Danger!! Death Ray

AKA: Danger Death Ray, the funniest of the cheesy spy films that MST had fun with. Former Tarzan Gordon Scott sucks in his gut for this one. Professor Carmichael has developed a death ray "for peaceful purposes only" but a vague group of bad guys want it instead, so he's kidnapped by doughy guys and taken to their toy sub (via a toy helicopter)Bart Fargo must rescue him cause he's the only American spy who looks good in womany sunglasses. Cool music accompanies him as he searches for Carmichael while he must deal with evil Abe Lincolns, a fey bad guy tuned friend of Fargo's and a couple of women who he must sleep with. In the end the ineffective bad guy gets killed, the professor and the death ray get rescued and Bart gets the woman. There's also a complex scene with a watch thrown in a pool which symbolizes the amount of time that was wasted on smart screen writing for the movie.

Even considering that I'm in SOME ways an undiscriminating "Euro-Spy" movie fan, I'm really going to ask for it here. Yes, it had about the WORST miniatures EVER. (As Mystery Science Theatre put it, "Special effects by Billy.") And yes, "Bart Fargo" is a pretty unlucky name for a movie spy (outside of an all-out spy COMEDY). But in spite of that, I think the rest of it worked, as an "escapist" one. Its tries at comic relief (especially considering I'm seeing it as a dubbed movie) weren't bad, and neither were its "heroine", its villain or its "femme fatale." And I don't think Gordon Scott was at all wrong in the part. I just look away dramatically when those miniatures appear.

This spy shlocker isn't that bad. Sure, the acting isn't anything to brag about or the excitement (yawn!) of guys showcasing their butts climbing down ladders. Definitely Gordon Scott is for the ladies, but he actually does a decent job. Bart Fargo (Bart Fargo, Bart Fargo, Bart Fargo!!) has got to be the most hilarious spy name ever. How can you introduce yourself as "My name is Fargo...Bart Fargo." HA HA HA!!

There's also Abe Lincoln turned wrong, European guys, cool box switches, and the best special effects ever. I was fondly reminded of Matchbox and simulated naval tub warfare (Das Toy Boat) and it always gets me laughing (Special effects by Billy!). Plus, the best soundtrack ever with the "Bap-Bah-Dap-Bah-Dah-Dah" being grinded into your skull, but it's really fun to hum along with! A great tribute to Watermelon Man just adds to the kampy fun of it. Even the actors look like they know the movie wasn't that good, so there's ham a plenty to go around.

Plus, watch this MSTified and see Mike and the bots really bust their guts laughing. They really loved the helicopter scene too!

"The ocean is beautiful in this part of the tub."

This movie has a special place in my heart in that it was my VERY first MST3K episode. I've been a die-hard MSTIE ever since. "Death Ray's" just as much fun as "Double-O, Double-O 7" and "Diabolik."

Ahh yes, who could forget the breath taking submarine/helicopter scene and the "Ribbit!" guy!

Oh yes and "Bappa-da-da dada!"

Alright, so "Death Ray" isn't 007, and what can be? The main point to be made here is that the movie is FUN. Good fun. So, low-budget effects, corny (but oddly infecting) tunes, beautiful European women, and a muscular star are not what this film is about. It's fun! Everyone seems to have a good time hamming it up. You can see it even through the dubbed voices. Yes, MST3K riffed the film, but that doesn't mean it's bad. Give me 10 more Bart Fargo movies! I'd rather that than another overwrought post Connery/Moore Bond wannabe!!