Curucu, Beast of the Amazon

Any movie that has a scene of the hero smoking while the doctor is giving him his annual medical check up has to be a classic.

There is validity to every single negative review of this picture, but who cares? Look, I love Ingmar Bergman films, but am I going to kick back with beer and nacho cheese Doritos on a summer Saturday afternoon watching "Cries And Whispers?" I didn't spend all morning cutting the grass to then crash the couch and drown myself in Swedish angst. That's for cold bleak winter nights. For summer I want a jungle, a tight pants adventuress and a hero who can spend an entire week lost in the Amazon and still not have a single day's facial hair. Yes, as everyone agrees without a doubt the movie rips you off and leaves you a chump for ever believing such a thing as truth in advertising exists. But stop crybaby'ing about it already. Get over your disappointment like a big boy and just enjoy the mustard we got. To hell with your Grey Poupon!

I spend a lot of time trying to add lesser known 50's sci-fi titles to my ever growing collection. Unfortunately I came to this title. Cool title and stars Beverly Garland made by Universal - how could I miss? Although the poster looks great on this flick, find the strength to resist. The Brazilian locations are great and acting was acceptable but whoever wrote the script was a loser. This played out more like an episode of Scooby Doo(old man Smithers and all). The part that really killed me was that after they ruin the whole movie after 45 minutes, it goes on for another 35 minutes!! Seriously, for lesser known movies, check out Giant from the Unknown or Monster from Green Hell before you ever touch this garbage.

Universal, which brought us massive hits like E.T. and the Jurassic Park movies, were responsible for this.

It is the worst of the Universal monster movies of the 1950's, but I loved it. It is one of the better so-bad-it's-good movies and the thing that surprised me the most was that it was shot in colour, despite the low budget.

The 'monster' has to be seen to be believed. The main female lead in this, Beverly Garland, is used to fighting out of this world monsters as she fought the 'carrot' in It Conquered the World.

See this if you get the chance. It is worth watching just to see the 'monster'.

Rating: 3 stars out of 5.

Good thing the producers went up the Amazon River for location shots, because headline monster Curucu amounts to a big lump of moldy cheese. Then too, for some unknown reason the screenplay tips its hand halfway through, killing what little suspense there is. But we do get a good look at comely Beverly Garland getting menaced by about everything that creeps, crawls, or oozes through the jungle. Plus, she confirms her title as the Queen of Scream with at least three ear blasters. Good thing hunky John Bromfield is on hand to handle the hero stuff. Still, the movie was something of a treat for 1956, that is, before color TV made such travelogues everyday fare. Now the movie is little more than a very obscure curiosity.

(In passing-- Catch the script's sneaky probing of modernity. Tupanico {Payne} wonders whether the Indians really are better off after entering the white man's money economy. Unless I missed something, the probing is surprisingly left unresolved. It's a provocative note in an otherwise sloppy script.)

Curucu, Beast of the Amazon (1956)

** (out of 4)

John Bromfield and Beverly Garland travel up the Amazon to kill the title character, a large parrot like creature. Many older horror fans call this one of the most disappointing monster films of the decade due to a couple twists in the plot. I picked up on those twists pretty early and they were stupid but the real interesting thing is that this really seemed like an early version of the infamous Cannibal Holocaust. The best thing about the film is that it was shot in the Amazon, which means we get all sorts of shots with various animals ranging from pythons to huge spiders. With this comes several animal death scenes that won't make PETA members too happy.