GEd101

UNDERSTANDING
THE SELF

By: Ms. Arah De Sagun-Alcantara

BSU-PB (CABEIHM)
Lecturer III
QUICK PERSONALITY TEST:
SHAPES & YOU
 SQUARE PEOPLE
•These people are level – headed and
practical minded
•They set their foot on the ground
and set realistic expectations
•Their happiness is very simple,
however, once they commit
themselves to a task, they do it well
and with pleasure
•Many managers are born of this type
TRIANGLE PEOPLE
•These people are idealists and
visionaries
•They have high expectations of
themselves and of people
around them
•They plan things ahead and they
pursue their goals relentlessly
•Most achievers such as planners,
leaders, engineers and scientists
belong to this category
CROSS PEOPLE
•These are people who are known for their
self-sacrifice and good heart
•They are also long suffering and and patient
•They are meditative and don’t feel lonely
when alone
•Once provoked, they have a big heart to
forgive
•Their goodness, however is often abused by
the insensitivity of others around them
•Social workers, psychologists, writers,
missionaries, and religious persons fall
under this category
 CIRCLE PEOPLE
•Represents social, harmonious,
and relationship-oriented
individuals.
•Circles are compassionate,
empathic, and good at building
connections with others.
•They value community and tend
to be peacemakers who seek
balance and cooperation.
 CIRCLE PEOPLE
THESE PEOPLE
LOVE SEX, WINE
AND PLEASURE
WEEK 9: THE SEXUAL SELF: UNDERSTANDING SEXUAL
BEHAVIOR, STIS AND CONTRACEPTION
 BUS
CONFESSIONS
DEAR BUS CONFESSIONS,

Itago nyo na lamang po ako sa pangalang Jomarie. Ako ay 18 taong gulang, first year student sa isang prestigious
university. I belong to a middle-class family with four siblings, two boys and two girls. My father is a seaman and my
mother is a fulltime housewife. Although my father is away most of the time, I can still say that I have a happy family
life and a strong Christian foundation.

Nagsimula ang aking problema noong ako ay magkaroon ng manliligaw, isang buwan na ang nakalilipas. I can say
that he is a hunk, every time he looks at me in the eyes ay para akong matutunaw. When he holds my hands, it’s as if
may kuryenteng dumadaloy sa aking katawan, my heart goes wild, I am afraid he might hear it beating. This happens
every time we’re together. And when we’re not together, all I think of is him, I could hardly eat and sleep.

Akala ko, being in love is the best thing that could happen to a human being. But, in my case it also made me guilty.
Ayaw ng mga magulang ko na magkaroon ako ng boyfriend habang ako ay nag-aaral pa. I just can’t help it…
 BUS
CONFESSIONS

… my world is turning upside down, I can’t afford to be without him. What I feel right now is he is the man that I want
to be with for the rest of my life.

Last week, he wants us to go all the way, I was able to control myself and said no. I am afraid na. next time na
tanungin nya ako, I might not be able to say no, I love him so much that I want him to be happy, in fact, I want to do it
too but I am afraid I might get pregnant. Is this true love? What will I do next time he would leave me if I will say no
again. I cant afford to loose him, please help me.

- Jomarie
 LET US EXPLORE…

Discuss the case of Jomarie, what

advice will you give to her? You may
share your own experience if you
feel comfortable sharing it.
 LET US EXPLORE…
•Did anyone in your group share his/her own
experience?
•What were the feelings that surfaced?
•What was on your mind while doing this activity?
•Which part of the activity has the greatest impact on
you? Why?
•What learnings/insights did you gain from this
activity?
UNDERSTANDING THE CHEMISTRY OF LUST,
LOVE AND ATTACHMENT
 According to anthropologist Helen
Fisher (2016) there are three stages of
falling in love. In each stage, a different
set of brain chemicals run the show.
These stages are lust, attraction, and
love.
STAGE 1:
LUST
 When people are in the stage
of lust, they feel physically
attracted and drawn to their
object of affection. There are
elements of mystery that make
things exciting.
 Lust is driven by the desire for sexual
gratification. The evolutionary basis for
this is from people’s need to reproduce, a
need shared among all living things.
Estrogen and Testosterone are the two
basic types of hormones present equally in
men and women’s body that excites the
feeling of lust within the brain
 STAGE 2:
ATTRACTION
 This phase is said to be one of the
beautiful moments of life. This is the
phase when a person actually starts to
feel the love.
In this stage, a person may begin to be
obsessed about their object of
affection and crave for his presence. A
person may don’t feel like sleeping or
eating. People can certainly lust for
someone they are attracted to, and
vice versa, one can happen without
the other.
Scientists think that there are
three neurotransmitters that
are involved in this stage:
adrenaline, dopamine and
serotonin.
Adrenaline

The initial stages of falling for someone

activates your stress response,
increasing your blood levels of
adrenaline and cortisol. This has the
charming effect that when you bump
into your loved one, you start to sweat,
your heart races and your mouth goes
dry.
Dopamine

This chemical stimulates “desire and

reward” by triggering an intense rush of
pleasure. When it is released, people
feel good. Signs of surging dopamine
are as follows: increased energy, less
need for sleep or food, focused
attention and exquisite delight in
smallest details of relationship.
Serotonin

One of love’s most important

chemicals that may explain
why when you’re falling in
love, your new lover keeps
popping into your thoughts.
 STAGE 3:
ATTACHMENT
 This stage involves wanting to make a more
lasting commitment to your loved one. All the
goals are dedicated to the object of affection
being a part of a person’s life. Dopamine
decreases and attraction goes down.
 Scientists think that there might be
two major hormones involved in this
feeling of attachment; oxytocin and
vasopressin which create the desire
to bond, affiliate with, and nurture
your partner. You want to cuddle and
be close and share your deepest
secrets with her. You plan and dream
together
Vasopressin (aka anti-diuretic hormone)

Another important hormone in the long-term

commitment stage and released after sex. It works
with your kidneys to control thirst. Its potential role
in the long-term relationships was discovered when
scientists looked at the prairie vole. Prairie vole
indulge in far more sex than is strictly necessary for
the purpose of reproduction. They also – like
humans – form stable pair-bonds.
E
‘l’t
 DID YOU KNOW???
Chocolate is considered to be an
aphrodisiac food, releasing brain
soothing chemicals which increase
energy and desire levels. Eating Dark
Chocolate releases Phenylethylamine
and Serotonin. The chemical
Phenylethylamine a chemical much like
amphetamine is released in the brain
when individuals feel love. The release
of which is helped along by
Serotonin, the combination of the
increased levels of these chemicals
induce feelings of love.
KAYA KUNG WALA
KANG LOVE LIFE…

MAG –
CHOCOLATE
KA NA LANG!!!
 Understanding the science of lust,
attraction, attachment can help you
develop more realistic expectations of
your relationships.
GUIDE THROUGH THE STAGES OF LOVE:

Don’t mistake lust for love

– give a new relationship
time before you start
dreaming of a future
together.
GUIDE THROUGH THE STAGES OF LOVE:

Keep the dopamine flowing

in a long-term relationship
by having date nights,
studying your lessons, going
on trips in which you do new
and exciting things
together.
GUIDE THROUGH THE STAGES OF LOVE:

Keep the oxytocin flowing

by writing cards and or text
messages, think of your
partner when he/she is not
around, share your hopes
and dreams, and support
your partner
GUIDE THROUGH THE STAGES OF LOVE:

If you’re the jealous,

controlling type, start
developing your own
activities and friendships
that make you feel
important and cared about.
 BUT AGAIN...

KAYA KUNG WALA

KANG LOVE LIFE…

MAG –
CHOCOLATE
KA NA LANG!!!
 LUST OR LOVE

Depending on the situation presented,

make a heart sign if you think its love
and “L” sign if it is lust.
1. Two people text constantly, mostly
exchanging compliments on looks and flirty
messages, but rarely discuss their lives or
goals.
2. One partner gets a job offer in another city.
The other partner encourages them to take
it, even if it means doing long-distance.
3. A new couple spends most of their time
focused on physical intimacy and struggles
to find common interests.
4. One partner gets a big promotion, and the
other plans a thoughtful celebration to
recognize their achievement.
5. A couple has major differences in values,
but they avoid discussing them because
they don’t want to “ruin the vibe.”
6. After a few months, one partner is eager to
introduce the other to their friends and
family.
 7. One partner feels jealous when the other
spends time with friends and often tries to
restrict their social activities.
8. A couple frequently discusses future goals, like
where they’d live and travel together, and
things they want to accomplish as a team.
9. A couple breaks up often over small
disagreements but quickly reunites, feeling
intensely attracted each time.
10. One partner is going through a tough time, and
the other consistently checks in, listens, and
offers encouragement.
LEE’S LOVE STYLES
TRIANGULAR THEORY OF LOVE BY ROBERT
STERNBERG
TRIANGULAR THEORY OF LOVE BY ROBERT
STERNBERG
 ACTIVITY:
PUT A FINGER DOWN
1. Put a finger down if you’ve ever felt
attracted to someone because they always
make you feel good or laugh a lot.
2. Put a finger down if you’ve grown to like
someone more because they support you
or cheer you on.
3. Put a finger down if you’ve noticed you feel
happy every time you’re around someone,
and that’s made you more drawn to them.
4. Put a finger down if you felt attracted to
someone after an exciting or adrenaline-filled
activity, like a scary movie, amusement park
ride, or sports game.
5. Put a finger down if you’ve ever found yourself
liking someone more after a surprising or
emotional event that made your heart race.
6. Put a finger down if you’ve realized you felt
closer to someone because you went through
something intense together.
7. Put a finger down if you’re attracted to
someone who you feel would be a reliable
partner or parent.
8. Put a finger down if you’ve ever been
drawn to someone because they seem
strong, healthy, or supportive.
9. Put a finger down if you feel attracted to
someone who is ambitious or successful
because they seem like they’d be a good
long-term partner.
 PSYCHOLOGICAL THEORIES THAT
EXPLAIN WHY PEOPLE FALL IN LOVE
 BEHAVIORAL REINFORCEMENT THEORY
When someone received a reward such as
free ride or other favors from another, a
positive feeling may be experienced.
The better the feeling associated with
the behavior of a person, the more likely
it is for the behavior to be repeated.
 PHYSIOLOGICAL AROUSAL THEORY
This explains the most acceptable
theories about emotions: the bodies
experience a physiological change first,
then people assign an emotion to that
physical sensation. It is based on the
interpretation of the brain.
 EVOLUTIONARY THEORIES
This explains that love arose due to some
sociobiological need.
Males tend to look for young, healthy
females mates to carry their offspring.
Females prefer males who have the
resources to support them and their
offspring.
Based on social psychological data from Rosenthal
(2013), the factors that would determine with
whom people fall in love are:

Physical attractiveness Reciprocity

Based on social psychological data from Rosenthal
(2013), the factors that would determine with
whom people fall in love are:

Proximity Similarities
 The diversity of sexual behavior:
solitary, heterosexual, homosexual,
bisexual, transsexual
 Human sexual behavior is any activity,
solitary, by pair or by group which
includes sexual arousal. Human sexual
behavior may conveniently be
classified according to the number and
gender of the participants.
 Not all sexual arousal can lead to
sexual activity. Humans are constantly
exposed to sexual stimuli when seeing
attractive persons or seeing
advertisement with sexual themes
through mass media.
 The diversity of sexual behavior is a
reflection of the complexity and
variety of human sexuality, shaped by
personal, social, cultural, and biological
factors.
 SOLITARY SEXUAL BEHAVIOR
Solitary sexual behavior includes any
sexual activity a person engages in alone,
typically for personal pleasure or
self-exploration. This can include
practices like masturbation or the use of
fantasy and imagination for arousal.
 SOCIOSEXUAL
BEHAVIOR

Heterosexual Homosexual
(male with male or
(male with female, v-v)
female with female)
One of the necessary tasks of growing up
is learning to cope with one’s sexual
arousal and to achieve some balance
between suppression, which can be
injurious, and free expression, which can
lead to social difficulties. There is great
variation among individuals in the
strength of sex drive and responsiveness,
so this necessary exercise of restraint is
correspondingly difficult or easy.
 On the other hand, Rosenthal
(2013) defined sexual orientation
as a person’s predisposition or
inclination regarding sexual
behavior, emotional attachment
or physical attraction to one or
both sexes.
SEXUAL ORIENTATIONS
 SEXUAL
ORIENTATIONS

Heterosexual Homosexual Bisexual Transsexual Pansexual

it is the attraction refers to a person is a person who these are people is a new sexual
to members of whose sexual may be sexually experience a gender orientation of
opposite sex. orientation is oriented to both identity that is persons who are
inconsistent with, or
toward another of men and women sexually attracted
not culturally
the same associated with, their to people
sex. assigned sex, and regardless of their
Ex: lesbian; gay desire to sex or gender
permanently identity. The word
transition to pan is a Greek
the gender with word for “all or
which they identify, every”
usually seeking
; “gender blind”
medical assistance.
SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASE
Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STD) are
also known as Sexually Transmitted
Infections (STI), together with venereal
disease, these are infections that are
commonly spread by sexual intercourse.
These are infections that are passed
from one person to another through
sexual contact, blood transfusion,
breastfeeding, and a certain amount of
saliva.
 ACTIVITY:
FACT OR MYTH
 FACT OR MYTH

All STDs show symptoms

MYTH, Many STDs can be asymptomatic, meaning

they show no symptoms but can still cause health
issues and be transmitted to others.
 FACT OR MYTH

Some STDs can be passed

through kissing.

FACT, STDs like herpes and syphilis can be

transmitted through certain types of close contact,
including kissing if there are sores present.
 FACT OR MYTH

Only people who have multiple

sexual partners are at risk for STDs.

MYTH. Anyone who is sexually active can contract

an STD, even if they have only one partner.
 FACT OR MYTH

You can get an STD the first

time you have sex.

FACT.
 FACT OR MYTH

HIV and AIDS are the same

thing

MYTH. HIV is the virus that attacks the immune

system, and AIDS is the condition that develops if
HIV is left untreated.
 FACT OR MYTH

Some STDs can cause long-term

health issues if left untreated.

FACT
 FACT OR MYTH

Birth control pills protect

against STDs.

MYTH. Birth control pills do not provide protection

against STDs; only barrier methods like condoms
reduce the risk of STD transmission.
 FACT OR MYTH

People who get the HPV vaccine

don’t need to worry about HPV.

MYTH. The HPV vaccine protects against certain

high-risk strains but not all types of HPV.
 FACT OR MYTH

You can get an STD from a

toilet seat.

MYTH. STDs are not spread through contact with

surfaces like toilet seats; they are primarily
transmitted through sexual contact or body fluids.
 FACT OR MYTH

Alcohol and drug use can increase

the risk of getting an STD.

FACT. Substance use can impair judgment and lead

to risky sexual behaviors, increasing the chance of
exposure to STDs.
 FACT OR MYTH

You can have multiple STDs at

the same time.

FACT. It’s possible to be infected with

more than one STD simultaneously.
EXAMPLES OF STI’s:
METHODS OF CONTRACEPTION
HORMONAL METHOD OF CONTRACEPTION
BARRIER METHODS
BEHAVIORAL METHODS
STERILIZATION
Intrauterine Device (IUD)
 Emergency Contraception
It is a measure that protects against pregnancy
after unprotected sex has already occurred. It
could be through IUD or higher dosage of pills