the sword

by Kaho Matsui & i.v.

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    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Ultimate Devotion Plus, hands off the wheel, probablie true, end of psychosis, is it now? is it me?, memory activation twenty twenty five [prod. bappy], PRICK/EVERNESS, Life Lover, and 59 more. , and , .

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1.
every single little lie kept it close to me like a talisman have some hope for me i don't want to be embarassed again how's the little weight kept inside your pocket? how's the luck holding up? and how's my road to giving up? in every single little life i'll live to tell you why you haven't made mistakes that ruin your lifetime like me making space under the bedframe to hide a sword, a shield, a shoebox full of photos i hate taking time to inspect the scarring on my ankles from the weights does it get better from here? it's just as bright but not any easier do you still have the good luck charm i gave you?
2.
sophia 03:05
"my priorities come first" i don't understand a word you're saying you wanna make the news for "drunkest girl ever" or something can't hold a conversation checking your phone.... you turned your room inside out right before you're moving and told me to take all your things blacking out one last time right before your flight it just feels so right i'll do it too i don't plan on waiting it's all a game to you
3.
synchro 02:56
weren't you the one that told me "it's uphill from here" off-season synchronized swimmer i scrape my knees on the concrete chlorinated clean, i'm sick from the fumes when i'm bleaching your hair when something's wrong i guess i bleached mine too back then it's still left in my hair to this day trips to your house always took an hour i did it every day i know the detours it takes i've done it a hundred times by now haven't worn a swimsuit since the last time i drowned i'll stay inside while you sneak in i missed every cue i had the chance to take
4.
moping 01:53
take another "hey what's your number?" i closed the door so fucked up.... i got scared when's the moping gonna end? when's the moping gonna end for me? when's the moping gonna end? when's the moping gonna end for me? drink til i'm yelling yell til my voice is gone gone til i can't come back back into moping again
5.
champion 03:49
(are you bored of me yet? i can't keep your attention i'm no fun, stop pretending take me home) broke down you wouldn't start the car, would you? not surprised you dont wanna get me home, it's dark lonely is the room in your heart roomy is the time that you have i'm the one who called, said "i'm bored of myself" i cried and cried again every time it crossed my mind you begged me to keep it together for once some things just don't work out, please understand me i'm not an easy weight to pull, you're not a champion
6.
the sword 04:07
turn it around for me i don't want to try any longer tell me i'm the one who has to bear bleeding once a lifetime, i'm not scared i just don't think it's me doubt is the sword i pull from the stone hide it under my pillow so you don't think i'm cruel making amends or just leaving a mess on your table we both have something to hide now if you say you're so strong, could you show me? and if you say you're so hurt, could you tell me? you wouldn't budge i wouldn't cry you wouldn't feel anything about it doubt is the sword i pull from the stone carried on my back to protect you i was just just grasping cause i don't wanna lose it all for nothing
7.
run the course by myself while the sun's still out you're not asking questions i can answer you said i look like i'm gonna have a nervous breakdown stand in the shade i can't buuild myself this routine what do you want from me? what do you want from me? what do you want from me? what do you want from me?
8.
statuette 03:02
you wasted a hobby to look at someone else in the mirror i kept on waiting sitting in the corner of your bed in a shroud do you wanna get out? do you wanna get eaten alive like those girlfriends? you wait for a message wait for someone who's not so bored of your antics you kept on wading in the tub where you drowned the figurine obligations torn apart i made sure that you don't owe me again and again, the ignition fails promise me you'll do better or at least give it a try next year, same time different place, no face to make give it back, it's not for you anymore give it back, it's not for you anymore give it back, it's not for you anymore give it back, it's not for you anymore
9.
exit song 02:59
i don't need a latchkey the door's always open i don't need anyone asking me where i've been be just like you, wake up when i want and don't come home for a week or two leave the light on for any of the guests if i ever get lonely and start to overthink be my guest if you wanna know why i can't get myself to therapy don't wash the stain out cause i need to know not to make the same mistake again i don't have to talk any longer but i just keep on talking i don't have to find ways to cope exhausted them all before find me a better day that's coming up find me a better way to see it if's enough i need to find me a better way to get out of this rut i need to find an exit i need to find an exit i need to find an exit i need to find an exit
10.
(tell me something else, tell me something else) day drinking all the time to look for time to kill thought i liked you back then when i was dizzy find something to do about myself when i'm and hungry and bruising and tired breaking out in hives again i got these allergies no it doesn't really hurt to the touch and it doesn't really matter if it's there or not like sunburns on my back and neck and shoulders cause i didn't come back home til the sun set you won't find me anymore i deleted every text i sent no hindsight or backtracks or "back when we did that one thing" (tell me something else, tell me something else)
11.

credits

released August 30, 2024

all music written, performed, recorded, and produced by Kaho Matsui and i.v

cover art and CD design by Joe Fashion

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