Father to Son

Introduction
The poem ‘Father to Son’ is written by Elizabeth Jennings. The poem is about the anguish of a
father who doesn’t have a good relationship with his son. His son is now grown up and is busy in his
life. The father is bitter about the generation gap between them and the feeling of separation. He
shares his feelings by saying he doesn’t know much about him and there is no sign of
understanding. He wants their relationship to be just like when his son was a child. He is trying his
best to resolve the issue but he is in vain. Therefore, they are drifting apart.

Summary
The poem is about the agony of a father where he rants about the unsettling relationship with his son
who is now a grown-up. He shares that although they had lived together in the same house for
years, he doesn’t understand him. He doesn’t know anything about him and even if he tried to build
up a relationship with him like the one when he was a small child, he was in vain.
He further says that even if his son looks like him, yet he doesn’t know what he loves. He
acknowledges the communication gap and lack of understanding between them and they speak like
strangers. His son is in a different place which he cannot access due to the increasing gap. There is
silence between them. He is ready to forgive his prodigal son. He wants to accept him back to the
house, the one which he always knew. He doesn’t want his son to move around the world. He is
longing to love him.
The son finally speaks up and shares what he feels. He is at a stage where he cannot understand
himself. He feels grief about the growing distance between them and he is angry due to the grief and
sadness. They put out an empty hand towards each other but none of them holds it. They want to
forgive each other yet couldn’t find a solution to the problem.eframe

Explanation
Poem
I do not understand this child
Though we have lived together now
In the same house for years. I know
Nothing of him, so try to build
Up a relationship from how
He was when small. Yet have I killed
Explanation of the Poem – In the above stanza, the poet shares his feelings about his relationship
with his son. He says that although they both had lived together in the same house for many years,
yet he doesn’t understand him. He doesn’t know anything about his son, his likes and dislikes. He
tried to build up a relationship with him from the time he was vain and small. His son has changed as
he has grown up.

Poem
The seed I spent or sown it where
The land is his and none of mine?
We speak like strangers, there’s no sign
Of understanding in the air.
This child is built to my design
Yet what he loves I cannot share.
Word Meaning: Sown – do something which will bring a result
Explanation of the Poem – The father uses ‘I’ in the first line to acknowledge his role in the
communication gap between them. He says that despite all efforts, his son was in another place that
the father cannot access. They used to talk to each other like strangers and there was no sign of
understanding between them. His child used to look like him and yet he didn’t know what his son
loved.

Poem
Silence surrounds us. I would have
Him prodigal, returning to
His father’s house, the home he knew,
Rather than see him make and move
His world. I would forgive him too,
Shaping from sorrow a new love.
Word Meaning: Prodigal – spending money freely
Explanation of the Poem – There is silence between them. As a child, he was a prodigal son and
now his father wanted him to return to his house, the one he knew. He didn’t want his son to move
around and make his own world.He was ready to forgive him and let go of the sorrows he had inside
because of him, because of the distance between them. He wanted to love him again.

Poem
Father and son, we both must live
On the same globe and the same land,
He speaks: I cannot understand
Myself, why anger grows from grief.
We each put out an empty hand,
Longing for something to forgive.
Word Meaning: Grief – sorrow, sadness
Explanation of the Poem – The son speaks for the first time and explains what he feels. He also
feels sad about the distance between them. He shares that he is at a point where he doesn’t
understand himself. His anger arises out of his sadness. It is quite clear that on both sides lies the
same frustration about the gap in their relationship. They both want to forgive each other and yet
they cannot find a solution to the problem. Both of them put out an empty hand for the other to seek,
always in vain.

Literary Devices
Simile – a figure of speech that makes comparison and shows similarities between two things
We speak like strangers
Alliteration – The occurrence of the same letter or sound at the beginning of closely connected
words
The seed I spent or sown it where – ‘s’ sound
Silence surrounds us
Metaphor – an indirect comparsion between a quality shared by two persons or things
The seed I spent or sown it where
The land is his and none of mine?
I would have
Him prodigal, returning to
His father’s house
 QUESTION- ANSWER
1. Does the poem talk of an exclusively personal experience or is it fairly universal?
Ans: The poem ‘Father to Son’ talks about a fairly universal experience. When a child is growing up,
the father is usually busy with his work and is not able to take out time for his child. When the father
grows older and has free time, his son gets involved in his life and has no time for his old father. This
cycle is universal.

2. How is the father’s helplessness brought out in the poem?

Ans: The father’s helplessness is brought out in the poem by these lines: ‘I do not understand this
child, Though we have lived together now, In the same house for years.’ ‘He speaks: I cannot
understand Myself, why anger grows from grief.’ ‘Yet what he loves I cannot share’ and ‘I know
Nothing of him’.
These lines indicate how he wanted to make a relationship with his son better and now as his son
was like a stranger to him, they both put out an empty hand to each other and remain in vain.

3. Identify the phrases and lines that indicate distance between father and son.
Ans: The phrases and lines that indicate the distance between both of them are: ‘I do not
understand this child, Though we have lived together now, In the same house for years.’ ‘He speaks:
I cannot understand Myself, why anger grows from grief.’ ‘Yet what he loves I cannot share’ ‘I know
Nothing of him’ and ‘Silence surrounds us’.

4. Does the poem have a consistent rhyme scheme?

Ans: The poem has a consistent rhyme scheme with an open verse format. The short sentences are
juxtaposed with longer sentences.

Extract Based Questions

A. I do not understand this child
Though we have lived together now
In the same house for years. I know
Nothing of him, so try to build
Up a relationship from how
He was when small.

Q1. Who has lived in the same house? How long?

Ans. The father and son had shared the same home for a long time.

Q2. Why does the father say that he knows nothing of him?
Ans. They coexist in the same home as strangers. While they are with each other, there is complete
silence all around them. He claims to know nothing about his son as a result.

Q3. What kind of relationship does he want to build up?

Ans. He hopes to have a bond with his son that is similar to the one he had with his son when he
himself was younger.

B. Yet have I killed

The seed I spent or sown it where
The land is his and none of mine?
We speak like strangers, there’s no sign
Of understanding in the air.
Q1. What does the word ‘seed’ signify?
Ans. The father’s labor-intensive efforts to raise the child are referred to as the “seed” here in this
context.

Q2. What ‘land’ does the speaker speak of?

Ans. The father attempted to plant the seeds of his thoughts in the child’s mind.

Q3. Why do they speak like strangers?

Ans. People speak strangely because they have various outlooks and ways of thinking.

C. This child is built to my design

Yet what he loves I cannot share.
Silence surrounds us.
I would have him prodigal, returning to
His father’s house, the home he knew,
Rather than see him make and move
His world. I would forgive him too,
Shaping from sorrow a new love.

Q1. What kind of child had he desired to design?

Ans. He had hoped to create a child that shared his preferences.

Q2. Why does the speaker say ‘this child’ not ‘my child’?
Ans. The speaker says ‘this child’ not ‘my child’ since they don’t share anything in common.

Q3. Explain: ‘Silence surrounds us’.

Ans. The father and son have almost no communication. When they are near each other, there is
complete silence.

Q4. What does the father want his son to do?

Ans. He desires that his son visit his father again.

Q5. What is the father prepared to accept?

Ans. He is willing to accept his kid in all of his affluence.

Q6. What does the father not want his son to do?
Ans. The father does not want his son to create and settle in a new world of his own.

Q7. What would the father do to shape a new love from sorrow?
Ans. He would absolve his son of any suffering he may have caused.
D. Father and son, we both must live
On the same globe and the same land.
He speaks: I cannot understand
Myself, why anger grows from grief.
We each put out an empty hand,

Q1. How does the poet feel when his relationship with his son comes under strain?
Ans. The poet is anxious to maintain the family links with his son. He desires that the son returns to
his former home.

Q2. What could be the cause for their distancing from each other?
Ans. The growing gulf between the father and his son is due to a lack of understanding. Each is in
need of the other, yet due to ego issues, they split apart.
Q3. What do both father and son long for?
Ans. They yearn for a reason to pardon one another.

Q4. What do the words ‘an empty hand’ signify?

Ans. The phrase “an empty hand” refers to the fact that neither the father nor the son have benefited
from their current condition of separation. Both of them are empty handed.

Q5. What can’t the father understand?

Ans. The father is perplexed as to why his grief makes him angry.

Q6. Does the poem have a consistent rhyme scheme?

Ans. Yes, the rhyme scheme in each stanza is abbaba.

Question Answers (including questions from Previous

Years Question Papers)
Q1. Why is the father unable to understand his son in ‘Father to Son’?
Ans. Due to miscommunication and the generational divide, the father in the poem “Father to Son”
cannot understand his son. Though he and his son lived together in the same house but they did not
share any love or interests, therefore, he does not understand him.

Q2. Why is the father unhappy with his son?

Ans. Even though they share a home, the father is upset with his son since they never connect.
They coexist like strangers and cannot understand one another. They even have no common
interests.

Q3. ‘I would have him prodigal.’ What does the father in Elizabeth Jennings’ poem mean by
this?
Ans. Just as the prodigal son did in the biblical tale, the father desires for his son to come back to
him. The son was an idler and wastrel. He moved away from home. But every time he came back
after a long absence, the father would rejoice.

Q4. What does the father feel about this stranger-like relationship with his son? Does he wish
to change it?
Ans. This strange-like relationship bothers the father. Naturally, he wants to change it since he is
willing to accept his prodigal son. He is thrilled to begin sharing a home with him.

Q5. The anguish of the father comes through very strongly in the poem. Show his feelings
about his son as expressed in the poem.
Ans. The father is more confused and upset. He regrets having missed out on chances to develop a
bond with his son. In order to keep his prodigal son in the same home where they all live with love
and respect, he wants to establish excellent relations with him.

Q6. What kind of relationship do the father and the son share? Why is it so?
Ans. The father and son have an estranged relationship. Despite living under the same roof, they
behave as strangers. Their interests are completely unrelated. What his son enjoys, the father keeps
to himself. Because there is a communication gap between the two, there is no understanding.

Q7. Why does the father feel he and his son are like strangers to each other?
Ans. Due to the lack of engagement between the father and son, the father feels as though they are
like strangers to one another. They do not even have a shared interest because there is no affection,
warmth, or understanding between them. Despite years of living together, there is a communication
gap between them.

Long Answer Questions Poem

CBQ
1. The lesson reflects the realities of modern times. The aged persons face problems and
there is no end to it. How do you feel about it?
Ans. The breakdown of the united family system and the shift in our cultural values have caused
grave issues for the elderly. Due to their children’s involvement in their own problems, they are
denied support on a physical, moral, financial, and emotional level. The elderly are experiencing a
sense of unwanted presence. Hatred, disdain, apathy, and insults are the predominant attitudes
towards the elderly. This causes them to fall into a bottomless pit of depression. The worst victims
are, by far, elderly people without a source of income. The biggest offender is an increase in
materialism. No longer is blood thicker than water. An elderly individual who stands in the way of the
heirs receiving their inheritance becomes a pain in their side. Many begin killing the elderly by
torturing them.
The only things that the elderly need are love, kindness, and respect. So, the kids must adopt a new
mentality. They must not ignore the very thing that gives them life.

2. What sort of father-son relationship has been depicted in the poem ‘Father to Son?
Ans. The poem portrays a father-son relationship that is merely symbolic. The two had shared a
home together for many years. Even then the father does not understand his son. He acknowledges
that he has no knowledge about his son. They no longer share an affectionate connection. They
have become formal just like strangers. Although the son looks physically similar to his father, he
always had his own vision, dreams, and aspirations. He is not confined to his home and is not
averse to travelling. The protective father is willing to forgive him for incurring loss of material wealth
provided he returns home. The father feels completely helpless, furious, and distraught as a result of
the awful experience of being unable to communicate. His attempts to mend the relationship fall
short as there is no response from the other side.

3. How far has the poet succeeded in transforming a purely personal matter to a universal
experience prevalent in modern times?
Ans. The poem opens with a tone of autobiography. The father, who is speaking, describes his own
experience. He discusses the dysfunctional father-son bond. The father has no knowledge of his son
and neither does he understand him. Even though they share a home, the father and son’s distance
has widened. They are unable to communicate with one another. Either they converse like strangers
or there is quiet all around them. The son’s preferences are a secret to the father. The distance has
grown too far, which is regrettable. Even so, the father is eager to create a new bond and mould a
new love. His anguish manifests as rage, and they are unable to come to a settlement. This
relationship maladjustment or increasing family separation is typical of today’s materialistic age.

4. Why in your view has a sense of distance arrived in the modern youth?
Ans. All the traditional moral, ethical, social, and cultural values have been lost in the modern age.
The strong feeling of a single family structure is significantly fading. The newlyweds desire to live a
life of independence away from their parents. They believe that their freedom will be restricted by the
combined family or parents who live with them.
They are unable to recognise their parents’ true value and yearn for a greater separation from them.
The western society and the media have enveloped their ideas. They have absolutely no interest in
civility. Thus, among young people, distance is deeply ingrained.They do not understand the
responsibilities they have for their elderly parents and instead view them as an additional burden.
Thus, among today’s youth, a sense of distance has become fashionable.

5. What is the central idea of the poem “Father to Son”?

Ans. The poem centres on the tension between a father and son who have major communication
gaps. Despite sharing a house , they are like strangers to one another. This is what the father muses
over, and it serves as the poem’s focal point. He thinks of himself in terms of farming, feeling as
though he has planted his seed on someone else’s property, which prevents him from owning it. He
acknowledges that he is unable to share his son’s interests with him and anticipates that he will
return home like the lost son in the tale of Jesus in the Bible. He is prepared to provide forgiveness
to him and create new love out of grief. However, his son acknowledges the futile efforts made by
both parties to understand one another and feels anger developing from sadness.