Bud Abbott credited as playing...
Ted Higgins
- Ted Higgins: I'd like to have a tooth pulled. I want no anesthetic and I don't care how much it hurts.
- Dentist's Assistant: Oh my, what a brave man you are! What tooth is it?
- Ted Higgins: [turns to Tommy] Show her the tooth.
- Ted Higgins: I'm always nervous when I handle money.
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: I'm always nervous when I don't handle it.
- Ted Higgins: You take the money. They'd never suspect you.
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: I don't want the money. I'd only spend it on silly things.
- Ted Higgins: Is she in the living room?
- Hilda, the Maid: No. She's indisposed.
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: [starts pushing his way in] We'll see her in there.
- Ted Higgins: What if you had 5 dollars in one pant's pocket and 10 dollars in the other pants pocket. What would you have?
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: Someone else's pants.
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: I like worcester shire sheer shauce.
- Ted Higgins: You like what?
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: Wooster sheer shire sauce.
- Ted Higgins: You like worcestershire sheershire shauce?
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: You can't even say it!
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: Look at that wall over there. Isn't that a beautiful wall? You know what it reminds me of?
- Ted Higgins: What?
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: [points at a different wall] That wall over here.
- Ted Higgins: Oh stop. Walls are walls.
- Ted Higgins: You don't even know what a husband is!
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: A husband is what's left of a sweetheart after the nerve has been killed.
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: 20 thousand laws in this city and we can't find one to break.
- Ted Higgins: Now don't get excited, Tommy. I'll get you out of this mess and get you in jail.
- Ted Higgins: We'll bet on Lolly at 30 to 1.
- Tommy Hinchcliffe: 30 to 1? How can we do that? It's already quarter to!