"Our New Electrical Morals" Pitch
Uploaded by
Fred Seibert"Our New Electrical Morals" Pitch
Uploaded by
Fred Seibert*train noises*
PAN PAN
Panel 1 Panel 2
Douglas: Ding dong! Business Cat, Im
here for the shareholders meeting.
PAN
Panel 3 Panel 4
Business Cat: Right on schedule.
Panel 5 Panel 6
BC: First order of business, are we
still on for jelly jam sandwiches at
six?
D: Im warming them up in my hat right
now with brain-power.
Panel 7 Panel 8
Delta blues crooner: Jeeeeeeeellyyy
hrrrmmmm jaaaaaaaam!
BC: Good.
Panel 9 Panel 10
(pause)
BC: Thats all I have. Any new business
with you?
D: I found this dumb baby.
Panel 11 Panel 12
*dumb baby noise* BC: A dumb baby? Whose dumb baby?
Panel 13 Panel 14
D: I dunno. It was just on the ground
being stupid, so I picked it up.
D: Well be your dads until we find your
actual dumb parents.
Panel 15 Panel 16
BC: Dumb babies are expensive and bad
for business. How can we turn this
crisis around?
D: Dont ask me. Youre the Business
Cat.
BC: Yes.
Panel 17 Panel 18
BC: I am the Business Cat. BC: We should invest money in the baby
for future gains. Here.
Panel 19 Panel 20
BC: Put these dollars in its mouth. *baby coo*
Panel 21 Panel 22
BC: Is it generating any profit?
Panel 23
Panel 24
D: Its generating something ... BC: This is no good. One might say this
is the opposite of good.
Panel 25 Panel 26
D: You think the babys ... D: Evil?!
*dramatic music cue*
ZOOM IN
Panel 27 Panel 28
Liquid Assets
BC: Since the arrival of this baby, our
liquid assets have plunged 80,000
percent.
BC: If this trend continues, we will
have infinitely negative liquid assets
by the end of the quarter.
*Camera follows moving arrow*
Liquid Assets
CAMERA PAN
Panel 29 Panel 30
L
iq
u
id
A
s
s
e
ts
BC: Douglas, go find that voodoo-babys
parents before it ruins the business. Or
Ill dispose of it myself.
Panel 31
D: But where are they?
Panel 32
Liquid Assets
*Wendy and Brian play keyboard and drum
machine, respectively*
Wendy: That was good, but youre coming
in with the beats too early. Wait for
the arpeggios.
Panel 33 Panel 34
D (O.S.): Haunted baby incoming! W: Ah!
Panel 35 Panel 36
D: Ha ha, Wendy. You drop babies harder
than your robot-thing drops fat beats.
*happy baby coo*
W: What are you doing with a baby?
WALKS
PAST
Panel 37 Panel 38
D: Finding it a home. Is it yours?
W: No.
W: Its cute. And sticky.
Panel 39 Panel 40
*cracking noises*
W: Wait, why do you think its mine?
D: You can give up the charade, Wendy.
D: It got its grubby fingers into my
jelly jam.
DBC: Jeeellllyy jaaaaam, gettin babies
all stickyyyyy.
Panel 41 Panel 42
*more cracking noises*
D: Business Cat told me all about your
baby prison.
Panel 43 Panel 44
*ground shakes, tank noises* W: Please dont call my uterus a baby
prison.
Panel 45 Panel 46
BC: Douglas, I purchased this expensive
tank to protect us from financial
bankruptcy.
D: Dont shoot! Ill confess government
secrets!
PAN
Panel 47 Panel 48
BC: And its that babys fault. BC: Coincidentally, we are now bankrupt.
Panel 49 Panel 50
BC: Or baby momma. BC: Deliver it to that baby daddy.
Panel 51 Panel 52
BC: Maybe deliver it to inside this tank
gun.
W: Im voting against the tank-gun idea.
BC: Or both.
Panel 53 Panel 54
D: No tank guns. Business Cat, I motion
for an emergency shareholders meeting.
BC: Well Im voting for it twice.
Panel 55 Panel 56
BC: Sorry, Wendy. Shareholders only. BC: Motion granted. You may enter the
tank.
Panel 57 Panel 58
W: You owe me, like, twelve dollars,
Business Cat, which means I basically
own most of the business.
Panel 59 Panel 60
D: No girls.
Panel 61 Panel 62
D: Wow, its really hot and muggy in
here.
BC: Yep.
Panel 63 Panel 64
*quiet dramatic music*
BC: Enough of this nonsense. We cant
afford having that baby around any
longer.
*louder dramatic music*
D: It needs a home thats not the
ground. We should take care of it.
Panel 65 Panel 66
*even louder dramatic music*
BC: If you dont lose that baby, Ill
lose that baby for you.
*even louder dramatic musi0c*
D: Youll have to get through me first,
cat man.
Panel 67 Panel 68
*deafening dramatic music*
*BC raises and flips a switchblade*
D: Looks like somebodys cruising for a
bruising.
Panel 69 Panel 70
*hatch opens as music cuts* W: This kids stomach is growling. Do
you have any baby food on you? Like
mushy fruit preserves?
Panel 71 Panel 72
D: We cant find your parents, but we
cant afford to feed you our jelly jam.
Panel 73
Panel 74
D: I guess ... BC: (pounding palm) Its too precious a
commodity.
Panel 75 Panel 76
BC: Heres a knife in case any hobos
give you trouble.
Panel 77 Panel 78
D: This is goodbye.
BC: Forge your own path into the future.
Rely on yourself.
BC: A lot of babies with missing parents
become totally rad adults. So do that.
Grow up and be rad.
Panel 79 Panel 80
BC: Let it go, Douglas. Its a baby of
the rails now. Its free.
*train whistle*
Panel 81 Panel 82
*train noises and shadows rumble by*
D: This isnt right!
D: We should have raised him as our own.
Panel 83 Panel 84
D: I did toss him around like a
football.
BC: Douglas, that babys safer on the
rails than with us. Wed make terrible
parents.
Panel 85 Panel 86
BC: With us out of the equation, that
baby has a slightly higher probability
of being just fine.
BC: I gave that kid my shanking knife.
Do you know how irresponsible that was?
Panel 87 Panel 88
*blinding light*
DBC: Teerrrrible paaaarents, they gave a
knife to a baaaaby!
T
E
R
R
I
B
L
E
P
A
REN
T
S
*sci-fi noises*
Panel 89 Panel 90
Time Buffalo: Guys! Have you seen a baby
around here?
D: No, Time Buffalo. Thankfully, all
babies are now a safe distance away from
us.
Panel 91 Panel 92
*camera zooms in and spins*
TB: Oh man, if I dont get that baby
back to the 1930s, the parodox will
destabalize the timeline and--
*cracking noises*
TB: Our realm is already collapsing!
Quick, we need to search the premises
before--
Panel 93 Panel 94
BC: Stop trying to impress us with your
lame-o adventures, Time Buffalo.
Panel 95
TB: But the timeline--
D: Cmon. Lets go eat some funky fresh
jelly jam sandwiches.
DBC: (reflectively) Jelly jam.
Panel 96