1. |
Vic Spring
03:38
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2. |
Empress
02:41
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In the waning days of the restaurant,
you could catch me at the end of the bar.
First cut,
discount drunk,
with my back to the
writing on the wall.
Just like on that night
with the lunar eclipse-
we couldn’t summon
one sorry soul to serve,
so we wandered out front
to that gravel lot
and howled
for all we were worth.
Chalk it up to a change in weather?
We both knew better.
The way word traveled
about last call
who couldn’t help but overhear?
A shame about the way
that summer went under
because the landlord’s
too dumb to cut a deal!
We boarded the windows and
bleached out the stalls-
who’d have thought this reign
would end in a crawl?
Contractors out back
wait to strip it all down,
they’re just happy to still have a job.
‘if you hear of anything
will you let me know whether?’
but we both knew better.
You could go your whole life,
never find a spot like that again.
Now you’re losing sleep
over some condemned derelict.
But never them,
that took the rent,
it’s only us with one less
jewel in the crown.
Left to scrounge,
I ain’t too proud
for another night
with the Monday crowd.
Take me back I wanna go right now!
Where it’s always gonna even out,
passing the same hundred bucks around.
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3. |
Gone Away
03:21
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Every picture of that day in Olympia.
Held me in your arms,
first time I told anyone.
You grabbed the raw edge
of that old sundress,
and saw me through it in the light.
All evidence lost
to a busted hard drive?
Don’t tell me that it’s all gone away.
When I think of how I was
when I first came out.
Of course you were right
when you brought those
heavy boundaries down.
I know it showed love,
and I know it showed care,
and I know it wasn’t easy,
but I counted up the three
and I made it about me.
Even now i’m still surprised
we even talk at all
after I called:
‘Don’t tell me that it’s all gone away,’
You grabbed the raw edge,
of that old sundress,
and saw me through it in the light,
now you’re back from a
transatlantic flight.
Are you surprised as me to be
here in this place?
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4. |
Close To One
03:16
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Hold my wrists
just like this.
Take your time,
just above
where the nerves and joints
Intertwine.
Baby we can take all night-
beautiful to burn the hours.
Baby always rigs me right
Overhead, high,
life lines, candle lit.
Suspended
overhead, where I
used to watch myself
counting down to the end.
Baby we can take all night-
Finely tied inside my body.
Baby always rigs me right.
It’s what I like,
leash me love
call me crawling.
Close to one
then overcome,
to command it
full attention.
Pull me in
put me back
my place call it
on the rack.
No burning on a lonely night,
finely tied inside my body.
Baby always rigs me right.
It’s what I like,
leash me love
call me crawling.
Close to one
then overcome,
to command it
full attention.
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5. |
Eyes Closed
03:11
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Clutching sheets in vivid sleep,
I can see the thread
through everything
to you.
The day I caught your eye,
my misplaced hand
and you beside me.
I’m bright red watching you
reeling from the blow.
How could I then let you know?
Instead I made you part of me
for so long.
Wednesday night in a mall parkade,
held my breath to stop from swaying.
Our summer of fresh pavement.
Found your flask
while I was packing up one day.
My stomach twisted up with craving,
smelling that last pull.
You were driving
with your eyes closed.
Didn’t I do my part,
tell you which way to go?
Kills me now to think of it,
every plan I’d drop to take.
Kills me now the life I gave.
He didn’t believe in saving lives,
in quick red lights
or stop signs.
How could I never let you know
that I made you part of me
for so long?
Nights too few to justify,
but still too many to name,
for how long ago.
Songs too many to play
and I can’t hear them
without you.
A sober second look says
this is an expulsion.
Of all the songs you’ll never hear
this will be the last one.
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6. |
Two Houses
04:09
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On our moving day
did you feel a little sick,
as if the whole place
tossed us around
while we were sleeping?
We were this close
to living comfortable,
resting easy.
A knock on the door
from our visiting landlord,
up for sale the very next week.
Washed the walls,
took all we could carry.
Watched the old place
sit the winter, empty.
been a minute since we checked in,
I heard you’re still living with your ex?
Working ten hour days,
trying to stay out of each other’s way
while you save your deposit.
You lived so long
with your heels hanging off the edge,
your fractured nest
for now to stay there
for as long as you can,
or as long as you can stand.
Soon you’ll find a room
closer to your other job.
Maybe save for school
or try to pay it down.
Or you could join the club
with your very own character home,
subjugating others
for your own comfort and control.
Two houses,
assets bought and sold
between west end developers
over the telephone.
Rumours rack the neighbourhood,
brace for what comes next
the summer comes
the permits clear
the right hand shakes the left.
Rented houses,
spacious corner lots
worth a fucking fraction of
the stolen land they’re on.
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7. |
Joshua
05:53
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Showed up a week early to your funeral.
Came with sixty spring rolls.
After the shock wore off
and the tears dried up, I asked
would it be so bad
to imagine your laugh?
I wonder what’s gonna happen
to your cameras,
or those new songs with Hannah?
Those old passive conversations
won’t reveal,
so I’m stuck out in the present
searching for you still.
It comes from love,
best I can now,
far beyond all transaction,
there’s nothing else to do
but hold who’s left.
Went to see your pictures at the gallery
where the prints all sold out.
I wasn’t there in time
to claim that prize.
To know no one will
ever let you go again
feels right.
It comes from love,
all I have now,
far beyond all transaction.
Comes from love,
all I have now,
resides with all you gave to me,
well there’s nothing else to do
but hold who’s left.
So hold who’s left.
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8. |
Golden Envelope
03:46
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I don’t remember every conversation-
only hours made.
Even though we slip
from days to weeks now
before we have a chance to speak,
I’m called to celebrate you.
Called to celebrate you, my friend.
All to celebrate you
while you’re still here with me.
Still got that ittle golden envelope
that held the note and house key.
The week that I moved out
I hit your bumper;
The way is rarely straight
and never clean,
when I’m called to celebrate you.
Called to celebrate you, my friend.
All to celebrate you
while you’re still here with me.
I wish you many free and painless hours
to make what makes you happy.
I see the life you’ve built
is wide and deep and reflects
all that you believe in.
What you sent me with,
I won’t forget.
For any cause you name,
I will show up.
I can share what I learned
with everyone,
and anyone who knows you
will agree
is called to celebrate you.
Called to celebrate you, my friend.
All to celebrate you
while you’re still here with me.
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9. |
Kinistino Ave.
03:42
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The last time we crossed paths,
biking past at summer speed…
Now I’m riding
the length of church st.
no hands on the bar and
it starts,
that feeling familiar,
heartstrings pulling
tighter all the time.
I tried to will you back
and crashed out,
cradled in an asphalt crack.
Then I read who’s
set to leave next,
and in my head
Simone’s voice chimed,
‘if every prairie bloom
had gotten room to thrive,
what colours would surround?’
For now, that feeling familiar-
heartstrings severed
when they’re
pulled up from the root.
Is it true?
If we rebuilt this city right,
would it be
the kind that gets
you back to stay?
Hey but, be sure,
my love remains.
No no no.
I want you to go.
for sure, try it out!
I want you to go,
I hope you
make it home.
You know
that feeling familiar,
heartstrings passing
through a sleepy little burg?
I could search,
missing every vivid shade,
looking for
the kind that gets
you back to stay.
Hey but, be sure,
my love remains.
Make it home.
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10. |
See You Around
03:36
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and if you have some time
in the afternoon
you should think of me,
and know I’ll do the same.
Imagine we could
grab a bottle or two,
talk all through the night,
watch the curtain rise
on another morning.
I should like to see you soon.
Would you please just let me know?
I could really stand to be
dancing with you
in a couple of days or so.
Can you feel it hanging in the air?
I sense the party’s at an end.
I’m headed home in an hour or so,
maybe I’m good to stay?
Whatever works for you baby
I could go either way.
This evening’s been enchanting
here we are in barely standing-
it’s been a pleasure.
I should like to see you soon.
Would you please just let me know?
I could really stand to be
dancing with you
in a couple of days or so.
This evening’s been enchanting
here we are in barely standing-
it’s been a pleasure.
Go ahead, take me up on it,
in your heart I hope you feel the same
but people get distracted babe
it happens all the time.
Just promise you’ll remember
everything we've said tonight.
I should like to see you soon.
Would you please just let me know?
I could really stand to be
dancing with you
in a couple of days or so.
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Cassia Hardy Edmonton, Alberta
Cassia Hardy is a loudish musician and songwriter from amiskwaciy, Treaty 6. Her music is urgent and tender, taking stock of exquisite things lost and found.
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