Module-3

Harmony in the Family and Society

Dr. Raja Yateesh Yadav

Associate Professor & Head
Department of Mechanical Engineering
SMVITM Bantakal
 Family as a basic unit of human interaction
• The family is the basic unit or building block of
human organization.
• Every human being is born in a family and is
part of a family, in which there are parents,
grandparents, children, youth, uncles and
aunts, cousins, so many relatives and friends.
• It is the family where we are nurtured and
developed from childhood, cared for in
sicknes and in old age.
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 Family as a basic unit of human interaction
• Family is the place where we start learning to
interact with other human beings, to share
and to care.
• It is the place where we start becoming aware
of relationship.
• Our basic grooming for living in relationship
starts in the family.
• The first few years, what we call the formative
years, are spent in the family.
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 Family as a basic unit of human interaction
• Family is the place where we pick up a very
significant part of our sanskar in living with
our family elders and siblings, neighbours
and friends.

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 Understanding Relationship
• Feeling of Relationship is the Basis
for Harmony in the Family.
• The harmony in the family has primarily to do
with the fulfilment of relationship between
one human being and the other human being.
• In order to fulfil relationship, it is necessary to
understand relationship.

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 Understanding Relationship
• Four important aspects of relationship are:
1. Relationship is - between one Self and
another Self
2. There are feelings in relationship-in one Self
for the other self
3. These feelings can be recognized - they are
definite
4. The fulfilment of these feelings and their right
evaluation lead to mutual happiness
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 Relationship is - between
one Self (I1) and another Self (I2)
• The relationship is already exists between two
individuals. We are already related to each other -
whether we recognize it or not.
• We do not have to construct or create
relationship.
• All we need to do is to understand relationship.
• We are part of a family, with the parents,
grandparents, brothers and sisters. We have
neighbours, relatives and friends.
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 Relationship is - between
one Self (I1) and another Self (I2)
• We are connected to the people who are
producing. processing, packaging, marketing,
delivering, repairing all the things we use.
• We are dependent on the people who provide
services to us.
• There are a lot of people who depend on us-
for the goods and services that we produce or
provide.

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 Relationship is - between
one Self (I1) and another Self (I2)
• It is interesting to find out how many people
are involved even in the smallest thing we may
be consuming, like a glass of milk that we may
be having in the morning.
• There is the milkman who delivered the bottle
of milk, the people involved in making the
glass bottle, the people in the dairy, the
farmers growing, harvesting and making the
fodder available and so on.
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 Relationship is - between
one Self (I1) and another Self (I2)
• When we recognize the relationship and see that
it is there, we think in terms of accepting it and
fulfilling it.
• When we don't understand it, the relationship is
still there but we are not able to see it, we are not
able to accept it and therefore, we don't think in
terms of ensuring the fulfilment the relationship
• We have to face the consequences of lack of
fulfilment of relationship and that is a major crisis
we are facing today.
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There are feelings in relationship in one Self for the
other self
• The important issue in human relationship is
the feelings.
• We can see that feelings are in the Self, not in
the Body.
• It is the Self which has the feelings and which
recognizes the feelings.
• To understand relationship, one has to
understand the Self and the feelings in the Self

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There are feelings in relationship in one Self for the
other self
• Feelings like respect and affection are more
important rather than merely the exchange
physical facility.
• For example, you are happy with your
mother's cooking even if it is very simple,
because of the feelings in that relationship.
• You may complain about very similar hostel
mess food, if you haven't realized the feelings
in the relationship with the mess staff
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There are feelings in relationship in one Self for the
other self
• The major crisis we are facing in relationship
today is because of the failure to understand
the Self.
• We are trying to assume relationship on the
basis of body, trying to fulfil relationship on
the basis of body and it does not work.
• If we don't understand the Self, we don't
understand the feelings and therefore, we are
not able to ensure the fulfilment of the feelings
in relationship.
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There are feelings in relationship in one Self for the
other self
• We end up trying to ensure the fulfilment of
the relationship through physical facility.
• Feelings are central to human relationship.
• No amount of physical facility can ensure the
fulfilment of feelings and therefore, no amount
of physical facility alone can ensure fulfilment
in relationship.

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 These feelings can be recognized - they are
definite
There are nine feelings (values) in the relationship:
1. Trust (foundation value)
2. Respect
3. Affection
4. Care
5. Guidance
6. Reverence
7. Glory
8. Gratitude
9. Love (complete value)
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 The fulfilment of these feelings and
their right evaluation lead to mutual
happiness
If I have a feeling of respect, it leads to harmony
within, therefore, happiness within. This feeling of
respect within myself leads to my happiness.
When I share this feeling of respect with you, it
leads to your happiness and that is how it leads to
mutual happiness.
This can be verified for all other feelings-trust,
affection care, gratitude, etc.

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 ‘Trust’ - A foundation value in relationship
• Trust or Vishwas is the foundational value in a
relationship.
• Trust refers to having faith in others and
believing them.
• Mutual trust is a shared belief that we can
depend on each other to achieve a common
purpose.
• Trust-building is not the one-day work. This is a
continuous process.
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 ‘Trust’ - A foundation value in relationship
• One has to be honest in his approach
otherwise trust will vanish.
• False commitment, false talks, and anything
based on lies will erode the trust.

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 ‘Trust’ - A foundation value in relationship
Ask yourself this question: “When do I feel afraid
of somebody, and when do I feel assured?”
The answer is:
• I feel assured of the other person when we are
sure that the other wants to work for my
happiness and prosperity.
• Whenever I feel the other will deny my
happiness and/or prosperity, I am afraid of the
person.
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 ‘Respect’ – as Right evaluation
• Respect means right evaluation.
• When we are rightly evaluated, we feel
respected.
• When we are not rightly evaluated, we feel
disrespected.

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 ‘Respect’ – as Right evaluation

Over Evaluation, Under Evaluation and

Otherwise Evaluation leads to ‘disrespect’
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 Other values:
• Affection: Affection is the feeling of being
related to the other.
• Care: The feeling of responsibility and
commitment for nurturing and protection of
the body of my relative.
• Guidance: It is the feeling of responsibility and
commitment for ensuring the right
understanding and right feeling in the self of
my relative. Guidance is the need of every
human being, not just the children in the
family.
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 Other values:
• Reverence: It is the feeling of acceptance for
excellence.
• Glory: It is the feeling of acceptance for those
who have made effort for excellence.
• Gratitude: It is the feeling of acceptance for
those who have made effort for my
excellence. (Thankfulness)
• Love: It is the feeling of being related to all.

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 Understanding Justice in
human-human relationship
Justice is the recognition, fulfillment and
evaluation of human-human relationship,
leading to mutual happiness.
• Recognition: Recognition of relationship means
unconditionally accepting the relationship.

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 Understanding Justice in
human-human relationship
• Fulfillment: Fulfillment of relationship means,
Ensuring the naturally acceptable feeling in
oneself and sharing it with the other.
Living with responsibility with the other
unconditionally. This makes the other
comfortable and assured.
Making effort for mutual development, i.e.
development of one's own competence and
being of help to the other in developing their
competence.
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 Understanding Justice in
human-human relationship
• Evaluation means verifying that the right
feeling has reached to the other and that the
other is able to make out that it is the right
feeling.

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 Harmony in the Society
• Society denotes the people of a region or country,
sometimes even the world, taken as a whole.
• Family is the first place to understand our
relationships, recognizing the feelings in these
relationships live according to these feelings and
attain mutual happiness.
• Harmony in the family is the building block for
harmony in society.
• Harmony in society leads to an undivided society
when we feel related to each and every human
being.
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 Identification of the
Comprehensive Human Goal
In order to facilitate the fulfillment of the basic
aspirations of all human beings in society, the
following comprehensive human goal needs to be
understood.

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 Identification of the
Comprehensive Human Goal
• Right understanding is necessary for all human
beings. When one does not have the right
understanding, one remains disturbed and
also acts in a manner so as to create
disharmony with other human beings as well
as with the rest of nature.
• Prosperity is needed in every family. Prosperity
in the family means that the family is able to
identify its needs and is able to produce/
achieve more than its requirements.
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 Identification of the
Comprehensive Human Goal
• Trust in society means every member of
society feels related to everyone else and
therefore there is trust and fearlessness.
• Co-existence in nature means there is a
relationship among all the entities in nature
including human beings.
• This is the Comprehensive Human Goal.

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 Universal Human Order
• Undivided Society: (Akhand Samaj)
“The feeling of being related to every human
being.”
• Universal Human Order:
“The feeling of being related to every unit
including human beings and other entities of
nature.”

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 Activities can be performed to spread
the message of holistic society
1. Educating society through Workshops, Seminars
and Street Plays
• This is about organizing workshops, seminars, and
street play at various levels in society. The activity
may be carried out by N.G.O.’s but must receive
the support of government organizations.
2. Value education in Educational Institutions
• Value education should be introduced in the
current education system at all levels – primary
school, secondary school, senior secondary school
as well as college level.
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 Activities can be performed to spread
the message of holistic society
3. Helping to apply values to the real world
• Organizations – both government and non-
government should open up counseling centers
that can help their employees or the general
public to apply values to real-life situations.
• It is about realizing the alternatives in life.

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Dimensions (systems) of Human order
for fulfillment of human goals
1. Education-Sanskar
2. Health-Self regulation
3. Production-work
4. Justice-Preservation
5. Exchange-Storage

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1. Education-Sanskar
Leads to Right Understanding and right feelings
(happiness)
2. Health-Self regulation
Having a system for health and self-regulation
ensures health of the Body. It also helps us in
identifying what is required as physical facility for
nurturing, protection and right utilisation of the
Body which forms the basis for prosperity. This
indirectly ensures co- existence with nature as well.
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3. Production-work
• Work is the effort of a human being does on
the rest of the nature.
• Production is the physical facility derived from
work.
4. Justice-Preservation
• Justice is the recognition, fulfillment and
evaluation of human-human relationship,
leading to mutual happiness.
• Preservation means enrichment, protection
and right utilization of the nature
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5. Exchange-storage
• Exchange means sharing or exchanging of
physical facility with a view of mutual
fulfillment.
• Storage is keeping physical facility with a view
of mutual fulfillment and not with the
obsession for profit or for accumulation or
exploitation.

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