FAR SIDE OF PAIN

ON THE FAR SIDE OF PAIN

This page has been deliberately left blank
Pain is plain on the far side of pain
~ Aaron Mutama
Table of contents

Cover
Title page
Dedication
Epigram
Chapter 1 ................ Self awareness

Chapter 2. ............... Undefinable

Chapter 3. ................. The problem is not the the problem

Chapter 4. ................. The blind side

Chapter 5 ................... imagination

Chapter 6 ................... Consistency

Chapter 7. ........... acceptance is key

Chapter 8. ............ failure is success

Chapter 9. ............... Cry like a Child

Chapter 10. ............... Heal thy Soul

Acknowledgments

Copyright

Selected Biographies

About the author

About the publisher

 DEDICATION

I Dedicate this book to you and every other people who is going through hard times, this
will help you navigate through challenges with confidence.
Epigraph
There is no coming to consciousness without pain
~ Carl Jung

Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional

~ Buddhist proverb

If you feel pain you’re alive, if you feel other people’s pain, you’re a human being
~ Leo Tolstoy
 CHAPTER ONE

SELF AWARENESS

Identity is the only line that links death to life

~ Aaron Mutama

If you were to give something to a man , give them identity. No matter where you go, no
matter what you do or what you have achieved, you need to know who you are , that’s
the essence of your life.
According to psychologist Tasha Eurich
She stated that 95% of people think they are self aware, where in actuality only 10 % to
15% really are ! You might be in the ninety five percent or ten percent, what’s peculiar is
to aura self transcendence. The greatest Greek philosopher who ever lived, Socrates
once said, “Man know thy self.” This single statement has transcended generations and
generation because of it’s imperative nature.
True identity is not about blood or family. It’s about being perfect in your imperfections
and it’s about been like God or anything you agnostically or pantheistically believe .
My whole life i was labeled dull, they called me all sorts of names , society painted me
black, my primary teachers thought I was never or close of not been in school and I
believed that too!
My father is a biggest coward that I have ever seen, he was never there for me, never
showed me how to be like a man and he had failed to give me my identity, but I realized
that it’s not about who didn’t but it’s about who you are,it's personal.
Thales Miletus said, "The most difficult thing in life is to know yourself."
Finding your identity is a lonely road, it’s difficult, it’s daunting but the results of your
quest are divine and beautiful!
Identity is not relational or something that you share, it’s about being who you are, it’s
about being yourself.
The Universe is made of countless, millions and billions of elements and one element
doesn’t make up the entire universe, it’s about all the entities together.
In the same context, identity is not only about a brain, thoughts , qualities or
characteristics, it’s what makes up all the elements altogether.
God is the element of all there is, in the same way, you are all that there is , in your own
embodiment.
Many people have been discouraged or have lost a glance of hope because people
judge their behavior, character or personality. There opinion might be right but that
doesn’t identify who they are.
Your emotions, expression or character about you is like a single star in the galaxy. It’s
only a part of you .In the words of Epictetus:
Practice saying to every harsh appearance: You are an appearance, and in no manner
what you appear to be.

True search for true identity is deep as the deepest ocean and as high as the highest
mountain. But identity or self is attainable . Leo Tolstoy was right when he said, without
knowing what I am , and why I am there, life is impossible.when an instinctive man rose
from the ground and said , " I am ."That was the breaking through to all invention,
development and creativity. With so much going on around, technology for example, it
has become even harder to be self and to find self . Paramahansa Yogananda said , "
Millions of people never analyze themselves. Mentally they are mechanical products of
the factory of their environment, preoccupied with breakfast, lunch, and dinner, working
and sleeping, and going here and there to be entertained. They don’t know what or why
they are seeking, nor why they never realize complete happiness and lasting
satisfaction. By evading self-analysis, people go on being robots, conditioned by their
environment. True self-analysis is the greatest art of progress.”. We have to align
ourselves to our souls ,burning desire and truth identity. You may not have it in totality
but the yawn and search for it is what makes it thrilling. I was recently, seeing a movie
based on true story called, Into the world! Where the protagonist left everything and
decided to throw everything away at a window inconclusive of a long life savings,
expensive car s, relationships and off course a degree. To walk in the walking of self
discovery and awareness! There's more to life than life we know . This may sound
superficial, many of us wouldn't dare to even entertain such an despicable thing as it
may sound.
In my view, waking with a colony or mob is a sign of weakness because we often solely
depend on the team or strength of other people.
When you find peace, or simply in serenity, in been alone, you are not far off to a heavenly
road! If it may please you ,ask the Buddhas monskys. You may wish to know, on what
grounds,should I say this things? Well, I isolated myself for a year and half, and I was able
to alignment myself to my Chakras ! Even since,my life has completely revolutsonarized. If
i was able, you are more than capable to affirm your ultimate unity. Ralph Waldo Emerson,
American essayist and philosopher, said, " To be yourself in a world that is constantly
trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. We stop living, the
moment we stop searching and seeking to find right questions .Everybody, has the
answers but it's not everyone who has right question. For it is better to have right question
than a thousand answers altogether.
This profound topic is my first chapter not by coincidence! During, my trying moment, this
information was the only thing, I needed to open my third eye.
You may wish to go into the woods, hills,mountains or under the seal( make use you carry
oxygen), my point is , you should be able to align your aura chakras of individuality. I beg
to defer with philosophies, who said or supported the assertion , human beings are just a
thinking animal. We are beyond thinking animals. To even determine, ourselves, human
should be questionable.
Ramana Maharshi was born Venkataraman on 30th December 1879 in the village. And in
1896 , at the age of sixteen, he had a death experience where he became aware of a
current or force which he recognized as his true "i" or self.
Maharshi approved a number of paths and practices but recommended self enquiry as the
principal means to remove ignorance and abide in self awareness.
According to him, self realization can be attainable through the practice of self enquiry.
Asking and searching to find true meaning and consciously identify.
True alignment of our aura unification of identity is to First know your Self; leave alone the
idea of teaching others. If the world and its people remain after your realisation, you may
teach them. Trying to help the world without knowing your Self will be just like a blind man
trying to treat the diseases in the eyes of others. First clear your own eyes.thats the recipe
he recommended. ' It does not matter how many thoughts arise. As each thought arises,
one should inquire with diligence, “To whom has this thought arisen?”. The answer that
would emerge would be “To me”. Thereupon if one inquires “Who am I?”, the mind will go
back to its source; and the thought that arose will become quiescent.
In November 1948, a tiny cancerous lump was found on Ramana Maharshi's arm
and was removed in February 1949 by the ashram's doctor. Soon, another growth
appeared, and another operation was performed by an eminent surgeon in March
1949 with radium applied. The doctor told Ramana Maharshi that a complete
amputation of the arm to the shoulder was required to save his life, but he refused.
Third and fourth operations were performed in August and December 1949, but
only weakened him. Other systems of medicine were then tried; all proved fruitless
and were stopped by the end of March when devotees gave up all hope. To
devotees who begged him to cure himself for the sake of his followers, Ramana
Maharshi is said to have replied, "Why are you so attached to this body? Let it go",
and "Where can I go? I am here."By April 1950, Ramana Maharshi was too weak to
go to the hall and visiting hours were limited. Visitors would file past the small room
where he spent his last days to get one final glimpse. He died on 14 April 1950 at
8:47 p.m.At the same time a shooting star was seen, which impressed some of his
devotees as a synchronicity .

Self awareness increases the frequency to succeed, to remain calm amidst turmoil
and undisputed limitations to vanish completely.
Many years of suffering and pain would be hampered if people realised power of
human spirit and will. Within thy self, if we would employ awareness and identity we
then can critically bring the world to it's knees . Breaking forces, rewriting history
and setting records.

What is worse than death is dying with unrealised self, potential and abilities. "They
say the richest place in the world is the grave yard, because of untapped
potential.les brown said,The graveyard is the richest place on earth, because it is
here that you will find all the hopes and dreams that were never fulfilled, the books
that were never written, the songs that were never sung, the inventions that were
never shared, the cures that were never discovered, all because someone was too
afraid to take that first step, keep with the problem, or determined to carry out their
dream." Most of challenges I have faced this far was because,I didn't know I was
and capable of doing. I should urge everyone to embark on this journey so that we
would claim our wealth buried six feet. Les further added,"Imagine being in your
deathbed, and standing around your bed is the ghost of the dreams, the ideas, the
abilities, the talent — given you by life, but you, for whatever, reason never pursued
those dreams." Was really scares me nowadays,is dying with tapping into my truest
expression,self and potential. This should be the greatest robbery to the history of
world and the greatest sin or crime ever witnessed.
Self awareness

"Sometimes people hold a core belief that is very strong. When they are
presented with evidence that works against that belief, the new
evidence cannot be accepted. It would create a feeling that is
extremely uncomfortable, called cognitive dissonance. And because it is so important to protect the
core belief, they will rationalize,
ignore and even deny anything that doesn't fit in with the core belief."

Sometimes , when presented with new ideas, it is hard to adapt because we usually want
comforting words that has for many years kept us crippled in the shackles of unused talents,
potential and soul. We might present you with tonnes of information or ground breaking revelation
but for thing you need to understand is that nothing can change unless you change .
Allowing new beliefs , systems of operations and conflicting ideas is the most inhaling point of life.
I'm not talking about ominism , but if you all want to view the world to have the same belief system
experienced or expressed in a different way, so be it ! It's not a cliche to say the truth is not found in
one place but in spectrum of colours. The truth we firmly believe in today was probably a piece of
joke to burst people's lungs at the circus years ago.
If we would look for answers inside us, we would find them . It is easy to believe what they say on
paper than our energies in our bodies that have lived for billions of years.
In quantum physics they say, our souls are transformed from one dimension to another dimensional
form. This is so because our bodies are made of energies that has always been in existence from
the first tiki of the clock to present date. You don't need to be a rocket scientist to understand the
golden law of energy. Energy can never be destroyed nor created but it can be transformed into
another form. That is precisely true to our body energies .
The subconscious mind doesn't live next door, it is much equally within us. Statistics say, we only
use about ninety five percent of our subconscious mind in our lives. Objective mind is a storage
house , it's powerful is beyond the central processing unit while the remaining ten percent is
conscious mind which is play a major role in thinking .
With this said, it shows that with so much information on the Wikipedia, technology advancement
and artificial intelligence which is currently claimed to be the threat to human life. It is still however,
almost impossible to compound the conscious mind percentage. If this is the key to open hidden
treasures, I beg to argue, they will be open enough to explain to us like a five year old child.
We are all humans beings with the same brain. No one has small or big brain, that's another
science that we cannot understand. We shouldn't dime or claim other people to be more intelligent
of less intelligent. So called IQ is another rocket science to grasp.
We are all equals, some people just have materials and equipment readily available ( media).
- [ ] If school was the center of human development, they would have taught us to be
self and align our aura chakras. Rhetorically no subject about subconscious mind and
it's nature, this should be the greatest development in the history our nation. It's funny
how information that would transform your life is hard to find on the internet, if you can't
find the information on social media platforms and you can't learn it in school. That
alone should alarm you.
- [ ] Growing up as a teenager, I have always be curious about learning new information
,skills that can catapult me as a person. While still in school, I was immersed about
college but as I begin seeing the big picture of self discovery has fascinating as a cubic
box .
- [ ] If the subconscious mind of objective mind is most important part of our brain, our
lives and everything in regard, we should been to it's cancerous peck of it.
- [ ] I'm not a brain surgeon or some historian reviling some unknown facts, but the good
news is that you don't be to be . If we would dig deep enough, we wouldn't marvel to it's
a revelation of it.
- [ ] Subs conscious mind is always active and operating , it is for this reason
autosuggestion has has proven it's magnified greatness. For years and years, as far as
I can remember , I have always spoken to myself and That has helped to talk to the
inner person who's presenting ear is that of the elephant. We would have listen to
ourselves a lot more our lives would have been ten times better, no room for whining ,
the point, I'm making is do that, at all cost. " sometimes the only word words you hear
are the words you tell yourself ," I always say, if you can make the tress your friend, you
can never be only.
- [ ] Self aware people are not selfish but selfless.it gives me so much joy and peace to
share this you you.
- [ ] In the world of social media and internet it's hard to be self, because we often feel
unappreciated or undeserving. My friends, you have hidden treasures inside you, you
have divine potential and power all baked inside your embodiment.
- [ ] One thing I can say fro sure, I can tell with extreme precision and confidence," man,
know thyself." This is the most important thing for a person. Forgive yourself for all the
wrong you have done for not knowing yourself, Your potential a little bit better. I'm a fan
of what Maya Angelou firmly said,"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know
better, I do better."
To drink from the cup of Gibran Khalil Gibran poem,"Do not love half lovers
Do not entertain half friends
Do not indulge in works of the half talented
Do not live half a life
and do not die a half death
If you choose silence, then be silent
When you speak, do so until you are finished
Do not silence yourself to say something
And do not speak to be silent
If you accept, then express it bluntly
Do not mask it
If you refuse then be clear about it
for an ambiguous refusal is but a weak acceptance
Do not accept half a solution
Do not believe half truths
Do not dream half a dream
Do not fantasize about half hopes
Half a drink will not quench your thirst
Half a meal will not satiate your hunger
Half the way will get you no where
Half an idea will bear you no results
Your other half is not the one you love
It is you in another time yet in the same space
It is you when you are not
Half a life is a life you didn't live,
A word you have not said
A smile you postponed
A love you have not had
A friendship you did not know
To reach and not arrive
Work and not work
Attend only to be absent
What makes you a stranger to them closest to you
and they strangers to you
The half is a mere moment of inability
but you are able for you are not half a being
You are a whole that exists to live a life
 CHAPTER TWO

I am undefinable. I don’t fit into any particular category

~ Rufus Wainwright

UNDEFINABLE

My all life ,I was told that I was dull and I have failed on countless times , I have led off so
many people.
I have done so many things I’m not proud of, I got drunk once, smoked once and store from
people. I skipped or dogged a lot of primary school classes.
No body knew me and I didn’t care to know anyone. I was in my own world, the world were
nothing mattered. I didn’t even knew about myself.
I was alone , I needed someone to help me, someone to lift me up, someone to hold my
hands,cheer on me, to pick me up but no one showed up.
I was undefined, I was a word without a meaning, an ocean without the waters and I body
without a soul. One thing remained, that was to leave my own body like a snake with it’s
shells!
I spent my all life admiring other people, I will look at their smile, nails and steps they took
while walking , I wanted to do just the same stuff. hate was my makeup and confusion was
my daily breath. Such expression is a bottomless pit or undefinable .
When I came across a word called Euthymia which means having our sense of our path and
how to stay on it without getting distracted by all the others that may intersect. That’s
according to Seneca in the book called the Ego is the Enemy by Ryan Holiday. My whole
trajectory changed.

You are undefined because no one has meaning for your life. You ought to make a choice,
what your life is really about. When you compare your life to others, you will never measure
up because everyone of us has a peculiar definition of he’s existence.
You may argue but I have come to understand that life on earth is undefined. It’s up to you
to find definition of your being! All great men that ever walked on the surface of the earth
know this assertion to be profound, it’s with this fact they went far to find definition to
undefined life by asking right question like who I’m are? What’s the purpose of my life and
so on!
For example the first man on earth created by God was undefined. I’m more than convinced
God wants us to be undefined.
 When you realize you are undefined, that’s a critical moment in the life of man . It’s like
adding colours to a dyes or adding flavour to a test-less meal. It’s like a magnet with it’s
magnetic power or abilities.
During this times, I found my truest self, the person that the world was waiting for. I’m still
undefined, it’s an endless Journey. I can’t wait, to see you embarking or riding on your
undefined terms.

Remy de Gourmont wouldn't say it any better,"t It is undefinable; and moreover, if it were
defined it would lose all its value. God is not all that exists; God is all that does not exist.
Therein resides the power & the charm of that mysterious word. God is tradition, God is
legend, God is folklore, God is a fairy-tale, God is romance, God is a lie, God is a bell, God
is a church window, God is religion, God is all that is absurd, useless, invisible, intangible,
all that is nothingness & that symbolizes nothingness. God is the nihil in tenebris-(nothing in
the darkness) -men have made of him light, life & love."

Time is the most undefinable yet paradoxical of things; the past is gone, the future is not
come, and the present becomes the past even while we attempt to define it, and, like the
flash of lightning, at once exists and expires, said by Charles Caleb Colton.
Anything that is defined is not beyond it's definition, You take away it's power, it's potential
and possibilities. A good example is a child who seemly do anything that feels right by
desperately reaching out, in all possible ways. It's almost convincingly true to say ,
everything is possible in their world, they can absolutely do everything. The challenges
comes in when will start setting up limitations or conditioning them on what lays on the their
bed of potential.
Children are philosophical beings, this is usually seen by the subconsciously asking
questions. Children who continue ask questions about things without societal contrast
because well esteem in our lifetime because this is not defined.
Everyone now is talking about living outside the box, but have you ever thought about it ,
who has kept us in a box in the first place? It's definition and limitations, ultimately. The
present condition is about, you can do this! You can't do that.
In fact every single technology in the twentieth first century would be unthinkable and
inconsistent in the 1800s or any date beyond that.

As far as I'm concerned , everything is possible, you can do absolutely anything if you put
your mind on it. This statement stressed out the capabilities wired in our bones and
muscles. It's about the power, the energy and vibrations that lays with our mind and body.
Man has managed look into the invisible to make visibility, this goes down to imagination
and auto suggestions. This revelation is unprecedented, profound and amiably ground
breaking.

I have seen and watched people making assertions like, this is out of this world! It's
unthinkable and magnificent. It's it occur to you, why do we even have such words? It
clearly shows we are living in glass ceilings created by status of the rigid society and it's
definitions.

I find it interesting that, we all unsoundly believe everything that has been given to us or
written on paper. There little to nothing ultimately change because it have walls of Jericho
to scrim up . Some of us have even gone far by saying," I have found the world this way
and there's nothing I can about it," on the contrary, there's something you can do and that's
living on the far side of pain.

Living in the present moment of the twenty first century, were the human undefinable had
been lowered down to the point of the television set . The word set at the end is not for
entertainment and advertising, it's about conformity in one big box that they are giving warn
signs to live out of it. Living in a comfort zone is ten times better than a person who has
been settled by a television box.
I'm trying to explain this to you like you are a five year old. You are undefined, your
potential is unlimited and unmeasurable by math or science.
In a recent video sadh guru was asked by very young boy who loudly said, "how to be like
sadh guru " and Sadh responded by saying ," you can not define possibilities, you can only
define dead things," definition is been crippled and imprisoned with self, he added.
When you define possible, you instantly set limitations and set the bar high to a level
where no one fry up even the eagle. You can't do this or it has never been said or done ,
such assertions are dreadful and should completely be erased in the vocabulary, obviously
not possible but you can do it because you are undefinable.

Just because we cannot see the invisible that, doesn't mean it's not there. There are so
many things that we cannot physically see with our eyes.
Mahatma Gandhi was categorically accurate when he said, "There is undefinable
mysterious power that pervades everything unlike so many things. " mathematics is
precise because it tells us that numbers are not the same and will be infinity
 CHAPTER THREE

THE PROBLEM IS NOT THE PROBLEM

We lost because we told ourselves we lost

~ Leo Tolstoy

problems doesn’t exist, it’s all in your mind. Albert Einstein once said, “nothing
is either good or bad, thinking makes it so . “
Problem can be defined as a state of difficulty that needs to be resolved. A
state is a level of thinking in the mind at a particular time.
When you say problem, it gives you one specific alternative which is , it can
not be done ,it’s impossible or it’s all over.

There’s no situations or turmoil that has one perspective , there are always
variables alternative; whether to quit or get up .
People need to understand that life is a probability . You opt to choose what
the true meaning of losing or winning .
I’m not trying to understate the hurdles of life , the difficult situations , the pain
, or the breaking seasons. I’m simply saying , no matter ,so called problems
you encounter , which I believe doesn’t exist , you have to open up yourself to
other alternatives or perspective ! Where there’s a will, there’s a way for me!
Including problems, if there are other choices, it’s an opportunity! If it teaches
you something new, it’s a break through.
What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger!
Hard times haven’t come to kill you but to skill you!
A two-time winner of the Stephen Leacock Medal for Humour, Terry Fallis is the
award-winning author of nineÿnational bestsellers, including his most recent,ÿA New
Season (2023),ÿHe is currently working on his tenth novel, likely to be released in
August 2025.
He once quoted,"A life without challenge, a life without hardship, a life without
purpose, seems pale and pointless. With challenge come perseverance and
gumption. With hardship come resilience and resolve. With purpose come strength
and understanding."
You need to employ faith, it makes impossible possible, it's about affirming what you
want to see. If it is in your head , that idea, it can become reality if you put faith into
action.
If you bounded by the limiting factors, you can not work in system of greatness. You can't
dance in cosmic hemisphere or influence the rhythm of the universal.
Going forward, especially this new year, you need to know that, a flesh start or new
beginning is not what you find or get, it's what you decide too. If you think you have
problems, you have big problems but if you think, the problem is not the problem, I have
good news for you, you don't have problems!
 CHAPTER FOUR

THE BLIND SIDE

When you stay in the dark for so long, you begin to see
~ Aaron Mutama

For decades now, you have probably heard motivational speakers, scholars and
philosophers emphasising the points ; be positive in life, predict your future,write down
your goals and plans if you were to actualise them .
But let’s face it, writing your goals down doesn’t make them happen.by virtual of your
thinking positively about your dreams, it doesn’t actually come to pass .
In my view and close analysis, all that is just the quick fix, temporary solutions and in it’s
larger context, it’s running away from your reality. By so doing, you are denying the
ultimate cause.

When I was in my final grade in high school. Reading different books and having
listened to variety of motivational speakers, I was positive and I had written down few
goals, this seemed to pretty good work in the process, I worked so hard every day, took
extra classes after school and burnt The midnight oil but when the results were
announced, after undertaking exams, it was not what i envision and wrote down. I can
say , life hit me at my blind side. I was crashed , disappointed and hammered by life. A
day seemed like a billion years.This is what Frankl called Delusion of reprieved , were
the condemned man , immediately before his execution, gets the illusion that he might
be reprieve at the last minute. I wanted to change the facts before my face, unlike all
difficult times, I wouldn't.Stoicism was the right channel to redirect , rethink and refocus
on things I can change.

The Serenity prayer was pivotal during the times of what I call inner Turmoil;
"God grant me the serenity to accept things I can’t change, courage to change things I
can and give me the wisdom to know the difference between the two."
My quest is to let you know, the best way you can prepare for the inevitable
predicament.
Many people spend so much of their time running away from the truth . Life shouldn’t
find you off guard.
It’s not a cliche to say, life will hit you when you least expect. This is exactly my problem
, life should not hit you when you always prepare for it .
You and I , can’t possibly change the future but we all have the present to face, to live ,
to learn and to grow.
In this context, what happens, happens. We can’t dark it by only seeing what we want,
see all possibilities and the ultimate worse and grow from them.
The blind side is real when people say, I didn’t see it coming. You have obviously
heard them saying, don’t create worst possible scenarios but that is undeniable cure
for most mental and emotional distress.
Warriors, shouldn’t be caught off guard at any moment.
Life is unforeseeable war, you can never tell from which angle, life will slap your face
with a brick but the least we can do is prepare for it.
The soldiers are a good example. They spent everyday training with extreme
coldness and hotness or even rainy seasons . They prepare for unforeseen battle
with optimism, they build muscle for it . Knowing the fact that war or life will hit but not
on the blind side .

Sometimes, the blind side are situations you leave unattended to,there are many
things that need your particular attention but you live aside.
We oftentimes make so much excuses, for years my excuse was I'm not too
intelligent enough,I don't have a caring father or I don't have rich family to support me
. These are valid reasons, but much to our disappointment, there are not sustainable.
You need to take ownership of your life , you need to take full responsibility. We
can't absolutely wait and sit back nurse our wounds.
There is no reason to validate why can't live your life to the fullest potential, why you
can't chase your dreams or goals, not even the sky is the limit. Rationally speaking,
we often comprise and settle for less. Nelson Mandela said, " There is no passion to
be found playing small - in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable
of living."
The blind side, is your dreams you abandoned , goals you gave up on . I know it has
been hard lately, sleepless nights , loneliness and darkness creeps in, but in this
moment the most important thing is doing what you need to do for the life you have
always wanted.
The easy thing for most of us is to quit, to give up on your dreams and aspirations.
We chose to entertain the negative dialogue inside our mind, that has been playing
the music of self sabotage. You have rather taken the easy way out , nothing
sustainable is easy , ask anybody who has made it big, they will tell you, it ain't easy
at all , it's the burning desire to continue that catapult into elevation of greatness.
Sometimes, the blind side are situations you leave unattended to,there are many things that need
your particular attention but you live aside.
We oftentimes make so much excuses, for years my excuse was I'm not too intelligent enough,I
don't have a caring father or I don't have rich family to support me . These are valid reasons, but
much to our disappointment, there are not sustainable. You need to take ownership of your life ,
you need to take full responsibility. We can't absolutely wait and sit back nurse our wounds.
There is no reason to validate why can't live your life to the fullest potential, why you can't chase
your dreams or goals, not even the sky is the limit. Rationally speaking, we often comprise and
settle for less. Nelson Mandela said, " There is no passion to be found playing small - in settling
for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living."

The blind side, is your dreams you abandoned , goals you gave up on . I know it has been hard
lately, sleepless nights , loneliness and darkness creeps in, but in this moment the most important
thing is doing what you need to do for the life you have always wanted.
The easy thing for most of us is to quit, to give up on your dreams and aspirations. We chose to
entertain the negative dialogue inside our mind, that has been playing the music of self sabotage.
You have rather taken the easy way out , nothing sustainable is easy , ask anybody who has
made it big, they will tell you, it ain't easy at all , it's the burning desire to continue that catapult into
elevation of greatness.

One day a kid came to me , and said ," I want to be just like you," you don't know man , how much
you inspires me, what can I do to be just like you, the kid continued.
While looking at the kid with adoration and enthusiasm I said , the hardest thing that I have ever
was to be me. It's hard to be like and I don't think you will ever be because you are you. There are
many areas I'm constantly trying to develop.
In the bizarre state the kid said, what do you mean ? I said, your inspiration which is learning from
other people is a great skill not just as a person but also as a leader. I'm very much delighted and
grateful that you are looking up to me .

I was more than convinced, the kid did not quite understand everything I said but I can only hope
he definitely understand this important point. This is not just about the kid but to each and
everyone of us , we cannot lobby of the world the quintessential reality of life by tying to imitate
other people's steps.
The blind side, is seeking other people's validation and solace before we finally go after our
dreams. Life is like an egg once you take of it grow and mature into a bird. Seeking validation is
breaking the egg to hatch
 Les brown says, "don't let people's opinions determine you life."
Great leaders are those who have accepted their flaws publicly and to
themselves. While this may seem as a sign of weakness but actually is were
strength resides.
The blind side is making mistakes but failing to take full responsibility what you
have done. By this point you must now know that making mistakes as learning
guides to success, most especially if we can open our eyes wide enough for
something big.

The blind side is your ego, when you think you are the most important person in
the room . When you think everything is or should be about you and your needs
and wants. That's when self sabotage comes in, creativity almost goes away and
we instead to do even despicable things just to please the crowds.
The more powerful a person is the most blinded they become to the true. It's
worse than digging ones grave and writing ones tombstone farewell message.
You need to know and acerbically believe that , it's not always about you!
Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.
Leo Tolstoy

The blind side is inclining to your past life, many people are bound to doom in
under ground house of hitler because of failing to move on with their lives or
anything that doesn't appreciate fully who they really are. What happened, are
happened. We can't change the past but can take credible reasons from it. Our
power lays in the present moment not the past or the future.knowing this will
propel us to greater , it will bring us close to realistic link our words with action.
Don't live in clashed realities, instead take action today and change your world for
ever.
Many of us are captives in our minds. We are full of hurt , jealous, bitterness and
resentment. These are pollutants of soul and killer of dreams. We all make terrible
mistakes sometimes but we need to forgive ourselves for things we didn't know.
We need to set ourselves free from all the boundaries that have limited our lives.
There's no place I can guarantee you to find true peace, it all resides inside of
each and everyone of us.
Now that you know, real work is on the blind side. Things you can change,
change them! Things you can make peace with, do ! The mistakes you made,
forgive yourself. Most importantly, prepare for the inevitable . Things don't just
happen, they were meant to be. Nothing can happen to us which is negative.
When fail, pick yourself up and keep walking. The sweetest victory comes after
failing a dozen times.
The task you abandoned, the dreams you buried, the love , you gave up on and
every other thing you left untouched or needs your attention, it means you are
been hit on your blind side.
Your perspective is everything , you need to see all angles of any situation
at hand.the problem is that we are often times too focused on one side of
coin, it would be good or bad, negative or positive.
The goal is to view both sides, you can't dark it or hid under the rock.
What you tolerate is what kills you. We have been conditioned to always be
positive in life such that when inevitable happens , when the darkness
creeps in, we become wrecked, miserable and devastated. We need to see
the world has it is . If you win, congratulations, if you loss , you have learnt,
try harder next time.
The universe rides on both sides of the coin.
 CHAPTER FIVE

IMAGINATION

we suffer more often in imagination than in reality

~ Seneca

Albert Einstein said, imagination is everything, it's a preview to life coming attractions.
He further, added, neither is anything Good nor bad ,thinking makes it so !

"As the man think , so is he. "The greatest discovery in mankind is Man's ability to think
and reason cognitively.
Most problems or inner turmoil we encounter is in our mind!
According Merriam Webster, imagination can be defined as the act or power of forming a
mental image of something not present to the senses or never before wholly perceived
in reality.
I can say, it's simply, creating mental realities in the present moment,otherwise not true
but attainable.
The law of manifestation states that thoughts and feelings create our realist. What we
dwell on becomes our dwelling place. We instantly became what we think about day
long.

What governs the law of attraction is attracting, creating and allowing, that's exactly what
happens when we create our imaginary world.
This may sound too nice to be true but we can attract a person by the very act of
thinking about them on several occasions.
Our friends in the business world, knows this assertion to be the guiding principle .
Vincent Norman Peale , in this book Think and Grow Rich,the sixth Chapter, He said , "
The imagination is literally the workshop wherein are fashioned all plans created by men
. The impulse, the desire ,is given shape ,form and action through the aid of the
imagination faculty of the mind.
Charles Manson was convicted for first degree murder(7 counts) and conspiracy to
commit Murder. His eyes and face , would scare you. Why talking about him, well, I
believe everyone has the right to say and to be heard. During an interview he was
quoted saying, " The Mind is the endless. You put me in a dark solitary ceil,and to you
that's the end, to me it's the beginning , it's the universe in there,there's a world in there,
and I'm free.
There's no place that can lock, limit or confine your mind unless you permit it. I
love the story that Les brown shared to his audience of Young boy who was
bullied in a school bus.The bully Boys said ,sit down while the young boy
hesitantly refusing to seat. He was finally seated down, he looked at them and
said, you may seat me down but in my mind , I'm standing! Records have been
broken, history changed ,unmoved moved because of our mind . The gravity of
imagination obeys no any gravitational force. Mahatma Gandhi the first President
of India , said, after facing jail sentences fighting the British colonist, you can chain
me , you can even destroy this body,but you will never prison my mind. John
Milton , added, The Mind is it's own place and in itself- can make a heaven of hell,
a hell of heaven.
You may keep me in prison , but in my mind I'm free and undulating like a bird
coming from the cage.
The only entity and breaking of the human spirit by the verge of thinking is your
imagination.
Scientists after close analysis stated, it was impossible for metals to fly however, how
many planes do we have ? This would be funny, but what changed? It's the thinking, the
endless possibilities of our faculty of imagination.
I remember one moment when I was facing a difficult time. My imaginary world crashed
with my reality. I was drained and discouraged. I went over months anguishing and I
wouldn't even want to get of bed. When you are in that state nothing makes sense, you
can't socialize , you can't eat, you just have all the time in the world to think about how
complex your hurdles are . It's like been in Hitlers burning Chambers.

The extremity happened when i was in my twelve grade. We had a bad time preparing
for exams because all schools and world completely went on a lockdown due to the
Covid pandemic! I was not technically prepared for the exams and I didn't want to fail,
later on disappoint my family. In my imagination, it was already over and I panicked. The
situation was bad to the point I wanted to commit suicide. Such negative thoughts are
usually inevitable when you imaginary world comes into close contact with what is true.
Death becomes a temporary solution to the long accrued crashed realists. such
experiences are like Muhammad Ali knockout! Many have failed to ever stand on their
feet again and are burred six feet underneath.

When you have crashed reality, you can't seemly distinguish what is real from fake and
that's what makes the prevailing predicament daunting. During this process, you will
lose weight, self confidence and desire to live.
For me , I have always been reserved with my emotions, shying away from talking about
them but barely breathing from inside.Mostly in my option, the most meanest things
people do is always backed up and suppressed in their imaginary crashed realities.
Publicly out going and happy people, are often the most unhappy people on earth in
their closed doors. I was always energetic, outgoing and confident as I have always
been but deep down, my soul was immensely in the clouds of rains.
Sigmond fuel said, " when we suppress our feelings it comes out in more urge ways. I
find this statement to be profound.
Ones live become a piece of stone to be thrown unto thy sea. Alive but mentally
dead.
I'm not in the state to say clearly, what I was going through because I'm not a
neurologist or a psychologist, maybe, I was afraid or maybe, I was nervous but one
thing I know for sure , it's the power of mind or imagination expressed in the most
havoc ways!

I was in paralysis, wouldn't study or concentrate in class because I failed my exams

in my mind .I was in turmoil and nearly would have ended my own life. It's
unthinkable , how we often take life so likely .
All the discoveries , inventions, sports and cognitive up thrust is in power of the
mind.our mind doesn't know what is real and fate . To live a fulfilled life, you need to
know and separate facts from fiction.
The chapter of the mind or imagination is not the one I can address in one setting
or has ever been. In my subsequent chapter the topic is still mentioned because of
it imperative nature.

I talked about Viktor Frankl an Australian psychiatrist and a holocaust survivor,who

founded Logotheraphy that describes a search for life meaning!! He sad , "life
ultimately means taking the responsibility to find the right answers to it's problems
and to fulfill the task which it constantly sets for each individual." Many people dead
during holocaust because they lost a sense of meaning in life . Seemly saying life is
nothing and meaningless like the nihilists. The mentality complexity crashed and
death was the easy thing to do. People would rather run through the wire or smoke
their cigarette than to get back to the working field or imagistic fallen kingdom.
In the other chapter we stated that, problems don't exist , is all the state of the mind.
We further added, A state of mind is the faculty of imaginary persecution we create.
There is something about the human spirit, that transcend adversity. Challenges
are often bigger than they actually are because we give in to the negative voice at
the back of head, saying, it's all over , you tryed and it didn't work, now is the time
to quit.
Some years back, in 2015, I wouldn't read and write. This means I wouldn't even
pronounce basic English. Everyone in my family believed that I was mentally
incapacitated because from my first grade to the seventh grade I had failed all my
classes. I was confused and I was constantly trying to find solutions to my
predicament.
After failing my primary exams, I dropped out of school. I was lost, I would have find myself
in jail or addicted to drugs.My best friend at that time is now an addict and he's future is
compromised.
Ramana , who we discussed in chapter one said, Mind is consciousnesses which has put
on limitations. " You are originally unlimited and perfect. Later you take on limitations and
become the mind.
After a year and half, I was take back to school by my grandmother shortly after my Uncle
dead after an illness. She is first to have seen something in me . Grandma, gave me a
second chance. A chance to Dream , a chance to hope and a chance to believe again.
She was the reason, I would get up early in the morning. If she was sick, I would be sick
too.
I was ashamed of myself, and I completely separated myself from friends for years just to
navigate through this times of turmoil.
With so much done and too many sacrifices to offer, I didn't have a breakthrough, I
continued failing, it was hard but I kept going.
When I changed my mental faculties, everything changed. In one year, I was able to read ,
write and speak eloquently. I was a laughing stock and for this , I became a shareholder of
my life .
William Ernest Henley (1849–1903) penned the words of his immortal Invictus
(unconquered in Latin) after years of painful tuberculosis (TB) infection of his bones,
eventually losing his leg to the disease.
During his lifetime Henley had become fairly well known as a poet. His poetry had even
made its way to the United States, inspiring several different contributors from across the
country to pen articles about him
 In 1889 the Chicago Daily Tribune ran an article about the promise that Henley showed in the
field of poetry.After Henley's death in 1903 an acquaintance in Boston wrote a piece about her
impression of Henley, saying of him, "There was in him something more than the patient
resignation of the religious sufferer, who had bowed himself to the uses of adversity. Deep in his
nature lay an inner well of cheerfulness, and a spontaneous joy of living, that nothing could drain
dry, though it dwindled sadly after the crowning affliction of his little daughter's death."Henley
was known as a man of inner resolve and character that transferred into his works, but also
made an impression on his peers and friends. The loss of his daughter was a deeply
traumatising event in Henley's life but did not truly dampen his outlook on life as a whole.
While it has been observed that Henley's poetry "almost fell into undeserved oblivion," the
appearance of "Invictus " as a continuing popular reference and the renewed availability of his
work, through online databases and archives have meant that Henley's significant influence on
culture and literary perspectives in the late-Victorian period is not forgotten.

In his poem, which has gone down in history, shaped sophisticated mind of time and sign of hope
to them that believe. He said , in the poem invictus :
Out of the night that covers me,
ÿ Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
ÿ For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

ÿ I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
ÿ My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

ÿ Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
ÿ Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

ÿ How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
ÿ I am the captain of my soul.
The statement , "I am the master of my fate , I am the captain of my soul." Is profound to
me and affirmatively my light under my pathway.
In his book, The Science Of Mind, Holmes explains how it is possible to direct this power by
controlling one's thoughts. A sustained belief in a particular outcome will invariably create
that outcome. In other words, good events proceed from a belief in good. Evil events
proceed from a belief in evil. In The Science of Mind, Holmes emphasized the importance
of only focusing on good:
Never look at that which you do not wish to experience. No matter what the false condition
may be, it must be refuted. The proper kind of denial is based upon the recognition that, in
reality, there is no limitation, for Mind can as easily make a planet as an acorn. The Infinite
knows no difference between a million dollars and a penny. It only knows it is .
Few months, I was on top of my class and I had my first leadership position of prefect then.
I believe, God or what you dime to be greater powers, lead me through the fire to burning
into the fames of under graduating power of imagination.
Your imagination can take you places and can definitely close all mentaller doors. If used
properly, your imagination is tool you can use to defy all odds and set up on a hill of
success or financial freedom. Used in the negative way , your story has ended before you
even began.
We suffer more in imagination than in reality because we have been conditioned that way
the society, media and by certain cultural values or simply by the story we continuously tell
ourselves.
For over 400 years, more than 15 million men, women and children were the victims of
brutal physical punishment, psychological abuse and endless hours of hard labour
without compensation in Africa , one of ruthless and darkest chapters in the human
history . The prevailing predicament went on for 250 years without a complete
success. Enhance, the need to develop other dreadful tactics. Method introduced
were Mentally inclined , commonly called making of the slave. I will not talk about
them in details but our ancestors were untamable and damaged to choice to be
unbridled .
In so saying, this summaries, once you give your mind to fear, distrust,envy and
inferiority complexity, you kill the human spirit.
You can't kill the human spirit or imagination unless you tab yourself.
 CHAPTER SEVEN

ACCEPTANCE

Every difficulty in life presents us with an opportunity to turn inward and to invoke our
own submerged inner resources. The trials we endure can and should introduce us to our
strengths.
~ Epictetus

Acceptance is making peace with infinitive challenges of life and self.

Acceptance is the most important aspect of life. Because it allows the mind to think critically
for greater good and self introspection.
To accept doesn't mean it doesn't hurt or it hasn't yet destroyed your life. We all go through
hurdles in life, you might have failed your exams, just like me or lost a beloved one ,
disappointed by the people you truly trust, that you can put your own life at cross for them ,
Life is uncertain and the uncertainty happens.
To live in denial or not accepting flaws creates depression,anxiety and fear. To do
everything in life we need acceptance , to acknowledge both our failure and achievements
as part of process to success. Going that is what propels us to greater heights.
If we all lived in the world were everything was right or happening to our will, it would have
been mean-less and unprintable world.
Acceptance is not the sign of weakness but strength.
In Stoicism, an ancient philosophy , emphasis accepting what we cannot control and focusing
our energy to what we can control. That's a golden principle in stoics.
I might have share with you already about the serenity prayer,Reinhold Niebuhr wrote the
original version of the serenity prayer that reads: “O God and Heavenly Father, grant to us the
serenity of mind to accept that which cannot be changed, courage to change that which can be
changed, and wisdom to know the one from the other through Jesus Christ, our Lord, Amen.”
Oftentimes, when we are gripping with difficulties and challenges, we start looking for
opportunities to complain and give ourselves excuses.
 DANGERS OF NOT ACCEPTING

We cannot change the past but we can learn from it and draw upon profound lessons .
1. Energy is drained: when you fail to accept the most inevitable circumstances, it would be the loss of
a job , lover or divorced. Failure to accept doubles the pain. It destroys and take away your power you
need to solve the very challenges.

2. You will be discouraged:living in denial or failure to accept all issues that negatively effect our lives
leads to discouragement. You probably start thinking about every single investment you made as
worthless.

3. This usually happens when we encounter tdisappointment. a temporary defeats or loss. I remember
vividly like it's yesterday ,when my uncle dead in 2015, he was like a father figure to me, he taught me
variable lessons in tough way because he was very strict. I wouldn't believe and I didn't want to believe
, life was unbearable and I wished, I would wake up the following day only to find everything that just
happened was a nightmare and that ,worsen my burden, it was like carrying the weight of the world on
my shoulders.when he dead , something in me also dead , he took part of me . I was devastated. It
was my first time losing someone who I adore and close with in that manner. It's astounding seeing
how older people view death,like it's a normal occurrence and for sure it is inevitable but I was in
complete agony.

4. Loss of purpose :accepting unforeseen circumstances makes it earlier for us to keep moving
forward. Purpose is about what I'm doing to make a difference for others people . Once we mistakenly
fail to accept fate , we miss the sense of purpose, the component of purpose such as faith and hope is
all in the dire situation.
5. It undermines your work: you need to accept your flaws, mistakes to be able to improve as the
person. You don't learn from denial but from what you accept.
In the 1920s, a journalist asked Thomas Edison how it felt to fail 1000 times in his attempt to
invent the incandescent lightbulb. He replied, “I didn't fail 1000 times. The lightbulb was an
invention with 1000 steps.”this is it , you need to accept your flaws and see them as
opportunities to unleash your potential. Don't just accept but love it , that's the blue print of
your life.

Failing to accept your flaws, undermines your ability to perform your task at hand .
6. Worst of time: Time is most important aspect of the human life. Life in general is
scrutinized in time . Your ability to make a difference or impact the world is within the space
of time. We are never guaranteed or have an assurance of tomorrow possibilities.
Oliver Wendell Holmes: "Many people die with their music still in them. Why is this so? Too
often it is because they are always getting ready to live. Before they know it, time runs out."
On the tombstone, there two dates, the day you were born and a day your will inevitably die.
The possibility of life span is the dash in between dates. Frankl ,says , is not what we expect
from life but what life expect from us .

It's What we do with what is at stake that matters and the most importantly, you don't want to
spend the dash of your life whining, stresses and agonizing about what would or what
wouldn't have happened. You have come into terms with reality and accept difficulties. "
Nothing is ever achieved by holding back. If you want to carve your destiny, you've got to
seize the day! Carpe diem!"
There is a word that stoic believe in, which is critically in Latin , called, Amori Fati , which
means the love of fate . It is used to describe an attitude in which one sees everything that
happens in ones life as an opportunity including suffering and loss , as good or at least,
necessary.

Amori Fati is often associated with what Friedrich Nietzsche called eternal recurrence, the
idea that, over an infinite period of time, everything recurs infinitely. from this he developed a
desire to be wiling to live exactly the same life over and over for all eternity (" long for nothing
fervently than this ultimate eternal confirmation and sea.") furthering his point he said in Ecco
Homo, my formula for greatness in a human being is Amor Fati ; that one wants nothing to be
different, no forward, not backward, not all eternity.not merely to bear what is necessary, still
less conceal it but love it .
Nietzsche said from his work twilight of the idols , " what doesn't kill you makes you stronger."
Even 1800 years before Nietzsche, Greek philosopher Epictetus , showed signs this thinking.
When he quoted from the eighth chapter of his Enchiridian , " Do not seek for things to
happen the way you want them to, rather, wish that what happens ; then you will be happy."
Nothing can happens to us which is not possible.all things work for good to them that accept
all things.
 CHAPTER EIGHT

FAILURE IS SUCCESS

“Develop success from failures. Discouragement and

failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success.”
—Dale Carnegie

Born in 1906, Soichiro Honda was a Japanese inventor and industrialist who created the
automotive empire by his namesake — Honda Motor Company. However, while Honda’s
company has certainly grown to rival even that of Toyota, Honda’s earliest days were
anything but easy. Yet, it was his perseverance and his tenacity to never give up that
kept him going and helped him to ultimately succeed.
Without any formal education to his name, at the age of 15-years old, Honda left home to
head for Tokyo to search for work, which he later found at an auto repair shop where he
apprenticed and worked for the next 6 years before returning home to open up his own
automotive shop.
During the Great Depression, inÿ1937, at the age of 31-years old, he founded, Tōkai Seiki
to create piston rings for Toyota. He toiled and labored night and day to create these, but
to no avail. With little cash and bleak chances for survival, he had to pawn his wife’s ring
just to make ends meet. He failed ultimately, and was told that the rings didn’t meet
Toyota’s specifications.
However, he refused to give up. He went back to school and continued to search for
ways to improve upon his prior designs. Eventually, after two more years of designing
and trying, he succeeded and successfully secured a contract with Toyota to create the
piston rings.
But shortly thereafter, his factory that he built to build the products was hit by a bomb
during WWII when a B-29 bomber run carpeted the area. After he rebuilt the factory a
second time, an earthquake leveled it. But he refused to give up. Instead, he created a
motorized bicycle that would become the start of the Honda motorcycle. What is your
excuse? What is stopping you? Success is easy but failure is hard. And there's no
success without failure. No chemistry technique can separate failure from success.
Everyone has the courage to win or make it but do you have the zeal to fail, to start from
scratch. I am no way to success without my failures. If you think about it more deeply,
success gets boring however, trying, getting up and loss is what makes life meaningful
and of amass purpose.
Born in 1874, Winston Churchill is famously known as being the Prime Minister of the United
Kingdom from October 26th, 1951 through April 6th, 1955, and is often credited with several very
popular quotes about failure such as “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to
continue that counts,” and, “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of
enthusiasm.”
In 1893, Churchill applied to attend the Royal Military College in Sandhurst. He failed that exam 2
times, and on the third try, he succeeded, but only after changing from the infantry division to the
cavalry division, which had a lower threshold for entrance. However, he excelled during his tenure
there.
During his political career, he lost a total of 5 elections, including his very first one, which included
three elections in a row during the years of 1922 through 1924. Throughout his life, he battled
clinical depression. He also had a severe lateral lisp, and had trouble speaking and making
speeches at times, having dentures manufactured to help repair the impediments his speech
caused.
However, Churchill was also one of the most successful and renowned politicians to have ever
lived.
Thomas Edison is an American inventor and entrepreneur born in 1847 in Milan, Ohio, one of
seven siblings in a very large family. Edison was home schooled by his mother and developed
hearing problems early on in life. He was trained to use the telegraph after a train almost struck the
son of a station agent who was so grateful that he taught Edison how to use the system, eventually
leading to a job working for Western Union.
In 1877, at the age of 30-years old, Edison invented the phonograph, an invention that
was so magical that it made the public dub him with the name “The Wizard of Menlo
Park.” In 1878, just a year later, Edison began working on a commercially-viable
incandescent lightbulb that would be both long-lasting and highly efficient by not
drawing too much energy to operate.
Thomas Edison went through thousands of iterations to make this dream a reality. In
fact, he failed over 10,000 times trying to invent a commercially-viable electric bulb. At
one point, when asked by a reporter whether he felt like a failure after so many failed
attempts. He said, “I have not failed 10,000 times. I have not failed once. I have
succeeded in proving that those 10,000 ways will not work. When I have eliminated the
ways that will not work, I will find the way that will work.”
Edison had a huge impact on society, holding 1,093 patents to his name at the time of
his death. His work in a number of fields created the basis for much of the technologies
that we enjoy today and take for granted. However, like anyone else, he suffered
through failure numerous time, but where others quit, he persisted.

What more do you need, no more stories, time and again, I have told you how I failed
my primary school exam , wouldn't read and write, one year half of shame and without
association. I want through depression, suicidal thoughts and self hatred. Found myself
in an accident that left my face with a scar that will probably never heal .
I was neglected by biological father, my Mother was a teenager, wouldn't take of me, so
I was left to be raised by my widow mother without a proper job.
I was given an form of incentive or pocket money, I had beg from other kids and
sometimes steal.people turn me down, lost so many opportunities because i never had
someone to support.
Hadn't I been through everything , I wouldn't be the young man as I, I wouldn't the junior
mayor, I wouldn't Vice Head Boy , I wouldn't be Young minister of the Gospel, it's the
hardest of time that makes success, it's excruciating pain that makes strong.
I still face difficulties, but I can't break because I have been broken before. If you walk
out of my life, I wouldn't be surprised, I have be left before. Everything we go through is
part of the process, there's no product without productions.
If failure is not success, I don't know what it is. And guess what, I don't wanna know. I also have
numerous reports of success but that can't be measurable to one report of failure.
In schools, they determine failure and success according to grades but it's that the accuracy of
measurement? If that was true , I don't have a place in this world, I don't have a say . I have shared
countless of my stories and other people who failed to success, that's more than evidence beyond
reasonable doubts. Show me a man who is successful but haven't failed, show me a man who had
more failures and is not successful? Even people who were born with a silver spoon in their mouths
, or have inherited massive wealth lost it because they wouldn't sustain it without the reasons of
experience or failure.

This disagrees with everything you probably know or think of , yes!! Who defines failure? Who
defines success?
If you haven't failed you haven't learnt. After I was unfairly disqualified in history preparation by the
judges after securing a first position, by teachers were furious about the verdict and did almost
everything to turn the ruling but without positive feedback. A kid who I had helped and meet during
the trials, Come to me with absolutely excitement in his eyes, Aaron, did you win? He asked, how
did it go? I confidently said, I didn't win, but I have learnt. We fail because we told ourselves that we
have.

To haves success, to must be willing to ask and learn from failure. Everybody wants to win, but not
wants to win. It's like the marine saying, "everyone wants to go to heaven ,but no one wants to die
to get there." The price for success is failure, if you can't pay it, there are no two ways about it. I'm
sorry, we cannot trust you to sustain it.
 CHAPTER NINE

CRY LIKE A CHILD

Crying is never a symbol of weakness. For the time we are born,

it has always been a sign that we are alive
~Unknown

Carl August Sandburg was an American poet, biographer, journalist, and editor.
He won three Pulitzer Prizes. two for his poetry and one for his biography of
Abraham Lincoln .During his lifetime, Sandburg was widely regarded as "a major
figure in contemporary literature."
Carl quoted, "Life is like an onion. You peel it off one layer at a time, and
sometimes you weep." That's a human response.
Have you ever cried before? Well, quite a simple question, a big YES! Most of
you can't even count, I cannot personally count myself.
It's not a cliche in African tradition or any modern society. We have heard of the
saying, "Mens don't cry," be like a man , men don't cry like a two old girl crying
for candy!
I'm more than convinced by now, you should understand the principles of dealing
with pain and turmoil.
Glowing up , we believed, you cannot win a fight with a crying fighter . Finding yourself in that
situation was not only difficult but also unforgettable defeat.
Most of talents, skills and art were developed in the dark during turmoil or difficult times.
We must have a courage to be different,the courage to express ourselves, to be who we
automatically are , regardless of the circumstances,situations or hurdles.
I have said time again and again that, we are not determined by anything above or below, it's
what we make of it.

I'm not in any way saying, let's all march while crying, how ironic. All I'm saying is the importance
of channelling our pain into action.
You can bring philosophy or strategies but nothing will change until you take action. That I can
promise you!

Let every moment that shaped your life especially pain or difficult times propel you to your
unmatched greatness. You have everything you need inside your. Strength, greatness and
abilities all lay within the the inclosed doors of individualism.
my truest expression is speaking , writing and poetry. People don't realise these are merely
expressions of millions of tears. For them , they hear music or fine art not pain. Let your tears
water your seeds of greatness and lift the burden of your hearts.I don't care if it takes you
thousands of years, so long you don't stop. You will be remarkable in the whole universe and
history of the world.This chapter is not only about physical crying, while it may introduce you to
this chapter. The chapter is taking action after everything had happened to you. Pick yourself up ,
grab the dust , whip the teardrops away and start moving. What happens happens it's me to keep
moving forward .you are not crying to quit but to conquer , to fight back like a roaring lion.

This time around, some teardrops are on the ground, it's not doing to be the same ,it will be a dog
fight. I'm not the only one who has been hurt or abandoned by my biological father, people have
gone through the deep of the tunnel already . Taylor Swift said,"If somebody hurts you, it’s okay to
cry a river, just remember to build a bridge and get over it."
 CHAPTER TEN

HEALTHY SOUL

Healing takes courage, and we all have courage,

even if we have to dig a little to find it.
~ Tori Amos

Anita Moorjani is the Author of five books, including the the New York Bestseller, "Dying to
be me."
Anita Moorjani At age 43, Anita Moorjani found a lump on her left shoulder. She was
diagnosed with lymphoma, a cancer of the lymphatic system. At the time of her diagnosis,
both her best friend and brother-in-law were suffering from
cancer, and Anita was watching them deteriorate while going through chemotherapy. Soon,
they both passed away.

Anita began to explore all methods of alternative healing that she could find. She tried
hypnotherapy, meditation, prayer, chanting, and Chinese herbal remedies. Eventually she
quit working and traveled to India to follow the healing systems of ayurveda and yoga. After
six months in India, both she and her yoga master felt that she had healed.

Upon returning home to Hong Kong, some friends expressed doubt that she could have
gotten better, and their opinions made Anita doubt her recovery. She became confused about
the differences between ayurveda, Traditional Chinese Medicine, and Western naturopathic
systems. Stress, confusion, and fear overtook her, and her health deteriorated rapidly.
Soon, Anita was in and out of the hospital for blood transfusions. Her cancer spread
throughout her lymphatic system, and it was too late for chemotherapy . . her doctors
informed her and her family that it was "too late" to save her life. The lymphoma had spread
throughout her body and had metastasized. At that point, all of Moorjani's organs had shut
down, and she entered into a coma.
Moorjani came out of the coma 30 hours later. During those 30 hours, Moorjani asserts that she
experienced many characteristic details of a near death experience Her doctor gave her three
months to live. The doctors told Anita’s husband that she had tumors the size of lemons
throughout her lymphatic system, her brain and lungs were filled with fluid, and her organs had
shut down. She was not going to make it through the night.

Though her eyes were closed and she appeared to be in a comatose state, Anita was acutely
aware of everything that was going on. She could hear and see a conversation taking place
between her husband and her doctor, even though it was happening outside the ICU, 40 feet
down the hallway. She knew that her brother was boarding a plane thousands of miles away to
come see her. She also knew that if she chose to return to her life, that she would experience a
full recovery.

On the afternoon of February 3rd, 30 hours after slipping into a coma, Anita opened her eyes. Her
doctor relayed the news that her organs had begun to function again. Over the coming weeks,
Anita’s cancer completely disappeared. Her miraculous recovery has been medically documented,
and she was featured in the documentary 'Heal.'
According to one article, oncologist hematologist T.K. Chan, who treated Moorjani at the critical
stage of her illness, ascribed her recovery to the draining of her lungs carried out by medical
specialists after she was admitted to hospital, followed by chemotherapy which she had refused
for four years. Chan stated, "with lymphoma, it's never too late" and "Hodgkin's disease is quite
curable... it can have a dramatic response to chemotherapy".

On the same article, oncologist Peter Ko, who arranged to see Moorjani and all her medical
records on a visit in November 2006, declared that chemotherapy could not have occasioned
such a dramatic recovery, and also that it could have been highly toxic, considering the state of
her failing organs. Ko stated, "either her mind or body was able to send a message to the cancer
cells to turn off the mutated genes" and "chemotherapy does work well with Hodgkin's, but I've
never seen it work like this".

If we would search in and draw upon the power of the mind, we wouldn't even get sick. Our bodies
are built differently, we have somewhat become weaker than our ancestors. If we can dig deep,
we then can realise the ability of body we cure it self.
Hippocrates said,"Healing is a matter of time, but it is sometimes also a matter of
opportunity."
It becomes an opportunity because, it's not everyone who realises this assertion
consciously. When I was younger,somewhat 12 years old, I was in domestic
accident that left my face with deep scar.

I hit into a window face first, I was numb and surprised at broken glasses at my
feet. I was not aware that I had succumbed a deep cut and I felt no pain at all.
Sooner had I hit the glass window at my Grandmas place than I heard my cousin
horrified screaming and crying. I was panicking, then I noticed blood flowing on my
face like paint and I suddenly joined the crying and screaming club. I was hurt and
there was no adult at home . Fast forward, I never went to the hospital a day and it
took about three years to heal. I'm a firm believer of Harry Crews who said "There
is something beautiful about all scars of whatever nature. A scar means the hurt is
over, the wound is closed and healed, done with.

Deep wounds leaves thicker scars that will probably never heal or completely get
rid off . But The deeper the scars the sweeter the healing process. I have learnt
with time , even the badges of wounds, fever and hurt go away,nothing is
permanent and absolute, it all depends on what you dim it to be and the meaning
you give it. During that time, i longed to go out without a badge , it was infinitive
place to have ever imagined. "Time does heal, it makes bearable." I'm not ashamed
of my scars, because when you see it , it tells you automatically the story of victory.
Some of us we have learn to live and accept the face of victory. Many of you , your
scars are invisible, you are hurt and bitter from the inside because of traumatic
childhood, left or death of a loved one,and you too need healing. Just like anything
that develops and grows, healing is a process. You can't achieve it or afford it
overnight, you have to go through the pain first, the hurt, the bleeding and swollen
muscles to ultimately achieve it.
You may think to yourself, that's an accident and there's nothing we do about it. Well, yes! But
I'm also talking about heart break, depression, divorce and deadly illness, how about that now?.
We can heal , we can overcome ,if we permit ourselves to.There's something about the human
spirit that, given a chance and glance of hope we can change the unchangeable.
If you think you are sick, you are definitely sick. If you think and affirm you are healing, healing
takes place. You instantly feel better and walk better.
True healing comes from within, it has a touch that can fix what science can't explain. My
desire is to understand it's complexity to the core.
How do you explain the reflex-actions? The body defending itself against the cruelty and harsh
environment.even when we are unconsciously aware, the mind and body is doing what it does
best, healing.

There is no place where you can explore to find complete healing, apart from the inside. I love
to say what Sadh guru says, inner engineering . Marcus Aurelius once said, " Choose not to be
harmed-and you wouldn't feel harmed. Don't feel harmed-and you haven't been ."
Your mind , body , emotions and energies are given to you. What you cannot do or heal is
nothing. It may take time, but we will eventually heal and make stronger.
If Medicine was meant for healing, we wouldn't be buying Because saving human life was
important than billion of bank notes,if medication was curable ,we wouldn't be having side
effects.
The best alternative for healing is the self. Watch yourself, every single thing makes
towards the healing process counts, it would be affirmation , meditation and herbs.
In the wise words of Dr Sebi,“A society that keeps cures a secret so they can
continue to sell medication for huge profits is not a real society but a huge mental
asylum.”
Early this year, my cousin was critically sick and was immediately admitted to the
hospital. She was fighting for her life in dire situations. She wouldn't eat from the
mouth, food was injected in tube through the nostrils. When I saw that my soul was
grieving and in complete havoc. I would feel my heart heat from my chest, it was like
I was running of of oxygen,it was hard and difficult. Staying there doing nothing but
watching and offering support made things ten times harder.

As I was trying to get out of hospital on that particular day, I suddenly collapsed and
almost fallen on the patient who was laying on the bed next to the day as you walk
out of the ward. I was picked from the ground and seated on black garden chair by
the doctors and I was consciously advised to relax because I was overwhelmed with
thoughts. I have never felt that way in my life ever before.
She wouldn't open her eyes, but consciously present as she would respond when
you called her Name.
During visiting years, I remember clearly talking to my aunt her mother about her
condition. She said, " She will be fine."
Within days of fighting and turmoil, she passed away, my inner being Trimble.

We prayed, we did everything we would do and I can vividly remember when she
asked me to specifically pray for her. I prayed that day like no-other, making the
entire ward a praying room as other patients joined.
Longed and prayed to see her back on her feet again, completely healed without no
avail and of course, we needed to heal ourselves afterwards. One way to the other,
we need healing from everything that crippled our abilities.
 ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

The writing of this book wouldn't have been made possible without the help of my
mentors , consistent support of family and friends and Authors and thinkers whose
works made it easier to write this book.Anything valuable in this book came from them
not me. There's no word in the English dictionary to express my gratitude and
appreciation to my grandmother, Winnie Ngwe,
my earthly hero,my strict and conservative mother,Stella Mkandawire, to my
cheerleaders,supporters and friends, John Banda , Emmanuel Ngwendwa ,freeman
Mayele and Mukelabai Mukelabai Jr your help and contribution towards this book is of
great help. Kennedy Chikaile , who greatly shaped my academic life . Cirus Mende and
Yotham Mwanza , who's teaching has helped me through the difficult times and
strengthened my spirituality .
Her exemplary leadership ,
Her Worship the Mayor of the great city of Lusaka,Chilando Chitangala. Honourable
member of parliament, Monty Chikuli, for always standing with the young people in our
community Kanyama .Sandra Njapao my Civic Teacher, who is also like a Mother to
me. I would further extend my sincerity appreciation to Nelson Longesha who
supported me throughout the this process of the book.
 COPY RIGHT

@copyright 2024-Aaron Mutama

First published in Zambia 2024

All right reserved .

Published in Zambia by
AC Publishing company,
Lusaka,Zambia.
 Congratulations !!!

You are more than ready to deal with turmoil with complete tranquility . You will
never be the same again. Let's go , and change the world
Look out for amazing books from Aaron Mutama.

If this book has challenged your life, I would love to hear it from you.
Get in touch with me on :
Contact: +260779971777
Whatapp:+260777594437
Email: aaronkmutam@gmail.com
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