| Sophie, March 1996 New York City |
I took Sophie to the pediatrician this morning and spent two blessed hours with her. I say blessed because the pediatrician took care of us. She asked many questions, examined Sophie thoroughly and listened to me tell her what's been going down for the last couple of months. She assured me that we would work slowly and methodically together to rule out infection and virus being the source of some of this distress. We know for sure that there's no infection because all blood work, including cultures, came back negative, except for a slightly elevated white blood cell count. She agreed that the way The Neurologist treated me wasn't right and attributed the behavior as fear-based. She drew a parallel with how some of her patients are treated in the larger community when they choose to delay or forego vaccinations -- as being immoral or stupid or anti-Science. The Pediatrician understands these patients and their fears, is intellectually curious and has pledged to do no harm. She knows that I've been doing this thing for decades and know my daughter best. She made the point that pediatricians can be excellent diagnosticians because they are used to working from non-verbal cues. I watched her examining Sophie and realized that Sophie hasn't been truly "examined" with someone's literal hands, other than the osteopath's, for -- well -- I can't remember. She is going to run a few viral tests and will get back to me later in the week. She suspects that Sophie might have had some kind of virus or might still have some kind of virus. She agreed that the medication interaction (CBD and Onfi) is worth further exploring and trusts that Dr. Bonni will continue to help me with this.
She supported my decision to take Sophie to a new neurologist -- someone whom I've known for nearly twenty years and who is now in private practice. I'm taking Sophie to see him next week and hope that he'll support us, too. In the meantime, this incredible weight on my shoulders has been lifted by her care, and I have hope that we'll get to the bottom of Sophie's decline. At the very least, I don't feel so terribly alone.