After reading my notes to write this topic reflection, I reconsidered what type of child I am.
What
roles do I have? And since I am a master student, what type of student I am? It did not stop at
that point. I also wondered what kind of child I wanted to be? What do I want to do when I finish
my study? What are my goals? And, what should I do?
All of these questions were started and were at their peak when we were teenagers. Where
identity development became essential. Once we can handle the crisis we can prevent ourselves
from the risks of issues such as fear, and inferiority. Also, we may not be easily swayed by the
trends or other people.
Therefore it is really important to help the child to understand about what are their roles in this
world by letting them explore and experience as many things as they can. Nowadays, everything
on social media that is viral has many people who are following the trends. Everyone wants to be
viral since we can monetize every content. Children want to be popular because of their
appearance, passion, or other unique strengths they had. They want to show it to the world via
social media.
The thing is, you may be confused about what kind of content you need to make. A strong
identity will help us produce uniqueness, rather than simply following the crowd. We do not
want to create content not just because other people have benefited from it, but also because we
believe it aligns with our values, visions, and what we truly want to express.
Questioning about our roles and goals while exploring is considered normal and necessary based
on Erikson's theory. Another theory that can help us understand identity is Marcia’s theory of
identity status, which outlines four identity paths based on the extent to which individuals
explore and commit to their identity.
Based on Social Identification theory, people are also more likely to automatically define
themselves based on their group membership by doing social categorization, and social
identification which can affect their self-esteem, encourage belonging, and may affect their
behaviors. What we need is to have a value where everyone can be anything and we are not tied
into any groups. Islam, already helps us to have a meaning in life, which is to worship Allah. We
are not differentiated based on what group we are, are from B40, M40, or T20 does not matter.
What matters is we worship Allah and obey the Islamic jurisprudence.
We know what is good and wrong, and we have a belief that Allah will help us achieve all of our
dreams because Allah has unlimited power. According to the Social Identification theory, B40
children are more likely to feel unmotivated to achieve their dreams because of the limited
resources that they have. But in the Islamic perspective, there are many ways to achieve dreams
and Allah may help us open the way when the other door is closed (financial doors). So, Islam
can help us solve the problem of self-esteem that may appear when someone trying to shape
themselves based on the available group. Because humans are unique, and we are not tied into
any group.
In Islam, what we need to do is to obey Allah’s commands and avoid his prohibitions.
Nowadays, people are also faced with issues of gender and sexual identity. Some people identify
their gender differently to their sex, and others have issues in establishing gender roles. The
parent needs to guide and treat their children based on their biological sex. The parents should be
aware that not all social expectations should be fulfilled.
While the males are expected to only work and not do home chores, you need to teach your child
about empathy and the benefit of helping others instead. By involving them in everyday tasks at
home, you're not only breaking gender stereotypes but also nurturing a more balanced sense of
self. This helps them grow into individuals who are not bound by rigid social expectations, who
are confident in doing what is right – not what people expect to be right – and who understand
that caring for others is not a weakness, but a strength. In the long run, we probably are raising
someone who is emotionally intelligent, independent, and grounded in compassion.
As a Muslim, I’ve come to realize that Islam provides clear guidance on how to live a good and
meaningful life, helping us distinguish between what is right and wrong. With this foundation,
we are better equipped to stay grounded and not be easily influenced by unrealistic or
unnecessary social expectations.
