel Taeyong’s erection against his thigh.

Ten stretches his head away so Taeyong can continue lavishing his neck. Taeyong mouths him
deeper. Ten feels like they are miles away, under the sun on a tropical island. Everything but them
disappears from his mind. Taeyong moves his lips to kiss Ten on the mouth, and the touch
intensifies. The moment unfolds while fire pools in Ten’s center.

“Touch me harder.”

Ten wants to feel Taeyong’s strength against his flesh, wants to be kneaded.

Taeyong lets go of Ten’s hand and catches his face.

“Ah—” Ten lets escape with the influence it exerts on him.

Taeyong takes Ten’s parted lips as an opportunity to push his tongue into his mouth and kiss him
hard, just like Ten asked. He whimpers as Taeyong holds him against the ground and pushes their
mouths together relentlessly. He nibbles Ten’s lips as his fingers dig into Ten’s hair, clutching it
tightly. Ten holds him in the embrace.

While they kiss, Taeyong’s palm skims down to Ten’s thigh, digging into the muscle. The touch is
heated, wanting. Taeyong’s desire is so clear, almost cutting. And Ten basks in it, feeling his own
arousal rise alongside it. His cock strains against his clothes, leaking precum. In the Academy,
there is no such thing as privacy to masturbate, so Ten doesn’t. But now, as Taeyong kisses and
touches him like that, and they have the rare privacy to be away from people, he starts craving
pressure on his erection.

Letting his wants guide him, he puts his hand over Taeyong’s and pulls it up over his cock.
Taeyong stops the kiss to look at him, his pupils blown, his lips reddened.

Ten nods.
Taeyong kisses him again, slower now, as he rubs the erection. Ten lets out a muffled moan. The
fiery sensation that spreads through Ten’s body as Taeyong touches him is mind-blowing. They
keep this up until Ten is spilling quiet noises, and he fears he might cum in his pants.

With a trembling hand, Ten unbuckles his belt and as Taeyong notices what he’s doing, they stop
kissing to open the pants next and lower his underwear until his dick is out. Taeyong turns Ten on
his side by the hip and cuddles him. Ten curls up on the ground as Taeyong’s big hand closes
around his cock, Taeyong’s lips on his nape, Taeyong’s erection pressed on his ass.

“Ahh!” Ten squeezes his eyes shut as Taeyong strokes his length up and down.

He can feel Taeyong lightly rut against him, his warm breath on his skin. The intimacy of it
drowns Ten in pure bliss, and all he recognizes beside himself is Taeyong’s existence.

It doesn’t take long for Ten’s orgasm to hit him, blinding and powerful, sending a shudder through
all his body as he spills on the grass. He halts the movement by touching Taeyong’s wrist. They
are both heaving after it. Taeyong kisses Ten’s nape before turning around. Ten can hear him
moving but doesn’t understand what he’s doing until he hears him groaning. Ten lies on his back
and puts his cock inside his clothes, zipping it up, as he watches Taeyong’s back. He sits up and
sees Taeyong just came over the grass too.

Taeyong is panting when he puts himself together and sits next to Ten, pulling him for a kiss.
Taeyong smiles at him.

“I could have…” Ten starts to say.

“It’s okay,” Taeyong says. “I was about to burst in my pants, and that would have made a mess.”

They laugh. Ten wraps his arms around Taeyong’s neck and brushes their noses together before
another kiss.

“This was amazing,” Ten says.

“It was. You are amazing.”

“You are.”

Taeyong shakes his head and smiles, sealing their lips together.

They go back to the Academy to have dinner.

Later, Ten showers in his bathroom’s dorm and finds Jaehyun sitting on his bed when he returns to
the room.

“Hey, you!” Ten greets him cheerfully. He’s in an amazing mood.

And by the way Jaehyun smiles, he’s in a good mood as well. Ten sits in front of him.

“You look well,” Ten says, noticing how Jaehyun’s eyes seem to shine brighter.

Jaehyun nervously chuckles. “I have something to tell you.”

“I do too. But go first.”

“Well. It happened. Doyoung and I slept together. All the way.”

 Ten takes his hand and squeezes it. “Jaehyunnie!” he squeals quietly.

Jaehyun is just beaming.

“How was it?”

“It was the best,” Jaehyun says, sighing content. “He was so gentle and loving. I was the one
that… you know. And it didn’t hurt at all. It feels really good, Ten. It was new, different type of
pleasure. It was totally worth it.”

Ten pulls him into a hug. “I’m so happy for you. You deserve nothing less.”

“Thank you, Tennie.”

They separate.

“What about you? What do you have to tell me?” Jaehyun asks.

“It’s not as exciting as yours,” Ten says, smiling timidly. “But Taeyong,” he lowers his voice,
“touched me. That way.”

Jaehyun grins and Ten giggles.

“Did you enjoy it?”

Ten nods.

“Someone is going to do my homework for a month,” Jaehyun teases.

They laugh.

“I will gladly do your homework,” Ten says.

If it means that Ten lost a bet because he has a boyfriend like Taeyong, he doesn’t mind.

Chapter End Notes

they are making plans

 my house of stone, your ivy grows and now i’m covered in you
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten has his hands against the damp wall. The hot water of the shower is hitting his nape. His
noises fill the bathroom. Taeyong is right behind him, their bodies meshed together, skin to skin,
wet and feverish. Taeyong strokes Ten’s length, carrying him to his peak, while his other hand is
wrapped across Ten’s center, holding him tightly.

“Ahh! Ahh!” Ten vocalizes the pleasure he’s feeling. “Taeyong—” with a strangled whine, he
comes to completion, his body shuddering.

He’s panting and exhausted after, but this doesn’t stop him from turning around and kissing
Taeyong, his hand closing around his boyfriend’s erection. He rubs him up and down, their
foreheads touching, as the water splashes his back.

“F-fuck,” Taeyong groans. One of his palms is on Ten’s waist, the other on Ten’s upper arm.

“Like this?” Ten checks. He knows how to masturbate his own thing, but he’s still learning how to
please Taeyong, and he wants to do it right.

“Yeah,” Taeyong rasps. “Keep going. Faster.”

Ten ups the speed and Taeyong lets out a harsh moan, his hand tightening around Ten’s arm
sharply. Ten watches as Taeyong squeezes his eyes shut, his mouth open, breathing in pants.

“God, Ten—”

The sound of Taeyong’s high fills the room, satisfying and lovely. His cum spills on Ten’s hand.
He stops when Taeyong is done, and they hold each other tight. Ten can faintly sense the imprint
Taeyong left in his biceps from holding it too toughly. It doesn’t hurt too much, though.

They finish their shower and get into bed together. Tiredness has set in Ten’s bones like a heavy
anvil. As finals approach, they’ve been studying and practicing too much, to the point where they
only get an average of four hours of sleep every night. With an orgasm added to that, Ten can feel
himself quickly slipping into slumber as Taeyong cradles him.

“I’ve never fallen asleep with someone other than you.”

Taeyong’s voice brings Ten back to awareness. It takes him a second to process what he heard.

“What?”

“I’ve never slept beside anyone else,” Taeyong explains. “The first times I fucked someone and
ended up sharing a bed, I could never fall asleep. I don’t know why, but it never happened.”

Ten focuses on the gray of Taeyong’s eyes.

“Then that night came. When I invited you over for the first time,” he continues. “We hadn’t done
anything. And I had no intention of falling asleep because I simply thought it wouldn’t happen.”

“You were willing to spend the entire night awake?” Ten checks.
Taeyong nods. “But after you fell asleep, I quickly followed.” He strokes Ten’s cheek, staring into
him fondly. “That’s when I knew something was different between us.”

“Taeyong…” Ten brings their faces together, lips hovering on each other. Taeyong embraces him
closer.

A whirlwind of emotions sweeps Ten off his feet. A tear opens in his chest, a starlit gash that
simultaneously pains and soothes him. He’s filled to the brim with it until he’s choking on the
words he knows he has to say, because they’ve been building up for a while.

“I love you.”

It’s said, simple and done. Ten feels uncountable times lighter. He doesn’t expect Taeyong to say
anything in return, he only experiences the peace of outing this true one emotion that’s been living
inside him.

“I love you too.”

Then Taeyong kisses him, and it takes Ten away, far and beyond, into the open dark sky that has
waited for them through all eternity. They rise and take their places as stars, shining brighter than a
thousand suns. They complete and belong and exist there, and it feels like they were always there
to begin with, like the void they occupy together is meant for them as they hold each other.
Nothing can take away from it, or taint it, or destroy it. It’s eternal like stardust—it may shape and
change, but’s it’s always there.

Without another word, they fall fast asleep. As one.

Ten and Taeyong barely have time to each other in the last months of the semester. But when the
exams arrive, they are ready and excel in them. They finally catch up on sleep and enjoy the
privacy of Taeyong’s room to please one another in the way that’s becoming familiar and intimate.

A couple of days before the end of the school year, the announcement of the five top graduating
students is set on the electronic bulletin board near the entrance hall. The ones that got a
scholarship for the Peitharchía Institute. Ten, Taeyong, Jaehyun and Doyoung make their way
there as a group, and there is a commotion in front of the board. On green letters against a black
screen, Ten can read:

1. Lee Taeyong
2. Kim Doyoung
3. Irene Bae
4. Nakamoto Yuta
5. Moon Taeil

Ten turns to Taeyong to scan his reaction. He looks happy, but calm. Ten knows he’ll decline the
grant because his family can pay, so another student can benefit from it, but being the top student
of his class must be good. Ten is so proud of him. He wants to give him a tight hug, but holds
himself back, because they need privacy for that. Instead, he squeezes his hand once.

“Congratulations,” he says.
Taeyong smiles. “Thank you.”

The students gather for an impromptu ‘graduation’ party for the third-year students.

Ten is cheery but not too drunk, happily chatting with Jaehyun, Doyoung and Taeyong, while
music plays in the background. The next morning, they are all going home. Ten and Taeyong
haven’t discussed their plans for the summer except for stating they will try to see each other as
much as they can. Taeyong will be busy with the procedures to apply to the Institute though.

“Let’s all meet each other at least once,” Jaehyun says.

They all agree.

After a while, Taeyong leans in Ten’s ear.

“My room?”

Ten nods. They say their goodbyes to their friends and leave, hand in hand. They walk through the
darkened corridors in silence until they reach Taeyong’s bedroom, removing their boots and
leaving them by the door.

“Ten.”

He turns to Taeyong, who closes the distance and places his hands on Ten’s waist. They look at
each other, gray on dark brown. Ten can feel Taeyong’s breath softly fan against his face, and it
smells of alcohol. Taeyong grasps Ten’s uniform shirt and pulls it up, freeing it from the pants. He
proceeds to unbutton it slowly, never wavering his gaze. Ten lets his boyfriend strips his shirt and
undershirt, exposing his chest. Taeyong runs his warm palms over Ten’s chest, lightly thumbing
his nipple.

“Ahh—”

Taeyong places kisses on Ten’s lips and down to the curve of his neck, as Ten flutters his eyes
shut. Taeyong continues removing Ten’s clothes, opening his belt, pushing down pants and
underwear. When Ten is naked, Taeyong begins working on his own, and Ten helps him.
Everything is paced and calm, and Ten likes how familiar it feels to be this close, to bare their
bodies in front of the other. As Taeyong’s briefs fall on the ground, he leads Ten towards the bed,
lying him down and climbing on top of him, in between the legs that spread to welcome him.

They kiss unhurriedly, enjoying and tenderly. Ten’s fingers crawl into Taeyong’s blond hair as
their tongues dance together. Their bodies heat, their cocks harden. Taeyong plays with Ten,
clutching his strands, fondling his asscheek, kneading the muscle of his thigh, rubbing his nipple.
Ten gasps throughout, as his arousal rises with the way Taeyong touches and cares for him.

Taeyong shifts, putting some distance between them, and closes his hand on Ten’s leaking cock.
With their foreheads resting together and labored breaths, Taeyong strokes the length leisurely.
Pleasure pulses through Ten like a drug, overrunning every part of him.

“Let me suck you off,” Taeyong whispers.

Ten open his eyes. Taeyong is watching him.

“Yeah.”

He wants it, he’s ready. He enjoys all the ways Taeyong handles him, sometimes softly sometimes
roughly.

Taeyong kisses his lips before dragging his mouth down the skin, to his neck and collarbone. Then
he licks and nibbles Ten’s chest, sucking the nipple, making him whine. Ten touches the top of
Taeyong’s head gently as he goes down Ten’s body, belly, and hipbones. Taeyong repositions in
bed and holds Ten’s length by the base. Ten glances at him. Taeyong licks the head of his cock and
Ten whimpers with the wet softness of it. Taeyong goes on, coating it with saliva, lavishing the
sensitive skin with devotion. Ten is mesmerized. Taeyong swallows the head.

“Ahh!” Ten moans and chews his bottom lip.

His cock disappears inside Taeyong’s mouth.

“My God…” he rasps.

Taeyong sucks him up and down, tongue playing with the underside. Ten’s body feels on fire, his
legs start to shake. His moans grow in volume and length. Taeyong doesn’t falter and Ten
surrenders under his affection.

“Taeyong—” Ten calls his name in a trembling moan, as the pleasure becomes too much,
overflowing and hitting him hard.

He spills into Taeyong’s tongue, who drinks all of it. Ten sprawls on the bed after the earth-
shattering orgasm, and Taeyong climbs back on top of him and kisses him. Ten holds him and
takes a moment to come back to himself. He looks at Taeyong.

“Let me do the same for you,” he says.

“You don’t have to—”

“I want to.”

Ten turns them around. Taeyong looks happily surprised.

“You don’t have to swallow it,” he says, as Ten moves down.

“I want to swallow it.”

Taeyong’s eyes go wide and Ten grins.

“Give me directions,” Ten says, before sticking his tongue out and licking Taeyong’s cock.

Taeyong groans. “Okay. Just… you can focus on the head. I’m very sensitive there. Try to avoid
scraping your teeth on it.”

“Got it.” Ten nods.

He begins licking the head of Taeyong’s cock. He pays attention to his groans, enjoys them, enjoys
making Taeyong squirm. Ten tests putting the top part of the erection past his lips, making the head
drag on the ceiling of his mouth and the start of his throat. He bobs his head up and down,
lavishing it with his tongue.

“Fuck, Ten…”

He keeps going, upping the pace. Taeyong moans as he watches. When his noises get loud, soon
he’s shaking and cumming in Ten’s mouth. He swallows it and moves up, back to Taeyong’s arms.
 They kiss languidly.

“I’ll miss you,” Taeyong whispers. “So much.”

Ten smiles. “I’ll miss you too.”

They look at each other.

“We’ll text all summer,” Ten says.

“We’ll see each other as much as we can,” Taeyong adds.

When next fall semester starts and Ten gets back to the Academy for his third year, Taeyong will
also be at the Institute, which means their phones will be prohibited. No way to contact each other
directly except through electronic mail that’s sent and delivered by the administrations, much like
trading letters.

“I can make the trip to see you during winter break,” Taeyong says. “We can meet in Delphi.”

“Okay. I’ll be waiting.”

Taeyong smiles. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Chapter End Notes

see? that's how taeyong knew he truly likes ten, that they have something special it
was as simple as falling asleep beside him. the emotional implications of this are huge
though. he feels safe with ten! he doesn't feel safe with others!!! he grew up
traumatized by grief and emotionally constipated. but taeyong and ten created a loving
dynamic that makes their harsh realities better
 your opal eyes are all I wish to see
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten is happy to be home for the summer. He missed his parents and his dad’s food. He takes time
to rest and hang out with them as much as he can, which is not a lot because they work long hours.
But even so, his dad makes sure to leave home-cooked meals for him.

Ten keeps in contact with Taeyong and Jaehyun through texting.

TY: I wanna come visit you.

TEN: My neighborhood isn’t safe.

TY: I can take care of myself. I wanna meet your family.

Ten chews his bottom lip.

TEN: You don’t have to do that.

TY: But I want to. And I want you to meet mine too.

Ten’s belly flutters with nerves, but he smiles. Taeyong is so serious about them. He’s not ashamed
of Ten, doesn’t care that he’s poor. So Ten shouldn’t be ashamed of himself either.

TEN: Okay. Let’s do it!

They decide that Taeyong will visit Ten first. Ten explains as much as he can about the area his
home is located, how he shares a one-bedroom apartment with parents and sleeps in the living
room, so they won’t really have privacy.

The day Taeyong arrives, Ten waits for him in the entrance of his building. The streets are a land
of stained concrete, with walls that extend far up until the sky, almost impossibly high. The people
that walk around do so in a straight-forward manner, looking ahead, unapproachable. A shiny black
car pulls up and Taeyong exits, looking pristine in a black shirt and pants, his blond hair pulled
back. He grabs a huge basket from inside the car and walks up to Ten, who smiles but is confused.

“Yongie!”

“Hi, love,” Taeyong smiles.

“Let’s go up. Standing around in the street isn’t a good idea.”

They ride the elevator up to Ten’s apartment.

“What’s that?” Ten asks.

“You and your parents are welcoming me into your home, so it’s fair I bring a gift,” Taeyong
explains.

“Oh.”

They enter the living space and take off their shoes. Ten’s parents, renamed Jongdae and Jimin
after arriving in Corinth, are still working and will return so they can have dinner together. The
apartment consists of three rooms, the main one, where the kitchen, a table and Ten’s single
mattress are, the bedroom that fits only a double bed and a trunk for clothes, and a tiny bathroom.
They keep it clean and tidy, but the place is bare, with no furniture or adornments. Everything is
utilitarian, white or steel.

“We keep it minimalistic,” Ten says in an attempt to make light of the situation.

Louis and Leon are sleeping on his parents’ mattress inside the bedroom. Taeyong puts the basket
over the table and Ten inspects it. It’s an assortment of things. A bottle of wine, fine chocolates,
choco pies—this makes Ten smile—and fruits. The last time Ten has seen a piece of fruit was back
in Daw. Ten’s heart warms at the thoughtful gift.

Taeyong wraps his arms around Ten from behind. Their bodies mold together comfortably and Ten
shuts his eyes, sighing content, having Taeyong next to him after a month apart. Taeyong kisses his
nape. Ten turns in his arms and smiles at him.

“I missed you.”

“Me too,” Taeyong says. “I can’t stop thinking about you.”

Ten kisses him, desperate to taste him. The touch deepens quickly, tongues dragging together.
Taeyong’s hands cup Ten’s ass, griping the muscle hard and pulling them against each other. Ten
whines. He pushes Taeyong towards his mattress as they kiss. Taeyong drops down and Ten
straddles him. They keep kissing desperately as Ten grinds against him. Taeyong mouths to his
neck.

“Ahh!”

Ten slides his hand down to Taeyong’s zipper, opening it up. They fumble as they release their
erections from their pants and into their hands. They moan in unison as they stroke the other. In
between gasps and kisses, they take each other to completion. After their breaths even, they get up
and take turns washing their hands on the bathroom sink. They dry them, and Taeyong pulls Ten
into his arms again, kissing all over his face and neck.

“I have something else for you.”

“What?” Ten asks.

Taeyong pulls them to sit on the mattress again. He takes a small black velvet box out of his pocket
and offers it to Ten, who glances at it curiously. He hesitates but takes and opens it.

Ten’s jaw drops.

A white gold ring with three diamonds, side by side.

“What… what’s this?”

“A commitment band,” Taeyong says steadily.

Ten can’t tear his eyes from the shine of the stones. “A commit—A what? Are these real
diamonds?”

“Yes.”
Real diamonds. They cost a fortune. This ring probably costs more than it would to buy Ten’s
apartment. It costs more than anything Ten had or would ever own.

“I can’t accept this,” he finally says. “It’s—it’s too much. I could never repay it.”

“I don’t want you to repay me.”

“But… What if I lose it?”

This makes Taeyong laugh. “Then I’ll buy another one.”

Ten reddens, pursing his lips, and punches Taeyong’s arm lightly.

“Are you serious?” Ten asks, looking at him. “What does a commitment band mean?”

Ten doesn’t understand. In Daw, no one gave rings to their partners. When a Dawi couple marries,
they get matching traditional tattoos. Ten’s parents have a small intricate circle over the left chest,
on top of the heart.

“It means I’m with you,” Taeyong explains quietly, his gray eyes attentive on Ten. “Only you. I
wanted to give you a token of my love, something that you can hold on to while we’re away. I
know it’s lavish and virtually useless, but at the very least I know you’ll be cared for if something
happens to me.”

“Taeyong…” Ten worries. “Don’t say that. Nothing will happen to you.”

Taeyong cups Ten’s cheek and thumbs the skin gently.

“Thank you,” Ten says. “It’s beautiful.”

“Try it on,” Taeyong smiles softly.

Ten picks it up. “Which one?”

Taeyong takes the ring and slides it on the fourth finger. It fits perfectly. Ten observes it.

“How did you know my size?”

Taeyong smirks. “I measure when you were asleep.”

“So you’ve been planning this for a while?”

“Yes.”

Ten chuckles. “I can’t believe you.”

They kiss and hug.

“I probably can’t wear this all the time, though,” Ten explains. “Not here, not in the Academy.”
Jewelry is against their dress code.

“I have a solution,” Taeyong digs into his pocket again and brings out a white gold string. “You
can put this around your neck and hang the ring from it. So it stays close to you at all times.”

Ten loves that idea. They do just that, and Ten hides the band under his shirt, the coldness over his
sternum.
They hang out until Ten’s parents arrive. Ten introduces Taeyong, who is very respectful and
friendly towards them. Ten’s parents seem to like him, but it’s probably because Ten has
mentioned how Taeyong makes him happy. They have dinner and Taeyong insists on doing the
dishes after.

Ten and Taeyong say their goodbyes at the building’s entrance, where the car comes to pick
Taeyong up again.

Ten messages Jaehyun, and the four of them decide to meet up for dinner. The day of, Taeyong
picks Ten up early in the morning.

“Where are we going?” Ten asks excitedly.

“Surprise.” Taeyong smiles.

Ten watches the city through the window. “You know I’ve never ridden in a car before.” It’s
unusual for people to own private cars in Corinth. They are luxury items. But the public transport
system makes up for this.

“No?” Taeyong asks.

Ten shakes his head.

They make their way to another part of the Capital, where everything is cleaner, and people look
well dressed. There are shiny shops and restaurants and coffee shops. The car stops at one of these
fancy places and they exit.

“First, breakfast,” Taeyong says.

They hold hands and enter, where the hostess welcomes them with a smile. They get seated and
Ten browses the menu on his phone, which automatically downloaded information about the
restaurant as they walked inside. The names of the dishes and drinks are all strange to him.

“I don’t know what to order,” he confesses.

“I can do it for you,” Taeyong offers.

Ten nods. He trusts him.

Soon, the server brings a jar of orange liquid and many types of pastries. Ten tastes a bit of
everything while they chat about nothing in particular.

“All of this is delicious. Thank you,” Ten smiles, appreciative that Taeyong is treating him to such
a lavish breakfast. He knows it doesn’t make a dent in Taeyong’s wallet and his boyfriend is used
to eating like that, but still.

After, they ride the car to another location.

“What are we doing here?” Ten asks as they enter a store.

“Mr. Lee,” a saleswoman approaches with a smile. “Welcome back. Shall we?”

She leads them to a private room, with a large mirror, upholstered beige poufs, and a fitting room
with a red curtain.
“Champagne?” the saleswoman asks.

“Sure,” Taeyong answers.

She leaves.

“We need to get you a suit,” Taeyong explains, turning to Ten and clutching his waist. He kisses
him. “For the dinner date.”

“Oh…” Ten understands. He probably doesn’t have proper clothing for the upscale restaurant they
are going with Jaehyun and Doyoung. Right now, he’s wearing his torn black jeans and battered
white t-shirt.

Two salespersons arrive, one bringing champagne and the other a rack with multiple jackets, shirts,
pants, ties, and shoes. Ten browses through it, deciding he likes black best. He’s a simple man, and
black is a simple color. He puts on a black suit and a white shirt and steps out to show to Taeyong,
who lights up when he sees it.

“You look incredible.”

“Thank you,” Ten smiles. “This feels nice. It’s so soft.”

Taeyong chuckles and sips champagne.

Ten tries other sets until he decides on one, then picks a pair of lustrous oxfords to go along with it.

Next, they head to a spa. It all starts with separate immersion hot bath, scented with herbs and
flowers. Then body scrubs, a facial, and massages. They have lunch, then do steam room for a
while, and after get manicures and pedicures. It ends with a shared bath in a jet tub, where Ten
leans into Taeyong’s embrace and accidentally naps for a few of minutes, after all the relaxation
his body was put through.

They dress in their suits and reach the restaurant to meet Jaehyun and Doyoung. The place is
beautiful, on a rooftop, with high ceilings and huge windows that show the view of the city. Their
table is near those, so Ten can marvel at the lights that shine from the many buildings that stretch
across the Capital.

Jaehyun and Doyoung arrived shortly after, and they all greet with hugs. Couples sit across from
each other. Ten lets Taeyong order for him, and they share a bottle of red wine.

“So, what are you planning to specialize at the Institute?” Jaehyun asks.

“If everything goes well, Cybersecurity,” Doyoung answers.

“I want to work with Intelligence,” Taeyong says.

“What about you two?” Doyoung asks.

“I want to pledge Counterintelligence,” Jaehyun says.

They all look at Ten, who was sipping his wine. “If I manage to get the grant, I’m considering
Policy or National Defense.”

Going for Policy means vying for a position of power in Corinth’s government, with the possibility
to participate in lawmaking. But National Defense means a high-level job that deals with anti-
terrorism, if Ten chooses to follow that path. He’d have the chance to combat extremist groups like
 the Red Stain.

“You will get the scholarship, Tennie,” Jaehyun says kindly.

Taeyong puts his hand over Ten’s, which is on top of the table. “You will.”

“You guys don’t know that,” Ten protests.

“You’re the best of your class,” Taeyong insists.

Ten chuckles, his cheek heating up.

They continue with dinner and Ten has delicious chocolate cake for dessert.

On the ride back to Ten’s home, he and Taeyong make out in the back of the car. There is a
partition up that separates them from the driver.

They kiss goodbye one last time before Ten leaves.

Chapter End Notes

angst is coming
 you loved the amber skies so much
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Barefooted, Taeyong follows the melody. It is faint at first, growing as he approaches the music
room. The door is ajar, and he opens it without making a noise. The place is large, sky-blue walls
carved with intricate white plaster, the big windows letting light in and showing the gardens of the
estate, with golden light fixtures and crystal chandeliers.

Taeyong halts and watches his mother play the white grand piano with her eyes closed, her blond
hair tied in a neat low bun. He waits.

When she finishes the song, she looks at him with the same gray eyes he has and smiles.

“How long have you been there?” Eunji asks.

“Not that long.”

She moves her wheelchair away from the piano and towards Taeyong, who walks up to meet her.

“How are you, darling?”

“I’m alright. I have something to tell you,” Taeyong says, feeling nervous for the first time.

“Tell me.”

Taeyong grabs the handles of the wheelchair and moves her near one of the windows. He sits on a
chair in front of her, clasping his hands together. Her kind eyes stare at him as he takes a deep
breath.

“I met someone,” Taeyong says. “Someone special.”

“A girl?” Eunji’s eyes go round.

“A boy. A man.” Taeyong corrects himself. Ten isn’t a boy anymore.

Eunji smiles. “At the Academy?”

Taeyong nods. “I want you to meet him.”

“It’s that serious?” she asks.

“Yes. Mom, I love him.”

“Oh, darling.” She takes his hand. “I’m so happy you found someone. And yes, I want to meet
him.”

Taeyong sighs relieved. The easy part is over. Now the uncomfortable part.

He trails to his father’s office. Penumbra is settled there, curtain shut, the only light coming from a
yellow desk lamp. Seojun, his black hair peppered with white, is bent over his work tablet, reading
something on its screen. Taeyong knocks on the door twice.
“Come in,” he says, without looking at him.

Taeyong walks and stands a good distance away from the desk, spine straight, hands behind his
back.

“I—”

Seojun raises his finger at him. Taeyong closes his mouth and waits. When his father finishes, he
places his elbows on the desk, puts his hands together, and looks at Taeyong with an unamused
stare. Taeyong is used to his indifference after twenty years of living with him. He suspects Seojun
only ever loved his daughter.

“I have to address something, sir,” Taeyong says calmly.

Seojun gestures with his hand for him to continue.

“I’ve started seeing someone from the Academy. I am asking permission to bring him home to
meet you and mother.”

His father squints. “You’re wasting your time with relationships, Taeyong?”

Taeyong opens his mouth to answer but his father continues.

“And you want to waste my time with it, too? I have work.”

Taeyong thinks he might choke.

“But whatever. Have her over.”

“He.”

“What?”

“It’s a man, sir.”

Seojun studies him. “You will have kids.” It sounds like a threat.

“Surrogacy,” Taeyong rushes to say.

“If it lasts. You are looking at years of hard work ahead of you,” Seojun says. “There are things
about your future we need to discuss. But I’m busy now, so leave.”

“Yes, sir.”

Taeyong leaves before his father says anything else.

The car picks Ten up early in the morning. The drive to Taeyong’s house is one and a half hours
long. Ten watches the concrete city through the window until he crosses a long tunnel that cuts
through a mountain. When he reaches the other side, all he sees are high walls with large gates.
The car finally turns to one of them, waiting as the gate slowly slides to the side. When they enter,
Ten’s jaw drops.
There is green everywhere. Trees, manicured grass and bushes, flowers, a water fountain. The next
thing Ten sees is the giant white manor that sprawls across the grounds, rising up to four stories.
The car halts at the front doors, where Taeyong is waiting for him with a smile. Ten hops out of
the car and walks towards him, still processing everything he’s seen. They hug.

“Hey,” Taeyong says and gives him a kiss. “Come.” He takes his hand and pulls him in.

The walls are white and detailed with plaster, there is a crystal chandelier hanging in the middle of
the ceiling, fine red rugs with intricate patterns stretched, and a bifurcated stair that leads to the
second floor, while two large doorframes in each side of the room show other areas. Ten realizes
he’s gaping, taking it all in. He looks at Taeyong, who’s gazing at him gently, and gets himself
together.

“Your home is very nice,” he says.

“Thank you. Let me take you up.” Taeyong grabs his hands and guides him.

They climb the stairs and walk through the well-lit halls. They move until open double-doors, and
step into a sky-blue room, just as beautiful and tastefully decorated as the rest of the house. Ten’s
eyes land on a person sitting in a wheelchair by the window.

“Mom,” Taeyong calls as they stroll inside.

The woman uses the wheels to turn around. She’s beautiful, a feminine, mature version of
Taeyong, with blond hair tied in a bun. She’s wearing a classy and long white dress. She glances at
him and opens a smile.

“Hello, Ten.”

Ten smiles back nervously. “Hi, ma’am.”

“This is my mom,” Taeyong says.

“You can call me Eunji,” she says. “I prepared us breakfast. Shall we eat?”

There is a round table set near a window, filled with pastries, sweets, orange juice, coffee, milk,
and tea.

“I’m sorry my husband isn’t here,” Eunji starts. “He tried taking time off work, but an emergency
arose.”

“That’s okay,” Ten says, aiming to keep his voice steady.

“Taeyong tells me you met at the Academy,” Eunji says as she pours herself some tea.

“Yes. I’m starting my third year in the fall.” Ten nods.

Taeyong serves Ten some coffee, knowing what he wants without needing to ask.

“Ten is at the top of his classes,” Taeyong says. Ten blushes. “He’s on the path to join the
Institute.”

“We need more brilliant students in Peitharchía,” she says. “With the way things are going here
and in the world, our country needs to stay safe.”

Taeyong puts a pastry on Ten’s plate, because Ten has made no motion to eat. He’s being shy and
Taeyong knows this.

“I agree,” Ten says. “Did you go to the Institute?”

“I joined the army,” Eunji explains. “Special Forces.”

This surprises Ten. Eunji looks very small. Even sitting in the wheelchair, he can assess she’s
shorter than him. She was probably very muscular before the car accident.

“That’s badass.” Ten decides to be honest.

Taeyong and his mother laugh.

“What was it like?” Ten asks.

“The first months were hard. Even though it’s common to have women in the army, the Special
Forces are another level of difficulty. The stakes are high. The training is the hardest thing I’ve
ever been through. Childbirth was a walk in the park after that.”

“Wow.” Ten goes.

Taeyong grabs his phone and sifts through it.

“I have so many stories, but they are R-rated,” Eunji says.

Ten chuckles.

“Here.” Taeyong shows Ten his screen.

Ten looks. It’s a picture of a young smiling Eunji, standing in a military uniform, her blond hair in
a side braid.

“She moved to a commanding position quicker than anyone before,” Taeyong says.

“Taeyong is just flattering me. I had to,” Eunji explains. “I was engaged to your father, and I
needed to marry and have kids.”

They keep chatting, Eunji sharing stories from her days at the Academy and the military. Ten feels
bad that he has to lie to her about his place of birth—he claims he was born in the Capital. But he
doesn’t hide the fact that he is working class.

They talk until lunch, and then they go to the dining room, a big space with light yellow walls, the
same style of plaster as the rest of the house and golden fixtures. Taeyong wheels his mom all the
way there, and places her at the head of the long table that sits many. Ten and Taeyong take the
seats to each of her sides, and soon a servant in a burgundy uniform brings their food and drinks.

After lunch, Eunji excuses herself to her chambers.

Taeyong pulls Ten by the hand until they cross double doors that reveal a large room. The curtains
are drawn wide, the dossel and bedding are black. There are two open doors that show a closet and
a bathroom. Taeyong takes off his shoes and Ten does too. Taeyong shuts the door and heads
towards the bed, Ten following. They sit.

“Your mom is very nice,” Ten says. “Too bad your dad isn’t around.”

“It’s more of a blessing, actually,” Taeyong says. “But forget about him. Lay down with me.”
They climb onto the comfortable bed and lie side by side, looking into each other’s eyes.

“I have something for you,” Ten says quietly.

Taeyong hums, interested. Ten takes it from his pocket and shows him. Taeyong’s eyes widen, his
jaw drops.

“Is this…”

“A photograph.”

A small, paper, printed photo of Ten. He felt stupid when he took it, embarrassed that a third party
could see he had it on his phone, but he did it for Taeyong.

“I know it’s an old thing,” Ten explains. “But it’s nostalgic, right? Having a physical copy of a
picture of someone special.”

It isn’t common for people to print pictures, but Ten found a website where he could place the
order and have it delivered to his house.

“I love it,” Taeyong says, still looking at the photo. “I’ll keep it with me always.”

Ten smiles. Taeyong puts the picture on his bedside table and goes back, pulling Ten close, kissing
his lips. Ten sighs, happy being in his boyfriend’s arms. They stay like that, enjoying each other,
chatting casually as the hours pass.

Taeyong’s hand explores under Ten’s t-shirt, fingers on the small of his back. Ten sighs content
and kisses him languidly. Lips part, tongues meet. What starts tame becomes deep. Ten whimpers
as Taeyong rubs his nipple.

Ten pushes Taeyong against the bed and straddles him. They lock eyes while Ten zips down his
boyfriend’s pants. Ten stops. Taeyong nods. Ten takes Taeyong’s hard cock into his hand. He
pumps it slowly up and down, paying attention to Taeyong’s reaction, the way he kneads his palms
on Ten’s thighs almost painfully.

“I missed your touch,” Taeyong says in a trembling rasp.

Ten smiles. “I missed touching you.”

Ten slides down prone on the mattress and mouths Taeyong’s erection. Licks and drags his lips
until Taeyong is spilling sweet quiet moans. Then he swallows it, bobbing his head. He goes as far
as he can. Taeyong’s fingers comb through his black hair. Ten speeds up.

Soon Taeyong shudders as hot liquid falls on Ten’s tongue. He drinks it and moves away, wiping
his lips. Taeyong stares at him as he puts his dick inside his underwear. He grabs Ten by the arm,
putting him against the bed and climbing in between his legs. Taeyong kisses and nibbles Ten’s
lips hard while he opens his pants. Then he grabs the waist band and snugs it down Ten’s legs
along with the briefs, leaving him naked below the waist. Ten’s breath hitches.

His cock rests against his belly, its head wet. Taeyong goes back on top of him, joining Ten’s wrists
together and pining them against the pillow over his head. They kiss again, breathless, as Taeyong
holds him down. He plays with Ten’s nipple and waist, who produces muffled whines.

Taeyong stops the kiss to peer at Ten, gray on dark brown. His palm closes on Ten’s cock.
“Tell me when you’re about to cum.”

Then he starts moving, showering Ten’s skin with kisses. Ten tries to keep his noises to a
minimum, but he’s glad the house is big, anyway.

Ten is shaking, pleasure bubbling up inside him, when he says, “So close.”

Taeyong stops. Ten looks at him, confused. Taeyong’s gray eyes are mesmerizing, intense like
storms. He brings his free hand to Ten’s mouth, fingertips lining the seam of the lips. Ten playfully
licks them. Taeyong pushes the index and middle digit inside, dragging it gently on Ten’s tongue.
He feels his body clench and relax with arousal as he sucks Taeyong’s fingers, his boyfriend
watching him with half-lidded eyes.

Taeyong moves his fingers out of Ten’s mouth and down in between his legs. Ten is surprised
when Taeyong touches his rim, but he isn’t scared.

“Want you to cum on my fingers,” he murmurs, making Ten lose his air.

Ten nods enthusiastically. Taeyong kisses him, massaging his entrance slowly.

“I’m gonna make you feel so good.”

Taeyong’s hoarse voice sends goosebumps through Ten, who flutters his eyes shut, relaxing under
the touch. Taeyong slides one finger in. It doesn’t hurt and isn’t uncomfortable at all. Taeyong’s
practiced hands know what to do, because soon he’s rubbing a sensitive spot inside Ten that makes
him whimper and shake.

“Taeyong…”

He fucks him with his finger, gives him kisses all over his face, while Ten tries to keep his moans
contained.

“You’re so beautiful like this,” Taeyong whispers. “Opening up for me.”

Ten whines. Taeyong adds a second finger. The light stretch feels good on Ten’s hole, like he’s
being perfectly filled. Taeyong ups the pace and smoothers down Ten’s sounds with his mouth.

The pleasure escalates until Ten is brimming with it, desperate for release. A couple more strokes
take him there and he spills over his belly. The orgasm is long and intense, the best he ever had,
and he needs all his willpower not to scream.

When it’s over, Taeyong kisses and dots him for a while, before getting up to go to the bathroom.
With eyes closed, Ten hears the water running, then Taeyong comes back with tissues for Ten’s
spunked belly. He cleans him and helps Ten put his clothes back on. They cradle each other in bed.
Taeyong kisses the tip of Ten’s nose.

“I loved it,” Ten says.

“And I love pleasing you.”

Ten chuckles.

They stay in bed a little longer, enjoying the afterglow.

“I have something I want to show you,” Taeyong says.

“Okay.”

They put on their shoes and leave for another part of the house, that eventually leads to the back of
the gardens. The scenery shows a vast field of green with a mountainous backdrop. Ten takes this
in as they stroll under the summer sun. When they are far from the house, Taeyong stops, puts his
thumb and index in between his lips and whistles.

Ten frowns. “What are you doing?”

“Wait for it,” Taeyong smiles.

Suddenly Ten hears the rhythmic sound of something hitting the ground. He searches around and
sees it. A tall black stallion is coming towards them. His mane is lustrous, his coat is smooth. He’s
perfect, one of the most beautiful animals he’s ever seen. He stops beside Taeyong, who rubs his
snout.

“Ada, boy. Ten, this is Sig.”

“Wow. Taeyong. He’s incredible.”

“My mother gifted me at my thirteenth birthday, when Sig was two years old,” Taeyong explains.
“He’s been by my side ever since. Wanna ride?”

“I—” Ten flusters as Taeyong smiles at him. “I’m gonna fall or something.”

“I will never let you fall. He’s docile and domesticated. Plus, he knows I trust you, so he trusts you,
too.”

“How do you know that?” Ten asks.

“Just like you know things about your cats. Years of experience.”

“Okay. Help me.”

Taeyong clutches Ten’s waist, who steps on the stirrup. Ten holds onto the saddle and Taeyong
helps him up. Ten throws his leg on the other side and looks down at the grass, feeling far away
from it. Taeyong easily takes the spot behind Ten and grabs the reins. Sig starts walking, his speed
increasing slowly until they reach a trot. Ten enjoys the wind on his face. After a while, they reach
a stable.

Taeyong dismounts and helps Ten down. He ties Sig’s reins on a bar and pulls Ten inside. The
place looks abandoned, no animals housed here. Taeyong leads him to a horse stall that’s different
from what you’d expect. The ground is covered with rugs, there are pillows, a couple bottles of
liquor, and books—real books, not a tablet.

“This is where I come to hide sometimes,” Taeyong explains. “When I need to get away.”

They sit down, side by side, against the cushions.

“I like it,” Ten says. “In the middle of nature.”

They stare at each other.

“I love you,” Ten whispers. “Thank you for inviting me to your home.”

“I’m glad you came.” Taeyong kisses his cheek. “I love you more.”
 They hang out until the sun starts to set. They ride back to the manor and a servant takes Sig to the
current stables. They watch the sun setting together, sitting on the back porch, blue fading away,
giving way to orange and pink. After, Ten bids goodbye to Eunji and Taeyong takes him to the
entrance.

They trade a sweet kiss before Ten gets in the car to leave. They’ll only see each other in
December. But that’s okay, because they’ll keep each other in their hearts.

As Ten is driven away, he feels complete. He wonders how many times in life do people get a
chance to love and be loved like this.

Chapter End Notes

 if i didn’t know better, i’d think you were still around
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Taeyong isn’t expecting to be summoned by the butler to his father’s office one night, close before
his departure to Peitharchía. He tidies his hair as he walks the halls of his home until the study. As
he steps inside, he sees his father sitting with his back to him.

“Close the door,” Seojun commands.

Taeyong complies and stands with his hands behind his back, straight as an arrow. Seojun turns, a
glass of whisky in his hand.

“I want you to pack your things tonight, because tomorrow you’ll be heading out.”

Taeyong gulps, trying to come up with words. “My things?”

“You are leaving the Capital.” Seojun’s face is a blank mask, like always. The only thing Taeyong
ever sees in him is disdain.

“But I start at the Institute in a week…” Taeyong starts to reason.

“I’ve rescinded your application. You are not attending Peitharchía.”

Seojun’s stare on him is unbothered, cold, loathing. Taeyong’s muscles tense and he fights his
hardest not to show it, not to bare the signs of his distress.

“Why?”

“I have other plans for you. You’ll know the details when you get there.”

“Father, I want—”

“What you want is irrelevant. You’ll do what is told of you,” Seojun interjects. “And if you don’t,
you will face the consequences.”

Taeyong quiets. He has a trust fund, he can pay his own way through the Institute. He doesn’t need
his father’s help.

“Before you decide to make a fool out of yourself, think back to Jongdae and Jimin.”

This gives Taeyong pause, panic rising in his gut. Ten’s parents. How does his father know about
them?

“Yes. You think I wouldn’t vet who dates my only son?” Seojun snorts. “How stupid do you think
I am? As stupid as you, who decided it was a good idea to fraternize with a low-class citizen who
wants nothing but your money and status?”

Taeyong’s face catches on fire.

“Don’t talk about Ten like that,” he snaps.

Seojun is unaffected by Taeyong’s tone. “You’ll do as I say, or your whore’s parents will suffer the
consequences. They will be jobless, unable to find work in this country, destined for the streets and
starvation. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” Taeyong murmurs through his teeth.

“Speak up. Do you understand?”

“Yes, sir,” he says louder, against every fiber of his being.

“Then we are done here. Your car leaves tomorrow at six.”

Seojun dismisses him with a hand, and Taeyong leaves as quickly as he can. He goes back to his
room, trying not to run, trying to keep his emotions in check. When he is finally in the privacy of
his room, he covers his face with his trembling hands.

He has no choice. If he needs to give up his future for whatever his father wants of him, to protect
Ten and his family, he will. He will sacrifice himself for them.

Next morning before dawn, Taeyong grabs a trekking bag with essentials. His hand terminal, Ten’s
photograph, a couple pieces of clothing, for warm and cold weather. He doesn’t know where he’s
going, and his father doesn’t inform him. His mother was already sleeping the night before and still
is now, so he can’t say goodbye to her.

The car is waiting for him outside. He boards and they leave.

They drive for hours.

Cities give way to wilderness, vast fields, and snow-covered mountains in the distance. Taeyong
naps throughout the drive.

They stop suddenly, in the middle of nowhere.

“This is it, Mr. Lee,” says the driver.

Taeyong is confused, looks at him and around. There is literally nothing there but nature.

“Are you sure?” he asks.

The driver rechecks the GPS on his phone that’s attached to the panel of the car.

“Yes, sir, this is it. You’re supposed to wait here for transport.”

“Okay. Thank you.”

He exits. The driver leaves.

Taeyong just stands there under the sun, utterly confused. He exhales loudly.

Time goes by. He sits on the side of the road, waiting.

Suddenly, a truck appears. It slows down until it stops beside Taeyong. Three men dressed in black
step out. One of them stands in front of Taeyong, the other two flank him. They all have short hair.

“Lee Taeyong?” the one in front of him asks.

“Yes.”
He takes a phone from his pocket and offers it to Taeyong. “Fingerprint.”

Taeyong places his thumb on it, and it gets scanned. When it blinks a green light indicating
positive, the man nods.

A black bag is shoved on top of Taeyong’s head. Before he can struggle, his hands are being tied
behind his back forcefully. He tries to fight it, but they drag him into the truck and drive away.

The Academy feels different knowing Taeyong won’t be there. That Ten won’t see him in the
cantina, or join him at the library, or have his steady presence in firearms class. There won’t be
sharing a bed together, walking the gardens, stargazing. But Jaehyun is at Ten’s side as always, and
having his best friend makes Ten happy.

Right as he arrives, he receives notice that he’s been selected to be the teacher’s assistant of the
firearms course. Just like Taeyong in the year before, Ten will have his own room. Jaehyun is
offered a position as a Strategy teacher’s assistant.

“This year will be great,” Jaehyun says as they lounge in Ten’s bed together. “I have a feeling.”

Ten chuckles. “I hope you’re right.”

“I miss Doyoung,” Jaehyun sighs.

“I know. I miss Taeyong,” Ten says. “But they are at the Institute, probably doing amazing. It will
be a good year for all of us. And come winter break, they’ll come visit us in Delphi.”

“Yes, they will. How did we get so lucky?” Jaehyun smiles.

“I don’t know.”

Ten doesn’t. He’s so grateful for his life here in Corinth, meeting Jaehyun when he was younger,
thriving at the Academy, finding Taeyong despite the odds. He intertwines his hand with
Jaehyun’s.

Everything is as usual, the course load heavier, the subjects harder. Ten appreciates how it keeps
him busy. No time to dwell on the longing he feels for Taeyong, to be in his arms again, to have his
lips on his mouth and hands on his skin.

Ten is walking back to his room alone after some hours at the shooting range, when someone calls
him.

“Lee.” It’s a voice he doesn’t recognize.

He spins on his heels to find Sejin there. Ten immediately stills. She takes a step towards him and
instinctively he takes a step back. The memories of getting beaten in the bathroom years ago flood
his mind. The pain, the humiliation, the helplessness. But no, Ten will not let Sejin intimidate him.
He’ll protect himself if he has to, even if she’s a woman. His fists close tightly.

“I just want to say something,” she says.

“What?”
“I’m sorry.”

Ten is shocked by this. He frowns lightly, analyzing her features. Sejin looks remorseful. Maybe
she’s faking it.

“I mean that. I shouldn’t have done that to you,” she continues. “It was stupid and unfair. You
didn’t deserve it. And you never ratted us out, which I’m thankful for.”

“O…kay,” Ten sounds out. He relaxes a bit, fists uncurling.

“I know you don’t want to be friends, but know that I admire you,” Sejin says. “Everyone in our
year does. We all see how well you do in class. You’ll make a great teacher’s assistant.”

“T-thank you.” Ten is actually touched by this, blushing a bit with the idea that others notice him.

Sejin gives him a small smile and nods. “Goodnight, Lee.”

She leaves.

“Hm. Sejin apologized.”

Ten and Jaehyun are sitting at the cantina, having breakfast.

Jaehyun raises his brows. “Really?”

Their eyes search for the girl in the crowd of students. She’s a couple of tables away, eating alone.

“She said everyone in our class admires me,” Ten says awkwardly. “How weird is that?”

“Why is it weird? You’re amazing, Ten.” Jaehyun messes Ten’s hair affectionately.

“I just think it’s a strange thing to tell someone.” Ten shrugs.

Jaehyun giggles. “I think it’s well earned.”

“You’re too nice. Stop it.”

Jaehyun pinches Ten’s cheek and they go back to their meal.

Taeyong doesn’t know how much time passes as he’s taken in the truck. He can only hear the
engine running. He spaces out, unable to process what he’s feeling. Not fear, not despair, not
curiosity. He’s too stunned by the developments to react properly. It feels like he’s watching a
movie of this happening to someone else, not him.

Eventually they stop.

Someone drags him out of the vehicle, and after walking blindly for a while he’s put on his knees.
Now, there is nothing but silence. Taeyong breathes heavily, trying to stay calm.

This can’t be a bad thing. Can it? His father wouldn’t send him to his death. Taeyong is his only
 son, his blood, his chance to perpetuate their family. That is his father’s greatest wish. He wants to
leave the legacy of his wealth and influence to someone, otherwise it will all be for nothing. After
the car accident, Seojun suffered a trauma that prevents him from having other children, which
means Taeyong is his sole heir.

Taeyong sweated through his clothes on the way here and they feel uncomfortable now. The black
bag is finally snatched out of his head and the light is almost blinding. Taeyong blinks, adjusting
his eyes. When he can see clearly, he takes in his surroundings immediately.

He’s in the middle of nowhere. A one-story pale and paint-cracked building stands in front of him.
Around him, there is a line of other men—he counts twenty-nine—kneeling just like him, their
respective backpacks behind each of them. There are others standing, dressed in black, most in
what resembles a military uniform, carrying automatic rifles. One of them, with a black baseball
cap, is lighting a cigarette right across from Taeyong. He takes a long drag and puffs the smoke
out.

“Your training starts today,” he says. “There is no room for doubt or faltering now. There is no
such thing as failure.”

Taeyong has no idea what is happening. He imagines if he speaks up he’ll get scolded, probably
worse.

“You’ll become elite soldiers. This country needs you,” he continues the speech, flicking cigarette
ash on the ground as he paces around. “Don’t question your superiors, or you will know what hell
tastes like. Do as you’re told at all times.”

He stops, looking over at them.

“Welcome to the Red Stain.”

Chapter End Notes

hell has broken loose

dying to know your thoughts on this turn of events

 i should’ve asked you questions, i should’ve asked you how to be
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Taeyong wakes under screaming. Already in the black uniform they provided him, boots on, he
gets up and stands straight by the bed, with the other men that share the dorm.

“Form a line! And out!” a superior yells.

“YES, SIR.” All chant.

They obey. The ones that had no boots on don’t get a chance to put them. A mistake, because they
have been awakened randomly in the middle of the night for the past days. They step outside on
the dirt ground. It’s dark. On the patio of the small complex, composed of a couple of one-story
structures, the group of men gather. They are ordered to run in a circle around the buildings, while
chanting the Corinth national anthem. Then, they perform conditioning exercises.

Time has passed in a haze, as Taeyong could barely sleep or eat or shower.

Taeyong literally has no time to think. He hasn’t really processed what happened to him.

Somehow, his father sent him to train under the Red Stain, the extremist neofascist group. Taeyong
knows his father hates refugees and immigrants—and there is a reason behind his hatred—but
making Taeyong join terrorists is a drastic move on his part. What does he expect of his son? For
Taeyong to become a criminal? Apparently so.

The training gets worse as days unfold. Whoever complies orders with a hint of unwillingness gets
shouted at or slapped in the face. They start sparing hand to hand, and if they go easy on their
peers, they get punished too. Their superiors often yell offensive slurs about foreigners, and they
have to chant along.

Going through sleep deprivation, exhaustion, thirst, and starvation turns Taeyong into a raw mess
of a person. Still, he thinks about Ten. When his body aches, when his bruises bleed, when his
stomach growls and all he craves is a drop of water, he thinks about Ten. He remembers his
gorgeous face, the way he smiles, his pitch-black hair, the shape of his body. He remembers his
laugh, how Ten holds a gun in his hands, his fingers typing on the study tablet.

His memories of Ten are all he has in the barren wasteland, the only thing to keep him warm.

He longs for the moment they can be together, wishes for it, craves it, clings to it with every cell in
his body. He needs to make through whatever is happening to him so he can get back to Ten. And
maybe, when he returns, he can plan how to escape this absurd situation his father put him in.
Maybe talk to his mother, make her reason with him. His phone was taken away from him day one
so he can’t contact the outside world. He has to bid his time.

“There you go. Good job, Park.”

“Thank you, Lee,” the second-year student, who just made an excellent shot, smiles at him.

Ten walks away, observing the students in class. Others ask for help and instructions, and Ten is
happy to help. He finds he likes this type of job very much.

After, he heads to the cafeteria where he finds Jaehyun.

“So, I asked around,” Jaehyun says as they stand in line to get their food.

“About?”

“You.”

“What?”

Jaehyun nods. “Apparently our classmates call you Sharpshooter.”

Ten can feel his face redden immediately. Jaehyun chuckles.

“That’s a good thing, Tennie.”

Ten ponders. Even though he feels embarrassed to be noticed, he likes that his fame is solely based
on a skill and nothing else. Not wealth or influence or his nationality.

This gives Ten a newfound confidence. He gets more comfortable in his skin, allows himself to
recognize his own talents. Taeyong always praised him, but Ten thought it was because his
boyfriend loved him, so of course he would do that. But to have strangers spotting Ten’s abilities
means it’s not just Taeyong’s biased vision of him.

Whenever he can squeeze the time, Ten goes to the central office to sit at the terminals to access
his mail. It’s the only place where students can write to the outside world or read the news.

One night, there is a message from Taeyong. Ten’s pulse picks up.

Dear Ten,

Things have been hectic. I’m sorry I can’t write to you often.

We’ll talk later.

Love,

Taeyong.

Ten smiles from ear to ear.

Dear Taeyong,

Please focus on your studies. You don’t need to worry about me.

Third year is kicking my ass.

Can’t wait to see you.

Love,
Ten.

He replies quickly and cracks his fingers, sighing. It’s good to hear from Taeyong, even if it’s a
short message. He must be working so hard at the Institute. Ten is proud of him. He is eager to
hear all about it when they finally meet.

Maybe it is silly, but what frightens Taeyong the most isn’t the starvation, the pain from training,
the punches to his gut and face that leave him coughing up blood and swollen. He’s scared others
will find out the photograph of Ten he keeps in the bottom of his backpack. He’s scared his
superiors will hear of it and take it away from him. It’s become his greatest treasure, something so
small and yet so precious. If he knew where he was going to, he wouldn’t have brought it along,
but now it is too late.

Whenever he looks at it, he pretends he’s searching for something. He doesn’t take it out of the
bag, just glances at it quickly and hides it in a pair of folded clean socks again. Seeing Ten gives
him comfort. Taeyong thinks back to the day he got the ring tabs with Ten’s initials, and how he
keeps them until now, inside the drawer of his bedside table back in his home. What a silly game,
which gave him the greatest prize.

He loves Ten so fucking much.

They will be together again.

When Taeyong thinks things can’t get any worse, they do.

One night, two soldiers pull him from his bed and drag him into a dark small room, the only light
coming from the corridor. It smells of rot. The air is damp.

“Strip.” The order is clear.

Taeyong hurriedly works on the buttons of his shirt.

“I said, strip, soldier,” he repeats louder.

“Yes, sir!” Taeyong answers with rehearsed enthusiasm.

He’s out of all his clothes and boots in less than a minute.

“Fold them properly and hand them to me,” the man says. Taeyong complies.

Taeyong waits. A second ticks. That’s when it comes. A hit in the face with what can only be the
rear of an assault rifle, hard and cold, cracking the bone of his cheek. He falls to ground, hands
flying over his head and curling up on his side immediately to protect himself out of instinct. The
beating continues, this time with a baton. Taeyong grunts and howls with each blow splitting his
muscles. After the pain becomes too much to bear, he dissociates completely, and it’s like he’s not
even present anymore.

When it’s done, they leave him in the dark, in the moist dirty ground, as he tries to breathe through
the soreness in his ribs.
 He doesn’t know how long he stays there, healing slowly from the bruises. Hours, days. No food,
no water, no light, no warmth.

He’s sleeping when they come back, turning on the light, bringing a chair, and making Taeyong sit
on it. They tie his wrists behind his back. Taeyong can barely open his eyes.

What follows are hours of interrogation and threats of violence, sometimes mutters sometimes
shouts, against Taeyong and everyone is his life. They claim they’ll kill Taeyong’s mother if he
doesn’t answer the questions they pose. It’s mock interrogation, Taeyong concludes, and he’s
supposed to hold out as long as he can.

Eventually, he’s taken to the shower where he scrubs the dry blood from his skin, is given back his
uniform, and finally can have a meal and a glass of water. Even after all the time in captivity, his
cheekbone still hasn’t healed fully. He suspects there isn’t a medic on the premises because no one
cares to examine him.

As the weather grows colder, they are given heavy coats, gloves, and hats, but the climate is still
harsh and there is no heating in the room they sleep.

One day, they are taken near a river and ordered to strip. They are made to get into the freezing
water until it hits their shoulders and stay there for eight minutes. Taeyong’s balls have never
shrunk so much into his body.

Every few days they are subjected to mock capture and resistance training where they need to
evade pursue.

But among the grueling conditions, the soldiers there also have team-building exercises, like
capture the flag. It feels almost stupid to do what can be called a children’s game. They also carry
wooden poles over their heads through rough and uneven terrain. Taeyong can notice how the men
bond with time, and he somewhat understands, because of the sheer trauma they are put through
together. Still, he keeps to himself, knowing these people are probably here because they want to.

As Corinthians, they all already have the basic military training from the Academy, which is
comprehensive. So they start doing simulated operations, divided into groups of five, and practice
skills like reconnaissance, stealth, tactical coordination, and communication. They use the
buildings of the training complex for this. Their superiors sometimes serve as ‘opponents’. For this
they use airsoft guns. They must team up and develop plans of action to the challenges proposed by
their superiors, in sabotages, assassinations, invasion and control of a room, explosive placing, etc.

Taeyong can recognize the changes his body goes through. He has trained in martial arts and
firearms since he was a child, he’s done three years in the Academy. But now his pain tolerance,
both physical and emotional, increased significantly. His senses are sharper, he’s lighter at his feet,
he’s easily aware of his surroundings and can predict his teammates’ movements when they play.

He’s being beaten down and shaped into something new. A specialized, highly trained soldier.

Chapter End Notes

i believe this is the most brutal scene of the fic so if you made it through, take a deep
breath
honestly nervous to post this and the next two chapters where all the shit goes down

anyway feel free to curse in the comments!

 over and over lost again with no surprises, disappointments, close your eyes
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

December comes and Taeyong is dumped back at the spot where the Red Stain first picked him
up. His driver appears shortly after. Because of the car’s heating, he falls asleep all the way back
home. He hasn’t felt this warm and comfortable since summer.

When Taeyong arrives home, his mother is waiting for him.

“Darling! How was your semester in Peitharchía?” Eunji asks excitedly. Then she really looks at
him. “You seem so tired. Have you lost weight?”

“Taeyong worked hard.” His father shows up. “The Institute is no easy feat. Come with me, son,
we must talk at the office.”

Taeyong kisses his mother’s cheek and gives her a hug before trailing after his father. He is tired,
but ready to confront him. He needs to stand up to him and the madness he put Taeyong through.
This isn’t normal.

The fireplace is burning, and Seojun sits on an armchair by it. Taeyong closes the door of the study
and turns to him.

“Were you just not going to tell me you intended to throw me into a den of crazy terrorists?”
Taeyong quickly says, finally airing his bottled frustrations. “What did you think was gonna
happen? That they would convert me? They didn’t. I am not insane.”

“What you believe in doesn’t matter,” Seojun puts simply, folding his hands over his knee. “You’ll
fight for the Red Stain.”

“Why? They are criminals.”

“Because they are right,” his father explains. “Our government is too set in its ways. For years I
have lobbied for border restriction and deportation of criminal foreigners. Stricter punishments.
But it was to no avail. So I changed my game plan.”

“You… You created the Red Stain?”

“No. They were there. Young men lost and unable to express their rage. So I shaped them. I gave
them funds, food, weapons, equipment. I hired people to train them. And now you’re one of them.”

Taeyong shakes his head. “I will not be complicit in this madness.”

“You don’t have a choice,” Seojun says. “Which brings me to the next subject. Your… whore.”

Taeyong’s gut freezes.

“You think I didn’t know about his true nationality? That he is a disgusting Dawi?”

Before Taeyong can stop himself, he advances towards his father, grabbing his collar and raising
his fist. “Keep his name out of your mouth,” he barks.

Seojun holds his indifferent expression. “You can hit me. You can kill me. It changes nothing
about your situation.”

Taeyong is shaking, his breath harsh. His hand releases the piece of fabric, and he leans back.

His father continues. “Tell me something. How could you?”

Taeyong can’t answer, he’s choking on air, his face is blazing from humiliation.

“How could you disrespect your sister’s memory?” his father asks slowly. “After she was killed by
a drunk immigrant?”

Taeyong’s eyes burn with tears, but he swallows it down.

“I won’t allow this relationship to continue. You will break up with him at once.”

“No.” Desperate, Taeyong drops to his knees and bows down his head. “Please. I’ll do anything.”

“Be glad that I need him alive, so you’ll do as you’re told. Otherwise he’d be dead already,” Seojun
explains offhandedly. “You’ll break up with him via message…”

“No, please. Let me see him. Just one more time,” Taeyong begs as he shakes. Tears are flowing
freely down his face now. He can’t hold back anymore.

Seojun hums. “Alright. Because you are my son and I am not a monster, I’ll allow you to meet him
one last time. You’ll wear a wire so we can know what you’re saying, so don’t try to tell him the
truth about the Red Stain. After, you’ll behave and marry the woman I pick. You’ll fight for the
Red Stain, and when the time comes, you’ll marry and perform your duties to sire an heir. And
you’ll do this willingly. Because you owe it to me. To your family. To your sister. Do you
understand?

“Yes.” Taeyong’s voice is barely there, torn and destroyed like all of him. How could Seojun use
the memory of his daughter to manipulate his only son? It makes Taeyong sick to his stomach.

But Seojun continues. “If you go to the authorities, we’ll know. And you have no way to prove
anything. Even if they look into it, they can’t link me to the Red Stain. You’ll be kept under our
thumb. You’ll be watched until you are deemed trustworthy. Don’t think about contacting or
fraternizing with your whore. If you step out of line, we’ll capture him. We won’t kill him, just
make you watch while—”

“Alright!” Taeyong interrupts in a yell because he can’t bear to listen to the threat that was coming.
“I will do whatever you say as long as you don’t get near him.”

Taeyong glares at his father finally, his gray eyes the most tormented they have ever been, red and
damp, his lips twisted in a frown, unable to hide all the hatred he feels for him. If he knew he could
get away with it, he would strangle him right now. Watching his son in this state doesn’t seem to
affect Seojun one bit.

“If you ever hurt him, I will kill myself,” Taeyong mutters. This is the only stalemate possible. If
Seojun wants heirs, if he needs him alive for it, then Taeyong will fight with the only move he has
—his blood. And maybe, maybe, Seojun has a shred of humanity left and doesn’t want his only son
gone.

“At least you’re brave enough for that,” Seojun actually commends him. “But we digress. There is
no need for that, my son, because I’m giving you the chance to prove yourself, and if you do, you’ll
be rewarded. A couple of years from now, when you’re married, and this country is cleansed, you
will be thankful for this.”

Seojun glances him up and down.

“But right now, you’re nothing but an embarrassment. So get out of my sight.”

He doesn’t need to hear twice. Taeyong dashes out of the study and soon he’s running to his
bedroom. He feels like a scolded child, not a twenty-one-year-old man who just went through
months of harsh military training. Somehow this moment, when he realizes he has to give up Ten,
is worse than all the bruises he received before.

It’s true. The person who hit the Lee family’s car and killed Taeyong’s sister was an immigrant.
An immigrant who drank on the job as a driver for an upper-class family. But the crux of the
problem was alcohol abuse, not nationality. That’s how Taeyong has always seen this. Drinking
and driving is irresponsible, dangerous, and wrong. Unfortunately, his father’s hatred spun out of
control, and only now Taeyong can see how far it has come. He’s gone crazy.

And Taeyong is the captive of his madness. He’s trapped, no way out. It’s Taeyong’s fault that Ten
is trapped in this, too. The thought of losing Ten demolishes Taeyong into a sobbing mess as he
slides down to the ground, leaning on his shut door. His sorrow overtakes him, hiccups filling the
silence of the room, tears flowing from his eyes.

After he’s wailed until his sinus hurt, Taeyong calms down a bit, but he still cries silently.

He needs to break up with Ten. He needs to protect him at all costs. Even if it shatters Taeyong’s
heart forever, Ten will be safer that way. He’ll be unharmed, and alive. And Taeyong will choose a
world with Ten in it, because without him, it’s too cold to bear.

Taeyong drags himself into his bed. His tears just keep coming until he falls asleep.

They schedule to meet in Delphi on a Saturday. Taeyong books a room in a small hotel there, so
they can have privacy for the worst moment of their relationship. He still doesn’t know how he’ll
survive this, but he needs to go through with it. He forces himself to focus on the dire alternative,
on his father’s threats.

The wind is biting when Taeyong exits the car and makes his way inside the building. The wire
he’s using is attached to his sternum, undetectable. He gets the keycard in the reception and goes
up in the elevator. When he opens the door to the room, he sees Ten is already there. His heart
beats faster as his boyfriend turns and opens a big smile.

“Taeyong!” Ten rushes into his arms.

Taeyong embraces him back tightly, almost crushing, inhaling the scent of the Academy shampoo
that’s so familiar and comforting. Taeyong squeezes his eyes shut and just lets the moment carry
him away. He wants to forget the pain for just a minute, he just needs a minute with the love of his
life.

Ten moves to kiss him and Taeyong welcomes it with parted lips, their tongues meeting. It
escalates quickly to full-blown force, Taeyong’s palms digging all over Ten’s flesh over the
clothes. He pushes him inside the room, against a desk. It’s the sweetest violence Taeyong has ever
endured. Ten reciprocates with equal want, clutching Taeyong’s hair. Taeyong presses their bodies
together.
“T-Taeyong, are you crying?” Ten halts the kiss to say.

He is. His cheeks are wet, and he didn’t even realize. Taeyong panics and grabs Ten, turning him
around. He holds him there by the arms, still, hiding his face on Ten’s nape. Ten tries to move but
Taeyong locks him in place easily.

“Taeyong…”

He kisses the curve of Ten’s neck. I love you. I love you. I love you.

He can hear Ten exhaling harshly. Taeyong knows both their cocks are hard with desire, aching to
be touched. He wants to rip through Ten’s clothes and take him right there, transform them into
one flame. And he suspects Ten wants this too. But he can’t. That would only hurt them more. It’s
best that they don’t know how fucking that way is like, so they don’t miss it.

“I have something to say,” Taeyong finally speaks in a hoarse voice.

“Can I just—” Ten tries to turn again, but Taeyong doesn’t let him.

“Just—If I see your face I won’t be able to say it.”

Ten relaxes. “Okay. I’m here. Tell me.”

Taeyong breathes hard. This is it. He has to actually produce the damned the words. He can do it.
He can do it. His mouth hangs open as he tries to articulate himself.

“We have to break up.”

Immediately Ten tenses up.

“Are you serious?” Ten asks weakly.

“Yes.”

Now Ten struggles against him harder, but Taeyong doesn’t want him to move. Because if he
moves, if they look at each other, it will be too real. Can he even go through with it if he looks Ten
in the eye?

“Taeyong—” Ten complains.

He finally lets up and Ten turns around. His face is pure confusion and hurt.

“Why? What happened?”

Taeyong cages him against the desk, hiding his face under Ten’s chin. He takes a deep breath.

“I—I have duties to fulfill,” Taeyong says. It’s true. “I can’t be with you because of them. I’m
sorry.”

Ten cups his cheeks and makes Taeyong face him. “Then why are you crying?”

He is. Again. Taeyong takes Ten’s face between his hands. “Because it doesn’t mean that I don’t
love you. It just means we can’t be together. And it’s not fair to you. You deserve everything.
You’ll find someone better. I promise.”

Ten’s eyes are watering. “I don’t want someone else. I want you.”
This is killing Taeyong. He’s not gonna make it.

“Don’t make it harder than it has to be,” he begs. “There are things keeping us apart, and I’m
powerless to stop them.”

“What things? Just talk to me, please,” Ten whimpers.

Taeyong grabs Ten’s wrists and pushes them down. “I can’t marry you. There are certain standards
that I have to achieve. You’re not upper class. I could keep you as a lover, but it’s not fair to you.”
A mixture of lies and truths.

Tears stream down Ten’s face. “If you knew this, then why did you pursue me in the first place?”

“I thought I could change my father’s mind, but he didn’t allow it. He will make our lives hell.”

Ten sniffles. “I don’t care. I could find a million reasons for us to not be together, but I don’t care.”

He leans in and kisses Taeyong. His lips wet and salty from the tears. Taeyong surrenders, he can’t
resist him. He kisses him deeply. He’s never felt this much desire for Ten, mixed with despair,
pain, and confusion. Taeyong puts him on the table and presses their bodies together, hands
searching Ten’s skin under the clothes, kneading the flesh. He needs him. Ten is the air he needs to
survive, he’s the balm to all his wounds, he’s the right to all the wrongs.

But the contrasting images invade his mind. From warm to cold. From flushed to pale.

Ten, bloodied and battered—or worse.

Taeyong falters and turns away as he tries to control his sobs. He moves across the room to the
door, leaning his hand on it, the other over his eyes. He is trembling. Ten hugs him from behind.

“We can’t do it,” Taeyong says.

“Taeyong, please…”

Taeyong turns around and snatches Ten’s wrists tightly, looking into his eyes.

“Promise me you’ll get over me. Promise me you’ll be happy.”

“I—”

“Promise me, please. I am fucking begging you.”

Ten cries, his whole face twisted in pain. He shakes his head. “Stop.”

“Please, Ten. You’ll do better. You’ll be great. You don’t need me.”

“But I want you,” Ten protests.

Taeyong cups Ten’s face. “I won’t ever forget you. But I have to let you go.”

He kisses Ten’s lips one more time. Then he releases him. He takes one long last look at Ten, the
most perfect human being in the world, gathers all his courage, and walks out the door. He dashes
through the corridors, feeling hot tears taint his cheeks. The car is still waiting for him when he
exits the building. When the car accelerates, he falls apart.
Chapter End Notes

i cried writing this

well now it's the aftermath - how they will deal with this. and more importantly, how
they will get back together
 i am never gonna love again
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten is shaking and crying as he knocks on Jaehyun’s door. He ran all the way back to the
Academy, and he’s panting. Jaehyun opens the door and immediately panics.

“Ten, what happened?” He pulls him inside and shuts the door.

“T-Taeyong broke up with me,” he stutters through his cries.

Jaehyun pulls him into an embrace, cupping the back of his head. They stay like that as Ten weeps.
He lets it all pour out. The comfort of his best friend’s hug placates some of Ten’s pain.

“It’s okay, Tennie. I’m here.”

Ten wants to say something, wants to tell Jaehyun what happened, but he’s too overwhelmed for
that. He’s incoherent with pain, just hiccupping, his eyes blurred by the tears, his nose running. He
wishes he could dissolve right now and end this moment—the aftermath of his heartache. Ten
really allowed himself to dream of a future with Taeyong, only for it was ripped away from him.

Jaehyun eventually guides Ten into bed and he ends up falling asleep. The next day, Ten explains
what Taeyong has told him and Jaehyun tries to be supportive and understanding, but he clearly
looks pissed. There are things Ten can’t admit out loud still, that hurt too much, and Jaehyun
doesn’t press him to talk more than he wants.

Days pass in a haze. Jaehyun is around, though, offering comfort and company whenever Ten
needs. When Ten can’t stand the emptiness of his room at night, unable to fall asleep, the ache of
Taeyong’s absence burning holes into his bones, he escapes to Jaehyun’s bed, and his friend holds
him so slumber can finally overwhelm him.

Ten has things to focus on. This is his last year in the Academy, the decisive year that will either
make or break his career. His heart has been shattered and he can’t mourn the loss of Taeyong. He
has no time for it. He needs to excel, otherwise he’ll lose what he’s been building, his track record,
his skills, his chance at Peitharchía. If he fails, he won’t get the grant. He can take student loans,
but they mean a lifetime of debt. The Institute is too expensive, much more than a regular
university, which would also require loans, although less costly. Ten needs to think about his
future, his parents’ future. He needs to do what he promised and buy them a home, take care of
them like they took care of him. It’s his turn to step up.

So Ten pushes his hurt down. He puts Taeyong and the memories they shared in the back of his
head. He gets up every morning, he attends class, he practices, he gives it his all. He’ll deal with
the sorrow later.

Month after month, Ten keeps walking. He won’t give up, won’t surrender. He has Jaehyun at his
side, holding his hand, and that’s enough.

When the final exams come and pass, and the results of the top five third-year students are posted
on the bulletin board, Ten cuts through the crowd with Jaehyun at his side. His gut is churning, his
pulse is erratic. He’s so afraid, but he needs to be brave. He takes a deep breath and looks up.
 1. Ten Lee
2. Jeong Jaehyun
3. Kim Yeri
4. Park Sejin
5. Park Sooyoung

All Ten can feel is the air entering and leaving his lungs.

Then he moves away from everyone and starts to run. He dashes through the corridors when a
wave of diverse emotions washes over him. He enters an empty classroom and paces around
nervously for a moment. Until he crumbles. Ten falls to his knees as sobs consume him, searing
tears pouring. He curls up into himself, forearms on the ground as he shakes. He’s shining with
warm happiness, so proud of what he accomplished. He did it. He made it to the Institute. But then
also comes the cold, the loneliness, the heartache. What Taeyong left behind.

Someone steps inside the room and Ten knows it’s Jaehyun. His friend kneels beside him, putting a
hand on Ten’s back, rubbing it up and down.

“He left,” Ten cries out. “He left.”

“Tennie…”

“He left me behind.” In this cold earth.

“I’m here.” Jaehyun leans over him, putting his arms around Ten’s torso.

That night, his last night at the Academy, Ten trails alone in the darkness to the spot where he and
Taeyong watched the sky that one time, the same spot where they touched each other intimately
for the first time. He lies down on the grass and looks up at the constellations that composed the
story Taeyong told him about, about the couple that couldn’t be together. How ironic that now Ten
and Taeyong actually can’t be together. Maybe they were doomed from the start. Maybe in real life
there aren’t magpies to build a bridge for them.

Ten touches his chest, and he can feel over the clothes the tangibility of the ring that hangs around
his neck. He couldn’t take it off. He never takes it off. He doesn’t know why he clings to it, like
the last link that joins him and Taeyong. Maybe one day he’ll be ready to remove it, but not now.

He gazes at the stars that once seemed so close as his eyes water.

“I miss you.”

After December, Taeyong goes back to training with the Red Stain. Not in that distant wasteland,
but in a hidden site in Syracuse, a city next to the Capital. There are deeper levels to it now, and
Taeyong’s skills are evaluated before it continues. The intent is to recognize and hone his ‘talents’
next, adding new things to his base set of skills. Taeyong is deemed highly intelligent, self-
disciplined, self-reliant, resourceful, calm even when exposed to dire and life-threatening
situations, a bulwark when it comes to interrogation.
But he’s also deemed a bad shot. Because he purposely taints his aim and sometimes misses,
letting them think he’s not good at it. This way, he won’t be put into an assault team and faced with
the pressure to kill an innocent person. His peers perform much better than him on this, eager to
please, and Taeyong’s training takes a different turn after that—building him into a covert
operative.

Later, he finds out the Red Stain was instructed by Seojun not to put him in missions deemed too
risky, with the possibility of being captured—he’ll mostly operate in the shadows. This doesn’t
stop them from molding Taeyong into the perfect soldier. Sometimes he wonders if his father puts
them up to this, if he and all of them are taking pleasure from aggressively curbing Taeyong
because he dated a refugee.

In the dark cell, Taeyong spits blood and a tooth flies out with it.

“I’m going to ask again. How did you meet him?”

He’s naked, covered in sweat and bruises. The pain is something dull in the back of his mind.
Mock interrogation happens occasionally in his training, and they usually want him to answer
things about his life. Like his relationship with Ten.

No matter how much they beat him, he doesn’t budge. It helps that he knows they can’t kill him or
damage too much.

When he’s not under the harsh conditions of this peculiar pedagogy, Taeyong thinks he’s
disappearing into thin air.

Summer comes, and he gets a break, goes back to his home. His mother remarks again on his
looks, on how battered he is. Taeyong hides the darkened spots with makeup. He books a dentist
appointment to replace the teeth he lost. He drinks bottle after bottle of vodka, and spends his days
in bed, drowning in old sorrows.

He dreams of Ten often. It makes him want to sleep all the time; it makes him want to not sleep at
all. Will it be better if he just forgets him? It’s been six months and Ten still occupies his mind. He
still remembers him clearly. He still keeps his photograph and the soda ring tabs on his bedside
drawer. He still feels the phantom presence of Ten’s skin under his palm, so smooth, so warm. Like
basking under a sun.

Doyoung’s messages piled up throughout the months. They haven’t spoken to each other since
Taeyong was thrust into his Red Stain training. By the texts Doyoung sent, which Taeyong never
responded to, his best friend was led to believe Taeyong was going to defer his entry to the
Institute by a year, and that’s why he disappeared. Doyoung probably has been busy at the
Peitharchía thus far. By now he is still wondering about Taeyong and why he hasn’t answered any
contact. One day his best friend shows up at his house wanting to see him, unannounced. Taeyong
tells the butler to say he’s not home. Doyoung leaves. Taeyong can’t face him. He can’t let his
oldest friend see him, because Doyoung will know something is wrong with him. Being Taeyong’s
friend is a dangerous spot to be in, and he can’t risk putting Doyoung in that position. So he
decides to cut ties, no matter how it hurts.

Taeyong doesn’t know what day it is when someone knocks on his door. He’s fully dressed—he
can’t sleep with pajamas or comfortable clothes anymore, he developed the second-nature to be
ready for whatever happens—except for shoes. There is an empty bottle of liquor sharing the
mattress with him. His head hurts.
“Who’s there?” he asks groggily.

“It’s mom. Can I come in?”

Taeyong jumps off and opens the door. “Mom. Hey.” He scratches his eye.

She scans him. “Shouldn’t you be getting ready for the party?”

“What party?” Taeyong asks.

“The party is tonight,” she says, smiling kindly. “Did you forget? Are you nervous?”

“What…”

Eunji takes his hand. “I’m so happy for you, son. I know you said you liked Ten, but I’m glad you
are going through with what your father suggested.”

Taeyong has no idea what she’s talking about.

“Yeah. Sure. I’ll get ready.”

“Okay. See you at eight!”

Taeyong showers. He tugs on his cock uselessly. It doesn’t react. It has been dead since he broke
things off with Ten. He gives up.

After drying his hair and styling it, Taeyong gets dressed in a white shirt and black suit, no tie.

When he reaches the main living room of the manor, there are servers going around with trays of
drinks in between many people. He snatches a champagne glass and gulps it all, then sets it aside.
He lounges around until he sees Seulgi. She’s beautiful in a tight light pink dress with off the
shoulder sleeves, her brown hair tied in a bun. She cuts her way through the crowd.

“Hey, you,” she smiles.

“Long time no see,” Taeyong says.

“I know. It’s weird that we are only seeing each other now,” Seulgi chuckles.

Taeyong frowns. “Why?”

“Because of today.”

“What is today?”

Seulgi tilts her head. “Our engagement party. What else?”

Taeyong almost laughs. Because she can only be joking. Of course she’s joking. Isn’t she?

“You and me? Are engaged?”

Seulgi’s smile turns into a grimace. “Your father has been coordinating with mine for months now.
He didn’t tell you?”

“He did not.”

“I thought you accepted this,” she says, shocked but keeping her voice serene.
Taeyong doesn’t know what to say.

“There they are!” Eunji appears. She’s beaming at them, dressed in a fancy cerulean dress. “You
look so good together. Give me a kiss, Seulgi.”

The girl complies.

“I’m so happy we are finally uniting our families,” Eunji says. “I always suspected you would end
up together.”

Seulgi giggles nervously. Taeyong intertwines their hands.

“Yeah. I guess we did,” he says, trying to keep his voice steady.

Seulgi gives him a weird look but stays classy.

After that awkward exchange, Taeyong has to digest the reality that his father went behind his back
and made a commitment in his name to the Kangs. And his mother is happy about it, obviously,
because she probably thinks this is what Taeyong wants. She watched Taeyong grow up with
Seulgi. When they were teenagers, they were always together. So it’s not strange for them to be
engaged now.

The party continues as Taeyong and Seulgi stand side by side and make small talk to people. It’s
torture, but Taeyong keeps a smile on his face.

“We need to talk,” Seulgi whispers.

“When it’s over.”

After the guests leave, Taeyong and Seulgi walk to his room. He leaves his shoes at the door and
grabs a bottle of vodka from his bedside table, uncorking it and drinking. He sits on the bed and
keeps his eyes forward. Seulgi takes the spot next to him.

“We can call this off,” Seulgi says.

They can’t. Taeyong can’t. His father said he would wed him to someone of his choice, and Seojun
chose Seulgi. Out of everyone, it isn’t a bad option. At least, Taeyong likes Seulgi as a friend.

“This is an arranged marriage,” Taeyong says. “You’ll be free to be with anyone you want, as long
as we sire legitimate heirs.”

“I know,” she says.

“Then it’s settled. Let’s do it,” he says it without emotion, drinking more vodka.

They fall silent.

“What happened to you?” she asks quietly.

“Nothing.”

“Taeyong.” Her voice becomes knowing. “Are you still with Ten?”

Right where it hurts.

“No.” He doesn’t want to think about it. Doesn’t want to acknowledge that he’s going to marry
 someone else. That Ten still exists, probably a few miles away, and he can’t have him.

“Do you love him?” she insists.

“Seulgi…” Taeyong starts moving away, but she sits him down again. “I don’t wanna talk about
it.”

She scoots closer to him. Taeyong stays still as she leans and deposits a kiss on the corner of his
mouth.

“I can help,” Seulgi says.

Taeyong knows why she’s doing it. And it’s not for him. It’s for herself. Because she also loves
someone else. It’s easier to get lost in different arms, try and forget.

“I can’t,” Taeyong says.

“I will be here.” With that, she gets up and leaves.

Chapter End Notes

at least ten has jaehyun! and taeyong kinda has seulgi i guess lmao although her way
to offer help is not what he wants
 gain the weight of you then lose it
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten arrives home after getting some coffee with Jaehyun to find his mother weeping, his father
holding her.

“Ma! What happened?” Ten rushes to their side.

She can’t speak, she just waves her phone around. Ten looks at both of them, puzzled, and takes it.
He squints at the letters.

…awarded an apartment.

“What’s this?” Ten asks.

“It says we received an apartment from the government,” Jongdae explains. “From a social housing
program.”

Ten goes over the mail again, now reading it carefully. It states his family was awarded a two-
bedroom apartment in a middle-class neighborhood. It looks official, but Ten never heard of this
before. It says to call a number to qualify for the prize. So Ten does. He talks to a woman that
explains everything is set and ready to go, and she can mail the contract to Jimin’s phone. Ten
accepts but says they will go over it with a lawyer, which the woman says it’s fine. He hangs up
and immediately calls Jaehyun.

“I need your help. Do you know any lawyers?”

Luckily, Jaehyun’s aunt is one, and she agrees to look at the contract for free.

“It’s a standard donation contract,” she explains over the call. “They won’t disclose who’s behind
the offer, though. The corporation that contacted you is a shell company. So it could be the
government, yes, or someone else.”

Someone else. Apprehension simmers in Ten’s gut. He doesn’t want to think it, however his mind
takes him there. But why would Taeyong purchase a home for Ten’s parents when they have
broken up? And if he did, can Ten even accept this? Except, it’s not his offer to accept. The
contract is in his mother’s name. So Ten can either support her choice or not.

Ten searches for government social housing programs and doesn’t find one that awards fully paid
apartments to people. And you need to apply for the programs to be considered. His parents never
applied to anything. This solidifies Ten’s suspicions that Taeyong might have something to do with
it. Should he tell his parents? How can he explain that his ex might have bought them an
apartment? They were sad for Ten when he told them they broke up, but Ten did his best to hide
his sorrow and didn’t badmouth Taeyong. He just said they didn’t work out.

Jimin is so happy about it that Ten can’t bring himself to say anything that might ruin it. What if
they pass up the opportunity to have a home of their own because of Ten’s pride? What if
something happens to Ten, like getting injured on the job, and he can’t provide for them in the
future like he plans to? The more he thinks about it, the more he knows they can’t pass up this
offer. The world is full of twists and turns. If Taeyong really gifted them an apartment, it doesn’t
matter his intentions. The result is Ten’s parents’ security and less financial strain, and that’s Ten’s
top priority.

So they sign the contract and move to the new place in less than a week. Ten has a room in a home
to himself for the first time in his life. Back in Daw he used to share one with his sister, then he
lived in the living room until he went to the Academy, where he got his own space in the final year.
But this one is Ten’s real room, one he can come back to whenever he needs. He invites Jaehyun to
visit now that he doesn’t live in a sketchy neighborhood. Ten explains to him about his suspicions
surrounding the donation of the apartment.

Jaehyun looks conflicted. “I mean…It’s a grand gesture. Even for someone with money like him.
Real estate is expensive in the Capital. But he still broke your heart, which I hate him for.”

“Don’t hate him,” Ten pleads.

“I do hate him. He doesn’t get to lead you on for years only to dump you out of nowhere because
he can’t commit to someone poor.”

“Jaehyunnie…”

“That’s literally what he said. That you’re poor. He called you poor. God, I fucking hate him. If I
ever see him again, I’m gonna punch him in the face.”

Ten laughs even though he doesn’t condone the violence. But his friend being protective warms his
heart.

They order pizza for dinner and chat about their expectation for Peitharchía, which is starting soon.

In the semi-darkness of his room, Taeyong checks his phone for a notification. It’s a mail from the
family lawyer.

SUBJECT: CONTRACT SIGNED.

The corners of his mouth tug up faintly. He hasn’t smiled genuinely in a long time, but this makes
him happy.

Taeyong started the procedures to buy Ten’s parents an apartment last summer before they broke
up. When he was thrown into the Red Stain and forced to break up with Ten, he didn’t have the
time to back down. Everything was set up, and he decided to just go through with it concealing his
involvement and see if they would accept. He’s glad they did. They deserve to have the peace of
mind of owning a place of their own, not worry about the expensive rent of the Capital. And it’s a
way to make up for getting Ten caught up in his cursed life and making him suffer.

He puts his phone down and reaches for the drawer. He carefully takes the picture of Ten and
looks at it. It still hurts to see his smile and know he can’t be with him, see it in the flesh. He
returns the photograph to its rightful place and grabs the bottle of vodka, gulping it down. He’s
used to the burn now—it’s almost nothing.

Taeyong relaxes as the alcohol courses through his system, and he stares into nothingness.
Ten was the best thing that ever happened to him. Taeyong finds comfort in thinking that at least
they had some time together, instead of none. He will cling to those precious memories forever.

He drinks again. And waits.

Because the Red Stain will contact him soon.

The first day in the Peitharchía Institute, Ten is dressed in formal uniform, which is navy, with a
cap, white gloves, and a red belt. He stands in line proudly with Jaehyun at his side. They are
welcomed with a speech by Director Lee Sooman.

Just like the Academy, they live and study and train in the Institute, which is on the outskirts of the
Capital. But unlike the dorms in the Academy, that were large rooms filled with bunks, the rooms
are shared between four people. Ten and Jaehyun applied to be put in the same room, even if they
are pledging differently. They are pleased to find out they are rooming together.

They settle in the bunk bed, Jaehyun on the top on and Ten in the bottom, just like during the
Academy. They are getting their things organized when two girls enter.

It’s Sejin and another girl from their old class, Yeri. Ten schools his expression and greets them
warmly. After Sejin apologized, Ten decided to leave the past behind and harbor no hard feelings
towards her.

“Do you guys wanna go have dinner together?” Ten asks later, as everyone has settled in.

“Sure!” Yeri smiles.

The four head to the cafeteria, now dressed in the gray Institute uniform. The conversation comes
easy as they talk about the specializations they wanna pursue. Yeri wants to go into Intelligence.

“National Defense,” Sejin says.

Ten’s eyebrows go up. “Me too.”

“Really? If everything goes well, we’ll be classmates then.” Sejin smiles warmly.

The first semester of the Peitharchía is meant for pre-curriculum courses that assess your ability to
pledge a specialization, so you pick the ones according to the requirements you need to meet. If
you don’t pass, you are dropped completely, no chance to retake anything. Everything is a
thousand times harder here, but Ten is looking forward to proving himself.

For National Defense, Ten will take Combat, Firearms, Strategy, Foreign Policy, and
Counterterrorism. He shares the same classes with Sejin, and they end up flocking to each other.
He gives her some pointers with the assault rifles’ recoil.

“You need to recenter the aim before the tenth bullet,” Ten explains.

“You keep track of the bullets?”

“Yeah…” Ten shrugs nervously.

 “That’s why we call you Sharpshooter, Lee.” She smiles. “Thank you.”

It’s not a problem to help her, because they aren’t competing for a spot now. The Institute is ready
to educate all the ones that pass the pre-curriculum. The total amount of semesters spent in
Peitharchía are five.

Before winter break, they take their exams. Ten achieves the highest marks, landing the top spot of
his classes.

They get two weeks off. Ten and Jaehyun decide to invite Sejin and Yeri to a bar to celebrate all of
them passing. Now that his parents don’t have to pay rent, Ten has a bit of spending money to do
things like that.

When Ten arrives home drunk, he sluggishly strips down to his underwear. He climbs under the
covers of the double bed, a real bed now, not only a mattress. He blinks slowly at the ceiling
illuminated by the city lights.

In moments like this, it is hard to prevent his mind from wandering. The ring hangs heavy around
his neck like an omen of things that ought to stay in the past but seem to dance around the corners
of Ten’s life, always there like ghosts. A mark he can’t erase. He plays with the token of his old
relationship, rolling it between his fingers.

Everything is in place. There is only one thing that’s missing.

Chapter End Notes

it will be normal for time to pass quickly during some passages now, like it did in this
chapter.

i hope you are all enjoying it even with taeten apart :( they'll meet sooner than later
 but now my eyes leak acid rain on the pillow
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Taeyong has learned to be an obedient man. He smiles when it’s required. He makes conversation.

It’s Christmas. It’s supposed to be a jolly time of the year. All Taeyong wants is to go back to the
darkness of his room and drink until he passes out. But he’s sitting with his family, future bride and
in-laws at the dining room table. So he plays the part because what else can he do? He’s living in a
cage he was forced to fit into.

When he finally escapes, he climbs into his bed with a bottle of vodka. He’s lying down, sipping it
when Seulgi comes in and sits beside him. She takes a pack of smokes from her purse and lights
one.

“Do you want one?” she asks.

“No.”

Taeyong offers her some vodka, and she accepts. They stay silent while she smokes, and they
drink.

“Do you remember our first hangover?” Seulgi asks.

Taeyong snorts a short chuckle. “Yeah. It sucked.”

“We stole from your father’s liquor cabinet and hid here.”

“I held your hair while you vomited.”

“I’m glad I can hold my liquor now,” she says.

“No, you can’t.”

“You can’t.”

“I don’t intend to.”

Seulgi laughs and puts out the cigarette on the windowsill, leaving it there.

“Give me that.” She grabs the bottle again.

“How’s Irene?” Taeyong decides to ask.

He can sense her body tensing next to his, he doesn’t even need to look to know.

“She’s fine. Why do you care?”

Taeyong shrugs. He feels her eyes on him, so he looks at her.

“What?”

“You’re a jerk.”
He doesn’t protest. Seulgi surprises Taeyong by straddling him.

“Are you drunk already?” Taeyong asks, his hands moving to her shoulders to push her away.

She grabs his wrists and presses them on the bed, their faces close together.

“No. Are you?”

“Yes.”

“Just kiss me,” she says.

Fuck it. Taeyong closes the gap between their lips. He was seventeen the last time he kissed Seulgi.
It’s eerily familiar. He feels like a teenager again. He imagines that he is a teenager, exploring sex
for the first time when they were both fifteen. Because the alternative is depressing. He tries his
hardest to pry intrusive thoughts out of his head.

His cock reacts to what they are doing and Taeyong thinks maybe there is hope. Maybe this means
he has moved on finally. He keeps his eyes closed in an attempt to enjoy it better, his hands over
her thighs. They don’t undress. Seulgi just takes Taeyong’s erection out of his pants.

Her hand is… small.

Seulgi feels different against him. She smells different. Her body is different.

Different from Ten.

“Stop.”

She does.

“I can’t,” he says quietly.

Seulgi moves to lie down beside him, and he puts his dick into his pants again.

“Sorry,” he adds.

“It’s okay.”

They fall silent. He reaches for the vodka again. Taeyong wishes he could appreciate this like he
did when he was younger, but it doesn’t work.

“You still love him, don’t you?” Seulgi asks.

Taeyong doesn’t want to say it out loud, so he says nothing. Seulgi’s phone pings.

“Shit. They are waiting for me to go home.” Seulgi kisses his cheek before getting up. “Call me.”
She leaves.

Taeyong stares at the ceiling.

He can hear a sweet, distance voice.

The world can be a cold place.

And the only thing that keeps him warm now is the liquor bottle in his hand.
The first time Ten touches himself, he’s alone in his dorm room in a time he knows all his
roommates are busy. He bought lube and fingers himself open curiously after the shower, chasing
the same feeling of when Taeyong did that for him. He reminisces, sucking Taeyong’s digits,
having his rim stretched. He can’t stop himself from fantasizing about it as he searches for his
spot. The mixture of massaging his prostate with imaging Taeyong doing it and the thrill that
comes from the fear that anyone could open the door at any moment makes Ten reach his orgasm
very quickly, whispering Taeyong’s name.

He cleans himself and pulls the covers on top of him, evening his breath. He feels a bit
embarrassed to be so aroused by his ex-boyfriend, after all this time. It has been over a year since
they broke up. He still remembers Taeyong’s touch so well. He feels stupid now that they never
had anal sex. He regrets not taking things further, finding that side of things out with Taeyong. He
can’t imagine himself with anyone else. He can point out pretty faces among the students, but he
doesn’t feel attracted to them. Maybe he still loves Taeyong.

The weight of the ring is both heavy and light. It’s both healing and wounding. Both bright and
dark.

“Doyoung mentioned something,” Jaehyun whispers suddenly while they are at the library.

Ten raises his head to look at him.

“What?”

“It’s about Taeyong. We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to know.”

Ten’s stomach churns. “Say it.”

“I didn’t ask,” Jaehyun justifies himself. “I don’t talk about your stupid ex. But Doyoung looked
obviously sad the last time we saw each other, so I pressed on. He told me Taeyong never came to
Peitharchía. That he said he was deferring his entry for a year. But he never responded Doyoung’s
messages and just… disappeared.” That explains why Ten has never seen him on campus, even
though it’s large and littered with buildings.

The first thing Ten thinks is Taeyong has died, and he panics. He’s in a very public place, though,
so when his eyes start to water, he hides behind his hand.

“Tennie… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

“It’s okay,” Ten says hoarsely. He sniffles and tries to swallow his tears. “He probably just
changed his mind or something. Who knows. It’s not like he needs to work, he’s rich.”

Ten is overreacting. Taeyong isn’t dead.

After that conversation, Ten hesitates but goes through obituaries and doesn’t find Taeyong’s name
anywhere. The relief he feels is insurmountable. He doesn’t hate Taeyong, even after everything
that happened. He doesn’t wish him harm. Maybe Taeyong had to follow in his father’s footsteps
and take over the family business after all.
In the Institute, they don’t have months-long summer vacation, just two weeks like winter break.
The year goes by in a flash of events as Ten trains and specializes in National Defense. In the last
year, he chooses his focus on Counterterrorism. He’ll help fight the Red Stain firsthand. It’s an
entire twelve months of intense training.

During this time, the Red Stain attacks increase. Ten keeps close tabs on everything about it, filing
articles away. They start targeting trucks that bring supplies to refugee camps, raid public food and
water storages. They also create civic chaos by planting bombs on spots around the city. Luckily,
the anti-bomb squad has managed to handle all the attempts so far. But the Counterterrorist unit
designated to strategize against the neo-fascist group never manages to pin them down or predict
where they’ll strike next. The Red Stain seems to know the layout of the Capital well, because
they can appear and disappear in the blink of an eye. Ten suspects they must have recruited
civilians who help them. There is also the matter of communication. Since everyone using wi-fi is
under constant surveillance, groups like the Red Stain access the deep web, masked by thousands
of layers of encryption, so uncovering them is hard. They also use secret codes to talk on the
official public web. Most of their communication, though, must be offline and therefore
untraceable. Their goal is to spread turmoil and undermine the government, and they are achieving
it. People take to the streets to protest, demanding protection.

When Ten and Jaehyun graduate, both with government job offers, they go out partying with
Doyoung.

It’s a big surprise when they find Johnny at the club. They invite him to join them as they do vodka
shots.

Ten is laughing, messy drunk.

The next thing he knows, Johnny is hauling his legs on top of his lap. Then his arm is circling
Ten’s back, pulling him close. Ten is so out of it, he has a hard time grasping what’s happening
until Johnny’s lips touch his ear.

“You’re so sexy.”

Ten giggles. Jaehyun and Doyoung are on the dancefloor, far away from them. Johnny starts
kissing Ten’s neck, who flutters his eyes shut. Johnny’s other hand closes around his waist. His
mouth drags up against Ten’s and then his tongue is pushing in. Ten kisses him back, feeling out of
practice. Or maybe they just don’t fit. There is a disconnect going on, and Ten tries to adjust to
match into Johnny’s touch, but no matter what he does, it doesn’t happen.

He keeps kissing Johnny, nonetheless, wondering if maybe it will improve with time. Until
Johnny’s hand, which was stroking Ten’s thigh, moves up towards his crotch. Ten startles and
pushes it away.

“Don’t be shy,” Johnny croons.

Ten just flinches away from him and moves out of his lap, standing up.

“I have to go.”

With that, he leaves the club. He shoots a message to Jaehyun, letting him know he left. Sitting on
the subway on his way back home, Ten feels tainted and disgusted with himself. Disgusted with
 the way Johnny kissed and touched him. He doesn’t dislike Johnny, he thought it would be a good
idea to make out with him. He used to have a crush on him after all, maybe they would connect.
But no. He just feels empty and stupid.

It has been three years since Taeyong broke up with him. That realization hits him hard. Three
years, and he’s still hung up on him. He can coast through life and pretend he isn’t, with his studies
all this time to occupy and distract him. But in this winter night, when he’s all alone in the cold, the
warmth of Taeyong’s arms is the most inviting thing.

“Ten—Ten—Ah!”

Taeyong jerks off through his high as the hot water hits his nape, arm stretched with his hand
propped on the bathroom wall. He shudders as he finishes off. Emptiness follows. He ends his
shower. He’s used to being his pathetic self that can only cum when he fantasizes about his ex-
boyfriend. Even if he hasn’t laid his eyes on Ten for the three years, when he shuts his lids is easy
to picture him.

Maybe Taeyong is going insane.

It wouldn’t be unlikely.

Piles of alcohol, trauma, and sleepless nights will do that to anyone. He can’t even go to a therapist
to fix his problems because they are obliged to report crimes, and Taeyong’s life for the past years
has revolved around being a part of a neo-fascist terrorist organization that has been sowing chaos
around Corinth.

No. He’s alone.

There is no one at his side.

Taeyong climbs into bed in a vain attempt to keep warm.

When he shuts his eyes, he sees Ten, along with three shining stars.

Chapter End Notes

it's been three years but they are still together in the sky ✨
 and i was catching my breath staring out an open window catching my death
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten is so excited to land his first job as a special operative in the Counterterrorist Division of
Corinth. He has a salary for the first time in his life and he can support himself. He rents a studio
that’s walking distance to his office building. To add to the joy, Jaehyun and Doyoung decide to
rent the apartment next to his, because the Cybersecurity and Counterintelligence departments
where they work are also nearby. They order pizza and have shots of vodka after they sign the
lease and move in.

Ten gets his own credit card and buys work clothes and a couple pieces of essential furniture for
his home. The place is small, but tidy and cozy. On his first day of work, he dresses in a black suit.
He wants to make a good impression. His heart pounds in his chest like it’s about to pop out. He
makes sure to be extra early. He puts on his winter coat and leaves. Ten strolls on the snow-
covered streets happily.

When he arrives, he’s sent to the register his ID with a photo and fingerprints. Then he’s led to a
meeting room where the new operatives are going to meet each other and their superiors. He pours
himself some coffee from the tall thermos as he waits.

“Lee. I thought I’d find you here.” It’s Sejin.

Ten smiles. “Hey, Sejin. How are you?”

“I’m great. Happy that I made into the new recruits. And of course you did too.”

“Yeah. I’m glad we’ll work together.”

When their superior arrives, they are informed of how everything works. They will be split into
tactical units—assault teams, snipers, anti-bomb, intelligence officers—after an assessment, and
train together before being deemed ready for missions. Later in their careers they can move into
other branches, like leading and planning missions, resource and personal management, command
and training, surveillance, and reconnaissance.

After a long but satisfying day, Ten walks home. He decides to stop at a coffee shop on his street
and reward himself with a hot chocolate, because it’s winter, so it’s perfect for it. He waits for his
order near the counter when a woman approaches to pick hers up as her name blinks with blue
letters on the black screen. Ten raises his eyes to look at her.

Irene. The beautiful woman is pouring a packet of sugar into her drink, her long brown hair down.
She’s wearing a black winter coat. She is twirling her beverage and glances around, ends up
meeting Ten. She smiles.

“Sharpshooter!”

“Irene.” Ten is surprised she remembers him, and that she knows his nickname. “How are you?”

“I’m good. How about you?”

“I’m great. Do you work nearby?”

“Yeah. At the Cybersecurity department. I live on this street.”

“Me too! I just started on the Counterterrorism Division today.”

“Let me guess. You’ll be shooting things?”

Ten laughs. “Very likely.”

“You were a legend back at the Academy.”

Ten blushes. He thought only students from his year knew about that.

“Let’s trade numbers. Maybe we can grab a drink sometime?” she offers.

“Sure!”

They do that and they each go home. Turns out she lives just a couple of buildings away from
Ten’s.

Taeyong watches the snow-covered streets through the telephoto lens of the camera that’s propped
on the tripod. He’s in a bare apartment, equipment facing towards the window. He yawns and sips
his steaming coffee. Another badly slept night preceded a long day of work. He and Park partnered
today for surveillance.

After his training, which was based on his aptitudes, Taeyong’s main job in the Red Stain became
the gathering of intelligence. The government keeps a lot of information offline in local databases.
So Taeyong spends time observing these spots, keeping tabs on who works where, their shifts, the
architecture, daily flow of people, positions of cameras, security personnel, he traces timetables of
their routines, he learns the ins and outs of the object of his inspections. All of this so the Red Stain
can know how to break into a place with the utmost efficiency, without fuss or drawing much
attention to themselves. Taeyong also gathers intelligence on specific targets, like government
officials. He follows and learns everything about them that can’t be discovered online, the tiniest
details of their lives and routines and relationships. Taeyong has spent many nights watching other
people fuck their lovers through a lens. He also gathers military intelligence, which is what he’s
doing today.

It’s the first day of the new recruits arriving at the offices of the Counterterrorism Division, and
they need to mark their faces. They photograph everyone entering the building then crossmatch
with the ID profiles they already have, pulling background checks to infer the unit where they
might be assigned to.

There is a line formed at the external gates that takes a while to move, because they scan the
fingerprint and run the face of everyone on the system before letting them in. From his angle,
Taeyong can see the front-left side of people’s faces. Everything is well until a new person shows
up. He drags the lens towards them.

Taeyong freezes.

Ten.
It’s him. Undeniably him. As gorgeous as ever, after three years since they last saw each other. His
hair is longer than it used to be, the same pitch-black color. With a quickened pulse, Taeyong can
see him so clearly, his excited face. He can almost cross the threshold of the scope and reach out to
him. The line moves and Taeyong keeps up with him, snapping photographs. Snow is pooling on
his head, but the cold doesn’t seem to bother him. He looks flushed, warm, alive. So perfect, just
like when Taeyong left him in that hotel room. A goosebump runs through Taeyong’s skin at the
thought of kissing him again, turning into faint arousal, even as they stand miles away from each
other. Even if Taeyong left the building now and ran the blocks in his direction, he wouldn’t make
it in time. But the impulse is there, as alive as a heartbeat. The line walks again.

It hits Taeyong. Ten is one of the new recruits. This means… it means Ten has just become his
number one enemy. It means they are on opposite sides, and Ten will be in danger. A wave of
sickness strikes Taeyong, his stomach turning with revolt. No. He can’t let this happen. How can
he protect Ten?

His ex-boyfriend gets his face and fingerprint scanned. Soon, he’s crossing into the building and
disappearing.

“Take on the camera,” Taeyong spouts to Park, and hurries to the bathroom.

He kneels in front of the toilet and hurls his coffee.

“Gross, dude,” he hears Park say.

Taeyong heaves and wipes his lips on toilet paper before getting up and washing his mouth on the
sink.

“We highly recommend you join the Skopós,” the commander is telling Ten.

The Skopós Sniper Squad, the group of elite shooters that work under the Counterterrorist
Division. Ten is so flattered, but he keeps his expression calm.

“I think that would be ideal, ma’am.”

So Ten joins the Skopós. He’s fitted into a new black uniform next. It consists of two sets of pants
and shirts of a durable but breathable fabric, one for warm and one for cold weather; black faux-
leather boots; knee pads; side leg holster for a pistol; utility belt and tactical plate vest; gloves;
balaclava mask; helmet; googles; black baseball cap.

Ten is introduced to his equipment. A ghillie suit that will camouflage him in nature. There is a
survival kit that he would use in case of a deployment in the wilderness or in case he gets separated
from his team in a dangerous situation. He receives a shimmery combat knife. For a pistol, he gets
a Glock 19. There is a small wireless earbud that captures his voice and transmits sounds perfectly.
Plus, a range finder and a device that measures wind, barometric pressure, humidity, and altitude.

And then there is the rifle.

A black NCT127. The most elite weapon in the world, standard in Corinth, reserved only for
special operatives. Ten has been shooting with rifles for five years but has never seen one of these.
When he picks it up in his hands, its weight feels just right. He gets a thrill in his blood, like he’s
found something truly special.

Ten easily connects with his gun, which is the next step in his training. They are supposed to name
their sniper rifles. Ten chooses the name Ghost for his. They are sent to the outskirts of the Capital
to practice shots. He is only honing the skill he already developed throughout the years, while
getting acquainted with the weapon that will be used during his entire career.

Ten is paired with his spotter, a man named Kim Heechul. He’s an experienced Skopós sniper.
That’s how the units work, a shooter, the one with the gun, and a spotter, the one that observes
through a spotting scope and helps with directions. Heechul is very good-natured, and they get
along well easily.

Spring comes, then summer. And Ten is evaluated and deemed ready for field missions.

He continues tactical training and is on call for twenty-four hours every three days.

Everything is quiet until he gets a call.

For months, Taeyong doesn’t know what to do with the information he has about Ten. Through
their intelligence gathering, the Red Stain confirms Ten is part of the Skopós, the elite sniper squad
of Corinth.

His first thought is how proud he is. Taeyong remembers the time he saw Ten at the shooting
range back at the Academy, how his posture denoted insecurity when he held a gun. He gave Ten
simple instructions and his ex-boyfriend thrived from there. With years of discipline and practice,
he became one of the best shots in the country.

His second thought is how scared this makes him. It means Ten will be put in dangerous situations,
probably up against the Red Stain. Even though snipers operate covertly—camouflage is one of
their biggest assets even in an urban area—the neo-fascists can use counter sniper tactics to
determine his location and ambush him.

His third thought is he’ll do everything is his power to protect Ten. It won’t be easy, because he
needs to make sure he is never found out, otherwise it ends for both of them. However, as years
passed, he seemingly adjusted into the Red Stain well, even if this is a part he plays. His group
mates trust him. His father has stopped breathing down his neck and even seems faintly pleased
that Taeyong doesn’t complain about anything, that he’s been so complacent. He probably thinks
Taeyong just got over Ten.

Taeyong knows his communication devices are still being watched by his father and the Red Stain,
it’s standard in the group. What Seojun doesn’t know is Taeyong’s training as a covert operative,
and that living as a secret dissident among his peers, having to be on his toes all the time in order to
survive, knowing his every move was watched through the years, has taught Taeyong more than a
few tricks. He is a full-fledged covert agent by now. He can easily blend into a crowd, go
undercover, remain undetected, lose a tail, he has memorized most of the Capital’s map and the
escape routes they use, he can stay calm under severe stress, read body language—tell by the way
people carry themselves how much military training they have or if they’re becoming aggressive
—, his awareness of his surroundings is uncanny. All his years of developing a combination of
military skills have rewarded him with the self-discipline he needs to do this now.
 Taeyong has put this to the test before, trying out his own evasive abilities. He’s been giving
anonymous tips to the government about the attempted bombings perpetrated by the Red Stain,
which resulted in them not being successful. He hasn’t risked doing this for everything the group
does, otherwise it would be obvious a snitch is among them, and they might smoke him out. When
the Red Stain does covert operations with no intention of harming civilians or drawing attention,
Taeyong ignores them. And unfortunately, he also isn’t aware of every plan they concoct.

Taeyong is lying in bed half-asleep when his phone pings.

Chapter End Notes

phones ringing almost at the same time...

an idea of ten's uniform, missing only his helmet

 there’s an ache in you put there by the ache in me
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten is uniformed and ready to go. He’s been quickly briefed. There was a call from a government
facility stating armed and masked people have entered the building. There is no confirmation that
this is the Red Stain or something else. It takes less than half an hour for Ten and Heechul to be
dropped at the building they’ve been strategically assigned to, where they can watch the facility
from one of the floors. When Ten’s equipment is set and ready to go, he stands straight and
positions his eye on the scope.

They communicate quietly and objectively, while paying close attention to the radio. The targeted
building’s walls are all glass, so they can see inside it clearly. Because there are civilians involved,
the command center is assessing the situation while the tactical team waits to react. In the
meantime, Ten observes. He is a little nervous about being in the field for the first time, risking
taking a life for the first time—but he has gone through enough mental conditioning that he can
push this feeling aside and focus on his job. He knows in most cases a sniper shot is the last resort,
and if this is indeed the Red Stain, the Division’s priority is to capture them alive for interrogation.

He finally sees a group of eight masked people come onto a floor, all carrying handguns. The
employees present panic and either try to run or duck.

“I have eyes on eight hostile targets on the thirteenth floor,” Ten says into his comm.

They corner the civilians together. Ten keeps his sight on the situation as the seconds tick.

“TNT, wait for orders,” the command answers back.

“Roger that.”

“Roger that.”

Taeyong immediately recognizes Ten’s voice. So it’s confirmed, he’s in the area.

The Red Stain has raided a government facility to access files in a local database that is cut off
from the main networks, so it’s unhackable. They broke into it to gather sensitive information that
will further their strategic spread of terror and future Red Stain plans—something Taeyong isn’t
fully aware of, because he doesn’t have the clearance for it.

Without the knowledge of the Counterterrorism Division, the Red Stain is able to tap into their
tactical comm when they are in a certain range of distance, which always puts them one step ahead
of them. Seojun makes sure they have access to advanced military technology acquired from
international dealers that has perpetuated the Red Stain’s advantage throughout the years.

Now Taeyong knows Ten is here, somewhere. He switches back to his own team’s comm.

Taeyong spent months surveying the government building for this mission to unfold. And when he
was called to the last meeting before it, he decided to volunteer to the counter sniper team, on the
guise that he knows the area well and can get places faster than others. Since it’s not a high-risk
job, they accepted, and now he is partnered with Choi. They are in disguise, carrying basic
backpacks, wearing baggy civilian clothes that hide the bulletproof vest they have on, concealed
pistol and knife. There is a third person scanning the area with binoculars on top of a building with
the sole purpose of spotting the Skopós shooter. Taeyong and Choi are tasked to take down
preemptively the sniper threat to protect their group mates.

Taeyong waits for instructions, hoping Ten doesn’t get spotted.

“I see something,” the onlooker says through the comm. “ 1287 Fifth Street, twentieth floor,
window facing northeast.”

“On our way. Keep searching for other potential threats,” Choi tells him.

“Red 1, we are headed to 1287 Fifth Street,” Taeyong informs.

“Roger that, GTA. Surveillance hijack is ready,” Red 1 replies. Most buildings have cameras and
they need to conceal their movements, so looping the video feed is a standard action for them.

It’s a commercial building and they sneak in through the garage, using the service elevator to go
up. Taeyong’s heart skips a beat as he feels the weight of the gun in his shoulder holster. He wants
to avoid killing Choi, because if his partner dies in a weird place or supposedly ‘safe’ situation that
would raise questions. And maybe Ten isn’t even in the building, maybe the light is playing tricks
on the onlooker’s view. If Choi has to die, it needs to make sense, so Taeyong’s loyalty isn’t put
into suspicion. It needs to look like they attacked the sniper unit and things went badly for them.

They reach the floor, put on balaclava masks, and stalk the corridor of rooms that face the
northeast. The entire floor has been evacuated. Choi has a pistol in his hand as he takes the lead
and scans each room, Taeyong watching his back but looking over Choi’s shoulder to see what he
finds.

Choi opens a door quietly. He makes a gesture with his hand and raises his index and middle
finger. Two people in the room. The air in Taeyong’s lungs falters, but he doesn’t. Choi points at
the spotter, signaling that he’ll take that target down. Taeyong needs to think fast. They step into
the room and Choi raises his arm.

Taeyong bumps his shoulder into Choi’s back as the shot is fired, which misses the spotter. The
Skopós unit turns around in an instant, drawing their pistols. Taeyong grabs Choi by the back of his
clothes and uses him as a human shield—it helps that Choi is ten centimeters taller than Taeyong
—as shots fire in their direction and Taeyong walks backwards to escape. Six shots, and one hits
Choi’s head, spraying blood on Taeyong. A seventh shot hits Taeyong in the right shoulder. He
drops Choi and dashes down the corridor. He hears a couple more shots, but none hit him.

As he enters the elevator, he clicks the ground floor button. He takes off his bloodied balaclava
mask and coat, putting them down.

“Red 1, Tower is down. I repeat, Tower is down. I’ve been shot.”

“Roger that, GTA.”

“I’m taking my escape route.”

Taeyong grabs a gray baseball cap, sunglasses, a white facemask and black coat from his backpack
and puts is all on, storing the stained things he was wearing before. There is a hotness at the wound
in his shoulder, but the adrenaline combined with his pain tolerance prevents him from even
flinching from it.

He calmly exits the building and blends with the crowd.

Soon, he’s accessing the subway, and from there, he gets on a train. Standing casually among the
passengers, Taeyong concocts a tale of what happened back in the building, something to tell his
superiors and convince them they couldn’t take down the sniper team. He’ll say the spotter and
Choi simultaneously saw each other, and it was too late for Choi, so Taeyong just had to leave him
before getting killed himself. That will have to do. After a couple of stops, he exits on another
station and heads outside.

Taeyong reaches the Red Stain safehouse, which is empty. He strips his chest bare, heading to the
bathroom. He examines his shoulder through the reflection in the mirror, a small red hole in the
skin. It’s not bleeding much anymore, which probably means it hasn’t hit any major arteries. He
turns around to examine the back. No exit wound. There is an ache now like he’s received a hard
hit against the area, but the movement of his arm and shoulder is not impaired. He washes and
sanitizes the injury, then bandages it. The bullet will stay inside him unless it presents a problem
further down the line, which may not happen.

He puts his t-shirt back on, sits down and waits while he sips some water.

He just saw Ten.

Taeyong was in the same room as his ex-boyfriend after almost four years, face to face. Even in
the middle of the high-risk situation, he quickly took note of his presence under his black Skópos
uniform, recognized the way he moved and held his pistol. For a second there, he looked into his
eyes as Ten shot Choi down, then hit Taeyong on the shoulder. Yes, Taeyong knows it was Ten
who shot him—he saw his arm raising in his direction and Ten looking at him. It was an instant,
but this made his heart spark with life more than anything he’s felt in a long time. Getting shot
doesn’t affect him as much as seeing Ten does.

Not even the death of his teammate affects him. Choi was a blatant racist. He chose to join the Red
Stain, he knew the risks he was putting himself into.

But Taeyong completed his mission. Ten is safe and alive. That’s all that matters now.

It was Ten’s headshot that killed the Red Stain operative.

Like second nature, he first shot two in the chest, realizing the opponent was wearing a bulletproof
vest. So he raised his arm and shot him in the left temple, then aimed at the person behind him,
hitting them in the shoulder. Heechul shot the first perpetrator three times on the abdomen. The
second operative fled and Heechul ran out of the room to attempt another shot, but was unable to
hit him.

Because they are in the middle of the mission and after they need to report to their superior
officers, Ten doesn’t have the time to process the feelings he has on ending someone else’s life.
What he quickly tells himself before he continues through the motions is that it was either him or
them.
As Ten and Heechul retell what happened, Ten realizes something feels off. The entire situation
was weird. From his point of view, he was standing looking through his scope when he heard a
gunshot, immediately reacting by pulling his pistol. What he saw next was the first Red Stain
hostile, and the second one seemed to pull the first in front of him while backing out of the room.

Why did he do that? Why didn’t both of them shoot at the same time? How did one of them miss
the first shot when it was so easy to strike? Did one of them trip and accidentally pull the trigger?
They were quiet enough that they could have sneaked behind Ten and Heechul, in the minute that
Heechul wasn’t checking their surroundings, and each taken one of them out. But that didn’t
happen.

Ten brings his concerns to his superiors, and they say they’ll take it into consideration. It’s left at
that.

In the end, the Red Stain succeeded in their mission to collect data from the government and
somehow evade capture. They seem experts in blending with civilians.

Later that night, Ten sits in his kitchen with Jaehyun who places a bottle of vodka and serves them
two shots. They stay silent as they sip their drinks.

“I couldn’t look at the body after,” Ten says quietly.

“That’s fair.” Jaehyun places his hand on top of Ten’s forearm that’s over the table.

Ten sighs and gulps the vodka.

“I’m glad you’re okay,” his friend says. “How are you feeling?”

“I know it was justified, but it is still difficult to digest,” Ten explains.

Ten knows he killed a Red Stain, a representation of the hatred for people like him, innocent
people. He knows he had no other choice. It happened. It will probably happen again. He knew
what he signed up when he decided to join the Skopós. He chose to use his abilities to protect
others, even if means pulling the trigger.

Ten is feeling numb the next day and decides to get some air on his break. He heads to the usual
coffee shop on his street to get a drink. He can brew himself something at home but thinks it will
do well to move and be around regular people. He can sit there and watch something on his phone.

Since it’s fall, Ten orders something unusual, a pumpkin spiced latte. He finds a small circular
table and sits down.

“Ten!”

He raises his eyes to find a cheerful Irene there. The two of them actually went out with Jaehyun
and Doyoung for a drink. She’s very friendly and fun. Beside her is Seulgi, who looks surprised to
see him. Ten controls his own shock and gives a polite smile.

“Hey.”

“This is my friend Seulgi. I think you know each other from the Academy?”

“We do,” Seulgi answers for them.

 “Ten is basically my neighbor,” Irene chuckles.

“We should get going,” Seulgi says before her friend can say anything else.

“Okay. See you, Ten. Tell Jaehyun and Doyoung I said hi!”

Irene waves goodbye, and they leave.

Seeing Seulgi feels weird after all the years. She looks different, more mature, but still beautiful. It
makes Ten think about Taeyong, and he dislikes when that happens because he still harbors
heartache that never healed.

He wonders how his ex-boyfriend is doing

Chapter End Notes

ten: *shoots taeyong*

taeyong: *doesnt care he got shot, just that he saw ten up close*

also, seulgi knows where ten lives.........................

 break free and leave us in ruins, took this dagger in me and removed it
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“I have to talk to you.”

Seulgi gets into Taeyong’s room without an invitation. Most of his free time is spent at his new
apartment, in downtown Capital, but he sometimes visits his mother back at the manor. He’s been
dismissed from his missions temporarily while he heals from his bullet wound, around two weeks.
He took the time to hide and drink, as per usual. Seulgi must have asked his mother if he was
around to show up unannounced like this. Taeyong sits up on the bed and she takes the spot on the
foot of the mattress.

“What is it?” he asks.

“I saw Ten.”

Taeyong tenses in an instant. He needs to come up with an answer to that, but his mind goes blank.
His mouth hangs slightly open like he’s stupid. Seulgi seems apprehensive.

“He lives in Irene’s street,” she explains. “We were grabbing a cup of coffee, and he was there. She
casually greeted him.”

“Where does Irene live?”

“24 Roz Street.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Taeyong asks blankly.

“I thought maybe… maybe you’d want to see him.”

Taeyong quiets, his stomach doing an uncomfortable flip.

“You can, you know,” Seulgi continues. “I don’t mind, obviously. If you like him, you can be with
him.”

“I can’t,” Taeyong says before he thinks it through. He covers his face with his hand and sighs.

“Why not?” Seulgi presses on.

“Because I broke up with him,” he explains. A truth. “I broke his heart. Why would he want me?
He probably got over me already. It’s been almost four years.”

“But you like him,” she says earnestly.

“That doesn’t matter.”

“Why did you break up with him in the first place?”

“Can we not go into this? It’s over. There’s no point.”

“Taeyong—”
“I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“You can’t keep running from it!” Seulgi stands, her voice rising.

“Who are you to talk about running?” Taeyong snaps back, finally reaching his limit. “Does Irene
even know you love her?”

Seulgi’s eyes bulge. Taeyong regrets saying it immediately, because it’s clear his friend is
projecting her own unresolved bullshit with Irene on him and Ten. Not that his bullshit is any less
unresolved.

“Seulgi…”

But she’s gone.

Taeyong throws himself on his bed, exhaling hard. Seulgi is right, he is a jerk. But her bringing
Ten up this way digs into wounds worse than the bullet lodged into his flesh.

For the next hours, Taeyong thinks. He fights a battle against his better judgement and eventually
loses. He gets up, gears up, and leaves.

It takes a couple of days of reconnaissance for Taeyong to figure out which apartment Ten lives in.
On a rooftop far from there, he watches through binoculars as Ten walks into his home and turns
on the lights. Seeing him always has the same effect on Taeyong, twisting his emotions like a
blender. Want, longing, need, desire, sadness. Everything jumbled together. Ten puts his black coat
in a wall hanger, revealing his shoulder holster and pistol, which he takes out next. After a couple
of minutes, while Taeyong just watches him, Ten opens the door again. Jaehyun and Doyoung step
inside.

Taeyong’s heart that was already splitting breaks further. He hasn’t seen Doyoung in so long. His
best friend that he left behind when he joined the Red Stain. He couldn’t face him. He knew
Doyoung would see Taeyong and understand something had shifted, because they knew each other
so well. It was dangerous to have Doyoung around, to have any friends, when you were in a group
like Red Stain. It was the best decision for them to just cut contact. It doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt
still.

The three friends laugh and talk to each other, sitting on the couch. Taeyong’s eyes burn with tears
he doesn’t want to acknowledge or shed. In another life, he would have been there with them,
inside that warm bubble.

The death of a statesperson who worked with border policy puts the entire Capital on alert. Right
after, the Red Stain posts a video in a famous online social forum, claiming this is what happens to
‘blood traitors’—officials who support immigrant and refugee rights, or simply do their jobs to
allow them to persist in Corinth. The government is rightfully alarmed, and law enforcement
increases on the streets.

As months pass and the new year advances, the Red Stain attempts other assassinations,
sometimes succeeding, sometimes not. Always key government personnel, which causes most
officials to increase their own personal security and implement a personal panic button they carry
with themselves. Because of the nature of the Red Stain’s modus operandi, the urban element, the
civilian population always present, the situation is complex to handle. Ten is sometimes on call
when a situation arises—a panic button is pressed—and he’s sent as a countermeasure. Twice of
those times he takes the decisive shot that helps save lives of everyone involved, the officials and
government security. His Academy nickname, “Sharpshooter”, starts spreading throughout the
Division.

Realizing their efforts thus far have been ineffective, a classified specialized task force, led by a
commander of the Counterterrorism Division, and gathering people from different branches of the
military, is put together to fight the neo-fascists.

One day, at the height of summer, Ten is summoned into a classified meeting. Heechul is there too.

He sits at the long table, turned to the big screen in the room.

“We are here to brief you on a mission you’ve been assigned to,” Mark Lee informs.

“Yes, sir.”

Mark makes a gesture, and someone turns the lights off. The screen starts up and shows a picture
of a warehouse.

“We’ve managed to track down one of the main safehouses of the Red Stain, located in the
outskirts of Syracuse.” A neighboring town to the Capital. “It’s under a front of a shell company,
which we are still trying to uncover. But that’s beside the point. After reconnaissance, we are sure
they keep one of their command centers here, along with supplies, weapons, food, even serving as a
place to house their operatives, because of the traffic we see around it.”

Mark clicks a button on his tablet and another picture pops up, a man on the grounds of the
warehouse. It was clearly taken from afar, a bit grainy. The man has fair skin and chestnut hair.
He’s smoking a cigarette.

“This is Byun Baekhyun,” he continues. “He’s the head of this center and holds a position of
command in the Red Stain. He studied at Peitharchía and pledged Strategy, but never accepted the
job offer he received upon graduation, and after that he disappeared from the grid. Upon
investigation, we found old posts on an online forum where he bashed refugees. His father was
killed in an armed robbery by the son of a southern refugee. The convicted criminal got time but
was released on probation. He was killed a week later, without any trace.”

Ten’s skin is crawling as he listens, but he keeps himself together.

“Our intelligence links Byun to not only perpetrating but propagating the ideology and recruiting
new members for the Red Stain,” Mark says. “Which is why we need to eliminate him. He’s too
valuable for their organization and won’t allow himself to be captured.”

Meaning, he’ll kill himself before that happens.

“That’s where you come in. You are tasked with eliminating him,” Mark states. “Not often Byun
gets out to the warehouse’s patio for a smoke. He doesn’t stay more than five minutes out, always
near the door. It’s in this window of opportunity that you must take him down.”

Ten’s fist closes involuntarily.

“Additional details,” he goes on.

Another picture pops up.

Ten freezes. He needs to blink before he looks at the image again, thinking his eyes are deceiving
him. The photograph is a bit hazy, but… there he is.

Taeyong.

With his blond hair combed like it used to be, a hardened expression on his face, his eyes… are
two lifeless gray orbs. It’s him, although he doesn’t look like himself. Like the man Ten knew and
loved and hugged. There is a stabbing pain in Ten’s gut, like knifes piercing him. He is physically
sick.

“This is Lee Taeyong. We don’t know exactly his position in the Red Stain, but he is often seen
talking to Byun in this area,” Mark confirms Ten’s suspicions. “He’s the only son of a business
magnate. We are still investigating if his father is involved in the Red Stain or not. But what we
know is that the Lee family suffered a car accident that was caused by a drunk immigrant. Lee
graduated from the Academy with top marks and applied to the Peitharchía, but rescinded his
application at the last minute. He’s been a ghost since then, not showing up in our system.”

Ten tries to stave off his nausea and the bile climbing up his throat. A car crash? Yes, Taeyong
told him about that. He never said it was because of an immigrant. Although all the information is
right in front of Ten very objectively, nothing makes sense to him. His Taeyong? A Red Stain
extremist? When they were together before? They loved each other. Taeyong loved him, a refugee.
Taeyong knows about Ten’s nationality. He was gentle, caring, loving. He told Ten he had nothing
against foreigners. How could he turn into something else so quickly? How could he join the very
thing that wants to destroy Ten? What changed Taeyong’s mind? Absolutely nothing about this
makes sense.

But Ten just stays very still and struggles to pay attention.

“Remember that the priority is Byun. But if you can take a second shot on Lee, you are authorized
to make the kill.”

Kill.

Kill Taeyong.

Ten is gonna be sick. He’s holding back a heave.

Mark goes over a couple more details and dismisses Ten and Heechul. When this happens, Ten
rushes to the nearest restroom and throws up. He’s shaking, sitting on the ground, with tears
running down his face. He tries not to make a sound, tries to get himself together.

“Ten?” Heechul calls.

Ten wipes his eyes and clears his throat. He steps out of the stall and heads towards the sink to
wash his hands.

“Hey,” he says in the most casual tone possible.

“Are you okay? I know this is your first high-value target mission.”

“I’m good.” It takes all his strength to smile faintly.

“Let’s go get them then.”

Ten nods and they leave.

They deploy in six hours. The waiting time slowly corrodes Ten’s insides. When he’s changing in
the locker, the ring hangs from his neck over his naked chest, a testimony of everything he once
treasured that now is being shattered. He examines the object in his hand and remembers the day
Taeyong gave it to him, how he explained it was a commitment band. Commitment. To this day,
Ten can’t seem to take it off. He finishes getting dressed.

It’s still night when a driver takes Ten and Heechul to the drop point five kilometers away from
their destiny. Dressed as civilians, they walk for an hour until they reach a building. They go to the
top and start setting up the equipment, assembling the rifle. Ten just goes through the motions
methodically, pushing his emotions away. He doesn’t let his mind wander there, to the possibility
that Taeyong will be in his crosshairs.

“Are you nervous?” Heechul asks, sounding worried and frowning. “You’re awfully quiet. I can do
this if you are struggling.”

“I’m just focused. I’ll do it,” Ten assures him.

Ten turns the visor of his baseball cap to the back and positions himself prone. Heechul puts a
tactical mesh veil over him and most of the rifle. The spotter takes his place beside him and covers
himself as well. Ten watches through the scope the empty patio of the warehouse as the first rays
of sunlight emerge.

Hours pass while all Ten does is wait and watch.

“Taeyong, walk me through the data,” Baekhyun is saying.

“Yes, sir.”

They sit in the small office inside the safehouse and work.

Baekhyun is the one Taeyong reports to. He comes to Syracuse to meet him often.

Taeyong and Baekhyun review the files for hours.

“I need a smoke,” Baekhyun says. “Let’s discuss the rest outside.”

They talk and walk out.

The door opens and immediately Ten’s gut twists, but his body and specially the hand near the
trigger stay still.

Taeyong exits to the patio. This is the first time Ten is seeing his ex-boyfriend in years. His heart
does a weird, erratic dance, his throat constricts. Taeyong’s body fits into Ten’s round zoomed-in
frame from hips to head. He’s dressed in civilian clothes, a black t-shirt, and jeans, a pistol on his
back hostler. Baekhyun exits right after him and takes a pack from his pocket, lighting up a
cigarette.
Heechul starts reciting the information about the surrounding conditions so Ten can adjust his
scope and take the shot.

Taeyong is stretching his legs, moving around, and putting his arms above his head. Baekhyun
takes a couple of steps and stops. Ten aims at him, at his heart. Heechul finishes the report. But
before Ten can adjust his final crosshairs and make sure he’ll hit Baekhyun, Taeyong steps in front
of him, blocking the view. Ten’s breath hitches.

The air feels heavy and harsh.

A minute passes.

“Ten?”

Seconds tick.

“This is it,” Heechul whispers. “Two kills, one shot.”

No response from Ten as his blood thunders in his ears.

“Ten, what are you doing?”

“Need a second,” Ten says in a strangled mutter. “Aiming.” A lie. They are right there; he can take
the shot and kill them both. The bullet will pierce Taeyong and hit Baekhyun in the heart.

Ten knows himself, knows Ghost, has the information, the targets aren’t moving. It’s the perfect
shot, the perfect opportunity.

He puts his index on the trigger. He finds the respiratory pause to make the shot.

His heart beats.

But he can’t.

The back of Taeyong’s head is too familiar even through a scope from kilometers away. It’s the
man he loved, loves, the man that kissed his lips and held him close and gave him comfort. And as
much as he tries to argue with himself that those things are irrelevant for his mission, the phantom
feeling of all of them still holds sway in Ten, even against all the years apart and with the possible
change of Taeyong’s heart and belief system.

“Ten!”

Baekhyun moves first and Ten follows him with his aim, the sweat in his temple falling into his
eyes. He begs that Taeyong stays still because in under the next seconds he’ll have to pull the
trigger, or they’ll miss the chance to take Baekhyun down.

One step towards the door.

Ten shoots.

Baekhyun falls.

Taeyong ducks down on instinct and rolls into the warehouse.

Ten immediately gets up and starts disassembling his gear, packing everything up. Time for
extraction. Ten and Heechul march out in silence, side by side, as inconspicuously as they can.
 After one and a half hour, they reach the spot. Minutes later, the car shows up to take them back to
headquarters. During this time, Heechul gives Ten strange looks. Ten begins to fear Heechul will
say something about what happened to their superiors. Ten will have to lie, say he couldn’t make
the two-kill shot for some reason, and he hopes they’ll believe him.

But when they report to Mark, Heechul says nothing. And Ten says nothing. They go to the
lockers to change out of their sweat-stained clothes. As Ten is ready to leave, Heechul puts a hand
on his shoulder and looks at him.

“I know what it’s like to choke,” the spotter says. “It’s okay. You made the shot. We completed
the mission.”

Ten nods.

When he arrives home, after a long shower, Ten crawls under the covers completely naked save for
the ring around his neck. He lays his head on the pillow as tears fill his eyes.

“Taeyong…” The name spills out of his lips as a trembling whimper.

Chapter End Notes

hands down one of my favorite taeten scenes to write was taeyong in ten's aim and ten
being unable to shoot him!

next chapter is the one you've all been waiting for...

ps: mark (and all of dream) are actually a couple of years older than taeten!
 did i paint your bluest skies the darkest gray?
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Taeyong is standing in one of the Red Stain cells, one arm crossed over his chest, one hand at his
chin.

“It was him.”

A picture of Ten and another man pop up on the large screen. Taeyong keeps his reaction in check,
face still.

“This is Skopós sniper Ten Lee. This is the spotter, Kim Heechul. We hacked into the satellite feed
from the day and found them on the roof of a building in the area.”

Of course. Out of all Skopós snipers, Ten was the one assigned to take Baekhyun down. And of
course he succeeded.

Another picture pops up, a view up from the area where the warehouse is. There is a red circle
marking where the sniper unit was. They were a good distance away from the warehouse. It wasn’t
an easy shot.

Taeyong squints, thinking, calculating in his head. He traces the path of the shot with his head,
recreates the scene from memory.

It can’t be…

“He’s a Dawi refugee.”

The people in the room scoff.

“We should kill him.”

Taeyong tenses.

“He’ll be dead before the war is over. And if he isn’t, he’ll be publicly executed just like the rest of
his filthy race.”

Even after years around these people, Taeyong still gets sick of hearing them talk. It takes every
fiber of his being not to do something, shut them up, put a bullet in all of them. What keeps him in
check is remembering his father’s threats, and how he needs to stay alive to protect Ten. If by some
stroke of misfortune these fanatics manage to overthrow the Corinth government—they won’t—
then Taeyong needs to be there to find Ten, Jimin and Jongdae, and get them out of the country. He
needs to keep surviving so Ten can live.

Taeyong can’t sleep. He tosses and turns and goes over the trajectory of the bullet, the shot that
took Baekhyun down, the positions of the two of them on the patio of the warehouse. Taeyong can
replay everything perfectly in his head, he has an excellent memory. And because of this, he knows
how many minutes they were there, and how Taeyong stood in between the barrel of the gun and
Baekhyun for a while. Maybe it wasn’t Ten’s mission to kill Taeyong, but he could have. He had
the chance. He waited for Baekhyun to move towards the door to take the shot. A kill made while
the target was moving, harder than when Baekhyun was just standing there with Taeyong in front
of him.

Had Ten spared Taeyong?

Through the scope, he knows for sure Ten recognized Taeyong there. The realization that Ten
knows about Taeyong’s involvement with the Red Stain hits him hard, with a wave of shame and
disgust, bile climbing his throat. Yes, Ten knows. He knows but chose not to take the shot that
would bring Taeyong down with Baekhyun. What was going through Ten’s head at the time?
Taeyong racks his brain, dying to know. If only he could talk to Ten…

No. It’s insanity. What if he’s followed?

He won’t. He can lose any tail.

Taeyong battles with himself.

His first years in the Red Stain were harder because he was gaining their trust. All recruits were
closely watched, not only him, but especially him because his father made sure of it. If Taeyong
stepped one single inch out of line, he would have been punished—worse, Ten would be punished.

But now, Taeyong has earned his keep. He has a clean record with the group, he’s an established
member. His father has relaxed the leash. Maybe… Maybe he can reach out to Ten. Undetected. He
just needs to put every single circumstance and detail in the balance, do the math. He needs to
make sure the plan is fail-proof—because if it’s not, it means death, or worse.

The thrill pumping in Taeyong’s blood is a high he hasn’t felt in a long time. He feels… alive. The
idea of seeing Ten again, face to face, in a non-violent setting, is electrifying. Well, non-violent if
Ten doesn’t shoot him on the spot. He’ll need to take that into account, since Ten knows Taeyong
is the enemy now.

Next winter will mark the five-year date of their breakup. Heartbreak anniversary. Taeyong
doesn’t even know what he’ll say if he sees him. Does Ten still have feelings for him? Is that why
he didn’t take the shot? Or was it just mercy because they share a past together?

Taeyong won’t know if he doesn’t try to meet Ten.

He gives up on falling asleep and begins to mentally sketch his plan. He has to report to his
superior every five days, but apart from that he’s free to roam Corinth doing his missions. In
between his tasks, he can find time to organize this. He needs to do a reconnaissance of Ten’s
apartment to see if it’s bugged or if there are cameras. He needs to keep tabs on Ten’s schedule. He
needs to check the electronic lock of Ten’s apartment for the model, so he can counter it with the
right electronic lockpick. He needs to map every camera in the neighborhood and try to memorize
at least the ones on Ten’s street. Among other things. He needs to still make it to his home to see
his mother otherwise she’ll be worried. She thinks he has a regular job.

It’s gonna take weeks, and it’s gonna be hard work, especially because he needs to do everything
covertly. But he has to try.

His revenge plan has been building for long enough.

Winter arrives. Through the last months, all Ten felt was numbness. He constantly dreams about
Taeyong, his blond hair stained red with blood, his cold body in Ten’s arms. He wakes up sweating
and panting. He’s afraid to talk to anyone about this, not even Jaehyun. Because he can’t share
classified information with his friend and because he’s ashamed about thinking of Taeyong at all.
He can’t talk to a counselor without risking them informing his superiors his ex-boyfriend is Red
Stain and that Ten almost failed a mission because of it.

Ten is tired and just goes through the motions of his life in survival mode.

As he walks inside his house, he turns on the light and shuts the door. Takes off his winter coat and
puts it on the wall hanger.

“Don’t scream.”

Taeyong is standing next to Ten, staring at the back of his head, waiting for his reaction.

Ten goes for the gun in his shoulder holster, and Taeyong predicted this could happen. He puts Ten
against the wall, trying not to apply all his strength or hurt him, but enough to pin him down. As
Ten’s chest hits the surface, his arm gets smacked in between his body and the wall, causing the
gun that was in his hand to fall to the ground.

“Ten—”

An elbow to Taeyong’s stomach makes him flinch and falter. Ten turns around and strikes him
across the face, so hard it makes Taeyong tumble back. But the pain doesn’t bother him, who just
readjusts his posture and methodically advances towards Ten with the intention to subdue him.
Ten’s fist is flying at his nose, but Taeyong ducks down and grabs Ten by the back of his thighs.
They fall to the ground, Ten on his back and Taeyong on top. Ten attempts to choke Taeyong by
passing his arm over and around his neck, but Taeyong manages to escape the grasp before it
tightens too much. Ten’s legs immediately rise—it’s easy for him who is flexible—one ankle
hooking on Taeyong’s nape, the other foot attempting to pass under his neck to lock him in
between them. Taeyong needs to fight the second leg as Ten pulls Taeyong’s head down. Ten is
strong, especially on his lower limbs. Taeyong strains himself, but he’s losing.

He doesn’t want to do this, but if he doesn’t, Ten will choke him until he passes out. So Taeyong
puts his hand behind his back and pulls his pistol from the holster. He points it at Ten’s temple and
immediately his ex-boyfriend lets up the force, relaxing his legs and arms until he’s sprawled on
the ground under Taeyong. They are both heaving, and it’s the first moment they actually look at
each other’s eyes, gray on dark brown. Taeyong’s mouth tastes of blood.

Taeyong is the one with the power, but he can’t move. Ten is right there, apart by almost nothing.
Taeyong’s mind goes blank and all he can do is peer into the man across from him.

The corner of his eyes catches a movement on his right. Ten’s hand is trying to reach for the pistol
that fell. Taeyong kicks it away. He finally can spell out words now.

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

Ten shuts his mouth, his Adam’s apple bobs up and down. “What do you want?”
“I wanted to see you,” Taeyong says quietly. “To talk.”

“About?” Ten’s face and voice are impassive.

Taeyong inhales deeply. “Did you spare my life?”

This question perturbs Ten, his eyelids flickering, the corner of his mouth twisting. They stay like
that, quiet, staring at each other.

“Tell me the truth,” Taeyong asks calmly.

“Yes.”

“Why?”

Ten’s body unsettles under Taeyong.

He doesn’t want to say the words.

He isn’t scared of Taeyong. Not after he looked at his face and saw what he saw. At first, yes, his
training and instincts kicked in with the panic of having an intruder in his home and continued until
Taeyong put a gun to his head. Surprisingly, when he did the most threatening thing he could, all
the fear from Ten’s body and mind were gone. Because he stopped and stared into Taeyong’s eyes
and recognized the same gray eyes that looked at him with love all those years ago. Somehow, the
same man is still there.

“Why should I tell you?” Ten diverts the topic, masking his emotions. “You broke up with me.
You disappeared. You joined the Red Stain. And now you’re here. For what? Because I showed
you mercy?”

Taeyong’s bottom lip quivers slightly. His lip and chin are stained with blood from the blow Ten
gave him across the mouth.

“If you leave, I won’t report what happened to my superiors,” Ten says. “Just leave, Taeyong.”

He’s trying to be rational about it. What is he gonna say? That he still loves him? What would be
the point? Taeyong made his choices.

Taeyong leans back on his haunches. Ten sits up. They keep their eyes on each other while they
stand slowly, assessing one another, tension still brimming in the air between them.

But even now, as he asked Taeyong to leave, Ten wants him to stay. Even as he faces a known
criminal, Ten’s resolve waivers. Because it’s Taeyong. His Taeyong. Ten opens his mouth—

Of course. Ten doesn’t love him. Ten moved on. Ten is happy without him. What was Taeyong
thinking? How delusional is he? Sparing Taeyong’s life meant nothing. Ten was just being
 merciful, because he is a decent human being with real emotions. And shooting his ex, no matter
how stupid the ex in question may be, was out of the question for him.

Taeyong just drinks in the image of this twenty-five-year-old Ten in front of him for a couple of
minutes, the gun on his hand hanging at his side. Taeyong glances him up and down, committing
this image to memory. If Ten wants him gone, he’ll leave him alone. Ten parts his lips. Taeyong is
about to say something when he spots it.

Outrage twirls in Taeyong’s gut like a poison. His throat closes, and it’s hard to breathe. Ten must
see something in his face because he motions to move back. Taeyong raises the gun’s barrel at
Ten’s face and starts advancing until Ten hits the foot of the bed and falls sitting on it. He can see
his hands have started to shake.

Taeyong stretches out his arm and reaches for Ten’s neck. With sure fingers, he pulls out a white
gold string. And it reveals a diamond ring hanging from it. The commitment band Taeyong gave
him all those years ago. He glances at it, then back at Ten’s face, whose eyes are watering.

“Why do you still have this?” Taeyong asks in a low, faltering voice.

Ten is trembling as he tries to hold the tears in. He gulps, not knowing what to say. Because saying
it out loud means admitting that he’s been holding onto Taeyong for all these years just like he’s
been holding onto the one remanent token of their love—the only thing he could keep of them,
because it’s the only thing Taeyong left behind.

“Why did you lie to me?” When Taeyong asks this, Ten can hear the pain in his voice.

“Why do you care?” Ten cries, his emotions bubbling to the surface finally. “You fucking left.
You left me.”

And the statement carries all the heartache and loneliness of Taeyong’s absence and betrayal, of
Ten having to watch him leave that hotel room that fateful day. The statement begs—no,
demands—answers for questions Ten never got to ask. And all these questions flood Ten’s mind, a
billion things at once so fast he is drowning in them.

Taeyong lets go of the ring.

“Why are you here?” is what Ten ultimately asks.

“Because I fucking love you.”

Chapter End Notes

idk what's more sexy: taeyong replaying the trajectory of the bullet and realizing ten
could have shot him but didnt, or him saying "i fucking love you"

discuss in the comments pls

 what died didn’t stay dead, you’re alive, you’re alive in my head
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“Because I fucking love you.”

As Taeyong says the words, the world seems to stop. It drowns out all the noise, all the
movements. Ten feels stuck in place, seated on his bed facing his ex-boyfriend after all this time, a
gun still in his face.

“I have thought about you every day for five years,” Taeyong continues. His hand is shaking, his
gray eyes are wet. “And when I thought maybe you haven’t moved on, because you spared my life,
I should at least try to talk to you.”

Ten’s heartbeat roars. Taeyong loves him. After all this time. He never forgot him.

Fuck it. Fuck everything else outside this room.

Ten stands. He secures Taeyong’s wrist and pushes it down as he closes the distance between
them. He twists the gun away from Taeyong’s grip, who allows it, and it falls on the floor with a
loud clank. Ten slowly takes Taeyong’s hands and places it on his waist as he puts their noses and
bodies together, all the while tears stream down his eyes, because he’s forgone holding them back
any longer. Their breaths mingle in that familiar proximity, that space carved out of tenderness and
raw intimacy.

Taeyong is warm, his embrace is firm, just as he used to be. Ten wonders if time really passed,
because this is so familiar. Ten closes the distance between their mouths. Taeyong’s lips taste like
blood and all the suns in the universe.

Taeyong can’t process the fact that Ten just kissed him. He stands there, with his hands on Ten’s
waist, lips to lips, Ten’s palms on his arms. Ten doesn’t move much. It’s just a light touch.

Ten pulls back a bit and they look at each other. Both their faces are wet with tears. Their eyes
carry a thousand galaxies that scream the same things. There is no need for words. Time turns back
and they are young adults again. Taeyong knows what Ten wants now. Ten knows what Taeyong
wants too.

Their mouths clash brutally, tongues pressing together. Taeyong hugs Ten so hard against him it
might hurt, their bodies coming flush. Ten’s hand snatches his blond hair, the force enough to be
borderline painful. Their kiss is wild and harsh, thirsting, violent. They kiss like the world is falling
apart all around them, burning to the ground. It says all the things that five years of silence didn’t.
They become breathless quickly and hearing Ten gasp for the first time in so long stokes an
unsurmountable crave inside Taeyong.

Without stopping the high-paced kiss, Ten pushes Taeyong’s coat to the ground, and he does the
same for Ten’s navy blazer. Taeyong’s heart lurches at the realization that Ten wants him back,
still, even after everything that has kept them apart. Taeyong takes off Ten’s shoulder holster. Ten
grabs the hem of Taeyong t-shirt and sweater and yanks it up, revealing his chest. They move their
hands to each other’s buckles and zippers with eager and deft fingers, as they step out of their
shoes. Ten’s dress pants slide down his legs after it’s opened.

“A—ah!” Taeyong cries out as Ten cups his erection over his underwear, lips and teeth dragging to
his neck. “Fuck, Ten—”

The knowing and ruthless way Ten touches him sends Taeyong’s mind reeling, his flesh dripping
with arousal. Taeyong pushes his own baggy jeans, and they fall down to his ankles. With one
hand, he grips Ten’s asscheek, while the other finds Ten’s cock. A shiver runs through Taeyong
when he feels the hardness in his palm. He needs Ten now.

Taeyong moves to rip Ten’s shirt open, buttons flying away all around them. The gleaming ring
hangs around Ten’s neck and against his sternum. Ten removes his shirt and pushes his own
underwear down. Taeyong grabs Ten by the back of his thighs and lifts him up easily as their lips
meet again, Ten wrapping his arms around Taeyong’s neck. Taeyong puts his knee on the bed, then
the other, and moves until the middle, lying Ten there and pressing himself on top of him. Taeyong
kisses down Ten’s neck with his tongue and teeth, sucking marks into the skin. Ten takes his sock
off. His nails dig into Taeyong’s back as he kisses down to Ten’s nipple, making him moan.

“Be with me,” Ten whimpers.

“Yes,” Taeyong answers before kissing Ten on the lips.

Their tongues dance together relentlessly as Taeyong grasps Ten’s face with his hand. He pushes
their hips together, erections in between them squeezed by their bodies. It brings some relief to the
strain Taeyong feels on his cock. He senses Ten move his arm away, and stops kissing him,
understanding Ten is trying to reach for the bedside table. Taeyong rolls to the side giving Ten
room to move, and while Ten rummages through the drawer Taeyong removes the last pieces of
his clothes, underwear and socks. They are entirely bare with each other in bed after so long, and
Taeyong’s mind is reeling from it all. He doesn’t know which part of Ten to look at—he wants it
all at once, drink in everything about his lover.

Ten returns and lies on his back again, a bottle of lube in his hand. He opens it and turns it upside
down. Taeyong offers his left hand, and it’s coated with the liquid. Taeyong positions himself
between Ten’s legs, which spread open to welcome him.

They lock eyes as Taeyong’s fingers reach Ten’s rim. Ten gasps when Taeyong moves circles
against it, both of them breathing long and heavy. Ten cups Taeyong’s face in a gesture so tender it
ruptures his chest, makes him want to weep again. He moves his head to kiss Ten’s palm, and
when he looks at him again, Ten is smiling. Taeyong’s eyes start to water. He feels choked,
wanting to say a thousand words but unable to voice them. Ten combs through his blond hair
affectionately. When Taeyong pushes two fingers inside him, Ten shuts his eyes and bites his
lower lip.

Taeyong massages him slowly, stretching him up, admiring Ten’s beauty under him. He looks the
same but matured, as perfect as ever, his black bangs parted in the middle falling to the sides of his
face. Taeyong shifts his fingers and Ten produces a sweet, small moan. Taeyong pushes that spot
again and Ten moans one more time. It’s gorgeous, everything about him, his face, his body, his
sounds.

Ten grabs the bottle of lube and offers it again. Taeyong removes his fingers and receives another
load of liquid, spreading it on his cock. Ten puts the bottle aside and glances back at Taeyong, who
understands everything he wants without words. He positions himself on top of Ten, hand at the
hilt of his cock.

Looking into each other’s eyes, Taeyong pushes himself inside Ten.

Here they are, connected for the first time like this—it’s otherworldly. A whine escapes Ten’s lips.
Taeyong doesn’t want to take his eyes off Ten’s face, he wants to freeze this moment forever. The
tightness makes him intoxicated. He doesn’t know about Ten, but he hasn’t had sex like this in
years. More importantly, they never had sex like this.

When Taeyong bottoms out, he stops and shuts his eyes for a second, letting out a shuddering
breath. He caresses the top of Ten’s head and deposits slow kisses all over his face, while Ten
holds him tight in the embrace, fingers digging into his back. Taeyong inhales Ten’s scent, he feels
him with every inch of his skin, with every sense, aware of every small detail, of the rhythm of his
breath, of his body heat, of the dark brown of his eyes, the shape of his lips.

Taeyong thrusts in and out. It starts slowly, while they stare at each other. Ten’s mouth falls open
as his noises increase, his nails sinking into Taeyong’s skin. And he welcomes that slight pain
eagerly, the marks of Ten’s desire for him. Ten licks Taeyong’s lips boldly, and he joins their
tongues deeply.

In between kisses and gasps, they make love.

Their bodies grow searing, the pace increases. Taeyong watches Ten’s face transform with lust and
fucks him harder, wanting to take him there, wanting nothing more than to hear the sounds of
Ten’s pleasure.

“A—ahh!” Ten moans, louder and louder.

Panting, Taeyong moves against him faster, the bed under them creaking, headboard hitting against
the wall.

“Taeyong—” Ten says in a strangled cry, as Taeyong feels a wetness in between them. His eyes
flick down at it to see Ten’s cock spilling cum, and the image tilts Taeyong over to his own
shuddering orgasm.

They are sweaty and heaving after, when Taeyong drops his body on Ten’s, molding like they are
one. They are one. The world around them disappears, and it’s only the two of them amidst the
darkness, two shining stars.

Here, again in the warmth of Ten’s arms, the world is not such a cold place.

When Taeyong finally rolls away from Ten, his body feels like it weights tons. Ten gets tissues
from the bedside table and cleans himself, then Taeyong. They move under the covers, side by
side, turned to each other. Taeyong places his hand on Ten’s waist, Ten runs a hand through
Taeyong’s hair. They stay silent. Taeyong becomes sleepy. He doesn’t want to give into it, wants
to stay present with Ten as much as possible. But he’s never felt this relaxed since he left Ten’s
side all those years ago. He has never had a peaceful night of sleep since then. And now, beside
Ten, all he feels is comfort and peace and belonging.

“I love you.”

The words come out of Ten’s mouth as a whisper.

It takes a second of Taeyong looking from one dark brown eye to the other before he reacts.
 An emotion climbs to his throat, cutting the air supply out of him. He lets out a choked sob and
starts to weep, his chest and back jerking with the force of it.

Ten pulls him close into his arms, and Taeyong can hear his cries too.

They cry themselves to sleep.

When Taeyong wakes up, he has his head on Ten’s chest. He blinks and moves slowly to look at
him. Ten is awake.

“How much did I sleep?” Taeyong whispers in a hoarse voice.

“Just half an hour.”

Taeyong kisses Ten softly.

“Bathroom,” he says and gets up, trailing naked to the adjacent room.

After he washes his hands, Taeyong goes back to bed, where Ten is sitting against the headboard,
the covers up to his belly. Taeyong takes the spot beside him.

“We should talk,” he says.

Taeyong has so much to explain. He’ll tell Ten everything. He’ll kneel and beg for forgiveness.

“We should.”

The cold barrel of a gun touches Taeyong’s abdomen.

Chapter End Notes

i always wanted to write a shirt being ripped open and this was the perfect opportunity
lmao

taeten fuck as hard as they fight they deserve after all the years apart!!!
 did i close my fist around something delicate? did i shatter you?
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten has a gun to Taeyong’s stomach.

As they laid together, Ten never felt so complete. When Taeyong held him in his arms and fucked
into him, the realization that Ten still loved him as violently as he once did hit him hard. Maybe he
loves Taeyong even more, because as he sees him now sitting in front of him all he wants is to put
his gun down and get into his embrace. Having Taeyong back and here feels like a dream.

But this dream is a cruel taunt.

Taeyong left him behind and joined the Red Stain. With the information Ten has, it doesn’t make
sense, but it’s still a fact. Taeyong is the enemy. Even if he’s loves Ten and never stopped, even if
he’s magically returned to his life and arms. He’s seen the way Taeyong looked at him just now,
how he touched and fucked him, how he wept in his arms. There are some things that can’t be
faked, Ten reasons with himself. Taeyong is no award-winning actor and Ten doubts he took up
acting in the past five years while simultaneously being a part of an extremist group. Either the
entirety of their relationship has been a ruse, or Taeyong really still loves him. And the first
alternative sounds unreasonable to Ten. Why would Taeyong go out of his way to pursue Ten,
when he was just a nobody back in the Academy? Ten had no utilitarian value in this scenario,
there was nothing to gain from tricking eighteen-year-old Ten. Now, yes, maybe Ten has some
value because he’s Skopós. But still, he’s just a sniper, not an intelligence officer.

In the end, what made Ten pick up the gun and point at Taeyong was that it doesn’t matter if they
love each other and that they just had the most mind-blowing sex. Taeyong is Red Stain and Ten is
Skópos.

“Ten…” he trails off, his brows furrowing.

“I’m gonna need you to put your clothes back on,” Ten says, keeping his voice steady.

“I just need to talk to you,” Taeyong begs, his gray eyes round. “Before anything else happens.”

Ten ponders.

“You can start,” he says, “by telling me why you joined the Red Stain.”

Taeyong breathes in deep.

“My sister died in a car crash,” he says. “As you already know. It was an immigrant drunk driver
that hit us.”

Ten nods. He already knows this part, but he lets Taeyong say everything.

“After that, my father… changed. I knew he hated foreigners because of what happened, but I
didn’t know how deep it was. Until he told me he was funding the Red Stain and that I would have
to join it.”

“So it never bothered you I am Dawi?” Ten asks because he really needs to hear it.
Taeyong shakes his head. “The person that killed my sister was drunk. It doesn’t matter where he
was born.”

Ten presses on. “You still joined the Red Stain. Why?”

“Because my father threatened you,” Taeyong says weakly. “And your family.”

Ten’s pulse spikes, but he keeps his semblant calm. “What do you mean?”

“He rescinded my application from the Peitharchía, telling me he had other plans for me. That if I
didn’t comply, he would get your parents fired and they wouldn’t be able to get a job,” Taeyong
explains. “Then he sent me away to train under the Red Stain. I had no idea what was happening
until I got there.”

Ten listens carefully, as panic pools in his chest.

“When I came back, he revealed he knew about your nationality all along. That I had to break up
with you and do what he wanted. He said if I didn’t, he wouldn’t kill you,” Taeyong gulps. “He
would keep you alive and make me watch as…” Taeyong trails off and lowers his eyes.

Ten’s mouth is dry and bitter, a nausea rising from his gut.

“I didn’t have a choice. I didn’t have proof to take to the authorities, except my word. It was either
do what my father demanded of me, or you would end up in harm’s way,” Taeyong says. “I’ve
been through hell. I’ve been beaten into a pulp. I’ve been forced to go against my morals. But the
worst part was being away from you.”

Ten’s eyes are burning.

“I love you, Ten,” Taeyong says, looking at him again with affectionate but sad eyes. “I have not
stopped loving you all this time. I tried forgetting you, moving on, but I didn’t.”

“Why now?” Ten asks with an unsteady voice.

“Because you spared my life when you didn’t have to. It got me wondering if you still loved me,
too. I thought you had moved on, so I wasn’t going to go after you. And it’s the first time I felt safe
reaching out, knowing one hundred percent I could do it without putting your life at risk,” he
explains. “And now, the circumstances have changed.”

“How?”

“I have proof,” Taeyong says. “I spent years surveilling my father. His meetings with the Red
Stain, his movements, his routine. I have pictures, dates, locations. A pile of things to use against
him, proof enough to land him in jail, maybe even earn a death-sentence. Without him, the Red
Stain will crumble. He’s the one funding them. I also have almost all Red Stain safehouses
committed to memory. I have photos and names of all the Red Stain operatives I have ever met. If I
hand this to the government, maybe they can do something about it.”

Taeyong just watches Ten carefully.

“Bringing my father down is the only way you’ll be safe.”

Ten finally lowers his pistol, putting it over the sheets. He sighs deeply.

“You’ve been beaten?” Ten asks, still disturbed by that idea.

Taeyong rolls his neck. “We don’t have to talk about that.”

Ten looks at Taeyong’s body. There is a scar on his shoulder. He moves to straddle Taeyong’s lap,
who puts his hands on his waist. Ten touches the rough tissue with his fingertips.

“Where did you get this? Where you shot?”

“Yeah. By you.”

“What?”

Taeyong smiles. “That time you were ambushed while sniping. It was me who fled. I was there. I
made the other guy miss his shot.”

Ten’s jaw has dropped. “Taeyong… I—I shot you?!”

“You did, Sharpshooter.” He chuckles softly.

“I can’t believe it. How are you laughing about this?” Ten says, but Taeyong’s reaction makes the
heaviness in his mind and heart lighter.

“It was nothing,” Taeyong says, palms rubbing Ten’s back. “It’s a reminder of you. Literally
lodged in my flesh.”

Ten shakes his head and laughs. “That’s so twisted.”

“I know. I am twisted.”

Ten smiles, his hands stroking Taeyong’s blond hair. He is so beautiful now, even after everything
that he went through. The way he looks at Ten, with loving adoration, is the same as it was. The
way the touches Ten, sometimes softly sometimes harshly, is also the same. It’s like time hasn’t
passed because they fit together perfectly. Ten leans in and joins their lips. Taeyong’s arms tighten
around him, their chests coming flush, naked against each other. Their tongues meet and Ten
increases the intensity, suddenly feeling very enthusiastic about kissing his ex-boyfriend. Well, not
that much of an ex anymore, he guesses. He can feel Taeyong’s cock hardening against his
asscheek and Ten moves his hips to grind against it. Taeyong’s fingertips dig into his flesh as he
grunts.

They keep kissing, all the desire that exists between them growing with their passion, ignoring
every wrong turn, every mistake, every mile and day apart, every inch of untouched skin, every
sunrise and sunset that they didn’t get to share. For everything that wasn’t, now they simply are.

“Ten.” A small whisper sends a shiver through him.

Taeyong kisses down his neck and Ten whimpers, keeping on moving his hips against him.
Taeyong’s hand dips to Ten’s ass and grips it tightly, his tongue dancing on Ten’s collarbone. At
this point, Ten is hard too. He moves out of Taeyong’s lap to reach for the lube that they left on the
bed. He straddles him back and pours the liquid on his palm, stroking Taeyong’s length up and
down. Then he applies some more on his rim, pushing two fingers in unceremoniously, stretching
himself quickly. He wipes his hand on the sheets before repositioning himself on top of Taeyong.

He sinks onto Taeyong’s cock as they look at each other, their mouths hanging open, letting out
groans. Taeyong’s hand slides up his spine until the roots of Ten’s hair and clutches them strongly.
Ten whines. He starts humping on Taeyong’s lap, enjoying the girth in him make his hole taut. It
feels amazing, much more than his own fingers when he plays with himself. Taeyong pulls back on
Ten’s hair and lavishes his neck with wilts and bites. Ten ups the speed, the pounding inside him
stoking the pleasure that builds in his core.

“Taeyong…” Ten pants his name. Taeyong grunts. “So close.”

“Look at me,” he calls out.

Ten does, their noses touching, Taeyong grabbing his asscheeks with his big hands.

“I wanna watch you,” Taeyong whispers.

Ten lets out a long whine, going faster, chasing his high, his fingernails digging into Taeyong’s
shoulders. His loins are exploding with wildfire, the pressure in his spot overwhelming.

“Ahh!” Ten moans loudly as the rush of bliss courses through his blood, his cock spilling onto
Taeyong’s belly.

Taeyong moans along as Ten trembles on top of him. Then it stops. They are panting and sweaty.
They kiss softly before Ten moves away, grabbing tissues to clean them both.

They lie down, side by side.

“I love you,” Ten whispers.

Taeyong smiles sweetly. “I love you too. So much.”

Ten sighs. “What do we do now?”

They can’t escape the fact that they are in trouble. Taeyong’s father is powerful and doesn’t want
them to be together. Taeyong is wanted by the State for criminal activities.

Taeyong caresses his cheek. “Maybe it’s time I reach out to the Counterterrorism Division with the
information I have. Try to get immunity, a deal, out of it.”

“I don’t want you to go to prison,” Ten says, fearful.

“Neither do I. But I might have to. Going to the authorities is the only way out of this that I can
see.”

Ten huddles closer and nuzzles his nose on Taeyong’s chest, who holds him back tightly.

“How many hours do we have?” Ten asks.

“Before sunrise.”

They don’t sleep. They spend the night in each other’s arms, fucking away all the loneliness that
settled in their bones throughout the years. They complete.

When Taeyong finally has to leave, with the promise that he’ll come back when he’s organized all
the information so he can turn himself in, Ten can’t help but hide in between his sheets and cry into
the pillows that smell of Taeyong. He cries because he’s happy to have Taeyong back, but also out
of fear of losing him again. He misses him the minute he goes through the door. He doesn’t want to
have to live without him any longer. Taeyong is the thing that has been missing from his life all
this time.
Chapter End Notes

taeyong did a uno reverse on the red stain! they trained him to be a spy? he spied on
them LMAOOOO GO TAEYONG!!!!
 and it gets colder and colder when the sun goes down
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

When Ten wakes up to an empty bed, he feels lonelier than he has in all these years. He can’t help
but start to cry with Taeyong’s absence. He burrows his face on the pillow Taeyong used, trying to
catch remnants of his scent. He would stay there all day if he didn’t have to go to work. So he gets
up and showers, scrubbing away the traces of Taeyong from his body. The bite marks and wilts are
still covering skin though, and he treasures it as signs of their lovemaking.

All he needs to do is wait now. Wait for Taeyong to contact him again, so they can work on how
he’ll turn himself in to the authorities. But Ten doesn’t know when that will happen. They can’t
communicate through their phones when they are being watched.

After Ten gets home from work, it doesn’t take long for someone to knock on his door. It’s
Jaehyun. They greet and his friend steps into the kitchen.

“Do you want something to drink?” Ten offers.

“No.” Jaehyun has a knowing smile on his face.

“What?” Ten asks.

“Ten. Don’t you have something you wanna tell me?” He pokes Ten’s waist softly.

Ten blushes. “What do you mean?”

“Well. You are very loud when you are having sex,” Jaehyun says, shrugging casually.

Ten purses his lips, panicking. Jaehyun giggles.

“I mean, it’s fine if you don’t wanna tell me. But I could hear you were having lots of fun.”

“I-I guess I was.”

“Who is he? Or she,” Jaehyun asks.

Ten gulps. “Promise me you’ll keep this between us. Not even Doyoung can know.”

Jaehyun furrows his brow. “Sure.”

“It’s… It’s Taeyong.”

Jaehyun’s jaw drops. It takes him a moment to react.

“How?” he asks.

“He showed up unannounced. He scared me, so we struggled. He pulled a gun at me.”

“Ten!” Jaehyun yelps, coming closer and putting his hands on Ten’s arms. “Are you okay?”

His friend looks a mix of confused and upset. Ten nods.

“I’m fine, we… we ended up sleeping together.”

Jaehyun stares at him one eye to the other, processing. “What did he want?”

“He wanted to tell me why he disappeared all those years ago,” Ten says. “It’s bad, Jaehyun. I
can’t tell you. But it’s not his fault.”

Jaehyun gapes at him before pulling Ten into a hug.

“I missed him so much,” Ten vents. “I’m so scared.”

“It’s okay.” Jaehyun rubs his back up and down. “I’m here.”

They end up spending some time together. Ten can’t really disclose what happened to Taeyong.
It’s not safe for Jaehyun to know, not yet. And Taeyong should be the one to explain the truth to
him and Doyoung.

Days pass as Taeyong needs to focus on the jobs given by the Red Stain. Whenever he gets a
chance, he organizes all the information he has on them in a pen drive. Throughout the years, he
stored all of it into an air-gapped laptop, one that never connected to the internet. When his days
off arrive, he heads to Ten’s house. He lets himself in with the electronic lockpick, doesn’t turn on
the lights. Taeyong sits in the kitchen and waits, hand over the table, fingers tapping rhythmically.

He looks up when the door opens. Ten comes in, oblivious, switching on the lights. He turns to
Taeyong and jolts, hand flying to the handle of his gun.

“Shit, you scared me,” Ten says and sighs relieved.

Taeyong can’t hold back a smirk as he sees Ten again. When he sees the love of his life, everything
else pales in comparison. The life-threatening danger he is in, the hurt of all the absence they
endured, the sleepless nights, the dull burns he was subjected to. Everything takes a backseat. He
gets up and trails towards him, putting Ten against the door and kissing him. Ten grabs him by the
waist.

“I missed you,” Taeyong whispers against his lips.

“I missed you too.”

They kiss again, licking into each other’s mouth languidly. Taeyong presses their bodies together
and Ten gasps quietly. He kisses down Ten’s neck, palms digging into his hips.

“Taeyong…” he whispers, hands sliding under his t-shirt, searching for skin.

Ten pushes Taeyong towards the bed, their clothes falling on the ground on their way there. Palms
dig into heated flesh as they lie down. Ten reaches for the bottle of lube and soon Taeyong is two
fingers deep into him, pulling moans.

“I’m ready,” Ten exhales weakly.

Taeyong pushes inside and they moan together, looking into each other’s eyes. Taeyong picks up
the pace quickly, both of them eager. He grabs Ten by the hips, tilting them up, and fucks him
hard. Ten calls his name in strangled whines over and over, and Taeyong wants nothing but to melt
into this feeling of being together.
“Cumming, ahh—” Ten throws his head back and Taeyong peaks with him, hammering him
through their orgasms.

They fall into each other after, panting and sweaty. They stroke one another’s skin and hair
affectionately.

“Are you ready?” Ten asks.

Taeyong nods.

“How are we going to do this?” Ten wonders.

“I think we should walk into the Division together. Me in a disguise, maybe wearing your clothes.”

“When they scan your fingerprint, they’ll immediately know you are entering the building,” Ten
says, brow furrowed.

“I know. We just gotta hope they let me inside before they ambush me,” Taeyong says.

He’s counting on it. Because if he’s caught in an open space, the Red Stain will inevitably know
what he did.

Taeyong caresses Ten’s cheek. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Of course I worry.” Ten pouts slightly.

Taeyong smiles and kisses him. “Everything will be okay. This hell will be over. I promise.”

Ten sighs and joins their lips. “Before anything happens, fuck me again.”

“Gladly.” Taeyong chuckles.

They kiss and embrace. Taeyong puts Ten on all four and takes him like that, griping him by the
hips and pounding into him brutally while loud moans sing out of Ten’s throat.

When they sleep, Taeyong does this naked, which is unusual for him after years of sleeping with
regular clothes on, sometimes even shoes. But beside Ten he feels calm enough for that.

They wake up the next day and shower, have some simple breakfast, before Taeyong dresses in
Ten’s clothes and hides his blond hair under a beanie. He puts on sunglasses and a facemask,
leaving his gun at Ten’s house—his phone is still back in his own apartment so he can’t be tracked.
Ten dresses as he usually does for work, a crisp suit with a shirt, his shoulder holster under the
blazer. They get their stories straight.

As inconspicuously as they can, they walk to the Counterterrorism Division and get in line when
they arrive at the gates. Surprisingly, Taeyong isn’t nervous. After years of living on edge, he
finally gets to accomplish the mission he set for himself. He will take his father down along with
the Red Stain. He will keep Ten safe forever.

Ten goes in front, getting scanned in and easily crossing the threshold. Taeyong is scanned next,
and nothing happens. He is let inside. Taeyong and Ten walk side by side to the doors the lead to
the building.

The entrance is large and bright. They keep walking.

Suddenly, a group of armed people in black uniforms surrounds them, pistols at the ready and
pointing at them.

“On your knees,” one of them says. “Hands on your head.”

Taeyong obeys slowly.

Someone taps him down for weapons, then his wrists are put behind his back and handcuffed.

A hood is put over his head and everything goes black.

“What the hell is going on?” Mark asks.

Ten is sitting down at an office, hands clasped together, his leg wobbling nervously.

“Taeyong reached out to me,” he explains. “He wants to surrender himself. He has information on
the Red Stain that will help take them down.”

“When did this happen?”

“Days ago.”

“You should have informed us the minute he contacted you,” Mark scolds him.

“I know. But he needed time to gather everything. Just hear him out, please,” Ten pleads.

Mark sighs and rubs the bridge of his nose.

“We will proceed with interrogation,” he says. “But you’ll be interrogated, too.”

Ten nods.

Taeyong is in a bare square room with a mirror, sitting at a desk, his hands cuffed behind his back.
He lost track of time. The door opens, and a man walks in, carrying a tablet. He’s wearing a suit,
has short black hair.

“Lee Taeyong,” he says. “I’m Huang Renjun.” He sits in front of Taeyong.

“Good morning,” Taeyong says casually.

Renjun clicks on the tablet a couple of times, takes a pack of smokes from the inner pocket of his
blazer, and lights up a cigarette.

“So. Are we doing this the hard or the easy way?” Renjun asks, blowing out smoke.

“Any way you prefer.”

They just stare at each other, emotionless, for a moment.

“We know you are Red Stain,” Renjun says.

Taeyong nods. “I am.”

“You were in possession of pen drives. We are scanning them now.”

“Good.”

“What is it that you plan to achieve, Mr. Lee?”

“I have information on the Red Stain that isn’t in those files I brought,” he says.

“Where is it?”

“In my head.”

Renjun hums, inhaling his cigarette.

“I am hoping to trade what I know and brought for immunity.”

Renjun smiles and puts the cigarette off on the metal table.

“That’s not so easy.”

“I know,” Taeyong says. “But helping to take down an organization like the Red Stain has to
render me something.”

“You know we can just make you talk,” Renjun says nonchalantly, waving his hand around. “You
aren’t officially in this building, Mr. Lee. We can take you to a black site. It’s not unprecedented
for criminals like you.”

Yes. Captured terrorists often lost their civil rights to be prosecuted fairly.

But Taeyong just smirks. “Nothing you do to me will surpass what the Red Stain did.”

Renjun crosses his arms over his chest, looking amused.

“What did they do to you?”

“Hell doesn’t describe it.”

“Then why did you join them?”

“I was forced into it.”

“How?”

“Threats of violence against the one I loved.”

Renjun raises an eyebrow. “Officer Ten Lee?”

They are putting the puzzle together. Taeyong nods.

“I see.”

“Sir, I spent years collecting data, biding my time,” Taeyong says, wanting to just be upfront.
“Now I have it. I brought it to you. I know it doesn’t erase the fact that I did collect intel for the
 Red Stain all this time. But I was never part of their violent attacks. I send over warning of their
bomb attacks. And I saved two Skopós officers once.”

Renjun rubs his chin.

“I will talk to my superior,” he says. “And then we’ll decide how to act.”

With that, he leaves with his tablet. Taeyong exhales deeply and looks up, wishing for things to
work themselves out.

Chapter End Notes

reminder that all of dream are a couple years older than taeten!

oh gosh this fic is almost over besties!!!!

 and when i was shipwrecked i thought of you
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“So you had a romantic relationship with Lee Taeyong during the Academy?” Mark asks as he
looks down at a tablet.

“Yes.” Ten gulps.

“And you didn’t disclose this when you were briefed on the Byun mission.”

“I didn’t know I had to.” It’s true. “There was the possibility that Taeyong wouldn’t be there,
anyway. I completed my assignment regardless.”

Mark sighs. “Ten, you have to understand you have put us in a difficult position now. You’ve
fraternized with a known terrorist and didn’t inform any superior officer.”

“I know. But he wanted to come forward himself, and I trusted he would,” Ten explains. “And he
did. He’s here. He brought the intel to take down Lee Seojun.”

“Taeyong’s father?” Mark asks.

“Yes. He’s the one funding the Red Stain.”

Mark studies Ten.

“I will answer anything you want,” Ten pleads. “Every detail you need.”

“You can start by recounting everything from the moment you met,” Mark says, crossing his
fingers over the table.

So Ten does. He starts from the beginning, with as much detail as he can, and he remembers a lot.
How they started talking, their first dates, their first kiss, the way they bonded, even conversations
they had, until the day Taeyong broke up with him, what words he used exactly. Then he goes on to
talk briefly about his time at the Peitharchía and his job at the Division, which eventually leads to
Ten confessing he spared Taeyong’s life on the Byun mission, how he had him in his crosshairs but
didn’t take the shot that would kill Byun and Taeyong. He explains how this led Taeyong to reach
out to him finally, and it was time to turn himself in.

Ten is parched when he finishes the tale, and drinks from the glass of water that is on the table.

“I understand,” Mark says. “I will go over everything you said and see what Renjun got out of
Taeyong. Then I will talk to my superior about your punishment.”

Ten nods, resigned. He knows he won’t go unscathed after everything that happened.

Hours pass as Ten waits. He’s kept in the same room all day until it’s dark outside. At least he has
access to water, bathroom, and food someone brings him eventually, but he doubts Taeyong is
receiving the same treatment. He bites his nails red, paces around the space, sits and stands
alternatively. His phone was taken away from him, so it’s not like he can distract himself. He just
worries about Taeyong, wishes to see and touch him and make sure he’s okay.
Taeyong has another round of interrogation with Renjun. This time, the focus is not on the Red
Stain, but on his relationship with Ten. Renjun asks him to describe their history from the start, and
probes for further details as Taeyong goes on. He answers everything as best as he can. Renjun
seems particularly interested in the time Taeyong prevented Ten and Heechul from being
ambushed. A stroll down memory lane.

No one offers him water or food, but he’s used to going days without.

Renjun leaves again and disappears for a while. Taeyong tries to stretch, since he’s getting sore
from sitting in the same position for so long.

When Renjun returns, he is accompanied by someone else, who’s carrying a tablet.

“This is Lee Jeno.”

Taeyong nods. The officers sit.

“Mr. Lee, we went over the information on your pen drives,” Jeno says. “It is in fact high-value
intel. Huang tells me you have other information you haven’t shared.”

“That’s right.”

“Alright.” Jeno pushes the tablet in front of Taeyong, where it shows small letters against a white
screen. “We drafted a deal for you. Immunity, if you comply to our demands and hand over all the
intel you have and cooperate with the investigation for indefinite time, if you testify in court
against the Red Stain, if you attended four-hundred hours of community service and a sensitivity
program. You will also be ordered to report to the Counterterrorism Division regularly for
interrogation during the next five years, and subject yourself to random inspection of your home
for this period.”

“Sounds perfect to me,” Taeyong says promptly. His heart is beating fast.

Renjun gets up and uncuffs him.

“You can scan your fingerprint when you are ready to sign,” Jeno says.

Taeyong swipes down the deal, skimming. Then he presses his index print on the right spot. The
screen flashes green.

“Done,” he says.

“Thank you, Mr. Lee,” Jeno says, getting up and collecting the tablet. “What you did may help
save many lives and put a stop to this era of terror.”

“Glad to be of service.”

“I’ll take you to see Ten now,” Renjun says.

They leave the room and walk the halls of the Division for a while. Taeyong cracks his neck and
rolls out his shoulders. They arrive at a door, which Renjun opens and motions for Taeyong to go
inside. He does. Ten is sitting when he sees Taeyong. He gets up and rushes to him. They embrace
each other tightly.
“Are you alright?” Ten asks.

“I am now that I’m with you,” Taeyong whispers in his ear.

“I was so worried.”

“It’s okay. I got the deal.”

They look at each other and smile. Ten kisses him briefly.

“What about you?”

“I got suspended,” Ten says.

Taeyong cups his cheeks. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. I deserve it.”

“We need to head out, Taeyong,” Renjun says. “There is work to be done.”

“Okay,” Taeyong says.

“I’ll wait for you until you are free,” Ten says.

“I love you.” Taeyong kisses him.

“I love you,” Ten whispers.

Taeyong follows Renjun out. When they reach their destiny, it’s a large room with a table, and six
other men sitting on it, one of them Jeno.

Renjun does introductions. “This is Mark Lee, Lee Donghyuck, Na Jaemin, Zhong Chenle, Park
Jisung, and you already know Jeno.”

“Take a seat, Mr. Lee,” says Mark.

“You can call me Taeyong.” He sits.

Jeno puts his elbows on the table and his hands together. “Taeyong, we are going to need to go
over everything about your time at the Red Stain, from the start.”

“Yes, sir. There is only a problem,” Taeyong says.

“What?” Jeno asks.

“I need to report back to them by tomorrow night or they will know I’m missing,” he explains.

“We will make the most of our time, then.” Jeno nods.

So Taeyong starts. They bring him coffee, water, and a sandwich. He starts from the moment his
father rescinded his Peitharchía application and sent him to that wasteland. He tells everything to
the littlest details, the training, the violence, the mock torture and interrogations, the team-building
exercises. How he was sent back during winter and how his father threatened Ten if Taeyong
didn’t break up with him. He tells about the selection the Red Stain enacted to pick them by their
better skills, and how he faked being bad at shooting so he wouldn’t be put on the assault team. He
tells about the rest of the time spent honing his skills before getting to do fieldwork. He tells how
he used his free time to collect offline intel on the Red Stain and his father. He tells about the day
he found out Ten was Skopós and how he vowed he would protect him as much as he could. He
tells about the day Ten spared his life and how this led him to reach out and finally put his plan to
go to the authorities into action.

Hours later, the officers from the Division talk amongst themselves.

“What we need from you now is for you to go back like nothing happened,” Donghyuck says.

“That’s doable. Can I ask something?”

“Sure,” says Jaemin.

“What will happen to Ten?”

“Ten is suspended for a while,” Mark explains.

“I know. But will you put an officer at his home?” Taeyong presses on.

“Why?” Mark asks.

“Because if anything happens to me, or if my father gets wind of this, there will be consequences,”
Taeyong explains. “And while I can fend for myself, I don’t want Ten to fall into the wrong hands.
If I’m busy working undercover for the Red Stain while you plan a way to take them down, I can’t
protect him.”

The men don’t answer.

“My father despises Ten. He needs to stay safe.”

“We will work on that, Taeyong,” Mark assures him.

Taeyong can breathe easier now.

When Taeyong comes back, he and Ten can go home. They walk the streets together until Ten’s
apartment. They get inside and hang their coats.

“Heechul corroborated our accounts of the day you saved us,” Ten says gleefully. “I think that
helped your case a lot. Especially to prove you weren’t really one of them.”

“That’s good.”

“Do you want something to drink?”

“Coffee.”

Ten fixes them a pot, and while they wait Taeyong hugs him from behind and nuzzles his nape.
Ten puts his arms on top of Taeyong’s and they stay like that in silence.

“I’m scared,” Ten says.

“It’s okay.”
“You’re going back into a den of terrorists.”

“It’s where I’ve been for years,” he says against Ten’s nape, brushing his lips on the skin.

“But now you’ve betrayed them,” Ten says, turning around to look at him. “What if they find out?”

“They won’t.” He puts their noses together.

“What if they decide to turn on you?”

“They will never kill me. My father still needs heirs,” Taeyong says.

“They can do worse things than kill you.”

“I can take anything they do to me. As long as you are safe.” Taeyong cups his cheeks and kisses
him.

Ten sighs. The coffee machine finishes brewing, and they serve themselves two cups. It’s the
middle of the night, but they don’t intend to sleep. After drinking, they lie in bed together, and
eventually they fuck twice.

Taeyong plays with the ring around Ten’s neck.

“When will you wear this on your finger?”

Ten smiles. “When all of this is over. I’m so used to wearing it on my neck, though, it will be weird
to not have it that way.”

“I’m so glad you kept it,” he whispers.

“Me too.” Ten recalls the day Taeyong gifted the ring, how they were at the old apartment.
“Taeyong. Tell me something.”

Taeyong looks at him with his round gray eyes.

“Did you buy my parents an apartment?”

He blushes. “I did.”

“So I was right all along,” Ten says. “Why?”

“Because you mean everything to me. And I didn’t want your parents to struggle paying expensive
rent,” he explains. “It cost me barely anything, but it would mean a lot to your family to have your
own place.”

Ten strokes his cheek. “Thank you. It really helped take off some of the financial burden we were
dealt. Maybe now that I have a job I can pay you back—”

“Don’t. Please. It’s a gift.” Taeyong kisses him. “A wedding gift.”

“W-what?”

Taeyong smiles. “One of many.” He nuzzles his nose against Ten’s.

“Yongie…” Ten chuckles. “Are you being serious?”

“Yes.” He intertwines their hands. “When this is over, will you marry me?”
 “Yes, I will.”

Chapter End Notes

THEY ARE GETTING MARRIEEEEEEED

 in the cracks of light i dreamed of you
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

After Taeyong leaves, an officer called Kim Jiyoung from the Homeland Defense Division comes
knocking on Ten’s door, claiming he’ll be posted in his apartment to guard him. It’s awkward to
have a stranger in his tiny studio apartment, and if he leaves Jiyoung will come along with him, but
he just makes do.

The days go by excruciatingly slow as Ten can’t distract himself with anything for long. He tries to
watch shows but his mind wanders back to Taeyong, where he is, if he’s safe, when he is coming
back. The Homeland officers take turns guarding Ten. He was forbidden to disclose anything to
anyone, so he can’t vent to Jaehyun, can’t go over to his house without Jiyoung, so he just stays
isolated, so he doesn’t have to explain why an officer is there babysitting him. Ten is glad Taeyong
thought about his safety, though.

Mark Lee is sitting at the Auditorium with all the commanders and assault teams from the
Counterterrorism Division and others that are involved in Operation Dream. They are going over
the last details.

“We launch as zero three hundred hours,” says Lee Taemin, the Division director. “Everyone must
be ready to go two hours before that.”

They will all strike at once, over five hundred highly trained soldiers, at all the different known
Red Stain locations.

“You are dismissed,” Taemin says. “Godspeed.”

Mark gets up. He’ll be coordinating with his team in one of the control mission rooms. He needs
some coffee. It’s gonna be a long night.

It’s six in the morning when someone rings Taeyong’s doorbell. He is already awake and dressed,
like he usually is in a day of work. He trails to his door and looks at the small screen beside it that
shows the outside of his door. It’s Kim Jongin and Doh Kyungsoo, two members of the Red Stain.
What they are doing here at this time, Taeyong has no idea, but he opens the door anyway as to not
raise suspicions.

“Hey,” he says.

“Your father is summoning you,” Kyungsoo says, emotionless.

“Alright. Let me get my things.”

Taeyong puts his pistol in the back holster and shrugs a winter coat on. He’s not going to question
his father’s wishes, especially now that he needs things to remain as unsuspicious as possible. So
he gets in the back of the car, which Jongin steers, while Kyungsoo takes the passenger seat. It’s a
long and silent drive to the outskirts of the Capital where the Lee family manor is located.

When they arrive, they stop by the double-door entrance. Taeyong moves towards it and the other
two follow him. The butler shows up.

“Your father is waiting for you in the sitting room,” he says.

“Alright.”

Taeyong continues his path. When he gets there, he sees his father, mother, Seulgi, and her parents.
Taeyong approaches them, trying to keep his expression schooled.

“Good morning.”

Eunji opens a wide smile. “Hello, darling. Are you ready for the big day?”

Taeyong looks at everyone and gulps. “Today?”

“Yes, of course. Haven’t your father told you?”

His fist closes.

“He must have forgotten,” Seojun says. “Why don’t we head inside so you can change into proper
attire?”

Taeyong simply nods, as to not make a scene in front of Seulgi and her parents. But he can’t marry
her. He needs to stall, try to convince his father to postpone somehow. He’s so close to being with
Ten.

He follows Seojun out and Jongin and Kyungsoo remain at his back. Now their presence makes
more sense. They are there to keep an eye on him, to prevent him from leaving. Taeyong arrives in
his room, where a suit has been laid out on the bed. Jongin unlocks the closet door.

“Father, can we not do this—”

Jongin turns on the light inside Taeyong’s closet, and it shows someone inside.

Ten.

Taeyong widens his eyes, his heart climbing up his throat, as panic seeps in his gut. He rushes
towards Ten, who is on his knees with his hands tied back. He kneels in front of him and cups his
face.

“Taeyong…” he calls, his voice trembling.

“I’m here. I’m here,” Taeyong says uselessly. He embraces Ten close.

“He’s unharmed,” Seojun says. “For now.”

Jongin cocks a gun that’s pointed at Ten’s head. Taeyong’s body starts to burn with rage.

“I thought you might hesitate to follow my instructions,” his father explains calmly. “So I’ve taken
precautions.”
Taeyong keeps holding Ten tight, not wanting to let go of him. His hands are shaking. He can feel
the weight of the pistol on his back and the urge to draw it, but it’s no use. He’s been trapped,
outsmarted, outplayed.

“You said you would keep him safe and out of it,” Taeyong struggles to say.

“He is safe. As long as you get dressed, get down there, and do as you’re told.”

Taeyong’s hand strokes the back of Ten’s head. “I love you,” he whispers in his ear only loud
enough of both of them to hear. “You’ll be okay. I promise.”

Ten nods faintly.

“Move,” Seojun says.

Taeyong takes a deep breath and stands, going back into the room. He undresses until his
underwear and puts on the suit, all the while looking at Ten, who keeps his head down, bangs
falling over his face.

“When will you let him go?” he asks.

“After the deed is done.”

“How will I know you’ll keep your word?” Taeyong glares at his father.

“You don’t,” Seojun says.

“I wanna see him after,” he tries to bargain.

“You are in no position to make demands, Taeyong.”

“Please,” he begs, because it’s the only thing he can do now. “Don’t hurt him.”

“Behave, and I won’t.”

Taeyong exhales, trembling. “Let me say goodbye at least.”

Seojun just nods. Taeyong rushes to Ten’s side, cupping his face between his hands.

“This will be over soon,” he whispers.

Ten isn’t crying. He is being brave, despite everything. Taeyong seals their lips in a sweet kiss.

“Time to go,” his father says.

Taeyong kisses Ten one more time before getting up. He steadies himself, searching for the
strength to do this. The steps he takes into the ballroom are the hardest he ever had to take. There,
a priest awaits, along with his mother and Seulgi, dressed in a beautiful white dress, bouquet in her
hands, and the Kangs. The look on her face must mirror Taeyong’s because she seems sick. This is
as hard for her as it is for him.

Taeyong stands in front of her, while Kyungsoo remains at his back.

“You can start,” Seojun tells the priest.

He does, but Taeyong can’t listen. All he hears is the blood thumping in his ears. All he sees is the
image of Ten surrendered in his closet. Taeyong and Seulgi repeat the words they are told to. Eunji
hands them their gold wedding bands, and they place them on each other’s fingers.

“You may kiss the bride.”

Taeyong leans in and kisses the space right beside the corner of Seulgi’s mouth. He can’t bring
himself to actually kiss her.

Eunji claps excitedly. “Congratulations!”

Taeyong hugs his mom and receives hugs from his now in-laws. But immediately after, he glowers
at his father.

“May we have a word?” he says.

Seojun nods. The two of them head back to Taeyong’s room, followed by Kyungsoo.

“Let him go,” Taeyong barks, rushing to Ten’s side. “It’s done. Just let him go.”

His father motions to Jongin, who opens the cuffs that held Ten. Now free, they hold each other
tight. Ten lets out a shuddering breath.

“I’m here,” Taeyong whispers. “I’ll get you home.”

“Not so fast,” says Seojun. “You haven’t slept with your wife.”

Taeyong’s whole body stiffens like stone, his eyes bulging.

“What’s he talking about?” Ten asks in a murmur.

Taeyong can’t find the words to answer it.

“He’ll stay in the closet with Jongin while you perform your duties. I’ll fetch Seulgi.”

Seojun leaves with Kyungsoo. Ten moves to look at Taeyong, and his face is a mix of hurt and
horrified.

“I’m sorry,” Taeyong mumbles. “It was part of the deal. To keep you safe. That I would marry
whoever he wanted.”

Taeyong is shaking violently, his eyes are burning. He has been through so fucking much. He’s
been beaten and left to bleed, to heal with no medical assistance. He’s been kept away from Ten all
this time. But this is the worst thing he will ever be put through. He doesn’t think he can physically
go through it. There must be a way to avoid it.

“Wait outside,” Jongin says, waving his pistol at him. “Do it.”

Taeyong moves, feeling blind, removed from reality. He stands there as the closet doors shut
behind him. He wipes the tears that streamed down his face. Seulgi shows up and Seojun closes
the door. She has the weirdest look on her face.

“Your father said you wanted to see me?” she asks. She frowns. “Are you alright?”

“I—I’m okay.” His voice is hoarse.

They stand around in silence awkwardly.

 “What did you want?” Seulgi asks, taking some steps toward him.

“We should… we should.” Taeyong gulps. “Consummate the marriage.”

He needs to at least say the words so Jongin and possibly Seojun waiting outside his door can hear
it. He needs to think fast and find a way to convince Seulgi to pretend they did the act, while not
giving it away to anyone.

Her eyes go wide. “Now? Everyone is around.”

“I know.”

Seulgi puts a hand on Taeyong’s cheek. She’s closer now. He’ll hold her and whisper into her
ear…

“You don’t look good, Taeyong. We don’t have to—”

The sound of glass breaking interrupts them. Taeyong’s eyes scan the room quickly and he sees a
grenade on the floor. He grabs Seulgi by the arm and pulls her towards the closet.

“Get down!” he yells.

More glass shatters. Taeyong throws himself on top of Ten, hands over his lover’s head. Jongin
fires his pistol, and shots of an assault rifle follow. Jongin falls to the ground. All Taeyong can
hear is a commotion as smoke starts seeping inside the closet. His eyes burn and tear up, he coughs
and sneezes, has difficulty breathing, and he loses his sight. Ten and Seulgi also cough and pant.
Tear gas grenade.

But as much as it hurts, Taeyong understands what this means. The Counterterrorism Division
made their move. Taeyong only hopes they caught his father before he could escape.

The three of them stay like that, blind and crying in the closet for a while. Taeyong keeps Ten in
his arms, unable to move away from him, not wanting to. He feels so relieved. It’s over. This
nightmare is finally over.

Mark is in the Situation Room.

“They have fifty armed people inside,” says the commanding officer. “We don’t know how many
casualties. But we received notice that Chairwoman Kwon was moved to the underground bunker
in time.”

“Good. We need to strategize,” says Taemin. “We need all the personnel available that isn’t in the
other missions. Summon everyone.”

Chapter End Notes

the worst is behind them

 and i pulled your body into mine
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten is sitting in the music room of Taeyong’s manor. His eyes feel better after they applied a
solution that counteracts the tear gas, but he’s still sniffling. Taeyong is sitting beside him, a hand
around his back, the other on his thigh. He hasn’t left his side since the moment in the closet when
the assault team broke into the house to arrest Lee Seojun. Ten is so relieved it finally happened.
They took Taeyong’s father into custody.

They sit silent there, too exhausted and in shock to say anything. Two members of the assault team
are talking to Eunji not far from them.

The radio of one of them buzzes, and she trades some words with central command.

“Roger that,” she says. She walks up to Ten and Taeyong. “Ten Lee?”

“Yes.” Ten glances at her.

“There is a Code C.I.D. ongoing right now, not far from here. All available units are being called
for duty. How are your eyes?”

“My eyes are fine,” Ten says.

“Alright. They are bringing your gear, and your spotter is coming along. We’ll give you a lift.”

Ten looks at Taeyong.

“Go. I’ll be here with my mom. You can come back when you are done.”

“Okay. I love you.” Ten gives him a kiss.

“I love you,” Taeyong says.

Ten gets up and follows the officer out to one of their vans. They drive not far from there, where
the manor of Chairwoman Kwon Boah is. They quickly brief Ten on the situation. The Red Stain
attempted a coup d’état, trying to kill the Chairwoman, but she and her security team managed to
escape to the underground bunker in time. Now the terrorists are still in loco, demanding safe
escape in trade of the staff they surrendered.

What the Red Stain wasn’t expecting when they attempted the coup was that the Counterterrorism
Division would be kicking down the door of each known Red Stain cell and taking them into
custody, leaving them with no backup. The Red Stain was ready to fight for control of the country,
except they got ambushed first.

“Sharpshooter,” Heechul says when he sees Ten. “I missed you.”

Ten smiles as they slap their hands and bump shoulders. Heechul has Ten’s rifle in a bag. They are
positioned on the rooftop of a neighboring manor that has the view to the side of Chairwoman’s
mansion. It shows a part of the garden and the tall windows of the three-story building. Ten puts
his uniform baseball cap with the visor to the back, positions his rifle on the ledge and sits as
comfortably as he can.
“I see movement,” Heechul says, looking through his spotting scope.

“Roger that, CND,” the radio replies.

Ten moves his scope to the coordinates Heechul gives him. He sees a person with a bulletproof
vest, balaclava mask, and an assault rifle in their hands, pacing around the room.

“Waiting orders,” Ten says.

Time ticks by while Ten watches. He sees others inside, and they are constantly moving. Maybe
even aware that someone might snipe them.

“Teams 1 and 2 are ready to engage,” the radio chirps. “TNT, you are authorized to use lethal fire
against any stragglers.”

“Roger that.”

Ten takes a deep breath. A minute later, he can see the flashes of light indicating gunfire inside the
manor. He catches a Red Stain through the window, and doesn’t hesitate to pull the trigger. The
terrorist falls. The bullets from his NCT127 rifle pierce through bulletproof vests. Ten keeps his
scope moving, scanning through the windows. He sees another hostile, another shot, another one
down. Another, then another. One of them actually crashes through the window and tries to make a
run for it in the gardens, and Ten takes them down.

“Hostiles are down,” the radio informs. “I repeat, all hostiles are down.”

Ten sighs relieved.

“You never miss, Sharpshooter,” Heechul tells him. “Well done.”

Ten smiles at him and the older taps his shoulder.

After everything is packed, Ten is dismissed. Other officers give him praise for the work done.
They offer him a ride back to Taeyong’s manor.

He is waiting for Ten at the entrance, and they rush into each other’s arms.

“How is your mother doing?” Ten asks.

“Not well,” he says. “I told her everything. She had no idea of what my father did.”

“I’m so sorry.” Ten rubs his arms up and down.

“I should stay with her,” Taeyong says. “But you can go home if you want, after… everything.”

“I will stay with you, if that’s okay,” Ten smiles softly.

Taeyong smiles back. “Of course you can. There’s nothing I want more than being with you.”

They lean closer, their foreheads touching, their hands clasped together.

They are safe, alive. They survived.

Taeyong lies in bed with Ten in his arms. They haven’t done anything, but they are both naked. He
breathes deeply, knowing that, in years, they finally can sleep completely peaceful, no dangers
lurking.

They spend some days keeping company to his mother. She hasn’t reacted well to everything, but
she’s managing.

News arrives to Ten that his suspension has been officially lifted. They also hear about the success
of the mission to take down the Red Stain. The ones that weren’t killed during the assault are in
custody and awaiting processing and trial.

Eventually, Taeyong and Ten make the drive to Ten’s apartment. Back to his phone, Ten calls
Jaehyun and Doyoung over. Taeyong is standing in the living room when they arrive. Both of their
faces become stunned the second they see him there. Taeyong wrings the fingers of his left hand
nervously. Jaehyun is the first to make a move. He gives Taeyong a hug.

“I was going to punch you,” he says. “But I won’t.”

Taeyong nods, grateful.

Jaehyun stands back, giving space for Doyoung to approach. But he doesn’t move. Taeyong and
Doyoung, oldest of friends, stay locked in a staring contest, their faces blank. Ten and Jaehyun end
up leaving them alone, closing the door of the apartment behind them.

“I’m sorry,” Taeyong finally says. “I couldn’t risk being around you.”

Doyoung takes measured steps until he is standing in front of Taeyong, whose heart is beating in
his ears. Doyoung puts his arms around him, and it feels like Taeyong can finally breathe.

“I missed you, brother,” Doyoung says.

Tears flood Taeyong’s eyes and quickly spill out. He hugs Doyoung back.

“I missed you too.”

They stay like that while Taeyong cries silently. After, they talk, and Taeyong tells Doyoung and
Jaehyun everything that happened. The four of them order pizza for dinner and hang out. Taeyong
feels like a normal person for the first time in years.

The next days, Taeyong divides his time between being with Ten and his friends, being with his
mom, and going in to provide his help with the Counterterrorism Division and the case against the
Red Stain. He and Seulgi file for an annulment of their marriage and it’s soon processed. Taeyong
moves his mom to one of their family apartments downtown, so she’s closer, and she’s also
summoned to give a deposition on the case. Besides that, Taeyong needs to take over the family
business, something he knows nothing about, at least the part that isn’t seized by the government
for investigation. He learns quickly that he needs to delegate.

Ten starts using the commitment band on his ring finger and seeing it brings Taeyong unparallel
joy.

Sometimes at night he wakes up in a cold sweat, with flashbacks to all the moments of terror he
lived through. But as he senses Ten’s warm presence beside him, his heart slows down, his
breathing calms. He feels for Ten’s body, and the firmness under his hand reassures him that
everything is alright now.
With Ten’s incentive, Taeyong starts seeing a therapist weekly to deal with all the trauma he
endured. The progress is slow, but it feels good to open up about it all.

The trial of Lee Seojun is broadcasted everywhere around Corinth and the world, and everyone is
kept on the edge of their seats while they watch the business magnate turned terrorist fall from
grace, dressed in the orange prison uniform. Taeyong doesn’t miss any of it. He wants to be there
to see what fate has in store for the man that transformed his life into hell for all these years.

When the verdict comes, Taeyong can’t seem to feel pity. It’s the death sentence. Serving as an
example for the entire country: this is what happens to terrorists in Corinth. His mother mourns, but
none of them attends the execution.

In the aftermath of the Red Stain trials, Chairwoman Boah announces changes in the country’s
economic and social systems, with the intent of removing people from the lines of poverty—mostly
refugee and immigrants, but also born Corinthians. A more egalitarian society is underway, she
proclaims. The Chairwoman also says the government will implement policies to educate the
population on status-based discrimination.

Using the money his father hoarded for years, Taeyong decides to turn the Lee estate into a center
for refugees, and fund programs for their inclusion in Corinth, like language classes and training
programs.

Eventually, things take on a normalcy they never had before. His routine with Ten is amazing. He
loves going to sleep and waking up beside him every day and night. Ten continues his work as
Skopós, and Taeyong continues working in the Lee family business. They spend time with
Doyoung and Jaehyun. Seulgi finally confesses her love for Irene, and they officially get together.

Taeyong decides to buy three apartments in the same building. One for him and Ten, one for Ten’s
parents, and one for his mom. That way, they all stay close to each other. Eunji, Jongdae and Jimin
get acquainted and soon become good friends. They are happy for their sons.

The sun is setting when Ten gets to the apartment. Taeyong is lounging on the couch with his
phone.

“Hey. How was work?” Taeyong asks.

Ten hangs his coat and takes off his shoes. “It was good.”

Taeyong puts his phone aside, ready to get up, when Ten stops and kneels in front of him, putting
his hand on Taeyong’s thigh. Taeyong thumbs Ten’s jawline softly. His eyes are glinting with
something different. Taeyong smiles.

“What?”

Ten fishes something inside the pocket and offers it to Taeyong.

It’s a white gold ring.

Taeyong’s jaw drops.

“Ten…”

“I know it’s not fancy. I know it has no diamonds on it. But I saved up because I really wanted to
give you a ring,” Ten says. “And ask you if you want to marry me.”
 Tears are filling Taeyong’s eyes. He looks at the ring, then at Ten.

“It’s beautiful. I love it.”

Ten smiles. Taeyong offers his right hand and Ten slides the ring on the finger. He pulls him to his
lap, and they kiss. Taeyong strokes his cheek.

“God, Ten. I love you so much. I wanna marry you now.”

Ten chuckles. “Let’s do it.”

Chapter End Notes

ill confess the paragraphs made me tear up a bit lol

next chapter is more of an epilogue

 i had a feeling so peculiar this pain wouldn’t be for evermore
Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Ten and Taeyong get married in the courthouse, only with their family and closest friends. As
much money as Taeyong has inherited, they don’t need anything lavish. They just want to wed.

When they arrive home, they take off their shoes and trail to the bedroom. Their most intimate
space, the place they can let go. Ten stands by the foot of the bed to unbutton his black blazer
when he feels Taeyong stop behind him, hands over his. Ten smiles. Taeyong begins to take off
the jacket for him, while he nuzzles Ten’s nape. He slowly pushes it down, then moves to open the
white shirt Ten is wearing. He places kisses on Ten’s skin, who shuts his eyes and enjoys the
affection.

After removing the tie and shirt, Taeyong runs his palms over Ten’s chest, down to his abs, and
onto the buckle of his belt. He opens it and the pants. Taeyong pushes the fabric down while
running his lips on Ten’s spine, making him sigh. Ten steps out of them and Taeyong takes off his
socks. He turns Ten around and Taeyong remains on his knees in front of him while he kneads the
muscle of his thighs. Heat spreads through Ten’s body as he relaxes under his husband’s touch.
Taeyong kisses the skin devotedly as they look at each other and Ten strokes his blond hair.

Taeyong moves his lips over Ten’s half hard cock and kisses it. Ten gasps quietly. Cupping Ten’s
asscheeks, Taeyong mouths the length, and more blood rushes there, filling it entirely. Ten feels a
slight tremble in his legs.

“Taeyong…” he whispers.

He pulls down Ten’s briefs, freeing the erection. Taeyong grabs it by the hilt, licks the head and
swallows him.

“Ahh—”

Taeyong moves his head back and forth slowly, going as far as he can. Ten moans freely as his
core brightens, and he watches Taeyong pleasure him. He keeps going, licking the underside,
wrapping his lips around the sensitive head tightly.

“Ahh—Taeyong,” he pants. “Stop or am gonna cum.”

He does and grins at Ten. Taeyong stands and reaches for his tie, while Ten unbuttons the shirt and
then works on the belt and zipper. With their joint effort, soon Taeyong is completely naked too.
Ten goes to the bedside table and takes the bottle of lube out, climbing into bed next, where
Taeyong joins him.

Kneeling in front of each other, Ten cups Taeyong’s face and they brush their lips softly.

“I love you, my love,” Ten whispers.

Taeyong smiles from ear to ear. “I love you too.”

He grabs the lube.

“Let me make you feel good,” Taeyong says.

Ten nods and lies down while Taeyong coats his fingers. Ten turns on his side with his back to him
and Taeyong molds into him, depositing kisses on his nape as his wet digit rubs around Ten’s rim.
He exhales loudly when Taeyong pushes it inside. His husband carefully stretches him and teases
his spot until Ten is breathing hard. When he feels enough prepared and horny, Ten moves, lying
on his back. He grabs the lube and pours some on Taeyong’s hand, who spreads it on his cock. Ten
looks at Taeyong with half-lidded eyes.

“Come here.”

Taeyong smiles and climbs in between Ten’s legs, who spreads and folds them towards his chest.
Taeyong positions himself and begin to push into him. Slowly, Ten is filled by his girth. He gasps
and shuts his eyes, letting that powerful feeling wash over him. The feeling of deep connection and
belonging to the one he loves most in this entire world. Taeyong kisses his lips and starts thrusting
into Ten.

They move in a slow dance, like stars crossing the night sky. Taeyong holds Ten by the back of the
knee, his other hand stroking his head. Ten looks into Taeyong’s eyes as they fuck and he can see
entire galaxies in them, just like the time they laid together on the grass back at the Academy and
stared at Vega, Altair, and Deneb. Ten palms his spine and clutches his blond hair in between his
fingers while they kiss and pant and moan.

Taeyong goes faster, chasing that feeling for them, taking them together through this glimmering
path. Ten moans louder, voicing out all of his arousal. Taeyong holds him tighter, his hips
snapping back and forth, his face burrowing in the crook of Ten’s neck.

“Ten,” he calls, his voice dripping with lust.

Ten feels their warmth run through his entire flesh until he is scorching like a sun. He throws his
head back and rolls his eyes shut, nails digging into Taeyong’s skin. He’s on the brink of his peak,
can already taste its sweetness, its blazing surrender.

“Ahh—Taeyong!” he cries out desperately as his orgasm hits him, and when Taeyong groans
alongside his moans, it only adds to the high.

Taeyong heaves at the last thrusts, spilling inside Ten. He kisses Ten’s collarbone and neck up to
his lips. Ten strokes the back of Taeyong’s head as they kiss softly.

Here, in the intimacy of their embrace, the world is not such a cold place.

They stop to look at each other and smile.

“Hey, husband,” Taeyong says.

Ten beams. “Hey, husband.”

“I hope you are well rested,” Taeyong smiles playfully. “Because this was the first round of
many.”

Ten laughs, his entire core shaking under Taeyong.

“Yes, please,” Ten says, caressing his husband’s cheek. “I still blame myself for not doing it
sooner.”

“You shouldn’t,” Taeyong says, taking his hand and kissing the knuckles. “Everyone has their own
time to take that step.”
“Yeah, mine just took almost six years too late.”

Taeyong furrows his brow slightly. “You… haven’t?”

Ten is confused. “Haven’t what?”

His husband looks deep into his eyes. “When we reunited that night, it was your first time—ever?”

“Yes. I thought that was obvious,” Ten chuckles.

But Taeyong is taken aback. “I figure maybe you would have…” He gulps. “With other people.
Which was totally in your right. That’s why I never asked.”

Ten smiles. “Taeyong.” He cups his face. “You’re my first. My first everything.”

Taeyong just gapes for a moment, taking in all of Ten’s face.

“I never got together with anyone either,” Taeyong says, sounding a little choked. “I tried, and it
didn’t work.”

Ten kisses his forehead, trying to lend him some comfort, because the subject is clearly delicate.

“It would have been okay if you did,” Ten assures him. “We were broken up.”

Taeyong hides his face against Ten’s neck and exhales long and loud. Ten holds him close, palms
on his back, and shuts his eyes, just enjoying having his husband with him.

“It wasn’t obvious,” Taeyong adds, his voice muffled by Ten’s skin. “You seemed to know what
you wanted.”

“Well, I did finger myself from time to time,” Ten says. “Thinking back to the time you did it.”

Taeyong lifts his head to look at Ten, his gray eyes half-lidded. “Oh?”

Ten grins.

“I thought about you too,” Taeyong whispers, rubbing their lips together. “Whenever I touched
myself.”

Ten flutters his eyes shut, a spark traveling to his center, as he sighs. Taeyong begins to deposit
kisses on Ten’s face and neck. Ten digs his fingers into Taeyong’s back.

“What did you think?” Ten dares to ask.

“The look on your face when you cum,” Taeyong mutters. “Your smooth skin.” His big palm
travels over Ten’s shoulder to his neck. “Your beautiful figure.” He presses their bodies together.

Ten hums happily, spurring him on. His cock is getting harder. Taeyong places his lips on Ten’s
earlobe.

“Your ass,” he whispers. Ten gasps. “Your cock.” He bites the earlobe. “Everything about you
makes me horny.”

Ten whines. Taeyong drags his lips on the skin down the neck, lavishing the collarbone. His
tongue moves lower and plays with Ten’s nipple.
“Ahh!”

His husband repositions in between his legs.

“I’m still dirty,” Ten points out. Cum has been sitting on his belly since his last orgasm.

Taeyong dips his heads and licks the spunk, drinking it all.

“T-Taeyong!” Ten squeals shakily.

His belly is wiped clean. Taeyong looks at him.

“Even your cum tastes good.”

He blushes. Taeyong grabs the hilt of Ten’s cock and licks the head. Ten whimpers as he continues
mouthing the length until it’s fully hard. Next, he takes it past his lips, swallowing it further and
further, then bobbing his head up and down. Ten’s fists close on the sheets under him as he chews
his bottom lip, noises escaping him, nonetheless. He relaxes deeper and deeper into his arousal
until he’s panting.

“I’m gonna cum,” he warns.

Taeyong stops, leaving Ten’s cock aching for more. He picks him by the hips and turn him around,
put him on all fours. Ten is still wet from before. He exhales and shuts his eyes, arching his back as
he feels Taeyong’s cock push inside. Ten lets out a bold moan, getting filled up perfectly in this
position. Taeyong stops when he bottoms out. He takes one of Ten’s arms and helps him up, until
they are glued back to chest, holding him by the waist. He cups Ten’s cheek so he is facing him.
Taeyong smiles softly, his gray eyes glinting like diamonds with the light that enters through the
windows, and kisses Ten with tongue deeply. Ten holds Taeyong’s head with one hand and his
forearm with the other.

Taeyong thrusts in and out slowly, but it’s enough to stoke the fires in Ten’s flesh. He moans,
muffled by Taeyong’s lips on his. It’s paced and measured, but entirely capable of driving Ten
crazy. He imagines this is exactly his husband’s intention. The feeling of their bodies close
together like this is heavenly, intimate, special.

“Say the word and I’ll fuck you hard,” Taeyong whispers.

“Ahh!” Ten is feeling dizzy with lust. He wants it all, everything Taeyong can give him. “Yes.
Harder.”

Taeyong gently puts Ten down on all fours, and leans back, grabbing him by the hips. Ten sinks to
his elbows, forehead on the sheets. Taeyong moves back, almost all the way out, then shoves it
back in.

“Taeyong,” Ten pants, his eyes shut, his lips parted.

He picks up the speed faster, harder just like Ten asked for. In this position, the cock fills him up
entirely, hitting his spot easily. A loud moan croons for every thrust. Ten can hear Taeyong
grunting still, his breath labored, his grip vicious.

“Ahh—Taeyong—” Ten whines. “Don’t stop.”

Taeyong continues pounding into him in the most perfect way, while Ten barrels towards his high.
He is being overflown with the most amazing sensation, and his loudness is a testament of that.
“Ahhh!” Ten cries, his toes curling as his center explodes with pleasure. “Taeyong!”

He calls out the name of his lover, his one and only, and Taeyong answers, moaning back as he
fucks them through their orgasms. He spills inside Ten one more time, and it slows until it comes
to a stop.

Both are panting harshly. Taeyong carefully slips out and moves Ten around the bed, lying him
down and taking his side, pulling him close, kissing his shoulder.

“God. I love you.”

Ten, eyes still closed, grins.

“I love you too.”

They just catch their breaths and remain still, too fucked out to do anything else.

Ten finally moves, turning to Taeyong and seeking his lips. They kiss softly, fueled by sweetness
and content.

“Let me clean you up this time,” his husband says.

Taeyong kisses him one more time before rolling off him and grabbing tissues so they can clean
themselves and the bed. After that and a run to the bathroom, Taeyong rummages through his
bedside table drawer and pulls out a package of choco pie. He waves it at Ten, both smiling.

“Perfect post-sex snack,” Ten says as Taeyong gives him one.

He bites it down. Taeyong stands a little longer as he eats his. He looks at his drawer, then takes
something off it. He sits on the bed in front of Ten and shows his palm. On it, Ten’s photograph
and two aluminum soda can ring tabs.

“Look. I still have them,” Taeyong says happily.

Ten touches them lightly with his fingertips.

“I have something to show you,” he says, and leans towards his bedside table. He takes out the
ones he kept all along, since that December when he got Taeyong’s initials. He shows it to him,
whose reaction is to furrow his brows.

“What are those?”

“My ring tabs. The ones I got that winter break years ago, when we first noticed each other,” Ten
explains. “They are T and L.”

Taeyong’s eyes go wide as he stares at Ten.

“You also…”

Ten nods, smiling. “Jaehyun insisted we play.”

Taeyong smiles too.

“I guess it was written in the stars then.”

Ten chuckles. “Literally.”

 They share a kiss.

Ten and Taeyong use the black velvet box of Ten’s wedding ring to keep the soda can tabs inside,
together, woven by the white gold string Ten used on his neck all those years.

They keep it safe and treasure it as the symbol of the coincidence—or was it fate?—that brought
them together.

Chapter End Notes

omg besties. this is it. what a journey!

i loved sharing this story with you all. i appreciate whoever left kudos and comments
throughout!
if you made it this far, consider leaving a kudos, a keyboard smash, a string of emojis,
or a comment here so i know you enjoyed the story too

more to come on miztopia, ofc! so subscribe if you want to stay updated.

much love to you, reader i appreciate you!

End Notes

kudos and comments appreciated!

mizrosecat and other handles in my profile

Please drop by the archive and comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!