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th e backdoor
THE PIONEER LOG Youre right, Clark was probably more of a bottom ... or maybe a verse-power-otter-bottom?
SEPTEMBER 27, 2013
Letter to the Copeland community
Dear fucker-who-stolemy-newly-purchased-Gap -sweater-from-the-E-winglaundry-room, I will find you. Signed, No fucks given*
For sale now on The Green
Have you visited The Green at Lewis & Clark? If you search The Green at Lewis & Clark online, you can find things for sale, available housing and other services from fellow Pioneers. Somebody described it to me as the LC communitys Craigslist. Here is a sample of what youll find on the website for The Green at LC:
Want your comics published?
The Backdoor is seeking a weekly comic strip and cartoon submissions. If youre interested (and funny), email twpatterson@lclark.edu for more details.
FOR SALE:
Mattress for sale!!!! GOOD CONDITION FEW FLAWS... 40 dollars Extra Long Twin mattress for sale. Found near ravine. Good condition. Globe.... $35 Its a globe. Cmon guys! GLOBE STILL FOR SALE... NOW JUST $30 why arent yall interested? its vintage! it will look great on ur copeland diagonal desk!!! Buttons by Betty... $5 For sale 7:30 a.m. - 1:00 p.m. outside Fields. Flex points accepted. Respond to see full selection.
You Caught My Eye
You: Wearing a trench coat and black glasses in a rainstorm at night. Me: Wanting to take the red pill and join you in the rage against the machines. Me: Owner of the hippie van parked outside Holmes. You: Willing to help you make it into a love machine. You: Walking out of Platt looking like Michael Cera, while alt music blasts from a distant window. Me: Realizing that we are living on the set of an indie movie. The backdoor is a work of humor and fiction.
This weeks contributers are Caitlin Degnon, Drake MacFarlane and Tyler Wayne Patterson.
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PERSONALS:
F4F Ladies? Female looking for sassy girl with dreads. Some one I can trade Doc Martins with. Why is one so hard to find? Straight boys? Ive been searching for a straight boy??? I need a date for Fall Ball. Where are all of you? M4M OMG LYKE WHERE ARE THERE NO GAY BOYS AT LEWIS & CLARK?!! I keep posting Missed Connections, but cannot find any gay boys. Where are they? Queer men? I really wish Lewis & Clark had more queer boys. Ive been looking for a nice boy, but cant find any. They must not exsist. Respond if gay. IS NE1 GAY!?!? I swear, this College has no gay boys for being a Liberal Arts College. CollegeProwler.com lied F4M
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*For those with fucks given, email twpatterson@lclark.edu.
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