Peter O'Toole credited as playing...
Simon Dermott
- Nicole Bonnet: Your arm is much better.
- Simon Dermott: Oh no no, it hurts, it hurts.
- Nicole Bonnet: It's the other arm.
- Simon Dermott: The infection is spreading.
- Simon Dermott: Why must it be this particular work of art?
- Nicole Bonnet: You don't think I'd steal something that didn't belong to me, do you?
- Simon Dermott: Excuse me, I spoke without thinking.
- Nicole Bonnet: I can't drive a stolen car!
- Simon Dermott: Same principle, four gears forward, one reverse.
- Simon Dermott: We can leave with the others and have a quiet dinner, or we stay. Then we're committed to go through with it. Do you really want it that much?
- Nicole Bonnet: More!
- Simon Dermott: Okay, you're the boss. Just do as I tell you.
- Nicole Bonnet: I didn't want to keep you waiting, so I got engaged to him. Is it alright? Am I on time?
- Simon Dermott: Perfectly. In fact, we have ten more minutes, so if you want to go back and marry him?
- [Evaluating Nicole's cleaning-woman costume]
- Simon Dermott: Yes, that's fine. That does it.
- Nicole Bonnet: Does what?
- Simon Dermott: Well, for one thing, it gives Givenchy a night off.
- Simon Dermott: Where precisely were you in the early part of the sixteenth century?
- Nicole Bonnet: I don't know but that's not how I was dressed.
- Simon Dermott: There's the bathroom, take off your clothes.
- Nicole Bonnet: Are we planning the same sort of crime?
- Simon Dermott: I want you to take a long look at the trees, the blue sky, and the river, all of which I personally loathe, which is why a juicy stretch in a French prison doesn't bother me at all.
- Nicole Bonnet: Marvelous.
- Simon Dermott: No applause, please. Wait till you see what I do for an encore.
- Nicole Bonnet: For a burglar you're not very brave, are you?
- Simon Dermott: I'm a society burglar. I don't expect people to rush about shooting me!
- Simon Dermott: [about to see Nicole to a taxi] Just one more tiny favour: like an idiot I forgot to wear gloves on the job. I may have left some fingerprints. Be an angel. Before you go to bed, just give the frame of the painting a little wipe with a clean cloth, ok?
- Nicole Bonnet: Certainly. Anything else? You wouldn't like a forged passport or some counterfeit money or...
- Simon Dermott: Oh, no no no.
- Nicole Bonnet: You're mad. Utterly mad. I suppose you want to kiss me goodnight?
- Simon Dermott: Oh, I don't usually, not on the first acquaintance, but you've been such a good sport...
- [he kisses her, she resists at first, than yields]
- Simon Dermott: [to the taxi driver] 38, Rue Parmentier, drive carefully.
- [to Nicole]
- Simon Dermott: Get a good night's sleep.
- Simon Dermott: [about the Cellini Venus] Oh! She's fine. She's wrapped up in one of my old shirts, just as snug as could be. I rocked her to sleep in my arms last night. It's the first time I ever did that with a grandmother.
- Simon Dermott: Our telephones may be tapped, so I'll conduct this entire conversation in Swahili. How are you?
- Simon Dermott: [being introduced to the museum head] Miss Bonnet and I are old friends. We used to shoot together.
- Nicole Bonnet: [seeing Simon eye the Venus] You wouldn't dare!
- Simon Dermott: Fear not. I'm off duty.