Keenan Wynn credited as playing...
Senator Billboard Rawkins
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: You've been violating the law, here.
- Finian McLonergan: Since when?
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: This afternoon. I just finished drafting this.
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: [reading] Local ordinance number 7428: be it known that in the county of Rainbow Valley, it is a felony for members of the Caucasian and Negro races...
- Finian McLonergan: But it seems to me that this law could not be a legal law...
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: Of course it's legal! I don't know where you immigrants get these radical, foreign ideas!
- Sharon McLonergan: From a wee book the immigration officer handed us. It's called 'The United States Constitution.'
- Finian McLonergan: Haven't you read it?
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: I don't have time to read it, I'm too busy defending it!
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: My family's been having nothing but trouble with immigrants ever since they come to this country!
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: [dictating a speech to Buzz] Gentlemen, the festering tides of radicalism are upon us. But before I yield up our glorious South -and her sister commowealth, the U.S. of A - I will lay down my life. I will do more - I will filibuster. Back, you crackpots! Forward, America! Forward to the hallowed principles of our forefathers. Forward to the sweet tranquility of the status quo. Forward... to yesterday!
- Sharon McLonergan: Father is a mineralogist from the old country. He can make gold sprout out of the ground.
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: Gold? There's no gold in Ireland.
- Finian McLonergan: I meself discovered a vein our countrymen have been searching for ever since the reign of... Alfred the Thoughtless.
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: Who?
- Finian McLonergan: You've never heard of Alfred the Thoughtless? He was King of Erin following his father, Thomas the Temporary, who in turn was the only son of the Virgin Queen, Serena the Spotless.
- Sharon McLonergan: Do you mean to say you're taking this land from these people merely because their skins are black?
- Henry: Don't let them chase us!
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: Will you shut this kid up? He's making me look like a bully. All right, Sheriff, get them out of here.
- Sheriff: You heard the Senator, you folks better start packin' your things.
- Boy: Is Henry the wrong color?
- Sharon McLonergan: No, of course not. He's the right color.
- [she walks towards Senator Rawkins]
- Sharon McLonergan: But there's something wrong with the world! Oh, I wish...
- Finian McLonergan: Sharon. Sharon.
- Sharon McLonergan: There's something wrong with the world that you and your kind have made for people like Henry! I wish you could know what that world is like. I wish to God you were black!
- [wind, thunder]
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: Well, I'm a son of a biscuit...
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: I can't show my face.
- Og: What's wrong with your face?
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: Are you blind, boy? I'm black!
- Og: I think it's very becoming.
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: It is NOT! I'm a white man, dammit! A white man! At least I was, up until a couple of days ago.
- Og: Well, that's a coincidence! I was green a couple of weeks ago! Don't you find the occasional change of color interesting?
- Og: I'll have to alter your personality. Stand up please.
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: Why don't you leave me alone?
- Og: Oh, this won't be a bit hard. All we have to do is broaden out that narro mind, reduce some of the bigotry, and your pomposity won't show through at all. Wait till everyone sees you in your new spring psyche. People will say you're in love. Now - 'Fiddle, foddle, foil and fiddle/ cure this fuddled individual / whirl, ye waters and unwind/ this tangled, medieval mind / breath of bee and bluebird's wing / make his scowling spirits sing / balm of briar, sandlewood / season him with brotherhood / magic vapors, make this person a better person / Not a worse 'un.' - He sleeps! The cure's beginning to work!
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: You don't understand, boy. You're nothing when you're black! Nothing!
- Og: Nothing? Who says so?
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: The law says.
- Og: Well, it's a silly law. But is it a legal law?
- Senator Billboard Rawkins: Of course it's legal. I wrote it myself!