Bob Hope credited as playing...
Sgt. Dan O'Farrell
- Pvt. Johnny Bannon: Sarge, movie starts in about five minutes. It's a double feature, Sarge. Two Bing Crosby pictures.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: Bite your tongue.
- Calvin Coolidge Ishimura: Don't shoot. I'm an American like you. I'm Calvin Coolidge Ishimura.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: Yeah, and I'm Sessue Hayakawa O'Farrell.
- Maria: And I don't care if the Army does come first... as long as I'm the first woman.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: And the last.
- Capt. Elwood Prohaska: Now, what else do you have to suggest we do about this dry spell?
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: Get girls.
- Capt. Elwood Prohaska: Girls? That's impossible.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: Well, I know they'll never replace beer, but it's worth a try.
- Lt. Lyman P. Jones: Sorry, I bit your hand, but I was dreaming about Nurse Krause again.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: Yeah, those reruns are murder.
- Lt. Lyman P. Jones: You wouldn't believe it, but she doesn't look too bad in a long, blonde wig.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: Not if she wears it backwards.
- [while on guard duty as others on the base watch a Bing Crosby movie, Sgt. O'Farrell hears the crowd laughing]
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: He must be singin' again.
- Nurse Nellie Krause: Remember, I'm a nurse. I've got the cure for what ails you.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: Nobody's THAT sick.
- [after seeing Nurse Krause, Sgt. O'Farrell screeches his jeep to a halt before Lt. Jones]
- Lt. Lyman P. Jones: Yeah, I know. You're lost and you need a map to get home.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: Worse. I know where I am. I need a map to get lost.
- [Dan and Maria reunite]
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: I haven't been kissed like that since I re-enlisted.
- Maria: Then you ARE glad to see me.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: I got the shakes. It's either you or malaria.
- Capt. Elwood Prohaska: [delivering Sgt. O'Farrell's eulogy] He always knew what to do... till the day he died.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: He died? Who, me? That's the Army for you. Nobody tells ya anything.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: [looking down at Maria on the beach] Pardon me, have we met somewhere before? I never forget a face; I'll get to yours in a minute.
- Lt. Cmdr. Roger Snavely: Not being a drinking man myself, I probably don't understand the importance of liquor.
- Sgt. Dan O'Farrell: Right, sir. That would be like a cannibal ordering a baked potato.