Prologue

The lights flashed blinding me and preventing me from seeing any of the reporters faces. Not
that I’d bother to remember their faces even if I could see them

“Mister Emerson! Will you really be returning to the track?”

“Emerson! This way! Look here!”

More flashing and more questions, one after another all looking for the same answer

“Yes” I say simply and the reporters roar with even more questions and I look toward my
subordinate and manager

“Get me out of here” I mouth and they rush forward

“Emerson wait! It’s only been 4 months since your devastating crash and 3 since you got out of
the hospital”

“What about your physical therapy are you really healed?”

“No comment” I say before I’m whisked away their voices meshing into annoying buzzing and I
sigh feeling my physical battery reaching zero. I look to my manager frowning.

“How long were you planning to keep me out there? Huh? It was bad enough just getting past
my so called fans” I complain and my manager stumbles on his words

“Sorry sir, the boss wanted you to have enough screen time”

“Screen time my ass, I agreed to race not prance around like some fucking celebrity” my
manager lowers his head and steps behind me as we walk down a long corridor.

“Do you have a change of clothes for me I’m sweating in this and my leg is beginning to shake
from all that standing”

My manager guides me into a side room and quickly looks both ways before walking in. The
door shuts and I hear a low voice speak.

“Took you long enough,” I knew that voice and it made me pause. I frown and look at the man
before me. He leaned against the wall in a leather jacket and pants. He wore sunglasses with
red tinted lenses. Kieran.

“Why are you here?” I ask and he tilts his head at me.
“What? I can’t support the celebrity I’m about to replace?”

“You son of a-“

“Shhh” he says and walks over to me, so he and I stand side by side. He places his hand on my
shoulder and I glare at him about ready to punch his smug little pretty boy face. “That’s no way
to talk to your junior now is it?” He says before letting go of me and walking towards the door. I
hear him open it and right before it swings shut I hear him speak.

“See you around senior”

My manager has seemed to have blended into the background and it pissed me off that he had
seen that little fuck boy walk all over me. I shoot my manager a glare before limping over to a
seat.

If it wasn’t for those stupid tires I wouldn’t be in need of a replacement, I close my eyes. The
memory of the crash flashes through my mind. The rain, the helmet covered in water. The wrong
choice of tiers, fifth place, screaming for them to hurry changing the wheels. The wet track, the
rush and unpredictable turn, then the flames. I feel my arm hurt in response to the memory. I
open my eyes and tisk. That stupid pretty boy won’t get the better of me. I’ll make sure of that.

Chapter one

There is no better life then the life of Emerson Darcy (temporary name)

He’s got the looks

He’s got the ladies

He’s got the money

He’s got all the cars Gucci and Prada

He’s got the world championship F1 racing medal

He’s at the top of the fucking world

Oh yeah…

He’s me
“CHEERS TO OUR CHAMPION!!!!!” They cheer, and I don’t even have a fucking clue who they
are. All I know is, they are cheering for me and that’s all I needed to know. What I was sure of
was that this was one of the best days of my life. The club playing upbeat music and my
heartbeat following the rhythm.

“Wooohoooo!” I feel a kiss on my cheek, I feel the expensive brandy being poured on my face,
my mouth wide open enjoying the taste of happiness.

“This VIP room area is exactly what our champion deserves,” a pretty woman says leaning
closer to me, her breast being pushed up by her tight dress making them appear much larger
than they are. Her tongue runs across her thin red lips. Looking back at her eyes I can tell what
she wants. I lean against the cold metal railing that prevents me from falling flat onto the second
floor where all the regular people mingle.

“Oh yeah?” I ask “what else does this champion deserve?” I ask playing into her flirting game.
To me her face was blurred but it wasn’t her face I was interested in. It was the thrill of her full
attention and me being at the center of it. I was at the center of everyone’s attention tonight. She
steps forward and says something but my ears have started ringing and right past her I see a
dark head of hair pass by. I turn to face the railing my eyes following this random person closely.
It was a guy, he was way to pretty to be a guy, with the club lights I couldn’t tell what color his
clothes were but his pants clung to him in a way that just by looking at him you knew what he
came here for. He came to get laid.

“Emerson” I hear a high flirtatious voice say and my attention is drawn to the hand on my arm. I
pull away, I hated when people thought just because I give them a little attention they could
touch me.

“Pour me another drink” I say and she smiles before walking off. I look back down to the second
floor but the dark haired guy was long gone.

———

There was no worse life then the life of Kieran Blake (temporary name)

He’s got nothing going on

He’s out of money

He’s way overdue on rent

He’s got a drug addicted mother and a teenage sister in need of being raised

He’s got a dead father and a broken family

He’s got fifth on the final F1 race of the season

He’s at rock bottom

Oh yeah,

He’s me..

“Sorry man, with no sponsors or income, we don’t even have a car, we’re taking this as a final
chapter. We gotta drop you.” My ex manager told me just this morning, with each passing hour
of the day, the news only sunk in deeper. I sit on a park bench and light a cigarette. So this was
it, one of the worst moments of my life. I chuckle at the luck I’ve got before drawing a puff of
smoke. I release it and get a buzz from my pocket.

Pulling out my phone I see a text from one of the mechanics I worked with before our small
team went to shit.

‘Hey, sorry about everything that happened, at a time like this we should just drink till we drop
right? I’ll pick you up let’s go out’

I debate on whether I feel like taking the offer, I wasn’t a people person but I also don’t want to
be so depressing that I’d end up drinking alone. I text my location and get up. The wind picked
up, it was warm as it touched my skin. I look down at my choice of clothing and find that I’m in
sweats and a t-shirt. When a car pulls up and the window rolls down I snuff out my cigarette.

“Nah man you are not coming with me looking like that, ain’t no way you’ll get laid.”

I frown, “I thought you said drinks Mat”

He smiles innocently “oh yeah that too, now get in I got some clothes in the back change real
quick.”

I sigh but get in and he takes off while I dig through a pile of clothes that look very questionable.
I pull what seems to be a knot of just strings.

“Dude what the fuck” I say disgusted and he glaces through the rear view mirror with a sly smile.

“Oh that’s not mine, that was last nights one night stand.” He says and I quickly toss the thing as
far as it can possibly get.

“You are actually disgusting, are any of these yours or all your fuck buddies clothes?”
He laughs, “look deep enough and you should find something of mine.”

I sigh before pulling out a pair of leather skinny pants, there were cuts in the thighs and the side
seams were held together with strings. Typically, what a stripper would wear. I sigh again.

“Maybe I shouldn’t go” I say and Mat frowns,

“No! I’m keeping you out, otherwise you’d sulk for the rest of your life. Now get changed, we’re
almost there.” I flip him off before removing my pants and shoving my legs into the leather
pants. They surprisingly fit well and were comfortable. I half tucked my t-shirt, finger combed my
hair and decided that this was the last time I’d ever borrow clothes from Mat.

“Wear these with that, you still look plain” Mat says quickly pointing to a pile of earrings, chokers
and other questionable things in his cup holder. I finger through until I find earring studs and I
clip on a couple leather wristbands.

“Come on pick something good” Mat whines turning into a parking lot to a club. I frown at him

“No, it’s this or I go home,” I say and he pouts.

“You’re no fun,” he says before grabbing a choker with a bell on it and clips it on his neck.

“You are one kinky son of a bitch,” I say and he smiles, he was a smart guy but I knew too many
of his personal habits. His very very questionable habits.

“Let’s go party pooper” he says getting out of the car. I follow and reach for a pocket to tuck my
phone and ID. We flash our ID cards and then we are hit with the loud music and sweaty wet
bodies. I take a breath before I tell Mat I’m going to find some drinks. And he goes off to find a
partner for the night. I push through the crowd of people looking for a bar and a place to sit. I
feel someone grab my hand and I’m tugged in a random direction.

“Hey! What the-

I’m cut off when I see a bar and stools to sit on. I look at the person who has let go of my hand.
He was a guy, a handsome one.

“How did you…?” I trail off and the handsome man smiles.

“You had the look of ‘you are in desperate need of a drink but were lost’ sorry if I read you
wrong,” he says and I shake my head.

“No, you are very much correct,” I say walking over to the bar I sit down and he sits next to me.
“Mind if I buy you a drink?” He asks and I nod, it would be free for me so why should I refuse? I
liked men, women just never did it for me and I was okay with that. I was never good in
relationships though it was always….

“You don’t even care about me let’s break up!”

“Then can I have the keychain I gave you back? I could get some good money for it”

Proceeds to throw keychain at my face….

Yeah and the second ended basically the same,

“You’re so emotionless all the time! All you care about is stupid cars! I’m done with you!”

“So do you want your sweatshirt back or…”

Proceeds to take sweatshirt back and now I’m left cold….

Yeah I was better with just sex, no feeling just pleasure. I smile leaning in towards the
handsome man before me.

“I could go for a few drinks, what do you say?” He looks at my lips and that’s all I need to know
that he’s in to me.

——-

The handsome man has me pinned against the seats of his car my legs around his waist and
his hands in my hair. I moan out and he curses before we both finish. He sits up looking down at
me

“That was fucking amazing, can we go for another round?” He asks and I pull him in for another
kiss before we’re at it again. And temporarily I forget just how sucky my entier day has been.

——

I walk up the stairs to my apartment complex, I knew my mom and sister were long past out
considering it was 3 am and Jamie had school. Right before punching in the code I hear an old
man voice speak.

“You shoulda already been home kid, yur sister was askin bout ya” I turn to see my landlord who
lives next door. He was a good old man but no one is ever truly friends with their landlord.

“I already know I’m overdue, I’ll get you the money by the end of the week,” I say and the
landlord nods,
“Get on to bed, we all got a long day tomorrow” I nod and get into my apartment. I hear the
sound of laughter from the Tv. It was dark except for a flickering light flashing on my mothers
face. She was long passed out and I turned off the TV, pulled a blanket over her and cleaned
up the bag of chips and soda cans. I throw out the pizza box and that’s when I see the pill
bottles, I sigh before looking back at my mom. I brush the hair out of her face seeing the lines of
frowning between her brows. A part of me feels something about seeing her life this, it’s been
years but every time I just can never get entirely used to it. I turn away and head to my sister's
mini room. I quietly open the door. I hear the sound of her breathing and her covers and pillow
are thrown onto the floor. I smile at her crazy sleeping habits. I picked up her blankets and
pillow, resting them on her and tossing the pillow beside her. She shifts before hugging the
pillow. I pat her head and turn to exit the room.

Then my eyes catch the photo on her desk. It was a family photo from 8 years ago, one year
before things went all the wrong ways

My father was still alive

“Honey come on let’s take a picture with the beautiful view” my father said with five year old
Jamie on his shoulders, they both stood out in the sun shining bright while my mom and I sat in
the shade pale as ghosts. My mom sighs before a mini smile appears on her face.

“Come Kieran, let’s make them happy” she says and I smile when I hear Jamie giggle,

“Come on Keykey!!!” She yells, we walk barefoot in the tall grass and look into the camera our
dad set up.

“Everyone say cheeese!” He says and we all huddle close.

“Cheeeeeeseeee!”

——.

I sigh before turning away, there was no point in thinking of the past now. I got too much on my
mind to be thinking about these types of things. I step out of Jamie’s room closing the door
quietly.

———

Emerson pov

“Hmmm, hm, hmmm, hmm” I hum my way out of the elevator and stumbling up to the penthouse
my brother owns. I reach for the door but before I even have the chance to swipe the card to get
in, the door flies open. I stumble before looking up at my brother. Side by side we had nothing
but our eyes shape in common but we were brothers regardless.

“How did you know it was me?” I slur, my brother eyes me up and down taking in the kiss marks
all over me and the state of my clothes.

“Did you have another one night stand?” He asks looking disgusted and I shrug

“You know I’m not a kid right, I’m 27” I say scoffing and he pulls me into the house before
smacking me over the head.

“Shut up and go shower you reek of sex and alcohol you idiot, did you drink any water?” He
asks and I smile.

“Lots,”I say and he looks at me with a flat looks before sighing,

“Kids give me a headache, go get some water and rest before I inform father how you came
home today.” He says walking away and I stumble up the stairs. I’m walking along the hallway
before I catch my reflection in the mirror. I take in my looks and smile.

“I’m handsome” I say to myself running a hand through my hair,

“I’m a pro racer” I chuckle

“There is no better life then mine” I say my happiness still at its peak

I turn away and head towards my room. I step in and close the door so I lean against it.

——

Kieran pov

I step into my directly across from Jamie’s, it was dark but it got even darker once I shut the
door to lean against it.

I sigh, “what a day”

—— Emerson’s pov

I smile letting out a delighted sigh, my lights were still on and in my drunken state everything
looked so bright.

I chuckle, “what a day”