Can I Be Your One?

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/13182618.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: M/M
Fandom: | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Relationship: Jeon Jungkook/Kim Seokjin | Jin
Character: Jeon Jungkook, Kim Taehyung | V, Kim Seokjin | Jin, Park Jimin (BTS)
Additional Tags: Christmas Fluff, Christmas Eve, Confessions, First Kiss, First Love,
seriously this is so soft, ALL THE FLUFF, Humor, Pining, jk just loves sk
a lot, (he's me), minor vmin, Flashbacks, Awkward Jeon Jungkook,
Sleepy Cuddles, Canon Compliant, jjk is seokjin's baby dont touch me
im sof
Stats: Published: 2017-12-28 Words: 6547

Can I Be Your One?

by endearings

Summary

“Gukkie? Baby, is that you?”

Seokjin’s voice is thick with sleep, his eyes bleary and dark with exhaustion, but still, even
at two in the morning, he spares Jeongguk a dimpled smile.

Jeongguk’s heart skips a beat.

(alternatively: Jeongguk is in love with Seokjin and doesn't know how to tell him)

Notes

MERRY CHRISTMAS MY LOVES :D jokes listen ik i'm late but!! i've been super busy
with school and whatnot and this is, believe it or not, the first full fic I've finished since
bloody summer and I love it lots (I hope u do too) I have a lot wips rn too and hopefully I'll
get?? two of them posted before break ends hehe but with that said pls enjoy and drop me a
comment if u liked it and whatnot <3

See the end of the work for more notes

When Jeongguk was young, he had a tendency to cling. He would slip into his parents’ bedroom
and under the covers to cuddle with them, drag along his teddy bear wherever he went, even shriek
at the top of his lungs if his puppy turned away from him.
But that was then; this is now.

Now, he’s leaner and broader and an adult, Jeongguk tells himself firmly. He’s not fifteen
anymore, not a little kid his members will indulge, not -

“Gukkie? Baby, is that you?”

Seokjin’s voice is thick with sleep, his eyes bleary and dark with exhaustion, but still, even at two
in the morning, he spares Jeongguk a dimpled smile.

Jeongguk’s heart skips a beat.

“Hyung,” he greets, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. He has a blanket held in one hand, a
fluffy thing that he keeps hidden under his bed for evenings like these. “Hey.”

“Hey yourself,” Seokjin yawns, his endearingly bendy fingers covering his mouth. Jeongguk
watches him nervously, shifting his feet and fisting his hands in his blanket, unconsciously curled
into himself. “You coming in?”

Jeongguk sends Seokjin a grateful grin. He’s still standing awkwardly by the doorway but now he
lets the door creak open a little wider before stepping in, socked feet moving delicately across the
hardwood floor, his blanket heavy around his shoulders.

Seokjin laughs quietly when Jeongguk finally reaches his bed. “Don’t worry about being loud,
Guk. Yoongi is in Hoseok’s room tonight.”

“Oh.” Jeongguk lets his head fall into the crook of Seokjin’s shoulder then, shaking his blanket off
so that he can wrap it over him too. It’s an unconscious gesture, something he’s learned to do after
years of being together, and when he cuddles into Seokjin’s side, it’s with a small yawn. “Wh-
what’s the deal with them anyway, hyung? Are they dating?”

Seokjin hums noncommittally. “Who knows? They’re cute together and I’ve asked, but Yoongichi
is private, even with me.”
“ Huh,” Jeongguk wraps both of his arms around Seokjin’s slim waist before nudging into his
shoulder again. He feels unbearably sleepy like this, snug against Seokjin’s ever present warmth,
his firm chest and his broad shoulders. “I hope they are. Hoseok hyung is good for Yoongi hyung
like - they bring out the best in each other, y’know?”

Carefully, Seokjin untangles Jeongguk’s arms from around his waist. Jeongguk turns to ask him
why, a small pout on his lips, but his question dies when he sees that Seokjin is getting under the
covers instead. He pats the space next to him and Jeongguk scrambles, cheeks flushing red when
he hears Seokjin laugh.

Nudging one of his legs in between Jeongguk’s, Seokjin tangles their limbs together until they’re
so close to one another that Jeongguk doesn’t know where he begins and Seokjin ends. “Yeah,”
Seokjin agrees, dragging his hand down the curve of Jeongguk’s spine, picking up the
conversation where they left off. “They fit together like puzzle pieces, it’s - it’s nice.”

And then, so quietly Jeongguk almost doesn’t catch it, “I kind of wish I had something like that.”

Seokjin’s voice is oddly wistful, a little sad and a little empty. Jeongguk gently presses closer,
burying his face into Seokjin’s chest, arms winding around his waist to keep him close. “But you
have me,” Jeongguk reminds him, voice muffled against the material of Seokjin’s shirt.

Seokjin tucks his chin further into the crown of Jeongguk’s head. “Yeah,” he murmurs, patting
Jeongguk’s back the way he likes it, slow and gentle, a soothing lullaby just for him. “At least I
have you, baby.”

When Jeongguk wakes, it’s to sleepy faces and knowing grins. Jimin stands above him, his arms
crossed over his chest, a self-assured smile stretching his eyes into folds of mirth; Taehyung, on the
other hand, has bleary eyes and a sad pout, swaying on his feet where he stands.

“Had fun?” asks Jimin, leaning down close when he sees that Jeongguk’s cracked an eye open, his
grin growing.

Jeongguk glares. “More fun than you, I’m sure.”

Without missing a beat, Jimin nods. “Definitely,” he agrees. “Taehyungie here is a lovely cuddler,
but I don’t think he’s ever called me his baby .”

Sleepily, Taehyung shuffles closer to Jimin, arms winding around his waist with practiced ease. “I
can,” his voice is soft, still heavy with sleep, his head lolling onto Jimin’s shoulder. “If you want
me to, that is. Baby. Jiminie, my lovely little ba-”

Jimin clears his throat, spots of colour blooming on his cheeks. “Yes, well,” gently, he pushes
Taehyung off him, ignoring his pout when he turns back around to face Jeongguk. “As I was
saying, Jinnie hyung called you his -”

“Baby?”

Jeongguk perks up a little, sitting forwards in bed with Seokjin’s pillow clutched in his hands.
“Hyung! It’s still only seven in the morning, why did you leave?”

Seokjin laughs, picking his way through Jimin and Taehyung to get back into bed with Jeongguk.
“Jetlag,” he smiles, ruffling Jeongguk’s hair fondly before nodding at the pair staring resolutely at
them. “Thing 1 and Thing 2 come to get you?”

Jimin splutters unattractively whereas Taehyung giggles, accepting the title easily. “No,”
Jeongguk says decisively, snuggling into Seokjin’s side, ignoring Taehyung’s gawk. He pouts.
“They came to tease.”

“Poor baby,” Seokjin clucks, glaring at Jimin and Taehyung. “He trusts you enough to tell you
about his nightmares, and you’re mean enough to tease him for it?”

Jeongguk stiffens.

“ Oh ,” Jimin’s voice is high and breathless, undoubtedly delighted. “What’s this, Jeonggukie?
You have nightmares ?”

Seokjin looks back and forth between them, unsure. “Yes? Why else do you think he’s been
sleeping with me lately?”
“No reason,” Jimin says nonchalantly, but to his terror, Jeongguk can see the mischief glinting in
his gaze. “I just hadn’t realized nightmare was a euphemism for having a cru-”

“Hyung!” Jeongguk interrupts loudly, wringing his hands together as he shoots Jimin a pleading
look. “You um - you said you were jetlagged, yeah? We’ll let you be then, get some rest and don’t
worry about breakfast, we can fix it ourselves.”

He scrambles out of bed, ignoring Seokjin’s confused look when he drags Taehyung and Jimin out
by scruffs of their shirts. It’s only when they’re all back in his room, the door shut firmly and
locked, that Jeongguk lets himself breathe again.

He narrows his eyes at Jimin and Taehyung. “That was mean .”

“No,” Jimin plops face first onto Jeongguk’s bed, bringing Taehyung down with him. Their hands
twine together, Jimin’s rings glinting against Taehyung’s bare skin, and as Jeongguk watches them,
he feels strangely upset. “ Mean would be lying to get what I want; mean would be tricking my
naive hyung into believing that I have nightmares, so he’ll let me slip into his bed at night; mean
would be -”

Jimin cuts off when Jeongguk makes a sad noise in the back of his throat, his eyes flashing pity.
“Guk,” his voice is soft and a little apologetic but for the most part, firm. “I understand that you
like him, but you need to be a little more tactile, okay? This isn’t getting you anywhere.”

“I know ,” Jeongguk groans, burying his face in his hands. He’s sitting at the foot of his own bed,
too upset to join the cuddle puddle happening above him. “But at least this way I can get a few
hugs out of him, y’know? If I weren’t having nightmares , hyung would kick me out his room in a
heartbeat.”

“You don’t know that.” Jimin is carding his fingers through Taehyung’s hair now, Taehyung dead
asleep next him, his face buried in Jimin’s chest, and the look on Jimin’s face is so, so tender.
“Hyung has a soft spot for you, Jeongguk. Do you think that if it was anyone else, he would let
them into his bed at two in the morning?”

Jeongguk huffs. “No,” he admits reluctantly, slumping back against the foot of his bed. “Probably
not.”
(Because even if Jeongguk is aware that Seokjin doesn’t see him the way he wants to be seen, he
does know that he’s lucky to get as much as he does; Seokjin is a creature of habit, with strict rules
concerning his personal space and his private time, but for Jeongguk, he bends them.

“ Come in ,” he’ll gesture, if Jeongguk were to appear in his room at four in the morning with
sleep-dark eyes and a threadbare blanket.

“ Of course ,” he’ll grin, deep dimples and petal-pink lips, if Jeongguk were to ask Seokjin to take
him out for food in the dead of night.

“ My lovely Jeongguk-ah ,” he’ll laugh, winded and high and unbearably sweet, if Jeongguk were
to back hug him, arms creeping around his chest to lock over his heart.)

“But I like him so much ,” Jeongguk says miserably, finally getting up and shoving Jimin to the
side so he can wallow in his bed in peace. He lies flat on his back, staring at the ceiling, speckled
white and blue from miscellaneous paint. “And I don’t know what else to do.”

“Tell him the truth, maybe?”

Jimin’s gaze, when Jeongguk looks at him, is sincere. “Do I have to?” he asks, turning over and
clutching his pillow, kicking his legs childishly at Jimin’s gentle nod. “What would I even say?
Hey, hyung, not to be totally weird or anything, but I’ve maybe had a crush on you since the day
we met?”

Jimin laughs quietly, pressing his hands over Taehyung’s ears so as not to wake him up. “Again,”
he says calmly, the dredges of a smile still lingering on his lips. “A little more tactile, please.”

“Tactile how ?” Jeongguk demands, frustrated.

A smile, impish and a little worrisome, spreads wide over Jimin’s features. “I don’t know about
you,” Jimin begins, voice high with mischief, “but I might have a plan.”

❄
When Jeongguk was a trainee, he was shy. It was a terrible trait to have, not because he could
barely interact with others, but because he couldn’t be himself.

He remembers it very distinctly; fourteen years old and barely more than a wisp of a person, he
stood in a room of teenagers, scared shittless and fumblingly awkward. He didn't say anything to
anyone, didn't crack a grin, didn't wave a greeting -

Instead, Jeongguk stood in a corner before sinking to the floor of the dance studio in utter dread,
burying his head in his arms. He felt so alone in that second, so desperate, that he hadn’t noticed a
figure joining him.

“Hey,” the voice was soft, a little worried and a little unsure. “Hey, you okay, kid?”

It was a kind voice , Jeongguk thought. kind and unassuming.

Timidly he raised his head, drinking in the face before him.

Pretty, dark eyes and a slim face; rosebud lips, twisted into worried frown, a high-bridged nose,
and gentle features.

“ Yah,” he poked Jeongguk in the arm without much force, as if he was afraid of breaking him. “If
you're not okay, you should tell me. I'm your hyung, yeah? Seokjin hyung. We're going to be
together for a while, and as the youngest, you should come to me if you have a problem, okay?”

Jeongguk didn’t say anything, but still, Seokjin stood there, unblinking and firm, strong in the face
of an unwavering gaze.

“Okay,” jeongguk nodded eventually, letting his fingers unfurl from where they had been clenched
into fists. He gave Seokjin a hesitant smile, taking the hand he was offered to bring himself up, but
stepping back a little when he realized just how big Seokjin was.

From this angle, the age difference between them was startlingly clear; Seokjin had broad
shoulders and slim hips, arm muscles well defined, lean under his caramel skin; he was so pretty in
that second, so confident, that Jeongguk felt himself shrink a little, but Seokjin didn’t seem to
notice it.
Instead, he tangled his fingers with Jeongguk’s, a charming grin curving his eyes into half moons
of warmth.

Jeongguk’s breath caught in his throat.

“It’s your first day here, right? Seokjin’s grin grew wider when Jeongguk nodded a hesitant yes.
“Tell you what - how about we ditch?”

Jeongguk stared at him, uncertain of what Seokjin just said. “Excuse me?”

“Ditch,” Seokjin repeated patiently, ruffling Jeongguk’s hair with fond eyes. “Trust me - the
director isn’t even here today and they were planning on cancelling class; you won’t be missed.”

Gnawing his bottom lip, Jeongguk scuffed his shoe along the ground, hesitant.

“Hey,” Seokjin’s voice was soft, his eyes gentle when Jeongguk met his gaze. “If you don’t want
to, then it’s okay. I just thought it would be fun.”

“Um,” Jeongguk rocked back and forth on his heels, bottom lip still bitten between his teeth. “If
you - if you’re sure they won’t notice us gone, and, um, if you’re okay with taking me -”

“I’m more than okay,” Seokjin interrupted him, lips slipping into a crooked smile. “And they
definitely won’t notice, Jeongguk-ah.”

“Okay,” Jeongguk let himself grin, then. Seokjin had mischief in his gaze, warmth in the set of his
shoulders, trust in his eyes, and Jeongguk was inexplicably drawn towards him, in that second.
“Okay, hyung. Let’s go.”

They snuck quietly out the backdoor, Seokjin’s warm hand latched onto Jeongguk’s shoulder.
Jeongguk stumbled behind him awkwardly, shooting furtive glances behind his back every so
often, nervous and unsure but excited .
Utterly excited.

“Hyung,” he panted, unconsciously reaching forward to tangle his hand with Seokjin’s, the effort
of having to keep up with a pair of legs twice as long as his finally catching up to him. “Where, um,
are we going?”

Seokjin pulled him along, whistling a low tune under his breath. “You’ll see,” he said vaguely,
sending Jeongguk a small grin when they reached the end of the corridor, front teeth peeking out
cutely. “It’s a surprise.”

Jeongguk blinked at him owlishly, but forgot his question altogether when Seokjin pushed him
gently through the doors.

It was windy outside, a breeze dancing through their hair to twist it into knots, playing across their
skin and biting at their clothes. Jeongguk shivered in his ratty tank, narrow shoulders shaking and
teeth chattering, the December air hitting him, sudden and unforgiving.

Seokjin tsked under his breath when he saw Jeongguk. “C’mere,” he scolded quietly, wrapping an
arm over Jeongguk’s shoulders to keep him close, a hand rubbing up and down whatever skin he
could reach. “Why didn’t you take a jacket, Gukkie? It’s winter for goodness sake.”

“D-dd-d-didn’t know it would be this c-c-cold,” Jeongguk stuttered, biting down so hard he almost
bit his lip. Seokjin’s hand was warm and comforting, the nickname that he let naturally slip
endearing. “Hadn’t planned on g-going out today.”

Seokjin huffed under his breath before coming to a stop, hand tangled tightly with Jeongguk’s.
Carefully, he shrugged out of his jacket and let it settle over Jeongguk’s narrow frame instead,
fabric dwarfing him.

Jeongguk stared at him, shocked and a little confused. “Hyung,” he mumbled, the jacket pooling
around his waist to collect at his knees, giving way to his ripped jeans. “Aren’t you cold? It’s fine,
I can just hang on for a while -”

“Yah,” Seokjin interrupted, taking Jeongguk’s hand again to drag him along, the set of his
shoulders determined. Goosebumps erupted across the bare skin of his arm, and even though he
was acting indifferent, Jeongguk could tell the wind was bothering him. “What kind of hyung
would I be if I let you suffer out here? I told you I would take care of you, Jeongguk-ah; I’m not
backing down that easily.”

Jeongguk felt a smile, soft and shy and unbearably adoring break out over his face. “Okay,” he
agreed quietly, skipping ahead so that his pace matched with Seokjin’s, the thud of their feet hitting
the cement in tandem. “If you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” Seokjin said firmly, hugging himself and squeezing, the tip of his nose pink with cold.
“Absolutely, one hundred percent sure, Jeonggukie.”

“Then I’m sure too,” Jeongguk said, and before Seokjin could even look at him, he grabbed
Seokjin’s hand and slipped it into the pocket of his jacket, fingers fitted together tightly, warm and
soft and lovely. “We can take care of each other.”

Seokjin, when Jeongguk stared at him, had cheeks flushed with warmth, crimson against the
smooth honey of his skin. The tips of his ears were red, too, and his bottom lip was pursed as if in
thought , but even then, after knowing him for barely more than hour, Jeongguk could tell he was
pleased.

“The audacity of kids these days,” Seokjin huffed under his breath, using his other hand (the one
not in Jeongguk’s pocket) to ruffle his hair fondly, a smile dancing across his lips, warm and
sweet. “But thank you.”

“Only for you, hyung,” Jeongguk grinned cheekily, unsurprised when Seokjin slapped him lightly
upside the head with a scoff.

“Brat,” but it was said fondly, the lilt of the words adoring, and Jeongguk knew Seokjin liked him
more than he was letting on.

It kept him grinning the rest of the day.

They didn’t do much after that; Seokjin dragged him into a street corner shop and bought a
pusheen jacket with a fat wallet hidden in his back pocket (jeongguk’s jaw had dropped when he’d
seen it - his hyung was banking )
The jacket itself was cute. There were ears attached to the hoodie and a fat, floppy tail dangled
from the back, Jeongguk using it to trail after Seokjin like a lost puppy. Seokjin laughed when he
saw what Jeongguk was doing, cooing with his hands shoved in his pockets, and the thing is,
Jeongguk could’ve let go; could’ve easily followed him through Seoul without doing that, but even
back then -

Even back then, Jeongguk would do anything to make Seokjin laugh.

And so the day went, the sky clear and the air fraught with chill. Seoul was bustling this time, but
Jeongguk latched tightly onto Seokjin’s jacket and followed behind him dutifully, cheeks pink with
cold and eyes bright with excitement.

They ate Hotteok from a street food stall just by the edge of Gangnam, fingers sticky with sweet
sugar. Seokjin paid for that too, refusing to take no for an answer even when Jeongguk pushed out
his bottom lip, widening his eyes in a sad attempt to woo him.

“Hyunggggg,” Jeongguk whined, tugging on the end of Seokjin’s jacket, gaze pleading. “Please? I
have money too, y’know, I’m not broke -”

Seokjin laughed, high and squeaky and sweet, his fingers ruffling through Jeongguk’s hair again.
“You’re such a baby , Jeonggukkie, how cute.”

“ ‘m not .”

“You kind of are.”

“Hyung, no , look, lemme buy you something, please? I want to say thank you for taking me out,
when - when you didn’t have to.”

When Seokjin looked at him, his eyes were soft, dark brown and flickering with warmth. “Hey,” he
said quietly, previous argument forgotten, voice firm and honest and kind . “You know I had a lot
of fun today, right? Without you, I would’ve had to spend today alone, and it’s - it was a good day,
Jeonggukkie, okay? Taking you out was never the issue and if anyone needs to say thank you, it’s
me.”

Jeongguk stared at him, shocked and a little overwhelmed by just how fierce Seokjin sounded.
“Okay,” he nodded mutely, still trying to process everything he’d just been told.

“Thank you,” Seokjin said, shoulders relaxing, his hand gentle when he twined his fingers with
Jeongguk’s . “Let’s go back to the dorms, yeah? It’s getting late.”

Jeongguk nodded again, letting himself be pulled along, Seokjin’s skin warm against his.
Somewhere along the way, it started snowing; it build up along the ground in waves of fleecy
white, stuck to their hair and got caught in the buttons of Jeongguk’s coat.

Seokjin laughed when he saw Jeongguk trying to catch snowflakes with his tongue, bending over
in the middle of the road to giggle, breaths coming out in airy puffs. “You’re a baby. ” he said
again, ignoring Jeongguk’s pout .

“Am not,” Jeongguk stomped his foot, unaware of the irony.

“You are,” Seokjin stood then, dusting the knees of his jeans, hands wet with snow. “But you’re
my baby.”

Seokjin cooed when the tips of Jeongguk’s ears turned red, letting out a little snicker when he
didn’t protest.

A little while later, after they’d started walking again and the flush had faded from Jeongguk’s
cheeks, Seokjin brought them to a sudden stop, turning Jeongguk around to face a frozen lake a
little ways away. They’d taken the back road back to their dorms so it would be easier to get in
undetected, and it was dark, but Jeongguk could still vaguely make out what Seokjin was trying to
show him.

The lake was circular, reflecting the moon on its surface; trees were littered around it in a faintly
round shape, bare branches swaying in the wind, and despite the darkness, Jeongguk felt safe with
Seokjin next to him.

“I wish we could go ice skating,” Seokjin said softly, his voice wistful and a little uneven.

“Why can’t we?”

Seokjin sent him a sad grin. “Well firstly, we don’t have ice skates with us; but even if we did, it’s
against company rules - we could hurt ourselves, I guess, and that wouldn’t be good considering
we’re trainees.”

Jeongguk hummed in understanding. He scuffed his shoe along the grass, disappointed, when a
sudden thought occurred to him. “Hyung?”

“Yeah, Jeongguk?”

“Do you think,” Jeongguk began hesitantly, feeling shy despite having spent the day with Seokjin,
“that if, um, we weren’t trainees anymore - like, if we debuted together, I mean - could we go ice
skating then?”

Seokjin turned to look at him, eyes soft. “I’m sure we would be able to,” he said kindly, linking his
arm with Jeongguk’s. “If we debut, that is.”

“We will,” Jeongguk assured him, turning away from the lake to trudge through the layers of snow,
determined. “And when we do, I’ll bring you back here, hyung. You’ll see.”

Seokjin gave him a breathless laugh. “I’ll hold you to that, Jeonggukkie.”

“ You - you really think I should take him back there, hyung?” Jeongguk asks, bottom lip caught
between his teeth. He feels doubtful when he remembers that; it was the first time he met Seokjin,
the first time he fell into like with Seokjin, and if Seokjin happened to reject him, then -

Jeongguk doesn’t want to lose one of the places he keeps closest to his heart.

“Jeongguk,” Jimin pokes him in the cheek, a small smile quirking his lips upwards. Taehyung is
still lying next to him, sound asleep with his head tucked into Jimin’s chest, snuffling every so
often, and Jeongguk envies how comfortable they seem together in that second. “Sweetie, you tell
me this story at least three times a week and it’s been years , for fuck’s sake.”
Jeongguk sniffs. “I’ll have you know that I only tell you that, everyone else has only heard it once.”

“No,” Taehyung mumbles sleepily from where his lips are pressed against Jimin’s shirt. “Y-you
tell me it lots, too, but its ‘kay; I don’t mind.”

Jimin raises his eyebrows meaningfully. “Jeongguk, tomorrow is Christmas and it’s snowing and
you have connections , now, too. It’s the perfect time to confess.”

“I-I dunno, hyung. I mean, I’ve always had a plan, but -”

“Hey,” Jimin sits up carefully, arranging Taehyung’s head on his lap when he settles. “Me and
Taehyung will help you too, Jeonggukkie, okay? Whatever it is, it’ll be amazing.”

“Will it?” asks Jeongguk, doubtful.

“It will,” Jimin says firmly, beaming at Jeongguk with a bright grin. “Hyung will love it.”

Jeongguk is nervous.

Seokjin is standing in front of him with a bleary smile and sleep-dark eyes, a blanket wrapped
endearingly around his shoulders. “Hey, baby,” he mumbles. His voice is groggy and a little raspy,
and when he pushes his hair off of his forehead, Jeongguk flushes.

He always forgets just how breathless Seokjin makes him.

“Hey,” Jeongguk says, the tips of his ears burning when he realizes Seokjin is watching him
fondly. It’s still only eight in the morning, and the rest of their members are still sleeping, but
Jeongguk has been up since six , jittery with nerves. “Hyung, I was wondering -”

“It’s too early for that,” Seokjin interrupts him tiredly. He leans forward and grabs Jeongguk by the
waist, ignoring his squeak of protest when he pulls Jeongguk into him. “Come back to bed with
me. I missed you last night.”

“Oh.” Jeongguk can feel his cheeks heat with warmth, eyes widening a little in disbelief.

Seokjin scoffs before sliding under the covers again, bringing Jeongguk with him. He tucks his feet
between Jeongguk’s legs, fists his hands into Jeongguk’s shirt, and presses his nose against the
nape of Jeongguk’s neck, breathing him in. “If you didn’t come because Jimin and Taehyung were
teasing you, then you know you should just ignore them, right? I can tell them to stop if you want,
baby, it’s not a big deal.”

“No,” Jeongguk says hesitantly, having to swallow past the sudden lump lodged in his throat. “No,
hyung, that’s not why. I just thought you could use a break, is all.”

For a second, Seokjin is quiet. But then, he slips his fingers under Jeongguk’s shirt, touch traveling
lightly over the dips and ridges of his abs, and pinches .

Jeongguk shrieks, muffling the sound into Seokjin’s pillow. “Why,” he groans, rubbing the skin of
his stomach and flinching at the residing pain, “did you do that.”

“Because you’re an idiot,” Seokjin says. His tone is very matter of fact, but his lips, when
Jeongguk looks at him, are tilted down at the corners. “If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a
thousand times. I like taking care of you, Jeongguk. We - “

“We take care of each other,” Jeongguk finishes for him, unable to stop the grin splitting across his
face. “Yeah. I know, hyung.”

Seokjin is quiet. He presses closer against Jeongguk, wiggling his feet and sighing happily when
Jeongguk winds his arms around his waist. Quiet settles between them, Seokjin’s hand rubbing
circles onto Jeongguk’s back, his touch warm and comforting.

A few minutes later, after Jeongguk is almost sure Seokjin has fallen asleep, he remembers.
“Hyung?” he asks, dragging a finger down Seokjin’s spine, breath hitching when Seokjin noses
into the hollow of his throat. “Um, about before, I was gonna ask if - if you could keep tonight
free? I know it’s Christmas eve and you’re probably busy, but I really, um. Want to take you out, if
you’ll let me.”
Seokjin hums, a soft sound of acknowledgment that has Jeongguk smiling. “I’ll let you,” he
answers sleepily, voice low and certain. “I’m always free for you, Jeonggukkie.”

Hours later, after Jeongguk has snuck out of Seokjin’s bed and panicked for the majority of the day,
he deems himself ready.

It’s dark outside now, wind whistling through to pierce the night, a fierce chill lingering in the air.
Jeongguk hops from foot to foot, cheeks puffed out and hands shoved in his pockets, hair flopping
over his forehead in a sleek, styled part.

Jimin had done it for him with hairspray and a blow dryer; Taehyung, on the other hand, declared
himself Jeongguk’s stylist and dressed him in ripped black jeans, a collared white shirt open at the
neck, and a pair of loafers that shine in the low light of their dorm.

Jeongguk likes the leather jacket best - Taehyung had forced him into it and it hangs languidly
from his shoulders, fitted tight around his arms, but looser near his waist.

It makes him look like a man.

“Okay,” he says, studying himself in the mirror, Jimin and Taehyung standing behind him. “This is
good, right? I look good?”

“You look hot,” Taehyung grins at him wolfishly, eyes lingering on the curve of his ass. “I’d tap
that.”

Jimin gives him a scowl. “Shut up,” he tells Taehyung, but when he looks at Jeongguk, his eyes are
fond. “But yeah, gukkie, he’s right. 10/10 Jin hyung would bang.”

“Okay,” Jeongguk says again, taking a deep breath, straightening his jacket and playing with his
piercings. “I got this. I just need to - need to - “

“Breathe,” Jimin says gently, massaging his shoulders before swiveling him around and pushing
him out the door. “You’ll be fine, Jeonggukkie, okay? Me and taehyung are only a phone call away
if you aren’t.”
Jeongguk nods. He pulls the two of them into a hug, squeezing tightly and hoping they understand.
“Thank you for helping me. I don’t how well this is going to turn out but just - I wouldn’t have
been able to do this without your help.”

Taehyung squeezes him tightly. “Go get ‘em, bun.”

Jeongguk knocks on the door of Seokjin and Yoongi’s room, heart thumping frantically against his
chest.

“ Coming! ” shouts Seokjin, and Jeongguk nods before he realizes Seokjin isn’t even here to see
him.

Tiredly, he rests his head against the door. They haven’t done anything yet and he’s already a
mess, too many thoughts and worries -

The door opens, then, and Jeongguk falls head first into Seokjin’s chest.

fan- fucking -tastic.

Seokjin stumbles backwards, his arms looped over Jeongguk’s waist. A breathless laugh spills out
of him when he catches his footing, just barely managing to keep from hitting the ground, but
Jeongguk keeps his face buried in his chest, mortified.

“Sorry,” he whispers, fingers curled into the hem of Seokjin’s thick turtleneck. “ Shit , hyung, I’m
sorry, I’m a mess, I -”

“Gukkie,” Seokjin says softly, a smile in his voice. “No harm done, yeah? You’re fine, baby, I
promise.”

“Still,” Jeongguk says miserably, finally meeting Seokjin’s gaze. He’s not surprised when he finds
how kind his eyes are. “I almost knocked you out.”
“But you didn’t,” Seokjin says firmly. He takes Jeongguk by the hand and gives him a pretty grin,
lips curving upwards sweetly. “Now lets go, hm? I’ve been looking forward to this all day.”

Before Jeongguk can process his words, Seokjin is dragging him out the door and into the cold
night. There’s a cab waiting for them, courtesy of Jimin, and Seokjin gives a squeak of excitement
when he sees it, squeezing Jeongguk’s hand tightly. “Jeongguk-ah, you didn’t have to do this. I
would’ve been fine walking.”

“Well, yeah,” Jeongguk murmurs shyly, rubbing the back of his neck and refusing to meet
Seokjin’s gaze. “But it’s you, hyung; of course I did it.”

He doesn’t give Seokjin a chance to say anything. Instead, Jeongguk opens the door for him and
guides him into the taxi before making his way to the other side. The ride there is quiet; Jeongguk,
whenever he’s nervous, tends to be clingy and shy and anxious, and he sits so close to Seokjin, he’s
almost on his lap.

But Seokjin doesn’t tell him anything. Instead, he pets Jeongguk’s hair, brushes his fingers through
the strands and scratches his scalp lightly, Jeongguk leaning into his touch and sighing happily.

The cab driver lets them off a few feet away from their original destination, and Jeongguk thanks
him before getting out, leaving a fat tip and blushing when Seokjin coos at him. “Look at my
Jeonggukie,” he ruffles Jeongguk’s hair with a bright smile before pulling him into a hug, arms
twisting together tightly. “I raised you so well.”

Jeongguk squeezes him around the middle, breathing in the scent of winter wind and apples and
Seokjin . “You really did,” he murmurs, sincerity heavy in his words, lips slipping into a shy grin.
“Thank you.”

He takes Seokjin’s hand then and pulls him along down the street, until they reach the little stand
Jeongguk wanted to come to. “Oh,” Seokjin says when he sees it, features coloured with surprise.
“Isn’t this -”

“Yeah,” Jeonguk says. He grins at the warmth in Seokjin’s gaze, his heart fluttering, the feeling
achingly familiar by now. “Yeah, it is.”

This time, Jeongguk is the one who buys the Hotteok. It’s the same street stall as before, with the
same, sweet vendor, and she smiles when she sees them. Jeongguk pays her, thanking her profusely
when she adds another one in the bag, free of charge. “Does she remember us?” Seokjin asks
curiously, a flush spreading across his cheeks when Jeongguk offers him a bite.

“Dunno,” Jeongguk hums. Something warm and happy blooms in his stomach when Seokjin lets
him feed him, and Jeongguk grins, content. “ you’re pretty memorable, hyung.”

Seokjin slaps his shoulder gently, but Jeongguk can see the tips of his ears turn red, can hear the
surprised noise he makes in the back of his throat. “Shut up.”

“Never,” Jeongguk says, grinning when Seokjin links their arms together, the pace of their
footsteps matching. He feels warm and giddy all over, heat settling in the pit of his stomach.

A few minutes later, after Jeongguk has fed Seokjin about half the Hotteok, Seokjin pokes him.
“Gukkie, where are we going? You didn’t say.”

Jeongguk waves his hand vaguely, having to hide his grin. “You’ll see, hyung. It’s a surprise.”

Seokjin scoffs, but doesn’t question him further. The two of them walk down the street, hand in
hand, feeding each other bites of Hotteok every few seconds, fingers sticky sweet and warm.

Jeongguk is so in love .

They reach the lake quickly; it’s still dark, but snow has started falling, and it collects on their
clothes, melts in their hair, sticks in their skin, Jeongguk’s heart thrumming with nerves.

When they’re only a few steps away, Seokjin stops short. “Oh,” he breathes, turning around to stare
at Jeongguk with wide eyes, the light from the streetlamp bathing him in a warm glow.
“Jeonggukie, baby, you -”

“Go on,” Jeongguk tells him gently, pushing him forward until they’re in the middle of the
clearing, Seokjin’s breath catching in his throat when he’s seen what Jeongguk’s done with the
place. “It’s not much, but -”
“Jeongguk,” Seokjin says, his voice tight and a little strained. “C’mere.”

Hesitantly, Jeongguk walks forward. “It’s okay if you don’t like it, hyung. I just -”

Seokjin pulls him into a tight hug, arms winding around Jeongguk’s waist and squeezing. “I love
it,” he tells him quietly, face buried in the crook of Jeongguk’s neck. “I can’t believe you
remembered, let alone - let alone did all this .”

This alludes to what Jeongguk had dragged Taehyung and Jimin out to do a few hours earlier.

Fairy lights are strung up along the trees, wound into the branches and along the trunks. They
blink merrily in a pattern, pinpricks of light in the black night, reflecting off the surface of the lake
and glinting. Jeongguk had bought lanterns too - they’re sitting on the ground, placed haphazardly
in a glimmering aesthetic of warm light, lit underneath small sprigs of mistletoe.

If Jeongguk listens closely, he thinks he can hear Seokjin’s heart beating just as fast as his.

“Of course I remembered,” Jeongguk mumbles, petting Seokjin’s back gently, trying to keep his
voice from cracking. “I remember everything about you, hyung.”

He takes Seokjin’s hand in his, tangling their fingers together tightly. In this second, his heart is
thumping wildly against his chest, frantic and unsure; but Seokjin is in his arms, face tucked into
his shoulder, and Jeongguk isn’t going to stop now.

He takes a deep breath. “ Um - when we first came here, you said - you said that if we debuted
together, you would let me bring you back.”

When he pauses, Seokjin presses his hands against Jeongguk’s cheeks, eyes kind.

Always so, so kind.

“Go on,” he says, brushing a finger down Jeongguk’s chin. “I’m listening.”
Jeongguk nods, steeling himself. “Looking back, I feel like that was the first second I ever thought
to myself , ‘this is it. This is a hyung I want to be with for a long time.’

Seokjin gives him an encouraging nod, his hands held tightly in Jeongguk’s. “And,” Jeongguk
murmurs, his voice a little more quiet, a little more shy. “I didn’t realize it then, but for me, that
meant - that meant I liked you. I still like you, hyung, and it’s been years , I know, but nothing’s
changed.”

“Jeongguk,” Seokjin begins, fingertips still pressed into the skin of Jeongguk’s cheek, his voice
breathless. “Baby -”

“No,” Jeongguk says. He feels anxious again, Seokjin’s gaze heavy and piercing, but familiar.
“Hear me out, hyung, please. I know I’m a lot younger than you, and that I’m kind of a brat, and
that I’m not the most intuitive, but - but I like you so much, hyung.”

To his horror, Jeongguk can feel tears pricking at the back of his eyes. He’s always been sensitive,
sure, but he didn’t expect this . By now, he’s sure Seokjin can see the wet sheen of his gaze, but
Jeongguk’s come this far, and he can’t afford to stop now; not when he’s already given so much of
himself away.

“ I like taking care of you,” he sniffs a little, trying to keep his voice from cracking. “ and - and I
like that you take care of me, and that we take care of each other. I like when you tell me jokes,
when y-y-you kiss the top of my head, how broad your shoulders are. You never laugh at me, and
you let me cuddle with you at night, even when you’re exhausted, and I - I like that.”

Jeongguk’s hiccuping now, wet coughs getting caught in his throat, voice teary and upset. “I just - I
just like you , hyung.” he finishes miserably.

It’s quiet for a few seconds before Seokjin squeezes his hand. “Just me?” he asks lightly, the edges
of his eyes crinkling into laugh lines when Jeongguk finally looks at him. “You sure?”

Jeongguk sniffles. “I’m sure.”

“You’re such a baby ,” Seokjin tells him, fond and easy and a little exasperated. “The biggest,
cutest, sweetest baby, oh my God.”

“I’m - ‘m not ,” Jeongguk protests weakly, but Seokjin is looking at him with such warmth in his
eyes, he’s left reeling. Where’s the rejection? Where are the pitiful excuses? “I’m an adult , hyung,
 please.”

“No,” Seokjin says decisively. “You’re a baby, Jeongguk.”

Then, just as he’d done a few years ago, Seokjin steps forward, standing on his tiptoes to whisper
in Jeongguk’s ear. “But you’re my baby.” he murmurs, Jeongguk stumbling backwards when
Seokjin falls into him, barely catching his balance against one of the tree trunks, a pair of lips
warm against his.

They’re kissing, Jeongguk realizes dazedly.

Seokjin is kissing him, hands fisted into the material of Jeongguk’s shirt, lips warm and soft and
sweet. He tastes like hotteok and something indefinitely Seokjin, breathless noises spilling out of
him when one of Jeongguk’s hands finds its way to the small of his back to bring him closer.

Jeongguk tightens his grip around Seokjin’s waist, breath hitching in his throat when Seokjin
breaks away to kiss the corner of his mouth, fingers curled into the shoulders of Jeongguk’s jacket.
“Merry Christmas, baby,” he whispers, resting his head against Jeongguk’s chest, breath coming
out in airy puffs. “Love you.”

“Merry Christmas, hyung.” Jeongguk murmurs, locking his fingers together behind Seokjin’s back,
pressing him tighter to his chest. He feels warmer than he has this entire winter. “Love you, too.”

End Notes

...that was my first time writing for jinkook how did it go?? Again, I love comments and ik
its been,,,a super long while since I've answered (my inbox is teetering dangerously close to
three digit numbers but whatever its fine im fine I'll get there eventually) but I promise I
read every single one, and even if it takes me months I //answer//.

also! y'all should hmu on twitter/tumblr I love making friends I promise I don't bite :)

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