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Dean Martin in The Silencers (1966)

Dean Martin: Matt Helm

The Silencers

Dean Martin credited as playing...

Matt Helm

Photos7

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Quotes31

  • Tina: This is just like old times.
  • Matt Helm: Yeah, especially with that body on the floor.
  • [Pointing to Barbara in the background, who has just been shot twice in the back by Tina]
  • Tina: What do we do with *her*?
  • Matt Helm: You put her on ice, let ICE take care of it.
  • Tina: And what happens when the maid walks in, in the morning?
  • Matt Helm: You know, you're right. Let's put her in my bed, so we don't arouse suspicion.
  • [Matt and Tina start walking towards Barbara's body, cut]
  • Matt Helm: Don't you think we should be introduced first?
  • Barbara: You're Matt Helm.
  • Matt Helm: Good enough for me.
  • Gail Hendrix: What are you doing!
  • Matt Helm: Ah, shut up! And don't open your mouth until you get to the hotel!
  • Gail Hendrix: Well, how do you expect me to breathe?
  • Matt Helm: Don't!
  • Gail Hendrix: I want some music.
  • [Gail turns on car radio, Frank Sinatra's "Come Fly With Me" plays]
  • Matt Helm: Oh, turn him off, he's terrible!
  • [Gail changes the station, Dean Martin's "Everybody Loves Somebody" plays]
  • Matt Helm: Now there's a guy that can sing!
  • [after Gail had splashed water on Matt, she then spills a drink on him after falling over when he's lighting her cigarette]
  • Gail Hendrix: Oh, I'm terribly sorry.
  • Matt Helm: Yeah, I know you are.
  • Barbara: What's in Acapulco that you can't find here?
  • Matt Helm: Mexicans.
  • Matt Helm: You'd better take those clothes off before you catch pneumonia! Well, at least take the shoe off and the stockings off.
  • Gail Hendrix: You do it.
  • Matt Helm: I couldn't help noticing, but, these are your clothes?
  • Barbara: What if they are?
  • Matt Helm: Oh, I know you have a headache but don't take it out on me, I mean, what should I do with these?
  • Barbara: [in a breathy voice] Just throw them anywhere. I won't be needing them 'til morning.
  • Matt Helm: But I've been on leave from I.C.E. for a long time. As far as I'm concerned, I am out of it.
  • Tina: [pouring herself a drink] You're never out of Ice.
  • Tina: [concerned about a sniper outside] But what happens if he hits the gas tank?
  • Matt Helm: Smokey the Bear won't like it. Get in.
  • Tina: Are you on a vacation?
  • Gail Hendrix: Oh well, eh, I was on a tour, a sight-seeing tour. But eh, the man in charge of our group kept taking me places that weren't in the brochure.
  • Matt Helm: Where was that?
  • Gail Hendrix: His room.
  • Matt Helm: [to Tina] Making love to you is like playing Russian Roulette.
  • Gail Hendrix: Mr. Helm, now do I look like an enemy agent?
  • Matt Helm: Well I dunno, I haven't seen the latest models yet.
  • Gail Hendrix: You undressed me once and I didn't like it.
  • Matt Helm: Now, you're confusing romance with first aid!
  • Matt Helm: My name is Chump. Matt Chump.
  • Tina: [trying to get Matt to switch sides] You'll just die...
  • Matt Helm: Not in your bed.
  • Tina: What better place is there?
  • Matt Helm: Well, they finally figured out how to get blood out of a stone...
  • Matt Helm: [to Gail] You know, if you were an Indian, Custer would still be alive.
  • Matt Helm: Miss Kravezit...
  • Lovey Kravezit: Mr. Helm... would you please call me by my first name?
  • Matt Helm: Well, I don't *know* your first name.
  • Lovey Kravezit: It's "Lovey."
  • Matt Helm: [slightly incredulous] "Lovey Kravezit"?
  • Lovey Kravezit: Mm hmm.
  • Matt Helm: Oh, that's some kind of name!
  • [laughs]
  • Matt Helm: Talk about a booby trap. That's a crazy holster.

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