KAT KONG
NARRATOR
One dark and perilous night, three
mouse explorers sailed toward a
strange, uncharted island. Captain
Charles Limburger steered the tiny
vessel, while Doctor Vincent
Varmint and his beautiful
assistant, Rosie Rodent, looked on.
When they reached the island, the
three explorers were astonished. A
group of natives was performing an
ancient ceremony, offering up a
sacrificial can of tuna fish and
repeating a mysterious chant:
NATIVES
Heeeer, Ki-tee Ki-tee! Heeeer, Ki-
tee Ki-tee Ki-tee! Heeeer, Ki-tee
Ki-tee Ki-tee!
NARRATOR
Suddenly, the island began to
tremble. Crashing through the thick
forest came the most frightening
creature ever known to mousekind:
the mighty Kat Kong!
NICK
Quite often, we do not evaluate the
consequences of our choices. When
Dr. Vincent Varmint brings the
monstrous creature Kat Kong back to
Mousopolis, he fails to consider
that the monster may… escape from
its bonds, maybe destroy the town,
kidnap the attractive female co-
star, and possibly lead itself to
its own demise. Had he thought of
this, he might have also raised
other questions in himself, such
as: Did curiosity, in fact, kill
the cat? What will be the fate of
the butcher’s beef tongue? And when
do we ourselves become the
monsters? All this and more will be
explored in the literary
masterpiece, Kat Kong, by Dav
Pilkey.
NARRATOR
Meowing and hissing ferociously
(meow and hiss), the colossal cat
2.
took three giant kitty steps… and
tripped over the tuna fish can.
(Fall) KLUNK! Kat Kong bumped his
head on the ground and was knocked
out cold.
VARMINT
If only we could bring him back to
the city with us…
NARRATOR
Said Doctor Varmint.
ROSIE
No.
NARRATOR
Replied Rosie.
ROSIE
It would be wrong to take this
creature away from its natural
habitat just to satisfy our
scientific curiosity.
VARMINT
Forget science-
NARRATOR
Squeaked Doctor Varmint.
VARMINT
Think of the money we could make!
NARRATOR
So the three explorers wrapped Kat
Kong in a giant burlap bag and tied
him tightly to the ship. As they
sailed back to the great city of
Mousopolis, they took special care
not to let the cat out of the bag.
Several days later in downtown
Mousopolis, Doctor Varmint unveiled
his discovery to a sold-out crowd.
VARMINT
Ladies and gentlemice. I give you
Kat Kong: the nine-lived wonder of
the world!
NARRATOR
The audience cheered. Kat Kong,
however, was not amused. The
towering tomcat hissed and meowed
wildly. (Hiss and meow wildly)
VARMINT
Do not be afraid, there is no way
3.
this creature can escape! I repeat
there is NO WAY this creature can
escape!... well… (look up)
actually, I could be wrong about
that. FLEE FOR YOUR LIVES!! FIND A
SMALL CHILD, SHIELD YOURSELF BEHIND
IT!
NARRATOR
Soon, the city of Mousopolis was in
a panic. The ferocious feline tore
through the streets, knocking down
buildings, ripping out power lines,
and generally causing quite a
ruckus! Captain Charles Limburger
rushed off to organize a
counterattack team, while the
beautiful Rosie watched the
destruction from her apartment
window.
ENGINEER
Help!
NARRATOR
Cried the engineer.
ENGINEER
The cat’s got my train.
Be Kat Kong, grabbing the train.
BUTCHER
HELP!
NARRATOR
Squeaked the butcher.
BUTCHER
The cat’s got my tongue!
Kat Kong grabs the beef tongue and savagely devours it.
ROSIE
HELP!
NARRATOR
Shrieked Rosie.
ROSIE
THE CAT’S GOT ME! (Kat Kong pulls
her out of the building.)
NARRATOR
Soon the crazed cat was heading
straight for the top of the Romano
Inn, with the beautiful Rosie
tailing behind! A fleet of
4.
airplanes quickly flew into action,
but their weapons were useless
against the meowing menace.
Assorted machine gun fire and cat meows, batting away
the airplanes.
AIRPLANE MOUSE
I’ve been hit! (he rockets to the
ground in an explosion)
NARRATOR
Then, suddenly, a squeaking ray of
hope rocketed through the thick
clouds of gloom and despair.
Captain Charles Limburger to the
rescue! (Limburger flies in his
plane) Limburger had a plan. He
swooped close to Kat Kong and held
out a red package tied with gold
ribbons.
LIMBURGER
Hey, Kat! Look what I’ve got!
NARRATOR
He circled again, shouting.
LIMBURGER
You’ll never guess what’s inside
this package!
NARRATOR
Kat Kong stared intensely…
intensely… intensely (shake head)
at the red package. With each
passing second, the colossal
kitty’s interest grew and grew.
Finally, Kat Kong could stand it no
longer- he had to find out what was
inside that package! With one swift
paw, the puzzled pussycat reached
out for the red package, and lost
his balance.
KAT KONG
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEOOOOOOOWWW
WWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!
NARRATOR
When the dust settled, a crowd of
mice gathered to view the final
resting place of the mighty Kat
Kong.
RANDOM MOUSE
He’s fallen.
5.
RANDOM MOUSE 2
And he can‘t get up.
CHIEF
Well…
NARRATOR
Said the chief of police.
CHIEF
It looks as if beauty killed the
beast.
VARMINT
No.
NARRATOR
Said Doctor Varmint as he looked
sadly into the glowing red horizon.
VARMINT
It was curiosity. Curiosity killed
the cat!
