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Academic Essay Feedback

1) The document discusses feedback on student essays analyzing rhetorical devices and arguments. 2) Comments suggest focusing more on how rhetorical techniques strengthen arguments and impact readers, and providing more examples and evidence from the texts. 3) Reviewers ask for clarification on how certain points fit within the BEAM framework and whether some analyses of writing methods are within the scope of the assigned topic.

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73 views1 page

Academic Essay Feedback

1) The document discusses feedback on student essays analyzing rhetorical devices and arguments. 2) Comments suggest focusing more on how rhetorical techniques strengthen arguments and impact readers, and providing more examples and evidence from the texts. 3) Reviewers ask for clarification on how certain points fit within the BEAM framework and whether some analyses of writing methods are within the scope of the assigned topic.

Uploaded by

api-335278645
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
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Yesenia Garnica

Julian:
I don't think this answers what part of her essay is the A in BEAM. Perhaps be more clear in how
and where her argument can be found in her essay?
I think you are focusing too much on the content of her essay and not enough on the rhetoric
right here. Perhaps you can elaborate more on how using the personal narrative strengthens her
argument/ what does it emphasize/ what effect does it have on the reader ?
Rephrase?? -The so what why does it matter part of her essay is simply that she believes that
the acknowledgement of personal narrative would allow working class students better flourish
Katia:
You talked about the use of anaphora earlier in yours essay. Is it necessary to talk about it here
again/ would it make sense to talk about it again here ?
You focus a lot on the content of Robillard's essay, rather than the structure. Your conclusion
misleads the reader since you do not talk about the rhetorical devices.
I think the point you make here is good, but it's difficult to see that this is the direction you are
going in while reading the paragraph. You are focusing too much on the content and analyzing
the meaning of her essay, rather than analyzing the rhetoric. The shift in tone is a good point to
talk about but I don't think you provide enough evidence and you don't really talk about that shift
too much.
How ?- Robillards tone and use of anaphora in this segment calls to attention the unjust
standards the academy prides itself on.
Include an example (quote)?
Jennifer:
How do the questions she incorporates do this ?
I think you starting steering away from what "method" means in BEAM. You started out by
stating that it has to do with terminology and now you are stating that it has to do with writing
methods and structures. It is a valid point to make, but I'm just not sure if it should go there in
your paper ?
I don't think this is the point you are trying to make in this essay ?

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