Sinbad Against the 7 Saracens

in the version i saw, ali baba and the seven saracens, the actors did not so much "act" as they walked around and shouted lines in the ear of the person standing next to them --- lines such as "swine dog, if i ever see your face again i will kill you. now go away and fetch me my dinner" and "no, really, nothing is wrong. AAAAA!!! AAAA!!! no, its nothing. AAAA!!! AAA!!! AAA!!! i tell you its nothing. AAAA!!!"

however it may not be the fault of the actors, considering the english dubbing is worse than any japanese horror flick.

ali baba falls in love with a girl who saves his life. he soon gets captured (read: gets knocked out by getting hit in the head by a pole) which stalls his chances to overthrow omar, a clint eastwood type who broods a lot, yells a lot, and likes to walk around topless. off the the dungeon goes ali baba.

meanwhile omar discovers that in order to become accepted by the magi and become faja (your guess is as good as mine) he must fight the saracens when "the moon blocks the light of the sun."

before i continue i must mention the orchestration which seems to go by the rule "fill any silence with a horn and a cymbal" and on occasion you can actually hear the dialogue clearly.

okay. while fatima, the girl ali baba loves, is taken to a dungeon over-seen by a shawl-encrusted nymph with a whip, ali baba befriends a midget who is impressed by ali's manliness. the midget, named "jookie", crawls through the air vents (!!!) and comes upon the dungeon where fatima is. he interrupts their conversation about eunichs (!!!) to tell them of an escape plan at midnight and by "midnight" he means "noon" since all the action takes place during the day. then comes the escape which leaves poor jookie tear-ridden.

there is a swordfight. fatima leads ali baba behind a decorative pillar and kisses him. omar emerges and smacks a few people around while flashing his nipples at the camera. wow. this is in the first 45 minutes!

as for rating the film i must say i was entertained quite a bit by the lack of talent all around. the ms3k value is high so watching with a group of people with that in mind might be a good idea.

Costumes, props, sets and locations are nice, so are the horses and a couple of battle scenes are great but that is just about it. No one in the film caught my attention, the story didn't grab me so I was bored with it. The film wasn't even campy or even unintentionally funny enough to poke fun at.

There is a heroic(?) dwarf crawling around in a tunnel this is suppose to give a little comedy relief but I didn't find him funny at all.

I'll speak of the male's costumes again - I loved them. In particular I loved the guys in black with the red hats. The females were is okay looking dresses, only one or two of them I found barely pretty.

Costumes, props and sets are really the only thing I liked about the film.

2/10

For reasons I can't explain the original Italian film has the hero as Sinbad. When it was dubbed in English for infliction on the American and the rest of the English speaking world it was turned into Ali Baba and the Seven Saracens. You'll have to ask the Italians why.

But the hero is neither a guy consorting with thieves nor a braggart sailor. Instead Dan Harrison under either name is a local celebrity who finds a usurper in Gordon Mitchell having taken over the government over Bagdad. Away with him, except that he's got a really curvaceous niece in Bella Cortez. Got to win her over at the same time.

One thing the film did have going for it is a midget actor named Tony Di Mitri who Harrison's sidekick. Turns out his size comes in mighty handy because he's the only guy who can get in and out of some tight places in order to open the gate for the rebel troops. DiMitri provides some comic relief.

But not enough to save the film.

Is it Sinbad? Is it Ali Baba? Does it actually matter? Now the movie tries to take certain elements from other movies and put them together and make something out of it. The love story, the betrayal story, the friends/enemies story ... all seen before, sometimes as single story elements, but all done way better than what you get served here.

Having said that, if you are a Sword and Sandals addict (fan?) you might not even care. But there are so many of them and not all have many merits to watch them. I'd argue this is one of the weaker ones

Like with a number of Italian movies American-International Pictures picked up in the 1960s, "Ali Baba and the Seven Saracens" bypassed North American theaters and was released directly to television. That was a good decision, but I think a better one would have been to have looked for a better movie to pick up. Those viewers expecting a retelling of the Arabian Nights hero (either loose or more accurate) will be disappointed, since the story has absolutely nothing to do with the Ali Baba hero - or Sinbad for that matter. It's instead another sword and sandal story about an evil tyrant and rebels trying to overthrow him. Despite the familiar story, it could have still worked, but the movie for the most part is simply dull and uninvolving. There's almost no real action in the first third of the movie, and while there's a bit more in the remaining portion, it's almost all choreographed and directed with no passion at all. Another problem is that the character of Ali Baba/Sinbad gets put on the back burner for long periods of time. I guess the production values are okay, but I would have sacrificed some of that for some real excitement and action.