Kathleen Harrison credited as playing...
Mrs. Dilber
- Mrs. Dilber: A guinea? For me? What for?
- Ebenezer Scrooge: I'll give you a guess!
- Mrs. Dilber: [pause] To keep me mouth shut?
- Mrs. Dilber: [of Jacob Marley] Is he dead?
- Ebenezer Scrooge: Yes.
- Mrs. Dilber: [to the undertaker] It's just like you said!
- The Undertaker: I always know.
- Mrs. Dilber: [to Bob Cratchit] I've come to say that Mister Marley ain't expected to make it through the night, and that if Mister Scrooge wishes to take his leave of him, he'd best nip along sharply, or there won't be no Mister Marley to take leave of, as we know the use of the word. He's breathing very queer - when he does breathe at all.
- Mrs. Dilber: Are you all right, Mr. Scrooge?
- Ebenezer Scrooge: [ecstatic] I... I don't know. I don't know anything. I never did know anything.
- [Mrs. Dilber and Scrooge starts laughing]
- Ebenezer Scrooge: But now I KNOW that I don't know anything!
- [begins to clap his hands and sing, to the tune of 'Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush']
- Ebenezer Scrooge: I don't know anything! I never did know anything! But now I know that I don't know! All on a Christmas morning!
- [speaking again]
- Ebenezer Scrooge: Shall I stand on my head? I must stand on my head.
- [He does so, and Mrs. Dilber runs out screaming]
- Ebenezer Scrooge: Who is that? The doctor?
- Mrs. Dilber: The undertaker.
- Ebenezer Scrooge: You don't believe in letting the grass grow under your feet, do you?
- The Undertaker: Ours is a very competitive profession, sir.
- Mrs. Dilber: [Scrooge raises her pay from two shillings a week to 16] Do you want to see a doctor?
- Ebenezer Scrooge: A doctor? Certainly not, nor the undertaker!