Ephesians 6:1–2 .“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
‘Honor
your father and mother’—which is the first commandment with a promise.”
Story .
Carlo sat on the rough wooden bench of his prison cell, staring at the cracks in the
wall. At only twenty-seven years old, he was waiting for his final sentence. His
crimes had shocked the town: theft, violence, and betrayal of friends. As he counted
the days, a question haunted him—“Who is to blame? My parents… or me?”
He thought back to his childhood. His father was a tricycle driver, working long
hours to feed the family. His mother sold vegetables in the market. They didn’t have
much, but they gave what they could. Every evening, his mother would call, “Carlo,
come eat!” and his father would say, “Son, always walk the right path. Don’t waste
your life.”
But as Carlo grew older, he found new “friends” who offered excitement and quick
money. They told him rules were for the weak, that freedom meant doing whatever
you wanted. His parents warned him. His father even caught him once sneaking out
late at night. “Son, these friends will destroy you,” he pleaded. But Carlo shrugged
it off.
Soon, one mistake led to another. Small thefts became big crimes. By the time he
realized how far he had gone, the police were already chasing him. His parents
visited him in jail, tears in their eyes. His mother held his hands through the bars
and whispered, “We taught you better than this. Why didn’t you listen?”
That night, Carlo wrestled with the truth. Could he blame his parents?
I. The Blessings and Challenges of Children
So I want to start by talking about the blessings and challenges of children. Children
are one of the greatest blessings that God can ever bring into your life. They are
endlessly fascinating, endlessly unpredictable. Biblical blessing, Psalm 127 it
says, “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord. The fruit of the womb is a
reward.
Children are a Gift from God
“Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him.” (Psalm 127:3)
They are not possessions but precious blessings entrusted by God.
Source of Joy and Gladness
“May your father and mother rejoice; may she who gave you birth be joyful!”
(Proverbs 23:25)
Children bring laughter, comfort, and happiness to families.
They Teach Us About Faith and Humility
“Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never
enter the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 18:3)
They Are a Legacy and Future Hope
“Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth.” (Psalm
127:4)
Children carry on the family’s values and faith, ensuring God’s work continues to
future generations.
Fresh Ideas – Teens are exposed to new technologies, trends, and ways of
thinking, which can inspire families to adapt and grow.
Developing Talents – This stage allows parents to witness the blossoming of
their children’s unique gifts in academics, sports, arts, or leadership.
Companionship and Connection – Teens can develop deeper conversations
and meaningful relationships with parents as they grow in understanding.
Hope for the Future – Their dreams, goals, and potential give families a sense
of purpose and continuity.
Challenges of Children, Especially Teens
Search for Identity – Teens often struggle with self-discovery, which can lead to
confusion, mood swings, or clashes with authority.
Peer Pressure – The influence of friends can sometimes conflict with family values,
leading to risky behavior.
Desire for Independence – They may push boundaries, resist rules, and question
authority as they seek freedom.
Communication Gap – Misunderstandings between parents and teens are common
due to generational and emotional differences.
Emotional Ups and Downs – Hormonal changes may cause irritability, stress, or
sudden changes in attitude.
Exposure to Technology and Media – Social media, gadgets, and online influences
can shape their mindset, sometimes negatively.
Academic and Social Pressures – Balancing studies, relationships, and
responsibilities can overwhelm them.
Let me share with you the 5 A’s every child needs:
1. Affection – Our children need to feel loved, not just through providing food
and shelter, but through warm hugs, kind words, and tender actions. A child
who never hears “I love you” may grow up doubting if anyone truly does.
2. Attention – Our teenagers often feel unheard. They need us to pause, put
down our phones, and listen to their stories, their struggles, and even their
silence. Sometimes the most powerful message we can give is: “I’m here for
you.”
3. Appreciation – Every child longs to be seen and valued. A simple “I’m proud
of you” can strengthen their heart more than a hundred criticisms. Without
appreciation, a teen may chase approval from the world, where it may not
always be safe.
4. Authority – Children need guidance, not harshness, but firm and loving
discipline. Proverbs 22:6 reminds us: “Train up a child in the way he should
go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Authority is not about
control; it’s about direction.
5. Acceptance – Perhaps the hardest and the most important. Our teens need
to know they are accepted for who they are — with their flaws, mistakes, and
imperfections. Just as God accepts us through His grace, we must accept our
children with unconditional love.
💔 Heartbreaking Truth:
Too many children today grow up starved of these 5 A’s. Some search for affection
in broken relationships, some crave attention on social media, some hunger for
appreciation but only meet criticism, some rebel against authority that is too harsh
or too absent, and some feel rejected in their own homes.
💖 Warming Hope:
But if we, as parents, teachers, and spiritual leaders, give them these 5 A’s, we give
them more than just love — we give them roots to stand firm and wings to soar
high. Our children are arrows in our hands; if we release them with love and
guidance, they will fly straight into the future God has prepared for them.
WHAT THEN MUST BE THE OBLIGATIONS OF A CHILD?
1,Affection – A Mother’s Hug You Ought to Love Your Parents.
Imagine your mother cooking late at night even though she is tired. You walk past
her without saying anything. But one day, when she is gone, you will miss even the
smell of her cooking. A simple hug today can mean the world to her.
👉 Lesson: Don’t wait for “someday” to show love. Affection shown now will be
remembered forever.
If you love them, you will strive in all things to please them. We are always anxious
to please those we love and to avoid anything that would cause them pain. If you
love them, you will desire their good opinion
2. Acknowledgment (You Ought to Respect your Parents.)
Honor," says the commandment, "your father and mother." This respect has respect
to your feelings, your words, and your actions. It consists in part of an inward
consciousness of their superiority, and an endeavor to cherish a reverential frame of
mind towards them, as placed by God over you. There must be high thoughts of
their superiority, both natural and instituted, and a submission of the heart to
their authority, in a way of sincere and profound respect. Even your love
must be that which is exercised and expressed towards a superior. If there be no
respect of the heart, it cannot be expected in the conduct. In all virtue, whether it
be that higher kind which has respect to God, or that secondary kind, which relates
to our fellow creatures, we must have a right state of heart; for without this, virtue
does not exist.Respect should extend to all your behavior towards your parents. In
all your conduct towards them, give them the greatest honor; let others observe
that you pay them all possible respect, and let it also be seen by themselves, when
there is no spectator near.
3.Adherence (Obedience/Respect for Authority) – The Guardrail on the
Road.You Ought to Obey Your Parents.
When riding in the mountains, you see strong guardrails on the edge of the road.
They may seem restricting, but they save lives. Parents’ rules feel the same —
sometimes limiting, but truly protecting.
👉 Lesson: Obedience is not to cage you, but to keep you safe from dangers you do
not yet see.
"Children obey your parents," says the apostle in his epistle to the Colossians. This
is one of the most obvious dictates of nature; even the irrational creatures are
obedient by instinct, and follow the signs of the parent animal, or bird, or reptile.
Perhaps there is no duty more generally acknowledged than this. Your obedience
should begin early—the younger you are, the more you need a guide and a ruler.
Obedience should be universal—"Children obey your parents," said the apostle, "in
all things." The only exception to this, is when their commands are, in the letter or
spirit of them, opposed to the commands of God.
4. Appreciation – The Pair of Shoes
A teen complains about not having branded shoes, but never notices the worn-out
slippers his father uses daily because he spent money on the child’s needs instead.
👉 Lesson: Gratitude opens your eyes to sacrifices you never saw before. A simple
“thank you” is like medicine to a parent’s tired heart.
5.Ask.. It is the Duty of Children to Consult their Parents.
Your parents are the guides of your youth; your natural counselors; the family
teachers, which you are ever to consult, and the responses of which are to be
received with pious respect You are young and inexperienced; the path of life is in a
considerable degree untrodden by you, and perplexities are perpetually arising,
which you have yet acquired no experience to understand, nor to deal properly with.
They have traveled the road, and know its turnings, its dangers, and its difficulties.
Go to your parents, then, with every concern; consult them on the subject of
companions, books, recreations. Let a father's and a mother's ear be the receptacle
of all your cares. Have no secrets which you conceal from them.
