Ω +

                     + You've been living a while in the front of my skull, making --He brought me out into the hall (I could have sworn it Suddenly every machine stopped at once
I wish that I had known in orders was haunted) And the monitors beeped the last time
That first minute we met You've been writing me rules, shrinking maps and And told me something that I didn't know that I wanted to Hundreds of thousands of hospital beds
The unpayable debt redrawing borders hear: And all of them empty but mine
That I owed you I've been repeating your speeches, but the audience just That there was nothing that I could do to save you
doesn't follow The choir's going to sing, and this thing is going to kill you Well, I was lying down with my feet in the air
Because you'd been abused Because I'm leaving out words, punctuations, and it sounds Something in my throat made my next words shake Completely unable to move
By the bone that refused you pretty hollow And something in the wires made the lightbulbs break The bed was misshaped, and awkward and tall
And you hired me --I've been living in bed because now you tell me to sleep There was glass inside my feet and raining down from the And clearly intended for you
To make up for that I've been hiding my voice and my face and you decide ceiling
when I eat It opened up the scars that had just finished healing You checked yourself out when you put me to bed
And walking in that room --In your dreams I'm a criminal, horrible, sleeping around It tore apart the canyon running down your femur And tore that old band off your wrist
When you had tubes in your arms While you're awake I'm impossible, constantly letting you (I thought that it was beautiful, it made me a believer) But you came back to see me for a minute or less
Those singing morphine alarms down And as it opened I could hear you howling from your room And left me your ring in my fist
Out of tune --Little porcelain figurines, glass bullets you shoot at the But I hid out in the hall until the hurricane blew My hair started growing, my face became yours
wall When I reappeared and tried to give you something for the My femur was breaking in half
They had you sleeping and eating Threats of castration for crimes you imagine when I miss pain The sensation was scissors and too much to scream
And I didn't believe them your call You came to hating me again and just sang your refrain So instead, I just started to laugh
When they called you With the bite of the teeth of that ring on my finger, I'm --You had a new dream, it was more like a nightmare
A hurricane thundercloud bound to your bedside, your eulogy singer You were just a little kid, and they cut your hair Suddenly every machine stopped at once
I'd happily take all those bullets inside you and put them Then they stuck you in machines, you came so close to And the monitors beeped the last time
When I was checking vitals inside of myself dying Hundreds of thousands of hospital beds
I suggested a smile --"Someone, oh anyone, tell me how to stop this They should have listened, they thought that you were And all of them empty but mine
You didn't talk for a while She's screaming, expiring, and I'm her only witness lying                         +
You were freezing I'm freezing, infected, and rigid in that room inside her Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up With the door closed, shades drawn, the world shrinks
No one's going to come as long as I lay still in bed beside Built the gears in your head, now he greases them up Let's open up those blinds
You said you hated my tone her" And no one paid attention when you just stopped eating But someone has to sweep the floor
It made you feel so alone                                + "Eighty-seven pounds!" and this all bears repeating Pick up her dirty clothes
So you told me There's a bear inside your stomach --Tell me when you think that we became so unhappy That job's not mine
I had to be leaving The cub's been kicking from within Wearing silver rings with nobody clapping Now that everyone's an enemy, my heart sinks
He's loud, though without vocal chords When we moved here together we were so disappointed Let's put away those claws
But something kept me standing We'll put an end to him Sleeping out of tune with our dreams disjointed I don't blame them for their curtains-calls
By that hospital bed We'll make all the right appointments It killed me to see you getting always rejected Because I pulled the rope
I should have quit but instead No one ever has to know But I didn't mind the things you threw, the phones I I want to call them back out for applause
I took care of you And then tomorrow I'll turn 21 deflected
We'll script another show I didn't mind you blaming me for your mistakes Spring and Thompson on the first of May is horrible
You made me sleep all uneven We'll play charades up in the Chelsea I just held you in the door-frame through all of the We hid in catacombs
And I didn't believe them Drink champagne although you shouldn't be earthquakes So now I'm sleeping next to mousetraps
When they told me that there We'll be blind and dumb until we fall asleep But you packed up your clothes in that bag every night In a bed of all our clothes
Was no saving you None of our friends will come And I would try to grab your ankles (what a pitiful sight) While I hope that she won't come home
                   + They dodge our calls But after over a year, I stopped trying to stop you It was easier to lock the doors and kill the phones
Please, curtains in, start us off . . . And they have for quite a while now From stomping out that door Than to show my skin
You swing first, sorry It's not a shock Coming back like you always do Because the hardest thing
I don't know what I said You don't seem to mind and I just can't see how Well no one's going to fix it for us, no one can Is never to repent for someone else
But you're crying now again You say that, "No one's going to listen, and no one It's letting people in
And that only makes it worse We're too old understands"
We're not old, old at all --So there's no open doors and there's no way to get Well you can come inside
Let me do my job Just too old through Unlock the door, take off your shoes
Let me do my job We're not old, old at all There's no other witnesses, just us two But this might take all night
--There's two people living in one small room To explain to you I would have walked out those sliding
Sylvia, get your head out of the oven There's a bear inside your stomach From your two half-families tearing at you doors
Go back to screaming and cursing The cub's been kicking you for weeks Two ways to tell the story (no one worries) But the timing never seemed right
Remind me again how everyone betrayed you And if this isn't all a dream Two silver rings on our fingers in a hurry When your helicopter came and tried to lift me out
Sylvia, get your head out of the covers Well then we'll cut him from beneath Two people talking inside your brain I put its rope around my neck
Let me take your temperature Well we're not scared of making caves Two people believing that I'm the one to blame And after that you didn't bother with the airlift or the rescue
You can throw the thermometer right back at me Or finding food for him to eat Two different voices coming out of your mouth You knew just what to expect
If that's what you want to do, okay? We're terrified of one another While I'm too cold to care and too sick to shout
And terrified of what that means --You had a new dream, it was more like a nightmare That with the door closed, shades drawn
Please, please calm down But we'll make only quick decisions You were just a little kid, and they cut your hair We're dead enough
Steady out, I'm terrified And you'll just keep my in the waiting room Then they stuck you in machines, you came so close to They don't open from outside
Sorry, I want us to ally And all the while I'll know we're fucked dying And someone has to speak with their teeth behind their
But you swing on little knives And not getting unfucked soon They should have listened, they thought that you were tongue
They're only sharp on one side When we get home we're bigger strangers than we've ever lying To never let that right be denied
been before Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up We can't rely on photographs and visitation time
Let me do my job You sit in front of snowy television, suitcase on the floor Built the gears in your head, now he greases them up But I just don't know where to begin
Let me do my job And no one paid attention when you just stopped eating I want to bust down the door
We're too old "Eighty-seven pounds!" and this all bears repeating If you're willing to forgive
Sylvia, get your head out of the oven We're not old, old at all                          I've go the keys, I'm letting people in
Go back to screaming and cursing Just too old
Remind me again how everyone betrayed you +Pull me out Don't be scared to speak
Sylvia, get your head out of the covers Pull me out Don't speak with someone's tooth
Let me take your temperature Can't you stop this all from happening? Don't bargain when you're weak
You can throw the thermometer right back at me Close the doors and keep them out Don't take that sharp abuse
If that's what you want to do, okay? Some patients can't be saved
Dig me out But that burden's not on you
Sylvia, can't you see what you are doing? Oh, dig me out
Can't you see I'm scared to speak Couldn't you have kept all this from happening? Don't ever let anyone tell you you deserve that
And I hate my voice because it only makes you angry Dig me out from under our house                              +
                      + Ω
Sylvia, I only talk when you are sleeping In the middle of the night I was sleeping sitting up
That's when I tell you everything When a doctor came to tell me, ”Enough is enough"
And I imagine that somehow you're going to hear me
I wish that I had known in
That first minute we met
The unpayable debt
That I owed you

Because you'd been abused

By the bone that refused you
And you hired me
To make up for that

And walking in that room

When you had tubes in your arms
Those singing morphine alarms
Out of tune

They had you sleeping and eating

And I didn't believe them
When they called you
A hurricane thundercloud

When I was checking vitals

I suggested a smile
You didn't talk for a while
You were freezing

You said you hated my tone

It made you feel so alone
So you told me
I had to be leaving
But something kept me standing
By that hospital bed
I should have quit but instead
I took care of you

You made me sleep all uneven

And I didn't believe them
When they told me that there
Was no saving you

                   ++++++++++++++++

Please, curtains in, start us off . . .

You swing first, sorry
I don't know what I said
But you're crying now again
And that only makes it worse

Let me do my job
Let me do my job

Sylvia, get your head out of the oven

Go back to screaming and cursing
Remind me again how everyone betrayed you
Sylvia, get your head out of the covers
Let me take your temperature
You can throw the thermometer right back at me
If that's what you want to do, okay?
Please, please calm down
Steady out, I'm terrified
Sorry, I want us to ally
But you swing on little knives
They're only sharp on one side

Let me do my job
Let me do my job

Sylvia, get your head out of the oven

Go back to screaming and cursing
Remind me again how everyone betrayed you
Sylvia, get your head out of the covers
Let me take your temperature
You can throw the thermometer right back at me
If that's what you want to do, okay?

Sylvia, can't you see what you are doing?

Can't you see I'm scared to speak
And I hate my voice because it only makes you angry

Sylvia, I only talk when you are + sleeping

That's when I tell you everything Y
And I imagine that somehow o you're going to hear me
u
In the middle of the night I was ' sleeping sitting up
When a doctor came to tell me, v ”Enough is enough"
e
--He brought me out into the hall b (I could have sworn it was
haunted) e
And told me something that I e didn't know that I wanted to hear:
n
li
v
i
n
That there was nothing that I could do to save you
The choir's going to sing, and this thing is going to kill you
Something in my throat made my next words shake
And something in the wires made the lightbulbs break
There was glass inside my feet and raining down from the ceiling
It opened up the scars that had just finished healing
It tore apart the canyon running down your femur
(I thought that it was beautiful, it made me a believer)
And as it opened I could hear you howling from your room
But I hid out in the hall until the hurricane blew
When I reappeared and tried to give you something for the pain
You came to hating me again and just sang your refrain
--You had a new dream, it was more like a nightmare
You were just a little kid, and they cut your hair
Then they stuck you in machines, you came so close to dying
They should have listened, they thought that you were lying
Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up
Built the gears in your head, now he greases them up
And no one paid attention when you just stopped eating
"Eighty-seven pounds!" and this all bears repeating
--Tell me when you think that we became so unhappy
Wearing silver rings with nobody clapping
When we moved here together we were so disappointed
Sleeping out of tune with our dreams disjointed
It killed me to see you getting always rejected
But I didn't mind the things you threw, the phones I deflected
I didn't mind you blaming me for your mistakes
I just held you in the door-frame through all of the earthquakes
But you packed up your clothes in that bag every night
And I would try to grab your ankles (what a pitiful sight)
But after over a year, I stopped trying to stop you
From stomping out that door
Coming back like you always do
Well no one's going to fix it for us, no one can
You say that, "No one's going to listen, and no one understands"
--So there's no open doors and there's no way to get through
There's no other witnesses, just us two
--There's two people living in one small room
From your two half-families tearing at you
Two ways to tell the story (no one worries)
Two silver rings on our fingers in a hurry
Two people talking inside your brain
Two people believing that I'm the one to blame
Two different voices coming out of your mouth
While I'm too cold to care and too sick to shout
--You had a new dream, it was more like a nightmare
You were just a little kid, and they cut your hair
Then they stuck you in machines, you came so close to dying
They should have listened, they thought that you were lying
Daddy was an asshole, he fucked you up
Built the gears in your head, now he greases them up
And no one paid attention when you just stopped eating
"Eighty-seven pounds!" and this all bears repeating

Suddenly every machine stopped at once

And the monitors beeped the last time
Hundreds of thousands of hospital beds
And all of them empty but mine

Well, I was lying down with my feet in the air

Completely unable to move
The bed was misshaped, and awkward and tall
And clearly intended for you

You checked yourself out when you put me to bed

And tore that old band off your wrist
But you came back to see me for a minute or less
And left me your ring in my fist
My hair started growing, my face became yours
My femur was breaking in half
The sensation was scissors and too much to scream
So instead, I just started to laugh

Suddenly every machine stopped at once

And the monitors beeped the last time
Hundreds of thousands of hospital beds
And all of them empty but mine
                        +
With the door closed, shades drawn, the world shrinks
Let's open up those blinds
But someone has to sweep the floor
Pick up her dirty clothes
That job's not mine
Now that everyone's an enemy, my heart sinks
Let's put away those claws
I don't blame them for their curtains-calls
Because I pulled the rope
I want to call them back out for applause

Spring and Thompson on the first of May is horrible

We hid in catacombs
So now I'm sleeping next to mousetraps
In a bed of all our clothes
While I hope that she won't come home
It was easier to lock the doors and kill the phones
Than to show my skin
Because the hardest thing
Is never to repent for someone else
It's letting people in

Well you can come inside

Unlock the door, take off your shoes
But this might take all night
To explain to you I would have walked out those sliding doors
But the timing never seemed right
When your helicopter came and tried to lift me out
I put its rope around my neck
And after that you didn't bother with the airlift or the rescue
You knew just what to expect

That with the door closed, shades drawn

We're dead enough
They don't open from outside
And someone has to speak with their teeth behind their tongue
To never let that right be denied
We can't rely on photographs and visitation time
But I just don't know where to begin
I want to bust down the door
If you're willing to forgive
I've go the keys, I'm letting people in
Don't be scared to speak
Don't speak with someone's tooth
Don't bargain when you're weak
Don't take that sharp abuse
Some patients can't be saved
But that burden's not on you

Don't ever let anyone tell you you deserve that

In a nightmare, I am falling from the ceiling into bed beside you

You're asleep, I'm screaming, shoving you to try to wake you up
And like before, you've got no interest in the life you live when you're
awake
Your dreams still follow storylines, like fictions you would make

So I lie down against your back, until we're both back in the hospital
But now it's not a cancer ward, we're sleeping in the morgue
Men and women in blue and white, they are singing all around you
With heavy shovels holding earth, you're being buried to you neck
In that hospital bed, being buried quite alive now
I'm trying to dig you out but all you want is to be buried there together

You're screaming
And cursing
And angry
And hurting me
And then smiling
And crying
Apologizing

I've woken up, I'm in our bed, but there's no breathing body there
beside me
Someone must have taken you while I was stuck asleep
But I know better as my eyes adjust
You've been gone for quite a while now, and I don't work there in the
hospital
(They had to let me go)

When I try to move my arms sometimes, they weigh too much to lift
I think you buried me awake (my one and only parting gift)
But you return to me at night just when I think I may have fallen asleep
Your face is up against mine, and I'm too terrified to speak

You're screaming
And cursing
And angry
And hurting me
And then smiling
And crying
Apologizing