A MIRROR DARKLY

AHMED YERIMA

1
AUTHOR’S NOTE

In my cold room in Gaborone, I wrote this play from the very depth of my soul and
in the textual style of an earlier play of mine, Haze, which emerged from the
frightful COVID experience of my race, I have chosen to set this play. During that
horrid period, I lost great friends and recently, as I stared at the picture of a once
very happy family now sitting on the grave of their dearest child, broken, shredded
and empty, I knew I had to do this. So, this time, I turn with profound sadness to
this play. As I interviewed near victims of suicide, and saw emptied bodies of
mangled souls willingly forced out of their once human shells, I was confronted
with a new wave of fear staring at me; my greater fear manifested as the young
living souls determined to follow their forerunners, when the need was more
compelling, voiced their anger at me… at us.

Who failed who, I kept asking? Who? Their profound anger fitting the contortion
of their angry faces, as if convincing themselves to take the plunge when the need
arises. Yet as their freshly painted coffins fit the newly dug crypts by the Church, I
could feel my questions unanswered. Now as I write, a silent cold wind blows, and
with eyes pelted with tears, from afar, yet so near, I cringe.

My profound thanks go to my Editors, Karen and Brigette. And most of all, Leke
Oluwalogbon and Mojisola Boroffice…my special advisers.

Ahmed Yerima

2
DRAMATIS PERSONAE

Gatekeeper

Boy

Mother

Father

Dude

Girl

Singers and Musicians

3
 A MIRROR DARKLY

DARKSTAGE WHEN PLAY BEGINS. A SPOTLIGHT ON THE

GATEKEEPER, DRESSED IN A LONG WHITE TUNIC. ANGRY, HE BELOWS
INTO THE DARK SPACE.

GATEKEEPER: I am the Gatekeeper. The angel of the Lord, whose eyes

are steadfast on the souls of the dead. The unwavering prosecutor. I am
the defender of the sacred covenant between life and death. I am he who
keeps his fixed gaze on the passage of heaven’s gate. Here, I separate the
chaff from the grains. I allow pure souls in after they have been gathered
by Datti, the chief soul gatherer. What a horrid world this is becoming.
Today, I sat in court bedeviled by young souls in a hurry to die. Gosh!
What is going on down there? There was a time when men and women
fasted and prayed…begged even for death to skip their names in these big
books. But no! Not anymore. These days, even the young ones desire
death. What have they seen? What do they know of life when they have
not even lived half? They are all so pitiful... even I, the Gatekeeper, am
confused. Alarmed by the spate of young souls taking the plunge
willingly, I summoned Mori, the great spirit of death to tell me why.
HE BELLOWS Most of these willing souls of death just want to die.
Why I ask again? Did the Holy father not say that we will see like a
mirror dimly…then face to face? Let another one dare. Let him come
close to me, and I will knock sense into that thick skull…still soft with…
goodness! I almost lost it. I forgot. I must remain composed at the gate of
Heaven. Hmm. I smell a spirit…a restless one. Step forward. Let me see
your face. Now! BOY UNSURE, STEPS FORWARD. A SPOTLIGHT
PICKS HIM TOO. Ha … you? Come, son. Who are you? I have just
finished with those marked out to die today. HE OPENS THE BIG BOOK
IN FRONT OF HIM. FLIPS THROUGH. I can’t find your name here. HE
CHECKS THE OTHER BOOKS. Or in any of the other books. You are
not listed to die today. LOOKS UP. GETTING ANGRY. Young man,
who are you and where do you intend to go?

BOY: Heaven.

4
GATEKEEPER: LETS OUT A BIG LAUGH. Heaven? I said I cannot find your
name in any of the Books. HE YELLS What are you doing here? It is not your
time yet. I say who are you? What is your name?

BOY: FRIGHTENED Boy.

GATEKEEPER: Yes. Go on. SPOTLIGHT ON BOY GROWS BRIGHTER. HIS

BLOODSTAINED WHITE CLOTH IS REVEALED. What is this? No one gave
you
the last respects? Not a wash? Not even a change of dress?

BOY: Respects? CHUCKLES. No.

GATEKEEPER: Why?

BOY: I took my life.

GATEKEEPER: Why?

BOY: It was too much and I couldn’t take it anymore. BEGINS TO CRY

GATEKEEPER: Calm down and talk to me. WATCHES HIM CRY FOR A
WHILE. It is alright.

BOY: It is not.

GATEKEEPER: Talk to me please. How did it get to this? Where did it all go
wrong? How? When?

BOY: At Twelve. That was when it all started, they began to mold me for this
dastardly act with their harsh words. They made me feel useless. Oh! how I wish I
could make you hear what my parents did to me.

LIGHTS DIM ON THE GATEKEEPER AND BOY. LIGHTS SLOWLY COMES

ON FATHER, WHO STANDS HOLDING A REPORT CARD, ANGRY. BOY
ENTERS AND STANDS BEFORE FATHER, STILL ANGRY.

FATHER: How old are you now, fool?

5
BOY: Twelve, sir.

FATHER: What did I ask you to become in life?

BOY: A Judge like Grandpa and Grandma. Or a successful Barrister like you and
Mum.

FATHER: But with this result, you would never become anything, because you are
a useless, good for nothing, aimless, unambitious fool. A big joke. That is what
you are. And that is all you will ever be. A disgrace to my highly esteemed family.

MOTHER: ENTER MOTHER. What is it again!?

FATHER: See what your son has brought home. Straight Fs. How on earth can he
ever become anything in life?

MOTHER: Ehen! I have always said it, the witches and wizards in your family will
not leave my son alone. May God send a thousand curses to all the demons in your
family who are after the destruction of my son. As far as I am concerned, he is
cursed. He is a child of shame. A useless buffoon.

BOY: Mother. MOVES CLOSER TO HER.

MOTHER: Don’t you dare touch me. I regret the day I gave birth to you. You will
never amount to anything good in your life. I cannot even raise my head up
amongst my friends at the Club. You are a big curse of the fifth generation from
your father’s family. Useless. Baseless and Empty!

FATHER: I agree totally.

THEY FREEZE AS LIGHTS SLOWLY FADE.

WHEN LIGHTS RETURN:

BOY: Those were the harsh words that nurtured me from home. Coupled with
pressure I was receiving in school.

GATEKEEPER: Which other pressures?

6
BOY: Some of the teachers never saw anything good in me. And they never
hesitated in calling me names. Some cursed me. They said I will never amount to
anything good. They said I was a disgrace to the Institution and they made
demands and vowed I will never graduate if I don’t meet their demands. Always
they poured out their frustration on me and others.

GATEKEEPER: How?

BOY: They envied me for what they thought I was. Son of a rich man, a brat. They
cursed me every day. I heard and absorbed their taunts and abuses every day in
different variations! Both my teachers and parents broke me. I had indeed, lost
everything. There was no need to live any further.

GATEKEEPER: No. Don’t say such awful things. You were wonderfully and
fearfully made by God.

BOY: CHUCKLES. Me?

GATEKEEPER: Yes, you! You are made in God’s image. Let me see. FLIPS
THROUGH THE BIG BOOK. Come closer. Face this book. Ha, there you are.
You were supposed to live until you were eighty-five years old. You see what I
mean?

BOY: Me? Eighty-five years old? Why? Who was so generous with time that he
gave me so much?
GATEKEEPER: God gave you those years to live by his grace. You were to
become a very famous and rich man.

BOY: CHUCKLES. Well, it’s too late.

GATEKEEPER: STILL RUNNING HIS HAND ON THE PAGE OF THE BOOK.

Ha…you were to marry a most beautiful woman, and live a very affluent life.
Touching the world with your kindness.

BOY: BREAKS INTO A BIG LAUGH. Then why did God not tell me all these?
Not even a glimpse…or a flash. Even in a dream. The very life he gave me…
haunted me.

7
GATEKEEPER: A powerful man in government. A mover and shaker in life. Very
successful. Here a picture, here with your parents. They exude joy and pride over
their son.

BOY: Rubbish. How was I to achieve that? The world I found myself in, made me
feel inferior. I cried more tears than I drank water. God’s time took too long. So, I
cut mine short, based on what I had and what I felt.

GATEKEEPER: You could have been a bit more patient. Patience is the key.

BOY: CHUCKLES Patience was dead in me. I had to take hold of my life. And I
have done with it what I pleased. I have cut my cord from that horrid forsaken
world.

GATEKEEPER: Pity.

BOY: Pity? Why? This is why I stepped out of turn and I cut the cord.

GATEKEEPER: Again, you say it. Cut the cord. Which cord?

BOY: The one that ties one to life. The one that tied me to that wicked woman.
Sometimes, I wish I were not born. It would have been better for all parties
concerned.

GATEKEEPER: Parties?

BOY: Sorry, my parents. They were not even there to see me buried. They came
up with one cock and bull story about tradition not allowing them to see the corpse
or the graveside of their dead child. But I know the truth. They do not care. They
have never cared and now that I am no longer alive to remind them of my pathetic
existence, they will never have to pretend to care again. You needed to have seen
how those strangers forced me into that tight box. Not a drop of tears. Not a touch
of love. Not even a scratch. Nothing. They were so eager to bury me among
strangers I never knew. They were too eager to fill the crypt with warm graveled
darkness. That day, in the heat of the night a heart heavy with guilt, they pretended
to cry.

GATEKEEPER: They? Who are they?

8
BOY: My parents. I went to their rooms. Those who gave me life, could not even
pray for me. Instead, each was enveloped with anger on my type of death…which
they considered brought shame to them. CHUCKLES. I had come to console
them…but I found out that I was also almost better than them. At least I was free.

GATEKEEPER: Did you honour them as God commanded?

BOY: Who? Honour who Sir?

GATEKEEPER: Your parents. Honour your parents. Remember the

commandment to honour your father and mother so that your days on earth will be
long. Did you?

BOY: Did they honour me? In our world respect begets respect. They hated me. I
was a nuisance. You heard them, did you not? Each wanted to live. And apart from
birthday pictures, I did not fit into their respective dreams. CHUCKLES.

GATEKEEPER: What now?

BOY: Truth is they did not even fit into each other’s picture! How did I ever
expect to fit into theirs? They swore before God to love and serve each other and
they couldn’t even keep that promise? How could I expect to be anything other
than a screw in their gears?

GATEKEEPER: Did you honour your parents?

BOY: SERIOUS. HE STARES AT HIM FOR A WHILE. COLDLY HE UTTERS

IN A MUFFLED VOICE. I did. But why did God give man and woman so much
power? They enjoy themselves, intimately. We get invited at the whims of their
moments of creative pleasure. And when we arrive, the blissful moment is gone…
the troubles of the chores of life…existence reigns and gradually, they abandon us.
Why?

GATEKEEPER: Abandon us?

BOY: Yes.

GATEKEEPER: Abandon you? Hm…these are heavy words.

9
BOY: Heavy words indeed. And who suffered from the effects of such heavy
words? Me. We. Who endures such bitter consequences? We. I. Those like who,
like me, stand before you Sir. And we are many. How can you help us?

GATEKEER: So, there are more like you?

BOY: Yes. Many angry, uncared for and unloved ones like me. BEGINS TO CRY.
Did I do anything wrong? Did I anger God by taking the action I did? I was
choking in his world, I died many times and this seemed the only way out of there,
to get out of that hell…that place. My parents did not care and God had forsaken
me. Too many wicked people are out there. Am I in the wrong for what I did? Am
I wrong? Sir? BEGINS TO CRY AND SUDDENLY, HE DROPS TO THE
FLOOR AND BEGINS TO WRITHE IN PAIN.

GATEKEEPER: Goodness! What is the problem? WATCHES HIM FOR A

WHILE.

BOY: Ah! The pain. Everything looks so fuzzy and hazy now. My anger melts…I
exhale. I feel all burnt up. BEGINS TO COUGH HELPLESSLY.

GATEKEEPER: Do you want a drink?

BOY: A drink? Yes. Do you have Codeine or Tramadol?

GATEKEEPER: Codeine? Trama what? Heavens! No! I don’t have such drinks.

BOY: Whiskey or Gin then? Weed?

GATEKEEPER: No! Not here! It is a sin to even think of such damned things.

BOY: Then…give me what you have. The ones I took before I jumped, are
beginning to wear out. I need something to lift my spirits up. HE CONTINUES TO
COUGH VIOLENTLY AS IF IN A SPASM.

GATEKEEPER: GETS UP GOES TO THE SMALL TABLE AND POURS

WATER INTO A GLASS. AND HELPS BOY TO DRINK IT. Slowly. This will
calm you down. SLOWLY BOY’S COUGH SUBSIDES. HE GOES TO THE
TABLE CARRIES ANOTHER BIG BOOK, AND BEGINS TO WRITE. Boy is
disturbed. Very disturbed. It is a case of self- inflicted harm. He could have been a
better person. But it is a huge sin…unforgivable. He took a life.

10
BOY: Hm? A life? Whose life?

GATEKEEPER: Hm?

BOY: Whose life was it anyway? God gave it to me freely. It was mine to take or
give. Was it not? But nobody made me see a reason to live it out. It was
unbearable, so I took it. Simple. GRADUALLY BOY BEGINS TO PULL
HIMSELF TOGETHER. What did you give me to drink? Tasteless but calming. I
like it. What was it Sir?

GATEKEEPER: Water.

BOY: Water? No! CHUCKLES. Heaven is good. Your water though ordinary like
ours is more soothing to the troubled nerves. Please Sir, I will take some of yours
back when I am returning home.

GATEKEEPER: You already have it there. Only wanted something stronger. Now
see all the problems it has caused mankind.

BOY: I like you Sir. But I can’t stay. Apart from your backward ideas about
family…and love, your medicines are good and quick. I am sorry, I flipped…I
heard the awful voices again…saying jump, drink this, do that, take more, try this
and that…and the pains in my soul increased, and my will once again gave way. I
am sorry. What was I saying?

GATEKEEPER: The stifling world.

BOY: What about it?

GATEKEEPER: What role did the other people play?

BOY: Most of them were the catalysts. They injected the poison of hatred in me.
They were killers of God’s light in me. CHUCKLES, but what did you expect,
they, themselves grew up in turbulence.

GATEKEEPER: Do your people ever accept Jesus as their personal Lord and
savior?

11
BOY: CHUCKLES. They do. But does God accept us as His children? Does Jesus
love us? Does he love me?

GATEKEEPER: Oh yes. Do you remember this Sunday School song which you
used to love? PAUSE AND SPEAKS THE LINE OF THE SONG WHILE
SINGING.

Jesus Loves me

Jesus loves me, this I know

For the Bible tells me so.
Little ones to him belong
They are weak, but he is strong.
(THEY BOTH SING) Yes, Jesus loves me
Yes, Jesus loves me.
Yes, Jesus loves me.
Yes, Jesus loves me.
The Bible tells me so.
(THEY COME CLOSER AS IF TO HUG. BUT THE GATEKEEPER AVOIDS
BOY, IS CONFUSED)
Does he love, son?

BOY: Yes. But…I never heard it this way.

GATEKEEPER: You heard what you wanted to hear. And did what you wanted to
do. Now it’s all gone so bad.

BOY: Yes. Do you think my parents will miss me?

GATEKEEPER: Always…with you here, there is a missing void that will never be
fixed. I know your mother well. Since your passing on, she has been shattered.

BOY: Mother shattered? Never! CHUCKLES. You must be referring to someone

else. Not that Iron Lady. My mother’s heart is made of steel.

GATEKEEPER: You think so? Did she not carry you for nine months? Did your
father and mother not find a blissful joy with your presence, and in your presence?

BOY: In me then, they were to find joy. I was entitled to their pampering. It was
my God given right, wasn’t it? And they denied me of that right. So, I took their

12
right over me too. Those two can never be broken. They are too busy and
successful to bother about my memory.

GATEKEEPER: Then who are these? See. THE LIGHTS DIM. A SPOTLIGHT
COMES ON. A PART OF THE STAGE LIGHTS UP. AND IT REVEALS
MOTHER, BROKEN, THE PICTURE OF HER SON ON HER LAPS. AS THE
SONG, “MISSING YOU”. PLAYS. SHE SINGS WITH PROFOUND SADNESS.
FATHER ENTERS. HE TRIES TO COMFORT HER AS THE SONG
CONTINUES. THE SONG ENDS WITH THEM HUGGING AND SLOW
LIGHTS ENDS.

Missing You

I'm full with tears

It's a deep pain that I'm going through
Going through going through

It’s a destruction of my soul

There was a lot going between mother and son

I dream about you every night my baby

Wanting you here with me
To hold me, hug me and call me mother

I'm missing you like crazy

My heart and soul is aching
Missing you son

I'm missing you

Missing you
Missing you
I'm missing you
I'm missing you

(FATHER ENTERS)

13
We are in love with you our son
And that's what we just keep telling ourselves
Over and over again
We’re not in the least bit amused by your loss
That’s why we are broken, we’re chattered and we miss you
We dream about you all the time
Wanting you here with us
To hold us, hug us and call us parents

We’re missing you like crazy

Our hearts and souls are aching
Missing you son
We’re missing you son

God knows we’re trying to survive without you

We can’t love another person as we love you
We’re hurt by your absence, yes
The hurts get under our skin
All we know is we can't let you go
And that's the way it is

We’re missing you like crazy

Our hearts and souls are aching
Missing you son

Missing you son

Trying to go somewhere
Missing you
Missing you
We’re Missing you
Missing you
We’re Missing you

BOY: IN TEARS. Did they really do that for me? Are they genuinely hurt? Please
forgive me. But did I have to die to see this? Maybe I was in a hurry.

GATEKEEPER: Your generation is always in a hurry. You all are trapped within
the focus of the screens. Screens that make you feel you are in charge of the world,
when you are only a mere dot. CHUCKLES. What are those new titles you give
yourselves again, Millennials, GenY, Gen Z and Gen Alpha? All new titles which

14
have become names for those trapped in the jaws of the enemy. PICKS HIS
PHONE FROM THE TABLE. This is the weapon. The one that heightens your
sense of urgency…your new power, that makes you feel you can rule the world.
What did you do with it?

BOY: I sent my last messages to those I loved.

GATEKEEPER: Did anyone reply you?

BOY: No. I guess it was too late. Even my friend Dude, never did. He must have
slept while I contemplated the jump.

GATEKEEPER: How could he? Who waits for another to take his life? Was he
born rich?

BOY: No. He was just like me.

GATEKEEPER: Was he problem free?

BOY: No. No. He had a double portion of them. But he always had a cheerful
attitude. I even bought him food. Sometimes, we just share a can of Sardines and
bread, and fool ourselves that it was a plate of smoky chicken stew on a bed of
white rice and Dodo. CHUCKLES. PAUSE. He came from a broken home you
know? His parents were separated when he was five, From there he was passed on
from one grand mother to the other. Then came the turn of uncles and Aunties.
That was when the degradation started. He was beaten too much, he still bears the
scars to this day. PAUSE. And yet, he learnt to accept life as it is. CHUCKLES. A
bite at a time, he called it. It will be better someday, he often said. Never a dull
moment with him. He took what life threw at him always with a smile. Wait he had
a song he taught me. Nights when I was feeling low, he would bring out his guitar
and we will both sing to it.

LONE LIGHT LIGHTS UP DUDE AS HE SINGS BYRON THOMAS’ HOLD

ON CHANGE IS COMING. BOY JOINS HIM. GATEKEEPER IS EXCITED
AND CLAPS AS SONG ENDS.

Hold on Change is Coming

Hmm
All right, ooh yeah

15
Well, oh, yeah
Yeah, here we go y'all
Singing a little message out to those of you feel like they're struggling
Hmm, yeah, it's a simple song
Yeah, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
Hmm, oh yeah

Yesterday, a man stepped to me, said

How can you smile when your world is crumbling down?
I said, it's my secret
When I want to cry, I take a look around
And I see that I'm getting by

And I hold on (hold on)

Change is coming (change is coming)
Hold on (hold on)
Don't you worry (don't you worry about a thing)
Hold on (hold on)
You can make it (you can make it)
Hold on (hold on)
Everything (everything will be all right)

Some people like to worry

Some people like to hide
Some people like to run away from the pain inside
Now, that's your business, uh
Do whatever you want to do
But if it don't work out, here's what you ought to do

Now, just hold on (hold on)

Change is coming (change is coming)
Hold on (hold on)
Don't you worry (don't you worry about a thing)
Hold on (hold on)
You can make it (you can make it)
Now hold on (hold on)
Everything (everything will be all right) is gonna be alright

When the troubles of life

Weigh you down

16
Just lift your head up (yeah, yeah)
When the love you seek
Is hard to find
Don't give up, just be strong
Keep the faith

And hold on (hold on)

Change is coming (change is coming)
Hold on (hold on)
Everything (don't you worry about a thing) is gonna be alright
(Hold on)
See, you can make it (you can make it)
Hold on (hold on)
Everything, everything, everything (everything will be all right) is gonna be alright

Here's a little simple song, y'all

When the troubles seem like they just won't go away
Friends let you're down, things getting bounced around
Here's a little lullaby we like to sing
And it goes a little like this
Come on, listen

La, la (la, la)

La, la (la, la)
La, la (la, la)
La, la (la, la)

Come on, y'all

La, la (la, la)
La, la (la, la)
La, la (la, la)
La, la (la, la)

Now hold on (hold on)

Your change is coming (change is coming)
Hold on (hold on)
Don't you worry (don't you worry about a thing) no, no, no, no
Hold on (hold on)
Here is change, you can make it (you can make it)

17
Hold on (hold on)
Everything (everything will be all right) everything is gonna be alright

Change is coming
Change is coming (hold on)
Hold on (hold on, don't worry about a thing)
Hold on (hold on, you can make it)
Hold on (hold on)
Everything (everything will be all right) everything is gonna be alright

La, la (la, la)

La, la (la, la)
La, la (la, la)
When you feel down (la, la)
But no one's around (la, la)
Just singing my song (la, la)

BOY: EXCITED. His song meant so little to me then. But now it makes a lot of
sense. SMILES BROADLY. I am so happy.

GATEKEEPER: I can see. But why did you not do that all the time?

BOY: Do what?

GATEKEEPER: Listen to your Guardian Angel?

BOY: CHUCKLES AGAIN. I am sorry Sir, you make me laugh. Guardian Angel?
Dude? What did you say Sir? We are talking about Dude. He was the poorest
Mouse in school.

GATEKEEPER: Yes. But he did not take his own life? He sang songs to
encourage you. He was a friend. A companion. Your Peter, the rock. And when it
was time, you stepped on him and walked away. Selfish!

BOY: No. He was my best friend.

GATEKEEPER: And yet, you did not remember him in your haze of despair. Like
you did your parents, like you did your life. You only thought of how you were
feeling. What is that word you like so much? Entitlement. Selfish!

18
BOY: No!

GATEKEEPER: Did you listen to anyone then? Selfish! It was so Selfish of you!

BOY: Me?

GATEKEEPER: Yes. You wasted God’s precious gift.

BOY: LOOKS UP. Father, I am sorry.

GATEKEEPER: CHUCKLES. Too late son! The Gourd is cracked and there is
slit. See how the fresh milk of life flows out. Wasting. Gradually, it gets sucked up
by the gaping holes of the earth. BOY BEGINS TO CRY. What is this for? I
thought you told me that you were a big boy? What happened to your once proud
broad shoulders? Why waste these precious tears. You need for the remaining of
your afterlife time. A drop a day. For eternity.

BOY: I am afraid.

GATEKEEPER: Of what? Of whom? Of where?

BOY: I feel empty all of a sudden. Sad.

GATEKEEPER: Were you never in love? I mean, did you never like a girl. That is
the relationship accepted by God. Did you ever love a girl in school? BOY IS
QUIET. HE JUST STARES. I am talking to you Boy. Was there ever a girl in your
life?

BOY: NODS. AND BEGINS TO CRY AGAIN. I had one.

GATEKEEPER: What was her name?

BOY: Girl.

GATEKEEPER: Okay. Girl. Did you love her?

BOY: Yes. BEGINS TO CRY AGAIN.

GATEKEEPER: What now? Please give me a simple answer.

19
BOY: If I tell you, will I be able to see God?

GATEKEEPER: Yes. You will continue to see him and hear the Father as long as
you are with me. Speak.

BOY: Girl was beautiful. She was the kindest friend I ever had. She showed a love
my parents never did. I could talk to her. Each time we met, she paid. But she
would give me the money to pay. I felt really born again. She gave me my self-
respect. My heart opened up to her.

GATEKEEPER: Because of the gifts?

BOY: No. I was somebody to her. She gave me my dues. We even started talking
about a grand wedding after graduation. Her parents spoiled her with gifts, and she
made sure I always got my share of them. She used to sing a song to Jesus. It also
makes sense now. She believed so much in his healing powers, I got jealous.

GIRL: SINGS CHANGE IN YOUR NAME

Change in your Name

You give me purpose

You make it all worth it
When I give up
You lift me up
It's always enough

You are the reason

That I'm still breathing
No matter the season
Burnt or I'm bleeding
I'm always enough

So I wanna change
Change in Your name
Oh, I wanna change

20
Through all my mistakes
You love me the same way
No, I don't deserve You
I'll never desert You
You are the one

To You, I surrender
I'll be Your defender
'Cause You gave me life
So I give You mine
It's Yours to define

So I wanna change
Change in Your name

(I wanna change)
Fill me up with Your fire
Take me higher and higher
Anything You require

(I wanna change)
Give me all of Your glory
I am here at Your mercy
I will never be worthy

(I wanna change)
Fill me up with Your fire (I wanna change)
Take me higher and higher (I wanna change)
Anything You require (change in Your name)

(I wanna change)
Give me all of Your glory (I wanna change)
I am here at Your mercy (I wanna change)
I will never be worthy (change in Your name)

So I wanna change
Change in Your name
I wanna change
Change in Your name

21
CLOSE TO TEARS, HE BEGINS TO CRY.

GATEKEEPER: What now?

BOY: But one day. STOPS AND STARES INTO SPACE.

GATEKEEPER: WATCHES HIM FOR A WHILE. Yes, what happened to her?

Why did you love someone so much and you did this to yourself? BOY DOES
NOT ANSWER. HE JUST CONTINUES TO CRY. I say what happened?

BOY: We had finished watching a Volley ball game at the Sports Center. On our
back, she started to cough. And before we got to the Health Center, she could no
longer walk. So, my friends and I carried her. We called for the school Ambulance.
By the time we got there she called my name three times and before I could
answer, she was gone.

GATEKEEPER: To where?

BOY: Here. She was stone cold…dead. BREAKS INTO TEARS. Life really has
no meaning. The only one who genuinely loved me! she was gone! just like that!
Life is wicked. God is ….

GATEKEEPER: Shut your rotten mouth fool. Each man his own path. Not a stupid
word from you.

BOY: Why did he let our paths cross? Why does God not love me? He stripped me
of everything. Love, understanding, growth, not a strand of happiness. My self-
confidence was totally gone. I became an empty shell of nothingness. So, I decided
to break it down. I say whose life is it anyway? Mine. Since God has shattered my
life, I decided to finish it for him. Shatter my existence. And this evening at the
scene of my accident and as they scrapped what was left from my body, I could
feel a sense of release. My spirit rose, until it totally lifted from my body. For one
false moment, I thought I found happiness, but what I was really feeling was a cold
numbness. Lifeless and cold. Slowly, I wept, these were my last moments as a
living being. Then I began to sob. I just wept as I watched them dote over my
shattered shell. Then I began to float. First, to the eating center by Double Four
where the banter of buying and selling continued, then, my room where I saw
Dude sleeping, then the Dinning Hall, where some watched a football match and I
watched as their voices began to sound faint, as they ordered for what they wanted

22
to eat. The pain was such that not one single soul mentioned my name or what I
had done. And if they did, I was now only a whisper. That was when I started to
wonder if I had done the right thing. Did I?

GATEKEEPER: SHAKES HIS HEAD SADLY. No. But did you miss anything?

BOY: NOT LISTENING. IN A MONOTONE HE CONTINUES. By the

Auditorium I heard the Choir practicing my song. I loved that song. They were
singing my favorite song. I tried to join, but no one heard or saw me. Not even the
Chaplain.

GATEKEEPER: Which song was that?

BOY: BOY WATCHES THE DARK SPACE AS THE LONE LIGHT COMES
ON. THE CHOIR BEGINS TO SING. BOY STEPS INTO THE LIGHT AND
BEGINS TO SING WITH THEM.

In Christ Alone

In Christ alone, my hope is found

He is my light, my strength, my song
This cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My comforter, my all in all
Here in the love of Christ I stand

In Christ alone, who took on flesh

Fullness of God in helpless babe
This gift of love and righteousness
Scorned by the ones He came to save
'Til on that cross as Jesus died
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live

There in the ground, His body lay

Light of the world, by darkness slain

23
Then bursting forth in glorious day
Up from the grave, He rose again
And as He stands in victory
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ

No guilt in life, no fear in death

This is the power of Christ in me
From life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No pow'r of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
'Til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
'Til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand

AT THE END OF THE SONG. HE BREAKS DOWN CRYING.

BOY: Will God forgive me now? Can I return Sir? Can I pick up from where I had
stopped?

GATEKEEPER: No son. Have you forgotten that it is appointed unto men to die
once and after that is judgment? That was why Christ was offered to bear the sins
of many. It is too late son.

BOY: So, what is going to happen to me now? I have learnt my lesson. I will be
more understanding of the meaning of life now. No demands, no sense of
entitlement, I swear.

GATEKEEPER: Swear? To whom? By whom? For what?

Remember, the Bible says, we shall see through a mirror darkly, but then face to
face with the Creator. And only through Him, shall we find salvation. You lost it
son.

24
BOY: And now?

GATEKEEPER: You wait.

BOY: Wait? I say I am ready to return, pick up from where I stopped. Plead with
my parents for forgiveness. Love my friends better. Wait for the prophecies of your
big books. I am ready to start again. THE GATEKEEPER BEGINS TO PACK
HIS STUFF. Where are you going Sir? I still want to see God. I still have some
questions unanswered. I am ready to prosper and not to perish. He promised me
hope and that the plans he has for me are plans of good to give me a future, did he
not? He said he would heal everything that is broken. He would heal my wounds. I
am here, let him heal me now and give me another chance. I beg you Sir.

GATEKEEPER: Too late son.

BOY: But Sir, even if you will not grant me a passage back to the world of the
living, can you send an Angel from here to go and warn my brothers and sisters. Or
others who like me are contemplating to take their own lives?

GATEKEEPER: No. They have their Clergy men, Chaplains and other anointed
men of God around them. Let them listen to them.

BOY: CHUKLES. Clergymen? Chaplains, anointed men of God? Where? They

are too busy chasing after other things. They have no time for saving our souls
anymore. The good ones are few.

GATEKEEPER: The good ones? They are supposed to be all men of God. Unless
they are not mine. Those ones shall be damned. Darkness cannot live within God’s
light. Even the darkened ones will perish too. You too failed.

BOY: That is why I say that if an Angel from here should go to them, they will
listen. I plead with you Sir, there are many now, contemplating this damned action.
Please, don’t let them come this same way.

GATEKEEPER: If they did not listen to my anointed men of God, I tell you they
will not be convinced even if I send a band of Angels from here. Goodnight son.
See you on judgement day. SLOWLY SONG BEGINS AS LIGHTS CONTINUE
TO DIM SLOWLY.

25
GATEKEEPER LEAVES THE STAGE. BOY IS LEFT ALONE SOBBING,
UNDER A SPOTLIGHT AS THE SONG SLOWLY ENDS, LIGHTS FADE.

MAN, OF GOD COMES ON STAGE; BRIEF COUNSELLING IS GIVEN AND

AN ALTAR CALL IS MADE, AFTER WHICH THERE IS WORSHIP AND …

THE END.

26