Bud Abbott credited as playing...
Chick Young
- Chick Young: What's the matter?
- Larry Talbot: I know you'll think I'm crazy, but... in a half-an-hour the moon will rise and I'll turn into a wolf.
- Wilbur Grey: You and 20 million other guys!
- [last lines]
- Wilbur Grey: And another thing Mr. Chick Young! The next time I tell you that I saw something when I saw it, you believe me that I saw it!
- Chick Young: Oh relax. Now that we've seen the last of Dracula, the Wolf Man, and the Monster, there's nobody to frighten us anymore.
- Invisible Man: Oh, that's too bad. I was hoping to get in on the excitement.
- Chick Young: Who said that?
- Invisible Man: Allow me to introduce myself. I'm the Invisible Man.
- Chick Young: You're making enough noise to wake up the dead!
- Wilbur Grey: I don't have to wake him up. He's up.
- Chick Young: I know there's no such person as Dracula. You know there's no such person as Dracula.
- Wilbur Grey: But does Dracula know it?
- Chick Young: You still want your exhibits?
- McDougal: Of course I do.
- Wilbur Grey: Here comes one of 'em now!
- Chick Young: What I'd like to know is, what does he got they I haven't got?
- Dr. Sandra Mornay: A brain.
- Wilbur: [flattered] Oh, a brain.
- Chick Young: I'd like to know where it is.
- Chick Young: Get up on your feet. It's only a dummy
- Wilbur Grey: Dummy nothin'. It was smart enough to scare me.
- Wilbur Grey: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
- Wilbur Grey: Who screamed?
- Chick Young: You did.
- Chick Young: [amused] I did?
- Joan Raymond: Oh Wilbur, can't we both come along too?
- Wilbur Grey: Yes, mon amour.
- Wilbur Grey: That's Spanish.
- Chick Young: That's French.
- Wilbur Grey: How do you like that, I speak French too.
- Chick Young: Please give me a little ether.
- Dr. Sandra Mornay: We don't need it. You won't feel a thing.
- Wilbur Grey: You got the best looking one.
- Chick Young: So what?
- Wilbur Grey: Yours had teeth.
- Chick Young: Look, Wilbur, yours had teeth too.
- Wilbur Grey: Did you see that tooth?
- Chick Young: Yes I happened to see it.
- Wilbur Grey: Mine had so much bridge work, every time I kissed her I had to pay toll.
- Wilbur Grey: Look, now you've got two dates. What about Sandra, you bigamist?
- Chick Young: Sandra? I don't know. Joan is awful cute.
- Wilbur Grey: All right. You take Joan and I'll take Sandra.
- Chick Young: Oh, Sandra sends me.
- Wilbur Grey: Well then I'll take Joan.
- Chick Young: Joan sends me too.
- Wilbur Grey: Now listen, you sawed-off Romeo. In a minute, I'll send you!
- Chick Young: You don't even appeal to me.
- Wilbur Grey: Look, Wilbur, we've always been pals, haven't we?
- Chick Young: Oh, yes.
- Wilbur Grey: We've always shared and shared alike, haven't we?
- Chick Young: Mm-hmm.
- Wilbur Grey: Well, now look. Let's be reasonable. Come on.
- Chick Young: I've always shared with you.
- Wilbur Grey: That you have!
- Chick Young: If I had two cigarettes, I'd give you one.
- Wilbur Grey: That's right.
- Chick Young: And if I had two pairs of shoes, I'd give you a pair.
- Wilbur Grey: Don't I know that?
- Chick Young: And if I have two girls...
- Wilbur Grey: [Interrupting and stuttering] Well?
- Chick Young: Why don't you light that cigarette, put on those shoes and take a walk for yourself?
- Wilbur Grey: That's just what I'm gonna do, but with you.
- Chick Young: I'm going out to get the other crate. And no back talk!
- Wilbur Grey: I've got just two words to say to you.
- Chick Young: What is that?
- Wilbur Grey: Hurry back.
- Larry Talbot: So! We meet again, Count Dracula.
- Dracula: Dracula?
- Wilbur Grey: Yes. That's who he says you are.
- Dracula: Oh. My costume perhaps?
- Chick Young: [jokingly] No. Talbot here thinks you're the real thing.
- Wilbur Grey: Uh-huh. Right out of McDougal's House of Horrors.
- Dracula: What an odd hallucination. But, the human mind is often inflamed with strange complexes. I suggest you consult your physician, Mr. Talbot.
- Chick Young: [referring to Wilbur] And take him along with you, please.
- Chick Young: Professor, do you understand women?
- Prof. Stevens: I don't even try. I'm gonna get me a drink.
- Chick Young: Now listen, Talbot. Enough is enough. Now Wilbur's scared to death. Hello? Hello? He's gone.
- Wilbur: So am I.
- Chick Young: No you don't come here. I'm gonna settle this thing once and for all. We'll search this place.
- Wilbur: Look Chick, it's a little past sunset and if Dracula is here he's gonna be wanting breakfast, and I'm fatter than you, and it ain't gonna be me.
- Chick Young: [reading exhibit card] "Frankenstein gave the Monster eternal life by shooting it full of electricity. Some people claim it is not dead even now, just dormant."
- [laughs to Wilbur]
- Chick Young: Now, who would be silly enough to believe that?
- [laughs more]
- Wilbur Grey: [joins in laughter] Who WOULD be silly enough to believe that?
- [more laughter as he beckons Chick closer, then says, worried]
- Wilbur Grey: ... Me!
- Wilbur Grey: You know that person you said there's no such person? I think he's in there... in person. I was reading this sign over here, Dracula's Legend. All of a sudden I heard...
- [Wilbur imitates a creaking noise]
- Chick Young: That's the wind.
- Wilbur Grey: It should get oiled.