Michael Hordern credited as playing...
Senex
- [last lines]
- Pseudolus: [sung] Lovers divided, get coincided - something for everyone...
- Hero, Philia: A comedy tonight!
- Pseudolus: Father and mother, get one another.
- Domina: Something for everyone...
- Senex: [whispers] A tragedy tonight.
- Miles Gloriosus: I get the twins, they get the best!
- Erronius: I get a family...
- Hysterium: I get a rest.
- Soldiers: We get a few girls...
- Lycus: I'll get some new girls.
- Pseudolus: I get the thing I want to be...
- Hero: [spoken] Free.
- Pseudolus: Free!
- Pseudolus, Hero, Philia, Domina, Senex, Miles Gloriosus, Erronius, Hysterium, Soldiers, Lycus: Free, free, free, free - Nothing for kings, nothing for crowns! Something for lovers, liars and clowns - What is the moral? Must be a moral. Here is the moral wrong or right - Morals tomorrow, comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy, comedy - tonight!
- Senex, Pseudolus, Hysterium, Lycus: [singing] Oh, oh, wouldn't she be delightful,
- Lycus: Cleaning up?
- Senex: Leaning down,
- Senex, Pseudolus, Hysterium, Lycus: Everybody ought to have a maid, Someone who'll be, Busy as a bumblebee, And even if you grumble, Be as graceful as a grouse,
- Lycus: Wriggling in the anteroom!
- Hysterium: Jiggling in the living room!
- Pseudolus: Giggling in the dining room!
- Senex: Wiggling in the other rooms!
- Senex, Pseudolus, Hysterium, Lycus: Puttering all around the house!
- Pseudolus: Your new maid. We needed someone to help.
- Senex: The new maid? She seems very loyal.
- Pseudolus: Very courteous and very efficient and very thoughtful.
- Senex: Maids like me. I'm neat. I like maids. They're neat.
- [singing]
- Senex: Everybody ought to have a maid, Everybody ought to have a working girl, Everybody ought to have a lurking girl, To putter around the house, Everybody ought to have a maid, Everybody ought to have a menial, Consistently congenial, And quieter than a mouse, Oh, oh, wouldn't she be delicious, Tidying up the dishes, neat as a pin? Oh, oh, wouldnt she be delightful, Sweeping out? Sleeping in...