Frank Sinatra credited as playing...
Capt. Tom Reynolds
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: You know, the movies have got it all wrong, a cigarette tastes lousy when you're wounded.
- Capt. Danny De Mortimer: [down with cerebral malaria] I feel like an old serial. When does the train run over me?
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: [tending him] Shut up.
- Cpl. Bill Ringa: Excuse me for saying so, sir... but you look terrible.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: Inside of my mouth tastes like the outside of a crocodile.
- Cpl. Bill Ringa: Well, there's some toothpaste in here, sir. You can use it on your finger for washing your teeth. I've got some water for rinsing out your mouth. But I'd like to caution the captain against drinking that water. It has a tendency to cause ulcers. Now, for swallowing, I suggest the gin, sir.
- Head Nurse: [Sternly] You get back into bed. That's an order. Get back into bed!
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: One of these days, I'm gonna meet a nurse who doesn't sound like a troop commander.
- Head Nurse: Captain, I'm going to report you to the colonel.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: Tattletale.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: I'm not sure I can even spell democracy and I don't know what the big picture even looks like but I know you've got a big mouth.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: He thinks I should pray once in awhile; because, pray never hurt anybody and it don't cost a dime.
- Nautaung: America a very funny place, full of prayers and money.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: [explaining a kiss from a nurse] Just a good old American salutation. You'd be surprised at some of the customs of my people.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: [admiring the Himalayan landscape] Just like Indianapolis, only this goes up and down.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: What would you like for Christmas?
- Carla Vesari: [bored with his provincialism] A twelve-foot statue of your grandfather.
- Capt. Danny De Mortimer: Whiskey! I just liberated it.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: How do you know it's not poisoned?
- Capt. Danny De Mortimer: I don't, that's why I decided to share it with you.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: [while visiting at Regas' posh villa in northern India, noticing the mix of people present] Europeans, Sikhs, Chinese... Doctors, lawyers, merchants and thieves.
- Carla Vesari: [Mockingly] You're a terrible poet.
- Carla Vesari: Captain Reynolds, is this your first war?
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: It is definitely my last.
- Carla Vesari: I think you love it. Like most men, you relish war.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: Miss Vesari, this may come as a shock to you, but I do not like war.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: Danny, do you know anything about this guy, Regas?
- Capt. Danny De Mortimer: Well... He's supposed to be in shipping, but I think he's an opium smuggler in wolf's clothing.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: What about Carla Vesari? She's quite a crock of curry.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: [Meeting with his commanding officer at Army headquarters, Calcutta] I want a doctor, Fred, and I want one right away. Or you won't have a single Kachin left.
- Col. Fred Parkson: Did you fly down here just to bicker about doctors?
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: Among other things. But most important, the doctor. We've only been here a few hours, but I've seen 10, 15 doctors. Where they coming from? Where they going?
- Col. Fred Parkson: I'll listen to anything you gotta' say. But just who do you think you are? You and your jungle wallahs coming here, flexing your muscles. You're not the only guys fighting a backwash war.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: We're the only ones without a doctor.
- Col. Fred Parkson: Find yourself an unassigned doctor, and I'll tag him for your outfit.
- Col. Fred Parkson: Want you and Danny to take a holiday. Pick any rest area in the Himalayas. Take two weeks.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: Holiday? No. Out of the question. I couldn't stay out of the hills for two weeks.
- Col. Fred Parkson: Kachins got by for hundreds of years before you... and they'll get by long after I spit on your grave.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: [while checking in at the hotel, receiving an unexpected invite from Nikko Regas] Well, we're invited to a party tonight. By Mr. Nikko Regas.
- Capt. Danny De Mortimer: [Suspicious about how Regas knew they were there] And how did he know? There's something spooky about that man.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: How can you say that? He's the squarest shooter on the road to Mandalay.
- Capt. Danny De Mortimer: I wish I had a copy of 'Who 's Who in India.' Or 'The Bombay Police Blotter.' I'd like to look up friend Regas.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: Anybody who invites *us* to a party can't be all that bad. And let's not bite the hand that buys the booze.
- Nikko Regas: [Greeting Tom and Danny at his cottage in Chandigarh] Welcome, allies.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: Mr. Regas.
- Capt. Danny De Mortimer: We didn't realize you were tossing a gala.
- Nikko Regas: Oh, nonsense. This sort of thing goes on every night. But I want you to consider this your home in Chandigarh. Your 'foxhole away from your foxhole,' so to speak.
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: You live here with Nikko?
- Carla Vesari: I want to tell you something, Captain, and then perhaps you'll let me alone. I live here with Nikko. So why don't you go back to the hills and play with your popguns?
- Capt. Tom Reynolds: [Upon seeing a Sadhu - a Hindu ascetic holy man - while they are visiting a shrine] Danny lived like that once.
- Capt. Danny De Mortimer: For a while, but I couldn't stand it. So I came back to the world of men and their commodities. I couldn't stand that, either.