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about
I wrote "funeral" at the end of my Grammy's life, and finished it after my Poppy, her husband, died a few months later. I spent most of my weekends at my grandparents, running around with my cousins, swimming, climbing on the roof, playing rummy.
My grandparents took care of me, not in a lovie dovey way, but in the way that they knew how. Their house holds a lot of intense, sad memories, and also very sweet, silly, good memories. It was loud and unyielding, and a magical, insane world for a kid to enter every weekend.
My Grammy was hospitalized during lockdown and her rapid decline was almost surely because of the isolation. We had her memorial at my mom's. We planned everything perfectly, and then it poured rain, which was also perfect for how wild she was. My poppy shared poems he'd written to my grammy. I have no idea whether he'd been writing his whole life. He was so quiet, often in his basement workshop. He hadn't lived without her since they were teenagers, over 60 years.
I reference hunger in a number of my songs— there's a lineage of body dysmorphia in my mom's family that can be traced back to my Grammy, and I'm sure well beyond. For the first time in my life, I feel capable of living with the ebb and flow of how I see and interact with my body. I'm grateful for this bag of bones @
I had trouble imagining what this song would become. I wrote the chorus years before the rest of the song. I wasn't sure what it was about, or whether liked it. Mark heard it and said some very nice things that kept the song floating around. Thank you to Marky, Al, Dash, and Andy for working with me to bring "funeral" to life (hehe). It's special to bring a song to a group of people and have them cradle it like a bebe and rear it as their own.
lyrics
well of course it rained at the funeral
what was ai expecting to find
wandering that tourist trap
with the cowboy that night
i've always been so hungry
I cant shake this feeling I have
i'm not good or bad
i'm just trying to get mine
I can't shake this feeling I have
i'm just like you
i'm gonna die
well of course I was sick for the funeral
what was I expecting to find
deep sea diving in the warden pool that night
you were always so hungry
I cant shake this feeling I have
i'm not good or bad
i'm just trying to get mine
I can't shake this feeling I have
i'm just like you
i'm gonna die
credits
released October 29, 2025
engineered by:
Andy Stack at Stadium Heights +Doom Homestead
Mark Watter at Headroom Philadelphia
mixed by Dash Flach
mastered by Heather Jones
written by Lizzy de Lise
vocals + guitars by Lizzy de Lise
bass + synth bass by Mark Watter
drums by Al Resh
synths + keys by Dash Flach
album art by Camilla Martineli
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