Gloria Holden credited as playing...
Mrs. Janet Archer
- Mrs. Janet Archer: Well, um, well, it's all very silly, but the fact is that my daughter has written a - a sort of diary.
- Kenneth Marquis: Indeed? Well, I'm confident that it reflects her girlish charms.
- Mrs. Janet Archer: Well, um, this diary is, um ...
- Kenneth Marquis: You are talking, I take it about that volume that your husband is clutching in his clammy hands?
- Mrs. Janet Archer: Well, it's all quite ridiculous, and I'm sure you'll be the first to - Go ahead, Harry. Please read some of it to Mr. Marquis, and then he'll realize how crazy the whole thing is.
- Harry P. Archer: [Reading] "Not all women know really great love. And so few can save the man they love from himself."
- [clears his throat]
- Kenneth Marquis: Doesn't read very fluently, does he?
- Harry P. Archer: "Kenny-boy is so sweet. I'm lucky I found Kenny-boy in time." Kenny-boy is you!
- Kenneth Marquis: Really?
- Harry P. Archer: That's from my daughter's diary.
- Mrs. Janet Archer: Silly, isn't it?
- Kenneth Marquis: No, I like it.
- Harry P. Archer: It's just schoolgirl romantic nonsense! But, there are reasons why we couldn't question Corliss.
- Kenneth Marquis: Naturally, after your contemptible invasion of the privacy of her diary.
- Harry P. Archer: It's none of your business what I do.
- Kenneth Marquis: My name is mentioned.
- Harry P. Archer: I'll burn every page. Only a fool would think there was any truth to this.
- Kenneth Marquis: Every single word of it is true.
- Harry P. Archer: I wondered who rang. Oh, that's nice. Who sent it? Uncle George? Mmm. Good.
- Mildred: Kenneth Marquis!
- Harry P. Archer: Kenneth - Let me see that!
- [Reading tag]
- Harry P. Archer: "May this brighten a youth blighted by parental stupidity and miserlyness. Kenneth Marquis." He did that to annoy me. I'll - I'll throw it out!
- Corliss Archer: Oh, Daddy, you can't!
- Mrs. Janet Archer: What's wrong?
- Harry P. Archer: That - that pinhead, that lowdown, shockworn Casanova Marquis sent Corliss this box of candy!
- Corliss Archer: Daddy says I can't keep it!
- Mrs. Janet Archer: Why Harry, why on earth - Kenneth Marquis? Sending candy to Corliss?
- Corliss Archer: Well, you see Mom -
- Harry P. Archer: Corliss had nothing to do with it. He's trying to irritate me by showing me up as a cheapskate.
- Mrs. Janet Archer: Well, if Miss Corliss had nothing to do with Mr. Marquis, I don't think it would hurt if she ate the candy.
- Corliss Archer: Look, Mom.
- Mrs. Janet Archer: Well, anyway, you can't return it with a piece missing.
- Corliss Archer: Oh, Daddy ate that piece.
- Dexter Franklin: Hi, Mr. Archer.
- Harry P. Archer: Oh ...
- Dexter Franklin: This is tomorrow.
- Harry P. Archer: I'll make a note of that fact on my calender.
- Mrs. Janet Archer: Do you mind, Dexter, we're awfully busy.
- Dexter Franklin: But you promised to talk to me about the blackmail today.
- Harry P. Archer: At this moment there is nothing in the world I'd be willing to talk to you about. Now get out!
- Dexter Franklin: Holy cow!