Arcanum

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/62173579.

Rating: Mature
Archive Warning: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Category: F/M
Fandoms: 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Anime), 呪術廻戦 | Jujutsu Kaisen (Manga)
Relationships: Gojo Satoru/Iori Utahime, Gojo Satoru & Iori Utahime
Characters: Gojo Satoru, Iori Utahime
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Fantasy, Witches,
Sorcerers, Magic, Familiars, Adult Content, Eventual Smut, Sexual
Content, Power Imbalance, Power Dynamics, Forbidden Love, Utahime
is Gojo's familiar, Drama & Romance, Fluff and Angst, Angst and Feels,
Heavy Angst, Iori Utahime is So Done, Gojo Satoru is a Little Shit,
Protective Gojo Satoru, Possessive Behavior, Iori Utahime in Denial,
Gojo is oblivious, Pining, Mutual Pining, Heartache, Betrayal,
Misunderstandings, Slow Burn, Like the burn hurts, Fear not reader-
magical salve is brewin'
Language: English
Stats: Published: 2025-01-12 Updated: 2025-02-27 Words: 44,630 Chapters:
8/?
 Arcanum
by Kalistiri

Summary

Gojo Satoru is a famed sorcerer, the strongest in centuries, but he chooses to live his life as a
common witch pedaling trinkets and potions. He's fascinated by human society, and prefers
to do as he pleases, ignoring the rules the kingdom placed down on the land pertaining to
what kind of magic is and isn't allowed.

His only moral compass is his familiar, a black cat that has been at his side since he was a
kid.

His familiar, Utahime is not too keen on how he runs his business, and has slowly been losing
patience with him over the years...
 Chapter 1
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

"A touch of rosewater, a pair of fairy wings, pearl dust, a drop of morning dew, and a dash of
mint to taste~"

The basic ingredients of the fabled love ,potion that so many sought him out for.

Satoru smirked and mixed the ingredients together–in a basic soup pot that he got for fifty
percent off since it once had a glaring dent in it. All he had to do was shake it a bit and it was
good as new!

These kinds of requests were typical, but they paid good, and he couldn't care less who they
went to.

"Humans are so predictable," he said as he moved the pot off the fire.

He already knew how this would play out.

The client, a desperate woman with a homely face, would tremble in glee when he handed
her the potion. She'd grasp the glass vial in her greedy little hands and nod along to his
instructions. And he'd pocket her payment with a smile, and send her on her merry little way
as she went off to doom some poor bastard.

He picked up the ladle and took a careful sip of the contents. "Hm, should be sweeter—"

"How many times do I have to tell you? You shouldn't be tasting your potions, Gojo" his
favorite person kindly reminded him.

"Hm, and how many times do I have to ask you to call me Master?" Satoru countered with a
playful pout.

"Infinity."

He grinned and gestured to a shelf above him. "Don't tempt me, Hime-dear, I actually can
achieve such a feat, now could you get the sugar for me?"

The black cat at his feet huffed in annoyance and jumped up to the shelf he was pointing at.
As graceful as any cat would, she weaved over the cluttered shelf until she got to the jar he
was pointing at.

"Mh, that one, c'mon, before it gets too cold," he said.

She glared down at him with her bright amber eyes and smacked the jar off the shelf. The lid
flew open, and the sugar poured out.

Satoru laughed and made a quick gesture, stopping the jar, and the sugar in mid air. "Thank
you for the help, Utahime~" he said with a grin and willed the sugar back into the jar. Once it
was all put away, he held his hands out, and the jar slowly landed on the center of his palm.

"You could have gotten it yourself," Utahime grumbled, as crotchety as ever.

"Mh, but isn't it your job to help me?" He mused and tasted the potion again after adding a
few spoons of sugar.

It was perfectly sweet, not too overwhelming, but just enough to invoke that feeling of love
that so many associated sweetness with.

"Tch, like you need it— stop tasting your concoctions! You want to poison yourself again?"
Utahime hissed.

Satoru laughed and perfectly poured the pink tinged liquid into a glass vial. "Can you get a
cork for me?"

"It's literally within arms reach."

"Mhm, that it is," he said and held his hand out, waiting.

Utahime growled and jumped over to the drawer he had the corks in. She pawed at the string
tied to the handle to open it up, and jumped inside to retrieve a cork for him. She grabbed it
in her mouth and moved over to drop it —at his feet.

"So moody, Hime, what's got your panties in a twist? A tom try and woo you again?" He
asked as he summoned the cork to his hand. It blinked out of existence and reappeared in his
palm, obviously too big for his vial.

He shook his head and tapped the cork to the top of the vial, transfiguring it to the perfect
size and popped it in.

"Shut up, idiot!" Utahime snapped. "I'm just annoyed that you never listen to me."

Satoru smirked and held the vial up to his face to inspect it, the glowing blue of his eyes,
reflected off the glass, giving it a similar hue.

" You're the familiar, Hime, you should be listening to me," he said and shook the vial,
swirling the ingredients together further.

It looked gross. The fairy wings hadn't fully broken down, and the dust particles from the
pearl were still floating around like sand. He could see other bits floating in the vial, all
looking more like something he scooped off the ground.

"In your dreams," she growled.

"Every night~" he teased, and shook the vial again, he gave it a kiss for show, simultaneously
pushing his magic into it.

"Gross."

The liquid bloomed into a smooth, deep, shimmery pink, everything perfectly blended, the
consistency much closer to honey now than water. A perfectly beautiful love potion.

He grinned and crouched down to show Utahime the vial. "Voila~! Now , I shouldn't taste it,"
he said.

Utahime's large eyes narrowed and she batted his hand away. "It's one of those again? Get it
away from me."

He reached over to pet her, but she shirked away from him. Determined to get at least one
scratch in, he leaned forward to try again, but she hissed at him and swatted at his hand,
drawing blood in three long, surprisingly deep scratches over his knuckles.

Well… he got three scratches in…

Her eyes widened and she flinched, her ears wilting back against her head. "Ah! Why didn't
you stop me?" She asked, her voice trembling faintly.

"So stubborn," he sighed and scooped her up and held her firmly against his chest. "Do you
remember what happened last time you lashed out at me like that?" He asked as he carried
her away.

He set the potion on the counter and made his way to the washroom while Utahime struggled
in his hold.

"Put me down!" She growled.

"Oh stop, you're acting like I hurt you, but as I seem to recall, you're the one that has only
ever hurt you," he said, chuckling in amusement as she continued to struggle in his arms.

"I'm not doing that again!" She huffed angrily.

"Mh, you will."

Satoru kicked the door open and set her down on the counter beside the sink. " Revelare ," he
mumbled under his breath.

Utahime's form glimmered and shifted, the shadows cloaking her falling away until her true
beauty sat before him.
He was momentarily stunned, still not used to seeing her human visage as she barely used
this form over the past few years. Her pale skin looked almost as white as his next to the
black dress she wore, the bodice clinging to her in a perfectly beautiful fashion.

Carefully, he reached for her again and gently cupped her cheek in his hand, exhaling shakily
when he felt the warmth of her smooth skin.

"You're pathetic," she grumbled, but there wasn't really any bite to her tone.

He smirked and slid his hand up through her long, silky black hair. The deep violet tint of
each strand caught the light filtering in through the window just so.

She shivered, and he felt it in his bones, and he knew she liked it. The little liar.

"Give me your hand, Hime," he murmured and held his bleeding hand out.

She huffed and slowly held her hand out to him.

He grinned and gently grabbed her hand. He brushed his thumb over her knuckles, tracing a
line in her skin that matched the slashes in his own hand.

She hissed in pain, flinching as if she was the one with an open wound, though there wasn't
much of a difference in it anyway who was actually bleeding.

"Easy," he cooed softly and pressed a kiss against her knuckles, sending his magic through
her, and healing the hurt.

The wound on his hand closed at the same time, leaving behind a pink scar, and he smirked in
triumph.

She snatched her hand away and shoved him back. "You're so annoying, why can't you just
heal it normally?"

He held his hand out to her. "Ah-ah, I'm not done yet~ you need to do your part as well,
Hime- dear."

Utahime glowered at him, boldly pinning him with her amber eyes, her pupils slitted.

Satoru waved his hand in her face, grinning as his sunglasses fell down the bridge of his
nose. He was so close to her that he could see the way the glow of his eyes reflected into her
own.

He could hold her gaze for ages, she really was never going to win one of these little stare
downs, but he entertained her each time anyway.

The bell to his shop dinged faintly in the background, but he didn't budge, refusing to
surrender.

"You have a customer, Idiot," Utahime muttered.

"Then you better hurry up and do your part, or we'll need to cut back on supper for a few
days," he said, grinning.

She scowled, and quickly pecked the top of his hand, a tiny little kiss, so slight he barely felt
it, but he let her have it. He won anyway.

Her warm magic slowly eased over him, melting into the skin on his hand, and completely
erasing the scar, leaving his skin flawless.

Grin still in place, he turned to wash the blood off his hands. Using the residuals of Utahime's
magic still pulsing in him, he teleported out of the room, appearing sitting atop his shop
counter, catching the customer snooping through some charms he had on display.

"Those are buy one get one half off," he said.

The customer, the woman that commissioned the potion, gasped when she saw him. "Oh!
Master Gojo! I didn't see you there."

"Mh, 'cause I was invisible ~"

She gasped, her eyes wide in awe. "Oh my! I didn't know you could do that!"

He couldn't– not without Utahime helping him, but no one needed to know that. "Mhm,
mhm, I've got your potion," he said and snapped his fingers, summoning the potion to his
hand with a quiet, poof— for show.

The little glitters and smoke wafted around, and he smirked as he imagined Utahime nagging
him about finding glitter in the floorboards, and getting stuck to her dainty little paws. All she
had to do was ask nicely and he'd take care of it for her, but no, she loved to be difficult.

The woman gasped and greedily reached out to take the potion, but he held it above her
head.

"Now, now, don't you think you're forgetting something?" He asked as he waved the potion
in front of her.

"Oh! Right, of course, I'm so sorry," she said and fumbled to get a small pouch from her bag.
She held it out to him, and he pointed to the counter.

She set the pouch on the counter and he grabbed it from there. It felt like the proper weight.

He dumped the coins out on the counter, pleased to see shining gold staring back at him.
Without counting it he nodded and set the potion down on the counter.

"There you go—"

She snatched it up just like he expected her to.

"Alright, on the day you wish to give it to your beloved, store the vial in your bosom— so the
potion can absorb the love in your heart~" he said with a smirk. "I've given you enough, but
you must be cautious, a whole vial at once may lead to obsession, it is best to dose in
increments. A drop at breakfast, a bit at lunch, and a heartier amount at supper to spur his—
longing in the evening.

"It's best to serve with tea or red wine, I also suggest touching his arm or smiling at him as he
takes the first drink, understand?" Satoru explained.

The woman nodded, her knuckles whitening as she gripped the vial. "Of course! Thank you
so much, Master Gojo!"

He smiled and waved her away. "Yeah, alright, now go on, I've things to do today."

She nodded and scurried out of his shop, the bell chiming behind her.

"I hate that you make those," Utahime said as she jumped on the counter, back in her cat
form.

He shrugged. "It's crazy good money, humans are quite desperate little things," he mused and
motioned to the coins. "Could you take care of that for me?"

"I'm not touching your dirty money," Utahime spat.

He sighed heavily as if she'd done him a great disservice and twirled his finger over the coins.
They lifted into the air, following the spiral his finger made, and flew straight to the chest he
pointed to, dropping inside with the rest of the money he earned through his business.

"You're not a good familiar, Hime-dear," he grumbled.

" You're not a good witch!" She growled.

He scoffed. "I'm a sorcerer , and quite frankly, I'm the best there is, no one else can
compare."

"The point is the same, and I don't care how strong you think you are, you're not good," she
snapped, her pretty little nose in the air.

Not much could actually bother him, most of the time he shrugged off her petty little insults
and went about his day. In his mind, insulting him was akin to insulting herself.

But when she said things like that, it really got under his skin, because he knew without a
shadow of a doubt that Utahime was good.

He could feel her goodness through their bond, taste it. He could feel the comfort of her
magic, the warm energy a stark contrast to his. So when she insulted his character like that
with such vitriol, it got to him.

If she thought he was that bad, what did that mean for their arrangement? He couldn't
imagine existing without her at his side, her magic was woven so deeply with his that
sometimes, he pulled from her energy without realizing, sometimes he absorbed what she
gave without thinking to ask first.

Which, he didn't have to. There was no rule anywhere that said a witch— or sorcerer or
whatever the hell— needed to ask their familiar for permission for anything.

Familiars were bound to their masters, their magic and souls combined as one. Society
considered them one entity. A familiar without a master was incomplete, a half being.

He didn't need to ask. But ever since they met when he was young, Satoru always tried to
ask her simply because, all of those years ago, she asked him to do so.

Didn't that make him good? Wasn't that evidence enough that he was better than most? Why
did she insist so much that he was so bad? Something she did more often lately.

Was their bond not as strong as he thought? Could she leave? She shouldn't be able to
physically be too far from him, if she got too far, she'd get sick. She could die unless he
severed their connection.

But what if… what if their bond was weak? What if she wanted to leave?

The thing that drove him up the wall each time was that he knew she knew how these
arguments affected him. At least, she was supposed to know.

He could sense her emotions, sometimes if he wasn't careful, her mood would affect him. If
she was upset about something, even if it was a tragedy in a book she read, he'd get upset
himself and not know why until he realized he was absorbing her emotions.

He could tell when his teasing went too far, because he could feel her offense curdle in his
gut.

Unless he was actively blocking it, she should be able to tell the same for him, even if he was
hardly anything other than content. Wouldn't that make it when he was truly upset that much
more obvious?

Maybe she just doesn't care?

Satoru grimaced and rolled his eyes, his energy whipping up in frustration.

"I am good, I help people, Utahime, why are you so against that?" He asked, annoyed.

"No you're not!" She insisted, further chipping at his armor. "You ruin lives! How can you
make a love potion when you don't even know what love is?! It's not something to be messed
with! You know it's taboo."
Her insistence further stamped on his ego. "I know what it is! It's not as complicated as
people think, all I'm doing is helping a few bastards get laid, I didn't know you were such a
prude, Utahime, there is nothing wrong with carnal pleasure."

Her eyes widened. "Love isn't carnal pleasure!"

"Oh please, there is hardly a difference!"

"You're just proving my point, you have no idea what you're talking about!"

He scoffed and manually began closing the shop for the day, trying to burn off the energy
swirling in his chest.

He didn't bother to count his inventory, and just focused on cleaning and putting things away.

"Why are you so worked up? Love is just a censored word for lust, it's what the prudes say so
they don't embarrass themselves.

"Take the woman today for example, she loves her boss, tall, wealthy, handsome, but he is
way out of her league, she's short, untalented and plain, and she knows it. So she comes to the
best in town for a little remedy.

"He drinks the potion while he's with her, and wow would you look at that? He popped a
boner, oh but he's gonna wave it off as random, happens to the best of us, but then every time
he's with her he catches a stiff? And why is he always so horny around her?? Damn, maybe
he does love her. And they'll fuck, and maybe she'll get pregnant, and wow look, another
client happy," Satoru grumbled and tossed the broom back in the supply closet.

"Sounds more like you scammed that woman and gave her an aphrodisiac!" Utahime
snapped.

He threw his hands in the air. "Exactly! I— it's not a scam you annoying woman!"

She sniffed and jumped over to the open window. "Forget it, Gojo, clearly you have no idea
what I'm talking about."

He pointed at her. "Don't. You're not allowed to leave," he never restricted her from doing
anything, and he always left that window open for her to go as she pleased. He could force
her to stay, but even now, he couldn't bring himself to do it. But he would if she pushed
him…

"Why? You don't need me, you don't even listen to me. We're not very compatible, you know
it yourself. I'm too weak in comparison to you. Familiars are supposed to match their
masters… I don't match you. It'll be best if I find someone else won't it?" She said, her little
nose in the air.

His head spun. Was she serious? She wouldn't seek out another sorcerer, would she? She'd
downgrade herself to some lower idiot?
She couldn't. He'd have to wipe her memory if she did because if he didn't, she'd be taking all
of his arcana with her, his secrets. She'd be taking years of his magic with her. She'd be able
to share that with whatever bastard she ended up with next!

His hand twitched at his side. He could force her to stay, he could command her will to his
own…

And yet—

"Don't… don't be ridiculous…" he said, quiet, strained, a lump in his throat.

"I'm very serious," she said and jumped through the window.

He held his breath, counting the seconds, waiting for her to jump back in and call him an
idiot for believing her. He stood there, shocked, waiting for her to berate him for doubting
her.

He was light headed when he finally allowed himself a breath. He gasped for air, a bit numb,
and disoriented. There was no way she was serious! She couldn't be serious!

Is she serious?!

The bell of his shop chimed and he whirled around, tasting his heart. Of course she'd come
back to ease his nerves, of course she'd make sure he knew she was joking, trying to punish
him for stoking her ire—

"Are you Master Gojo?" A man clad in the kingdom's military uniform asked.

Satoru was dizzy. It wasn't her. She didn't come back…

But she would, right? They planned to make her favorite dish for supper…

"What can I do for you?" Satoru asked as plainly as he could."

"This is for you, The Crown has a request," he said and handed him a letter.

Satoru took it, but he didn't really pay attention to what the soldier or guard or whatever the
hell was saying. He was too busy tentatively tugging on the small thread that linked Utahime
to him.

He was relieved it was still taut, but it was simultaneously a reminder of how thin it was.
Hadn't it been thicker at one point? Hadn't there been more?
 He gently tugged on it again while the man yammered on, waiting for some kind of
response.

But even on the third tug, he got no response.

She's serious…

Chapter End Notes

I'm a sucker for all things fantasy, I couldn't help myself with this.

I'd love to know what you guys think!

Thank you for reading!

 Chapter 2
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

Satoru spent the rest of the night cleaning his shop and his upstairs apartment suite from
corner to corner.

He was too antsy to sleep or read or study. Utahime hadn't come home yet, and he couldn't
remember a time where she didn't make it back for supper. Even when she missed supper,
he'd simply wait for her, an hour, two, she was never much later.

And he'd complain about her making him starve, and she'd roll her eyes and tell him he didn't
have to wait, but he did, and he knew deep down it was the right thing because she would
always smile when she learned he waited.

So he left the food he made on the counter, cold and untouched. He didn't have an appetite
anyway.

Typically, if Utahime disapproved of something he did, she'd explain her reasoning in a

surprisingly calm manner. He'd question her, offer his own reasons and often they'd come to a
peaceful understanding. Most of the time, he bent to whatever she insisted, but when he did
put his foot down, she didn't have too much to say beside an angry little huff.

It was always the stupid love potion that got her so heated— the best money maker he had!

He didn't get it. But even if she stormed out in the past, she always came back for supper,
and sometimes she'd give him the silent treatment, but she'd be home, safe, with him where
she belonged.

"Fine, you win, I won't make them anymore," he grumbled as he yanked his bedding off so
he could take it to wash. Utahime always told him to keep himself busy if he was frustrated
so he didn't do anything drastic, but, he was running out of shit to do to keep his mind
occupied, and he was a hair's width away from cleaning Utahime's room as well.

If she isn't back by morning I'm going to literally flip this whole city inside out, along with
anyone else that gets in my way.

As he thought that he forcibly yanked the sleeves of one of his jackets inside out and a grin
worked its way onto his face as he imagined a person in its place. The question though,
would it be their entire body? Just the skin?

That's what he'd do to if an idiot was trying to take her from him…

If someone was trying to take her from him, he'd make sure they lived just long enough to
regret even thinking about crossing him, let alone acting on it.
But Utahime wouldn't be very happy about that…

He grimaced and shoved the heels of his palms into his eyes.

She'd get over it though. She'd have to. Did she expect him to take these insults lying down?

And what if she's just tired of you? She said herself that she wants to serve someone else…

Well fuck, she did, didn't she? Did she?

Did she not care about insulting him? After everything he's done for her, she'd slight him so
easily? Even suggesting that was a grave offense! Familiars were punished for way less... he
let her run wild, and Iook what happened.

If she isn't back by morning I'm going to literally flip this whole city inside out, along with
anyone else that gets in my way. He thought once again.

Everyone is getting it at morning's first light…

He hung everything he washed up to dry and went to organize his storage room. It was a
cluttered mess, and Utahime had been nagging him to clean it up for ages now…

He organized everything by type, then color and weight. He made sure everything looked
perfect, every portion of material was exactly the same as everything of its kind, every vial
was filled exactly at the same line.

If the color was off by even a tint, he tossed it, if something had a dent he mended it until the
whole room looked picture perfect.

It looked clinically perfect, everything sorted and set to perfection down to the atom.

A type of unnatural perfection that only he could achieve thanks to the power that stemmed
from his eyes.

His eyes could perceive things that others could not. An innate gift he had since birth. The
six eyes, known only in legends. A trait that got him sold to The Crown when he was only
three years old where he was raised as a weapon.

Over the years, the power within him grew, and he learned how to warp matter. He learned
how to see energy in ways that not even the best court sorcerers could. He could bend space,
see sound, touch light, he could make infinity touchable, visible, moldable…
And when he was seventeen, Utahime convinced him to literally fight for his freedom.

If anyone can do it... I truly believe it is you...

The only time she ever eagerly fed his ego.

You can do it, Satoru! I'm with you to the end!

So with her spurring him on, he had burst into the throne room and challenged the King and
his council to a duel for his soul. A year later after defeating every single sorcerer in the
King's army, just a handful shy of a thousand strong, Satoru earned the honor and recognition
of The Strongest Sorcerer of The Age.

And on his eighteenth birthday, he left the castle, and purchased the plot of land his shop
stood on as a free man.

His most difficult spells couldn't be done without a lot of preparation. He had to spend time
he didn't have gathering his magic, often implementing complicated magic circles. With
Utahime's help, he could shorten that prep time to seconds, with her help, he didn't need to
write out sigils. She worked as a catalyst– something he often joked about, what with her
having a cat form. She was able to direct and channel his power for him in ways that he still
hadn't figured out how to do on his own.

Satoru stumbled out of the room when he was finally finished and glanced around the shop.
He could fix a few more things. The shop was a little run down.

Muttering to himself about the cracks in the floorboards and the chips in the paint he
conjured a piece of chalk in his hand and crouched in the center of his shop. There was just
too much to do by hand, he could just fix it all at once.

He drew a large circle and added a few sigils and symbols when a thought came to him.
Instead of just patching everything up, why not actually fixing it? He could do it. It would be
easy.

He could break down the whole building bit by bit until it was nothing but dust, and
reconstruct it into the epitome of perfection.

He'd built this shop by hand six years ago, carried the wood and stone from the harbor with
only Utahime's help. Why hadn't he just done this? Why did he waste his time?

Hmm, he could break the city down while he was at it… if he added a few more sigils, made
the circle a bit bigger, he could tear every single building down at once. Then he'd build it up
again in a perfectly beautiful city.

He increased the size of the circle and added the new sigils needed for such a massive spell.

The old harbor wouldn't need that poor patch job anymore, he could straighten and shine the
cobblestone, polish it, and turn the city fountain from common stone into marble and gold.

Maybe he'd even fix the trees, the flowers… the neighbor did always complain that her
flowers died too soon, he could change that, make them durable.

He'd put Utahime's favorite flowers there instead, and some around the shop.

And while he had everything compressed into a tiny marble of matter in his hands he could
find Utahime before he shifted everything back into place to properly welcome her home…

He stood in the center of the circle and held his hands up, forming the hand signs needed to
start the spell.

The whole building groaned as his magic quickly flared around him in a whirl of pulsing
white-blue light. He grinned, the energy that pulsed around him making him feel giddy.

He never got to use the full breadth of his power, he'd been forbidden from doing so when he
belonged to The Crown, and the quiet life he'd built with Utahime didn't require such drastic
spells.

But The Crown was no longer his master, and Utahime wasn't around to stop him...

Besides… It felt good, the power. Exciting. Keeping it bottled up all the time was a different
kind of exhausting.

Too dangerous, deadly…

They had no idea.

The energy slowly gathering around him grew heavy it tasted metallic, and simultaneously
made his hair began to stand on end and slowly whirl around him.

The chalk he used to draw the magic circle began to float as well, along with any similarly
sized object that wasn't tied down.

The metallic taste in his mouth intensified and morphed into iron. Blood flooded his mouth
and slowly trickled down the corner of his lips. Too much at once… his body was still too
weak to handle all of his power without a proper medium…

Oh well, one couldn't improve without a bit of sacrifice.

The building groaned again, and one of the support beams cracked. He could feel the ground
trembling, the vibrations matching the tremor in the air, the ones that shook his bones. Any
second now it was going to burst, the bubble of magic gathering around him.

It would be beautiful, sublime, an explosion of power unlike anything these seaside folks
have ever seen in their measly little lives.

The shop door flew open, the bell ringing loudly, and he blinked in confusion as he locked
eyes on glowing amber.

"Mitte mihi!" Utahime yelled, her hair whipping around her from the whirl of energy.

Compelled, he changed his hand signs to match hers and channeled all of the built up magic
to her as she commanded.

She screamed as soon as it hit her, and he just stared, eyes wide as she channeled his magic,
one arm reaching out towards him, matching his hand sign, and the other arm was directed
out the door to the sky.

The sky suddenly split with a crack of lightning that set the heavens on fire, the tendrils of
the bolt branched out across the clouds like the tree of life, flashing everything in a pale
purple light.

The following thunder crack was so loud that he momentarily lost his hearing. It felt and
sounded like a bomb, it rattled his bones.
His eyes crossed, and he laughed.

The only sound he could process now was a high pitched ringing.

Seconds later it started to pour.

Utahime stared at him for a few heavy beats, out of breath, her body trembling and then she
leaned forward and puked a river of blood. He suddenly couldn't breathe.

Whatever was holding him in place finally released him just in time for him to rush forward
and catch her.

All the sound rushed back to him so quickly he felt dizzy. The sounds of people yelling,
screaming, dogs barking, horses getting spooked, the thrum of the rain, the howling of the
wind.

Confused, coughing, and panicking, he carried her up to her room and laid her down before
rushing to his to get the healing tonic he got from his friend, Shoko, the kingdom's best
healer.

He has never seen her bleed like that before... she was never affected this much...

He shakily poured some of the potion into Utahime's mouth and placed his hand on her
forehead to send an additional healing pulse through her.

He sighed in relief when he felt that she was stable, and leaned back on his heels to observe
her.

"You snapped again," Utahime mumbled, her voice rough.

Ah.

"What were you thinking about?" She asked, her voice a whisper.

"I… I don't really know," he mumbled, feeling light headed. He looked her over again to
make sure she was okay and finally let himself relax. He felt exhausted all of a sudden. His
head hurt like hell, and his eyes felt like they'd been poked out.

She remained silent, but kept her eyes on him. She was probably analyzing him, trying to
figure out what the fuck happened. He wanted to know too.
He still had too much energy pulsing through him that he didn't know what to do with. Since
he was in her room now, he started to clean it up. It didn't need much, Utahime was always
neat and tidy, but he could see dust on top of all her bookshelves, so he started there.

"You missed dinner," he grumbled in frustration.

"I know, I was—"

He spun around to glare at her. "Why?"

She frowned and sat up. "I'm sorry, Gojo… I didn't realize it got so late…"

That only sparked his irritation. He snapped. "How the fuck?! You never do this! I couldn't
even sense you! I was this close to going out to look for you!" He yelled, and held his fingers
out a hair's width apart. "I don't know why I didn't! I should have, I should have dragged you
back! I was going to— I would have burnt this city down— I was going to, I was going to
tear it down, I was going to rip everything to shreds—"

"Gojo—!"

He leaned forward and pressed his finger against her lips. "Shh, don't worry, Utahime, I was
going to fix everything. I was going to make it better– perfect, for you. You would have liked
it, I know you like everything organized, tidy, you would have liked my vision, I can still do
it if you want, I can still—"

"Satoru! "

He froze, his voice caught in his throat. No one used his first name, she almost never used his
first name. He could still count on one hand how many times she has said it. It sounded
weird, foreign, but each time she said it he found that he really liked it.

"Take a deep breath, and slowly let it out until I tell you to stop," Utahime mumbled and
moved his hand then pressed two fingers on his forehead, drawing a sigil he recognized that
was typically used to drain a witch of their power, depleo.

He blinked at her, curious, lost, but did as she said without questioning. He could feel her
draining his magic, but he let her do as she pleased. He had no reason not to trust her.

She was his familiar, his other half, they were considered one entity, so his magic was hers
just as much as hers was his. At least that's what he's always believed.

They'd found each other organically, something that rarely happened in this day and age. The
act of acquiring a familiar was very transactional nowadays. Familiars were traded, collected,
and sold quite often, something not even he had been protected from. Which was why he was
proud their bond was not tainted the same way.

What she was doing was very illegal though. Familiars weren't allowed to take from their
masters, and Utahime typically lived by the book. Why was she breaking the rules now?
He would have asked, but even his mind was growing fuzzy as more and more of his energy
was pulled away from him. Forming thoughts was difficult.

She drained him until he felt sleepy, and he laid back against her bed, his eyes half closed as
he fought to stay awake.

"Feel better?" She asked, sighing.

"Mhm…" he hummed sleepily.

"One more deep breath."

He took another deep breath and felt as if he melted further into her mattress. He could stay
here forever, even with his feet on the ground, he was so comfortable he couldn't find the
energy to move.

She finally cut the flow a few beats later and moved her fingers off his forehead.

She got off the bed and grabbed his arm and pushed, pulled. It took until she grabbed his leg
and pushed that he realized she was trying to straighten him to lay properly on her bed.

He just watched her through the narrow window of his eyes, too exhausted to help. He felt
detached from his body, his mind still fuzzy, distant.

He could still hear the rain, still pouring like crazy.

When she finally straightened him out she sat on the edge with a sigh. "You're heavy…"

She reached over and brushed his hair out of his face, and slowly ran her fingers through his
hair. "You know the King is going to send word for you now… there is no way his sorcerers
didn't sense that, they'll know it was you… what were you thinking?"

He closed his eyes fully for a few beats, thoroughly enjoying the way she was playing with
his hair. She rarely did this. He liked it though, he wished she did it more often. He petted her
all the time–tried to, when she didn't scratch him, it only seemed fair for her to return the
favor more often.

Hm, now that he thought about it she tried to scratch him a lot lately. What was up with that?

She sighed. "I'm sorry… about yesterday. I shouldn't have said those things. I was just…
irritated. You irritate me, Gojo."

Ah… back to formalities…

"And I'm sorry for being gone for so long… I lost track of time… I also… may have gotten
wasted… I didn't want you to see me like that. So I cast a spell to cloak our connection," she
explained with her head down. "Plus… I didn't want the alcohol to affect you…" She looked
back up with a frown. "I forgot you don't need alcohol to influence you into doing stupid
things," she gently tapped his forehead. "That's all you."
He smirked, amused. She was right. He was constantly walking on a thin line between sanity
and insanity. The last time he snapped, he leveled a whole forest while in search of a demon
that was hiding out in it.

It had been evading him for days, picking off townsfolk every night until he decided, why not
just flatten down every hiding spot?

He'd squashed the demon in the process, but also destroyed 20 acres of forest land. Utahime
had been in the town talking to the residents at the time, trying to get information on the
demon to try and track it easier.

It had taken him a long time to understand why she started screaming at him when he ran
over to tell her he'd killed it…

She'd cried for all the unfortunate animals caught in the middle. She'd mourned their loss as if
they were more. There had been people caught in it too, and she made him light candles and
pray for their souls… a tragedy he promised her he wouldn't do again…

And he'd stood beside her in the rain as she prayed for the lives that he'd taken without
thought…

Within the last few years, his power had kept growing to a point where it was getting to be
too much for his body to handle, and he did things without realizing more often, without
thinking. He could melt his own brain if he wasn't careful. The knowledge that doing so
would also kill Utahime was what helped him keep himself in check.

He didn't want to hurt her.

But no matter how careful he was, he wasn't perfect. He could slip at any moment, but
Utahime was good at keeping him on the right side of the line— if she was around. She
somehow knew how to tell when he started drifting, as she called it, and would pull him back
from wherever it was he'd drifted.

What would happen if she couldn't one day? The sight of her throwing up all that blood
violently resurfaced and he grimaced.

He was dangerous. Maybe she was right. She shouldn't be his familiar anymore, he could
kill her, on accident of course… but what if one day he did it on purpose?

If he hurt her, even if it was an accident, then he'd probably kill everyone in this damn city,
and himself along with it. Maybe he could take everyone in the entire kingdom down with
him… possibly more. He had enough power to do it, he knew he did.

Maybe she was right. They weren't compatible, at least not anymore.
He was too dangerous, a liability.

He'd have to find someone else that matched her better. If he found someone else for her, then
he could make peace with severing their connection.

As much as he didn't want her to be associated with the kingdom, and by extension a
Sorcerer, a common witch wouldn't be able to provide her the protection he wanted her to
have.

Witches that worked for and were trained by the crown were dubbed sorcerers, like humans
were dubbed knights, even when they retired, they retained that honor. Maybe he could find
someone that was retired? Though he still didn't like the idea of giving her away to some
stranger…

It would have to be his old classmate then, Shoko. Even though she worked in the heart of the
castle, she was also the most protected sorceress in the kingdom. And she didn't have a
familiar…

If he gave Utahime to Shoko… then he could afford to risk keeping her memories intact.
Because Shoko wasn't strong enough to replicate his best spells, and he knew she wouldn't
share them with anyone. Shoko was also a little lazy, and she wouldn't really care to try and
understand them.

Utahime wouldn't share them either. He knew she wouldn't, and no one would dare harm
Utahime if she was Shoko's familiar, the King's best healer.

It was the best option. And him? He'd carry on with his life, his business, and everyone
would be happy.

Utahime would be safe, she'd be matched with a master that matched her. Shoko could have a
friend, they had gotten along well when he still belonged to The Crown. They'd even joked
about how they matched better than Utahime matched with him.

They were right.

And he'd carry on with his business…

Utahime will be happy, safe.

Shoko will have a friend.

And he'd carry on with his business…

Satoru woke up with a painful twist in his gut, he was starving, and disoriented.

He looked around and got his face full of fur when he turned his face to the side.

Hime…

He turned into her a bit more and instinctively pulled her close to his chest. Damn he was
going to miss her… but even after sleeping on it, he couldn't see the downside of the idea.

It was still raining, though not as violently as before.

Satoru stood up and gently set Utahime down on her pillow so she could continue sleeping.
He pet her gently between the ears, smiling when he heard her begin to pur.

She was so tiny. Sometimes he forgot easily just because he didn't really think about it. But
she was petite for her age, even normal cats were much larger than her. He always teased her
by saying that was why she had a huge temper, because she was so small.

My little ball of fury…

He chuckled and slipped out of the room so he could make breakfast. He left the food he
made the night prior on the counter, not really feeling like dealing with it right now.

He felt like making pancakes…

He was in the middle of mixing the batter when he sensed Utahime enter the kitchen, her
little paw pads making silent little taps on the polished hardwood.

He set the bowl down to greet her, but then she jumped on his shoulder and transfigured into
a scarf, wrapping snug around his neck, warm and soft.

She hadn't done this in a long time.

This was how she liked to rest with him when he was a kid. If he annoyed her, she'd strangle
him, but she never actually hurt him, and he secretly liked that she stayed so close.
In his head it always felt like she was hugging him.

Even when he was a teenager, she'd lounge around his neck as the snuggest scarf. He never
figured out why, but he was always so mellow when she sat around his neck like this.

He could actually sit still through two hour meetings. Whether or not he actually retained any
information was up in the air, but he always made it through without a peep. Utahime always
caught him up anyway.

Most familiars had three natural forms, a human form, a beast form, and an inanimate object
of some kind that only awakened when they were bonded to a witch.

It was common for witches to dictate that form for their familiars, forcing them to take on the
form they wanted. A knife, a broom, a tome, a key, those were the most common. Sorcerers
often wore their familiars in their object form, which were typically pins that sat on their
jackets, as it wasn't uncommon for them to have more than one– a show of power and status.

They could take on other forms, but those required spells.

Satoru didn't know any of that until he had already had Utahime clinging to his neck for three
years.

And at eight years old, he threw quite the fit when his tutors demanded he force her to
change.

"G'mornin', Utahime…" he murmured, and nuzzled his face into the soft scarf. She hated it
when he did that, but this time, she didn't complain…

"Good morning, Gojo… How are you feeling?" She asked, her voice echoing in his head.

"Starving," he said and poured a perfect round of batter on the pan.

"What's wrong?"

"Hm? Why do you ask?"

"You said my name…"

"Don't I always?"

"You know what I mean…"

"Do you want any?" He asked as he flipped the pancake on a nearby plate.

"Just two please."

He nodded and busied himself with making the rest.

He made himself four and Utahime the two she asked for and he took both plates to his little
kitchen table.

He felt Utahime shift into her cat form, but she stayed draped around his neck, so he used his
left hand to feed her bits of her food– without syrup because she wasn't a fan of sweets– and
ate his own food with his right.

It would take him a week to travel to the capital, and he wasn't sure if he wanted to find
someone to watch his shop while he was gone.

He could just trap the inside, and trap anyone in place that broke in so he could deal with
them when he got back.

But if someone broke in the night he left, it would be at least two weeks before he got back,
which meant they'd most likely be dying or dead.

He might get a fine if the neighbors complained about the smell of rotting corpse coming
from his shop. Plus the smell would be a bitch to get out.

There was also a risk of legal trouble…

He sighed and poked at his food. Maybe he'd get the baker's kid to watch his shop, or he
could just seal it. That was the logical option. But it would also mean he'd lose two weeks of
income—

"Gojo? Hello? Are you okay?" Utahime asked, her smooth voice cutting through his thoughts
like a warm knife through butter.

"Mhm, I'm just thinking," he said.

"You've been thinking for fifteen minutes… you're never quiet for that long without
something being wrong," Utahime said, her voice tinged with concern.

He reached up and petted her between the ears.

What would it feel like to sever their connection? He has always heard that severing a bond
with a familiar always weakened the witch in question.

That might be a good thing for me...

It was why doing so was often used as a punishment. If a witch broke a law and they had a
familiar, a forbidden spell would be used to forcibly break the connection. The familiar
would then become property of the crown, and the criminal thrown in jail or cast away.
But there were civil ways to pass on familiars, calling back to the transactional nature of the
whole idea.

He'd have to research the best way. He didn't want to risk hurting her.

He knew family often inherited familiars from their aging kin. The ritual had to be done
while the witch was still alive, or else the familiar would die alongside their master.

That method felt like one that would work best for Utahime. And their link didn't feel as solid
as it once was either… so it should be simple enough.

Satoru got up to take care of the dishes then moved over to his study.

It functioned like a mini library, and held all the books and tomes he owned.

He skimmed the shelves until he found the one he was looking for and cracked it open in the
middle.

Utahime started to smack his face with her tail, but he paid her no mind, even when she got
him in the eye. The irritation only lasted a few moments.

He found the section he was looking for and quickly looked it over. According to this entry,
he'd need to burn the items that symbolized their bond. The first things they gave one
another.

Nowadays it was typically a contract, but…

He slowly took his sunglasses off his face and stared at them.

Utahime suddenly smacked his hand, and he dropped them. He let them fall.

He heard a crack, and Utahime gasped, and she jumped off his shoulder.

"I'm sorry!… I was just trying to get your attention," she hurriedly said. "You're being weird,
I'm worried— I-I'll fix them for you—"

"No need," he mumbled and leaned down to pick them up. The lenses were indeed cracked.

These represent our bond? Strangely symbolic I suppose…

She gave him these years ago, as a thank you for the bow he got her, and because she noticed
he squinted all the time from the light. He never went a full day without them. It was strange
though, because he'd dropped them before, he's been punched in the face while wearing
them, and they have never cracked. They didn't even have any scratches on them...

Maybe they're bond really was weak…

He absently petted her neck, stuck his finger under the white bow that decorated her form in
one way or another ever since.

Around her neck as a cat, decorating her hair as a woman.

The ribbon felt thinner than it used to be…

Satoru reached over and grabbed the end of her bow. The first thing he gave her. She wore it
every day since, and he couldn't think of a time where she didn't have it on aside from fresh
out of bed.

The ribbon was bright white, it never got dirty, but now it looked dull, thin, frayed…

Strange, because aside from the fresh cracks, his sunglasses had been in perfect condition...

Grimacing, he pulled the ribbon loose, but before he could completely remove it from her
neck, she transformed, and her hands flew up to stop him, her slender fingers gripped tightly
around his wrist.

"What are you doing??" She asked, sounding panicked.

But when Satoru looked at her, he wasn't really seeing her.

He was looking at her magic. He was just noticing how faint his own magic was in the flow
of hers. The core of her magic was once a pretty lavender. A mix of her warm fiery energy,
and his bright whitish blue.

He only saw the warm hues now.

"When did that happen?" He whispered to himself. His energy still looked like it always had.
The core of his essence was still tinted that familiar soft lavender.

How long had she been hiding from him? She was blocking him out, but still letting him take
from her so he wouldn't notice…

And he hadn't.

She really has drifted away…

He let go of her ribbon and stepped away. "I should open the shop," he mumbled and sent the
book to his room, it blinked out of existence and he quickly left the study.
Utahime rushed after him. "Gojo! Talk to me! What is going on? I know you're up to
something! Tell me what it is!" She demanded.

Satoru unlocked the shop and turned around intending to sit on the counter to wait for
potential customers, but was stopped by Utahime.

She got in his face, her brows furrowed and her cute little nose scrunched in displeasure.
"Talk to me!" She demanded again, her voice a little shaky, her energy a bit frantic.

"Are you happy?" He asked suddenly, searching her face and her energy simultaneously, his
eyes not quite focused.

As powerful as he was, he still hadn't been able to see Utahime drifting away from him. He
was a bit insulted by it, though he wasn't sure if it was over his own failure, or the fact that
she never said anything.

Why hadn't she told him?

Didn't she know it was dangerous to both of them to have a fragile bond? If their
compatibility soured, one of his spells could blow up on him, and with how strong he was, it
could be literal, it could kill him.

He might have actually poisoned himself with a potion, the concoction going awry without
him realizing, his magic not quite right.

In fact, he had poisoned himself a few times recently. He thought it was his own failures that
caused it, an ingredient he missed, or a step in the brewing he messed up. A slip from
complacency.

But… had it been something else?

She could have died from an even longer list of risks…

"W-What? Why are you asking me that?" Utahime asked, her brows furrowing deeper.

"Are you happy?" He asked again.

"Of course… of course I am," she said.

Her lip trembled, her eyes shook, the warmth of her magic warbled, and he knew the truth.

He knew that she lied.

 Utahime just lied to him. Right to his face, and it felt like a stab in the gut. How often had she
lied to him? When did she start doing that?

He'd never lied to her. He was as honest to her as humans were to the gods. He had no
secrets, not from her. She knew everything about him, and here she was lying to his face! For
how long?

"Do you like your life? Do you like how it is right now, with me?" He asked quietly.

Her eyes shook once more, a subtle detail missed by everyone, everyone but him. "Of course
I do, why are you asking me these stupid questions?"

Another lie… a deflection...

He forced a smile and squeezed her cheek. "Good! I'm just checking since you're so needy,"
he said around a dry laugh.

"W-Wha?!"

The shop's bell chimed right then, and a small group of people filed in, shouting about the
storm.

He sidestepped her and pushed his sunglasses back on, and even though he tried, even he
could not see around the cracks in the glass.

Chapter End Notes

I had three different drafts of this because Gojo kept losing it on me, and it wasn't
originally in the outline. Well we compromised to the least dramatic one surprisingly,
sometimes the characters be doing their own thing...

Thank you for reading!

Mitte mihi: send it to me

Depleo: deplete.
 Chapter 3
Chapter Notes

👀. More angst is underway, but angst

Noticed a few theories that are on the right track
isn't complete without a good pay off!

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Over the next few days, things continued to feel awkward between them. Utahime was
quieter than she typically was, but Satoru figured that was because he didn't tease her nearly
as much as he used to.

He couldn't.

The knowledge that things were going awry between them was a constant cloud on his
psyche. He was too aware of everything he did, and he unintentionally zoned out for large
portions of the day.

Most of the time it happened after he noticed a glaring difference in Utahime's behavior. Each
time he noticed one, he'd get lost trying to remember when she changed.

From what he figured out so far, he found a vague time frame of when it started, but the why
was still evading him.

One thing that he noticed was different was how they tackled chores.

Nowadays, all he really needed to do was snap his fingers and everything pretty much
organized and cleaned itself in an instant. He still did a few things by hand, one going over
sales and commissions, and what needed restocking, but everything else was done with
magic.

They used to do everything by hand, and he remembered getting into an argument with her
about it two years into the business.

He was twenty and tired of wasting each day running and closing up the shop. He wanted to
go out and explore the city. They'd lived here for two years, and he barely got to explore.
Even though he encouraged Utahime to go out all the time, he was still feeling left out of the
adventure.

Plus he was tired of turning down all the invites he'd get from the ladies that would visit the
shop under the pretense that he didn't have the time.

Developing the spell to take care of all the grunt work was easy. It was a modification of one
he used to help the scullery maids with the dishes at the castle.
But Utahime hated it.

She didn't want him to make their lives easier, and fought with him over it until he promised
not to use the spell for her side of the chores.

Laziness is one of the worst things one can indulge in. Complacency will kill you one day.

So he shrugged and agreed to let her keep fussing over things by hand while he zapped away
his share of things.

It worked. At least he thought it did.

But now as he sat watching Utahime wash the dishes by hand, he wondered if she'd been
right— again.

He didn't get it though. This was such a pointless task and she still insisted on doing it
manually. How could using a spell to get it done harm anyone?

Satoru sighed and stood up from his spot at the table and slid in next to Utahime at the sink
where he used to stand around five years ago. Sometimes they'd switch and he'd wash, and
she'd do the drying, but he'd always been at her side in some way. They had always done
things together.

"Gimme that," he mumbled and swiped the dish out of her hand so he could dry it with the
towel that she used just for this purpose.

Her head whipped around to him, a glare already furrowing her thin brows. "What are you
doing, Gojo?" She growled, already annoyed, already keyed up for who knows what reason.

He just stared at her. He hadn't even done anything yet, and she was ready to chew him out
already. Did she always react so aggressively all the time?

"I can do this," she snapped and attempted to shoulder him away when he tried to grab the
next dish in her hands.

"Don't want my help?" He asked, feigning offense with a dramatic gasp.

"No! Go away and do something useful," she grumbled.

"I am, isn't helping you useful?" He asked and slipped the next dish from her hands.
She scowled and tried to snatch it back, but he held it above her head.

"No it's not!" She growled. "You're being difficult!"

" I'm being difficult? Hime, you're the one clogging the machine here."

She scoffed. "Excuse me? I was doing just fine before you decided to insert your annoying
face into the mix!"

He sighed and put the plate in his hands away. "Let me help you."

"You can help by going away."

He frowned and crossed his arms. "Why are you being so difficult? You really don't want my
help?"

"No! And I'm not difficult, I would have been done by now if you hadn't come over to bother
me," she said through her teeth.

He huffed and dropped the towel on her head. "Fine, have fun," he said and walked away, a
bit slighted.

She shouted verbal slander at his back, and so he turned the water in the sink into solid ice so
she could have an actual reason to call him an asshole.

Utahime went out a lot, but Satoru was only now realizing how much she actually left. If she
said anything at all, she typically said, see you later before she disappeared for the day, but
that was no longer enough for him.

"When are you coming back?" He asked around a mouth full of ice cream.

Utahime was in her human form. Something he noticed she did more often when she went
out lately. Usually she stayed in her cat form for most of the day, sometimes days. Even
though he often teased her over her outings, he knew she actually typically went out to
sunbathe on the roof for most of the day, or sneak treats from oblivious humans, or to simply
go on walks, spend time at the park. She was a free spirit, and thrived on fresh air.

Sometimes she'd share her sight with him at random times on her escapades to show him a
human performance or a pretty flower that she found.

Though, that was another thing she hadn't done in a long time…
She'd change to her human form at home to do chores or sometimes when she joined him for
supper, but she very rarely went out in that form. She even had her hair done in a fancy braid
today. Is she actually meeting someone seriously?

Utahime shrugged. "Later today. Don't blow anything up while I'm gone. "

He grimaced and shoved the ice cream aside, suddenly not in the mood for it. The last time
he snapped she never brought it up again unless he broached the topic himself. She knew he
wasn't proud of what he did, that he hated being weak, that he hated not being in control.

And this wasn't the first time she's made a snide remark about his latest… episode.

"Don't come back smelling like cheap booze," he shot back, irritated.

She whirled on him. "Excuse me?"

He shrugged. "At least go for higher quality. You know you can buy whatever you want if
you put it on my tab— oh, unless the loser that's sniffing your ass can't afford it?"

She scowled and jabbed her finger in his face, but he didn't even flinch. "Watch it, Gojo! I
don't comment on what you do in your free time, I expect that same respect."

He pushed her finger away. "Hime-dear, I'm just telling the truth, cheap doesn't look or smell
good on you."

She flipped him off and stormed out.

He scoffed.

"I want you back right at sunset!" He shouted after her, and just because he could, and maybe
to be an asshole, he scorched that command into their bond.

She would be compelled to obey, no matter what she was doing, no matter where she went.
She would return at sunset, just as he commanded.

Smirking to himself he carried on minding the shop, in a surprisingly good mood for once.
He expected a blow up tonight, but he let himself enjoy the day.

Even though it was still raining, it was a relatively nice day. He turned up the charm on all the
customers, sold twice as much as he would on a normal day, and when the sun began its
descent towards that horizon line, he sat on the counter with a smirk and a mug of hot
chocolate in his hand to wait for his precious ball of fury to burst through the door.

And she did not disappoint.

"What the fuck, Gojo!?" Utahime shouted when she burst through the front door, the bell
ringing loudly behind her. She was red in the face and breathless, as if she'd been running, her
dress a tad out of place.

Satoru looked over her quickly, taking note of her disheveled appearance with narrowed
eyes.

"Oh! You're right on time, Hime-dear, I was starting to miss you~" he teased, grinning. "Got
me waiting on you all by my lonesome."

"Why did you do that?!" She demanded, her voice damn near a screech. True music to his
ears.

"What are you talking about?" He asked behind a cheeky grin.

"You know exactly what you did!"

"Nooo~ I don't, Hime, why are you so upset?" He asked as innocently as he could with a
smirk plastered on his face, and whip cream on his lip.

She threw her purse to the side and marched up to him. "I was in the middle of—"

"A date? Oof, so sorry," he said and hooked his leg around her to yank her closer to him.
"You shoulda just said so!"

She yelped and jumped away from him, "What the hell? Don't do that!"

"Aw, you don't wanna be close to me?" He pouted and kicked his feet out like a child. "So
mean~"

"What is wrong with you?"

"You should bring him here! You never introduce me to your little playmates~" he said and
winked.

Her eyes widened and she shook her head. "Absolutely not! That's the worst idea you've ever
come up with!"

He wiped his mouth and got off the counter and leaned down in her face. She stepped back
and he grabbed her face in his hand and forced her to look at him.

"Why don't I tag along next time?" He asked and slowly brushed his thumb over the corner of
her lips, clearing away the smudge in her lipstick.

She glowered at him. "I changed my mind, that is the worst idea you've come up with."

He didn't think so, he thought it was a great idea but since he could smell alcohol on her
breath, he let it slide.
There was something else clinging to her that he wasn't a fan of, some kind of cologne that
burnt his throat…

He held his hands up in surrender. "Fine, be like that," he sighed dramatically and clapped his
hands together. "Well! Since you're here, you can help me close up the shop!" He said and
turned to grab a broom from the supply closet.

He heard her complain under her breath, but she started closing up the shop like he
suggested.

He was in the middle of putting things away when he noticed something out of place on
Utahime's shoulder.

Careful not to draw her attention, he plucked a stray strand of hair off her dress. He held it up
to the light and pursed his lips. It was short and brown, clearly not matching her dark violet,
raven locks.

And from what he could tell, there were faint magic residuals clinging to it.

Figuring out who this belonged to would be so easy. In fact, he could already sense
something familiar about it…

She's upgraded from humans, he mused to himself as he analyzed the hair. The question that
really mattered though, was this individual a witch?

If it was, then there would be a problem. It was highly disrespectful to even touch another
witch's familiar without explicit permission. But this…?

Oh she wouldn't…

He could barely sit still.

As soon as the shop was closed up Utahime stormed upstairs, but he let her go.

He had something to do anyway…

He gave it a few minutes until he sensed her energy quiet down before he left the shop and
held the strand of hair up.
He encased it in his magic, absorbing the residuals left behind and a burst of information
flooded his mind.

It did indeed belong to a witch. A man that was older than him, but significantly weaker—
though everyone was.

The part that really got to him was why the energy was so familiar.

"No fucking way…"

She wouldn't. But… maybe she couldn't tell? But there was no way she couldn't… but even
if she really couldn't tell who it was, she wouldn't do that! Not with a witch! She was much
too proud. She hated how often witches took advantage of her kind for sins of the flesh.
Unless… That's all she wanted? Still—

That wasn't even considering how immensely disrespectful it was towards him!

Why would she do this? She can have anyone she wants!

…!

The next thing he fully processed was that he was standing in the rain outside of the tavern
Utahime liked to frequent.

The owner of the residuals he was tracking was inside, and he knew without a doubt that it
was a sorcerer .

Why, Hime?...

He blinked…

"Kusakabe! Long time no see!" Satoru said, his grin sharp.

The man sitting on the barstool beside him jumped and looked over at him. "Uh, do I know
you?"

Satoru yanked his sunglasses off and shoved them in his coat pocket. "You sure do~!" He
said through his teeth.

His eyes widened. "G-Gojo?! What– I didn't see you come in—"

"I would ask you why the hell you're here, but I know more than enough," Satoru said and
threw his arm around his shoulder and yanked him close, looking him directly in the eyes,
despite the man's attempt at pushing him off. "If-I-so-much-as-catch a whiff of your gross-
smoke-tainted-cologne on my Utahime again, I'll unzip your flesh with my bare hands— dick
first, " he threatened, grin still in place. " Then I'll add a bit of salt and watch you writhe like
the worm you are!"

"Whoa, what the fuck?! What are you even talking about?" Kusakabe demanded and
attempted to shove him off again, but Satoru didn't let him.

"The woman that you've been fucking around with, she's my familiar, you damned bastard,"
he snarled.

"What?? I didn't know—"

Satoru dug his fingers into him and grabbed his collarbone. "Bullshit!"

"Ow—! I didn't— besides, she approached me!" He ground out.

Distantly Satoru heard glass shatter and people start yelling, but he was more focused on
trying not to crush this bastard beside him.

"She was drinking, you loser!"

"It was only a few!"

The pressure in the room got heavy, even the dust in the air froze and shook.

"Look— I-I didn't know who she was— N-Nothing really happened anyway! She's actually
really shy—"

"You're a fucking liar, Atsuya, I'm going to kick your ass– again , and this time, you won't
even be able to crawl away!"

"I-I swear! Fuck— she— we just get a bit handsy, n-nothing else!" He said quickly—
truthfully.

Satoru blinked and refocused on him, a cheshire grin slowly forming on his face. The poor
idiot was white as a ghost!

"My previous point still stands— in fact, if you so much as cross her field of view– I'll know,
and I'll find you, got it?" He whispered darkly.
"G-Got it."

"Great~!" Satoru stood up and dusted himself off, literally throwing the particles that clung to
Kusakabe back to him, residuals and all. "Oh! And if you tell her about this, I'll rip your
throat out~!" He said, grinning.

"You're psycho!"

He laughed, giggled in amusement and turned around to leave, but froze when he noticed all
the glass in the building was shattered.

He sighed dramatically and turned back around, his dark coat whipping up from the sudden
movement. "Look what you made me do!"

This was Utahime's favorite tavern… He had to fix it, or else she'd find out for sure.

Satoru sighed again and conjured up a piece of chalk. "This will be nice and quick, but don't
you move, or I might forget where you are and pop you on accident," he said and quickly
drew a small magic circle.

He stepped in the middle and clasped his hands together, aiming to reverse all the damage
instead of fixing it per say. Reversing it was slightly harder, but it would save all the ruined
alcohol that had spilled all over the place. It was just inanimate objects anyway, it would be
easy. The forms still knew what shape they needed to take. He didn't have to warp anything,
all he had to do was give them the order to return to form.

Keeping his eyes locked on Kusakabe's Satoru took a deep breath and gathered just enough
energy to put the spell in motion. All of the broken glass around them began to glow the
same blue that pulsed from the circle at his feet before slowly reversing back to their original
states, alcohol perfectly intact.

"There!" He grinned and stepped out of the circle and erased it with his heel, spinning in a
circle to follow the shape. "Oh— one more thing," he mumbled and snapped his fingers,
everyone's glass refilled, and then he pressed his fingers to his lips. "Bibe et obliviscere," he
whispered under his breath.

Everyone except Kusakabe took a drink from their glass, and a second later the normal
chatter that typically filled the tavern resumed.

"T-That's very illegal," Kusakabe said, eyes wide.

"You and I both know you're not saying shit unless of course you want me to make charms
out of your fucking teeth, if that's the case– then by all means~" Satoru said, and waltzed out
of the building "I'll sell 'em for 75% off too!" He yelled over his shoulder.

.
As soon as he got back he took a long bath to relax and clear his head. He still felt a little
jittery, but he was able to fully calm down with a few deep breaths.

He had to make it up to Utahime somehow, because he could still tell she was pissed. It was
fine though, she'd get over it. She had to since he was so gracious and willing to forgive her
grave transgression.

He said she approached him first... why? In what world would Utahime want a witch to touch
her?

It didn't make any sense. Especially with how by the book she was!

Unable to sleep, Satoru spent the night in the kitchen prepping food for the week. Utahime
typically did this, but he needed something to do, so she was out of luck.

Plus, it had been awhile since he prepped a week's worth of food.

He made bacon and eggs for breakfast, timing it to be done as soon as Utahime woke up.

As soon as he heard her little paws step into the kitchen he turned to her.

"Mornin' Hime!" He said, smiling.

She glared at him and jumped up on the table. "Mornin."

Satoru sighed and set a plate of food in front of her. "Look, I'm sorry about yesterday."

She glanced up at him. "Oh? No way you're actually apologizing. What did you do this
time?"

He pursed his lips. What did I do?

Yeah, she was right, he hardly ever apologized, but he was honestly trying to extend an olive
branch here. Even if she was still mad about him forcing her to cut her date short, he didn't
think he deserved her attitude.

He let her do whatever she wanted– something that was unheard of! All he asked for in return
was a little respect that she seemed keen on depriving him of as of late…

He shrugged. "Nothing, I know when I'm in the wrong, so I wanted to clear the air. I'm sorry,
Utahime… I shouldn't have forced you to come home like that."

Her expression softened. "Oh… really?"

He nodded. "Of course! You already know I don't care if the whole town plays around with
my pretty little pussy— so long as it isn't a witch, especially not a sorcerer~!" he smirked and
all but slammed a cup of coffee in front of her.
She flinched as the liquid inside flew up out of the cup, but he effortlessly stopped it and
pushed it back in the mug without batting an eye.

"Oh! But I'm sure you knew that, I mean, after what I went through— what we went through,
almost dying, fighting for our lives, my freedom, my soul, and all that good stuff, something
like that shouldn't even have to be mentioned~!" He finished with a wild grin.

His sunglasses abruptly cracked across both lenses.

It shouldn't have needed to be mentioned!

It was larger than the current cracks, deeper, and further obstructed his vision, splitting her
little face into two sections. In one shard of his lense he saw the angry face full of resentment
that she so often wore around him lately, in the other shard, he saw the girl that used to
stargaze with him, the one that once smiled at every little spell he did, the one that eagerly bet
her life on him, the girl that saved him…

How could you…? A sorcerer, Hime? Really?

Her eyes were so huge as she stared at him that she looked like a toy.

He was actually very angry still, and he only realized that when he saw her ears sink back
against her head.

She transformed into her human form. "Gojo, I'm s—"

He pressed his thumb and forefinger together, forcing her into silence.

He barely recognized her anymore…

Utahime shrunk down, her shoulders caving into her body.

Satoru held her wide gaze until his own food burned, then he turned and threw the whole pan
away, and went downstairs to open the shop.
Chapter End Notes

Wanted to get this out a little early for everyone– I'm too hyped by the build up. (Train wreck?
Idk)

Bibe et obliviscere: drink and forget

 Chapter 4
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

Utahime stopped going out, but the tension between them only seemed to get worse.

She always had a short fuse in comparison to him, but their proximity only seemed to make
her temperament worse, and it was slowly rubbing off on him.

It was stressing him out.

He could barely have a full conversation with Utahime without her getting mad at him. The
more he focused on it, the more he noticed it happened.

Lazy, annoying, idiot, petty little insults that once bounced off him like fluffs of cottonwood
now stuck to his skin like burrs.

Despite how it looked, he was actually trying to be civil with her, he was even going out of
his way to be nicer to her, but that only seemed to make things worse.

"Do you need anything from the garden?" Utahime asked as she changed to her human form
so she could grab the basket that was left by the back door of the shop.

"Oh, no, I already got everything," Satoru said while he organized some inventory.

"What? Why?"

"Well, it's still raining, so I figured I'd just get the stuff myself so you won't have—"

"That's my job, Gojo!" Utahime snapped and dropped the basket by the door to march over to
him.

He repressed a sigh and turned to face her. "Like I said, since it's still raining I thought—"

" I thought we agreed not to use magic for my chores!" She growled, her face red with anger.

"I didn't I got everything by hand, so—"

"That's not the point!" She yelled, her hands balled into fists. "Why do you keep trying to do
my job?! Is my work not good enough for you?!"

He frowned deeply and tried to grab her hand but she ripped her hand away. "Utahime… I'm
just trying to help you, it's raining still, I didn't want you to get caught in it."

"We have an umbrella that works fine!"

"Shouldn't you be thanking me?!" He asked, exasperated.

"What for?!"

"I dunno– maybe for being nice!?"

She scowled and jammed her finger into his chest, her nail like a stake. "You're not being
nice, Gojo, you're infantilizing me!"

"What??"

"I'm not weak! A little rain isn't going to kill me!"

"Can't you just say thank you?!"

"Gojo, you're not getting it! I didn't ask you to do that!"

"You're making a mountain out of an anthill!"

Her scowl deepened and she stuck her nose up. "Fine. Thank you," she snapped and stormed
off.

Satoru sighed heavily and hit his head against a nearby shelf.

He used to help her in the garden all the time. They took turns often if the other wasn't
available to tend the plants. He thought she'd appreciate that he made the time to give her a
hand, but evidently he only managed to upset her more.

He didn't think Utahime was the territorial type, but maybe she was.

But a few days later when he found her lounging in her cat form on the couch and he decided
to sit next to her, he realized that maybe she really didn't like being near him.

As soon as he sat down she got up and moved to the other end of the couch.

Frowning, he moved back to her side, and heard her tsk as she stood up again.

Typically, he'd laugh and shrug her off, but lately he'd become hyper aware of all her little
reactions, and her little lip smack bruised him a little.
He caught her when she jumped off the couch, and pulled her in close to his chest.

"Let me go!" She snapped before he could even get a word in.

"Oh stop, I just want to hold you—"

"Well I don't want to be held!" She growled and squirmed more.

"C'mon, I know you like it when I pet you, stop pretending that you hate it!" He complained.

She escaped his hold and jumped a few feet away from him, her ears low against her head.
"I am not pretending! I'm not a lapcat Gojo! In case you forgot!"

"Only because you pretend that—"

"I'm not! Don't touch me anymore! I hate it! I've always hated it!" She growled and rushed
out of the room.

He could only stare in shock at where she had been as her words slowly sank in. An
uncomfortable chill seeped into his bones and he sat back with a sigh as he stared off into
space.

His eyes refocused on the sharp cracks splitting his vision and he pursed his lips.

Her words just didn't sit right with him because he had memories of her happily snuggling up
to his side. He had memories of waking up with her asleep on his chest or in the crook of his
neck when he'd fallen asleep alone.

A simple pet between her ears made her purr, and he knew she hadn't been faking that. At
one point she'd close her eyes and nuzzle into his palm whenever he held his hand out to
her.

Hadn't she?

He grimaced and slouched low on the couch. The best thing would probably be to give her
space. They weren't teenagers anymore, so it made sense in a way if she was different…

He wanted to believe that's all it was. He'd give her space, and simply wait for her to seek
him out.

Leaving her alone was harder than he thought. He always caught himself in the middle of
reaching out to tug on her tail or poke her face. He caught himself before each time, and
eventually figured out it was easier to avoid pestering her if he stopped trying to talk to her
all together.
And after a week he stopped initiating conversation as much.

When he wasn't watching the shop, he was lost in his head. Sometimes he drifted even while
he was running the shop, and he would suddenly realize he was doing tasks he had no
memory of starting.

He learned the spell he needed to sever their bond quite easily, but he'd been spending most
of his time trying to figure out just what went wrong between them.

The best he got from asking her was, I'm fine, I'm tired, or I just need a drink.

Pressing her got him into an argument, so he stopped asking all together.

On top of all that, sleep was evading him, and every day he was feeling just a bit worse for
wear. It was harder for him to focus, his attention span was a wreck, he messed up potions
more often, and he started to feel really sick…

He needed a breather.

"What the hell is this?!"

Satoru turned around in his chair only to get smacked in the face by a flier. Unfazed, he
picked it up to look it over, but when he saw what it was he set it aside.

"An ad," he rasped out before clearing his throat and turning back to his desk. His chest was
hurting a lot lately, something as simple as breathing hurt.

If it was really quiet, a small rattling could be heard with each breath he took.

Healing himself didn't help, and he didn't want to bother Utahime, so he attempted to make
himself medicine to cure whatever ailments he may have caught.

Surprisingly, nothing seemed to work…

"I know, moron! Why? You don't need an assistant!" Utahime yelled.

He sighed and pressed his hand against his temple. Why did she sound so offended? "Uh… I
know I don't need one, but it'll be nice to not be glued to the shop every—"

"Then what am I for!?"

He laughed dryly. "C'mon, Utahime, I know you hate minding the shop… you always get
upset when I ask you to, so I figured this would be a good solution," he said. "You should be
grateful I'm finally taking your comments seriously."

She scowled and jammed her finger in his face. "I don't hate it! I just can't stand the kind of
customers you cater to! I tell you every time that it isn't good to attract certain types to the
shop!"

He sighed heavily and rubbed his temples again. "I've actually taken quite a lot of things off
the shelf at your behest, you know? And I've had to make a lot of compromises on the
budget to do it… Where did you get this anyway?"

She crossed her arms. "Some woman brought it in, she wasn't even going to buy anything,
she just kept asking for you—"

He stood up automatically. "Oh, she's a candidate then," he mumbled and hurried downstairs
to see if she was still around.

When he got to the counter he saw a blonde woman standing there humming to herself.

"Hello, are–" his voice was so rough he had to clear his throat. "–ahem– are you here for the
job?" Satoru asked her.

She looked up at him and nodded, her cheeks flushing bright pink. "Y-Yes! I'm Akemi, it's an
honor to meet you, Master Gojo!" She said and reached her hand out to him.

Utahime jumped up on the counter as a cat and swiped at her hand with a hiss.

Akemi gasped and jumped back, her eyes wide.

"Don't mind her," he said and tried to nudge Utahime off the counter, but she remained in
place, surprisingly steadfast and solid.

He raised his brow in confusion, and she simply growled in response.

"Ahem, so, you're not a witch… why do you want this job?" He asked the woman.

Her blush deepened and she looked down. "W-Well… I need a job to help my family, and the
ad didn't say it was restricted to witches only…" she mumbled.
"Hm, true…" he felt Utahime wrap around his neck as a scarf, just tight enough to be
uncomfortable.

"No. Tell her to go away," she said in his head.

"Here," he said and conjured up a piece of parchment and a quill. "Write your name, address
and skillset, I'll reach out with a response one way or another."

Akemi reached for the parchment, but he held it away from her and set it on the counter
instead, laying the quill beside it.

She moved over to it and bent over the counter so she could write down her information.

Utahime squeezed him tighter and he grunted and moved over to the storage room so he
could talk to her freely.

"What?" He snapped, annoyed.

She changed back to her cat form and jumped on a nearby crate. "What do you mean, what? I
don't want her here!" She growled out.

"Why not? She seems nice," he said.

"She's not needed, Gojo, you really want to cut your finances more to pay some girl we don't
need?" Utahime asked, her fur starting to stick up.

Satoru bit the inside of his cheek as he stared at her. She looked adorable. She was so puffed
up. The last time he saw her like that was when they first met.

She had been even tinier back then… tiny little ball of fury…

"What's so funny?!" She growled angrily.

He sighed and absently poked around at his shelves. "You're fussing for no reason, I'm just
doing this so I don't have to bother you all the time, I thought you'd be happy, you know." He
said in exasperation. "I'm tired of this— Tell me what you want, Utahime. Whatever it is, I'll
do it."

Her ears flattened against her head. "I don't want her here."

"Then I'll just wait for the next candidate," he grumbled in defeat.

"No."

"No?"

"We don't need another person!" She insisted, her tail flicking angrily behind her.

"I think we do though, I'd like to be able to study and practice my magic, I need to get better,
and I don't want to bother you anymore, so this is the best option, besides, I've been really
tired lately," he said as calmly as he could.

"You're just lazy, Gojo, you can't go a day without bothering me. You can't expect me to
believe that!"

He scoffed in offense. He honestly didn't think she was serious when she told him she
couldn't stand him, but now that he thought about it, maybe he'd been oblivious to it. And
now she was doubting him?

Now that he thought about it, maybe she was serious when she said she hated him.

Did she regret the fact that she was bound to him? When did that even happen?

She'd been so steadfast in her support for him growing up. His only light in an otherwise
bleak existence.

When he spent every single day of his seventeenth year fighting, it was Utahime that gave
him the drive to face each opponent.

When he thought he couldn't actually make it to the end of the day it was Utahime that lent
him her strength, her determination, her stubbornness to finish the duel, to get out of bed and
prepare for yet another fight.

For a year straight, he fought two to three of the king's sorcerers a day, every day of the week
until he was free. And for a year straight she was his strength, his courage…

The last victory had been the hardest, the sweetest, it had been the only time in his life that he
cried on his own accord.

He thought he was going to break, and as much as he hated talking about it, he knew he went
a little crazy due to that whole ordeal, but she never left his side for that year. She was glued
to his shoulder, he firmly believed it was her constant vigil that kept him from falling off the
deep end. She kept him in tact, she kept him together.

Satoru reached out to her and lifted her little face up, but she shirked away from him, an
angry growl once again sounding through the air— haunting him.

My little ball of fury… so unhappy… why?

He was trying to save it– save them, their partnership, their friendship , but he had no idea
what to do. He really thought getting an assistant would fix the issue, but he had no idea she'd
be so upset over it.

His throat burned a bit, the feeling wasn't unknown to him, though it was uncommon.
"Okay…" he mumbled in defeat. "I'll take the fliers down, will that make you happy?" He
asked around the lump in his throat.

She nodded. "Yes! That's what I have been saying, idiot. If you would have listened the first
time we wouldn't have had to have this stupid argument!"

He frowned and pursed his lips in irritation. He could only brush off so much of her insolence
before it really got to him.

Moron, lazy, idiot… He was a fucking genius , and she knew it! He was a damned prodigy, a
legend! And yet, she insisted on spitting in his face…

Why… why… why?

He knelt in front of her and grabbed her little face between his fingers again, tight so she
couldn't pull away.

"Careful, Utahime," he muttered and squeezed her face ever so slightly. "You're clearly
forgetting that you have the mouth you do because I have allowed it," he said, not bothering
to hide his displeasure.

He held her furious gaze until she caved and averted her eyes.

"Watch the front," he demanded and left the room.

He swept straight out of the shop, ignoring the long line of customers that were waiting to be
helped.

It was still raining.

Satoru used one of the first spells he crafted to keep the rain from hitting him— limitless, as
he called it. Like the name suggested, there wasn't really a limit to what he could do with it.
Keeping things from touching him was just a fraction of what it could do. He rather liked the
ambiguity and mystic that came with such a name.

All he had to do was snap his fingers, and all of the fliers would turn to ash, but he went
about taking them down by hand
He needed time to think.

Every time he found a flier it burnt up when he touched it, leaving behind no evidence it had
been there. Finding them was easy, each flier had a small trace of his magic clinging to it. It
was so easy that he zoned out as he walked through the city.

He didn't actually enjoy lording over the control he had over Utahime over her head, but she
was making it difficult not to at least remind her.

Maybe her ego was just as big as she claimed his was. After all, they were children when
they bonded to each other, their magic grew together, just at closely as they had.

They'd been together for all of the awkward phases of growing up, their lives merged
together as closely as their souls were— at least how they used to be.

They were closer to strangers now that he thought about it, as much as it felt wrong and out
of place to even think.

How could your own shadow not belong to you?

If he'd actually done something to earn her ire he wouldn't have even considered making such
threats, but he did nothing wrong. Nothing that he could think of at least, and most
importantly, nothing of substance that he could get out of her.

He caught his reflection in the glass of one of the shops lining the street and paused. He
looked terrible, like he'd been washed out.

Damn, he actually looked as bad as he felt…

He had dark shadows beneath his eyes that he never really had before, it was a bit jarring. He
looked a little eerie, almost like a specter.

Frowning, he pressed his hand against his chest and sent yet another healing pulse through
himself, but he still didn't feel any different. The pain in his chest remained, a sharp stinging
pain that made each breath feel like tiny needles were stabbing into his nerves.

"Maybe I just need a good nap…" he said to himself with a sigh. Movement in the reflection
caught his eye, and he glanced up to see two black crows sitting on a light post behind him,
staring, watching him.

Satoru spun around and they flew off. He held his hand out towards them, aiming to force
them back, imagined popping them, but evidently let them go with a sigh.

"You're overthinking too much lately…" he said, grimacing.

He felt a familiar presence suddenly step into his perimeter and he turned towards it with a
scowl.

"Thought I told you to get lost, Atsuya," Satoru spat, not in the mood to even fake
pleasantries.

"You actually didn't, besides I'm here on official business," Kusakabe said and boldly walked
up to him.

Satoru narrowed his eyes and cast infinity to keep him a good meter away from him.
"Whatever, now I'm telling you to get lost, I don't want to see you here again, this is my
town."

"Sure kid, you can't claim a town like that," he grumbled and reached into his coat. He took
out an envelope and held it out to him. "Here, this is a letter from His Majesty—"

Satoru set it on fire. The letter sparked a bright yellow, resisting the spell, before a snapping
sound echoed out, and the letter was engulfed in bright blue flames that consumed even the
ash left behind.

"Whoa! Hey, what the hell? How did you do that?" Kusakabe demanded, eyes wide.

"You're testing my patience!" Satoru growled before falling into a coughing fit.

"Uh– are you alright? You kind of look like shit."

A second uninvited guest appeared beside them. A scrawny, mousy looking man that he
hadn't seen in a while. "D-Don't say that!" He gasped, his voice trembling.

Satoru glanced at him and relaxed slightly. "Oh! Ijichi! Long time no see, I almost forgot this
loser was your Master!"

Ijichi gasped and bowed. "I'm so sorry for his unpleasant—"

"Oi! Don't apologize for me!"

Satoru lifted his hand up and closed it into a fist, forcing Kusakabe's mouth shut. "Ah-ah, I
want to hear what he has to say, go on, Ijichi, you have my permission to speak," he said, his
grin wolfish.

Ijichi nervously glanced between him and Kusakabe before ultimately deciding what the best
decision would be.
"I'm sorry for his unpleasant attitude, he's just upset that you've been doing illegal things—"

Satoru smirked. "Oh, Atsu, I thought we agreed not to share secrets~!"

Kusakabe angrily argued back muffled nonsense.

"H-He didn't m-make any reports!!" Ijichi gasped.

Satoru sighed dramatically and shook his head. "Fine, I'll let this slide, just because I like
you, Ijichi~ Tell me, where were you when me and Atsu here were hanging out? You were
woefully missed."

"Oh, um… thank you, Master Gojo… I was… Well, I was actually researching the weather
anomaly, " the scrawny man said.

Satoru smirked. He was going to throw his weight around a little more. "Aw, of course he's
got you doing all the grunt work, you know, Ijichi, if you ever get tired of Atsu here, you can
always come work for me, I'll pay you and everything!"

Kusakabe interjected with more muffled nonsense— annoying.

"Oh, uh, I appreciate the offer but, I could never—"

"Just keep it in the back of your mind, let it simmer a little," Satoru said with a grin.

"O-Okay…"

"Great! Now can you tell me what your loser Master wants?"

Ijichi nodded and cleared his throat. "We were sent to investigate, and put a stop to the
abnormal weather patterns—"

Satoru held his hand out as thin drops of water bounced off his infinity. "Yes, yes, you
mentioned. How's that working out for you?"

"Erm… we're in the process!"

"Good luck~"

"Uhm… the letter! It was a summons, His Highness wants you to report to the capital…"
Ijichi finally explained.

Satoru rolled his eyes. "Of course… Well! You've done your job so you can get going now."

Ijichi didn't budge. "Uh, could you please release Master Kusakabe?"

"Eh? He's not stuck to the ground," Satoru made a shooing motion. "Go on, bu-bye."

"H-His voice, Master Gojo…"

"Oh! Shoot!" He snapped his fingers. "I was hoping you'd forget," he said and finally opened
his hand, releasing Kusakabe from the grip he had on him.

"Damn, Gojo, you know, you could help with the damn rain, that way, we can get out of here
faster," Kusakabe complained.

He leaned back on his heels and hummed and hawed. "Uhh… weelll— No."

Kusakabe sighed and turned to leave. "Let's go, Ijichi."

"Right!" He said and returned to his pin form on Kusakabe's jacket.

Satoru watched them leave before wandering off to sit by the docks.

He sat down at an abandoned pier and looked out across the water to where he knew the
capital was. It would take a week to get there by horseback.

As much as he'd love to snub the old bastard, he didn't think it was a good idea to keep
delaying the inevitable… He didn't think he'd ever willingly go back.

Grimacing, he took out the letter the knight had dropped off for him a few days ago.

He hadn't read it yet, but he had a feeling he knew what it said. They always asked him to go
on complicated missions for them, and he always refused, no matter what they offered him.
What was more valuable than the freedom he already had? They couldn't pay him enough to
make up for what they took from him…

He tore it open and looked it over. To his surprise, there was only one sentence.

Get your ass down here kid, you've finally pissed off the wrong person.

"Oh," that was not what he expected. Even though the letter wasn't signed, he knew that hand
writing. It belonged to one of his old teachers, Yaga, the only Sorcerer part of the king's army
that refused to fight him when he challenged the crown.

That refusal got him demoted severally, but he did not waver in his resolve. He's just a kid!
He had shouted in protest.
And though it got him demoted, that refusal had earned his old teacher a spot on Satoru's very
small list of people he actually respected.

A much better thing to be a part of in his humble opinion…

Satoru sighed and tucked the letter in his coat. If Yaga was messaging him, then it must be
serious. There was also a possibility that they were giving him a hard time because of the
weather. And as much as Satoru pretended not to care, he didn't actually want to give the old
man a hard time…

The weather was one of the things the crown had on its list of forbidden things to mess with
— a shame too, since magic could help a ton with drought.

Luckily, one could apply to have a court ordered sorcerer travel to a town affected by a dry
spell to get it to rain, but the application process was long and strenuous.

Though, it was an understandable restriction that was put in place after a couple of witches
caused immense flooding a few years back that ended up destroying two towns…

He wasn't really worried about that happening now, even if it had been raining for a little over
a week. Besides, The Crown already had someone out here to take care of it.

The thing that was worrying him was the growing rift between Utahime and him.

No matter what he did it only felt like he was making it worse.

But he owed her his life, and he thought it was worth doing his best to make her happy, but
he was starting to think that meant setting her free.

Asking Utahime what she wanted hadn't helped things at all, because she seemed keen on
lying to him, and that only made him feel worse. So he stopped asking.

There was a saying that Yaga used to say about impossible things— it's like reversing the
flow of a river.

Some things weren't possible, but wasn't that why he was born? To do the impossible?

He could do it.
If anyone could reverse the flow of a river, it would be him.

But it wouldn't be natural…

He didn't want to force Utahime to be happy… even though it would be easy…

She wouldn't be Utahime anymore— at least not his Utahime… his Hime…

The sun was sitting on the horizon when he felt Utahime's presence approach. She jumped
next to him, soaked from the rain, and when he saw her, he couldn't help but smile.

She looked hilarious, drenched to the bone, a sad little cat, drenched, when she could have
changed to her other form and used the umbrella by the door.

Unfortunately as soon as she looked at him she growled. "Don't laugh! Why are you just
sitting here?"

He sighed heavily and bent his leg so he could lean his cheek on his knee. "Are you on the
rag or something? Or do you get heats like real—"

She transformed and swung to slap him. He high fived her, knocking her hand away.

"What the fuck, Gojo?!" She growled angrily.

He grabbed her face tightly and yanked her close to his face. " Why are you so irritable
lately?" He asked, annoyed.

Her eyes widened and she tried to pull away, but he tightened his grip until her cheeks were
comically squished. He would have smiled if he wasn't so annoyed himself.

He couldn't tell if his irritation was his own or influenced by hers, but it was definitely much
stronger than he could remember feeling.

" Why?" He demanded and shook her face a little.

Her eyes widened and she looked down. "I-I'm sorry…I—"

"I don't want an apology, Utahime, I want a fucking answer!" He said through his teeth.
"What is going on? All you do is yell at me lately!"

"Let me go! You're hurting me! "

His stomach dropped and he immediately let her go. Hurting her was the last thing he wanted
to do…
A heavy silence settled between them, and to his surprise, Utahime shifted back into a cat and
hesitantly nudged his hand with her nose.

On the third nudge she managed to get her head under his hand, and he glanced down, noting
how her whole head was hidden beneath his palm.

A smile worked its way onto his face and he scooped her up and pulled her closer, encasing
her in his infinity, shielding her from the rain. He held his other hand over her and pulled all
of the water off her body.

She surprised him again by snuggling into the fold of his arm.

He sighed and pulled her up to his chest and leaned forward against his knees, squishing her
closer to him. She squeaked a little from the pressure, but didn't try to leave like he expected,
so he buried his face in her fur and focused on her heartbeat.

It was fluttering faster than he thought it should be, and he absently wondered if her form
affected her heart rate since smaller creatures tended to have faster beats.

But the thing that occupied his mind the most right now was how much he was going to miss
her.

It was pretty clear to him right now that there was no saving their bond. He could tell even
now how thin it was.

He pressed his face further into her fur and closed his eyes.

If he wanted to preserve their friendship it just made the most sense to cut the remaining
threads that bound them together.

For whatever reason, be it time or something unknown, they'd drifted, and his Hime wasn't
really his anymore, and he didn't realize it until it was too late.

Maybe it was because he gave her too much freedom, he wasn't sure.

Cutting the bond now would at least make it so they could remain friends– at least it should
preserve whatever friendship they still had.

He reached up and gently pet her between the ears and subconsciously tightened his hold on
her further.

Once again a voice in the back of his head urged him to force her into submission. He'd be
well within his right to do so, well within his right to break her– just a little.

He could soften her up a little— His fingers snaked around her neck— he could make her a
little more pliant, force her to be more agreeable. Turn her into his perfect little shadow…

She wouldn't even know!

He absently pressed his fingers into her tiny little throat.

Such a tiny little thing causing him such a huge inconvenience…

But she wouldn't be my Hime anymore…

But did that really matter? If he was going to lose her regardless, wouldn't it be better if he
still got to keep her by his side?

She belonged to him didn't she? All he had to do was remind her.

She wouldn't know, but he'd know.

He couldn't do it. Damnit...

Sighing, he went back to petting her.

Satoru didn't care what people thought of him. They could curse and hate him all they wanted
and he wouldn't even bat an eye.

Utahime was the only one who's opinion of him actually mattered, and as much as he didn't
want to admit it, his ego couldn't survive it if she grew to actually hate him.

He was already struggling with the idea that she was dancing on the edge of completely
writing him off. Why else would she be disrespecting him so easily?

His throat began to burn again and he quickly forced it away because lately, whenever that
happened the burn spread to his eyes…

That was the last thing he wanted.

She started to purr a few moments later and he couldn't help but smile.

Such a little liar… He thought ruefully.

The small vibrations from her purrs seemed to help ease the strange pain in his chest, like ice
on a bruise.
Satoru sat with her until the sun set, watched the ball of fire until he could no longer see its
light before he stood with a sigh and carried Utahime home.

The shop was closed up, everything cleaned and put away. He noticed a list pinned to his
board in her handwriting recording all of the things out of stock.

Sleep tonic
Weather ward
Weather charms
Wealth charms
Protection potion
Flu Elixir

At the bottom under a section labeled: Special requests, were two things. Love potion x2, and
a knowledge spell.

He sighed and walked straight to his room. He flopped down on his bed and tucked Utahime
close to his chest, bracing himself for her to freak and jump away like she always did.

Except this time she didn't, and he almost wished she did, because her staying only made the
thought of saying goodbye that much harder.

"I've been summoned to the capital," he mumbled into her fur.

"About the rain?" she whispered.

"Kinda, mainly for something else… I got a letter from Yaga, he didn't really say what it is,
but it's him, so I know it must be serious, though I imagine they want to see me about the
storm too…"

"You're not going, right?" She asked softly.

He sighed again and shifted under his blankets, keeping her close. If this happened a few
weeks ago, he wouldn't have even read the letter. He would have torn it up in the knight's face
and turned it into colorful confetti, maybe even added a little horn sound for the effect.

Now?

"I'm going…"

"What? Why?"

"I need to… take care of a few things down there, so I might as well see what the old man
wants," he said. "And if he needs help, the least I can do is hear him out."

"Right…okay, when are we going?"

"We'll set out tomorrow," he sighed.

Chapter End Notes

I've got a chapter written in Utahime's pov that will shed a bit of light on the situation,
though it'll be a few chapters before it drops!

Thank you for reading!

 Chapter 5
Chapter Summary

Gojo loses patience with Utahime in this chapter, and he gets a bit of insight from her.
Though he also discovers things that leave him with many questions.

Chapter Notes

This is another long one. 😅

Click for additional note

Thank you for reading!

When Satoru walked into the kitchen in the morning, he was surprised to see Utahime
standing by the woodstove, brewing something.

Whatever it was it smelled pretty good, it left a slightly sweet aroma in the air.

As soon as she saw him she quickly climbed on the counter to reach into the cupboard.

"G-Gojo! You're up early, I thought you'd sleep longer…" she mumbled.

He leaned against the doorway and crossed his arms. Her energy was very muted today,
which was odd because lately it was always so hectic.

"I made something for you," she mumbled when he didn't respond. "Why didn't you tell me
you weren't feeling well?" She asked, her tone surprisingly soft. "I-I heard you having trouble
breathing last night… is everything alright? Why didn't you make yourself medicine?"

"I tried," he sighed and lifted his sunglasses so he could rub his eyes. "You were too angry to
listen."

She frowned and big her lip. "Oh… and you've made medicine?"

"Mhm, nothing is working…"

"What?" She frowned deeply and carefully poured her mixture into his mug. "Did you poison
yourself again?"
He shook his head. "Not this time," he murmured, his voice was pretty rough now, even after
clearing his throat he sounded bad.

Frowning she moved over to him and held his mug out. "Can you… try this? I'm not sure if
it'll help but…"

He silently accepted the mug from her and inspected the contents. The liquid was a dull
orange, he could smell ginger and something citrusy. On the surface it looked like some kind
of thick tea, but he could feel her warm magic swirling in it, giving it a deeper, different kind
of warmth above simple temperature.

He was shocked how soothing just the first sip was. It warmed him so suddenly that he
visibly shuddered. It gave him goosebumps.

She watched him closely, her brows furrowed in concern. "How do you feel?"

He moved over to the table and sank down on the chair with a sigh. "Better…" he mumbled
and took another drink, this time much larger. It made him shiver again, and he had to set the
mug down so as not to spill it.

She changed into her cat form and jumped up on the table. "How much better?" She asked
quietly.

He stared at her for a few beats then pointed to the chair across from him. "Change back," he
demanded just as softly.

She hesitated for just a beat before she jumped on the chair and changed back to her human
form.

He just stared at her as she sat there worrying her lip with her teeth, her eyes downcast, and
her shoulders caved in on themselves.

He let her squirm while he watched her magic energy start to swirl around restlessly. It
wavered and shook almost as if she were frightened. He found that curious, what would she
have to be afraid of? Surely no one would dare to hurt her while he was around.

Satoru absently sipped at the drink she made for him while he stared at her. Each sip soothed
the bruising pain just a bit more until the ache was muted in the background. It was still there,
but he felt so much better that he could ignore the remaining pain.

He also couldn't help but notice this was the first time they sat together so calmly in quite a
long time– even if it was somewhat forced, though to be fair, he wasn't keeping her from
leaving.

"Gojo?" She said, still so uncharacteristically soft.

"You're afraid, why?"

"I'm n—"
He narrowed his eyes and she silenced herself.

"You've also lied a lot lately," he murmured and slowly drew a small magic circle on the table
the size of his palm, scorched it into the wood like fire on a page. "Neither of us is moving
until you answer my questions."

The fear he felt in her energy spiked, and he frowned as the cold whisper of it pulled at his
psyche.

"You're afraid," he said again.

He counted ten seconds before she nodded.

"Why?"

"Y-You… never get sick…" she whispered.

"And?"

She frowned and squirmed in the chair. "A-And I'm worried…"

"Mh, but that's hardly a reason to be afraid, Utahime," he drawled as he watched her, never
taking his eyes off hers.

"It is! I should have know… I don't understand why I couldn't feel that you were ill!" She
said, her voice trembling.

"And that makes you afraid?"

Her frown deepened and she squirmed a bit more, obviously attempting to get up in vain. "I-I
don't want to lose you…" she finally whispered after failing to stand three times.

He smirked. "Why? 'cause you'll die too?"

Normally, if a witch got sick, their familiar would also experience the same symptoms. They
even shared physical pain. So he found it curious that Utahime seemed completely
unaffected. It was bittersweet, because on one hand he didn't want her to be in pain, but on
the other, didn't that just explain how thin their connection was now?

That it deteriorated so quickly was a bit jarring, he couldn't make sense of it.

"No!" Utahime snapped, her brows deeply furrowed. "I don't want to lose you– because I...
care about you. It has nothing to do with myself. Why is that so hard to understand?"

His brows rose in surprise. He hadn't expected that at all, and he was momentarily stunned.
"You... still care about me?" He asked, unable to hide his shock. She hadn't given him any
reason to believe that as of late...

She nodded, and strangely, her fear only seemed to increase. "Of course I do... you're my
friend..."
"Hm, but you're still afraid, what for? Is it me?"

She shook her head.

"Not afraid of me… yet you are trembling, why?" He asked and looked her over once more,
trying to see if he could find the reason why she seemed so terrified.

"I-I'm… afraid of... of what you might learn…" she whispered, her large eyes beginning to
water.

He smiled wryly and finished the contents in his mug, the warmth gave him a final chill, and
he sighed as the relief swept over him. It wasn't perfect, but he felt so much better.

"I already know, Hime," he murmured as he pushed the mug aside.

She gasped and she sat up straighter. "W-What?! H-How? I tried so hard to— Y-You're not
mad??"

Satoru sighed and carefully took his sunglasses off so he could see her unobstructed.
"Furious, actually…" he thought he was over it, but seeing that bastard yesterday only
refreshed the bitterness festering in his gut.

The color drained from her face. "I-I'm sorry! I… I don't know what to say, I really didn't
intend for this to happen!"

He frowned. "What do you even mean? He said you approached him first, and he wasn't
lying, Utahime."

Her eyes widened further. "W-Wha? Who are you– what?"

"You really don't know? Are there more?" As he asked it, his chest felt tight. He was willing
to give her the benefit of the doubt.

She's been drinking, so maybe she didn't completely realize she was messing around with
Kusakabe. He knew that probably wasn't the case, but he wanted to give her that…

But how could she not know he knew after he hinted at it previously?

"I-I don't understand, Gojo…" she whispered honestly.

He huffed and leaned forward across the table. "I know about Kusakabe, Utahime. I found his
hair on your dress. You've been seeing him, even after what we went through… How could
you?"

A storm of emotions passed through her that he didn't quite understand, but when she took a
deep breath, the deep fear he was feeling didn't feel as prominent anymore.

"I… I didn't think about it at first… he surrendered the fight pretty quickly… so… I guess…
I thought it was okay," she whispered.
Satoru sighed and leaned back in the chair again. Kusakabe had surrendered early on in the
fignt– the coward that he was.

"You still should have known how I'd feel about that," he said, frowning.

"You're right… I shouldn't have even talked to him… it was shameful," she whispered and
hung her head. "I'm so sorry…"

He tapped his finger on the table. "No. Look at me until we are done here. Or I'll make you."

She frowned and slowly looked him in the eyes again.

"I thought you were against the idea of witches using your kind for pleasure, do you not find
it disgusting anymore?" He asked curiously.

She started to worry her lip between her teeth again, and that fear slowly resurfaced. "It is!"
She said as her eyes watered. "It's degrading and shameful..."

"And yet, you approached him first… tell me, why is that?" He asked slowly.

She started to tremble again, and when she didn't speak he leaned forward slightly.

"Tell me, Utahime."

Even her voice trembled when she spoke. "I-I wanted… t-to feel what it was like…"

"Be specific."

Tears rolled down her cheeks. She tried to speak a few times but her voice was nothing more
than a terrified whisper.

Satoru sighed and asked what he already knew. "What? Being pleasured by a witch?"

She wiped her face nodded slowly.

He smirked, slightly amused. "So, what was it like? Did you enjoy stooping down to such a
lowly state? Were you going to let him fuck you?"

Her face flushed a bright scarlet and she looked away. "G-Gojo!"

"Ah-ah, eyes on me, Utahime. I didn't give you permission to look away. Disobey me again,
and I'll lock your neck in place, understand?" He asked as the corner of his lips twitched up
into a cold smirk.

Her eyes widened further and she nodded quickly.

"Do. You. Understand?" He slowly repeated.

"Y-Yes!" She squeaked.

"Yes, what?"
"I-I understand you!"

His smirk grew. "Soo? Don't leave me hanging here~ What was it like? Did he call you a
good girl? ~ Maybe he called you sweetheart? Did he make you get on your knees? Did you
wish he did? Were you excited at the idea of taking his cock?"

"G-Gojo, stop, please!" She begged quietly.

"Oh, but why? I deserve to know. You know how disrespectful you were being— have been.
He said you were shy, I can hardly believe that. My Utahime isn't shy. She's prickly, she's
bitchy, she's proud and stubborn. She would never degrade herself like that. She would never
let a witch touch her like she was some worthless whore."

"I'm sorry…" she whispered, more tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Answer the question, Utahime," he demanded.

"I-I liked… and hated it at the same time…" she whispered.

"Were you going to let him fuck you?" He asked again.

"Y-You're being cruel…"

"I'm being quite gracious, Utahime. Surely you know that. You've seen it happen many times
at the capital, how your kind is treated for so much less. Surely you know if I was anyone
else, you would be dead for this," he said, his lips pursed.

More tears spilled down her cheeks. "I was… Considering it…"

"Hmm… because you wanted to know what it was like," he mused.

"Y-Yeah…"

"And after still partially hating being touched by a witch, you were still going to open your
legs," he tsked and shook his head. "Shameful indeed."

"Gojo please stop… I'm sorry! I won't do it again!" She whined softly.

"If you wanted to be used so badly, you could have just asked me," he said, smirking. "Is that
why you're so angry? You want to be fucked~? I could fuck you, Utahime, if that's what you
want."

"No! S-Stop it!" She cried and covered her face with her hands.

He reached forward suddenly and snatched both of her wrists in his hand and pinned them to
the table. "Is that what you want, Utahime? Do you want me to fuck your manners back into
you?" He asked, grinning. "Do you want me to fill your pretty little mouth with my come?
Hmm~? I'll even make you swallow like a good little girl."
She looked away. "N-No! How could you say that?! T-That's taboo! It's forbidden!! Stop it!
Please!"

He felt a sudden stab of pain deep in his chest, it hurt like a bitch. He tasted iron, but he
ignored it.

He grabbed her face with his other hand and forced her to look at him. "But you wanna know
what it feels like~ you were going to do it anyway! I could do it right now if you want~! All
you have to do is ask."

"P-Please stop, Satoru…" she whispered softly.

He blinked once and finally realized just how many tears were soaking her face. Even his
hand was wet from the amount of tears pouring down her cheeks.

He inhaled sharply and let her go and she immediately hugged herself.

He sighed heavily and ran his hand through his hair. He hadn't intended to make her cry. He
didn't even plan on saying any of that. It just came out.

"I'm… sorry Utahime…" He sighed and rubbed his eyes. "I don't know where that came
from… I wouldn't hurt you like that…" he grimaced and rubbed his face again. What the fuck
is wrong with me? I'm losing my grip on things too easily lately…

She wiped her eyes on the sleeve of her sweater. "It's fine… I deserved it…"

He frowned and reached for her, intending to wipe her face, but she flinched away.

He froze and let his hand fall back to the table. Biting his cheek he erased the seal on the
table, releasing them from the invisible restraints.

He expected her to run away, but she stayed seated, so he tried to reach out to her again.

"I didn't mean to make you cry," he murmured and gently cupped her cheek. She tensed and
he bit his lip as he gently wiped her tears away with his thumb.

She didn't say anything, but she let him wipe her tears away without a fight.

"Did… Did the potion help at all?" She quietly asked as she stood up, her eyes downcast.

"It helped quite a lot actually…though I could probably use another cup..." he mumbled and
pressed hand against his chest. It still felt like he had a stab wound, or was it more of a burn?
Either way he was starting to feel lightheaded.

"I'll get you more," she said and grabbed his cup and quickly moved over to fill it up again.

The relief was immediate, and he slouched in the chair with a sigh when it faded back to a
dull pain in the background.

"Thank you," he said and smiled slightly, wanting to lighten the heavy atmosphere.
"But… you're not better?" She asked, frowning.

"Hm, I don't think so… I should probably see Shoko when we get to the capital, just in
case…" he said.

She nodded and changed into her cat form, but that only made it more obvious that she was
upset, because her ears were low against her head, and her tail was limp.

He tried to leave her be, he really did, but he couldn't stand seeing her look so small and sad.

With a deep breath, he leaned down and quickly scooped her up, and tucked her in tight
against his chest.

She yelped in surprise, but didn't struggle to leave like she has lately, so he kept her close.

He carried her over to the couch and sank down with a sigh. He gently petted her until she
started to purr, and after a few moments he tilted her face up and silently urged her to look at
him.

"You don't really hate this, do you?" He asked quietly.

"N-No… I don't," she whispered.

He smirked and gently rubbed the pad of his index finger against the bridge of her cute little
nose. "I knew it…"

She closed her eyes and hid her face from him.

He could tell she was embarrassed, felt the timid waver of her magic shake within her.

"Why are you so embarrassed? It's not like I'm going to tell anyone about this," he murmured
and gently scratched along her jaw and down her neck. "You can be my sweet little lapcat at
home and a mean angry bitch to everyone else," he mused.

"Don't say that…" she grumbled.

"Why not? I think I should. You've had it backwards lately. I don't want anyone else seeing
this side of you," he said and tightened his grip on her.

"I'm sorry…" she mumbled.

He laid down on his side and tucked her in close, and he smiled to himself when she didn't
attempt to escape like usual.

"Enough of that already… it's tiresome…" he said, sighing.

"I'm s—"

"Ah-ah, shhh," he murmured and hid his face in her fur.

He laid there in silence, focusing on her rapid little heartbeat, and her comforting little purrs
as he slowly dozed off, feeling at ease for the first time in days.

...

He woke up feeling surprisingly rested, he noticed there was a blanket tucked around him,
but Utahime was still purring in his arms, so it could only mean she left to grab a blanket and
returned to his side.

He smiled and snuggled in further into the warmth of her fur. He didn't want to get up. He'd
be perfectly content with staying here like this forever.

Unfortunately as soon as she noticed he was awake she squirmed out of his hold and jumped
on the floor.

She changed into her human form as soon as he sat up to grab her. He kept going with the
momentum. It happened quickly. A second later he had her in his arms, and he was face to
face with her bright red face looking into her pretty amber eyes.

"Ah! G-Gojo, what are—"

He cupped her face with his hand and pressed his thumb against her lips. "Shh, I'm thinking
we have a new rule, inside voices while inside. Or else we'll be forced to whisper for an
hour~" he said, smirking.

His smirk quickly grew to a grin when he realized that Utahime would always lose.

"You can break the charm by giving the one you were yelling at a kiss~" he added
mischievously.

Her eyes somehow widened further. "N-No don't do that!" She begged, muffled slightly as he
was still pressing his thumb against her lips.

"It's too late. It's done~," he said with a laugh.

She scowled and struggled in an attempt to get away, but he quickly moved over her before
tightening his grip on her face, pinning her to the couch.

Her heart rate spiked, along with a thick wave of fear that threw him off kilter. Did she think
he was going to hurt her?

Frowning, he let her go and leaned back. "Hey, you okay? Why are you so scared?"

"I'm not scared!"

His brows rose in surprise, but unfortunately couldn't hide his grin when she spoke next– in a
whisper.

"I'm just annoyed!"

"Mhm," he took a deep breath to school his grin down and cleared his throat. "You know I
wouldn't hurt you, right Utahime?"

"I know…" she growled and scrambled to her feet with a huff. "Shouldn't we be getting ready to go now?"

He stared at her for a few beats until she started to fidget and then stood and slowly leaned
down into her face. Once again her energy spiked with fear, though it was quickly muted, as
if she was trying to hide it.

"What are you so afraid of?" He asked, his concern growing. "Did someone hurt you? Is that
why you've been lashing out?"

Her eyes widened. "No!" then even quieter. "No . I just… I like my personal space…"

"Hmm, alright then… you do know if you need help, or if someone is giving you a hard time,
you can tell me. I'll make it right. I'll make them pay. I'll make them cry. Whether you're short
changed, stood up, or hurt, all appropriate bones will be broken," he said, serious and void of
his usual amusement.

She looked away and turned back to her cat form."Thank you for the reminder… but you don't need to go
that far… and can we get ready to leave already?"

"Hmm, 'suppose so, go on and pack up then, and could you rent us a horse when you're
done?"

"Okay," she said and scurried off.

He watched her energy through the walls as it spiked randomly while she rushed around her
room. She seemed so frazzled, and he felt a bit to blame over her unease.

He figured she was still upset with him over what he did in the kitchen, and he couldn't blame
her for that. Frustrated or not, he didn't want to purposely upset her like that again.

It was a complicated issue though. Because on one hand, forcing her to bend a little broke a
lot of the tension he'd been feeling lately.

And he didn't like seeing her cry, but he simultaneously liked the idea that she may finally
understand the grief she put him through lately.

It was a double edged sword.

Maybe he really should push Utahime around a bit, because as much as he didn't care for the
societal roles and standards regarding the place of familiars, putting Utahime in her place
seemed to have fixed the issue.
The only thing he had to figure out was whether or not that fix was an actual fix, or just a
sloppy patch.

He sighed and took his sunglasses off so he could rub his eyes. The way her energy seemed
to warble and spike had him thinking it was more of a patched fix.

And nothing short of perfection would be good enough for him. But this would have to do for
now at least…

Something one of his tutors said resurfaced suddenly and he grimaced because while he
hadn't before, it was starting to make sense.

True respect can only come from fear. This doesn't necessarily mean terror, but a healthy dose
of fear will keep even the most unruly soft and compliant.

Utahime walked back into the living room with her bag and frowned when she saw him
standing there.

"Why are you just standing there?"

"Why are you just standing there?" He said at the same time.

She frowned but didn't say anything more.

He stared at her until she started to fidget again before speaking. "Be a good girl and go pack
my stuff too," he said as calmly as he could, curious to see her reaction.

She always got so heated when he said things like that, but he was always teasing when he
said it. How would she react now? How would she react when he didn't even crack a simple
smile? Especially when the shadow of the morning still hung over them.

Just like he expected Utahime frowned. But she didn't say anything, that was unexpected. Her
cheeks flushed and her pretty little nose scrunched before she hung her head and silently went
to his room.

Not even a peep of protest? He wasn't used to that. He wasn't sure if he liked it.

He got himself something to eat while he mulled it over and when she returned with his bag
he held out a sandwich he made for her.
"Go rent us the horse now," he said as he analyzed her every movement.

This time her lip stuck out in a pout and she silently accepted the sandwich from him. Her
grip on it was tight enough to dent the bread, and he knew she wasn't pleased. But she just
nodded once and quietly went downstairs and out the building.

Satoru sighed heavily and rubbed his hands over his face. He definitely didn't like her
silence.

"Maybe I should wipe the last five years from both of our memories," he thought aloud. He
could do it easily too.

Then he could leave himself a note to be more observant so hopefully, he could catch the
exact moment things started crumbling.

And that was probably the worst part of being as strong as he was, because he honestly saw
no problem with that. If he did it to both of them, Utahime couldn't be mad, but he knew
she'd be upset should she ever find out somehow.

Maybe he should just ask her what she thought about the idea.

Yeah it was illegal, he knew that would be the first point she'd say, but who would know?

Losing five years wouldn't even be that much of a big deal in the grand scheme of things
because they could live for a long time. Five years was nothing compared to fragile humans.

While Utahime was gone Satoru snuck into her room to snoop through her stuff.

If things went the way he was dreading they would, Utahime wouldn't be coming home, so he
wanted to make sure she had all of her favorite things with her…

He dug through her closet, looking for the things that had a lot of her magic energy clinging
to it, knowing it meant she wore or used the item a lot.

He grabbed a few dresses and various stockings, but when he opened up the drawer with the
strongest residuals, he froze.

Is that my shirt?
Curious, he took one out and held it up. It was a light blue tunic he tossed when he was a
teenager because it didn't fit him. This one had been one of his favorites. He used to wear it
all the time until his growth spurt.

He liked it because the color went well with his eyes, and it was quite comfy.

He set it aside and pulled out the next shirt, which was also his at one point. This one was a
black dress shirt that he wore once to a ball when he was sixteen. He'd thrown this one out
the window at the end of the night as he'd been frustrated by being paraded around like he
was some kind of rare specimen.

The next shirt was newer, one he got a few months ago and simply decided he just didn't
want it anymore. It was a plain white tunic with long loose sleeves, it was soft to the touch
and ever so slightly see through.

"Does she wear these?" He whispered to himself, confused.

Why?

It didn't bother him so much as worry him. When they lived in the castle she was only given
two outfits. One day dress, and one night dress. As a familiar, she just wasn't given the same
privileges as humans or witches. It wasn't seen as a necessity to give familiars clothing,
because many times, they never revealed their human forms.

The moment he learned that Utahime actually had a human form when he was a kid he filled
his closet with dresses for her to choose from.

He even designated half of his dresser to stuff he acquired for her. Most of the time he traded
his spells with the scullery maids in exchange for them to make clothes for Utahime. He
wasn't allowed a salary, so he often went about unconventional methods of getting things.

Had it not been enough?

He knew the clothes she had back then weren't very comfortable, and his things were always
a higher quality, so it made sense if she wanted to sleep in his clothes.

But that was over six years ago.

He pretty much spoiled her now— tried to but she often fought him when he wanted to buy
expensive things for her…

It just didn't make sense for her to have these. He could see himself grabbing them and
teasing her with them, cracking a few jokes to get on her nerves— but he didn't. He didn't
because he knew her anger would be real. He didn't because he knew they were balancing on
an awkward tightrope right now and he didn't want to push her away.

He sighed and packed the shirts up for her. It seemed like there was a lot he messed up
without even knowing. Maybe he'd spoil her one last time when they got to the capital, even
if she said no.

It could be his parting gift to her.

And if he was lucky and they both returned home, he'd spoil her again.

He packed away a few trinkets, jewelry, her pillow, makeup, and her favorite books before
compressing everything into a small box that fit in his pocket.

He heard the door open downstairs, and he quietly left her room to meet her.

"Did you find one?" He asked curiously.

Utahime nodded and gestured out the window. "Yes."

Satoru glanced over her shoulder and smirked when he saw the large white stallion waiting
outside.

"Ha, there's no way that was the only one," he said with a laugh.

She crossed her arms. "It was the only one that could carry your ridiculous weight for so long without risking harm to
the poor animal!"

He grinned and slipped outside to inspect the large horse. "Geeze, Utahime, gonna have me
looking like prince charming returning home from a crusade!"

She scoffed behind him. "Like I said, I was worried the other horses would get hurt…" her
voice went back to normal now that she was out of the shop.

"Oh come on, I'm not that heavy!" He complained.

"You're the size of a tree!"

"Am not!"

She held her hand up to him. "Just look at how freakishly huge your hand is compared to
mine!"

Satoru turned to her and pressed his palm against hers. The difference was stark.

He could bend his fingers over the tips of hers…

So small…

He glanced at her face and frowned because her cheeks were pink.

"You know, if you're cold, you can sit in my jacket," he said and unbuttoned his coat a bit so
she could hide away if she wanted. She used to do it all the time when he was a teenager, so
why not now?
She frowned and snatched her hand away from his as if he burned her. "I'm fine! I'll sit on the
bags," she grumbled and transformed into a cat and jumped up on one of their bags.

Satoru sighed and snuck the small storage box in her bag before lifting it, and her up to attach
it to the horse's saddle. Once everything was secured he turned around to seal the shop to
keep it safe from squatters and thieves and pulled himself up onto the horse.

Watching the seaside town grow smaller and smaller as they went made him feel pretty
gloomy. It was the town they called home for a little more than half a decade.

And even though he was really hoping they'd both return to it, he had a feeling he'd be
coming back alone.

It would take a week to get to the capital, surely if anything was going to change between
them, being stuck on the road together for seven days and nights would either make or break
them.

"I should have studied teleportation more," he sighed once the town was no longer visible
behind them. He could only safely manage small distances at the moment.

Teleporting inanimate objects was far easier and took little effort, teleporting the living was
far more strenuous.

Living things had blood, bones and veins and all that good stuff that had to be teleported
together– in one piece. He learned that the hard way, the first time he teleported a live
chicken without a proper magic circle, all he summoned were its bones…

He'd laughed when the skeleton popped in front of him, but his amusement quickly died
when Utahime screeched.

It isn't funny! That can happen to you, idiot!!

He could do it now, but he couldn't manage more than a block of distance before it got risky.

"Well… we can always practice when we get back," she mumbled.

"True…" he tried not to let it, but hearing her say that got his hopes up.

"Did you tell them you were coming?" Utahime asked after a bit.

"Oh, no, I didn't think I needed to," Satoru said with a shrug. "They're lucky I'm going at all."

"Don't you think it would have been a good idea? They might think you're hiding from them,
and I don't want them to try to charge you with anything."
"Utahime, are you forgetting that I never answer their stupid letters? This is… a special
situation," he explained. "Besides, they can charge me with all they want, they won't dare to
actually enforce any kind of punishment on me," he said.

"I'm not . This is the first time we're away from home, and even if you ignored their letters,
they still sent men to the shop to deliver messages in the past, so if they send someone and
see you're not there, it might lead to an issue."

He shrugged. "I'm not worried, so you shouldn't be either."

"That's precisely why I should worry, Gojo. You always disregard the important things, I
swear I'm going to go gray because of how much you stress me out," she grumbled.

"Well, I think you'll look good with silver hair," he said and turned around to poke her. "It's a
good look."

She batted his finger away. "No. It's a bad look."

"You don't mean that."

"I do."

He pouted at her. "You sayin' you don't think I'm purrtty, Hime?" He teased as he poked her
again.

She batted at him again. "No! Idiot! I don't—"

He picked her up and held her close to his face. "Liar."

She squeaked and struggled in his grip. "W-Why does it matter?!"

He gently tapped her nose. "It matters 'cause you're hurting my fee-fees, Hime~ Can't you tell
how devastated I am?"

She twisted out of his grip and landed on his thigh. She dug her claws into him. He winced.

" Ugh , what do you want me to say?" She grumbled.

"That you think I'm pretty~" he said without thinking.

Even in her cat form he could tell she scrunched up her nose in displeasure. "You know you
are…" she mumbled.

"Mhm, but do you think so?"

"Again, why does it matter what I say?" She grumbled.

"'Cause believe it or not your opinion is very important to me, Utahime. I'm not a people
pleaser at all, but lately I'm thinking I'm quite an adamant Hime-pleaser~" he only half
heartedly teased, because there was a lot of truth to that, and he willed her to understand how
serious he was.

She made that cute scrunchy face again. "Don't say such things, Gojo!"

"Why?"

She grumbled and took a deep breath before sighing in defeat. "Fine. I do in fact think you're
purrtty ~" she said, and actually purred out the word pretty. "Happy?!"

He was not expecting her to actually say that and his mind went blank, and he just stared at
her while literally nothing went through his head.

"What?!" She squeaked.

"You literally asked me to do that!?"

Damn did he?

"Stop acting so shocked!"

….?

It was no secret that Satoru got away with quite a lot over the years by simply flashing a
charming smile, or fluttering his eyes at anybody who looked his way.

Many whispered about how alluring the boy with silver hair and piercing blue eyes was, and
over the years, such comments easily got to his head and inflated his already huge ego.

The only one who was never phased by his charms was Utahime. Leave it to her to always
burst his bubble, to always drag him back to earth.

So hearing her say that– even at his apparent request– threw him off.

"Eh…" he nodded dumbly and slowly turned his attention back to the road ahead.

He felt awkward and out of place, and no matter how much he tried to ignore it he couldn't
really settle down.

Utahime huffed and moved back to curl up on the bag, and an awkward silence settled
between them. After a few minutes, he was unable to help it any longer, and Satoru finally
blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

"For what it's worth, I think you're pretty too, Utahime, you—"
"Don't say that!" She snapped suddenly, and jumped up to her feet.

"Erm, why not? You are," he said, frowning. "And you'll look great with gray or silver hair."

"No, stop, shut up!" She groaned and fixed him with a sharp glare. "I'd look like an old
crone."

He scoffed. Crone? So what did that make him? "No you wouldn't! And I'm just
complimenting you! Don't women like compliments?" He asked, confused.

"Only if the compliments are honest! I'm short, untalented and plain, and I accepted that a
long time ago. I don't need anyone lying to me just to make me feel better, especially you."

"What?! That's ridiculous. I am being honest! How can you not tell?"

"I can tell, it's what you do, Gojo, whether you realize it or not. You're a damned flirt! You
tell poor girls things like that all the time, then you wonder why they keep coming to the shop
and don't buy anything!" Utahime yelled.

He frowned. He had no idea what she was talking about. "Are you talking about when I told
that redhead that I liked her hair? I didn't know that it counted as flirting."

She groaned. "It's the way you said it!"

"What do you mean? All I said was– I like your hair – how would she get the wrong idea
from something so normal?"

"Forget it, Gojo, you once again have no idea what I'm saying," she complained.

He felt like she was damning him for things he didn't do or couldn't help. It made him feel a
bit helpless because all he really wanted was for things between them to go back to
normal…

Back to how it felt when he first bought the land for his shop.

They were so in sync back then, it seemed crazy looking back on it.

They didn't even have to physically talk to know what the other was thinking– she read his
mind without actually doing so— and vice versa.

If they were at the market and he saw someone that looked hilarious, all he had to do was
glance at her and he could feel her struggling not to laugh.

He knew where she was all the time back then, always keenly aware of her presence without
needing additional spells. He had always assumed she could tell the same for him.

She could be on the other side of town, and it would feel like he was there with her. He would
know if she needed him.
If she was having a bad day, he knew exactly what to do to lift her spirits. They never argued
over what to have for any meal because they were always on the same wavelength.

They had truly been like how society claimed a witch and their familiar ought to be— best
friends, two parts of a whole, one being, one soul.

When did that change?

Thinking about it was actually really upsetting.

He bit his lip and glanced at her balled up form

He wanted to press her for more information, but he had this weird feeling that it wouldn't be
a good idea.

Still, he was mostly bothered by the fact that she couldn't tell he was being honest which
meant she was blocking him out again.

Utahime was objectively very pretty.

She had long dark hair and pretty doe eyes the color of honey. Her face was round,
symmetrical, flawless, and she had an appealing figure.

It wasn't hard to see why guys were drawn to her human form.

Even in her cat form she stood out, what with how small and innocent she seemed. Even her
fur was sleek and incredibly soft.

Utahime was a beauty— objectively.

Swallowing his words, he reached over and gently petted her face and neck.

It was going to be a long week.

 Chapter 6
Chapter Notes

😅
This chapter was double the length and I decided to split it in half because this half is
already 7k+

Since it's already written I'll probably upload it sooner after I read through it once more
just to make sure it's good.

The first two days of their trip felt like it took ages.

Utahime barely talked at all, and Satoru was dreadfully bored. The entire first day he
somehow managed to leave her alone, told himself he'd wait for her to start a conversation,
but she never did.

Yeah it was peaceful, but Satoru really hated the silence.

The sun hadn't even set on the second day when he finally lost his composure.

Utahime was in the middle of turning around on the blanket he gave her– likely finding a
spot to curl up for the night– when Satoru suddenly scooped her up and carried her off.

Utahime yelped when he lifted her off the ground and immediately struggled in his hold.
"Ah! What are you doing?!"

"I'm bored!" He complained as he squished her against his chest.

"Ugh, so? What do you want me to do about it?"

"Oh! I don't know, maybe you could, I dunno, talk to me!?" He said and finally restrained her
enough to stop her struggles.

"Oof, about what? There's nothing to talk about out here," Utahime complained. "Besides it's
getting late, you should just go to sleep."

"I'm not tired, if we didn't need to let the horse rest we'd be on the road still," he grumbled.

She sighed and stopped struggling, but didn't attempt to start a conversation. She just sat in
his arms like a silent wet blanket...

He was at his wits end. He was so frustrated he wanted to shout.

He used to like the silence between them, it was once so cozy and warm, comforting, but
over the last few weeks it was tense. That tension chipped away at his psyche. He felt like a
child complaining about wanting attention, but she wasn't giving him anything.

Frowning, he carefully set her down and watched as she silently went back to her blanket to
curl up.

He was far too wired to relax right now, his energy was shaking in the air, twisting like a
storm. He didn't typically get this restless, and thinking about it only made it worse.

He stood there feeling entirely out of place before pursuing his lips and walking away. He'd
go for a walk to burn some steam, and hopefully, he'd be tired enough to at least lay down
until morning…

He grabbed a few leaves off some bushes as he walked and suspended them in the air
between his hands. He focused his magic on them, slowly manipulating the leaves to take
different forms. Maple turned into oak, then willow, then to ginkgo.

He glanced up at the trees surrounding him. He could probably change an entire tree, maybe
enchant one to bear fruit it naturally didn't…

That was a harmless experiment, wasn't it? He'd always wondered about being able to do it,
but never actually attempted it. It was another illegal magic, altering nature, or more
specifically, the living, and Utahime was always so adamant about rules…

If she caught him she'd be upset, and it might cause an argument. He was so tired of arguing
with her.

She's asleep anyway…

Satoru dropped the leaves he was messing with and placed his hand against the nearest tree,
an enormous oak. All the trees around him were pretty large, but this one felt larger than the
others nearby based on the energy flowing through it.

He would need a magic circle to start the spell properly, but that was always so slow. He
needed to figure out how to channel his magic properly, quickly, without Utahime… Just in
case.

Because if he couldn't figure it out, and he ended up parting ways with her, any sorcerer
worth their salt would be able to get the upper hand on him simply because he'd be too slow
to properly retaliate.

He could still cast charms and various incantations, but the spells that made him the
strongest, needed a catalyst… they needed Utahime… he needed Utahime…

Sighing, Satoru closed his eyes to try to better his focus, but it was difficult. It was still taking
too long…

He exhaled slowly, trying to steady the flow of his magic, but it was just too erratic and
aimless. It was like trying to force a boiling pot of water to only produce one bubble at a
time.

The tree groaned under the pressure he was putting it through, but it didn't budge like he
wanted.

He felt a warm, familiar presence envelope him so suddenly it startled him. He stumbled
back from the tree in surprise only to watch, stunned as Utahime grabbed his wrist and
gently, but firmly pulled him down to his knees, pressing his palm against the earth and dewy
grass.

Her magic enveloped his own, small tendrils of it tugged it into focus, quickly taming it.

He was too surprised to hear the spell she whispered before a second later the forest floor
around them suddenly bloomed with numerous wildflowers as far as he could see in the
darkening night, expending the magic he'd built up.

The flowers even shot up the trunks of all the trees around them, making the forest look more
like a scene from one of her favorite books.

As soon as she let him go, she cut the connection where their magic was beginning to merge
together. A rush of cold swept through his bones so suddenly he shuddered, and he grabbed
her wrist without thinking.

"Don't do that," he said, a little disoriented by both the sudden drop of his magic energy and
the uncomfortable chill.

That chill... he finally figured out what it was, the chill he swore he'd been feeling for years
now, but could never really place, the one he convinced himself had existed only in his
head, the one that slowly got worse.

"Don't do what?" Utahime asked as she attempted to tug her wrist away from him. "I should
be saying that to you, what were you up to? Why can't you just go to sleep?"

He yanked her down to her knees and looked her in the eyes. "Don't block me… you're
blocking me out… even when you say you aren't—" he tried to search for the familiar
warmth of her magic, that same warmth that he felt in that moment she used that spell, but he
couldn't. Whatever he felt were only residuals, it didn't hold a candle to her true energy.
Damn, he had forgotten what it felt like.

It was a little intoxicating...

He knew it was different, and he felt insane trying to pinpoint exactly when it started feeling
off.

"Gojo, you're just tired—"

"No," he scowled and tightened his grip on her. "I was starting to wonder if I was just
remembering it wrong… but I know — doesn't it bother you, Hime? Can't you tell?"
She took a deep breath and gently placed her hand over the one he had around her wrist.
"I'm… don't know what—"

"You do, you know, I know that you know— you're lying," he cut in quickly.

She bit her lip and gently tried to pry his fingers off her wrist. "I… I am happier like this…"

"What?" He asked in disbelief. He didn't think he heard her right, he couldn't have heard her
right. Why would she say that?

She shifted a bit and attempted to tug his hand off her wrist again. "Don't you think it's…
erm, better? I-I mean— if— it's better that I'm my own person, right?"

He could barely wrap his head around what she was saying. "What? You are your own
person, why wouldn't you be?"

"But… I'm not… not really… I-I'm your shadow, Gojo…" she mumbled.

"And… you don't want to be?" He asked slowly, still in disbelief. He was starting to feel ill
again. That strange pain that had been plaguing him returned with a sharp vengeance deep in
his gut.

"I— it's just better like this… it's better if there's a separation between us, Our magic was... it
was getting too jumbled..." she insisted quietly.

"What? Why? That doesn't make any sense! That's the point! Having a permanent barrier is
the exact opposite of your purpose!" He said.

Utahime frowned and finally yanked her hand out of his grip. "Oh, wow, really, Gojo? My
purpose? You can't even pretend like I'm not just an object to—"

He grabbed her face and forced her to look at him. "No. Don't do that. You know what I
meant— you should know," he tightened his grip on her. "You would have known if you
weren't blocking me all the time," he shook her face a little. "Dismiss it, now."

She frowned. "Gojo…"

"Dismiss the barrier, or I'll do it for you."

Her lip trembled and that fear that he felt when he confronted her in the kitchen resurfaced.
The exact fear he didn't want to make her feel again.

Frowning he let her go and stood up. "Forget it… let's just forget about this," he sighed.

It was clear to him now that Utahime was afraid of him in some way. She claimed she wasn't,
but her reaction just now made it obvious.

He thought back to the feeling that rushed through him when she interrupted him. That
feeling, he swore that was what they used to be. But he'd been too stunned to fully process it.
That was what he used to be, what they used to be.
He was so close to forcing her to drop whatever barrier she'd put up.

It angered him, frustrated him, confused him.

He tried to make sense of her reasoning, but it just didn't make any sense!

Utahime was her own person, at least to him. He has never thought of her as less than. But
she said she was happier this way, with this cold barrier between them.

How had he not noticed she had put it up in the first place? The only way that made sense
was that it had to have been gradual.

How many years had she been slowly pushing him away?

Did that mean she didn't like how close they once were? Had her happiness back then
actually just been his own projected onto her? Had he been controlling her without realizing?
That made him feel a little sick.

What if the Utahime from his memories was just a result of his own influence on her?
Leaving the castle had probably given her the courage to try to withdraw herself from him,
and she'd done it so well that he didn't even notice.

But she said she still cares about me… I know she hadn't been lying… she said she still
considers me her friend…

She still considered him a friend, yet she'd been withdrawing herself from him for years. She
was unhappy to be considered his shadow — she was unhappy being his familiar.

Maybe she was still confused on exactly what she wanted, maybe she thought she wanted to
stay because she knew suggesting otherwise was a great offense.

It was clear as day to him now.

There was only one sensible option.

The next few days passed smooth enough. Whatever conversation they had was a little more
awkward and a little more strained each time.
He unintentionally started making comments to push her buttons, and he'd watch her fuse
burst each time like he was watching the scene through a window.

He was little more detached each time, and a little more distant.

He was a little meaner everytime, and her fuse broke a little sooner each time too.

By the time Satoru could see the castle on the horizon, the tension between Utahime and him
was just about ready to snap.

Every time he spoke to her for more than a few minutes they always ended up arguing about
something stupid.

He had a constant migraine from all her yelling, and that only shoved his mood further in the
dirt.

He felt bad for the damn horse!

Utahime was impossible to read now, she felt like a stranger. If he teased her she ignored
him, if he was nice to her she got annoyed because she thought he was faking it, if he was
mean it just made her blow up.

The only thing that gave him peace was silence.

And he really hated silence.

And even though he tried to keep his big mouth shut, he'd say something eventually, and it
was like a game of roulette on whether or not she'd get pissed at him.

They were resting by a river, fresh out of another argument that he couldn't even remember
the start of.

Utahime was in her human form, walking along the riverbank barefoot. Her dress was
blowing softly in the wind, and her lips were stuck in a firm frown. Probably thinking about
the last stupid thing he said, he almost wanted to ask her what it had been…
"I'm understanding why some people frown upon men having females as familiars," he
grumbled because apparently he really couldn't keep his fucking mouth shut.

She glared at him. "Excuse me? What is that supposed to mean?"

"All I'm saying is I can understand," he said, shrugging.

"You do realize that's because men can't keep their hands to themselves?! Because female
familiars are seen as lesser than their male counterparts!?" She yelled and marched right up to
him and jabbed her finger into his chest.

He rolled his eyes and brushed her hand away. "Please, I'm she you'd have been a lot happier
if I treated you like everyone else did!"

Her face flushed red. "I would not! Have you not been listening? I—"

"You fantasize about being used, yeah I've been listening," he said, smirking.

The anger in her eyes flashed even brighter, "I never said that!"

He shrugged. "You might as well have."

"I already apologized! You don't need to bring it up again!"

"Mh, but sorry doesn't really fix anything, does it?"

"W-Wha? You're really holding a grudge against me? You already humiliated me enough, I-I
apologized! I admitted to something that ashamed me! You don't need to throw it in my face
again!" She yelled angrily.

"It's not a grudge, that's your thing— I just don't know if I really believe you've learned your
lesson is all—" He stepped forward and tilted her face up so he could look at her angry face
better. "I mean, we'll be in the capital soon, the place is practically crawling with sorcerers,
how do I know you're not going to run off with one of them and—"

Utahime grit her teeth and slapped his hand away. She got him good enough for the blow to
sting.

Satoru tsked and grabbed her face anyway. "We have to do something about that too, I can't
have you disrespecting me like that so freely in front of everyone. Can you imagine what
anyone else would do to you for such disrespect?"

He squeezed her face until she winced.

"How would you like it if I raised my hand against you as much as you do to me, hm?" He
asked as he got in her face.

Her eyes widened, but she refused to back down, stubborn as she was. "You're right, why
don't you get me back?" She growled and shoved him away. "You want to hit me, Gojo?!"
She shoved him again but he didn't budge. "You gonna hit a girl?!"
He scowled. "Coulda fooled me, Utahime, what with how you act I was starting to think you
were a man! I've never raised my hand against you, you know, but maybe I should."

She shoved him again. "Fuck you! What are you waiting for then?! Go on and hit the girl
that's half your fucking size! Real manly of you! I'm sure you'll be proud of yourself!"

"Stop pushing me! Or I'll trap you in a fucking box!"

"Do it!"

"You're being a bitch!"

"You're an asshole!"

"What the fuck?! I literally didn't do anything!"

She growled and snatched up a rock from the ground and hurled it at him. He dodged it, and
threw up his infinity to block the second one. It shattered on impact, throwing little pieces all
around them.

Utahime was hysterical at this point, and she was punching his chest, arms, wherever she
reached first. It was affecting him, it was making him crazy.

"What are you waiting for huh? Master? You gonna slap me across the face? Gonna teach me
a lesson? No one's gonna bat an eye if we walk into town and I have blood all over my face!
Or maybe a black eye or a broken arm? Go ahead! My kind is already treated like property!"

Satoru scowled and pinned her arms to her side and effortlessly lifted her up. She had just
enough time to gasp before he roughly shoved her against a nearby tree right at his eye level
so hard she whimpered.

"I'm the only one here that has ever been treated like fucking property!" He yelled back,
frustrated, offended… upset.

Her eyes widened and all of the fight immediately drained from her body, and she withered
like a flower.

He stared into her large amber eyes while he caught his breath, while his heart raced, while
the words he was trying to find next jumbled around in the chaos of his thoughts.

He couldn't think straight, he felt like he was under water. His head hurt too much.

He subconsciously tightened his grip on her. Her heart was racing just as fast as his was.

He realized a beat later that he had his hand pressed firmly against her chest, being the only
thing keeping her pinned against the tree.

Frowning, he slid his hand to her waist and grabbed her with both hands so he could carefully
put her down.
...

It was effortless...

He realized he could hear her talking, stammering out apologies, but she sounded far away.

"I-I'm sorry, Satoru…" Utahime whispered, trembling. "I… I don't know… you're right—"

He didn't let her go yet.

His fingers were almost touching as they circled her waist.

...Uh...

The thoughts that quickly followed made him feel a little insane.

It was a jumbled mess of the negative emotions from their argument just now, and their
argument in the kitchen a week ago, specifically what he said— what he offered... what she
wanted...

If she asked him to...

"—I was being a bitch— I don't know what is wrong with me… I-I'm so sorry…"

No, no, no...

He let her go and slowly walked away.

She tried to grab his hand and he pulled away from her. Unable to look at her anymore he
silently walked back to the horse. For the first time in her presence, he intentionally put his
barrier up to its full capacity.

No, you wouldn't do that. He kept repeating to himself like a mantra.

His head was still hurting like hell.

The offense he felt just moments prior was still lingering, but it was mixed in with a bunch of
whispers of Utahime asking him for things that she definitely would never ask for.

I just want to know what it feels like... her voice was like honey....

...

Fucking hell...

...

He tried to just focus on his initial offense, but he couldn't even fully blame her for her
comments because he'd started it.

It was like sticking his hand in a fire and being surprised that he got burned.
Still…

It was like she forgot she'd always been free. He had made it clear to her when they were still
kids that she didn't have to stay with him if she didn't want to. He didn't know how at the
time, but he'd promised her he'd find a way to make it safe for her to go if she wanted to
leave.

But she'd promised that she was happy at his side and that she'd never want to leave him…

It was a childish promise, one a child of ten years couldn't really comprehend, he knew that…
But he still felt a bit bitter over how obvious it was that she no longer held that sentiment…

Didn't she know how valuable she was to him? How much she meant to him?

The more he thought about it the more he was beginning to realize he really would do
anything for her.

Anything...

That was a little dangerous.

Still a bit wired, he encased himself behind infinity and pulled it in close so that even if she
were to jump on his shoulder, she wouldn't be able to feel anything, not his magic energy, not
his emotions, not even his body heat, nothing.

He was feeling ill again, his head hurt so much, and the pain he'd been feeling over the past
few weeks now felt like he had a knife jammed in his lung.

He was in fucking pain, but he had no injury to show for it, and no explanation that made
sense to him.

He didn't want to think about it.

"G-Gojo, please… I—"

He led the horse back to the path and got on it, not even bothering to look to see if Utahime
followed suit. He knew she had, even if she didn't want to, she'd have no choice. Even if the
link was thin, she was still forced to stay within a certain range to him.
He knew she jumped back on the bags, he felt her presence, but he still didn't want to look at
her because he didn't trust himself not to say or do something really dangerous.

"I-I'm really sorry, Gojo…" she whispered from somewhere behind him.

Even though he ignored her, the soft tremble in her voice got past his barrier anyway. It was
habit, it had to be, why else would he reach over to lift her up on his shoulder?

It was an instinct, why else would he let his infinity fade away when she wrapped around him
as a scarf? He buried his face in the soft fabric, once again surprised that she didn't lash out,
and simultaneously wishing she had. He wanted her to give him a reason to hate her as much
as she obviously hated him…

Because even though he was still hurt, he couldn't be mad at her because he knew if he had
just kept his mouth shut in the first place, he wouldn't be feeling so shitty right now.

He could feel her reaching out to him through their frayed link, a first in a long time, but he
kept that part of him hidden. If she was going to block him out, it only made sense for him to
do it too, even if it felt wrong.

There wasn't really any point in trying to understand why anymore.

They were at the end of the road.

Plus he was still spirling down a dangerous train of thought that he didn't want her to catch
wind of...

They still hadn't spoken when they got to the city proper, and only when he dismounted the
horse did he finally say something.

A low, "Thanks," was mumbled to the stable boy that led the horse away, and then he fell
silent again.

It was odd, watching the castle ground pass by him again. He didn't think he'd ever come
back here, and was actually shocked that he was listening to the servants that led him away.

Normally he wouldn't have been so cooperative, but he knew it bothered Utahime whenever
he caused a scene, and he no longer had the energy to withstand her anger.

So he was patient when he was told to wait in a drawing room. He was cooperative when
some low ranked sorcerers were told to search him, and he was quiet when some older
sorcerers that had lost to him seven years ago muttered insults under their breath.
He could see himself laughing at them, taunting them, and berating them for their weakness,
but he didn't actually do it. He would have, but he didn't.

He wondered if it had anything to do with the infinity he'd cast around himself, this time
internally, to keep the other sorcerers from attempting to scan him. To keep his thoughts
protected from potential readers, and most importantly, to keep Utahime out…

Satoru felt like he was watching himself as he followed some knights to a room, he even
laughed at a joke one of them made, though as soon as it was made he forgot the punchline.

He nodded along to the instructions they gave him, and held a scroll out to him that he
actually grabbed.

He retreated into the room when they left, walking over their bags that had already been
moved inside. He set the scroll down on the writing desk in the corner then kicked his boots
off before letting himself fall face first on the bed and drifting to sleep.

"Aren't these paintings soo beautiful, Gojo?" Utahime whispered from her place tucked into
his coat, her little cat ears brushing against his chin. "It's hard to imagine that places like
this really exist out there."

Satoru absently rubbed his cheek against the top of her head. "Mh, yeah I guess it is pretty…"
he whispered, not too interested anymore as this was probably the twentieth landscape
painting they'd looked at today.

A new tutor was in charge of watching him today, and he had taken the two of them to an art
show titled "Places From Afar". Not what he would have picked for what was supposably a
fun day. What ten year old liked looking at paintings?

He smiled to himself and rolled his eyes. We'll, Utahime did, because of course she did.

All the paintings were made by a supposably world renowned painter that traveled even to
other kingdoms. Each piece depicted scenes the painter had witnessed with his own two eyes,
and had immortalized the scenes on canvas.

"Too bad we'll never get to see them in real life," Utahime whispered, her ears wilting sadly
against her head.

Her sadness seeped into his own being, and Satoru suddenly felt his eyes burn with her
emotions. Frowning, he nuzzled his face further into her fur.

"Don't be sad, Uta… you can see them yourself whenever you want," he whispered and
shuffled over to a less crowded spot of the gallery.

"We can't though, we're stuck here," she whispered sadly.

He tilted her little face up just enough for him to look into her large amber eyes. "No, Uta,
you're not stuck here. You don't belong to anyone, you can go wherever you want," he
murmured and gently poked her nose. "You can go see the fancy mountains and glowing sea
anytime, then if you want… you can come back to me and tell me if it's real."

"What do you mean? I belong to you, don't I? That's what teacher says…" Utahime
whispered.

He frowned and wrapped his arms around himself so he could hug her close. "No, you
don't… we're friends, Uta… so if you want to go and see the paintings in real life, I think you
should… just promise not to forget me…" He said and smiled as best he could, but thinking
about her leaving him behind made him upset.

He imagined himself all alone in his room without her and he bit his lip. He didn't want her
to go, but if she wanted to leave, he wouldn't stop her. It still made him really sad though…

He nearly cried— would have if Utahime hadn't quickly leaned up and rubbed her cheek
against his. An additional soothing wave of warmth melted into him through their bond and
he smiled.

She made him so happy….

"I wouldn't leave you behind, Gojo… we're together forever! Maybe someday we'll really get
to see the paintings in real life… but until then, I'm more than happy looking at these
paintings with you," she said.

His smile widened and he hugged her tighter. "Yeah, together forever."

Satoru felt like himself again when he woke up, but he wasn't really sure if he liked this
better than the odd complaint haze he'd been in when he first got to the castle.

He knew he should probably stay put until a servant was sent to collect him, but since he was
aware now, he did what he normally would have– whatever he wanted.

Utahime was curled up in a ball by the window, and she stood up when he pulled his boots
back on.

"Stay here," he said, avoiding her gaze by focusing on his boots.

He quickly left the room right when she took a breath to speak, and maybe he slammed the
door in her face on purpose, but he was still in a bad mood.
He half expected her to disobey like she always did lately and follow him, but she didn't.

Satoru rushed straight to the medical ward, ignoring the curious looks of the maids that he
brushed past in his haste.

Originally, he planned on putting this off until the very last minute, hopeful that Utahime
would give him a reason to believe that it wasn't truly over for them. Unfortunately, the trip
only proved to him that it really was over.

If he wanted to be able to still call her friend, then he had to break this miserable bond off
now. Lest their next argument destroy the shreds that were left.

"Shoko!" He called out as he burst through the doors of the medical ward. He scanned the
room as soon as he entered, locking on to the familiar small pool of magical energy in the
corner.

"Gojo?! What the— You scared the shit out of me!" The brunette woman laughed, the
cigarette she was fumbling with falling to the floor.

Satoru would have made some kind of comment about her smoking, but he was too anxious.
Instead he snatched the cigarette off the floor and popped it in her mouth, lighting it in the
process with a simple flick of his fingers.

"I need your help," he said as he stepped away.

Shoko's eyes widened and she glanced across the room where he'd been just a second ago.
"Long time no see, Is everything alright?"

"I'm going to sever my bond with Utahime, and I want you to take her instead," he said, his
words rushed, and heavy.

The cigarette fell from her mouth and he caught it and pushed it back in. "What!?"

"Please? You're the only one I trust with her, and—"

"Whoa, wait, what is going on? Where is she? Is she okay? Why do you look so terrible?"
Shoko asked.

He began to pace. "I'm fine, tired— I've just been on the road for a week. Utahime is in the
room I'm staying in, she's fine, this needs to be done, it has to be you, I don't trust anyone else
with her.

"I'll do whatever you want in exchange, anything but pay you, I'm sorry, but I refuse to get
money involved in this— this isn't a transaction— I can make you any potion you want or get
you some rare materials or—"

Shoko cut him off. "Wait, slow down, Gojo, please, I have a hangover," she grumbled and
took a deep breath, her cigarette smoke billowing out around her in a cloud. "To my office,"
she said and got up to move to the room at the end of the space.

Satoru followed her and sat in the chair across from her desk. It was a cluttered office, the
chair a tad too small for him, so he stretched his legs out in an attempt to get comfortable.

Shoko moved some paperwork out of the way and set a jar that was covered in dust in front
of him. Curious, he peered inside and snorted. It was candy, but it looked melted together, a
mass of sugary pink mess.

Shoko merely smiled and nudged it closer to him. "Sugar doesn't go bad, Gojo, just do your
woowoo on it, and it'll be good as new."

He smirked and sighed heavily. He missed her more than he realized. Shoko was his
classmate growing up. She was a witch born to human parents, her magical abilities having
surfaced after a freak accident that almost killed her. She'd been hit by a carriage, the horse
having trampled her to a point where no one thought she'd live.

She survived because she managed to heal her own wounds, and that miracle quickly caught
the attention of The Crown who gladly sponsored her training. However, she only really
excelled at healing, anything else she didn't seem to want to try, not even simple
enchantments.

"You still have this nasty jar?" He asked as he picked it up. The candy inside was his favorite
flavor– well one of them, a sour strawberry.

"Hey, I recall that being one of your favorites, you're lucky I kept it for ya," she motioned at
him. "Go on, do the thing."

He shook the jar, infusing his magic into it. The contents broke down and quickly reformed
into perfect little star cutouts. He set the jar down with a triumphant smirk, adding a little pop
of glitter for the hell of it.

Shoko laughed and rolled her eyes. "As shocking as it sounds, I was hoping you'd make a
show of it, no one else around this stuffy castle makes magic feel– well, magical ," she said
and stole a piece from the jar before making a face. "Ugh, I forgot how sour they are."

He smiled absently and cleaned the jar off on his sleeve. It was a habit he started as a kid,
making things more than they were. Magic should be magical, he decided that after having a
long discussion with a few human children when he was seven years old.

He and Utahime had been partners for two years at that point, and they had snuck out of the
castle to play in the city.

The kids they used to play with were street rats, and they had been very disappointed when
he showed them a simple color change spell, declaring it looked boring. So after much
deliberation they decided it needed a bit of sparkle and light, and he experimented with the
effect ever since.

Satoru popped two candies in his mouth, the sourness enough to hurt his jaw. "You got these
to prank me, remember? I shoved a handful in my mouth at once!"

She smirked. "Admit it was hilarious, you spit 'em out and nearly cried!"

"Yeah, yeah, you're just mad I took a liking to them."

Shoko shook her head and set the jar back in its spot on her desk, then took a deep breath.
"Okay, back to business… Why do you want to break your bond with Utahime?"

He sobered quickly and crossed his arms. "I don't want to, but she's not happy with me
anymore… I don't really know why, I don't think I've changed too much… but she clearly
would rather be separated from me…"

"Are you sure? You can be pretty annoying, but you've always be so close."

He scoffed and looked away. "I'm sure… our bond is close to souring, if it hasn't already …
I've poisoned myself with some potions. At first I thought it was just me being careless, but
I'm convinced it was because my magic is compromised because we're no longer
compatible."

"Oh, that is serious… sheesh… is she on board too?"

"She will be."

Shoko sighed. "Wait, you didn't tell her what you were going to do? Gojo! How could you
not tell her? Don't you think she will feel betrayed?"

"No, I don't," he snapped. "She was the one that brought it up— now she claims she only said
it because she was mad, but c'mon, you don't just say those kinds of things if you haven't
really thought about it deep down.

"I know you don't get how these things work but… familiars don't just start disliking their
masters outta nowhere, it's like hating oneself… even the most abusive masters don't have to
worry about their familiar going against them…"

But he swore he'd been nothing but kind to her. He respected her, gave her her own room, let
her make her own decisions. Why would she turn on him? Where had he gone wrong?

Shoko took another drag from her cigarette, the smoke clouding the air between them in a
thin haze. "Those familiars don't have their own will though, do they?" She asked.
Satoru sighed and reached over to steal another candy from the jar. "I honestly don't know.
That's a tough question… because ideally, familiars are supposed to mirror their masters,
they're supposed to be the same— they are the same, they should be…their loyalty should be
unquestionable."

"Hmm, but doesn't a mirror reflect the opposite of its image?" Shoko mused.

That's… a good point… and if he thought about it that way, then it made more sense than he
thought.

He and Utahime were opposites down to the letter, physically, their view on how the world
functioned, even their magic were opposite of each other.

The stark contrast between them suddenly became so obvious that it was a wonder how they
had worked so well together at all at one point.

But the thing that didn't add up was the fact that many familiars were perfect matches to their
masters, even naturally.

But Satoru gave Utahime the freedom to be different, to be herself, and that just reinforced
the reason why he was here in the first place.

She said she thought it was best if their was a barrier between them…

"I dunno, Shoko… that's a good point, but it's so rare… besides society doesn't think that
way, and this is Utahime— she's not going to suggest severing our connection 'cause she will
think she is a failure, witches don't take too kindly to familiars that reject their masters. It's a
rare phenomenon. It's considered shameful. A bond that has truly soured can even make the
witch in question sick. Worst case scenario they can get corrupted, and eventually die.
Familiars have been executed for this—"

As soon as he said it his stomach dropped as a cold rush of realization swept through him. He
was sick. Nothing he did helped it, and he's only gotten worse. She'd kill him if they stayed
bonded much longer…

"How do you know she rejected you? What if you rejected her?" Shoko asked. "Isn't that
more acceptable? Witches trade and sell familiars all the time."

He sighed and rubbed his temples. "It doesn't work that that way… besides, just look at me,
Shoko… I'm sure you'll find your answer…"

She frowned and stood up. "You said it was just because of the trip– here, let me…" she held
her hands up and encased him in the soft white glow of her healing magic.

The aura eased the ache that had been plaguing him for only as long as she had it active. The
moment she stopped that deep pain resurfaced.

"Any better?" Shoko asked hopefully.

He smiled wryly. "Only in the moment…"

She frowned and sank back in her chair. "Damn… I've never seen this before, not to this
extent… this is actually pretty bad."

He leaned forward. "No one will know about this. We'll tell anyone that asks that I got tired
of her. It's better to be pitied than to be considered faulty or broken, or worse, tainted, if they
find out about this… they will put her to death, they will fear her, think she's corrupted— and
I know she isn't… she can't be…"

Shoko looked at him warily, her brows furrowed. "Are you sure? If she is corrupted—"

"She isn't."

"But if she is… she could turn into a demon…"

Satoru sighed heavily and slouched low in the chair. He didn't want to think about that, but it
was even more a reason to release her. If she did turn into a demon, it would corrupt him too,
and as strong as he was, he couldn't risk it. Especially with how easily he could fall off the
deep end…

The situation suddenly felt terribly dangerous.

"It's too dangerous to risk… releasing her should cleanse whatever corruption may be
present, it's the only way, after a few days, she should be cleansed enough for you to bond to
her without issues, you can always cast a purification spell to be safe," he said, strained.

"I hope you tried to talk to her."

He sighed and slouched further into the chair. "Of course I did. She is as stubborn as an ox,
but she wants this. She's been hiding from me for months at this point, years even I'm sure…
You can barely tell she's linked to me anymore, and that's not my doing," Satoru said around
the growing lump in his throat.

"Well… what about what you want?" Shoko asked.

He shut his eyes and willed the burn in them to go away. "I just want her to be happy… and if
that means being away from me, then so be it. I still don't understand what happened… but I
guess I don't need to understand it to do the right thing… We fought constantly on the way
here, Shoko… it's draining… Besides, it's not like I have a choice anymore… she's killing
me… even if it isn't on purpose."

"Does she know?? About your condition?"

He frowned and shook his head. "She won't ."

Utahime figured out he was ill, but she didn't know he was actually slowly dying. And he
wasn't going to tell her.

Shoko was silent for a long time before she let out a heavy sigh. "Okay… so why me?"

Satoru sat up and held her gaze. "Like I said, you're the only one I trust to be kind to her. You
two are already friends, and you are protected by the best in the kingdom. As much as I don't
want her to be here, what I want doesn't matter. Even though I'm sure what she really wants is
complete freedom, that's unfortunately not possible. Unbonded familiars are vulnerable—
The second word gets out that I've severed our bond, witches from all over will want to
snatch her up for themselves. She has been linked to me for almost twenty years, there is no
way her natural magic wasn't affected in some way, they'll covet her.

"Her association with me puts her in danger, they will want the knowledge she has— the
secrets I've shared with her, the techniques we developed together, the energy that I've
weaved into her bones. Even if she doesn't have much currently, they will still want to drain
her magic in the hopes of extracting some remnants of mine, even if it means killing her.
Being your familiar is the only way to protect her, because hurting her will mean hurting you,
and hurting you will mean betraying the King himself because your unique healing keeps the
old bastard in top health."

Shoko set her cigarette in her ashtray and blew the last puff in the air. "You've put a lot of
thought into this."

He nodded. "I had to."

"Being connected to her will put a target on my back too you know," Shoko sighed.

"I know."

She smirked and shook her head. "How can you be selfish but so selfless at the same time?"

He grinned and shrugged. "I've got a knack for dealing with impossibles and inbetweens."

"That you do… alright. I'm on board, but no payment, or iou's or favors," she said and
pointed a quill at him. "I'm simply being a good friend."

Satoru sighed in relief and nodded. "Thank you so much Shoko, if you ever need anything in
the future, let me know, seriously."

"I'll keep that in mind," she said and stood up. "So when do we do it?"

"The sooner the better… I can't stand being here for long… I'm going to talk to her one last
time… I'll come back either way with her, sounds good?" He asked as he drifted over to the
door.

"Okay, I'll draft up a contract for her… Good luck, Gojo…" Shoko murmured.

He smiled wryly and nodded. "Thanks."

 Chapter 7
Chapter Notes

Everyone buckled in?

See the end of the chapter for more notes

This was probably the first time he was ever so nervous that he felt like he was going to
puke.

Even right up until the moment he challenged the King to a duel, he was more excited than
whatever this horrible feeling was.

The crazy part was, back then he was well aware the punishment for failure was death, and
yet as he burst into the throne room, all he remembered feeling was excitement and
confidence.

Even when he learned he'd be fighting the elite army instead, he still never wavered.

Though he had Utahime in his ear feeding his ego with the confidence of the century. It was
such an amazing feeling, he swore he could do anything, truly believed it at one point. She
made him feel indestructible

You got this, Gojo! Can you imagine the look on their faces? When you win!?

Let them underestimate you, it'll only make the victory sweeter!

You're strong, like strong, strong, you're the only one in the realm that can do this! You were
born for greatness!

It doesn't matter how many losers they throw at you, we got this! I'm with you!

You're not alone you know? I believe in you.

You can do it, Satoru! I'm with you to the end!

He froze with his hand on the door knob and his heart in his throat. "I guess this is the end,
huh?…" he mumbled to himself, devastated, but still foolishly hoping he was wrong.

Utahime was sitting on the bed in her human form when he walked in. She was hugging her
knees to her chest, and she looked like she'd been crying.

As soon as he noticed he felt at fault. She was probably thinking about their shitty trip, and
all the mean things he said.

"We need to talk."

"Gojo, I wanted to— oh," she clutched her hands together and bit her lip. "I'm sorry, you go
first."

Satoru shifted awkwardly and scratched the back of his head. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah…"

"Okay," he took a deep breath and carefully took his sunglasses off. "You know how I
mentioned I had things to take care of down here? Well, the letter isn't the only reason we're
here," he forced out.

Her brows furrowed. "Oh, why else?"

"I've been… thinking about what you said… about wanting to serve someone else—"

"I wasn't serious!" She cut in quickly.

He resisted the urge to take her for her word and drag her stubborn ass home, because as
much as he wanted to believe her, he didn't, couldn't, not anymore. Not when she already
lied to his face so many times. Not when he was physically ill because of it. How could he
trust her now?

"It's okay, Hime…" he murmured and moved to sit beside her. Even if she moved away, he
wanted to sit as close to her as possible because this was the last time he'd ever feel the
soothing pulse of her magic, even if it was faint.

But surprisingly, she didn't move away, not even when his weight made her sink closer to
him.

"You won't be considered a failure, just tell everyone that my ego got too big and I thought
you were holding me back, everyone that asks will believe you, they'll even be jealous of
you– for being my familiar at all," he said and forced a smile when she looked at him.

Her eyes were wide and watery. She looked devastated, and he didn't really know why.

"G-Gojo… you can't be serious… are you?" She whispered.

"I am…" he said and took a deep breath. "It will be the best thing for—"
"I don't want this!" She growled and stood up to face him. With him sitting down and the
height of the bed, he was pretty much at eye level with her.

"You do, Hime, it's okay, you don't have to keep pretending—"

"How dare you?! Why would you make this decision for me?! You never thought to ask? You
didn't think for one second that maybe I don't want this?!" She yelled, her cheeks red with
anger. But it was her aura that confused him because her magic was erratic and twisting, she
was panicking.

It was making him feel it.

He rubbed his hand over his face and took a deep breath. "I did ask you, I asked multiple
times, I asked if you were happy, I asked if you liked the life we built, I asked you what was
wrong, why you were angry, and you lied. Hell, Hime, you even said you are happier with a
veil between us…. You don't have to keep pretending," he reiterated. "It isn't helping the
situation, I want to end this as peacefully as—"

"Oh, so you want to end it?! Why don't you just say that instead? Why don't you be a man
and tell the truth instead of skirting around it and blaming me!?" She spat out.

He took a deep breath and silently reached over and pulled the ribbon out of her hair. "Then
explain this," he demanded, his lips set into a thin line.

Her eyes widened and jumped between the ribbon and his face. "W-What do you mean?"

"I mean, explain this," he nearly growled, frustrated. "Explain why it is almost see through,
when it shouldn't be! Did you even realize it was falling apart?" He asked and shoved it back
in her hands.

Her hands shook as she looked it over. "I-It's just old, Gojo—"

He laughed darkly, insulted. Was she serious? "Do. Not . Insult me. It's a magic item, it
shouldn't be able to deteriorate! This links you to me, and look at it! Explain why it is frayed,
explain why it's falling apart, explain why we're falling apart! Explain it, Utahime!" He stood
up and got in her face.

She stepped back with a gasp, her neck craning so she could look at him.

"Why are you so angry all the damn time!? Why can't I make a joke anymore without you
losing your fucking mind, why are you always insulting me lately?! Explain why you have
been blocking me out! Why can't I see my magic in you anymore!? Why? Why, Utahime?
Why??"

She stepped back again. "Calm down, Gojo. I… I don't know what you're talking about!"
He grit his teeth in frustration. She was lying again. He could taste the bitterness in the back
of his throat.

"You're fucking lying, again, I know you want something. I can feel it. What is it? What do
you want? Why can't you tell me? You know everything about me, you know what I'm made
of! You know I can give you whatever you want! Whatever it is, it doesn't matter! Anything,
anything you can think of, it's already yours—" He laughed, a bit crazed, his mind frazzled,
and he snatched her face in his hands.

She gasped.

"It's already yours! Don't you realize? How can you not realize?? If it doesn't exist, I'll make
it exist! If there isn't a way, I'll make a way! I'll force it into reality, I'll carve it out of the
cosmos, I'll turn everything into stardust if it'll make you happy, I'll reverse the river for you,
Hime— I'll—I-I—"

Something warm rolled down his cheek and he flinched and suddenly realized his vision was
blurry.

He abruptly let her go and stepped back. His hand shook as he rubbed his cheek and his
stomach dropped when he noticed what he initially felt was a tear. In fact it was tears.

He was crying, and he didn't even realize…

He blinked rapidly and refocused on her face, and he only felt worse.

Her eyes were wide like saucers, tears were streaming down her face too, her lip was
trembling, and she had a strange look on her face that he didn't recognize.

He honestly had no idea if his tears were his own or not anymore…

A cold breeze blew through the room, and he glanced at the window only to see a giant hole
in the wall, or what was left of the wall. The rest of the walls in the room were littered with
severe cracks, even the tiled floor was destroyed.

Oh. He didn't even realize he did that…

He didn't feel like fixing it.

He just wanted her to say something… anything…

But she didn't. She just stood there and stared at him, and then, softly, calmly…
"Y-You shouldn't say things like that, Gojo…"

Oh…

Why did hearing her say that hurt so much? Still… she was right.

He was saying crazy shit again…

"I'm sorry…" He croaked, voice hoarse. He wasn't used to yelling and had been doing so in
spades all week. He never apologized, but the words left him without him realizing. Much
like how he'd gone off the rails just then. He felt so sick, his vision was swimming.

He stumbled back until he felt the bed hit the back of his knees and he sank down with a
heavy sigh.

He was exhausted. That deep pain was back again, this time centered in his chest.

He didn't know how Utahime did it. How could she yell for so long without feeling like she
was going to die?

But then again… He was actually dying…

Damn, his head hurt too.

"I'm sorry, Utahime," he repeated in a whisper.

When she didn't say anything he took a deep breath and shoved all of the confusion as deep
as he could. He wasn't getting anywhere, all he was doing was further ruining chances of
salvaging the friendship he desperately wanted to cling to.

A want that was starting to feel very one sided…

"You don't have to worry… I-I convinced Shoko to take you under her wing— no
transactions— you'll be safe with her," he mumbled and forced a smile.
"Okay," she mumbled and looked down at her feet.

"It's for the best," he mumbled, part to fill the heavy silence, mostly in the hopes that she'd
fight him on it. She fought him so much lately, he wanted her to fight him on this too…

He wanted her to scream at him, throw something at him, hit him, something , anything…

He wanted her to fight for them…

"Okay…" she whispered again instead.

He felt ill. "Oh… kay…"

They met in the castle gardens on a bright sunny day in the spring.

It was warm and breezy, precisely the kind of day that young Satoru loved to go out and play.

He was five years of age and already learned that a small tremble of his lip and a bat of his
magical eyes could get him just about anything. So he used this ability to convince the wet
nurse watching over him to let him outside.

Where he ran off into the gardens as fast as his legs could carry him. Being small and
energetic, he could easily get away from an older woman in layered skirts.

And so he spent the afternoon chasing bees and butterflies, tossing bugs into spider webs, and
tasting things he probably shouldn't be.

But he was enamored with the colors that filled the gardens, being able to see shades that no
one had names for. The beetle that was green but not quite, the butterfly whose wings
mysteriously matched his eyes, the bee that had all those tiny little hairs, and all the weird
shapes in the red of a fly's eye.

So when he saw the tiny shadow dart across the garden, he just had to give chase.

You're not a shadow! He had said to the tiny ball of fluff he cornered near the rose bush.

No, I'm a girl! The tiny ball had said.

Satoru remembered how confused he had been. Girls weren't tiny fluffy balls, were they?

But this one was apparently, and this one was full of fury, and just so happened to look more
like a cat than anything.
You're soft!

Don't touch me!

Oh… why?

I… I don't know you.

Oh, I'm Satoru… who are you?

Um… I don't know…

You don't have a name?

No…

Oh, well… I'll call you, Girl for now! So, now we know each other!

He'd jumped at her after that, and chased the poor thing until he had her in his arms. You're a
cat! A cat that can talk… cool!

Oh… you think so?

Yeah. I do.

He'd carried her over to sneak food from the kitchen , and sat with her in the garden while
they ate the scraps he had salvaged.

Do you want to be my friend? He asked her at the end of the day, and they were both tired
from playing and running all throughout the gardens.

Yeah, I do, she had said and cuddled up close to his side.

He snuck her into his room a few days later to beat the rain, and a few days after that he
helped her pick out a name from his favorite story books. And a few days after that, he tied a
ribbon around her neck because— You're a girl, and all girls wear ribbons.

And it was a week after that while they were walking through town that she jumped on a cart
and snuck off with a pair of round sunglasses that were too big for his face.

You squint all the time but you see things just fine, so maybe it's the light?

And she'd been right, and from then on she never left his side…
.

It hadn't been his intention, but finding himself in the gardens where they met almost twenty
years ago felt appropriate.

He held her against his chest while he walked. Originally, he intended to go straight to see
Shoko, but his mind began to wander, and before he knew it he was outside in the familiar
gardens…

He stopped in front of the same rose bush he found her at, and carefully set her down in the
grass.

She changed back to her human form then, but kept her eyes focused on the ground.

"Don't worry, it won't hurt," he said as he finished drawing the required magic circle in the
dirt. It was overcast now, the sky dreary and dull, nothing like it was the day they met.

"I'm not worried," Utahime mumbled, her eyes still stuck to the ground.

"I know…" he said and stood up to face her.

Her hair was loose around her shoulders, the wind blowing it ever so slightly into her eyes.

The dress she wore was pretty, and he realized with a deep pang that it was the same dress he
got for her twentieth birthday…

A lovely blue dress that flowed around her so prettily… it still looked just as good on her.
Seeing her in it made him feel nostalgic.

He'd made lots of plans for her special day, twenty years was a big deal for familiars, and he
wanted it to be memorable for her. Special…

He remembered she'd been so happy that day, he didn't think he'd ever seen her smile the
way she did that day since. He'd taken her to a play, and then he'd taken her dancing…

They hadn't done anything fun like that together since… Why hadn't they? He would have
liked to…

In Utahime's hands was her ribbon, the frayed ends a sad reminder of what became of their
bond. He still didn't understand it, and he knew he never would. She sighed softly and gently
set it down in the middle of the circle.

This girl had been his shadow for damn near twenty years, she'd been his first friend, his best
friend, his inner voice, his light, his other half…
Satoru took his sunglasses off and set them down beside her bow in the center of the magic
circle. He held his hands together to start the spell, but hesitated.

Gods, he still wanted her to stop him.

After an awkward stretch of silence she glanced up at him with a frown on her pretty face.
"Uh, is it done? Or…"

He frowned and murmured the spell under his breath. Conscidisti animam meam in duas .

The sigils ignited with golden fire, the flames flickering slowly towards the center of the
circle.

"I think… we should say something nice about each other… before… it's over," he
mumbled.

"Is this for the spell?"

"It's for me," he said without thinking. "Erm… I mean, since our trip went so terribly, I
think it'll be good… for us… I'll, uh, go first…" he cleared his throat and forced a smile. "I'm
glad I met you, Utahime…"

She nodded stiffly. "Me too…"

The crackling of the fire between them quickly filled the silence, but all it did was make him
feel restless. The selfish part of him really didn't want to do this. He wanted to cancel this
damn spell and drag her home. He wanted to apologize to her, punish her, apologize again,
and make sure their fragile bond went back to how it once was… even if he had to force it.

They'd been so close that it was hard to tell where one of their energy's ended and the other's
began.

He saw her pretty much every day of his life. Even on the occasions they didn't speak, they
sat together, did chores together, bled together…

And he hadn't even realized it was falling apart until it was too late…

He had no memories of being without her, not really, not clear ones.

"I like the way your nose scrunches when you're confused or angry," he blurted out.

Her nose scrunched up. "We already said our nice thing."

"I have more."

"More isn't necessary."

"I like how you sing to yourself when you wash dishes, or garden."
She frowned and glared at him. "I do not!"

"Mh… then you were singing to the suds?" He smiled and playfully tugged a lock of her
hair. "Oor, you were singing to me?"

She smacked his hand away. "No."

"Hm…"

She took a deep breath and looked down at the flames as they slowly began to devour her
bow. She shuddered, and he felt the chill.

"I… I like how you… do magic…" she finally whispered.

"How so?"

"You… make it… feel like magic," she said even softer.

He smirked and leaned back on his heels. "And here I thought for the past twenty years you
hated it."

"It's just… annoying."

"Mh, do you have anything else?"

"I don't."

"I do… I have many things— I like that you'd always make orange juice for me on Sunday
mornings… Ah… I'm going to miss that," he murmured, and closed his eyes.

She huffed. "Luckily you can make your own juice."

"I can."

The flames began to consume his sunglasses now and he felt another cold uncomfortable
chill creep up his spine. It felt kind of like a burn, and simultaneously like something was
being torn up inside him…

It didn't hurt, but… It really did at the same time.

Utahime shifted awkwardly and bit her lip, she looked pained, her face reflected how he felt.
"I-I… like how your dimples show when you smile…" she whispered softly.

He immediately grinned and leaned in closer to her. "Really?"

She shoved him back. "Ugh– t-that's enough I think."

"But I have more things…" he said, suddenly desperate to get them all out before everything
between them turned to ash. He wanted her to know, he wanted her to know how much he
valued her, how much she meant to him, he needed her to know… just in case…

"I agreed to one thing."

"I like the adorable little huffy face you make when you're angry, your cheeks puff out like
mochi," he whispered quickly.

She huffed angrily and shot him a glare. "Stop."

"Why?"

"It's not necessary."

"I think it is."

"It isn't."

"Your turn."

"No."

"Just one more…"

She closed her eyes and hugged herself, and Satoru couldn't help but wonder if she was cold,
because he sure was.

"I like… your cooking… you've gotten really good over the years…" she said with a sigh.

He spoke quickly. "I like how you always shield your face with your hand when you eat, as if
you're trying to hide your chewing from me," he said, smiling.

"It's rude to talk with your mouth full!" She protested. "And why would you like that? That's
so weird."

"Mh, and I like how your hair sticks to your lips in the wind when you wear gloss," he
murmured and slowly tucked a rogue lock of hair behind her ear, pulling a few stands away
from her mouth in the process.

"That's weird, Gojo," Utahime whispered, her cheeks flushed pink. "You're saying weird
things, are you making fun of me?"

He shook his head, his throat felt tight. "I like the color of your hair…" he said as he twisted
a lock of it around his finger. "I like how it feels around my fingers."

She slapped his hand away, her cheeks a deeper pink than before. "H-Haven't I told you not
to say those kinds of things?!"
He caught her wrist and squeezed her hand gently. "I don't get why you don't want me to tell
the truth."

"Some things are better left unsaid," she whispered.

Satoru glanced down at the crackling fire, their bond was pretty much gone. He couldn't see
their items anymore, and when he reached within himself to tug on their bond — he felt
nothing. He felt hollow. He tightened his grip on her hand. Her hand felt so small in his own,
his fingers overlapped around her wrist. He liked that too, now that he thought about it…
Some things are better left unsaid…

"Hime—"

She shook her head. "It's done, Gojo…please just… let go…"

"I like how your hand feels in mine—"

"Gojo!" She whispered harshly and tried to pull her hand away. He held on even tighter.

"I like how small you are compared to me…"

"Shut up!"

He wasn't thinking anymore. "I like the way you say my name."

" Enough …" she growled and yanked her hand out of his grip, but he quickly grabbed her
wrist again and tugged her closer. "You can't just say those kinds of things…" she said,
breathless.

"Can you say it? One more time…"

She frowned and stepped away. "Gojo, stop , please, you're making this harder than it—"

"My name, Hime… please?" He whispered and stepped closer to her, over the ashes that once
tied them together.

She turned away from him and the lump in his throat burned so fiercely he felt like he
couldn't breathe. His heart was pounding.

"Hime—"

She suddenly threw her arms around him in probably the first real hug she's given him in at
least five years. He tensed, thrown off by her abrupt embrace. Before he could react she
turned around and ran.

He didn't let her get far, a second later he snatched her wrist out of the air and tugged her
back, she whirled on him, her eyes full of tears.

"Let me go!"
"No," he whispered around the lump in his throat.

"L-Let me go, Gojo! It's done!" She cried.

"I told Shoko I'd bring you to her."

She yanked on her wrist. "I don't want you to!"

"Hime—"

"N-No! Let me go!" She sobbed. "I-I hate you…" she added in such a soft whisper he almost
missed it.

"I-I know…" he murmured and bit his lip as he tugged her towards him, even as she resisted.

He yanked her forward, forcing her to lose her balance and crash into him. She pushed him
away, but he swiftly locked her in a hug, crushed her against him as tightly as he could. She
squeaked in protest, but he only tightened his grip.

Her hair was so soft, it felt like silk against his cheek. He nuzzled his face further into her
hair and sighed. He could still smell the faint sweet perfume of her shampoo, strawberries…

She stopped struggling and clung to him instead as her body shook as muted sobs trembled
through her.

"I-I'm sorry… I'm sorry… I tried… I-I tried to be good…" she mumbled against his coat.

"It's okay, it's okay, you are good, you're the best, you'll always be my favorite girl," he
rambled, muffled by her hair.

Gods this felt so… so right… and—

She stepped away.

"W-Why do you always say such things?" She whispered as she wiped her face.

He instinctively reached out to help her but she turned away, leaving him to awkwardly drop
his hand in the space between them.

Damn he had no idea how to answer her except for. "The truth?" He murmured around the
fire in his throat.

He subconsciously tugged on their link only to find nothing there and his head spun. It felt
wrong– so wrong– Like he was missing a piece of himself.

But this was the right thing to do. This way they could still be friends, this way they could
part ways on good terms…
 "I… I'll walk you back to Shoko… to be safe," he mumbled.

She shook her head and gently pushed his hands away, her eyes still trained on her feet. "I
can't… I can't bear it… You should just… go see Master Yaga. I'm sure he's worried…" she
whispered.

"Are you sure? I can go with you, the old man can wait longer—"

"I'm sure."

His mouth felt dry and he nodded dumbly. "Then… at least take this—" He mumbled and
plucked a strand of his hair off his head. "A piece of my infinity…" he explained and blew
on it, sending his magic into it.

And just because she said she liked it, when he enchanted it, he sent an iridescent shimmer
through it. It glimmered with an internal light, a faint lavender, a remnant of their combined
magic that he still clung to, a shard of what he firmly locked within himself like a dragon
guarding its hoard.

The strand shifted into a thin silk little ribbon in the air and slowly circled her left middle
finger like a ring before tying itself into a perfect little infinity knot.

"It'll disappear when you get to where you need to be…" he murmured softly.

Utahime looked down at her finger then finally at his face again.

The skin under her eyes was so red and puffy, her honey eyes glossy, and dull. Gods, he
hated seeing her like that…

"Goodbye Satoru…" she whispered and turned around and ran, and this time, he didn't chase
her.

This time, he didn't reach out to her.

This time, he let her go.

Chapter End Notes

This is only the beginning of the story friends!

The next chapter will be our girls pov. ♡

Conscidisti animam meam in duas.= Cut my soul in two/ Cut my life in two.
 Chapter 8
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

Utahime barely knew how to talk when she first learned her place in the world.

It was her earliest memory, she was asleep in a sunbeam beside an older spirit, had it been a
friend, a parent? She couldn't remember, and she would never know.

But the day had been nice, the sun was warm but then she remembered how the sun had
suddenly disappeared— they had been captured in a magic box.

Her companion was thrown into a carriage to be sold, and little Utahime was grabbed by the
scruff of her neck and poked and prodded before being thrown to the wayside. Too small to
be of use the strangers had said, too weak to be of any value. Not worth the bother.

She would only understand as an adult how lucky she had been to be thrown away that
day…

A few years later she was given a brutal reminder when a spirit who fed her scraps at night
was hung from her master's apple tree. The crime? Feeding unwanted food to an unwanted
child.

Utahime spent that night frightened and hiding in her dead friend's apron to hide from the
anger of who her friend had called Master as he rummaged and dug around, searching for
where she had gone.

He wanted to teach her a lesson, Show her her place.

As soon as the terrifying man went to sleep, she jumped off into the night and ran away and
never looked back.

Another year of running and drifting flew by when she was reminded yet again that she was
not worth even a passing glance.

She was curled up hiding in an old shoe she thought abandoned when she was lifted in the air
and thoughtlessly thrown down the street. She was lucky she landed on her tiny little feet.
That's when she learned she was incomplete, a wayward soul, a half being. If she was only
half, then where was the rest of her? Had she lost it somehow? Could she find it again? What
was this master that everyone spoke of? How did they know she did not have one?

You don't have a master? We don't sell to half beings, away with you…

No half-beings allowed on premises.

Tiny and masterless, even if she had a coin to spare for a few crumbs of bread, she was
looked over, looked through and ignored as if she weren't even there.

Somehow, some people could tell she was incomplete, and some people could not, she
learned that those who could not tell did not have the same kind of energy that she could see
floating all around her.

But she was drawn to the energy, to magic, and by listening and watching, she learned that
these people were witches, many of them had people just like her hanging around them.

So where was her's? Did she have to ask for one? That's when she learned she was what they
called, a familiar.

Utahime asked a random witch that night if he would be her master, because she desperately
wanted something fresh to eat, and she wanted to be complete.

But the witch had laughed, and said she was too small and weak and that she would be of no
use to him.

Who would want a familiar that has practically no magic? You're too tiny, and your magic is
practically non-existent. Go to the red light district, you'll at least be of use to someone there.

And so, trusting and naive, Utahime snuck into a room of one such place.

It was too warm inside, the energy was awful, and the smell was unbearable. The terrible
scent masked by some kind of perfume that made her eyes water.

Utahime had been in the room for only a few moments when she was grabbed by the scruff
of her neck and brought face to face with a woman, another being like her, a familiar.

She was beautiful, but she was furious. Her face looked like a painting, a sad one, an angry
one.

What are you doing here?! The woman had seethed.

I belong here, don't I? Utahime had asked, hopeful, her little heart thudding with unease.

The woman was like her, Utahime could sense it, but she was not kind. The door of the room
began to open, and the woman hurled her out of the window.

Leave here! And never return! The woman hissed and swiftly shut the window.

Confused, hurt, and frightened, Utahime ran away until she was sick.

Weeks later, she found herself in a small chapel where she discovered a shelf with round little
crackers. Starving, she snuck a bite of one before a young man the same kind as she snatched
her off the shelf.

You cannot stay here little one, if my master sees you there will be trouble, you are a girl, and
girls are not permitted back here. The man had said, but still gave her a bit of meat to stave
off the pain then set her down outside by a statue of a woman holding a star.

It was there with tears in her eyes that Utahime begged the pretty star lady to take her away,
for she no longer had the will to run.

Another week later, running once again, terrified and lost amidst a garden of beauty she was
too exhausted to see, she was finally found.

You're not a shadow! A small boy with stars for eyes had said.

Cornered and trembling, Utahime had grit her teeth and yelled with all her might. No, I'm a
girl!

The strange boy's starry eyes crinkled when he smiled, and his hand was just as dirty as she
was when he reached out to her and asked.

Do you want to be my friend?

And Utahime nearly cried when she sadly admitted. I'm incomplete… you wouldn't want
me…

But the boy's smile remained, and he held his hand closer to her face and said. You look
perfect to me. We can be friends, if you wanna be.
And Utahime had nodded and hesitantly pressed her tiny face into his little hand, and felt for
the first time, a gentle touch as he pet her between her little ears with the pads of his equally
little fingers.

Yes, I wanna be…

And if his eyes were stars, then his grin was like the sun.

As it turned out, the boy had been right, she was a shadow, the shadow to a boy with stars for
eyes, the shadow of a little piece of infinity.

And when he pulled her into his arms she knew she had finally found where she needed to
be…

Utahime was so, so proud of Gojo. She could barely believe he'd come so far! No one
believed an eighteen year old could accomplish such a feat by hand, but he'd done it, under a
year too! And though he used a touch of magic here and there, the majority of the building
was done by hand.

The shop looked beautiful too! It was perfect! She was so happy for him that she had tears in
her eyes.

"Uta! Look!"

Utahime set her paint brush down and stood up right as Gojo crashed into her. She gasped as
he lifted her up in the air and spun her around with a laugh.

"Uta, it's official! We've done it!" Gojo said, and nuzzled his nose against hers before setting
her down to shove a few documents in her face.

Utahime took them and quickly looked them over. It was the deed to their new shop, their
house, their home , and, shockingly, it had her name on it too.

"Gojo!" She whispered as she clutched the paperwork to her chest. "W-Why did you—?"
"Why not?" He asked as he dug through his pockets. "You helped me build this—"

"I hardly did anything!"

"You helped me with design and painting— this place is yours just as much as mine!" Gojo
said, and shoved a set of keys in her face. One was decorated with two little pointed cat
ears.

Utahime gasped and cupped her hands over his. "Is this… for me?"

He was grinning so much both of his dimples were showing. "Yup! I got one made just for
you, Uta! I want you to be the one to unlock the door!"

She took the key with the cat ears and clutched it to her chest. "It's already unlocked, Gojo,
we just put the lock on this morning!"

He nudged her closer to the shop. "It's symbolic, Uta, I want you to do it!"

Heat flushed into her cheeks and she nodded. "Fine, I'll use the key if you push the door
open!"

"Deal! C'mon!" He said and all but carried her to the front door.

She couldn't help but giggle in amusement, high on his excitement, and drunk off their shared
joy.

She turned the lock moments before Gojo pushed the door open, and then he was lifting her
into the air again, throwing her over his shoulder as if she weighed nothing.

She gasped in surprise and he cackled in amusement as he carried her over the threshold of
the home they spent the last few months building by hand.

Utahime struggled in a half hearted attempt to get free, but didn't really put any effort into it.

"Put me down, Gojo!" She demanded through breathless giggles.

"Never!" He said, laughing as he spun around, making her squeal.

"Ah! Don't drop me!"

He merely laughed again and spun her faster until they fell in a dizzy heap on the polished
hardwood, a tangled mess of limbs and laughter in the middle of the empty shop that held so
much potential and promise.

Overwhelmed, Utahime transformed into a cat so she could free herself, but Gojo just
grabbed her and tucked her in tight to his chest.

"We did it Uta, we did it… thank you…so much, " he murmured and kissed the top of her
head, making her heart thud oddly in her chest.
This wasn't the first time he did this, though he only did so while she was in her cat form. She
had no idea why, but it always made her heart react the same way every single time.

Utahime was glad he couldn't see her blush in this form, because she knew she'd be as red as
a tomato.

"W-What are you thanking me for?" She grumbled, forcing annoyance into her tone to mask
the confusing way her voice shook.

"You've helped me so much… We did this together… I wouldn't be here if not for you," he
squeezed her tightly for a few beats and sat up with a happy sigh, letting her move off to sit
beside him.

His shop, dubbed Fivesongs, an amalgamation of their own names translated to human
words. A tribute to their shared bond, he had explained, when he suggested it.

And Utahime had been speechless, not understanding why he would want to tie her name to
the shop he worked so hard to build, but he'd insisted, and she relented.

She relented because it was an honor and because he had been so excited to make the shop a
reality.

He wanted to help people, because he wanted to give humans a small taste of the comforts of
their world, because he wanted to use his magic for good.

"Mh, I'm proud of you, Gojo," Utahime murmured, and willed him to feel how much she
really was.

He grinned and scrambled to his feet. "Oh! Don't move, I left something outside," he said and
rushed off.

Utahime smiled to herself and waited patiently for him to come back, already expecting what
he was up to.

Gojo burst back in the building with a box of various stuff, already mid sentence when he
returned to her side, but she still knew what he'd said through their bond.

I got all this today because– "–I think we should camp out here for the night! Our first
official night in our new home!" He said, breathless and grinning as he all but collapsed
beside her, his long lanky limbs stretched out across the hardwood.

Utahime peered into the box and nodded. "Okay! That sounds fun!"
Beaming like the sun, Gojo dug out a few pillows from the box and various mismatched
blankets. He cocooned her in a patchy blanket and lifted her up to sit on a pillow before
draping a blanket over his own shoulders.

"I got us some food too," he said and took out a small paper bag with a modest sandwich. "I
know it's not much, but—"

"It smells delicious!" Utahime said happily. It was enough. It was more than enough. They
had a beautiful roof over their head and food to boot! It was perfect.

"It's got the sauce you like," he said and tore the sandwich in half and set a piece in front of
her.

"It's good!" Utahime said and happily ate while Gojo went on talking about how long the line
was in the town office he went to in order to register the shop.

He eventually moved on to talking about the prices in the market, and then to what kinds of
things he wanted to sell at the shop.

They'd already talked about the planned inventory for weeks while they built up the shop, but
Utahime listened anyway, excited for the future, excited for him.

He was lovely as he gushed about his plans, even with his sunglasses, his bright blue eyes
shined like the sunbeam that shone through the large window.

Utahime only ate half of the half he gave her, and jumped over to place the rest of her food
on his knee. She wanted him to have it. They'd been struggling with food for a while now,
most of their funds going to building the shop. She didn't miss how he gave her the bigger
piece of the sandwich, and she knew he needed more food than her.

She could make it through the day with less food simply because he was so much larger than
her. He got tired faster than her, he used more energy than she did, and as his familiar, she
could even afford to skip a few days of food all together so long as he was healthy enough.

He glanced at her and she nodded, urging him to take it without words.

He smiled, lopsided and pretty, and gently pet the top of her head as he accepted the food
from her. "Thanks, Uta," he murmured. "What would I do without you?"

She smiled and jumped up on his shoulder so she could nudge her head against his cheek.
"Lucky you'll never need to know!"

He grinned and pulled her back into another overwhelming hug. "I know."

A few weeks later they celebrated the grand opening of the shop by getting themselves a ton
of groceries so they could make themselves a feast for supper. They made all kinds of
different dishes, excited to finally have a proper meal.

The first day of sales was huge! Utahime had never seen so much money in their possession
before. Granted they had a lot of debt to pay off still, but they no longer needed to worry
about food.

"It's all thanks to you, Uta!" Gojo said as he peeled the potatoes Utahime set out for the stew
she was making. They'd taken turns making each dish, and the stew Utahime was making had
been her idea due to the cooling weather.

"I barely did anything!" She insisted, her cheeks warm from his praise.

"You hung up those papers for me, and I know you were advertising the shop when you went
out! Humans didn't stop asking about the adorable talking cat! We made bank, I'm so
grateful," he said.

Utahime smiled and looked up at him, let him feel just how happy and grateful she was for
him.

His grin widened and he pulled her into a tight hug, causing her to yelp in surprise. He
pressed his cheek against hers so closely, a bit of his unruly hair got in her mouth.

"Hey! You're going to make me mess up the food! " she half heartedly complained and
pushed his face away.

He laughed softly and nuzzled his face against her palm before stepping away. "Yeah, yeah,"
he mused and sat on the counter beside her and started prattling on about the strange requests
the humans asked him for and how he could solve their issues. Various aches and pains,
things they've forgotten, a table that won't stand straight, a haunted garden, all things he was
fascinated by, all things he was determined to find a solution for.

Utahime offered her two sense when needed, and shoved various things in his hands for him
to peel or mix to help in the cooking process.

He worked surprisingly efficiently while distracted, his eyes not even focused on what he was
doing as he stared off into space and yapped her ear off. Utahime wasn't actually surprised
though, he was good at everything, almost as if it was his second nature, to master any task
given to him.

Gojo Satoru was perfect, and that made her only want to try harder to keep up, to be of use,
to be worthy of the praise that he so easily gave her for the smallest of things.

Everyday when she opened her eyes she was only more honored that he was her Master, and
everyday she tried her absolute hardest to get him to beam at her with that absolutely radiant
smile of his.

Gojo's smile could literally enchant an entire room, and many times Utahime wondered if a
god really had blessed his birth as the maids at the castle often said.
Because when he used his magic his eyes would glow , they'd pulse with such a striking light
that she was left in awe of his magnificence.

They said the gods bled silver and gold, and many witches wondered if the unique silver
sheen of Gojo's hair indicated that he was more than he seemed. But even with as powerful as
he was, Utahime knew he still bled red, and so she did her best to remind him of that so he
wouldn't get himself hurt.

Of course she'd never tell him these things. As much as she adored him, hyping him up was
dangerous, and she believed it was her duty as his familiar to keep him safe, to keep him
tethered to the earth.

Why else had they found each other? Why else was their bond so tight despite her obvious
weakness in comparison to him?

"Here," Utahime said and tapped the spoon of stew against his lips so he could taste — and
shut up for a few seconds.

He grinned as soon as he tasted it. "That's good! I haven't tasted anything like that in awhile!"

"You said that about all the other food we made," she said, laughing, and reached over to
wipe the corner of his mouth with her fingers.

He angled his face to make it easier for her. "Mhm, but it is still true, besides you made this!"

Heat flushed in her cheeks and she quickly looked away to focus on the food. "You sayin' I
can't cook?!" She accused as an excuse to hide how flustered she was.

He snorted and squished her cheek. "Silly-Uta~" he murmured and reached over her head to
grab a nearby mixing bowl. "We should make a cake too! I haven't had something sweet in
ages."

Blushing, she nodded and grabbed the flour, eager to please him, eager to see that radiant
smile once more. "Okay!"

She adored him so much. Adored his shining eyes and playful laugh, his pretty smile, and
heart of gold…

.
They were a year into their business when they started struggling with supplies. Due to
market and environmental issues, getting ahold of the special plants they needed for the
potions Gojo made was almost impossible. Shipping was backed up weeks, and their funds
started to dip.

They were back to cutting on food when Utahime suggested they grow their own plants.
They should have from the start, the backyard was big enough, even if the dirt was dry and
bare.

Finding the time to get it ready was another story…

"What do you think?" Gojo asked as he moved his hands off Utahime's eyes.

Utahime looked around with her breath caught in her throat. Their backyard had been
converted into a lovely garden plot. The smell of fresh dirt was soft in the air, and there was a
modest stone path that winded through the plot that made it all look quaint and cozy.

"Oh my gosh, it looks beautiful! I can already imagine it full of flowers and herbs!" Utahime
exclaimed.

Gojo moved to stand in front of her, his signature lopsided grin decorating his face. He
looked so proud and excited, his pants still stained with dirt, giving away his efforts.

"Oh yeah? What kind of plants you thinkin', Uta?"

She grinned back and looked around. "Obviously the basics, sage, rosemary, thyme, various
mint— oh! Honeysuckle, wolfsbane, bloodroot– oh, you think we could get a hold of
firemoss, and toadflax? What about—"

"Whoa, whoa, hold up, I gotta write this down," Gojo laughed as he fumbled to get a piece of
parchment from his pocket. He picked up a stick and transfigured it into charcoal and quickly
took a few notes. "Do you want to plant some things for the kitchen too?"

Utahime gasped and nodded eagerly. "Great idea! Half can be a vegetable garden!

"We need a few berry bushes too in that case," he said, grinning.

"Strawberries?" Utahime suggested knowingly, matching his lovely smile.

"Mhm! All the red and blue berries," he said and added them to the list.

She moved over to him and stood on her tiptoes so she could look over the list in his hands.
He lowered it for her, and she noticed he'd added her favorite flowers to the list, and her
smile only grew.

"When do you want to get started?" She asked as she looked up at him.
He poked her nose with the charcoal. "This Saturday, we can go shopping for the seeds on
Friday during lunch and spend Saturday in the garden!"

Utahime wiped her nose and narrowed her eyes when she saw the black smudge on her hand.
"Gojo!"

He smirked and smudged more on her forehead. Utahime gasped dramatically, not actually
upset, and quickly swiped the charcoal from his hand.

He laughed and tried to steal it back, but she jumped back and shifted into a cat to get away.

"Can't get away that easy, Uta," he said, and lunged at her.

Utahime squeaked and jumped back again just in time to slip away. While he was clumsily
scrambling to his feet, she rubbed her paws on the charcoal and let him snatch her up.

She yelped when he lifted her into the air from the sudden orientation change and when he
turned her around to look at her she lightly smacked his cheeks with her paws– leaving her
little pawprints on his face.

Utahime laughed triumphantly and shared her sight with him for a beat so he could see her
victory.

For a few seconds his eyes flashed a golden amber, mirroring her own eyes, and his grip on
her relaxed ever so slightly before his charming grin resurfaced. When he blinked his eyes
faded back to ocean blue.

"Wow, did you see that handsome man?" he asked, smirking as he set her down on the grass.

Utahime rolled her eyes. "I dunno, I'll let you know if I ever see one."

He snorted softly and laid down beside her just as a sunbeam peeked out of the clouds. The
golden light lit his face up, making his silver hair look almost white in the direct light.

His skin was like marble, and when he smiled at her, it was uncharacteristically soft, it felt
every bit as enchanting as his full grin, but somehow even more potent.

She had to look away. It was too much.

"Thank you for this, I can tell you worked hard," she said after a few beats of peaceful
silence. I need to be better, I have to keep up…

"Hmm, nothing but the best for my favorite girl," he murmured.

Her heart slammed against her ribs and she risked a glance at his face. His eyes were closed,
and he looked so serene, Utahime nearly convinced herself she was hearing things.

It shouldn't feel weird, hearing him say something like that. Witches used possessive
language all the time in reference to their familiars, but at the same time, he's never said
anything like that to her before, and his tone had been far too soft. Even worse, her heart was
pounding like crazy…

Utahime scrunched her nose up in displeasure and lightly smacked his shoulder with her paw.
"Don't say things like that, dummy!"

He laughed and flicked a few stands of grass in her face, and they erupted into a flurry of
little white petals and pretty golden flakes.

She smacked a few out of the air, then pounced on his chest. "Brat!" She said with a huff.

"Oof! So heavy!" He complained with a dramatic groan.

She gasped. "I am not!"

He snickered and squashed her against him in a tight hug then rolled over and trapped her
under him.

Utahime yelped from the sudden weight, but found she wasn't uncomfortable, so she let it
be.

After only a few minutes he was out like a light.

She let him sleep. She knew he didn't sleep much. He worked hard running the shop, and
even though she helped him as much as she could, he always insisted she take breaks or just
go outside to enjoy the weather.

She felt a little guilty about it, but she also didn't want to deny a direct request from him, so
she did her best to bring him back trinkets and sweets from her adventures, or to find
something entertaining to watch and share with him.

Many times she'd lure people to the shop, using her walks as little advertisement runs.

She wanted the business to do well enough that he'd be able to cut the hours if he wanted.
Because as much as she liked sitting out in the sun, she adored this so much more– sitting
outside with him.

Being able to relax with him, and laze the day away… that's what she wanted most.

So she let him use her body as a little pillow, because deep down, she adored this. She
adored the way he'd nuzzle into her fur, adored the way he'd hold her so close…

──── ∞ ~୨°୧~ ∞ ────

It was custom for familiars to recognize their birthdays on the day they were bonded to their
masters. Since they weren't really seen as full beings in the first place, knowing the day they
came into existence didn't really matter, and many of Utahime's kind really didn't know when
they came into being.

If they changed masters, their written birthday, name and age changed. Only if they remained
in their former master's family were they permitted to keep their information the same.

Gojo had let Utahime pick her name when they first met. A privilege unheard of, but what
did children of barely five years know?

He knew how to read, and since she didn't, he read her a list of names he wrote that belonged
to characters in his storybooks that he thought sounded pretty. He patiently scoured through
all of the books in his room and then took a few more from the castle library until she finally
heard one that she liked.

I like Utahime… I think she had said.

Gojo smiled at her, his starry eyes twinkling. Yeah? I think it fits. I heard you singing before,
did you know Utahime means song princess?

Utahime had deflated a bit hearing that, saddened. But I'm not a princess… She explained.

But Gojo had shook his head and lifted her into his arms. You can be, you live in a castle
now, and you sing and it's pretty— you'll be Utahime, if you wanna be.

And she'd smiled, so happy she thought she might cry. Yes! I wanna be!

Being known as familiars of over twenty years in this day and age was an honor. It was rare
and even rarer still to be known as fifty or more. It meant that they were worth something, it
meant they were important, valuable, wanted .

They were closer to the fae in nature than anything, and could exist for many centuries
unbonded, while witches have only been known to achieve at most two.

Utahime celebrated her birthday on the day she met Gojo, because that was the day she felt
most alive, and the day that made the most sense. She considered herself to be at the very
least the same age as him, as she'd been a child as well when they met. So when she'd shyly
asked him to view her as his peer in age when he was twelve and their bond and by
extension, herself had only been seven, he easily agreed, claiming she could be older if she
wanted.
You probably are older than me anyway, you sure act like it! Bossy-Uta!

And Utahime had protested against such a nickname, but evidently let it go as she was never
actually mad at him. Annoyed maybe, but never anything more.

Besides, Utahime really didn't know if she was truly older than him, so she happily accepted
being known as his peer.

And it was on her twentieth birthday that Utahime made the worst mistake of her life…

──── ∞ ~୨°୧~ ∞ ────

"Happy birthday, Uta~Hi~me!" Gojo sang as he burst into her room, all smiley and hyped for
reasons that she had no clue over so early in the morning.

"Good morning, Gojo!" Utahime beamed, his happiness affecting her completely.

"I closed the shop today! We're going to celebrate your day!" He announced and tossed a dark
blue dress on the bed, along with a ridiculous burst of shimmery light. "Get dressed! I'm
taking you to a show!" He announced and rushed out of the room in a flurry.

Curious, excited, and nervous, Utahime jumped to her feet and inspected the dress. It was so
soft! This kind of material was expensive! What was he thinking?

Nervous, she changed into the pretty dress, and applied a bit of pink gloss to her lips, just
because it felt appropriate. After brushing her hair into a half up ponytail, she made sure her
precious bow was safely secured to her ponytail.

It was a new style, one she privately experimented with. Her twentieth birthday seemed as
good a time as any to change out of her typical loose pigtails.

Satisfied with her hair, she pulled on her lace up boots before hurrying to the living room
where Gojo was.

As soon she stepped into the room he rushed to her side. "Look at that, it looks good on you!"
He said, grinning. "Lemme see a twirl~!"

"It's too nice, Gojo!" She argued, worried about their budget, but hesitantly twirled for him
anyway. The dress really was lovely, the skirts kicked up around her so prettily.

Gojo whistled. "Prettier than a princess~"

Utahime glared at him. "I'm not! This is way too much!"

He was all smiles, his cheeks just a tad rosey– probably holding back a laugh. "Nonsense,
you deserve the absolute best! I like the new hair by the way, it looks good."

Her face warmed. He noticed quickly! "Thank you…"

He nodded, smiling still so prettily. "Mhm~"

He summoned a small pastel purple box into his hands. It poofed with similarly colored
glitter to the way their entwined magic glowed, and when he handed it to her, it pulsed with a
delicate warmth.

"Happy birthday, Hime," he murmured, his smile soft.

"Oh… Gojo! It's too much!" Utahime whispered, afraid to even touch it.

"You haven't even seen it yet!" He said and gently nudged into her hands. "Open it, Uta,
please?"

Blushing, she nodded and carefully opened the box.

Inside was another smaller box that fit in her hand. It was the same purple color of their
combined magic, a beautiful soft lavender. It was decorated with silver and embellishments,
and her hands shook as she shot him a glare, already knowing this was definitely too
expensive. But his excitement was impossible to ignore, he was practically vibrating at her
side from it, so she took a deep breath and opened up the little box.

She gasped.

Silver tiny figures of birds came to life, they flew in a small circle to a beautiful, soothing
tune— an enchanted music box that fit in her hand.

"Gojo!" Utahime whispered, in awe and speechless.

"Little birdies for my pretty little songbird," he murmured and gently tucked a lock of hair
behind her ear.

Face ablaze, Utahime looked down so she could examine the intricate details on the tiny
music box. The silver birds almost looked alive, and the song was one she sang often. It was
one she knew without really knowing how, a song that came from her heart.

My pretty little songbird…

He started calling her that on occasion after catching her singing with the birds one foggy
morning in their backyard garden. She thought it was ridiculous, especially since she was no
bird! And she told him as much, but he merely laughed and blinded her with his perfect,
beautiful smile and patted the top of her head.

Do you want to know what it's like to be one? He'd asked, that pretty smile still on his face,
his eyes glowing with magic.

And Utahime had declined out of stubbornness and he merely laughed and waltzed away, but
ever since then she couldn't help but look at the sky and wonder…

"Now you have birds to sing with when the ones outside your window are away for the
winter~" he said as he stepped away.

Utahime nervously fussed with her hair and beautiful dress, another gift from him she
realized. She was speechless, and suddenly felt overdressed and out of place.

Gojo reached forward and gently tilted her chin up. "Do you like it, Hime?" he murmured
softly and gently brushed his fingers along the line of her jaw.

His gentleness threw her off, had he always been so sweet? She also couldn't help but notice
her newest nickname, she had no idea why, but it was one of her favorites.

"I… I love it…" Utahime whispered, her eyes watery with a deep, strange emotion. She
carefully closed the box and cradled it to her chest for a beat before setting it on the table.

He grinned and grabbed her hand. "Good. I knew you would, come on! Now we can get to
the fun part~" he said with a wink and dragged her outside.

"Y-You shouldn't say such things!" Utahime protested, half hearted and soft. Something deep
was swirling in her soul, and it fluttered like a bird in a cage.

He glanced back at her, his smile lopsided and lovely. "What things?"

"N-Nothing!"

He laughed and tightened his grip on her hand.

She adored how proudly he always held her hand, even in public. As if they really were
equals and not servant and master…

Her best friend, her partner, her other half, her better half, the strongest, most beautiful piece
of her soul.
.

The show he took her to was an outdoor human play put on by a traveling acting troupe. It
had everything she loved. Drama, romance, heartbreak, and a heartfelt reunion that had her
jumping up and down in applause.

As the crowd was dispersing he grabbed her hand again and dragged her away to a party that
was being held in one of the seaside taverns.

It was crowded and loud, and Utahime was tempted to shift into her cat form so she could sit
on his shoulder. She didn't like how crowded it was, it made her nervous to have so many
people bump into her. But then he surprised her by throwing his arm around her shoulders,
and shoving a pint of mead in her hands, and all of her nerves melted away.

Using a lute, a fiddle, some kind of hand drum, a tambourine, and what looked like a small
flute, the humans brought the tavern to life with exciting music that made the music at the
castle balls seem boring in comparison.

Gojo was only two drinks in, and herself double that when she learned that he absolutely
could not hold his alcohol. He was pink in the face and extra giggly when he pulled her out to
join the lively dance.

He tripped over himself and laughed at nearly everything, but still somehow managed to look
graceful and charming. They spun in circles until she was dizzy and even when they switched
partners when the dance called for it, she still found herself drawn back to him. Utahime
herself felt like she had drunk more than she had, but all she really cared about was the
radiant smile on his beautiful face.

Three dances in and an extra drink each, Utahime found herself hanging off his neck, her
arms looped around him, his hands on her waist, her vision filled with nothing but the
startling blue of his eyes.

And even when she was lifted into the air by a kind stranger during one of the dances many
turns, her eyes never left the pools of bright, shining blue that sparkled in the warm light.

He was grinning, his smile showing both of his pretty dimples, his cheeks flushed the color of
the outside layers of her magic.

Gojo grabbed her hands and her world blurred into pretty colors, and beautiful lights as even
the notes of the music seemed to dance around her in glittering waves of gossamer.

She giggled as they spun, everything spun, overjoyed by the atmosphere, enamored with his
adamant attention.
She could feel the familiar weight of magic in the air like a warm blanket around her
shoulders, snug and sweet. She tasted vanilla and honey, and she knew he had cast some kind
of spell, but it only made her feel that much more ecstatic. The energy that clung to her limbs
made her shiver, it was soothing and sweet, heavy and comforting, it made her warm, made
her heart race.

The lanterns that hung against the wall looked like soft balls of fire, and even the dust in the
air glimmered like tiny golden flecks of stardust that swirled around in the air like the arms of
the heavenly belt at night.

And at the end of their fourth dance, clinging to each other, overheated, breathless and
grinning, overwhelmed from drink, energy, lost in the swirling, glowing, impossible blue of
his eyes, and that strange, strange emotion that had been plaguing her for the last few years,
Utahime spoke without thinking.

"I-I'm– I'm so in love with you, Satoru," she whispered and clumsily rose to the tips of her
toes to press her lips against his.

She nearly missed, short, and dizzy as she was, but then her lips slipped smoothly over his
like they were always meant to be there, and a rush of pleasant heat lit up her nerves.

The energy that was rushing through her was electric. She was lost at sea in a violent storm,
with him as her lifeline.

Soft, his lips felt so soft, and she was only just processing how warm and sweet when she
realized—

What was she doing?!

Horrified, she abruptly jumped back only to see his beautiful eyes widened in shock, and his
lips now tainted a blush pink…

"Hime—?"

She fled, shoved a random woman towards him as she took off running out into the night,
dizzy, nauseous, and absolutely terrified. What had she just done?!

It was terribly taboo to feel such things for one's master. Illicit couldn't even describe how
immoral and illegal it was. Her kind was put to death for far less!

She had no business harboring such dangerous and forbidden feelings for Gojo!
Unclean, and improper, those were the words that typically described such things. It was a
grave offense, a capital sin, shameful.

Then the fact that she'd acted on it?!

Even if inebriated, she was still aware enough to know right from wrong, she should have
known, but the words had bubbled out of her as sudden as a lightning bolt.

But deep down she knew, she knew the feelings had been festering for far longer.

The deep adoration that she held for her master had actually been tainted with a deep
yearning that she was only now realizing…

All at once the years of lessons she was given at the castle bombarded her psyche like
stones.

You live to serve, you are to be a loyal servant, nothing more.

You are a living tool, a— what was that?

No, anything more will taint your bond, do you want to curse your Master?

This is how the gods have ordained it. Do you want to taint your bond?

She could curse him, taint him!

Horrible, horrible, horrible!

What had she done? How could she let this happen?!

What have I done?!

 No, it was simply the alcohol and the energy in the room, nothing more. She couldn't
entertain even the thought of what she'd done.

An accident, a moment of weakness, a mistake, that's all it had been. She'd been too drunk,
too overwhelmed by the air, too weak…

She could only hope that he had been too drunk himself to realize what she did.

Utahime ran straight to her room, her eyes full of tears and her heart in her throat. She fell to
her knees at her bed and prayed to the gods for mercy and forgiveness.

And by some miracle they had heard her desperate pleas, for when Utahime joined Gojo the
next morning for a late breakfast, both hungover and exhausted, he greeted her with his
typical, shining smile.

And thankfully, no word of her sin was ever mentioned…

Utahime thanked him for all that he did for her, kept her head down to avoid the power in his
eyes, blamed her headache, blamed her lack of sleep.

And when he smiled and handed her a tonic to clear her head, and ease the pain, she thanked
him once more with a small smile of her own and silently weaved a veil around her mind and
her heart.

Utahime spent the next month carefully unraveling the threads of his magic that were tightly
merged with her own. All the while she gradually perfected the veil she had weaved until she
was confident nothing could pierce it.

She buried her sinful feelings deep, smothered them like a flame, and made sure to leave
them in the fiery inferno they belonged in.

Chapter End Notes

I wanted the previous chapter to feel like a breakup/divorce, and the first part of this chapter was meant to give off
newlywed vibes ... what do you think ?
Please drop by the Archive and comment to let the creator know if you enjoyed their work!