I applied to this college I had my eyes on and I got into it without much trouble

and then soon I started the process of shifting here. It happen so quickly and with
no trouble. I was all alone in this damn place. I knew no one here and so I'm here
all alone by myself. Although I shifted here very efficiently, it took me months to
get adjusted to this new place. I had a hard time adjusting to this new place as
many of the differences. Although Assam is a neighbouring state but the culture and
tradition is very different. Assam is like the mini mainland India as many of the
people here are of the mainland, unlike Arunachal. In Arunachal, there are people
from mainland India but it is very less as compared to Assam. Assam welcomes all
the people from mainland India and anyone can buy land and house and settle down in
Assam but in Arunachal only the natives are allowed to posses the rights of land in
the state and outsiders are not allowed to buy lands and settle down. Arunachal and
Nagaland are only the state where outsiders can't posses the rights of land and
requires pass to enter into the state. So that is why it was big of a shock for me,
seeing so many unfamiliar faces. I've seen mainland people before but less in
numbers as compared to Assam. It was very hard for me to find someone who looks
just like me, I mean the tribals.

I started to go to college and it was hard for me to adjust to this college. I was
all alone and knew no one here and had a hard time making friends. There were
people who were from my state but they were from different department. I'm an
introvert so it's very hard for me to communicate. And that is why I've quite few
friends and to be honest they're very close to me. They were the first to take the
initiatives to communicate and that's how we became friends. If they hadn't take
the initiatives we wouldn't be friends and I would be probably alone. And yeah
they're actually my childhood friends and I wanted to change for the better. I
wanted to change my personality and improve my communication level and if I stayed
with my friends i wouldn't be able to do so and be stuck in my comfort zone
forever. But even after I transferred here, I wasn't even able to make any new
friends and wasn't even able to communicate to new people. One can't change in a
single day and since I'm an INTP, this is a very challenging. Only 4% of people
around the world has this MBTI. It is the rarest personality type in the world.
INTP are very introverted and that is why I'm unsuccessful to do so. So here I'm
lonely. I'm regretting my decision. Why is it so hard to make new friends and talk
to new people. I only have my childhood friends whom I talk on call after my
classes and share my experiences and loneliness and they always nag me about it and
expresses their unhappiness that I've shifted to a different state as they were all
studying in Arunachal and I'm here in Assam. Although it's not that far but they
are unhappy about it. I haven't even informed them that I'll be going to different
state for my studies as I knew if I did then they'll probably wouldn't allow me so
and would forced me to take admission in Arunachal.

Julie : HEY! how are the boys there? are they handsome?
One of my friends asked me as we are in video chat.

" There are! but quite few"

I replied honestly.

Julie : If you have gone to our college, you would be falling every minutes as you
pass by. there are so many handsome and cute boys here and everyone looks like
they're from Korea. You should have come to our college.

Sharon: yeah! we would've had so much fun and you know what, remember the guy with
the spectacles in our high school is also at our college.

Julie : You mean that chasmish, our crush?

Sharon : Yeah and is in my department. Oh gosh! I guess we are made for each other
and God himself is trying to get us closer. I think we're meant to be. Don't you
think?

" Yeah! I guess someone is going to get a boyfriend soon"

I replied my friend, teasing her. We always tease each other like this. Me and
Julie haven't gotten into any relationship before but Sharon has been into several
relationship before. She was the prettiest among our friend group. Julie is pretty
as well but always avoid talking to guys as she wanted to focus on her studies
although she always joke about men but she didn't mean it and doesn't wanna date
now. She's ambitious and hardworking person and a straight forward person. Although
she is an introvert, she is very different from me. She is confident, smart and
also a great leader. She was one of the school Captain. I was also the part of the
school union. I was the literary captain and she was the vise-G.S. She has always
inspired me and make me want to become one like her. To be honest she is my first
love. I admired her a lot. I have learned a lot from her and there is more to learn
from her. I don't know since when i started to have feelings for her. I've never
confessed my feelings to her as i know she's straight and doesn't feel the same way
as i felt for her. I know this is wrong and this is also one of the reason why i
came here in a different state to get over her. If i stayed with her and study
together i won't be able to get over her.

Julie: Hey Yani! what are you thinking? Sharon is asking when is your fresher
meets? Are you even there?

It seems like i was lost in my thought, thinking about my old past and didn't paid
attention to my friends' words.

TING!

I got a message!

" Hey! I'll talk to you guys later. I got some errands to do"

I lied to them and cut the call without letting them utter a word a and opened the
message box which reads -

"Are you free?"

I smiled after reading the message. I've been texting to this girl for a couple of
weeks now, and she has become my comfort zone. We met in a dating app. She's so
beautiful, cute and attractive and even the way she talks is so cute. She's the
type of girl i want in my life and to be honest, talking to this girl always makes
my day and it helped me to get over Julie. Although I'm not over her but i believe
that she'll be the one to get me over her and it's happening.

" Nah! I'm expensive!"

I replied. Although I'm very introverted and shy person but in online i don't feel
shy.

"So how much worth are you?" she replied

"I'm expensive but for you I'm always free"

I flirted with her. I always flirt with her hoping she'd be impressed and fall for
me. I really want her in my life. And to be honest, I'm really lucky that i got
match up with her and she liked me back, actually not, she was the first to like my
profile and when i first show her profile and swiped right, boom! it was a match
(i was using the free version of that app XD). She's way out of my league. She's so
beautiful and I am pretty average actually below average >_< that's why i don't
wanna let her go.
"Oh really? i was thinking of buying you. I guess I don't have to use my money on
you then" she replied back

"Don't worry, I wouldn't let you use your money, Mommy gonna buy you everything"

"Are you rich? Mommy?" she replied again

"I'm not but I'll be rich for you so that you could buy anything you want baby <3"

"Okay then Mommy! XD Btw it's been weeks now. When do you wanna meet? I wanna see
you so badly" she said

"We've seen each other several times via video chats. So why do you wanna meet me?"

"Seeing each other in video calls and meeting each other in person is a different
thing. I want us to be more than friends. I wanna feel you, hold your hands and go
on long walks like other couples. You know what i mean right? I like you and wanna
be your girlfriend. I know it hasn't been that long since we started talking but i
feel like you're the one for me. Don't you feel the same way as me?" she texted.
She has always been the one to openly accept the fact that she likes me.

"I like you as well but I'm afraid that you won't like me as I'm online. I'm
completely a different person not like how you expect me to be. I might let you
down" i replied honestly.

"I like you and I know from the way you talk to me that you're a nice person and
you liked me as well but if we communicate through online only, i feel like we will
eventually fall apart someday and I don't want it to happen. I know you're not
ready to meet me but I'll wait for you" she texted again

"Okay, let's meet but I'll decide the place and time"
I replied her after giving much thought. It's a tough decision for me but i really
want her in my life and as she said if we stayed this way she might be taken away
from me so I'll try my best to not to let her go.

"Really? Yay! I love you" she replied cheerfully.

I could imagine her face smiling happily

"Okay! then I'll text you later then. I got to go to buy myself lunch as i haven't
eaten yet and I don't wanna cook right now. I'll text you later"

"Okay then take care! I'll miss you. Love ya <3" she texted me back

"Love you too! Bye"

I sent the message and lock my phone and got out of bed to go buy myself lunch. I
was just going to the nearby shop so I didn't feel the need to change my clothes so
I didn't change my clothes and went out as I was. I wore a casual grey trouser with
a loose white t-shirt with my hair tied up with no makeup, with completely nothing
to enhance my looks. I didn't give much attention to my appearance so it doesn't
matter. I was the type of person who rarely goes out and give very less thought to
my appearance and rarely dress up.

As i ordered my food and as I waited for my food I scrolled through my phone to

pass the time. As I was sitting and waiting for my food to arrive a girl just walk
past me out of the door. At first i didn't gave much thought to it but a little
while later i felt like i know this person so I look at the direction she went but
it was too late as she was nowhere to be seen.

"Ma'am! Here's your order" the waiter brought my food.

"Oh okay! Thank you"

I paid the bill and took my order and headed to my rented apartment. I don't like
eating in crowded place and always prefer a quite, peaceful place. As i was walking
through the alley which led to my rented apartment while looking at my phone, I
bumped into someone. Shitttttttttt!!!! i messed up! I bumped into a girl and drop
her belongings. Her belongings were everywhere now because of me.

" I'm so sorry! I wasn't paying attention to the road. I'm so sorry it was my
fault"

I apologized to her while picking up her belongings.

" It's okay! Just focus on road from next time" the girl said

" I will surely....

As I was saying this I pass her, her phone and WTF she was none other Lucy. The
girl I've been talking for the past few weeks, the girl that i like is next to me.
And to be honest she is 10000x more prettier in real life. What in the world is she
here. I knew she lives in this same city but who would've thought she live that
close to me and out of any day, it has to be today when i look like a homeless
girl. I should have styled a lit bit. Why oh why? Out of so many people she had to
bumped into me? She is definitely disappointed with me.

"Yana" she called out my name

But before she could say any further, I run as fast as I could. I heard her calling
my name but I just ignored her. I thought I'll present my best when i meet her why
the f**ck it has to be today when I'm looking my worst. Oh God please tell me this
is a dream and someone PLEASE wake me up from this fking nightmare.
UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!