Russ Tamblyn credited as playing...
Lt. (j.g.) Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: [he has brought her a rose] It's one of those artificial ones.
- Toni Denham: It's still very nice.
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: I didn't know it was artificial when I stole it from the hotel lobby.
- Lt. Peter Langley: Have you done something I don't know about?
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: I haven't even done anything I don't know about.
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: Who needs 'em. As a matter of fact, Smitty, I've been thinking. There's nothing in Naval regulations that says we have to spend our liberty chasin' girls.
- Lt. Cmdr. Ben Bradville: What have you got in mind?
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: Well, we could - well, we could go see some statues, visit museums, see some cathedrals, soak up a little culture for a change.
- Lt. Cmdr. Ben Bradville: And just forget about girls?
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: Exactly.
- Lt. Cmdr. Ben Bradville: What if we get to one of these museums and see a couple of dames?
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: We ignore 'em.
- Lt. Cmdr. Ben Bradville: What are your plans for shore leave?
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: Well, sir, Lt. Langley and I have decided to spend our time studying Italian architecture.
- Lt. Cmdr. Ben Bradville: That's one of putting it.
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: Mademoiselle, you say?
- Lt. Cmdr. Ben Bradville: That's right, Lieutenant. And I understand the Mademoiselle is quite a dish.
- Toni Denham: I'm still under sedation from that Torpedo.
- [looking at Smitty's watch]
- Toni Denham: Is this thing right?
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: Yep. 9:15.
- Toni Denham: When did you last see Pete?
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: A couple of hours ago. What about Michele?
- Toni Denham: Hmmm. Well, let's see now, I feel asleep, well, let's face it, I passed right out about 7 o'clock. And then I woke up - I came to, about 8 o'clock. And she wasn't there.
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: Bachelors have parties before they get married. I don't see any reason why a girl can't - hey, what would you - what would you call a female bachelor?
- Toni Denham: Toni.
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: Yeah, Toni.
- Toni Denham: [kiss] Tell me I'm out of my mind.
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: You're out of your mind.
- Toni Denham: What?
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: The Navy just doesn't like its personnel to overstay liberty.
- Toni Denham: Well, I guess it's time to put the Genie back. Hmm?
- Toni Denham: This Genie isn't going to fit in here.
- Lt. Wadsworth 'Smitty' Smith: Deflate.
- Toni Denham: How?