1. |
Ornamental Doll
09:33
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Here in the garden where the birds sing soothing songs
A tap-a-tap of rainfall drums on windows in morse code
Each drop is harsh and salty upon the lips
Split by violent words, ravines traced by gentle touch
Oh, such delicate soul, a dandelion in the breeze
Reach the end of a dark path then pirouette one eighty degrees
Each bump and scrape addressed with a scorched iodine kiss
I don’t want to die, I only want to cease to exist
Here in the field, in the battle
Where the others scream and shout
I am quiet, I am voiceless
And I am slowly catching fire
A silent blaze
Rosemary for remembrance
Pansies for thoughts
Violets withered and pressed into a book of odds and sorts
An ornamental doll
Atop the pyre
Surveys the scene in fear of the likelihood of fire
For it’s never enough to reflect the beauty of the world
To speak softly with a pen that trembles upon the page
And it’s never enough to be taciturn and thoughtful
For every sideways glance prompts me to take the plunge
Find me face down in a stream of consciousness that drowns
Reeds and thickets to drag me to a cold, uncertain bed
It’ll douse the flames
Douse the silent blaze
I’m never enough
I can never be enough
Conscientious objector
Conscript to a reality I never agreed to be a part of
The sketch book is a manifesto
Of an imprisoned mind
Scraps of thoughts unvocalised
And left to hang in time
Revel in the unconscious
Perchance to dream at night
To fall upon the canvas
And stare up at the lights
I’m not angry I’m frustrated
I’m not mad I’m just me
Drag me from the river, drag me to the waiting pyre
Scold me for my demeanour
Chastise me for my ilk
But I’m just a person, I’m just me
I’m just me
Ornamental doll
Atop the pyre
Closes it’s eyes
And dreams of birdsong
Ornamental doll
Amongst the fire
Eyes firmly closed
Drenched in birdsong
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2. |
Yearn to Burn Bright
07:26
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Ignite the world
Let it burn for the sake of burning
Let me lay skinless in a salt lined grave
Of my own making
Look into the night
I can block out the light of the largest star
With just my finger
So here I lay with a fractured sense of self
When it’s the eyes that are shattered
How many years bad luck is that?
Here in the mire, in the sewer
Where the rats suckle low hung fruit and grow fat
I am free to dream what I could have been
<>
And what I wish to present that I am
Though cockroaches peer through my eyes like portholes
I can shake the disease from my bones
Pick off every flea and bat away the cloud of flies
While I still inhale
While I still exhale
I can be saved
Believe I will be saved
And some who would help
Dress as Portia, but speak Iago’s lines
Wrong stage, my love
Now be a dear and fuck off
I have no use for tourists at this time
I’m not a pet for you to keep so you can watch it die
While I still inhale
While I still exhale
I can be saved
I will be saved
Here in the darkness, in a room with no doors
Inside my head, four oppressive walls
Where I am a child again, where I was a child before
With a finger of chalk, let us draw a window
With a blunted pencil, let us write a note
Place a message in a bottle and cast it out
A man asks for help for the child inside is crying out
I’m just a man in search of a leg up
Lift me above this deafening sound of flies
Lift me above the tendrils of the mire
I’ll sithee on the way back down
I’ll sithee as you burn on re-entry
I’ll sithee in ground as we are redistributed
I’ll learn to burn bright
Even if it’s my own cremation
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3. |
Bamber Bridge
10:04
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The ink wells have dried
Amidst a drought of words
Rusted swords jolt in scabbards
As pen punctures parchment skin
Heartfelt sentiments dehumanised
By Times New Roman calligraphy
Before text upon a screen becomes etched into stone
Let discourse rise from lungs
Still able to breathe
Before a plaque is adjoined to a marble monument
Seek souls in shimmering eyes
Still able to weep
Infected with hate
Let the pathogen die
Without a host
The pathogen dies
Leave your sad slogans at the door
If you wish to enter our establishment
You’re then welcome to dance into the night
The only rhythm that you need is that of your beating heart
I will stand in the streets
Form a human barrier
Feet glued to pavement
Landlocked deep sea diver
Creature of your environment, you were not born this way
No new born babe has this capacity for hate
Heal, you must heal
The last bridge is ablaze and river below runs cold
Will it take death to see that we are all one
May we embrace our brothers and sisters before the fall
As the flames of hatred spit lost into the night
If this bridge falls, the fall will kill us all
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