Mel Blanc credited as playing...
Bugs Bunny • Sheriff of Nottingham • Little John
- Bugs Bunny: Sheriff of Nottingham, in gratitude for your faithful service, I shall knight thee.
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Your most gracious Majesty.
- Bugs Bunny: In the name of my most royal Majesty, I knight thee.
- Bugs Bunny: [Conks the Sheriff on the head with his scepter] Arise, Sir Loin of Beef.
- Bugs Bunny: [Conks him again] Arise, Earl of Cloves.
- Bugs Bunny: [Conk] Arise, Duke of Brittingham.
- Bugs Bunny: [Conk] Arise, Baron of Munchausen.
- Bugs Bunny: [Conk] Arise, Essence of Myrrh...
- Bugs Bunny: [Conk] Milk of Magnesia...
- Bugs Bunny: [Conk] Quarter of ten.
- Sheriff of Nottingham: [extremely dazed] You are too kind, Your Majesty.
- Bugs Bunny: [Disguised Bugs turns his head aside and speaks to audience] Got lots of stamina!
- [last lines]
- Little John: Don't you worry, never fear, Ro...
- Bugs Bunny: Yeah, I know, Robin Hood will soon be here. He robs from the rich and he gives to the poor. Yo-ho-ho, he goes skipping, tra-la-la, through Sherwood Forest, helping the needy and the oppressed. Ah, you've been saying that through the whole picture! Well, where is he?
- Little John: Oh, you should not talk mean like that, because there he is!
- Robin Hood: [in live-action footage] Welcome to Sherwood!
- Bugs Bunny: [Bugs stares in astonishment for a moment] Nah, that's silly. It couldn't be him.
- Sheriff of Nottingham: [Bugs runs into the King's Royal Rose Gardens] Stop! Stop! You can't go in there! You're not allowed in there! This is the King's private garden! You're standing on royal ground!
- Bugs Bunny: Royal ground? You mean to say that this ground is better than that ground over there?
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Yes, it is!
- Bugs Bunny: Oh, I don't know. Now, you take this piece of ground over here. Now here's a nice piece of property. Level, fruit trees, choice view, improvements already in. Eh, what type of house was you planning?
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Well, I... I sort of had a six-room Tudor in mind.
- Bugs Bunny: Then this is the just the place for you, and it's priced just right. But, uh, first, uh... Are you a veteran?
- Sheriff of Nottingham: No, I'm a...
- Bugs Bunny: Good, then it'll be easy. Here, just sign on the dotted line.
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Well, uh... couldn't I call you later? You see, I...
- Bugs Bunny: Well, I don't know. You see, there was a couple here from Kansas City looking at this place this morning, and they...
- Sheriff of Nottingham: All right! I'll sign! I'll sign! Here!
- Bugs Bunny: You'll never regret it, my friend. This place will double in value inside six months.
- [Cut to the Sheriff working on a half-finished house in the Garden when he suddenly realizes what he was deceived]
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Ooh! I hate myself! I do! I do! I do!
- [the Sheriff of Nottingham hits himself in the head with his hammer repeatedly, almost contemplating suicide]
- Little John: Don't you worry, never fear. Robin Hood will soon be here.
- [blows a fanfare on bugle and stands at attention]
- Bugs Bunny: Yeah, Mr. Wise Guy. Now you're gonna get it. Robin Hood'll fix you, brother.
- [after a long pause, Little John looks to the distance, shrugs his shoulders in disbelief and then leaves]
- Bugs Bunny: Eh, where was we?
- Sheriff of Nottingham: O-ho, varlet! Caught crimson-fisted!
- Bugs Bunny: Eh, what's up, doc?
- Sheriff of Nottingham: What's up, forsooth! It's the rack for you, my long-eared knave. These are the King's carrots.
- Sheriff of Nottingham: It's the rack for you, me long-eared fellow. The King shall indeed be proud of me.
- Bugs Bunny: King? Lo, the King approacheth!
- Sheriff of Nottingham: The King? Where? Where?
- Bugs Bunny: There, there, o'er yon flowered bank!
- Sheriff of Nottingham: [the Sheriff of Nottingham bows his head] Your Majesty.
- [after Bugs hit the Sheriff of Nottingham's head with a club numerous times, little kings float around his head]
- Sheriff of Nottingham: Ods fish! The very air abounds in kings.
- Bugs Bunny: [nervously] Heh heh, well I must be toddling along. Spot of tiffin and all that. Give my regards to the King, and the Queen, and the Jack, and the Ten of Diamonds.
- [makes a break for it]
- Sheriff of Nottingham: [grabs Bugs by the neck] Not so fast! We have an appointment with the rack!