John Lennon credited as playing...
Gripweed
- Gripweed: Well, our officer calls me up and he says to me, he says, "Musketeer Gripweed..." He was a tall chap, some would call him weedy. I did. He said to me, and bear in mind that we were some few hundred miles behind enemy lines. He said, "green, green, green," so I did.
- Gripweed: I fought for three reasons. I can't remember what they were. The first reason gets you in, and the reason when you are in is staying alive. I won't know the reason they find afterwards, but it will be a very good one for why it was fought. I'm sure I'll be glad.
- Juniper: [re-enters scene still dressed as a clown, Drogue, Spool, Gripweed, and Clapper in tow] Bayonet!
- Transom: Bayonet?
- Spool: Where's your bayonet?
- Juniper: Must have left it sticking in the enemy, sir!
- Spool: Spur!
- Juniper: Where?
- Transom: Where's your spur?
- Juniper: Must have left it sticking in the horse, sir!
- Goodbody: [calls out] Two men!
- [exeunt players]
- Goodbody: [walks back to Transom and ex-Dooley, points his finger at ex-Dooley, shouting] There! On the end of my finger!
- Gripweed: [re-enter players] Finger!
- Juniper: Finger?
- Gripweed: Musketeer Juniper, where's your finger?
- Juniper: Must have left it sticking up the Khyber Pass, sir!
- Transom: Self-inflicted injury! March him off, Musket Major! Two - wait for it!
- [pause, players posed as if frozen while running]
- Transom: Two men!
- [exeunt players]